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Does anyone else have fantasies about being a victim of transphobic violence?

I have these fantasies for example, where I am walking away from a bar when a group of men come up to and corner me. It escalates even though I try to get away and I am easily overpowered and one of them hits me and knocks me down and slams a brick in my face. Before I know it I am on the ground being kicked and stomped on.

A group of LGBT-friendly people come around the corner and stop and chase off the attackers. I am in pain and badly hurt but they comfort me and ask if they can give me a ride home. I tell them I'm scared about going home in case they follow me, so they take me to a nearby coffee shop and buy me a cup of coffee and let me stay the night at their place. We stay up and talk and play video games and after sleeping for a few hours I leave in the morning.
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Another one I have is where I am out walking around downtown with a group of friends. I am the prettiest girl in the group. One of my friends is intoxicated, and as a result of something she does we get stopped by crooked cops. While we are all detained, the cops want to search us, and one of them looks at me and says, "I like this one." He makes me put my hands on the wall and gropes my conetits and feel my tucked and taped penis between my legs while saying things like "don't move or I'll shoot you" in front of my friends while they yell at and insult the cop. After the ordeal is over and they let us go, I run into a coffee shop and curl up in a booth in the corner and start crying while one of my friends chases me in there.
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>>8993267
I have sexual fantasies about being a cis woman and being subjected to sexism, but usually not violence like that.
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I really want a TERF to dominate me
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>>8993267
>>8993287
i am sad
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>>8993501
Why?
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>>8993515
well cause im repressing and just want to be happy, i guess we see things differently

if i got beat up or otherwise discriminated for being trans i would only wish i never forgot that i want to be considered cute etc, so i guess i sorta actively repress the bad things as they happen, so seeing it directly makes me... sad..
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I have a fantasy of strangling a tranny where are you located?
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>>8993523
I don't understand?
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>>8993539
being trans is hugging a teddybear, but your story is telling me i dont have a teddybear, which makes me confused ans lost

if you still dont get it im sorry bit i am not a wordsmith and i tried had with an example anyway...
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>>8993267
>>8993287
Friendship features prominently in both of your fantasies, OP. Is it possible that you simply wish that you had close friends, and that the violent elements are due to the self-loathing common to transgender people. instead of a sincere wish to be a victim of violence?
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>>8993641
OP here. I was thinking maybe its the vulnerability aspect, since vulnerability is more "feminine."

When males daydream about physical conflict, they daydream about kicking ass, so maybe it's like the opposite of that in me.
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FtM here, I feel the same. I think for me it's routed in transphobic exes slapping me about and internalizing stuff they said, so maybe it's different? Idk.
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>>8993267
> transphobic exes slapping me about

This is why trans lesbians are the only true lesbians.
Cis lesbians don't exist. The motivation for a cis "lesbian" is hatred and a desire to dominate something weaker than herself, not any kind of romantic attraction.
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OP, like most transgenders, you want to feel persecuted and have people feel sorry for you. If you want friends, just go out and meet people instead of playing the victim all the time.
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>>8994640
Wow anon you sound bitter af
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>>8994661
Yeah I was raped by a cis lesbian once
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>>8994679
Oh. I'm sorry.
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>>8994679
I'm sure she had a reason.
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>>8993267
>>8993287
>>8993354

This is fucking sick. Is this common? I wonder if this is why so many mental illness types cry transphobia and ruin peoples lives over micro transgressions.
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>>8995270
After a while people will start to ignore them.
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>>8993354
I get that too, but it's usually light stuff
Never quite got why people are into violent shit
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>>8995285
For me, I think it's a symptom of how badly I was abused when I was young. Now I feel like anytime something good happens to me, I need to suffer painfully because I don't deserve anything good. I only deserve to hurt. An extension of the 'This is your fault' method of abuse.

Its not something I enjoy obviously, but its a part of me.
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>>8993267

No, plenty of lgbt phaggots have fantasies of being a victim of violence and all the sympathy and attention that would ensue after.

That's why so many of them fake it these days.
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>>8995270
>cry transphobia and ruin peoples lives over micro transgressions.
You're thinking of cisgender females.
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>>8995400
"I don't deserve anything good. I only deserve to hurt."

Is this what you think at the time when you have these fantasies or is this just something you found afterwards that might explain them?
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>>8993497
This tbhon
I want her to call me words and tell me that's I'm pathetic excuse for a woman
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>>8995285
I'm into violent shit because I was beaten by my mother regularly, bullied in school and generally was treated poorly by everyone.
Well, that's what I think, at least.
Might be the case for many.
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>>8996164
>I was beaten by my mother regularly, bullied in school and generally was treated poorly by everyone.
:( What was everybody so nasty to you for?
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>>8996260
Various reasons, really. My mother hated me, and a shy small kid who can't talk back and bursts into tears easily is a perfect target for bullying. I guess it was fun for them. Some people hated me for no particular reason (some even said "I don't really know why I did stuff like this"). Guess I deserved it.
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>>8996317
> I don't really know why

It's because children behave like baboons. The pack leading sociopath shows dominance by attacking well-chosen targets and the conformists ensure their own safety by joining.
You had the misfortune of finding yourself in a situation you weren't tooled to handle. Don't spite yourself over it.
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Trans violence is a meme like 4 in 5 women are raped in college campuses
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>>8996335
>It's because children behave like baboons
The worst part is that those people were not children, it actually happened with 20+ yo people.
But I guess this can apply to school bullying anyway.
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>>8996317
>My mother hated me
Why? Who were these people?

>Guess I deserved it.
:(
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>>8996353

Then I guess they must have been proles. Either way, to have a living mind is a holy thing and nobody deserves arbitrarily inflicted violence.
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>>8996374
>Why?
I don't really know why. She generally didn't care about me, and I was a burden to her left by my father. Probably that's why.
>Who were these people?
A small group of my "friends". I still occasionally talk to them, because, you know, stockholm syndrome. But I guess that's fine since they admitted their mistake.
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>>8996136
Oh, it's always at the time. It pops into my head anytime something hurtful or painful happens, right at the time, even if I'm still processing wtf happened. It was the analyzing why afterwards that made me come up with the answer.

I still have a BUNCH of repressed memories, so the key to it probably lies in there somewhere.
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>>8996392
What's your relationship with your mother now?

How did they admit their mistake? And what did they actually do?
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>>8996447
Last time I talked to her was like 2 or 3 years ago. I don't even think that she noticed.

>How did they admit their mistake?
2 years after what happened one of them contacted me and said he was sorry for what he did (he was the leader).

>And what did they actually do?
Don't really want to talk about it, sorry. I feel like I've derailed this thread far away already.
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>>8993523
>well cause im repressing and just want to be happy,
;_;
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>>8993267
That is a pretty strange fantasy. But transgender folks are mentally ill by definition, so its not surprising.




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