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GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers. Use paragraph breaks where appropriate.
If you can’t handle upsetting answers, don't ask.
And please no derailing arguments. This means people who ask questions too! You will be bullied out of this thread.

FAQ:
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity, penis size/shape, or lack of dating experience>
>Do most/any girls/guys like <any trait as described above>?
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no “magic moment” (or activity) that will instantly change you.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. “Signs” of attraction are meaningless.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Coffee is the preferred first date, but any of the following may also work: lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>I'm insecure because of my <four-inch/cut/uncut/phimotic> penis
>Do women prefer penises of certain qualities?
Fuck off

>Why can't <women/men> just give a straightforward rejection?!
Fuck off

>Why is there no new thread?
Create one yourself. You can use these macros: https://imgur.com/a/y6BF2
>>
My ex would get pissy with me if I asked her to repeat something due to my incapacity to evaluate information. It takes a little time for me to register something that has been said. And I'm sure it'd get frustrating after a while but how would other girls react?

I think it shows that I actually gave a shit that I would ask her what she said
>>
>>20119407
If they see you romantically, they will get mad.
If they see you as retarded well...
>>
>>20119407
No it would get tiring constantly being asked ‘can you repeat that i wasn’t paying attention’ like what are you, five?
>>
Didnt get much traction last thread

To the slightly more promiscuous/fun ladies

I have this girl (friend of one of my friends) that I made out pretty hard with at a party. She singled me out, sat on my lap, and we went at it. Like, going into the other room making out, with her tellig me how hot I was and all that. I didn’t get a chance to get a number because I myself wasn’t thinking of the future, just in the moment. This girl will 100% be at a party with me again soon, like soon soon.


My question is, what are the odds that she goes for me again? She and I were pretty drunk and flirty, but I can’t see it from her perspective. Like do girls go for the same guys most of the time if they thought they were hot
>>
>>20119425
Part 2

Well the thing is my friend something that kind of bothered me I think maybe out of jealousy. Basically he said:

“Well she’s really slutty (his words, kinda harsh) and she’ll probably be hooking up with one of my brothers friends next party (they’re older)”

What are some things I can do to maybe have a better chance of that not happening so I can get with her?
>>
So let's say I have a date with a girl next tuesday. What the fuck do I talk to her about until then?

Do normies really talk to their girls every day all day?
>>
>>20119425

It depends in the girl. I'm a reformed sloot and personally I'd never have gone for the same guy twice, simply because they tend to get ideas after that and get attached. But she might go for you again if she had fun last time, if she is looking for some kind of regular arrangement, or if you manage to be fun and flirty again. You've got a pretty good chance.
>>
>>20119430
Noo don't talk to her all the time, quality over quantity. Hit her with something interesting and then don't force it at all
>>
>>20119437
Okay, well but then the conversation will die fast and when it comes to tuesday she'll either not respond or just be like "oh anon something came up sorry".
>>
>>20119430
Talk about something constructive and then take that and be interesting.
Say you have something that your doing or whatever or if she's doing something ask about it and try to 'achive something'. Then don't act interested, be interested. Don't be clingy and try to atleat once end the conversation because you have to do something (this will make you seem like you actually do stuff other than sit around all day).
>>
>>20119434
I feel like I fucked up not getting the snapchat
>>
>>20119441
Okay, so let's say I end it. When do I talk to her again?

Jesus christ talking to girls is so confusing. It's not even fun. I'm just operating under the assumption that once we meet and she actually starts displaying more interest it'll all click and she'll be more interesting.

Though I feel like girls are in general boring, even the interesting ones. Like I don't really feel like talking to them. Unless we're arguing. I kinda enjoy arguing with girls but they all get so butthurt about things.
>>
>>20119440
Nonono anon
You save conversations like that when talking to her
>>
>>20119446
What do you mean "save"?
>>
>>20119451
it means that otherwise irl you will have nothing to talk about

Til tuesday it doesn't really matter if the conversation dies, just pretend you're busy as fuck, write her something funny/interesting and then be like "need to go now, talk to you later"
>>
>>20119451
Lets say you get the urge to talk to this girl. Then get more info on the topic. Instead of sending her text like she is already your pal, save it when you go to meet her face to face. That way you wont have too many awkward silences.
>>
>>20119466
Okay and what, do I not talk to her until then?

>>20119467
I have absolutely no issue talking in person actually. I totally suck at texting and keeping girls interested until the date though.
>>
>>20119471
Find some thing she is interested in and look for something she might not have noticed that is related to those intrests.
>>
So I have had a short but pretty enthusiastic convo with a girl on tinder and it has been going pretty well.
She said she is into playing botw, but sucks at it, big shocker i know.
I was about to write
>Maybe we should meet up some time and figure the game out together
>But in the meantime, what do you think about grabbing some drinks?
thoughts?
>>
>>20119543

Stick to one offer and be more decisive. Ask her if she is free on a specific date to go out, not a general "someday", "meantime", or whatever.
>>
>>20119543
Grab drinks and talk her into the game.

Just meet her asap.
>>
>>20119547
I don't think she'd go for playing the video game as a first date, I was just using that as a sort of segue to asking her for the actual date (drinks).
How would you word it?
>>
>>20119555
It has to be in flow with the conversation so post the last few messages you've exchanged.
>>
>>20119555
>I don't think she'd go for playing the video game as a first date

Yeah, why would she not want to be alone with you on a couch... right?

But if you really don't trust the videogame thing, doesn't matter, just ask her out for drinks.
>>
>>20119561
Before this point it's just a bit of flirtatious banter

Me
>*naming bunch of stuff I do in my free time*
>I like gaming too, but I don't have a switch unfortunately. Really want to try BotW

Her
>Not bad! (about my hobbies)
>I only recently got it, of course with BotW
>I'm pretty bad at it though, can't fight so well

Just fill in the emojis with your imagination
>>
>>20119555
Dont force stuff. If you feel like offering to play together is out of context, ditch the idea. Sometimes we have good ideas just not for the right time. Save it, maybe it'll be useful on another day.
>>
>>20119569
>What do you think about grabbing a drink today? And maybe bring the Switch so I could help you figure it out, I'm pretty good at figuring out vidya.
>>
>>20119585
No, the switch needs to stay at her place so he has an excuse to come back to her place and fuck her.
>>
>>20119589

Someone gets it!
>>
Simple one!

Chick I've been seeing told me she was on her period the other day, so no sexy times. Is it OK to gift her a bit of 'period time snack' (oh lord using quotes makes that terrible.. I mean like chips and chocolate). I've been conditioned by my past relationships to do such. I just don't want to make it weird. This is the first time she mentioned it to me, we've been hanging out for 2+ months.
>>
>>20119589
If she's not a fucking slut she won't fuck him right away. Jesus christ, anon. Not all girls are like this.

Besides, he's much more likely to bring her to his place than the opposite. Girls don't like bringing strangers to their place on the first date.
>>
>>20119555
Playing a game (that she expressed interest in) would be just fine I bet. Be yourself, laugh when you die in unusual ways. You can always drink while you play too, order in some pizza, whatever. Just be yourself, laugh, smile, enjoy the time. Keep it light and casual, she'll probably touch your leg/knee if she's feeling you.
>>
>>20119594

I'd suggest you offer snacks. You are not thinking about showing up unannounced, right?

Just don't take it personally if she doesn't want to see you at the moment.
>>
>>20119598
>Girls don't like bringing strangers to their place on the first date
a sure way to get ourselves killed is to bring them to our place or go to theirs. The problem with them knowing where I live is if I do get through the evening alive and unhurt they will return and never leave me alone.

I realize women engage in this risky behavior but having sex isn't worth dying over.
>>
>>20119603
Call me old fashioned, but I think most people prefer a first date to be on neutral ground.
Meeting up at someones place is better left to a second or third date imo, when it's reasonable to assume that neither party is a crazy axe murderer.
>>
>>20119614
This guy knows what's up. Anon isn't likely a typical pussy slayer, so that shit just won't work for him. Neutral ground is best.
>>
>>20119608
No not unannounced. We've been getting together weekly+. Plans to meet up today and get lunch/hangout, etc. I bring her little things in general all the time, so it wouldn't be out of character.

Just wanted to see if it was weird/creepy to offer the snacks for that particular reason. Show that i've been well trained lol..

And yeah, I get the might not want to be seen part. Actually speaks to a larger theory I have but thats neither here nor there.
>>
>>20119638
>Actually speaks to a larger theory I have but thats neither here nor there.

Listen, tease your girlfriend, not us. If you want to say something, say it. Don't wait for us to ask "What theory?".

Good luck man!
>>
>>20119594
Bring her chocolate
>>
>>20119662
...flavoured condoms
>>
How do i fuck goth girls?
>>
>>20119673

Like any other girls, with your peepee in her coochie.

And you get to that point just like with any other girl, by going out, flirting, etc.
>>
>>20119673
Talk to them, get in tune with their dumb beliefs and hobbies, agree with it all.
>>
How Important Is Height the the general female population?, I'm 5"4' and wonder If that hurts my chance of ever being Noticed
>>
>>20119702

>There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.


It's literally in the OP, the first point of the FAQ. The inability to follow social conventions of the place you are in is also not a huge point on your favor. We are tired of the same question everyday.
>>
>>20119706
My Bad, I missed that one (I know it's the very first one)
>>
>Girls
If a man can't manhandle you in bed, can't physically carry you around, Will you think less of him as a man?
>>
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Girls

if you've never smoked weed before (same goes for your bf), would you try it with him if he asked?
>>
>>20119791
Yes.
>>
>>20119554
I asked her to grab drinks with me tonight.
Is it bad if she hasn't responded i a couple of hours?
Did I maybe move too fast?
>>
>>20119821
Wait 24 hours. Girls sometimes kill the notifications from tinder because they get so many.
>>
>>20119791
Even if you look like that guy you can manhandle most women simply by being male. It's funny how easy it is as a skeleton myself to pin their arms and legs down while fucking them.
>>
>>20119806
im a 23 year old female smoking a bong so

no
>>
How do I start texting this girl? I noticed this really hot girl in my class would glance at me a lot so I got her number at the end of class.
The thing is, I don't really know how to text her and get past school stuff. We do have a test coming up next week but she is the one who always asks me for help in class.
>>
Both genders

I have a date coming up tomorrow. It’s not my first or even second time doing this, but I still feel pretty inexperienced, so I’d like to ask

1. How long *should* a date last to feel neither too long nor too short (I.e. the sweet spot)?
2. In case the date doesn’t go well, what’s the best / most tasteful way to end it quickly?

Thanks in advance
>>
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Why are men so pathetic?

It's really astounding the depths to which thirst will sink a man.
>>
>>20119806
Sure, though I’m definitely not into substance abuse (including really tame shit like coffee)
>>
>>20119916
Lmao she looks like the incel guy from youtube!
>>
>>20119916
Men are subhuman automata programmed to fuck anything with a vagina.
>>
>>20119916
Context?
>>
>>20119895
Are you already texting with her?

>>20119913
Guy here.
1. As long as you find it comfortable and as long as you're having fun. I'd say it'd be a good idea if you're the one ending the date. Don't let her do it, it's risky as hell.
2. "Alright, I suppose it's time I went home, I have work early tomorrow" or some shit like this.
>>
>>20119928
This guy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tuf59ex-U0
>>
>>20119929
Thanks a lot! I’ll make sure to prepare a decent excuse.
>>
>>20119929
No, I'm not. I just talk to her in class when I can. I just got her number at the beginning of this week, was never good at starting text convos.
>>
>>20119927
I sure as fuck wouldn't.
I have plenty of ugly and/or fat chicks thirsting for my dick, but I would rather not have sex at all than fuck someone I am not attracted to at least a little.
>>
>>20119936
To make it more legit just say it before the date begins or right as it begins.

>>20119938
In this case a simple "hey, what's up?" seems to work relatively well. Text her in the evening, so that the conversation won't drag on for too long (you can end it by saying you're going to bed).
>>
Guys

How do you feel when a girl starts very visibly dropping spaghetti on a date (eg. shaking, stuttering)? Asking for a friend.
>>
>>20119953
Never seen a girl do it. Only ones that are kinda silent but in that case I usually assume it's not autism but the fact that she's just not interested and is waiting for this to end.
>>
How do I talk to girls?
>>
>>20119971
Open your mouth and make sounds
>>
>>20119971
Imagine that they're dumb ugly sluts with low self esteem

Not in the sense of degrading women, but to gain the confidence to talk to them freely without sounding like a desperate horny virgin
>>
>>20119998
Not a good advice. It still doesn't help the fact that women are boring as fuck to talk to. Like literally they have ZERO fucking interests.
>>
>>20120000
Talk about instabook, chad or the new iphone with them
>>
I asked a girl out via Facebook on Tuesday. She said she didn’t have time because of critiques and work. Which I know is true due to her situation.
She said she would have time between Thursday and Sunday. So I her to go out today and she left me on delivered. Should I send another message or wait til another time?
>>
>>20120015
I literally can't discuss any of those topics. Maybe iphone but I'd just shit all over it.
>>
>>20120000
you're clearly trying to talk to the wrong women...
>>
>>20120046
>wrong women
Am I? In my life I have met only ONE woman I connected with and she was the only girl I was legitimately interested in listening to. Honestly even those travelling girls (so like most girls really) are boring as fuck. They're travelling and seeing shit. So what. Those girls just can't talk about shit with any sort of passion or energy that'd hook me up or make me interested. They couldn't crack a joke even if their life depended on it.

And mind you, this is all kinds of girls. Tinder girls, even a girl that my friends tried to hook me up with (it's a friend of theirs) who was pretty smart and nice. Just boring as hell.
>>
>>20119953
If that happened I would probably be surprised more than anything else.
>>
>>20120051
what are you interests anyways? It sounds to me like you are searching someone but don't really go out of a certain "range" of girls. Could it be that you have too high standards in looks? It's just kind of a sad reality that most girls that try to emulate the Kardashian look for example are kind of same minded. Of course that doesnt apply for every single girl out there, but to me it sounds like you are choosing by looks first and then are disapointed
>>
>>20120058
>what are you interests anyways?
I have rather manly interests. I like shooting, military, cars, technology, vidya, movies, music and making music and a ton of other things. If girls are ever interested in any of these, it's usually extremely surface level.

>Could it be that you have too high standards in looks?
No. I talked to LOTS of girls and honestly the meme where "ugly girls are more interesting" needs to stop. They're not. In fact, I've noticed the exact opposite.

>It's just kind of a sad reality that most girls that try to emulate the Kardashian look for example are kind of same minded
I don't know, I generally don't talk to such girls. I try different ones.

The only girls that are actually interesting to talk to are usually the crazy borderline ones, especially slutty ones. I don't know, maybe it has to do with their exposure to many males which is why they somehow take up their interests? Fuck knows.

>choosing by looks first and then are disapointed
You have no idea how wrong you are there, mate.
>>
Seems I riled someone up with the question. I mean, how do I talk to women without them being all reserved and uncomfortable? It seems impossible to make friends with them. It's not like they ever initiate anything either.
>>
>>20120079
>how do I talk to women without them being all reserved and uncomfortable?

Are you open and feel comfortable when talking to other people? Why do you act differently with women?
>>
>>20120036

Wait, and is she doesn't reply, move on. Maybe she is busy, maybe she is not interested. Either way, it seems you won't be getting a date with her anytime soon.
>>
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>at the end of our weekly date night
>gf of 1 year is very drunk
>she tells me "I think we might end up breaking up because I'm just not very interested in us anymore"
>has the gall to claim she misspoke in the morning
>she says "I think I'm just in a rut because of life stress, we'll be fine"
How should I break up with her?
>>
Do women sort men into the dehumanizing categories of "alpha" and "beta"?
>>
>>20120083
I don't act differently but they look at me like I'm crazy while men don't. If I had to guess the situations I try to talk to them are wrong. So when is it ok?
>>
>>20120095

I've only ever seen men do it.
>>
>>20120073
>You have no idea how wrong you are there, mate.
First of all, how am I supposed to know anything? You're the one who asked a vague as fuck question in the first place.

>I like shooting, military, cars, technology, vidya, movies, music and making music and a ton of other things.
>If girls are ever interested in any of these
Where the hell do you live? I've been in a shooting club for years, and there have been tons of other girls in rival clubs as well. And idk what kind of music and movies you are into, but it's almost impossible to not find ANYONE who shares your tastes. I mean, come on try to define surface level.

>"ugly girls are more interesting" needs to stop.
Never said that. But I've seen tons of posts like yours, and it always went into the same direction where the dude just had too high standards.

Well, if you don't have too high standards in looks then you probably have them intellectually. Again, please define what you consider as surface level and maybe we can start talking about where you should start in a conversation about those topics.
>>
>>20120099
>If I had to guess the situations I try to talk to them are wrong.

Why would you say that?

Also, you didn't answer me. Are you regularly and open and comfortable person?
>>
>>20120095
If they do, they definitely don't do it consciously.
>>
>>20120104
I'm trying to be, which is why I now try to start conversations with strangers. A year ago it would've been an impossible task for me.

>Why would you say that?
I can't think of any other reasons. I guess women always assume you're hitting on them if there's no good reason to talk.
>>
>>20120118
I sort them mostly into gay looking, chad looking and nowadays onions boy open mouth type looking.
>>
>>20120095
Bump
>>
>>20120121
>I'm trying to be,

So, you are not open and comfortable when talking to men, and you wonder why it's even harder when you approach strange women out of the blue?

Dude, this is not a big mystery. It's pretty obvious what's going on.
>>
>>20120123
lmao since when do they change s o y to onions
>>
>>20120133
It's been like that for ages newfag.
>>
>>20120128
Well I'm pretty sure there's no shortcuts for learning when it comes to sperglords like me, but I was wondering if there's a way to improve while causing the least amount of anguish for everyone.
>>
>>20120137

You shouldn't focus on approaching strangers, you should focus on yourself and how you feel socially. This work is internal, and then you should move into places where you are comfortable. Jumping strange women won't help you.
>>
>>20120136
maybe we are just not frequenting the same threads. I bet you like the dick rating ones on /fit/?
>>
>>20119827
She still hasn't replied...
Should I shoot her a quick message saying something like "No sweat if you don't feel like it right now" or something?
This is pretty much the first time I really felt like I clicked with a girl on this app, I am afraid of getting buried under newer matches...
>>
>>20120144
That's how I stagnate, though. It's so hard to make any 'slow' improvement, so I try to challenge myself even if I end up embarrassed. It's worth it as long as I feel like I'm making progress.
>>
>>20120183

Do you think challenging yourself to grab fire will help you move to Egypt?

That's the sort of rationale you are using. You are not comfortable with social interaction in general, so instead of looking into it, instead of processing what you feel and how you interact with the people close to you, you expect faster results by going to strangers as if that would help.

It won't help. As you said, these women think you are hitting on them. And they don't know you, so your usual uncomfortable demeanor looks more dangerous to them. Your friends might understand how you feel and why you act weird. Strangers don't. Jumping strangers won't help you at all. You are not working towards being more open, you are working towards being a creep.
>>
>>20119832
I'm in decent shape and I can't lift my obese gf more than an inch.

Tfw Amerilard
>>
>>20120197
Sure, all of that sounds very nice on paper, but I don't believe I can make any big changes with my very limited social group. At the very least I'd need to put myself in situations where I can meet new people.
>>
>>20120219
>At the very least I'd need to put myself in situations where I can meet new people.

I hope that means picking out new hobbies and not hitting on strangers on the bus.

Yes, expanding your social circles is fine. But do it right. Get into a class or something that you like and meet people there. Not only women, people in general. Go out more, do new things more.
>>
>>20120219
I am in the same boat, but I find it very hard to make new connections that last.
Like, I go to a bar by myself, chat up the people there, have a good time, get along with people, but then the night ends and I pretty much never see these people again.
Back at square one basically.
How do I form meaningful connections with strangers?
>>
>>20120225
>How do I form meaningful connections with strangers?

You don't. A single night won't create meaningful connections. You need to spend more time with people. Have more things in common. That's why we make friends in school. We spend a lot of time with them, we share a lot.
>>
>>20120103
>First of all, how am I supposed to know anything? You're the one who asked a vague as fuck question in the first place.
I don't know, mate, you keep giving this typical meme assumptions about people, which in reality are completely false.

>Where the hell do you live? I've been in a shooting club for years, and there have been tons of other girls in rival clubs as well.
Poland. Not a single girl in the club, at least I haven't seen one so far.

>idk what kind of music and movies you are into, but it's almost impossible to not find ANYONE who shares your tastes
Electronic music. But the only girls I ever met that are into it were the typical club sloots which aren't even into the music as much as into party and getting coked up.

>come on try to define surface level
Let's say we talk about cars and discuss them. I get into deeper shit, about mechanics and motorsports and the girl is like "haha nah I just like watching Top Gear tehee!". Or music. I'm pretty autistic about subgenres or about music in general since I make music myself. Girls are more like "oh yeah I like x, they're pretty cool", while I'm talking about how frequencies carry over distance differently. Or even worse when the girl is like "nah I don't like electronic music because it's ezshit to make".

>the dude just had too high standards
Trust me, I talked to ugly girls too, since well the more attractive ones wouldn't even give me the time of day.

>Well, if you don't have too high standards in looks then you probably have them intellectually.
Maybe you're right. Then again, I can't really lower the intellectual standards. I'm not really that smart, I'm just autistic about things I like, just like any other guy I guess...
>>
>>20120200
Wasn't talking about lifting. But even that would be possible with a skinny body if most women were not fat.
>>
>>20120000
Numbers confirm.
Girls just don't need to be smart or have any interests, literally just existing will get them through life.
>>
>Was fucking a coworker 2 years ago
>Broke up(we didn't really have a relationship so i can't call that breaking up) and it really hurt me because i was so in love with her (she wasn't at all) and start doing all kinds of stupid shit like telling my friends and coworkers what a whore she is and stalking her and shit
>Meet another girl in the meantime, date for a year , break up with her recently(irrelevant to the story)
>Basically im over her, of course if she approached me im sure i'd fall head over heels for her
>Now they moved us to the same office and recently she confronted me and basically she knows about all the shitty stuff i did and told me if i do it again she will move legally against me pretty much

And the worst part is that this all my fault. 100%. Is there any way to salvage this situation or make it less shittier? I regret what i did because i was extremely emotionally immature and i understand it now, i have very little experience with women so of course i got super butthurt and did all that stupid crap.
>>
>>20120242
What you are describing is being a massive bore.
Like going to dinner with James May (as you mentioned Top Gear).
He would bombard you with facts about the rubber used in the mud flaps on a 1993 toyota pickup truck all evening. It would be terrible.
That shit is not interesting mate. To pretty much anyone but yourself.
>>
>>20120259
And yet somehow when talking to guys we're all having fun and we can easily carry the conversation.
>>
>>20120265
Because you only hang out with turbo nerds who are into that kind of stuff.
In order to have a conversation, you find common ground.
When a girl says she likes electronic music, you don't start judging her for not knowing the specific wiring of the brand of sub woofer you like, you say "oh wow me too, who is your favourite artist?"
Get out of your comfort zone a little, and don't be so self centered.
Not everyone is a huge nerd about WW2 tanks or some shit like that, like I said, most people are bored by that.
>>
>>20120282
>"oh wow me too, who is your favourite artist?"
But that's what I was talking about, it's just scratching the surface. It's a subject that can quickly wear out. And it also confirms that girls have no real interests. I mean why is it so hard to find a girl that'd also like to discuss those things more deeply?
>>
>>20120282
He is right though, girls never do anything out of genuine interest, only to show off on instagram.

His fault is trying to make females into male friends. Females are for fucking, males are for friendship. We all want a girl that is hot and is 50% our best friend and 50% our mother but she doesn't exist.
>>
>>20120291
>I mean why is it so hard to find a girl that'd also like to discuss those things more deeply?

Maybe she wants to discuss something else deeply, and she knows you know nothing about those topics, so she doesn't try to force you into a conversation you'll find boring. Ever thought of that?
>>
>>20120303
Yes I have thought of that and I can assure you this is not the case. Do you really think I don't encourage these girls to talk to me about shit? I like learning new stuff. As I mentioned before, there was one girl in my life I found genuinely interesting and she was really passionate about hairdressing. I loved how she told me about it all. I actually got interested in this simply by her talking to me about it. Among other things of course, but hairdressing was her main passion.

>>20120297
Yeah you're right I guess but still, gotta get her to fuck you somehow, right? I mean how can you actually have a long term relationship with a girl you don't talk to?
>>
Girls with genuine hobbies exist, but they are obese or ugly resulting in a life not filled with shallow dates.

Show me a Joann's and I'll show you 5 fat girls who have a b.a. in arts and who really want to show you their pottery/crochet/ukelele/abstract pastel art/artisinal birdhouses.
>>
>>20120314
>Do you really think I don't encourage these girls to talk to me about shit?

This is not on you. People just don't dig deep with strangers. You say talking guns and cars works with men. Does it work with ALL men or does it work with the dudes that go to the places you go and do the shit you do?

Basically, have you ever bored a man talking about your interests?
>>
>>20120325
>Does it work with ALL men or does it work with the dudes that go to the places you go and do the shit you do?
All men. In fact, it's how I connect with other guys. Or how guys connect with guys in general. It's how you go from strangers to acquaintances and then to friends.

>Basically, have you ever bored a man talking about your interests?
Not really. I don't think I did. I could always easily carry a conversation with a guy by finding *some* subject we have in common. Not so with girls.
>>
>>20120332
>Not really. I don't think I did.
>All men.

Bullshit. Are you really telling me you've never met a guy that said "I like cars" but was unable to keep up with you on the conversation?
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I don't have anxiety talking to girls I don't like, but get nervous with ones I do. To the point where last week my qt co-worker came up to me and first asked how I was doing. I said I was tired from last night, started dipping and then she still asked "Oh what was last night?" And I just said I went out. I really did tbf (raved with a friend) but I realize I LITERALLY SWERVED a girl I like because I was too scared of saying something stupid. How do I harness my way of speaking and making friends with girls I don't like, to girls I do want to date? My friend said I'm basically a pussy and need to be more comfortable in my own skin.
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>>20120343
I have met such guys, but they were totally interested in my autistic tirades about details and wanted to carry the conversation in one way or another.
>>
>>20120343
>>20120353
Wait, no. Scratch that. I thought you're talking about guys in general, I didn't notice you said "guys that said they like cars". Guys that like cars are rather deeply into it.
>>
>>20120353

I can't reach you. You are convinced men are just a different species. I mean, hell, maybe you are on the edge of the bell curve and you have never bored a guy in your life. Unlikely, but not impossible.

You are a marvel of probability. I can understand how that can fuck your head up when it comes to gender relations. You just need to see you are a cosmic happening and that sadly, we can't help you. You defy probability.
>>
>>20120360
Anon, I'm just describing it all based on my experiences with talking to LOTS of girls. I mean lots. Different environments, different ages, different everything. I'm not saying there aren't interesting girls. There are of course. But a solid most aren't, and those that are, are not interested in me.
>>
>>20120370
>those that are, are not interested in me.

The fact that interesting people don't like you, well, I guess you can understand what it means.
>>
>>20120374
No. I don't understand what that means.
>>
>>20120380

You are smart, take a guess.

You say there are interesting girls, but they are not into you. You complain about trying to talk to girls and finding them boring. Do the math. Why do you only get a shot with the boring ones?
>>
>>20120407
>Why do you only get a shot with the boring ones?
Because the cool ones are taken, or if they're not, they just don't find my face attractive enough. Or the fact that I'm a manlet.
>>
>>20120421
So the idea that you might not be as cool as you think you are simply doesn't enter your mind.
>>
I’m really struggling to get over a girl, but I don’t think it’s entirely because of the girl herself. We were never actually together and only dated for a while, but she broke it off with me as she moved away (she left it open to the possibility of talking again, and even said I could talk to her any time I wanted, which is annoying, because I’m trying to get over her and don’t see how that could help). But I think the main reason I’m struggling to get over her is because I got used to the idea of having a gf and spending time with someone of the opposite gender that I genuinely liked.

I think the fact that I have no one else to think about in the time since is a big reason I can’t get over her, and at the same time I also don’t find it easy to meet new people, for various reasons. Does anyone have any thoughts on this, particularly the idea of getting hung up on someone mostly because there’s no one else?
>>
>>20120421

And it comes out, it always does.

>the fact that I'm a manlet.

It cannot possibly be that you are a bitter, boring person, no Godness me! It can only mean that women are superficial bitches that won't give you a chance.

You don't need to look in the mirror, you need to look inside yourself.
>>
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To the guys here: if your dating history has been nothing but tattooed, side-cut/under-cut girls with pink/green/blue/bright red dyed hair, what could your reason be going for an average looking office girl that doesn't even do anal?
>>
girls:
1. a guy is on the dance floor alone - a chance or a threat?
2. you grind a guy on the dance floor without saying a word to him beforehand. in your fantasies, what does the guy say or do next?
>>
>>20120491
Man whore who wants to settle down
>>
>>20120491
Concert girls are fun but would you really wasn't to marry one? Think about who is going to mother you children. Clerk girls are stable.

Ive personally settled for a fat, plain secretary because she has a level head for thrift and skill at cooking.
>>
>>20120499
>>20120509

Did you actually even find them attractive in the first place, the plainer looking girls? Could you or do you love them? Or is it really all about settling down? Because fuck that, I don't want to be someone's last choice.
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>>20120520
Tashiro argues that romantic loce consists of liking and lust. You cpild never settle down with someone you don't deeply like (and have it work) much like it would be irrational to have a fling with someone you feel no lust for.

Good news, you don't have to be particularly attracted to someone to make them quiver and beg for mercy in the sack.

>last choice
Kek. Don't worry, there are choices below you. Three always are. You're his top choice for "liking", and he evaluates liking as more important than lust. Is that a crime?
>>
>>20119916
The person seems like someone fun for at least couple of minutes. It's not like every single of the dudes wants to bang her (is this even a female? I saw more convincing trannies)

>>20119953
It's kinda cute and something to poke fun at.

>>20120040
>not liking the best phone available
Shit taste detected.

>>20120095
In a very descriptive way where it's more of an adjective and it's generally rare. Only brainless kids use the terms unironically when talking about humans.

>>20120255
>she confronted me
And that point you should've told her what you wrote here. You was an immature butthurt piece of shit, she's right to be pissed and you won't sink so low again.

>>20120491
Variety.
>>
>>20120520
not op but both have their places, flamboyant girls tend to say and do things which every horny guy wants to hear in their dirty fantasies, but relationships are hard because what you find under tend to be personality disorders

"plain" girls are more like kinder eggs where their shyness tends to make it hard to asses beforehand what kind of personalities they have, e.g. you don't know what you get before you've already invested. and as you know, everybody hates to waste time.

I wouldn't care a flying shit if you don't want to do anal -- stick a toothbrush to the guys ass and make him cum and ask him if he likes the feeling after.
>>
>>20120491
Because Im tired of fucking thots and want to be with a real woman that has over 100 iq
>>
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>have to write a Master's thesis with this top tier 9/10 university professor, problem is she's treating me like some idiot during the year.
>comes presentation day, be worried about getting rekt
>tells me my thesis is really researched and that it's great work
>couple of days later receive a mail from her saying how she's delighted about what we exchanged, that she took much pleasure reading my work and that I shouldn't hesitate to contact her about work and my future
I don't know how to feel about all this, is she sincere or is she just fucking with me? Should I actually keep contact with her?
>>
>>20120545
I don't think i can just apologise. I think i actively damaged her career with my actions. No apology can fix that.

It's so weird seeing the person you thought that loved you actively despise you. Never felt that before.
>>
>>20120613
But there really isn't anything you can do to make it up, mate.
>>
There's this girl I like. She's probably completely neutral towards me. Anyway we go to a Catholic group together and Catholics LOVE to gossip. Also Catholics seem to talk trash about guys who try to date girls in their Catholic groups and fail (which is stupid because most Catholics end up in relationships within their Catholic groups).
So should I try to ask her out and not care about what people say? (of course being rejected by her as well is a big possibility) Or should I try something else?
>>
>>20120668
I know. This whole exchange made me feel like absolute shit desu. Right when i was getting my confidence up from the last breakup, im demolished now. I feel like the reason i fail with women so much is because im a shitty person who cannot deal with rejection at all. If i was a muslim nigger i would throw acid on women and shit, im sure of it.

So much for self improvement, i guess i can't fix me being a cunt.
>>
>>20120689
Self awareness is a decent start. It's a slow, step by step journey and especially hard if you're older and used to reacting in a certain way - now it's up to you to use it as a teaching moment to at least prevent being a cunt in the future.
>>
>insecure with masculinity - the thread
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>>20120767
I think it's based on my anxiety of being lonely, desu. Ιm 30 and i had my first gf 25, and all i thought in our 3 year relationship was 'yeah at last im normal now ' even though i wasn't very happy. And then i move here and fuck 2 more women in 2 years and it's the same thing, i'm anxious about being lonely because now i also have to deal with my friends getting married and starting families and i feel i'll be left behind, so i cannot handle breaking up and rejection, all this anxiety is becoming toxic behaviour like stalking and anger.

Any ideas how to deal with this?
>>
>>20120673
I learned that if you like a girl you should always try to spend time with her and ask her out early
But a rejection might also hurt you if you two are a part of a certain group so you will have to weigh the options and ask yourself

Is going out with her worth the risk of getting shit talked behind your back? If you're confident enough, you'll automatically know the answer. If not, you might have bigger problems than whether to ask some girl out or not.
>>
Asking guys but I'm a guy:
I notice that I smell a lot like semen lately. How do I stop this? I shower regularly and clean my penis and stuff. Is it just a smell I smell myself or if I can smell it it means other people can too? I mostly smell it when I'm sitting.
>>
>>20120806
Seems like you did all you could, but its not working. I guess you have to stop masturbating.
>>
>>20120798
Thanks. Well it's weird because I've noticed people only talk shit in these groups when they say stuff like "some guy asked X out, who does he think he is". I mean they only talk trash when the guy was rejected. Nobody seems to talk trash when the guy succeeds and ends up dating the girl. Idk why these Catholics are like this, I've been hanging out with Catholics for 4 years now.
I wouldn't mind anything at all if I end up dating her, but you are right, if she rejects me it would make going to the group kind of awkward. I'm not super into this group desu but the problem is in my town all young Catholics seem to know each other so that would make it kind of awkward when I go to another group or another church and friends of the girl are there, if I do ask her out and get rejected.
You are right that asking out early seems like it's always the best way to go.
>>
>>20120816
Ah so it's related to masturbating then. Thanks, I'll try that.
>>
Went out with a girl I met through a mutual friend for a few weeks, we hooked up a few times.
Things were fun and we enjoyed spending time together but it never really developed into a relationship.
We simply allowed it die out and didn't really try to keep it going since neither one of us was really looking for a serious thing.
I feel like this could still be a fun friendship even without making out and sex and doesn't really bother me if she starts seeing other people, should I try to form a friendship or not?
>>
>>20120445

Can someone help with this please? Trying to process these emotions
>>
>girl from my uni post instagram story, on tuesday
>been eyeing her for a while, slide in her dms
>we start talking
>later that day she's with a gay friend of mine because they're in a club together
>she asks him about me
>he tells her good things apparently
>ask her if she wanted to spend some time together
>we go to a garden to talk, yesterday
>tells me she has a gift for prediction and that when I asked to follow she got a feeling I was gonna message her someday
>she starts rolling a joint, apologizes, and tells me she has fibromyalgia and that it helps with the pain
>tells me she was abused by her dad
>tells me she broke up with her boyfriend 4months ago and that she's not looking for a serious relationship
>tells me she loves sex
>when it comes time for her class to start I walk her to the room
>she introduces me to two of her friends
>we say our goodbyes
>keep texting, but I notice she's slightly less enthusiastic, asking less questions, etc.
>it's her birthday today, so I asked her what she wanted
>she tells me she loves white roses
>pick a white rose from my garden and take it to uni
>she's late to class in the morning, so we're together for like 5 mins
>I ask her to close her eyes, go behind her, put my hand on her waist, hold the rose in front of her and tell her to open her eyes
>she sees the rose and blushes
>give her a kiss on the cheek and tell her to go to class
>posts 2 IG stories, both prominently feature the rose
>at lunch time I text her asking when we can be together again
>hasn't replied until now, but has posted an IG story of her hving lunch with her mom

Ever since we went out yesterday that I can't stop thinking about her. And I know I'm probably making a huge mistake, because she's a weed smoker nympho who was abused by her dad, and yet I feel something for her I can't explain because she's just so sweet. So my question is, should I just flat out tell her I like her and say that if she doesn't feel the same we can just go our separate ways?
>>
>>20120445
At least this moved away man. I'm this guy: >>20120255
And that girl was living next door to me and we worked together. I saw her literally every day. You can absolutely do this, i did it.

What you need to do is not give time to yourself to think. Always be doing something. Don't stay in the house. Work out like a madman, be tired so you can sleep. Wake up early. Make sure your house, yourself, everything about you is impecable. Don't expect anything from it, just do it. Find something you could never do and try it. I learned how to ride a bike. I could not ride a bike until 30 years old, i bought one and learned. It really helped my confidence.

Don't talk to her again. Block her from everything.
>>
>>20120174
No, just accept that you have been ghosted, if you want you can hope that she will come around, just know that she probably had 3 chad dicks in her in the meantime, if she messages you again at all (which is unlikely).
If you message her again now that she is ignoring you, you will come off as a desperate beta cuck, destroying even that sliver of a chance.
Your call, but the only way to come out of this with your pride intact is to completely ignore her, or even better unmatch.
>>
>>20120790
I always hate the whole "fragile masculinity" thing. Femininity is not earned or maintained, at least not the same way. To "be a man" you have to do a lot of shit, and you have to work hard at it. It's like saying "fragile muscles" when someone asks about working out. Like I'm sorry, masculinity is just something you have to cultivate and maintain, of course guys are going to be on the look out for their own weak points.
And before I'm accused of hypocrisy, I'll be the first to admit I'm not very masculine, and I'm OK with that, but I still understand why it's something other guys think about.
>>
>>20120944
Damn dude you just ate the whole bait.
>>
>>20120950
I know. It just triggered me.
>>
>>20120944
You don't even get what people mean with fragile masculinity and still got triggered. The only saving grace is your understanding that you are not very masculine.
>>
>>20120944
>>20120954
>It just triggered me.

That's toxic masculinity for you. Don't feed the idea that masculinity is something to earn. By definition anything done by men is masculine, so, you do you and don't keep comparing yourself to others.
>>
>>20120955
Well then please inform me of what people do mean, because I'm genuinely curious.
>>
>>20120958
>Don't feed the idea that masculinity is something to earn. By definition anything done by men is masculine, so, you do you and don't keep comparing yourself to others.
Miss me with that gay shit. Masculinity absolutely is something earned, and it doesn't just encompass anything a man does. It's fine for a man to feminine, and he's no less of a man if he is, in fact I would argue there are times when it's better, but he's not masculine simply for having a dick.
>>
>>20120980

You would be much happier if you didn't hold yourself to imaginary standards like this.

What is being a man to you? Is it getting mad at people on the internet an exploding like you did earlier?

This clearly makes you miserable, but you defend it instead of trying to deal with it. You are trapping yourself.
>>
>>20120980
>but he's not masculine simply for having a dick.
I bet you're the kind of guy that says traps aren't gay.
>>
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>>20119392
how do I make girls like me on the internet, they keep blocking me lol. I think I'm pretty witty, pretty well-assimilated in my beliefs... I think im attractive too but I dont want to sound self absorbed just delineating myself from the rest of 4chan as I should... Any girls want to let me message them on discord I'll send u compliments and shit and you give me feedback or something...
>>
>>20120959
It's usually given in the context. If you fail to get it, you either don't really care, so no explanation will do or actively or never actually encountered it.

Also where the fuck did you get the idea that anyone needs to do anything to maintain it? It's just a fucking attitude that includes certain traits. If you are masculine, you don't need to do anything more to stay masculine than some faggot who is pessimistic or someone with a victim mentality.
>>
>>20121000
>I'll send u compliments
In which context?
>>
>>20120988
If my earlier post seemed like I was exploding or anything more than annoyed, that was not my intention. My issue is with people insulting men who hold themselves to these standards, as if they're somehow wrong for wanting to be masculine.
I personally don't feel the need to be more masculine than I am, but I don't see anything wrong with guys who feel differently.
Why are you defending the idea that men should be masculine?

>>20120989
Traps are 100% gay, not that there's anything wrong with that.
>>
I know this gets asked a lot but I never see an actual answer. How do I flirt? What counts as flirting?
>>
>>20120958
shut the fuck up u fucking half developed nitwit masculinity is not innate that's what differentiates it from femininity in the first place this is basic psychology male identity is the abrogation of the sensual self in exchange for an externally-lived, performative self... you leave a boy without any masculine influence in his life and he'll grow into what women hate the most, an awkward r9k-type loser... stupid fucking whores schopenhauer was right when he said women remain children their entire lives they cant possibly understand the hardship of being a man it's more than just the struggles of the flesh it's the struggle of the growth/development against decay/arrested development in the psychic sphere.
>>
>>20121033
>Why are you defending the idea that men should be masculine?

I'm saying the opposite, that we don't need to worry about being masculine or not.
>>
>>20121020
Well I mean, it's not like the post had any context to it and they didn't actually say fragile masculinity, I did. So I guess maybe I was misusing it, but I think what I meant was clear.
>>
>>20121048
Pretty much. The second you worry about being masculine, you're not.
>>
>>20121047

Another example of a well-adjusted citizen, I see.

>>20121033

Read what the dude above wrote, that's how you sound in your triggered post. Is that a good look to you?
>>
>>20121040

It's having fun and showing interest. What that means varies in the infinite possibilities of age, country, activity, etc. that can be applied to two or more people flirting with each other.
>>
>>20121061
I see, it's just that I noticed that several times I've seen people ask guys and girls I know if they are boyfriend and girlfriend because of the way they act around each other when they are actually just friends. But when people have seen me having a good time with girls I like they have asked us if we were literally brother and sister.
I guess Idk how to show interest in someone.
>>
>>20121048
Then why did you say that everything a man does is automatically masculine? My point, which I may not have made clear, was that men can be masculine or feminine, and that there's nothing wrong with men who want to be more masculine.
>>
>>20121075
>I guess Idk how to show interest in someone.

Good luck. The first few times you try it will be awkward and it can lead to misunderstanding and shit, but hell, that's the only way to learn

Also, worry less about what others say and focus on whether you can have a good time with a girl a girl and move things forward.
>>
>>20121080
>there's nothing wrong with men who want to be more masculine
Sure, just it won't go any more successful than someone wanting to be "more cool"
>>
>>20121080

I asked you what "masculine" is and you never answered. I'm just saying that you don't need to worry about being "masculine", you do you.

Don't look for validation outside, find it inside.
>>
>>20121089
I see, I'm just worried that I thought I should know by now since I'm 25. Idk the difference between how guy friends act around girls and how guys should act around girls when they are interested in them.
>>
>>20121115
> I'm just worried that I thought I should know by now since I'm 25.

You don't learn by aging, you learn by doing.
>>
>>20121123
That's the thing, Idk what to *do* exactly, that's my point. Every time I asked someone out they acted surprised af.
>>
>>20121129
>Every time I asked someone out they acted surprised af.

Do you show interest first? Or do you ask them out of the blue?
>>
>>20121055
shut the fuck up you deserve to be raped and killed dumb whore responding to my post with incredulity like a true halfwit cause you as a dumbass woman operate on the immediacy of aesthetics, of language and how it reflects personality... you dont care about right or wrong or the viability of concepts dumb whore using me as an example shut your mouth.
>>
>>20121134
>Do you show interest first?
But why do you keep missing my point? I don't know how to show interest. I mean yeah sure I do show interest in my own way but apparently I'm doing it wrong. I don't ask out of the blue but I guess I didn't show interest properly.
>>
>>20121055
That guy is labouring under the delusion that men should be masculine. I should probably have put more emphasis on the fact that masculinity is optional in my first post, so I see your point, but I still disagree.
>>
>>20121137
Very well adjusted indeed.
>>
>>20121142
>I mean yeah sure I do show interest in my own way

So you did show interest! It wasn't such a hard question, now was it? Ok, next step: How did you show interest?
>>
>>20121149
It doesn't matter if I showed interest if I didn't do it in the way any average person would take it as showing interest though.
I make eye contact and all that, if she touches my hair or arm or stuff like that I then start to do the same to her (not in a robotic way of course). I compliment them, sometimes about their looks, otherwise about their clothes or their style, or about something they do, for example if I'm interested in what they are studying or their hobbies. I show that I'm interested in the stuff they do. If we have common interests like books or stuff like that I point it out. I also point out that I enjoy hanging out with them.
>>
>>20121163

Do you think they have fun with you?
>>
>>20121171
If they smile and laugh I assume they do.
>>
>>20121177

Where did you meet them? How do you ask them out?

Here's the thing, you think they are interested, but they don't go out with you. Do you have any idea why?
>>
>>20121092
I agree, but I think it's important to care about more than being successful.

>>20121095
Oops. You're right.
Honestly, I couldn't really pin down a precise list of traits that define masculinity any more than I could define beauty.
I know that sounds like I'm dodging the question, but I literally don't think I have the vocabulary to describe it.

>>20121148
At this point I think he's just trolling.
>>
>>20121181
I met most through hanging out with mutual friends. I ask them out by just suggesting we meet and have coffee or drinks some day, or go have a pizza together, or go see some movie together if we are both interested in it. Always got rejected except for one time but when we did meet it was clear she didn't want it to be a date.
>you think they are interested, but they don't go out with you. Do you have any idea why?
I have no clue why. I also have no clue why some of them then go out with some guy whom they didn't seem to have any chemistry with.
>>
>>20121187
>know that sounds like I'm dodging the question, but I literally don't think I have the vocabulary to describe it.

And that's why chasing such a ghost is meaningless. If you can't define it, you can't say what is earned or not, what it means, you can't say anything about it.

Vague concepts like that are just a trick to keep you trapped, with rules you don't understand. That's why you have to fuck the idea of masculinity and just be yourself.
>>
>>20121195
>I ask them out

How soon?
>>
>>20121206
I asked a girl from college out after talking to her like 3 or 4 times.
Other girls I've asked them out after meeting them several times in our friend groups, I guess after a month or after a few months of knowing them.
>>
>>20121220

Have you ever asked someone out even though they were dating someone else (because you didn't know, of course)?
>>
>>20121220
>>20121225

Or a lesbian. Have you ever accidentally asked a lesbian out?
>>
>>20121225
I think all the girls I've asked out were single then.
>>
Having had gay sex once or twice isn't a dealbreaker is it?
>>
>>20121228
Yes but only once. I can tell the others aren't lesbians because I've seen them dating other guys before or after I asked them out.
>>
Tinder match stopped replying after I asked for her snapchat last night, she seemed pretty interested beforehand, full paragraph answers and all that. I think I might have been too quick.

Is there a followup message that could potentially revive the convo? Like "Hey I probably should have got to know you better more before asking personal info haha, so do you have/do/like *some question*?"
>>
>>20121230
>>20121234

>I can tell the others aren't lesbians

That's not the point. The point is that you don't know if they are available or even interested in your gender before trying to ask them out.

We are not talking about hooking up at a party. We are talking about waiting too much for that sort of deal, and too little for a serious deal.

What do you want? A hook-up or a relationship? the first step to show interest is to define what you are interested in.
>>
>>20121232
lol I was gonna ask this as well
If you are the one who had gay sex why do you need to tell this to the person you want to date?
(since you said gay sex and asked if it's a dealbreaker I assumed you are a guy and want to date a girl)
Maybe you could try to date someone who's bisexual, they would be more likely to understand.
>>
>>20121204
Man we're so close to being on the same page here.
I don't have to be able to precisely define something to know if it's earned or not. I couldn't precisely define "success" to know that it has to be earned to be "true" success. I also don't have to precisely define beauty to know that it (generally) has to do with a certain kind of uniformity or consistency of something's features.

>That's why you have to fuck the idea of masculinity and just be yourself.
I don't think you HAVE to, but you can if you want.
>>
What do you women do after you get off work?
Like typical 4PM to 11PM daily stuff
>>
>>20121245
What do you mean? I should always ask them if they are single before asking them out? It was quite clear that most of these girls were heterosexual and single when I asked them out.
I want a relationship, not a hook up, though I wouldn't mind one now.
>We are talking about waiting too much for that sort of deal, and too little for a serious deal.
What do you mean? that even when I wait a long time I'm still asking too soon? That I shouldn't ask girls out if what I want is a relationship and just wait until a relationship forms out of a friendship or something like that?
>>
>>20121187
trolling alright just ignore what I said about aesthetics n language lol
>>
>>20121259
Based on my (human female) friend:
>cook a meal
>hang with her bf
>maybe watch some series
>sleep
>>
>>20121273
>tfw you realize this is all there is to life, unironically
>>
>>20121261
>I want a relationship, not a hook up, though I wouldn't mind one now.

Pick one. It's fine to try different thing in different places and with different people, but you have to know what you are going for when you actually make a move.

>What do you mean? that even when I wait a long time I'm still asking too soon?

A month is not a long time for a relationship, man.

I'll give you an example. A friend of mine asks out girls as soon as he can. And then he gets mad when they think of the relationship as a hook up and doesn't take it as seriously as he does. But let me ask you something, what kind of girl goes out with a stranger? One that's looking to hook up!

If you want a relationship, then it should be impossible for you to ask out a lesbian or a girl that's taken. Impossible, because you can't commit to a relationship with a stranger.

If you want to hook up, then you can't wait so long to make a move.

A month is only long for a hook up, but it's not enough for a realtionship.
>>
>>20121276
There are always actual hobbies.

I have no fucking idea how someone as smart and ambitious as her can really stand that stuff tbqh.
>>
>>20121278
Like I said I never ask out girls that are taken or lesbians. The only time I asked a girl out was in high school. Every other girl was 100% guaranteed to be single and straight.
So if I want a relationship, should I first become friends with the girl? Isn't that just what leads people to the friendzone? I thought guys who want relationships simply ask girls out, get to know them, go out on dates, and that becomes a relationship. I don't think people actually wait long before asking someone out just because they want a relationship. And I think many people don't hook up asap just because the guy asked them out kind of soon, many relationships I know seemed to start by just going on dates.
I know I'm the one asking for advice but what you say sounds weird.
>>
>>20121299
>The only time I asked a girl out was in high school.
I mean the only time I asked a girl out who was a lesbian**
>>
>>20121299
>I know I'm the one asking for advice but what you say sounds weird.

You have tried your method for a while and it doesn't work. Care to try mine?

Decide what you want and work towards it. Hook up at a bar or some shit. Fine, but do it swiftly. Get to know someone and find out what they want, then develop a relationship when that person is open to one.

Try it. Try to decide what you want before acting next time.
>>
>>20121327
But that's the thing. I KNOW what I want. And you are being very vague with your advice.
>then develop a relationship when that person is open to one
How do I know? do I go around asking women if they want a relationship? and if they do then how exactly do I "develop" the relationship?
>>
>>20121336
>I KNOW what I want.

What do you want? Don't add "I wouldn't mind a hook up" at the end. Give me a clear, unambiguous answer as to what you want.
>>
>>20121349
I want a relationship. The "I wouldn't mind a hook up" thing was meant to be ironic as in "I'd take anything now if I keep failing" but that's not really the case. I want someone with whom I can spend hopefully the rest of my life with.
I guess one of the problems that come with this is that I don't ask out that many girls because I actually try to get to know them before asking them out, at least enough to see they are fun to hang out with.
>>
>>20121374
>I don't ask out that many girls because I actually try to get to know them before asking them out

Clearly you don't get to know them enough, none of them were into you and yet you thought they were.

So you want a relationship. Awesome. Do you ever talk about that? Do you tell people that's what you want? Do you talk to these women to see if that's what they want? And no, dipshit, you don't need to make a form for them to complete and sign. Just talk about it, don't interrogate them. A woman that doesn't even want to talk about whether she wants a relationship or not will not want a relationship with you.

So take longer than a month next time and make sure to bring the topic and see what they think before trying anything. Can you do it for once and see if it goes better?
>>
>>20121387
>dipshit
Your advice sounds retarded, no offense. Sure yeah I'll go around telling everyone that I want a relationship and make a survey on what women also want a relationship
>>
>>20121397
If you have a normal conversation with someone, it's not that unusual or rare to touch the relationshit subject.
>>
>>20121397

Not a survey, that's the point. Just be open about what you think. If you are the kind of dude that avoids group talk about relationships (and I know you are) then it's doubly creepy when you randomly ask a girl out.
>>
Guys, has a boss ever called you weak even as banter? What is the best response?
>>
>>20121401
If people talked about that so openly and women just told "hey btw I want a relationship" then we wouldn't need this thread or half this board.
>>20121403
Group talk about relationships is usually about people who already are in relationships
>>
What advice would you give for dating a women with daddy issues? She's 33, i'm 28. She knows she has them and thinks it's quirky.
>>
>>20121408
The people who do need this shit are a few steps behind actually having normal conversations with others.
>>
>>20121408

>Group talk about relationships is usually about people who already are in relationships

In other words, you don't participate, just as predicted.
>>
How do you know if you're boring?

I've been going on dates with 3 girls I met on Tinder, been on about 4 dates with each one. They aren't you're typical instagram/clubbing/snapchat girls but rather ones who like going to museums and exhibitions. On the actual dates we talk non-stop and there's never any silence, all 3 of them never check their phone as well and we'll talk for hours. However when it comes to talk on WhatsApp it takes 2 days minimum to get a reply, unless it's the day of the date and they're telling me when they're ready. Am I just boring or do girls usually take this long to reply?
>>
>>20121438

Sounds like you are a bad texter but do fine in person. Chill, it's not that big a deal
>>
Does a girl working the counter giving me another hot dog for free and cheerily saying "Oh it's on me" when I go to pay count as "meaningless gesture" or was it likely a flirt like everyone with me said it was
>>
>>20121027
like I'll call you pretty and smart and shit like that.
>>
>>20121492
In what context.
>>
>>20121505
tf you mean in what context you broken ass record this some serial killer shit fr.
>>
>>20121524
Sure, sure. So, context. What about it?
>>
>>20121524

Do you know what "context" means? You didn't answer that in the first post, you just told us what you not, not the context of your actions.
>>
>>20121536
There is no context I'll DM you messages when I feel like it I dont care if you reply as long as your female and reading what I type nothing else matters
>>
How do you move on from someone you thought was the one?
>>
>>20121558

And that's the reason they don't like it. You don't care about anything and write like a creepy serial killer.
>>
>>20119434
You’re damaged goods
>>
>>20121558
Well, there you go. You're just some horny fuck who annoys people and doesn't even have the decency to treat them like people. They react by blocking you.
>>
>>20121457
So taking a few days to reply isn't a normal thing? When they do reply it's usually long messages and I send the same. Always make sure to ask a question so they've got a reason to reply.
>>
>>20121570
>>20121577
alright whatever my intention in saying it like that was so I dont come off creepy lol... I got all my heart to give really its just nobody wants it, im misunderstood by everyone I come in contact with
>>
>>20121609

Everyone is different. Some people text more than others. But if most people don't text you, then yeah, it sounds like your text game is not that good.
>>
>>20121613
>im misunderstood by everyone I come in contact with

>when I feel like it I dont care if you reply as long as your female and reading what I type nothing else matters

Oh, they understand you. That's why they don't want anything to do with you.
>>
>>20121609
Not a female but usually I take my time too, unless the person wrote something that needs a reply now or I have nothing better to do. If you talk in walls of texts, it's given that it takes even more effort, so more time to respond.

What kind of questions do you ask?
>>
>>20121616
thats kinda mean lol got me all insecure now...
>>
is this thread still alive lol... the resident females have bullied me into a catatonic state I could use some distraction.
>>
Ladies would you ever have feelings for a male friend who use to have feelings for you and you rejected him.
Also how does it feel when a guy who liked you no longer likes you?

I got over a girl who rejected me recently and think she knows, it seems to bother her but I can't tell.
>>
>>20121711
>would you ever have feelings for a male friend who use to have feelings for you and you rejected him
Yes it happens, maybe not on short time but does happen

>how does it feel when a guy who liked you no longer likes you?
it really sucks because you think deep down he must still have some feelings but he has not.
Also you know he will definitely not make a move on you even if he still likes you because you fucking rejected him once
>>
>>20121711
>Ladies would you ever have feelings for a male friend who use to have feelings for you and you rejected him.
It's never happened to me.
>Also how does it feel when a guy who liked you no longer likes you?
I don't care that much, if I don't like him. If I do, I just wonder if I came across as too weird, and obsess over that until I move on.
>>
I've being feeling lost and low recently and it's affecting my relationship with people around me. Either I feel I'm bringing people down or that I'm getting dependent on them, so I just isolate myself.
Advice on what I can do? Should I talk about it with them or keep on trying to get through all this alone?
>>
i just matched with a friend of my little sister on tinder. the friend is cute, she's been flirty with me when she's visited us.

i told her ill offer her a coffee if ill hear about this from my sister. its little past midnight, for context.

most of my friends on hand have said this is a mistake (to match an initiate), but please tell my drunken mind why
>>
>>20122048
Do it.
>>
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Women:
So my gf broke up with me a little over a month ago. She deleted me from Facebook the next day. Can't say we ever fought in the relationship, but we were going out for 7 months (known each other for 13 years). I went No Contact immediately after she broke up with me.

Lately she's been viewing my snapchat stories(she obviously knows that I can see her). Why do exes do this?
>>
>>20122049
i havent ever been in a relationship, so any idea why fucking your sister's friend is considered bad practice? obviously im horny as fuck right now and cant stop to think all the fantasies.
>>
Girl will never outright tell me no about anything. Has purposly stayed sitting next to me in uni. Still has feelings for ex she's broken up with. Im crushing on her super hard but she says she can't read me. Family says she's confused about her own feelings and I should run because i don't need extra baggage. Thoughts?
>>
>>20122071
Obviously if it goes poorly you have to deal with your sister all the time. And if you're a freak in the sack your sis is sure to learn about it.
>>
are they're any mommies for this little
>>
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Why the fuck does she sometimes see me and then immediately turn her head away and look busy? Sometimes she will literally yell my name across campus and talk to me but sometimes she just pretends I don't exist. I want to fucking kill myself when she does this
>>
>>20122099
enjoys the attention of stringing you along

tell her to stop fucking with you
>>
>>20122102
She acts really awkward in conversation and flirts though. She talks normally with other people but when she's with me she fucks up her words and teases me like she likes me. She makes no fucking sense
>>
>>20121566
Realizing they weren’t the one.
>>
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Why the fuck does my ex decide to tell me one day that she regrets breaking up and misses me after 2 years. Then a month later decides to message me to hang out, but doesn't.
>>
I've spent nearly 2 hours fucking my current woman, and I get very close to getting her to a bigtime orgasm, but I just keep teetering on the edge before I lose it. Any ladies got any advice? I was thinking she needs more clit stimulation but she only gets real close when we're doing legs-up missionary and im slamming in on top of her, so that kind of rules out my hand.

Im already well endowed 7.5 long (8 on a good day) 6.25 around (6.5 on a good day)
>>
>>20122111
>>20122099
Did you bang her yet?
>>
>>20120491
Anal isn't even the best part of sex wtf, the best part of sex is biting, scratching, slapping and pounding her into unconsciousness with your dick.
>>
>>20122219
We went on a date and it sucked because we were both nervous. Then she invited me to her room to drink and like a retard I did nothing, so she probably thinks I have autism
>>
>>20122251
>Then she invited me to her room to drink and like a retard I did nothing, so she probably thinks I have autism

A girl inviting you up to her room means "make out with me in a vulgar way until I grab your dick then fuck me"

Bit her neck and shoulders and maybe her tummy/hips then you'll see it in her face that she wants the D. If you're nerv ous now think about how bad it'll be if you're a 25 year old virgin.
>>
>>20122275
I mean I'm not virgin but I realize how much of a fuckup that was. She's been different ever since that night and I know it's all my fault. I deleted her from my phone a bit after that and months later she started chatting me up like nothing happened. I figure she did that because she likes me? She's still pulling this bs though
>>
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I have been told I'm too passive by my last 2 gfs
On monday I have a date with a girl that wants to be my gf (according to her).
Is a kiss in a first date a big no no?
(she is sexually and emotionally attracted to me apparently)
>>
Should I open up to a girl I like about having had depression (well I still do but I wanna hide that) and the fact that I used to go to therapy? It's a matter that makes me feel ashamed (I know it shouldn't but still) until this girl I have a sort of crush on mentioned today that she finally found a good therapist because she needed one.
Is it a red flag if a guy has or has had problems like depression? Or if a guy opens up in a way that appears weak? I guess the answer is "depends on the girl" but anyway. Thanks
>>
>>20122296
Do you take charge in a fuck or does she like to ride? Is she a tease?

This sounds like shes throwing you a signal and hitting a brick wall because of how you view your sexuality.
>>
>>20122303
>Is a kiss in a first date a big no no?
He'll no it isn't, make her laugh then go in for it. If you're feeling like you wanna fuck bite her neck/shoulders/chin and pull her up against you if shes not resistant to this.

If you're a virgin just remember women like feeling your strength/weight on them so dont be afraid to smack her all up and down her body except face (unless she asks for face)
>>
>>20122311
Yeah she teases the fuck outta me and I stopped teasing her because I felt like I was being too harsh. We've not really been intimate but she touches me a lot and will literally stare at me during conversation. Should I just start being really flirty so she gets the hint I like her? Everytime I suggest to hang out now she always is busy so I assume she's not comfortable around me. She used to be but I fucked it all up
>>
>>20122327
>Yeah she teases the fuck outta me and I stopped teasing her because I felt like I was being too harsh
Can I have an example? %90 of the time being "too harsh" when flirting back and forth is impossible, but autists on here always surprise me.
>>
>>20122323
The relationships i had before where from friends to gf, so it was never this first impression kind of deal
Is know it is her first date/boyfriend, and probably kiss/sex.
I don't wqnt to make her feel uncomfortable, you know
>>
>>20122331
I'd constantly talk shit on her being in the AF (because I was Army) and call her space cadet and soft because the air force is a joke. She works really hard so I felt bad
>>
>>20122349
Going in for a kiss isn't sudden, if shes not comfortable with it she'll let you know, and dont be afraid of rejection. Just make sure the mood is right on both ends.

When a girl agrees to go on a date with you shes looking for a reason to kiss you, your job is to make it.
>>
>>20122354
Does she laugh at it?

Also physically flirt, touch her and shit, grab her, make out.
>>
>>20122370
I don't remember desu. She laughs at a lot of the shit I say now but like I said she sometimes just completely turns her head and walks away when she sees me sometimes. Like today, she was exiting the gym when she saw me, she locked onto her phone and then sat at the entrance for some reason and put her hood up. Why the fuck couldn't she at least wave?
>>
>>20122378
Idk next time you see her in a good mood try to kiss
>>
>>20122386
I literally have no opportunity we're always in a public place on campus
>>
>>20122391
>I literally have no opportunity we're always in a public place on campus

Did I fuckin stutta brotha
>>
Fucking seething right now.

>bring short, pudgy, ugly friend for a contrast wingman in the club
>girls approach me
>the fucker talks to them making them laugh and shit
>completely ignores me
>just pack up and leave

Fucking hell. What are some better ways that I can look approachable?
>>
>>20122349
She was the one who wanted a date desu
>>
>>20122417
Lift weights, buy a hooker to gain some confidence then you won't have to ask

Its almost impossible to catch HIV from vaginal sex and as long as your aren't throwing it in a hole thats covered in sores or warts you're not going to catch anything else serious, and you'll feel much better afterwards. That and a hooker will let you do crazy shit for her own personal enjoyment and you'll have fun.
>>
>>20122417
They probably sensed that you’re kind of an asshole who was just using his friend to try and look better. Can you try and be nice? I’m a woman and I’d rather hang out with a fun ugly dude than his better looking friend with a bad attitude.
>>
>>20122429
The problem is you're non-committal and she very clearly is, being non-decisive is a basedboy move.
>>
>>20122417
How exactly did you expect him to help though? I think having him near you (or any guy for what matters) is something that ironically may have put a higher pressure on you since you automatically assume you are supposed to be better than him and compete with him. I'm no expert but some friends of mine suggested that a female friend I have (actually she came up with the idea) should come with me to a nightclub or bar and be my wingman. So do you have a close female friend? Maybe a female friend is a better idea but idk. Maybe going alone or in a group of 3 or more is even better, you feel less pressure.
>>
>>20122417
>use friend to make yourself look better
>get mad when it backfires
>>
>>20122429
>as I told you before...
lol rude
>>
>>20122433
>>20122437
>>20122440
Yeah well years before I was that pudgy fuck that my better looking friends brought with them. Now I'm fucking ripped, take care of skin and hair, havr better clothes and I still get ignored.
>>
>>20122460
Maybe you should take dancing lessons, girls dig that.
>>
>>20122460
You sound really, really angry and bitter even online and it must come out worse in person. I’m glad you take care of yourself but you should find ways to chill out. If i met you in real life, as a tiny woman, i would probably be scared of you.being scared doesn’t turn women on. Try chilling the fuck out and then see what happens
>>
Can anyone explain what the hell happened to me?

Meet a girl on online dating site, chat a little bit on it and they suggest we continue offsite. Ok thats normal and fine.

She starts talking dirty immediately on snapchat and sends me a topless picture of her. Awesome.

Next day she backpedals 360 degrees and seems not into it anymore.

Now I'm confused as to what I'm dealing with. She's nice but one day she'll send me sexy pictures then the next day she says she wont until I know her for a month.

Its only been a few days and we haven't had a chance to meet up yet.
>>
If i finish a Semester with a girl I likes number but who is still struggling with her own feelings, does it make more sense to not push boundaries? Or to slowly try to work my way under her skin.
>>
Girls, do you like wearing or like the looks of skirts, leggings/long socks, or chokers?
I figure most don't wear them out of convenience but are they even popular just for style?
>>
>>20119392
man im misunderstood, it's not me it's everybody else, nobody gets me nobody understands anything I say they just kick me out from wherever whether it be online or in real life I get kicked out of everything cause nobody wants to deal with me... I've never done anything wrong, I'm not even mean, I wouldn't hurt a fly, it's just nobody wants to deal with me so they throw me out, call me names etc... fucking hate this, hate how god damn muddleheaded everybody is on this rotten fucking planet, content just to hate what they dont understand... hate is enough for them... yall gonna reply to me saying how I'm the problem and blah blah blah, well fuck you too den, nobody gets it, nobody sees things the way I see them and u know as much as I dont want to give anyone an opportunity to call me pretentious it's cause they're fucking stupid, S-T-U-P-I-D, everybody without exception. Okay maybe a handful of exceptions, a minuscule sliver of people at least want to know. Why I act the way I do, say what I say etc... most people are stupid within stupid, too stupid to contemplate their own stupidity. Feel like I'll always be alone cause of this, like if I want others to tolerate me I have to LIE and conceal the truth cause they're too stupid to see their own wrongness no matter what... how do I know. Thing is if I ever met somebody like me, oh, I'd know it, I'd read this very post and wonder what I'm talking about... yeah, some people are born with a natural capacity to appreciate whats above them. Ain't none of those people around me I'm rejected by everyone and everything.
>>
>>20122662
>it's not me it's everybody else
Stopped reading there. You're retarded and incapable of change.
>>
>>20122662
Sorry bud but if nobody likes you then there's nothing wrong with them.
Think about it, would you hang out with someone that you don't like? Stop being annoying.
>>
>>20122520
how did you respond to her sending pics
>>
>>20122693
dont understand you people, doing exactly what ive predicted you doing... calling me retarded, for virtually no reason... your heuristic for doing so is solely in the personal, caught up in projecting your own more or less self-aware qualities. 'Anyone who says everybody else misunderstands is wrong' etc... you wont even begin to consider whether it actually is wrong, whether I'm actually speaking any truth, you only care about these pithy little notions, and its on the backs of those that you get the gall to call me retarded... fucking inbred stunted faggot ass cocksucker you don't deserve to call me names you're a fucking bug under my shoe.
>>
>>20119423
not him but im in the same boat, its not about paying attention, i just dont process the information as quickly so to speak. once it goes in, i have little problem dealing with it (so i wouldnt say im 100% retarded)
>>
>>20119434
>reformed sloot
no such thing kek
>>
is it possible to actually get in a FWB relationship through tinder if you arent really attractive? Not necessarily with someone out of my league but average to above average looking honestly as long as she isnt fat and really basic i would be down
>>
How do I get a wife?
>>
>>20120816
its in your head
>>
>>20122719

Playfully and enthusiastically. Tried not to lay it on too thick though.
>>
>>20122803
so you showered her with praise about how attractive she is and gave her attention and validation and then the next day she ignored you and made an excuse that would let her continue to ignore you but keep your attention just enough so that if she needs more validation for her self esteem she can send you another snap/pic and get you to praise her again when she needs it?

And let me hazard a wild guess that you will make an offer to meet up in person and she will come up with an excuse but not make an effort to reschedule or give you a day or even time frame where she will be available or not "busy" in the near future.

Put yourself in her situation, if there was a girl you were interested in genuinely would you yourself send a pic then give her the cold shoulder and give an excuse that would distance yourself from her?

Sorry shes probably using you, it hurts and you dont deserve it but thats what it sounds like.
>>
>>20122820
Yeah sounds about right actually. You predicted a couple of things as well.

Thanks for the advice.
>>
>>20122826
im sorry man, its shitty but it happens, its not a reflection on you as a person but you deserve someone who shows real interest in you
>>
>>20122842
lol you dont even know if I'm actually worth anyones time. I could be a huge dick, but thats kind.
>>
Girls what do you get from one night stands? I mean, most guys wont go down on you anyway so how do you even reach orgasm? Whats in it for you?
>>
Girls what do you think of a male who vents about his love story on his social media account?
>>
I had a really bad tone when I got chicken with y gf when we got home because the order was wrong and I fell really bad. I had the bad tone and was shocked and I was meaning to direct it to the people at the food place for messing up the order but it was really me messing up saying what I wanted from the place and because of that she thought I was mad at her about it and I feel awful. She was stressed and she started crying and I feel awful. I explained what I meant immediately and that it wasnt directed at her and it was more just shock and she said its alright but I still feel awful when I think about it. This was a few months ago now. I keep wanting to apologize about it which means I've brought it up multiple times since then but I dont want to keep bringing it up. How can I get past it?
>>
I've been dating this super prude girl for about 5 months and today she started talking about having sex, she was super for real because she was fingering herself and everything over the phone. She told me she wanted to wait for marriage and now this. What should I do? I wanted to respect that idea but my sore dick says otherwise
>>
>>20123075
>she started talking about having sex
Whats the problem?
Also
>dating for 5 months
>>
>>20123087
I forgot to mention we're both virgins and was very serious about the until marriage part when she told me about it
>>
>>20123089
Alright but again you said
>she started talking about having sex
So whats the problem? And how old are you two anyway
>>
>>20122802
in your head
>>
>>20123061
god, don't be such a little bitch about it.
your girlfriend has probably forgotten about it that very day.
i mean jesus christ how much of a wimp do you have to be?
>>
>>20122842
Not him but what if nobody ever shows real interest in you?
>>
>>20123097
I guess it was just the post-nut regret talking. It's also pretty scary to think about it. She's 19 and I'm 20. I'm mostly concerned because she's not typically like this at all





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