[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/adv/ - Advice



Thread archived.
You cannot reply anymore.



What’s wrong with me guys? I don’t like any men particularly but I want them to want me. I only feel good when they showed their affection only to me. When someone I tried to seduce, to make him want me and he didn’t I feel frustrated, especially when he showed his interest in other girls not me.
Help me. I don’t want to be like this anymore
>>
File: 1499870206113.jpg (58 KB, 450x443)
58 KB
58 KB JPG
So you're a woman? And you don't like that you are acting like one?
>>
Feeling good because other people find you attractive is normal and you don't have some uniquely female situation. I'm a straight man and I went through a phase of doing the same thing with women. However, there almost certainly is an underlying problem. More than likely, you have low self-esteem and act the way you do to try boosting yourself up.
>>
>>19016572
What do you mean by that?
I am a woman yes. The thing is when that only one didn’t fell for my trap and instead showing his attention to another girl I frustrated inside. This got me into trouble once, I tried to seduce a guy that didn’t want me at that moment and later on when he fell for me I kind of rejected him and he moved on, got a girlfriend and I started to trying and seduce him again. He got confused about it and fora while we didn’t talk. This is why I want to change. It happens now and then, every damn time
>>
>>19016576
The problem is I’m quite attractive. I decent looking, fit, work out. Men told me I’m cute/sexy before and men hitting on me at uni and work alot. But that is that. I enjoyed the games but I don’t want them to be something to me
>>
>>19016557
>but I want them to want me
>attention whore
Some attention whores get raped, i's all I'm going to say.
>>
>>19016593
>The problem is I’m quite attractive
I feel your "pain" there. Plenty of women have told me that I could be a model. But I don't think the problem is your looks or that you enjoy attention. There's nothing wrong with being good-looking and it's healthy to like it when people show their interest in you.

> I enjoyed the games but I don’t want them to be something to me
I still think that you need to approach underlying causes. Maybe there's something else missing in your life, or there's past pain that's unresolved, but I find it hard to believe that this behaviour is just a thing in itself.
>>
>>19016557

Astrology would legitimately help. If the person knows what they are doing. I know what this is.

I doubt many astrology readers do though.

I've just had something that might be this for a few months. Sucked the energy right out of me. Caused all sorts of problems at work.

I think you need to understand karma, karma is not abstract or etheric at all it can be clearly traced through a psychology session and in politics.
>>
>>19016621
I don’t dress provocated. I know where and when to dress up suitably. I never wear something that shows my cleavage to be honest.
>>19016624
>Maybe there's something else missing in your life, or there's past pain that's unresolved
Maybe this. I don’t know. A lot happened to my childhood but not sure if it’s the cause. I have a temper wanted to be left alone, but also crave for someone company that can be alone with me. Like just being there and won’t asking me to show them or to do anything for them. Just want to be alone, but alone with someone else.
>>
>>19016557
Me too. I started dancing at an exotic club. Get plenty of male attention but if forces me to deal with them wanting the other girls. At first I got really angry particularly when one guy would pay for several dances or was a repeat customer in the club and then another girl would see him and take him for themselves.
>>
>>19016651
>I think you need to understand karma
What karma are you talking about?
>>
>>19016557
>What’s wrong with me guys?
I'm very sorry, but you are human
>>
>>19016654
>Get plenty of male attention but if forces me to deal with them wanting the other girls
Same here. Have you any troubles or any trauma from your childhood? Did one of your parents neglected you? Or you was compared with your siblings?
>>
File: 1503616519288.png (182 KB, 660x660)
182 KB
182 KB PNG
Imagine if the US had a female president :P
>>
>>19016652
You don't know what will trigger some sick dudes.
My advice is stop seeking attention cause you might get it in other ways.
>>
>>19016667
I don't think so but then again I had nothing to compare my childhood with, thinking it was normal. I try to say away from looking for something or someone I can blame. I do know there are people in the world that has it much worse than me.

I was always told I was pretty. If I did something bad or good, any comment either began or ended with you're such a cute girl.
>>
The real question is why don't you like any men. Once you do like a man in particular, and he likes you back, you'll be in good shape.
>>
>>19016557
Do you have a SO?
>>
>>19016687
>I was always told I was pretty. If I did something bad or good, any comment either began or ended with you're such a cute girl.
So maybe we should think about what else you have going for you? For example, it seems like you're a compassionate person because you're concerned about other people having it worse than you.
>>
>>19016701
This is not OP replying so I’ll let her talk on this matter
>>
>>19016687
I see. I just wanna know if childhood traumas caused this problems. Since I had problems in the past so I just don’t know if it’s the case
>>19016697
I wondered the same my whole life. I like someone, he liked me vack, I’m bailed. It’s a circle and no ending. Happened every dam time. I just want someone that doesn’t want me to like me and bail them. Or I’m gonna fall for some chad only to get hurt
>>19016700
No in a really long time. I do have a highchool sweetheart who rejected me to go married and have kids with my close friend of me in high school tho
>>
>>19016701
Don't give me too much credit, I haven't done anything to help those less fortunate.

I don't know what else, school was easy, I was popular but only because I was pretty and the guys liked me, really didn't give it much thought otherwise since I was never forced to. I was usually the prettiest girl in class, every guy told me so, and the girls hated me for it.
>>
>>19016715
>No in a really long time.
That's probably why then. Go on lots of dates until you find a compatible guy, get to know him and cuddle( pic related).
>>
>>19016735
I do go on dates bro. There were short term relationships as well. I just never ever been in a proper relationship since then
>>
>>19016748
>I just never ever been in a proper relationship since then
If something is not working you don't keep doing it. Change your methods.
>>
>>19016557

Another male anon who did similar things in the past chipping in:

For perspective: I was basically an ugly duckling growing up. I'm not actually sure that's 100% true, because if I *actually* think about it, there are countless moments where I got attention growing up, but the point is I definitely thought of myself that way.

I was a shy, quite kid that didn't really like himself and didn't think anyone else could like me either.

When I hit 17/18 I decided to start changing, and I did. I dressed better, I smiled more, I walked straighter, spoke louder, and tried to become more social, and bit by bit I started noticing more people give me more and more attention.

And when I started fully dating, I started to build confidence in my looks, my charm, and personality because I started to realize, people, girls in particular, really like me.

And at some point, I started to get almost addicted to that attention. On certain interactions I would almost purposefully do shit that I *knew* toed the line, just to see how much I could get away with. Be a little *too* flirty here, be a little *too* suggestive then, be a little *too* intimate with my touches there, etc.

And I eventually realized what was going on: As a formerly shy as fuck kid who (thought) he was getting ignored all his life (even though that's not true), i was finally getting attention, and I was getting addicted to it, because it made me feel better about myself.

Shortly after I realized that, I also realized that's not the type of person I wanted to be, and I started toning down a lot of the shit i was doing. To be fair, a lot of it wasn't intentional, a lot of it was a natural extension of me being me, but there WAS some part of it that was, and I knew I was crossing lines, I just didn't want to say it out loud until that moment.

>continued
>>
>>19016782
>cont


I have another female friend who does basically the same thing I used to. She seems to have a similar thing to me where she had kind of a giant shock in her college years when she realized, guys fucking dig her, and since then she's always been pushing boundaries and toeing the line.

We get along fucking amazingly if nothing else than because we flirt the ever fucking love out of one another. None of it is ever serious, it's always harmless teasing and messing around. I literally cannot even think of her sexually (Hell I've even stripped her naked to toss her drunken ass in showers a few times and passed out next to her naked ass. And nothing. it's pretty funny even if I want to, it's like a fog of white noise in my head). We're just basically hype-men for one another and try to make eachother feel good. And the sad thing is...

While I've kind of realized what's going on with me and worked to fix it, she's still stuck repeating the same cycle of attention seeking in her general life, and it's resulted in some pretty deep issues of self-loathing and self-sabotage. And it kind of breaks my heart a little because I love her like a little sister.

This shits hard, but you gotta face whatever it is that's making you feel like you need to compensate for it. If you want to change, do it. Take one small step at a time and work towards being someone you can genuinely say you love and respect.
>>
>>19016774
Change how? No dating and go straight to the bed?
>>
It's actually not a big deal at all, but
>have to deal with them liking other girls
Dont be fucking selfish, man. If you don't even want someone, don't monopolize them or lead them on just to fuel your own ego when you know you don't even want them, just to keep them away from someone that might. That's a really shitty thing to do.
>>
Because society has conditioned you to think you're only worth something as a woman if people find you attractive. Find some hobbies and interests. Stop obsessing over your looks and if other people find you attractive or not.
>>
>>19017021
This is why I want to change. I know it’s not right but I can’t help it. I’m quite decent looking so I don’t think self esteem is the case. I don’t doubt my appearance. Just don’t know why I still seeking for men attention
>>
>>19016572
>>19016621
>>19016669
go back to r9k




Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.