[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k] [s4s] [vip] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/x/ - Paranormal



Thread archived.
You cannot reply anymore.



What will you be doing on September 23, 2017, to celebrate the return of Jesus Christ so save us from the evil globalists and abortionists?
>>
same story with kalki

but nothing will probably happen
>>
what ever happened to "no man will know the hour" and all that?
>>
File: 1460870759887.jpg (36 KB, 372x720)
36 KB
36 KB JPG
rahowa
>>19585622
jews have to tell you their plans so their "souls' are clean
>>
>>19585631
>>
>>19585592
I'll be riding the FUCK out of that goddamn horse and swinging that sword left AND right.

You'll see me. I'll give /x a shout out.
>>
>>19585664
As if Jesus would let you on his horse. More like you'll be the horse
>>
Nothing will happen and I'll laugh at you fools yet again. So many failed predictions on this board and you think this one will be different? Bahahah
>>
File: erryday.jpg (35 KB, 400x304)
35 KB
35 KB JPG
>10 days left
>it couldn't be more peaceful

Just face it, it's not habbening. It'll be a day like all the rest, not too hot, not too cold, not too sunny, not that rainy either. Everything you believed in was a lie and delusions. New Age, channeled spirits, pleiadeans, secret space programs and whatnot were just a big fat marketing campaign. No one's coming to save you, we're all alone in the universe and the dead stay dead. There's no magic, no ghosts, no prophecies that come true save by coincidence. There are no great, global conspiracies, people really are just as stupid and simple as they seem and are not plotting anything. The end.
>>
File: 1502272879182.gif (3.51 MB, 650x732)
3.51 MB
3.51 MB GIF
>>19585882
Congratulations! This seems a suitable reward.
>>
>>19585882
>"You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies." John 8:44
Get thee behind me. You do the work of your father, the devil. Nice try though.
>>
>>19585999
Is it possible to wake up something sleeping or laying dormant inside you if given the correct amount of tampering.
>>
It's just going to be another nearly imperceptible paradigm shift like on 2012. Normies will be able to say nothing happened, most others will feel something is "off."
>>
>>19585592
i have a dentist appointment anon, think jesus will allow my wisdom teeth to be removed before we enter rapture
>>
I'll be wanking all day until the sperm that would be Jesus' reincarnation is wasted and sticking to my wall
>>
I will be here shitposting about it and laughing at the losers that actually believed this shit.
>>
>>19585882
This. People make this shit up to feel important or so something will happen that will brighten up their boring lives. Its the same shit. Charlatans making up lies and the bored and stupid eat it up like its candy
>>
>>19586074
>implying a virgin autist like yourself could even get laid to have a child in the first place
>>
File: 1505217166922.jpg (180 KB, 959x959)
180 KB
180 KB JPG
nothing happened when it hit 2000
nothing happened when it hit 2012
whats so different about now
>>
File: Hephaistos.jpg (103 KB, 752x800)
103 KB
103 KB JPG
>>19585592
September 23rd is a Saturn's day, or Saturday, so I will venerate father time Saturn, and throw in Vulcan just for fun.
>>
>>19585592
How can Jesus be returning? The two witnesses aren't here yet. The persecution of the saints hasn't happened. What about the mark of the beast?

You guys need to ACTUALLY read scripture.
>>
>>19585592
>evil globalists and abortionists
lol
>>
I hope He comes back. Im tired of this place and all the bullshit in it. I cant wait to see Him. If He doesnt, I will be pretty bummed, but I'll just keep waiting. I'll be suprised if He doesn't though.
>>
>>19586464
Pre-Trib rapture....
>>
>>19585592
How many times do we need to point to the "NO MAN SHALL KNOW THE HOUR OF MY RETURN" passage in your holy book before you dumbfucks get it?
>>
>>19585592
For the king we will ride
Through the dark galactic skies
To defeat the foes when the chaos wizards rise
Now the universe will burn
Evil sorcerer returns
Tragic fate rages tonight
Chaos wizards rise!
>>
>>19585631
How do you distinguish the "Evil Jew Voodoo" parts from the "Real" parts in the Bible?
>>
>>19585592
buying stuff on ebay from china after i get an abortion at the clinic.
>>
>>19585622
we don't, it could be at 12:01 am or 3:30 in the afternoon
>>
>>19586522
And all the Christians haven't mysteriously vanished because...?
>Inb4 they haven't because they aren't REAL Christians
>>
>>19585999
>totally overeacts while rolling satans trips upside down

Stop treating religion like a spectacle
>>
>>19586522
there is no rapture in the bible tho
>>
>>19585592

>Literal Muslim bhudda who spends his ENTIRE life condoning violence, war and conflict in favor of loving each other, learning to understand each other through our differences and unite through a journey of spiritual enlightement.
>Portrayed as coming down on the world riding a horse while wielding a Thunder struck sword and leading an army of angels.

christfags really understood NOTHING about the story of Jesus Christ. They literally see him as some movie Superhero who will, one day, come down to literally nuke everyone Christians hate.
>>
>>19586607
>literal muslim buddha
>christfags really understood nothing

Says the guy who called Jesus a Muslim...
>>
>>19586620

What? Are you saying this because, by calling Jesus a Muslim, I'm not implying that he was actually Jewish? Jews aren't a race.
>>
>>19586607

That's the kind of talk that's going to get your sinner ass smoted by our Lord & Gardener, Jesus.
>>
>>19586626
Wow, maybe read a history book before embarrassing yourself?

Islam is a byproduct of Christianity. Mohammad cites the teachings of Jesus in the Quran. I shouldn't have to explain this...

Muslim isn't a race either.
>>
>>19585882
Now icdont think the 23rd is when Jesus is returning, but...

Thessalonians 5:3
For when they shall say, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction cometh upon them, as travail upon a woman with child; and they shall not escape.
>>
>>19586679
peace and safety day on the 21st
>>
>>19586658

Oh, I see where you didn't get the joke. I used Muslim as a way to signify his Middle Eastern descent and I didn't really think about it. You're still right, though, but I implied nothign more than a dumb joke in my post.
>>
>>19586464
>what about the mark of the beast?
What it's Facebook?
>>
What if nothing happens? Then what?

Will this be the last and when it fails no one will never hype up a prediction again?
>>
>>19586762

I really don't think social medias have anything to do with this and that if there is such a thing as the Biblical Apocalypse, the Mark of the beast will probably be a much literal thing than we imagine. At some point in our corpocracy ruled by money and business, we will be branded for control and that is when we will know the mark of the beast.

Or to feed another older theory, Noticed how everything tech wise is slowly being linked to your phone? You can pay your bills using your phone, you can make transactions using your phone, you can link it to your car, to your computer, to your E-mail account, to your Skype, to your Facebook and you can even link phones to industrial equipment now. A factory I worked in had a CNC laser cutter with a phone app to be able to do readings on the heat sensors. they did say that the mark would be accepted with open arms by all because it will be given to us by a false prophet. Well a smartphone is nothing more than a tracker chip. All your info is linked on it and it has an integrated GPS, camera and microphone that, as it has been proven, anyone could be listening on to. Smartphones are a trend now and you can't go anywhere anymore without seeing someone on his phone. Even I am always on it. The smartphone sounds like a more accurate possibility.
>>
>>19586764

Hahahaha! This is /x/. Expect to see another one in maybe 3 to 6 weeks.
>>
>>19586764
Come on, Anon, you know there'll be another doomsday prediction within a week.
>>
>>19586762
>I don't understand this newfangled contraption all the youngsters are into
>Therefore it's CLEARLY evil
Got a telegram for you, Gramps. It says "Calm your tits. (STOP)"
>>
that's double our exact date, 13 plus 13. anyone know numerology?
>>
Where the fuck did this idea of pre-trib rapture come from? have any of you ever read the bible?
>>
Matthew 24:36 - "But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.
>>
>>19587054
Your god murdered a bunch of children with bears for mildly insulting someone.
>>
File: 1503355239342.gif (3.5 MB, 519x730)
3.5 MB
3.5 MB GIF
>>19585592
going to be celebrating my birthday with friends...
>>
File: nomanknoweth.png (425 KB, 824x669)
425 KB
425 KB PNG
>>19587054
jesus said to watch for his coming like 10 times and also gave us the revelation 12 sign which to ignore that would be the only true error not date setting based on the bible even though he gives specific dates in daniel of his first coming

1 Thessalonians 5:4
But ye, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief.

Revelation 3:3
Remember therefore how thou hast received and heard, and hold fast, and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt not know what hour I will come upon thee.


No Man Knoweth the Day or the Hour?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJ1yapCMVWI
>>
File: isaac says its 2017.png (36 KB, 875x293)
36 KB
36 KB PNG
>disagreeing with isaac newton

ISHYGDDT

he would be spinning in his grave if you guys didnt believe in a September 23 2017 happening with all this information
>>
>>19587081
so yes they couldnt know the day or the hour back then until revelation was written
and then we got the computer software to see when it was going to happen

so only now do we know the time of the rapture

he didnt say nobody will ever know
>>
>>19587082
Then I'd watch my step and not insult Him. It's your choice.
>>
>>19585592
Going to eat some tendies.
>>
I would love it if Jesus really returned that date. But I doubt it's the time yet
>>
>>19587120
well then youre not believing gods word because revelation 12 is part of it

rev 12:5 is the rapture

so unless theres a delay between those 2 verses then it has to happen
>>
File: 1504789074250.png (163 KB, 501x337)
163 KB
163 KB PNG
>>19587120
everything is here
>>
>>19587125
God's word.

No man knows the day or the hour of his return.
>>
>>19587120
There are many people who were given visions by the lord saying the time is practically over. The day it will all happen no one knows for sure
>>
>>19587141
see >>19587085
>>19587108

he gave us the revelation of jesus christ with a revelation 12 clock to give us the exact hour and day including telling us its on the feast of trumpets "at the last trump"

no man knew the day or the hour when he said that

now you can see exactly when it is

just like the wise men were able to see exactly when jesus was born the first time
>>
>>19585882
It's not my fault that the actual godson of samael didn't go to your school and showed you really cool books and trinkets like a sentient flaming sword
>>
>>19586038
Nice failsafe for when nothing happens
>>
>>19585592
my whole material life has fallen apart over the last week

gonna go innawoods til summer

everyones welcome to join
>im a hoot a minute

hanky panky will not be tolerated
>>
>>19587155
i like how apologetics often makes Jesus and God speak in tautologies
>>
>>19587300

Hanky Panky is inevitable. Join us or face your destiny.
>>
>>19587082
he set the stars in motion around the north star after our alignment was thrown outa whack with the Pleiades
>>
>>19587307
i'll go for the destiny option

been reading celtic church stuff, mentions all the

>bear will leave the cave, belly of the dragon dripping stuff

pic related

>off into the wilds i go
>>
File: buddha.jpg (13 KB, 236x292)
13 KB
13 KB JPG
its simply the celestial shift into the age of aquarius
maybe it will be a mass spiritual awakening.
a new dawn for mankind.
im sure the egyptians made up stories of something similar.
do not worry friends.
we will be fine.
>>
It's not jesus, it's Lord Kalki.
Praise Kek!
SIEG HIEL!
The Kalki COMES!
>>
>>19587433
thats the antichrist deception
were just evolving into the next stage here take the mark of the beast
>>
>>19587081
aren't father and son 'same guy' tho? how can i don't know what i know?
>>
how big your ego is to think you are the one whos going to live the end of times?ยจ

this generation is not special,even worse we are the most shallow one in history

go take a selfie and shut the fuck up or else...
>>
Well, that's a Saturday so I'll probably help out at the farmer's market and take a nap.
>>
>>19585592
im sorry Op i dont know how to tell you this but the beast gets 7 whole days to do as he sees fit. a day in the bible is like 2 billion of years. entire universe plus humans made in a week (yes adam was made on the 8th day but humans were present outside of the garden like in nod where cain wandered and found a bride)

the universe is between 12 and 14 billion human years old. so the beast gets almost as much time as the universe has been around minus a few thousand years

the tribulation period officially started last year. 49 years after israel is put back on the map with a blood moon.
>>
>>19587470
They "are" I'll try to explain the best I can. You see when the everything was created the first of everything was also created (Holy Grail, Holy sword etc.). Also the first ideas of what a spirit does was also embodied in individual spirits/souls. These would pertain to all actions (Love, Lust, War, Music etc.) anything that a spirit/soul is uniquely capable of. Being a "son" is something that is unique to a spirit/soul so of course the first "son" was created the holy son Jesus. So since he is the holy "son" it is mostly agreed upon that he is most like the father than any other spirit/soul, so much so that they may as well be the same but technically really are not. This distinction is usually irrelevant most of the time, but in this case it really is relevant.
>>
>>19587475
That's the thing
They're so fucked it will be the last one.
I almost feel sorry for all those little children borne by the generations of the 90s and the 2000s
>>
>>19585592
probably play some vidya
>>
St. Jude recently interceded on my behalf and the miracle I needed happened. Thank you St. Jude.
>>
>>19586789
>"No one could buy or sell unless he had the mark"

Pretty true tbqh. Even at my job you have to have to have a phone to get updates. It's almost impossible to live for the average folks without a phone or something similar. The mark is masses of people staring into their phones for whatever reason. The beast and the mark is everywhere and has infiltrated every aspect of our lives.
>>
I will summon the virgin Mary and fuck her in her cornhole.
>>
File: jumanculus.jpg (57 KB, 1200x720)
57 KB
57 KB JPG
>>19586074
>>
Acid
At least 4 tabs
Smoke a shit ton of dope
Get some mushys
Get fuck eyed on port
And also smoke 2points of dmt
While vigorously masturbating to through the fire and the flames
While in the middle of perth city
>>
File: 1505129078203.jpg (34 KB, 640x620)
34 KB
34 KB JPG
>>19587603
I was just gonna drink all day but ok you do you anon
>>
>>19585592
>giving someone a free ticket to paradise is evil

cant quite wrap my head around that one
>>
>>19587588
No you get a sit down conversation because that's what you need a therapist.
>>
>>19587112
Fuck. Yo. God. May he strike me down if he's real.
>>
>>19587688
>May he strike me down if he's real.
Why not ask for Revelation instead of Tribulation? You'll receive what you ask for in time.
>>
File: 420 blaze it faggit.jpg (78 KB, 765x570)
78 KB
78 KB JPG
I'm gonna smoke some weed and give thanks and praise to God.
>>
>>19586595
Top Kek
>>
>>19587577
>2000 years later
>Nothing that would meaningfully qualify as "the mark" has appeared, and it appears that nothing ever will.
>Find something that isn't "the Mark"
>Squint your eyes really hard until you can rationalize calling it "the Mark."
>Call it "the Mark."
Truly, a belief system of honesty and integrity ;)
>>
>>19585622
ITS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD! THE CHILD THAT IS BORN IS THE ANTI-CHRIST OR SOMETHING! He will need to grow up to become powerful. Guys don't let any children be born on the 23rd, duct tape vaginas when labor starts. If he is born in Africa we might delay his rise!
>>
>>19585592
Probably jerking off?
It's what I do most nights anyway.
>>
>>19585592
Hopefully smoking a whole lot of weed, and hoping that Jesus' coming isn't nearly as lame as portrayed in these hick paintings.
>>
>>19587700
Why not ask for a dick in your ass?
>>
>>19585592
that horse is like "wtf am i doing in space"
>>
>>19585821
and..............

/thread
>>
>>19586508
prepare to be surprised
>>
>>19586764
>being this new
>>
>>19588989
Well with a little weed, that pic can have some epic elements, like god the farther's unleashing of the rapture hawk and the guy with one jazz hand.

plus everyone is focused on the horses ass
>>
>>19587452
guess we'll have to wait and see
>>
>>19588725
praise almighty jah
>>
>>19585592
going to work like normal

the 23rd of Sep is just a sign that you may or may not see, the real happening comes later

stop believing fear mongering trolls, they're attempting to discredit the bible
>>
>>19589093
because the bible is SO credible
>>
>>19589097
then I guess theres nothing to worry about
>>
>>19589101
precisely.
>>
>>19589112
but thats what I said in my first post
>>
>>19588899
I was raised christian(protestant) but I'm not some devout bible thumper. The bible is full of shit that wouldn't make sense in our current year. Not to mention the talk of dragons and all this other bs. I'm just saying if there was a mark the smartphone or tech in general is the closest thing to it we have in the present day.
>>
Jokes on jesus. Horses cant fly.

He should have invested in some spaceship to comeback on. Pretty dope if he comes on a star destroyer
>>
File: 1503630137468.png (64 KB, 588x469)
64 KB
64 KB PNG
>>19585592

Please remember what 'apocalypse' means.
>>
>>19589179
wait

are you for real
why didn't it occur to me sooner?!
I wouldn't believe, but now I do and it all makes too much sense. Believe, you reading this, BELIEVE!
>>
>>19585592
IT IS A LIE!
>>
Maitreya, Jesus, kalki, Muhammad, the Jews messiah, the antichrist. Let's just keep waiting guys. Let's just keep waiting until we destroy this earth ourselves
>>
>>19588906
If he's born in Africa, we are fucked. Too many people and exploitable resources.
>>
>>19587515
that makes christianity a polytheism
>>
>>19586576
LE-GEEEEEEEND OF THE ASTRAL HAMMER!
>>
I get and believe that Christ died for my sins and resurrected, hes an awesome teacher but I've been wondering like why the theatrics? You could judge people on there righteousness without a blood sacrifice so like why. God could weigh someone's actions and see if they did up to his standards and fully cleanse them for purity for entry to heaven. Christ could even still rule I just don't get the sacrificial lamb thing. It's like someone dreamt this up and were just actors in a play
>>
it sure is fun to believe in such stuff from time to time and keep up a dream (illusion) that the world is not as dead, non-magical, and gray as it actually is.
>>
>>19585592
Getting an abortion.
>>
File: 1478357032526.png (249 KB, 1168x925)
249 KB
249 KB PNG
>>19590279

Because every person has sinned and every person has fallen short of the glory of God. "Judging people on their righteousness" would end up sending 100% of humanity to Hell. On our works and righteousness alone, we are all damned.

Remember Cain and Abel. Cain offered his works, vegetation (the result of him working the land) and his sacrifice was rejected. Abel offered the first born of his flock of sheep, a blood sacrifice not resulting from his works. This offering was accepted by God.

Remember Passover. The judgement of God will pass over every soul washed in the blood of Jesus as the spirit of death passed over the homes of the Israelites whom had blood (of a lamb) on their homes.
>>
File: IMG-20170912-WA0004.jpg (209 KB, 1323x696)
209 KB
209 KB JPG
Great Tribulation, the. Thrid temple in Jerusalem, a great falling away from the church, great persecution of Christians worldwide, the mark of the beast, and the rise of the anti-christ; all these need to Happen before the Son of God returns.
>>
>>19586606
>Harpaso
Same thing.
There might be two raptures, the first before the great Tribulation to all the saints(so no one on this board), and one before the son of man or mod tribulation. Lots of theories with scripture behind it.
>>
>>19586789
It's transhumanism, alter your DNA with RFID chip implants or electronic tattoos, something by along those lies. It will also be "voluntary". You either get it, or you are shunned or killed, it won't be forceably put on you.
>>
>>19587588
Mary was only a virgin when she gave birth m Jesus had brothers, she was a good Jewish women she was fruitful.
The enternal virginity and sinless Mary are wierd Catholic dogma and found no where in the Bible. She was blessed for sure, because she gave birth to the Messiah.
T. Raised Catholic, grandma has a statue of Mary and two pictures hanging of her.
>>
File: 1405929658745.jpg (57 KB, 820x481)
57 KB
57 KB JPG
>>19586588
>"Real" parts in the Bible
Do you believe in the easter bunny or santa?
Bible, simple I don't believe in desert fairy tales.
>>
>>19585592
Honestly as far as doomsday prophecies go this one seems as close to legit as you can get. Literally everything has fallen into place. Virgin crowned with 12 stars, clothed in sun, moon at her feet. The feast of trumpets. Exactly 50 years from when Jerusalem was given back to the Jews. There are an awful lot of coincidences here.
>>
>>19585592

Wasn't Jesus a lefty?
>>
File: XU1GqVc.gif (487 KB, 500x281)
487 KB
487 KB GIF
>>19586096
>/x/
>>
>>19585592
Kek. Laughing about this thread.

>I believe in Jesus. And Ghosts.
>>
>>19591019
>Read paranormal board
>Surprised to find people who believe in the paranormal
I don't get it. Why are you even here if not to discuss paranormal things?
>>
>>19591059
Because they get paid for it, why else
>>
>>19585592
using that fake ass jesus
>>
>>19590454
yeah now he's only sending 95% oof humanity to hell. Much better




Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.