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i don't want to sleep tonight /x/
What's wrong anon uwu
here's a short one
>go to make NOPE thread on /x/
>discover /x/ is D E A D
>no skeleton pops out
who's this Joshy?
Since I love a good nope thread I'll contribute even though SOMEONE HERE IS BEING LAZY.
>be gravedigger
>only spoops are knocking and doors shutting
>sometimes typewriter jihads itself and types gibberish
>anyways, I go to work one day
>normal day
>gonna dig me some holes
>go to open up my shop
>door is unlocked
>shove open door while mumbling to myself about the lock being shit (it really is, I accidentally ripped the door knob off once.)
>guy is standing on the other end of my shop messing with the radio
>for once I'm glad my shop is way too small and cluttered, he can't run straight at me and shiv me
>guy is wearing my jacket
>asks me what I'm doing here
>tell him I work here, this is my shop
>he says he works here
>"Look man, I know you don't. Just come on out, let's not make this a thing.
>>I'm the new guy, I just started today.
>Mind you, I'm the only full time guy at my cemetary. I would have loved to have a new guy.
>"Look, you're wearing my jacket and the deadbolt is busted."
>>No, this is my jacket.
>"I know it's not, just come out here. Let's not have an issue."
>dude finally comes out of my shop and says he feels like a jackass
>"You are a jackass, but it's fine, no harm no foul. And look man, if you want a job I can get you one."
>call another cemetary super and ask if he needs a guy, etc
>I figure guy won't stab me if I'm on the phone with someone
>give him my number and whatnot, tell him to call me on monday and I'll see if I can't get him set up somewhere nearby
>offer him a ride back to wherever he belongs
>he takes me up on it
>I make sure he didn't steal anything
>take him to the gas station and get him a soda
>offer to buy him a pack of smokes or whatever
>he declines, just wants a 65 cent can of Dr. Pepper
>take him back to his hobo hut, make sure he knows to call me when his phone is charged
>2 weeks later, find some shit thrown under bushes
>fancy man airline card and a buisness card
>office lady calls the guy
>turns out guy had a bunch of shit stolen
>he says quite a few people along our stretch of road have had cars broken into, or were mugged
>cops come out to cemetary a few times
>turns out, the guy I ran into is now in jail for stabbing at least one person, suspected for stabbing more
>his MO is acting appoligetic and waiting until a person's back is turned
>he's stolen stuff from hospitals, sick people, and randos
>from prior combat experience I knew to never leave my back exposed to an unknown
>I was so nonchalant and nice about the whole ordeal he decided not to fuck my kidney with a screwdriver
>plus I never gave him the opprotunity for a sneak attack
>a total of like 2 dollars in gas and soda saved me from potentially getting dead
>now I always carry my cc when I open up my shop
>people are still the real spoops at cemetaries
That was a good greentext, anon
Glad you made it. You could have had your shit wrecked bruh
Quality greentext
you're schizophrenic that's not how things work
Good greentext anon
anon, good green text
bad greentext anon
you sound icredibly delusional for a 15yo
>nope back to /mlp/
bad greentext anon
i mean i dont go on /mlp/ and i dont know what i said that sounded like it. after a few hours there's been one(1) good nope story in this thread total, so i wouldn't call it lively...
would you like to hear my lame ass nope story?
>"Muh CC"
yeah bro duh thats why i made this thread

You have to go back
Catholics can't sell their soul anon...you should know that. Your soul belongs to God and is not yours to sell.
pretty sure catholics souls belong to the pope who uses them to decorate his ego
fine, but I told you it's fucking lame

>be me, 8 years old
>grandpa took me and my older brother camping somewhere near Sedona, Arizona
>rented a cabin
>sitting on the porch one night listening to my grandpa tell us bullshit stories about killing nazis
>later find out my grandpa spent the war in San Diego working on ships for the navy and never saw combat
>suddenly see some white shape moving around the tree line
>I have bad eyesight and was supposed to be wearing glasses, but never did
>grandpa takes us inside
>he grabs his rifle from the closet
>tells us to lock the door and go to sleep
>he goes outside
>peak out window, see grandpa sitting on the porch with his rifle across his lap
>can't see anything by the trees
>lay in bed and try to sleep
>about an hour later
>peak outside
>grandpa's gone
>freak the fuck out
>wake up brother, he's 10
>tell him
>he says we should get "weapons" from the tool chest
>I grab a hammer, he grabs a screwdriver
>hide under blankets clasping our weapons
>an hour passes, hear something moving on porch
>work up courage to peak
>see grandpa sitting back where he was before
>go to sleep
>wake up in the morning
>grandpa tells us to never talk about what we saw
Good story.

Glad you made it bruh.

Good story man. Glad you made it.
Oh, okay.
Its only a demon just fuck it then youl sleep well op
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I already been with Stacie McRoastie.

Not worth your soul man, barely worth $40 bucks for the movie and dinner
not that lame, i wonder what it was
can you ask him?
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yeah, I asked him about 10 years later, a few months before he died and he insisted it was a bear, which seems reasonable to me but I distinctly remember it being white. Sometimes black bears have very light brown fur >pic related

but that doesn't explain why he told us to never talk about it or why he sat outside all night with his rifle.
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So when I lived in Haverhill, Mass
> Go to Newbury port beach
> smokin Jays with some new found friends
> see weird black figure walking on the waves
> Anon do you see that?
> round up posse and leave as shadow reaches the rocks we just were at
the people we went with are at this point pretty weirded out we had more joints and even beers for the adventure we give them the rundown they are "ok" with our decision and go to a friend's house to finish the goods.

I go home and fall asleep on the couch because I like couches FU.
> tapping/rattling on window
> TV remote starts to wiggle
> turn on TV to stupid ghost show on AE
Just started and all the weird stuff stops
> talk about a Demon and bleep out his name
Sister walks down, her dog was growling in the dark which is abnormal for him
Watches show with me and I tell her what happened we both get chills
> tells me "I left home to avoid this stuff..."

Felt terrible but it was an odd grouping of spoops
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great one nice
more like this please
Ew look. I found a faggot.
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This is a fucking gay /pol meme.

Please ritualisticaly commit suicide OP.
That was fucking excellent. Thanks anon.
nope threads are why i first started coming to /x/ like 8 years ago and /pol/ is just rageporn
lol so NOPE Lmao XD
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being this new
Keep a tight grasp on those ankles Brit I'm sure mr Abdul will finish soon
Anyone have more on this "waifish woman"? Never heard of it before
Yeah that's why I posted it I never heard of it either and a google search turned up nothing
Anyone has that story with the kids and the bear statue in the snow?
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It's dangerous to be this fucking naive and stupid even if you are 15, go tell your dad to slap some sense into you or you might end up as a cumdumpster for a group of fat old men.
The scariest thing isn't a ghost, a demon or even a serial killer. The scariest thing in the world is knowing that your life and the lives of everyone you know is in the hands of Kim Jong and Trump and there's nothing you can do about it.
This thought has kept me up for the past month, expecting a warning to pop up on the news saying we have minutes to live until the missiles come.
This is our current reality.
i get what you mean but after 10+ years of NEETing it up and doing nothing but eat, shit, sleep, watch anime and play vidya i really wouldn't mind dying, sucks for my parents though

That's my argument
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Oops wrong one, was meant for >>19715932
>being this much of a normie
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nice pic
Was he a skinwalker?
Anon could you describe as much detail as you can recall about the figure, how it moved, size etc.?
...but you don't need to refrigerate eggs
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nvm I found it
Danke friendos. I still don't know what his dumb ass was doing. I honestly think he was just looking for a place to chill. I mean, the shop has a radio, heat, minifridge, microwave, chairs and shit.

I don't understand the issue. Normally when I'm at work it stays in my car. I just carry it when I open so I don't get stabbed now. I didn't say I was a super awesome operator or anything. But bullets are faster than toothbrush shivs.

I doubt it. He did have really green eyes though.
It basically sounds like a banshee, it has all the attributes.
>had green eyes
Def a skinwalker then
Shiiiieeeeeeet. Guess I made friends with a skinwalker. Do I get magic powers now?
>be innawoods
>see ghost
>being this retarded.
You really dont understand just how powerful nukes aren't. You most likely live in an area that would make a nuclear impact desirable. And if you do, you honestly kinda deserve to get the nuke. In the mean time you think trump has caused this issue. North Korea gets a big dick every 5 years or so because they spend their entire GDP on military spending ans they require food aid. So they threaten other countries, who then decide to send them food aid. Its a form of appeasment. You literally have nothing to worry about. The entire USA, Western Europe, SK, Nipon, anywhere the West spreads is basically protected by NORAD. You are not in danger. You will not be vaporized. Kim Jong Understand will never launch a strike. Not unless they have the backing of China, Russia, etc. If that's the case, it would never be a nuke. Your literal worst case scenario is you get drafted. But you are such a cuck youd probably be put in the boi pussy services to act as relief for the soldiers returning to battle. You do not need to worry.

>go back to /pol/
I'm not some white nationalist idiot. I'm just not an idiot. NK is not a threat. Trump is hardly a threat. Stop being a pussy and man the fuck up.
My dong is spooky.

no spoops, no shakes, no skellys
you should be ashamed
Question: what's with all the "we never talked about it again" shit in these stories? if something legit paranormal happened to me and a friend I'd never stop talking about it - to them at least. acting like it never happened? I can't understand that. Makes it sound like it just never happened.
Why the fuck would you skin a fish?
When you can die at any moment, you know that nothing matters, and when you know nothing matters the world is yours.
So you don't have to eat/eat around the skin.
Are you 12 years old and having your first existential crisis? Why the fuck do you care? You know there's a much, much higher chance of you or everyone you love dying in a fire tomorrow, right?
God, why are there so many normies on /x/ lately?
But why?
The skin keeps the meat inside moist and flavorful. It also gets deliciously crispy if you cook the fish right. I understand skinning a big fish, but the skin is so thin on a small fish that there's just no point in taking it off.
Well, it made me nope. I'll tell you about the time I saw some fucked up shit t make up for it.
>be gravedigger
>setting up for funeral service
>grave is dug, casket lowering device in place, vault in the ground
>vaccum chapel, make it all nice, spray off brand febreeze to make it not smell like the building is made out of corpses
>go to help funeral director move casket
>they have pall bearers
>I ain't gotta do shit until they leave
>I usually stick around if it's not a military service
>at least while they're moving the casket
>they can do their own thing after that
>one of the pall bearers drops his end
>casket hits floor
>>there was a reason it was closed casket
>parts roll everywhere
>head rolls past me
>funeral directors escort everyon out
>I have to suit up in hazmat gear
>put body back in it's places
>we get a family member not crying to confirm everything is in the right spot
>this lady was in 7 pieces
>had to fill out an assload of paperwork later
>got in fight with big boss
>he thought I somehow did it on purpose
>Yell at him about not wanting to ever put a decapitated head back on a body
>wind up getting hazmat pay for a couple hours
>chapel still smells like fresh death
>old death that's been embalmed smells less bad
>I've shampoo'd the carpets twice
>the smell still lingers
>people still complain about it
tl;dr, I put a corpse back together because some fat fuck dropped his sister. Apparently she got axed by her husband. Thus is life as a cryptkeeper though.
Since I'm still here, how about another story?
>be in different cemetary
>they have a crematorium
>super there asks me to check the burn
>all I have to do is open hatch and confirm body is burning right
>open hatch
>see skull at eye level
>meat and fat melting off bones
>tell super "Yep, that's a spine."
>apparently you need to make crematoriums tall enough for a body to sit up
>when it's below about 60 farenheight, weird shit happens
>arms rise up towards the flames
>stick straight up
>body makes loud sighing noises
>then it sits up
>arms stretch straight out towards the hatch
>basically you get a loud corpse looking you dead (pun intended) in the eyes
Real talk, that shit will fuck most anyone up. Especially if you're not expecting it.
Fucking kek, especially at the first story. I'm a medfag so I can empathise with having a job related to nasty shit.
Honestly the idea of cremation freaks me out. Human bodies and fire should never mix in my opinion, not even after death.
Yeah, I actually work just diagonal from a hospital. I'm the super, so I let emts and nurses smoke on the property. We always talk about fucked up shit. I get to tell them about cleaning leakers and they tell me about failed suiciders and shit. Cremations are the burial of the future though. They're cheap, clean, and simple. It's just that the guy doing the burning has to be a cold bastard. Kinda necessary for an undertaker though.
You sould either run a blog with these stories, or publish them somewhere...I would read the fuck out of them. I find these jobs and stories fascinating, even if not exactly spooping...the mere anecdotes are awesome.
In America you do, because they wash the eggs before selling them.
I've been told I shoud write a book about my life. Between """private security""" and cemetary work, I have a lot of stories. Most of my time is spent just doing maintenance or breaking my back moving granite. But every week or two I get some neat/gross story. Fun fact, we get what are called "At Your Convenience" cremation burials. Just bury/inurn them whenever. Most places actually have a safe with a couple urns in them at any given time. We don't have a safe, so they just hang around. I give them a ceremony myself, because no one they knew cared enough to have a funeral or go to a burial. Hopefully a Klingon death prayer, and the promise of a seat in Stovokor is good enough for them.
>Private Security

Nigga you a Merc
Was. Thus the excessive use of quotation marks. I am the scum of the earth. I do the jobs others won't. I'm essentially a well-mannered cockroach with thumbs. Gravedigging is far more my speed though.
I completely get it. But hey, at least they pay VERY well... Depending on the job of course, we all do what we have to do to get by
Ew look, I found a sister-penetrator.
Also, you're one of the better ones if you're well mannered, most operatives I've met are dickheads
>Implying you could pull your little CC let alone aim and fire before Abdul gets his jungle cock up your tight asshole

p.s. I'm American
>Most likely live in an area that would make a nuclear impact desirable

You mean civilization?

Flyover detected
I was a field translator. Being a white guy in the VZ is interesting. BUT, they made my "Excessive use of force in the act of self defense" charge go away. Apparently NOT shooting someone and instead breaking a few ribs is bad if you get jumped.

Yes, that is true. I may be a sick degenerate, but I am polite enough. I don't exactly follow societal rules, buy I'm a decent guy more or less. And niggas can complain all they want, but if it wasn't for jackasses like me, gas would be 4 bucks a gallon. They usually keep they psychos seperate from former military and people like me. We called it genpop and psych eval. Normies with guns stayed away from Dahmers with guns.
>Former badass merc, trained to kill without emotion, over 300 confirmed kills, etc
>Now works as a grave digger with MUH CC AT THE READY!

Go fucking LARP elsewhere, nerd.
>little cc
I'm the gravedigger. My cc is a .45. If a guy can run around a caskey lowering device, backhoe, dump truck, table, AND a lawn mower in the roughly 1.8 seconds it takes to draw my weapon and fire then I deserve death. I am a failure. But considering the situation, I could do a somali double tap twice.
I was a field translator. I barely saw combat. I literally just talked to people. I'm not badass, I just know how to use a gun. Why is knowing how to use a gun evidence for larping? Man, I'm enough of a pussy that I'm spooked weeks after a guy broke in.
>Muh double tap may may

You're such an obvious RPing faggot
>not knowing heart, shoulder, head sequence
>not knowing somalu double tap isn't a regular double tap
>not knowing how to take down someone drugged up
I think you just don't know how to into combat. There's a specific procedure for dealing with that kinda shit. You don't double tap in a firefight. You definitely do if it's one guy who is potentially fucked up on fent and coke.
OK faggot. Tell me more about your navy SEAL delusion.
why are you so triggered about guns? no pun intended
You know what would have been scarier than no skeleton popping out?
how do you feel about the tv show six feet under?
not your exact profession i know, but you deal with funeral homes that are family run?
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The real NOPE is what that city has become. Holy fuck.
Would have been better if you turned out to be dead and didn't realize it and came to work and there was another guy doing your job and he had to kill you and bury you again.
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Have any of you ever eaten a catfish?
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>walking around yard
>see something on the ground
>it's a bone
>a femur bone
>a really big femur bone
>ask family
>p-probably just a dog
>show police
>probably dog
>show vet
>yes dog
>why was a giant dog femur in my yard anyway?
>cheap, clean, and simple
Just like I want my departure to be.
>Be me, 14-15 years old
>Hanging around an old viaduct with my friends, drinking mainly beer.
>about 2 miles from nearest village, 2.5miles from my home.
>The way home is nothing but fields upon fields.
>Starting to get dark, my dad calls and tells me to come home for dinner.
>My friends decide to stay there for a while longer and I make my way home through the wheat and corn fields.
>decide 'fuck it' and watch the sun disappear behind the horizon
>Pitch black now, but i have the light on my phone so no biggie
>notice fields have crop circles in them and get a chill up my spine a little, again no biggie as me and my friends used to try make them.
>have a crushing fear of aliens but also they're my curiousity too.
>Anyway continue walking through the fields in the dark
>almost trip up over a few hedgehogs
>carry on walking and make it to the old railway tracks, not too far from home
>light up a smoke and slowly walk through the cornfield, my house is on the opposite side of this field.
>hear a scraping sound like when your foot slips on dirt.
>look around, dont see shit
>turn the flash on my phone on and have another look.
>Just see corn and bugs flying around.
>turn off my flash and turn around about to carry on on my journey, that's when i heard it...
>A very low pitched hiss type sound. like an alligator but slower and more bassy.
>almost snap my neck turning around, flash on and look again.
>cant see anything.
>hear that sound again, but coming from my left hand side
>turn again and shine my light
>two eyes light up like a christmas tree about 10 meters away
>just froze in position, and shit my britches.
>the eyes just stare from inside the crops and hisses away.
>hear the corn stalks snap and rustle from behind me with heavy footsteps following.
>fucking booked it right out there as fast as i could
>hear the corn snapping and rustling like whatever they were were chasing me.
>see my house, and fucking clear the fence like an athlete on crack, fence was about 7 foot high.
>pick my ass off the grass and straight into my house
>mom and dad ask me what's wrong and i explain that i was just chased by something through the fields.
>dad goes out and has a look around peeking his head over the fence using my sister's slide.
>comes back 5 mins later and says he didnt see anything but he heard the crops rustling and snapping going away from the fence.
>about 4 hours later i go up to my room and just chill out and watch a movie
>open my window and have a smoke (my room overlooked to backyard and fields.
>a few minutes go by and i flick my smoke into the neighbours yard.
>leave window open to air my room out a bit and finish watching movie
>turn tv off and fuck around on laptop in bed.
>hear that noise again
>sphincter tightens and i freeze again
>floodlight activates outside
>get my air rifle from wardrobe and load it.
>look out of the window and see a shadow lurking behind the fence, look around my garden and another shadow going into my shed.
>i scream at the top of my lungs for my mom and dad and run down stairs to my dad
>tell him the things are in the garden that followed me
>he goes to the pantry and picks up a golf club and goes outside
>we hear the things run off into the field screeching
>we look in the shed and there's just fucking blood everywhere, i mean everywhere
>those fucks had ripped open my ferret cage and ripped my ferrets to pieces.
>cry like a bitch because i loved those furry little bastards.
>after a while, realise a ferret was missing, my Ivan
>search around some more but cant see him, he must have escaped
>look around garden for him but no luck
> my dad locks the shed and says we'll have a better look in the morning.
>cried myself to sleep
>wake up about 5am to grunting coming from the back yard again
>look out the window and see my back gate open.
>see two humanoid figures standing a few feet away from the gate.
I cried. Time for bed.
>they are standing in my garden.
>looking directly at me with those glowing eyes, they stood about 5 foot high, with no neck, about the same build as a child in terms of torso height and width.
>i get my air rifle and take aim at them
>one of them raises its arms in the air as it its surrendering.
>its arms are holding onto something though
>hear ungodly squeel as its arm seperate in mid air.
>the thing throws whatever it was at my window
>splat, goes my window.
>shout my dad and start shooting at theses fucks.
>no enough to do major damage just enough to piss them off
>dad rushed into my room just in time to hear one of the things let out a mighty bellow/roar
>i tell dad what just happened and he looks out of my window to see the things runing through the corn field.
>we go look around the garden and dad shuts and bolts the back gate
>we look around below my window and find ivan...
>the poor fucker was in two pieces.
>those cunts had ripped him apart in front of me.
>cry again.

the following few nights i didnt sleep at all, mainly waiting by my window for those fucking cunts to come back. but they never did. my dad thought it was just some teenagers messing around with us. a few months later we move house away from the fields and in a more populated part of the village surrounded by other houses. it was strange because my dad never wanted to move from that house being that it was my granddads old house. but fuck it, i wasnt complaining, the further away from the fields the better. my dad started taking me to the local gun range and after about a year we both get our firearms certificates and basically end up best buds, never really bonded with my dad properly. about a year afterwards he told me over a drink why we moved from that house. He said about a month after the ferrets getting torn apart and me seeing shit, he was playing on his playstation downstairs and heard the back gate rattle, and thought nothing of it. then he heard a scrailing
a scrailing on the glass door (we had a slide door thing, dunno the name for it) and when he looked he saw what i saw least month and literally shit himself. this happened while i was asleep. he said they just stared at him and made those low throaty noises before leaving before sunrise. and thats why we moved and why he developed a sudden interest in guns.we have never seen those fucks again but we gained permission to shoot on that field behind out old house and regularly looked for the things for a few years until i moved out. from then on though i never kept a pet outside. and i mostly work night jobs now so i never sleep when it's dark. i aint risking being caught off guard by those fucks.
A very broad masculine shape, he was darker than everything around him. Walked on the waves and seemed around 6 feet. The crazy thing was it was a solid shape that moved like it was walking but covered large distances with each "blink". We all had weird haunting stuff after that.
Thing whispered his name to me but I wouldn't repeat it here.

What has happened to Haverhill? Is it full of yuppies or somethin?
Cuz it's a spooky secret too spooky to ever think of ever again
If it is a true brush with the unexplained, then it draws your whole understanding of reality into question. It is easier to pretend like it never happened, to not talk about it, in order to preserve your previous way of life.
It's one thing when you're reading about aliens or ghosts or whatnot because it's conjecture, but if you believe you have encountered it yourself it changes things. That is just my explanation for it.
What irks me is that many of these stories start with the anon getting drunk or high, otherwise in an altered state of consciousness before this paranormal encounter happened. It really draws their entire account into question.
Face it man. Not everyone can handle this shit. A sense of normalcy is something humanity has been chasing for eons.
Woah. Why do you hate guns so much? Did a gun fuck your dad?
Good nope, thanks.
be me? kys
So I've had hearing problems since I was young, its not that im a bit deaf or anything but I just tend to pick up background noise and lower tones more easily. I've always been hearing the general thrum of being in a city but during highschool when I packed on a few more pounds and started going for early morning jogs I realized I was hearing things that weren't there, like there was always a group of people talking just far enough away that you wouldn't make out what they're saying. Fast forwarding a decade nothing has really happened with the background noise, sometimes it gets louder or quieter but as long as I focus on hearing it its there. Now in a new town with a new job I wind up jogging on a local nature trail to keep the fat off my ass.

>Go out for my regular jog
>Get passed by two people as I go
>Nature trail is in a heavily wooded forest so plenty of blind corners
>Get about 3/4th down the trail before I start feeling that somethings off
>realize the "background noise" I usually hear like a distant conversation have changed
>It's now more like the tense whispers of the audience waiting for a show
>I feel like they're silently urging me to continue on the trail
>Yeah no fuck this shit
>turn around to jog back
>"Background noises" are fucking pissed at me and I'm pretty sure I can outright feel it
>fucking sprint as far as I can away from whatever the fuck that was
>wind up getting to work late and sweaty
>Next day skip going for a jog
>sister calls me at work to ask me if i'm okay
>turns out a mountain lion killed two joggers on that trail and some woman from a nearby residence and she was scared I got ate
>check it online
>fuck I almost got ate

First of all, what's wrong with being a normie? I have a job and a family. It's pretty rational to fear for their safety. I have something to lose.

Secondly, do you really feel safe? Both leaders have incredibly fragile egos. Eventually one if then will hit a nerve and then that's it.
Everything was going well in the world and all countries were making progress. That all went to shit in 2016 and we all took a step back
Do it
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>he thinks an agency set up to keep tabs on santa is going to protect him from the nuclear holocaust

If this is true, how do you live? How do you go on with life after and experience like that? I had things going bump in the night and the occasional shadow person sighting as a kid and even as an adult I can't sleep with the lights off.

How do you go through something like this and stay sane? Seriously, ProTips would be great.

And , if this story is false, bravo! This is one of the best horror pieces I've read in recent memory. HPL would be proud!
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Do it man, do it! You have a follower here.
Because shooting bears without a license is a a big fine

a gay lustboy that is now stalked by his sugardaddy...x is trying to make sth spuntzy from dis...
I have a friend that fits the "leddit category" but uses 9gag. Besides him sharing le epic 9gag meme xD once in a while he's a good guy.
>Thinks an agency set up to keep tabs on the nuclear holocaust is going to protect him from Santa

He is coming for you now
Yes why?
Trump is standing up for us. If North Korea sends even one nuke, we will blast it out of the sky and retaliate with a nuke large enough to destroy them. HAARP is not for studying or controling the weather. It's for detecting ICBMs before they can reach us.
Thinking those two cuck actually hold that much power is the biggest lie you've ever been told
Holy fucking shit
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If these threads were empty, that's death. The absence of life. What I see here, lurkers included, is life. En masse.
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If you really believe the fate of the earth is in the hands of a reality TV star and the most bloated trust fund baby in history, there's a word for that. Nope.
Ever thought of what might happen ecologically if a nuke gets shot down?
If it falls into the ocean, pollution will spread with the tide.
Honestly, don't put too much faith in missile defence systems.

As a side note, a few weeks ago s.korea tested it's missile defence system which it bought from the US. Guess what? There was a misfire.
The fact of the matter is that they are both in charge of the nuclear button.
Sure, maybe they have generals and military people suggesting strategies to them but at the end of the day, they could both launch nukes if the mood strikes them.
I know that Trump has a member of staff whose job is it to carry the 'button' or whatever the firing signal is. He is always close to Trump 24 hours a day.
nothing too paranormal, but I post something anyway

>go with mom to lowes to get a grab bar for bathroom
>she wants one the same color as the towel bar she has
>I pick out a brown color one
>she's confused and says the towel bar is silver
>I swear up and down it's brown
>I can picture it clear as day in my head it's brown
>we get home and it is silver

did I have a mandela effect?
Mandela Effect used to be called False Memory.
Your brain is not infallible, it makes mistakes and usually makes you freak out when something doesn't add up.
Was the family latin american? Asking because there's a tendency for domestic violence/murder involving chopping limbs off, decapitations.
The explosion is what causes dispersal, idiot. Nuclear devices do not explode like conventional bombs either.
probably right
Every president since WWII has had control of nuclear weapons and so have the leaders of 7 other countries as they developed their nuclear arsenal.

Think of the leaders or groups around the world that have their hands in the button and you are scared of your own president.
That reality star is also a retarded moron with bloated ego bigger than that of the North Korean, oh and he's also the president so he has access to nukes
I never buy any shit when it comes to digging through repressed memories, especially with that kind of repetition. At some point you're not "remembering", you're just coming up with a story.

You see a horror movie, go to sleep, wake up, have a nightmare, write down what you remember, but it's all bullshit; it's all tainted by your modern perspective and what was going through your subconscious when you tried, you're not bringing stuff out of the depths, you're merely inventing something new to fill in gap.
Damn, good story.

If I were you I'd go back there to find these fuckers and butcher them alive for killing the furry critters. That is, provided that the story is true.
No you wouldn't. You can't just casually bring up something this painful and strange. Something that goes against normality so much would drive you crazy if you thought about it all the time, that's why people choose to forget it and move on.
Not OP but Haverhill is a shit hole now.
You aren't American you're a Democrat.

I'm terrified of aliens, and this legitimately scared the actually Jesus out of me. Just mosey'd out of me like a happy-go-lucky fucked from a night club. And like that- Jesus was physically scared out of me.

He's making a list... and checking it twice.
Hi, well at the time i was pent up with a lot of anger and regret for leaving my babies out in the shed, however, we did look for those things, whatever they were. we never saw them again, we even went to our old neighbours and asked them if they have seen anything or heard anything but they said nothing apart from cats going missing or turning up ragged to shit. but no one has seen what's doing it. they think it';s just foxes getting brave. i've look up on here for about a year to see if anyone has had any similar encounters with these fucks.
i dont think they were aliens man. too primitive for my liking, why would an alien tear my babies to shreds? it makes no sense. no, i do not think these were aliens at all.
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End your life
he didint want your parents to think you guys werent safe staying with him. not that hard to see when your 18+. you should prolly go back to school kiddo
Sound more like a cuck desu
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/x/ is not dead at all , just summerfags and /x/ trend that finaly calmed down , im so happy most of the normies are gone
Prior service, more American than you could ever hope to be. I just recognize that you and the vast majority of other soft blowhards with zero training won't do shit in a SHTF scenario, you'll vacate your bowels and run screaming with your CC still in its holster.
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>Anyone who disagrees with me must be a democrat!
>Daddy says those are bad after he cleaves my asshole apart out in the toolshed

Wrong again, fucko. Try anarcho-libertarian.
The line about cats going missing ruined it. Learn to LARP properly.
what do you mean it 'ruined' it?
im glad people have proven me wrong

You know there's just one word that might describe that, right? Or did you burn all your books?
They'd probably still keep for the couple days you're in the woods, especially if you hard boil them first.
Some things you just don't talk about. It would be like summoning a demon to fuck your lifes bumhole for life. Us Alaskan indians have some serious superstitions.

are the walls wood? you may be used to seeing the wall reflection on the bar.
Clifford died.
i think you have to skin catfish

catfish skin is like rubber. it's not the thin skin that's on scaled fish. how the fuck can you not know what catfish skin is like?
Don't be too suicidal anon.
I wanted spoops not tears,,
Looking for an /x/ Discord server?

almost bailed right after the third line about the typewriter. thought it was going to be some shitty ghost story. good man. this is how 4chan should be.
Anybody else just kind of remember ghost sightings that they totally forgot about? Just today i remembered that i saw my aunt's ghost like two days after she died.

> be me, 5 yo
> beddybye time
> look out to hall and see a white figure with black outlines, like a black and white drawing
> it's my aunt patsy, who was always super nice to me
> before i can freak she just continues down the hall towards my parents bedroom
> freak for a sec then calm down.
> i don't know why but i just decided to go to bed and forget it

completely fucking forgot this happened.
I was tired and my shift at my local BK just finished.
> every now and then i'd go enjoy a cigar or cigarette at one single spot
> had a scooter back then
> go to this spot which is at a mountain top and you can see all of the town, its astoundingly great
> also close to a rich neighborhood so not too bad
> lighting my smoke
> get this feeling something is watching me
> look around.
> nothing
> smoke a little bit and hear this deep scream come from the woods behind me
> since it's some rich neighborhood I just thought kids like I was once just fucking around
> keep smoking but was on the tip of my toes
> hear branches breaking and snapping
> start getting on edge
> hear it again
> get to my scooter but not too spooked
> try to start my scooter
> don't work
> have to get off of it and start it by the kickstart
> right as I get off I hear these loud footsteps coming straight for me
> about 20-30 yards away
> they are running quick as shit
> manage to start scooter
> nope the fuck out of there
Prior service makes you an even bigger cuck.

>Muh muh
Are you ass mad because you lost someone in Vegas? You do realize the guy you're talking to said he was in Private Security. That's where the experience comes from.
>I just thought kids like I was once

Oh an adult and he works at BK.
I got really immersed while reading this.
No need to be that high and mighty over him. At least he's working. It's not glamorous but it's better than him being a NEET or something. For all we know, he's working at BK while he was paying for college or something.
Enjoy your aids, cali
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I'll share something from my childhood I think about on occasion.

>Be me around 6-7.
>I was playing in the yard, it was summer and most of my friends went off to their other parents, usually to their dad. This town was filled with families whose parents had separated or divorced.
>I was hanging out in front yard, occasionally going to two trees to the right side of my house and climbing them. Digging at a section of the ground, looking for treasure.
>I decided to go fuck with the ant piles over on the left side of the house, since that place was infested with them and I felt like they needed an extermination.
>Dad gets home, we regard each other as we passed, asked about each other's day but conversation fizzled quickly.
>I walked to the side of his pick up and noticed some weird worm-looking creature or object.
>In my young mind I imagined it to be a skinned snake, not sure why. Looking back on the memory there would've been nothing that suggested muscle or anything that seemed like sinew.
>I remember it as being an off-color of white, like a foot long maggot that had a weird vanilla tinge to it.
>I can't remember if it was limp or moving.
>Shiggy diggied the fuck out of there because something about it scared me.
>Went to tell parents that there's a snake near the pick up.
>They both went out.
>I stayed in the house for a bit then followed them.
>They were near the pick up discussing whatever it was.
>The only thing I remember from the conversation was my mom asking my dad how it got there.
>My dad just kind of shrugged and said, "I don't know, the thing must've hooked on under my truck."
>"Well, lets not tell Anon about this." my mom said.
>Dad got a gallon bucket and scooped it up with a shovel.
>It seemed to try and roll out of the way of the shovel's blade.
>He put the bucket in the back of his truck and took it somewhere to dispose of it.

I still haven't asked them about it, doubt if they would remember the incident anyway.
Been a while since I contribooted. This happened two weeks ago

>get back from night shift and go to sleep at 2
>parents wake me up and ask me to watch dog
>grunt a ten four at them and move downstairs

just a small explanation, our dog prefers sleeping in my parents living room. whenever i watch him and i had a night shift, i sleep there

>fall onto bed, still tired while leyla falls back to sleep aswell
>wake up sometime later, its not dark anymore, probably 10 or elf
>a woman stands to the right side of my bed with her back towards
>hear constantly loud sounds and grunting i think
>dog is completely silent, i cant move my body
>she shakes once and then like a snap vanishes

I was really paralyzed. I had this urge to try and sink lower into the sheets but i just couldnt move. Couldnt look away either but I felt like I was burning up inside. Guess I'm glad I coudlnt see her face safe ffpr a bit of her side which seemed stitched, but I'm even more weirded out how I, now thinking in retrospect, tried to rationalize it back then. right after she vanished I didnt think it so strange, I made sure my dog was still there and then looked back again. I really thought I had simply mistook something like the ceiling-lamp for her head. It was also pretty weird, assuming there was something in my room, that my dog did not notice it.
My dad once woke up screaming in the night because he saw a woman who looked like his mother walking through the e room and he's really not the type to believe in ghosts or stuff
Hope it could entertain some of you diehards
a morbid answer that may help you look at it as something a bit less spooky, maybe your dad hit something on the way home and it got mangled into his car's undercarriage? maybe they just didn't want to explain what happened to bambi.

or it was a brain slug idk I'm not a doctor
That's always what I assumed it to be, that or a piece of one animal or another that I didn't recognize.
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Thanks, you should ask your dad though.
what the shit
That just sounds like sleep paralysis anon.

Happens to me all the time.
pastaing a post i made in a similar thread from the archive.

>be a few years ago
>be january and winter
>walking home from friends house at 3am
>he lives about a 10 minute walk from me
>half way home
>stop to relight my joint
>in the corner of my eye i see something flying towards me
>its a duck!
>i think its a mallard duck (green head and brown body)
>it lands on the road about 10 feet away from me and immediately starts waddling up a driveway towards me
>i decide to continue walking
>ducko follows me
>i dont want to get the fucko
>i walk faster
>ducko waddles faster
>arrive at home and get inside
>ducko just hops on my porch and patrols it for a few hours
>in the morning there were duck footprints all over my porch and driveway

not sure what that duck wanted. i called the wildlife control people to ask about it cause i thought ducks migrated in winter but apparently some of them bum around for one reason or the other.
>stop to relight my joint
he just wanted to blaze anon wtf
I want the failed suicider stories
ITT: A bunch of the same outrage junkies who were saying Trump would have mexicans and trannies in concentration camps by now.
Idk why but out of the thousands of stories i read, this story hit my heart the most. I'm not tearing up like other animal stories and shit but this one felt the heaviest
Holy shit a believable greentext? Now I've seen everything.
But Madonna and CNN told me that he was literally Hitler.
What's the name, pussy?
jesus christ, how could you not know the name?
You're the biggest asshole in this thread, you know that? I was expecting some mild spooks, but you just had to crank it up to eleven, didn't you?
Fucking cunt
Fuck you too, asshole. I hope you and your other ghost buddy get haunted by blind pedo ghosts.
>be me, playing dream daddy simulator one day after launch
>boot up game and create my daddy
>half way through playing i hear rustling outside my bedroom window
>paranoid but not enough to distract me from this awesome gameplay
>peek at my window every so often just to make sure
>an hour in i hear the rustling again, this time the noise is followed by a rising silohuette
>hop a little in my chair in fear, accidentally fall over
>back myself to my bedroom door pocket knife firmly clutched in my hand
>sweating bullets as figure raises arm under the moonlight and punches my window to shreds
>sends shards of broken glass flying across the room, scoring my pale cheeks
>shaking violently, let out blood curdling scream
>this does not stop the burglar, he puts one leg in at a time and slowly makes his way into my room
>walks slowly towards me, shit and piss all over the floor around me
>as the figure inches closer and lets out his hand, a sudden wave of relief hits me
>the dark cloak overshadowing the figure slowly dissipates, releasing my dream daddy from his abyssal captivity
>a bright yellow halo drapes over his aura, hand positioned infront of him, gesturing to me as he smiles
>i grab his hand, we are suddenly transported into an infinite expanse of white nothingness
>as i gaze into his eyes i feel like i have been dropped into a pit of pleasure
>i can hear the faint sound of something familiar playing in the backdrop of our loving clutch, it reverberates across the entirety of this expanse
How do I upvote this? Ecks dee, ecks dee.
Because he said he wouldn't tell me here, asshole
sorry, I'm just as lost as you are. I was just trying to seem in on it.
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>inna Scottish highlands
>kinda close to winter so it gets dark early
>me and friend are newfags when it comes to hiking so we have none of the recommended stuff like headlamps
>spend the entire day walking hills and stuff then decide to walk back to a local inn
>took us around 20 mins to walk from the inn to the spot where we started our hike
>but now it's dark and both of our phones are dead
>pitch black can't even see my hand if i hold it out in front of me
>walking around in this total darkness and silence besides our footsteps and the wind for over an hour now
>pretty much in my friends ass the entire walk because he swears he knows the way
>occasionally hear branches snapping and rustling coming from both sides of the road we're on that's surrounded by huge trees and hills
>we both stop dead in our tracks when we hear something on the road behind us
>neither of us says anything
>something just left the trees from the side of the road we were on and slowly walked to the other side
>see headlights approaching us
>they're probably worried about hitting the two retards walking down a road in complete darkness so they switch to full beam headlights
>take the opportunity to look around us
>nothing there but a totally empty road and a bunch of trees
>we figure out where we are ditch the inn plan and just wait in the dark until our bus arrives

It was probably just a deer or something but I was fucking SPOOKED. Even just the thought of a potentially huge deer being so close to us in complete darkness got me. I wasn't even aware it could get that dark until I was in it
>Be me
>be deployed in Crimea on the Ukrainian border
>Sargent in the Russian army
>be tank gunner in a t-90
>we hear gunshots and I mean a lot of gunshots back and forth
>hear artillery and tanks
>I take a look with my binoculars to the northwest not over the Ukrainian border
>there's fucking explosions everywhere
>against the fire you could make out men holding guns running north
>this goes on for 4hours
>Suddenly it all stops
>we can only hear people speaking German
>we here an explosion next to the tank
>we can see muzzle flash coming from the tree line
>we report to command that we are under attack
>we engage the fire from the tree line
>eventually all the firing stops our
>we are called back to base
>we tell the commander that we came under heavy fire
>he tells us that there was no Ukrainian troops in the area
>we show him where the artillery fire was and the explosions were and even where the men were running
>fucking nothing
>it rained that night and there were no crates no footprints no tracks
We spoke to the locals and they said the place was haunted
what the fuck
I know right? He was too busy defeating isis in 30 days
It was the most confusing part of my deployment then again I only spent a year in Ukraine the rest was in Syria
What the fuck is with all these stories with lighting a fucking cigarette like really, be me 12yr old cigarette, be me working cigarette, be me it's winter, gotta light me a fucking cigarette. Real original fellas
don't forget to add in interjection.filename like that is somehow a hilarious or original addition to the story.
That's old as fuck and just a tradition really. If you're going to rip on that, you'd better do it for the ">be me" autism.
he was fighting germans in ww2 for a fer minutes you mong.
Ya, fucking rude
You know we've tested dozens of nukes in the ocean, right?
what a fag
go back to lllleddit you pleb
Well, maybe. I guess you're right, my dog would have woken up.
fucking kill yourself dumbass

>implying Trump is dumb enough to do anything to start a nuclear war
>implying KJU is dumb enough to get into a war with America
>implying no one would stop Trump
>implying no one would stop KJU
>implying NK has enough power to make significant damage in the US without getting their entire country fucked up
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Fucking euros
Good feels
Lame is the mark of truth.

The fags who post about multiarmed corpse zombies that have 12 foot long tongues make me roll my eyes.
>complains about be me

New fag
At worst, NK nukes a neighbor state and gets fucked in the ass... Alternatively, they shell SK (again) and get a finger to massage their prostate. The latter is more likely.

Trump can't do shit but tweet. Democrat shilling is blowing up everything to comical levels and are dragged down below him for it. Weirdest blessing disguised as a curse for the Repubs (especially as the candidate voted by repubs to spite of the GoP)... But the fear mongering of US political parties (especially the dems) is hitting maximum kektacle hard enough to be hilarious.
Go to sleep Tweek
lurk moar
Is Trump a Democrat or a Republican? I can never remember which american political party is which.
They have the stupidest fucking names, especially considering we used to have a party called the Democratic Republicans that had different priorities than either.
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Found the faggot again
>be about 20
>wild camping in the middle of bumfuck nowhere rural scotland
>just me and a friend
>we're prety good and experienced, trap our own food like rabbits and shoot deer
>not sure if legal but we didn't care
>usually stay out there for a week or so
>we're about 2-3 miles away from the car just chilling in this large wooded area surrounded by hills and shit
>got a good little set up going on, couple of hammocks covered by tarps and a couple of tents
>nice fire pit
>a few nights into the trip we are drinking whisky and target shooting with the pistol style crossbow he brought with him, having a laugh and warming up by the fire until it got too dark to see properly
>gets stupidly dark, cloudy as hell, no moon or stars
>decide to just sit out since it was still nice by the fire
>middle of talking about some bullshit or other
>snap of a twig about 30 metres away to my right, out of reach of the light and we're totally night blind
>we both freeze and turn towards the sound
>another snap slightly to the left, and slightly closer
>friend picks up the crossbow, rifle is in tent behind us and we really didn't want to move or turn our backs
>we wait for what seems like ages but is probably about 10 seconds
>another snap directly to my right, really fucking close. im between the fire and whatever it is
>i nope the fuck out and shuffle around to the other side of the fire without looking away to sit next to friend, safety in numbers and all that
>rustling, something moving around in the trees
>can kind of see shadows moving but nothing else
>friend shouts out suddenly
>whoever the fuck that is I am going to start shooting if you don't fuck off
>I swear to god we hear a snort, sort of like an animal snort, but also sort of like a human scoff when someone says something stupid
>about 10 more minutes and it sounds like it is literally on the edge of the light of the fire
>another twig snaps and friend fires a bolt straight at it
char limit cont>
>hear a thud and a weird grunt
>more rustling but moving away
>sounds move around the fire but get steadily further away
>eventually can't hear anything
>stay awake all night
>start packing up as soon it is light enough to see
>I say that maybe it was a wolf? They say there are none left but people report seeing them in scotland all the time
>friend says no way, but we need to leave
>I ask why
>he says he shot too high, and heard it hit
>I mention that we were both freaked out as fuck and maybe he misremembers
>he wanders off into trees, taking the crossbow with him
>I carry on packing up
>few minutes later he shouts me from about 15 metres away from the fire
>bolt is stuck in a tree at my shoulder height (I am 6'3")
>fucking blood around the bolt and on the tree
>some on the floor too
>droplets leading away where we heard the noises moving last night
>he tries to pull the bolt out of the tree but can't, tell him to leave it
>we power walk to the car so paranoid and intent on looking around I didn't notice walking through a patch of nettles until later
>spend the next three days at his house with all the lights on 24/7 drinking and watching family guy

Never been back to the area since, we have gone once more but in a larger group and at a manned camp site. Never doing that shit again. We have told a few people but not a single one believed us, just thought it was us trying to creep them out.
At a hospital I used to work, sometimes you would be sent to another area to deliver a paper or ask for a test, it was common that whoever was sent wouldn't come back in 3-4 hours despite it being a 10-15 minutes trip, people just got "lost" in the hospital, but didn't recall doing anything aside from walking from one area to the other.
>nurses chatting with other nurses
>nurses doing fuck-all in a side room

Seems legit.
Shit nigga I have green eyes, am I a skinwalker without knowing it?
Depends. Get a kitchen knife and go outside. If you kill someone, yes.
Don't know about skinning fish but scaling them is what's usually done at least here. Maybe the poster means that.

Not entirely similar but reminds me of that green text story some US army guy deployed in afghan or something posted a while back.

Can't remember it exactly but I think it goes, he was at base, Then over the radio came a call that a patrol was under attack, and they could hear really intense gunfire in the background, And they were trying to ask for a position or grid ref or anything to locate them but all they got was a guy screaming into the radio to "Get the 60 going!"

As in M-60, Vietnam era machine gun... and then the radio went static, They checked in with everyone and their were no reports of any conflict for that day.

Anyone have that green text?
>be me and 14ish
>running around with a couple friends in our small Midwest town
>decide to explore under the little bridge
>find the big drain exit where the street drain dump into the creek, it's big enough to walk into
>go inside, it's pitch dark
>the rich kid has a flip phone with a light so we go on
>I lead cuz I'm not afraid of the dark
>about 30ft in: cobwebs
>push through because we are stupid
>webs get thicker
>aim light down the pipe
>enormous blob of webbing hanging from top of pipe, hundreds of spiders crawling all over it
>walls are moving
>more of that shit as far as the light let me see
> I turn and sprint the fuck out of there, holding the light, leaving my friends in the dark
>rip off my shirt, checking myself all over for spiders
>friends grope their way back out
>they're pissed, don't believe me
>had arachnophobia ever since
That's the gayest thing i heard in this site.

How do you look scared while flipping someone off lol

this. work IT for a group of hospitals.had to block netflix because the overnight nurses would watch movies instead of patients.
Not exactly a nope story but more of a funny little story with a twist.

>be a Reserve Deputy with the local Sheriff Department
>be on patrol on a Saturday night
>County has a covered bridge built in the 1850's
>many years ago a new bridge was built next to the old one and the local town near it bought some land next to it to make a tiny park to go along with the bridge.
>hear over the radio one of the nearby town officers call in he was 10-20 (located at) the covered bridge
>then he calls in a 10-27 (drivers licence check)
>then he calls in another 10-27
>after 15 10-27's lol wtf is this guy single handedly breaking up a party
>a few hours later I find out he ran across a group of out of area "ghost hunters" that heard about the bridge and were there to find spoofy shit
>park is closed from dusk till dawn so they had to go

The twist

>two months prior a local resident decided that the world was fuck, grabbed a rope and "hero'ed" himself from the bridge rafters
>a month later another local resident decided that the world was fuck and thought that the other guy had a baller idea and "hero'ed" himself from the rafters at the bridge too
>two suicide's in two month's placed the location in a "increased patrol" situation

If the ghost chasers only knew they would probably be pissed being ran off.
Yeah. This happens to me all the time. I always forget my handful of paranormal experiences when it’s story time.
I laughed.

Though it makes me wonder what goes into "suicide holes" like Aoikigahara. Combination of strong EMF produced by natural magnets and a memetic influence? Then the memetic influence increases its popularity with the ghost hunters/explorers which in turn produces more suicides. All the while, the natural EMF and memetic influence just keeps the suicide engine chugging.

Yo, got any more stories as a cop?
Tfw schizophrenia
Fucking lold
I came for spoops not feels
>trying to be cool oldfag
>it's "an hero"
now thats spooky
Got a lame story here if anyone's interested, though it's kinda hazy

>few years ago(don't recall how many, my memory isn't great)
>friend of my mom's lends us his cabin in the woods to use for a weekend(don't remember where it was)
>party consists of me, my older and younger sister, and our mom
>younger sister was really interested in bigfoot at the time for some reason so she was stoked
>we get to the cabin
>there's a large clearing in the back with a shed and some kind of shelf with clay angels, clearing opens up into trails
>friendly dog comes to greet us, doesn't have a collar but we give him some scraps
>no cell service so we can't ask the cabin owner about it, he didn't say anything about a dog either
>doggo is cute however so we let him faf around
>family spends most of the day dicking around on trails in the woods, while i read inside
>they have to wear bright orange caps so hunters don't accidentally shoot them
>night comes around
>we decide to have a bonfire, doggo still hanging around
>suddenly doggo becomes upset and runs off to the edge of the clearing near the shelf and starts barking and growling
>we don't know what the fuck is happening, only light we have is the bonfire
>we only hear and see the dog, nothing else
>sister starts freaking out and thinks she's seeing bigfoot
>we retreat as a group into the cabin and wait
>doggo eventually stops barking, comes and lays down on the porch
>we all sleep uneasily
>next day family comes across some hunters on a trail
>apparently a mountain lion or panther or something was spotted in the area
>be me
>Junior high
>Rural West Virginia
>Bus stop is a mile and a half from home
>Walking home from the bus one day
>Transition from old houses to mostly woods
>Dirt road
>Hear screaming in the woods
>Walk a little faster
>Scream again
>Running now
>Tree branches snapping beside me on the hill side
>Flashes of gold through the trees
>Home in sight
Dogs flipping absolute shit. All of them
>Grandpa is on his porch with his rifle
>Yells at me to dive into the ditch
>Fires once, reloads, fires again
>Comes to make sure I'm okay
>Laying in the road behind me is a massive golden brown cat, come to find out later it was a cougar
>Stalked me almost a mile and almost chased me down

Only animals I'm truly afraid of are large cats.
Quality posts. Thanks man
please leave
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>be me, just now
>reading nope thread
>it's late at night
>power went out
>the power box is across the road
>it made a loud squealing/shaking noise
Are you the retard from the wendigo thread? If you are, fucking neck yourself
Wait... Is there ISIS in Peru? I remember skipping that tile a couple months ago on facebook. Now that I see it again and read the description... I have questions.
i would pay good money to watch a furfag on xanax even lift a finger rather than get into a real fist fight.
can you describe a little more what you saw,
and what ur dad saw?

What do u think they are?
how the fuck didnt u record them

And where in the world is that? post coordinates pls
I have many, though I'm not used to telling these stories so bear with me... Will start with childhood story, more of a shitty thing to happen but there's a spook in there too.

>1995 - 6 years old, playing footie in front of house
>drunkard at high speed in an old car runs me over
>it's a hit and run alright
>don't really remember moment of impact, actually my memory is blank for around 15 mins before and about 30 mins after the accident, only know what friends told me about it (and from the point I woke up)
>wake up at the hospital 30 min after
>see nurses with worried look on their faces, at least 3 caring for me
>a doctor is nearby, he sees me waking up
>"Hey buddy, we'll take good care of ya, just rest now"
>can only slightly move my eyes
>see my body covered in blood, feel cuts on arms, legs and face
>they don't hurt though, but I know they are there
>wake up 1 week after, throwing up blood

Its "an hero" you fucking newfag.
writing on mobile, sry for the delay

>need a nurse to take constant care of me, feed me, take me to the restroom, clean me up etc
>at night she usually slept for a bit, though she would remain on the same room I was in, but I kept waking up, usually around 1 or 2 am
>she'd close the door and the blinds, turn off the TV, always at the same time
>the first night I woke up, I woke up to the door open, and a very old man who was also a patient was looking at me
>he didn't say anything he just kept looking
>then he waved
>for some reason I didn't feel threatened, so I waved back
>he giggled like a child and left
>nurse woke up right after
>she came to me and asked why the door was open
>tell her I didn't know, I woke up and the door was already open
>she seemed a bit annoyed
>this kept on happening for an entire month, old man would always come in, wave and leave
>on my last night before being discharged, a new nurse came in as replacement
>tells me the former nurse said that I was playing tricks with her, opening the door at night
>"bitch I can barely walk on my own" think to self
>still, decided to tell her about the old man always coming in at night
>she looks at me, seems worried
>"Anon, this is a children's hospital only, didn't you know/notice?"
>my fucking face when the old ghost of a deceased child probably wanted company and came to wave at me every night

that or I had sleep paralysis for an entire month...

> be me
> browsing /x/
> go on a nope thread
> see this faggot> 19731389
> challenging all greentext traditions
> interjection.filename
> decide to greentext him
> it gets boring quickly
> give up bc I'm an uncreative mf
> wait for a reaction

(pic completely unrelated)
For fucks sake,
ask them now and post results!!

Of course they fucking remember
me. probs some cock hungry hoe who is mad I blew her off.
Is it fuck.

Good point, my mind just immediately went there.

Nonetheless, that's freaky shit man.
>65 cent can of Dr. Pepper
>be newish professional
>work in small office in a smallish town
>the office is in a house built in 1890 or around then, it was obviously once a residence
>always working late nights because noob
>that's the only time I can get anything done
>old house sounds, occasionally spooky
>there was a basement
>rickety wood board stairs that led down into a spacious, dank basement that is mostly filled with boxes and boxes of old paperwork
>there's a hole cut into the concrete of the floor right in the middle, it goes down at least three feet, either into solid concrete or the hole is lined with concrete
>the hole is about 18 inches in diameter, and the bottom is filled with murky water
>there's a pipe that goes up into the ceiling, who knows where, and water sometimes drips into the hole from there
>the hole is sometimes very full of water to the point of almost flooding, sometimes barely any water, but strangely there is never any mold around that I can see
>I get weird feelings whenever i'm down there
>the boxes are arrayed on shelves sort of like a library, and when I'm down there, I swear I hear or see out of the corner of my eye someone down there with me, just a feeling
>late at night, I sometimes hear creaky footsteps or something like it on the second floor where my office is
>my desk faces out towards my door which is always open, facing the top of the stairs which go down to the 1st floor, then to the basement
>its well past 9 PM, and i've been working very hard on a particular issue all day and was exhausted
>I doze off a little bit at my desk and kind of prop my head back
>I wake up, my hands are on my chair's arms, not moving
>I can not move, starting to get a little panicked
>I am staring straight ahead out my door of my office
>I hear steps walking, a dark shape of a man walks straight by my office door, remarkably tall, with a very straight posture as he walked
>the figure simply walks past the door then down the stairs...
check 'em.
>the figure walks down the stairs, and I can hear more footsteps, then the basement door opens, and I can hear more footsteps
>at this point, I know this is probably sleep paralysis or something, but what the fuck is this man doing walking down there
>I keep catching glimpses of a smaller figure looking into my office, really low down, like a child's size
>I can feel my sweat on my pleather chair, and I feel my heart beating in my chest, I am beyond scared
>the basement door shuts
>sleep paralysis is over, I can move now, I get up right away and look down the secondfloor hallway
>go downstairs
>hear nothing
>go to basement
>door is shut
>ok, I guess it was my waking dream/nightmare
>go back upstairs, feeling a little silly now and the sweet sweet rationalization is in overdrive, trying to make myself feel better
>the fucking lights go out
>the power is out, it comes back on in a second
>all the printers in the building are spooling up as they restarted, and I'm fucking ready to get out of here
>grab my keys, go down the stairs, to the back door
>basement door is open
>Its open like two inches, was it like this before, did I imagine going down there to check? Am I still dreaming? I'm fucking out.
>Get to my car, remember that I forgot to check to see if the front door was locked. Haha, not going back into that building, run around to the front to lock.
So other than some weird feelings, that is all I've experienced here. I asked my boss who owns the building what the fuck is up with the crazy pointless hole in the middle of the basement. He said not to worry about it. I asked someone else, and they told me that the building used to be a funeral parlor.
>The hole was used to drain bodily fluids of cadavers.
dude, play some metal gear solid. it teaches idiots about deterrence and that neither side will ever fire their nuke first in fear of retaliation
this is really good bait
It's very sad that you were so spooked by that experience. City folk are truly out of touch

You guys can doubt and say whatever you want about my fears but just remember that at least nukes are real.
You have a lot of faith in deterrance or the US' missile defence but machines can fail and humans are unpredictable.
At this point, we are closer to nuclear war than we have ever been. All it would take is one of trump's bombers to malfunction over NK and both sides would take it as a sign of aggression.
If one side launches nukes, the other will retaliate with their whole arsenal.
That would lead to the allies of each country jumping in and before you know it, survivors are living in a nuclear winter.

Now tell me that isn't frightening.
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>About a year ago, living in a shit cabin on the edge of the woods (not in the middle of nowhere though, right by the road in a town)
>Staying up late, reading about ancient Canaanite religions and cults and shit on my phone, listening to egyptian-y music cause sometimes I like to read to appropriate instrumentals
>Get up to go pee, no plumbing so I just go outside by my usual tree
>Hear the sound of a fucking flute, like a pan flute
>Freeze in place, suddenly have Spidey-senses-hearing enhanced from mild adrenaline dump
>It's a real sound, and it's coming from the treeline.
>It's playing an egyptian-y melody
>Start to try to rationally go through the possibilities:
>my phone is in my pocket and not playing music anymore
>property is adjacent to a popular camp ground, so maybe it's stupid kids sneaking onto our property again (except this treeline is on the south side of our property-- campground is to our north)
>Music continues fucking playing, sometimes seems to be close to the treeline edge, other times deeper in the woods
>Still frozen in place in my fucking pajamas like an idiot, telling myself to stop being a pussy
>Suddenly remember that my wife and I had gone out into that section of woods a few months before
>Start to completely NOPE out
>A few months before, we had found a nice big pond puddle out there in an open clearing, and I had also earlier found a huge section of treeroot that I thought was cool and carved Norse runes into
>Why not?
>Stood the runeroot upright at the head of the pond and staked sticks in a ring around the pond
>Cool little shrine to Odin
>Couple months later, we have a baby piglet who's not going to make it
>Wife says we need to mercykill it
>Bright idea: why not give it a sendoff at the shrine?
>Grab hatchet, take it into the woods with piglet
>Nice night, bright moon, reflecting pool looks downright elvish
>Place little piggy across from the runeroot, say a little prayer for the poor thing and cut its neck open

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>Both kind of sad, but what can you do?
>Go back to house, leave piglet

>Fast-forward to me shitting my pajamas
>This flute music is coming from that same fucking direction
>I actually say to myself out loud, "don't be a pussy, go out there and see what the hell it really is"
>Flute melody sounds like some fucking court jester mocking me out in the woods
>Can't fucking do it, can't go out there at night with no weapons, fuck that shit
>Even if I had a gun, I wouldn't
>Start thinking this is actually my first major encounter with the supernatural in waking life, brain is having trouble processing

>Go back in the cabin
>No lock on the door, oh well
>Grab my old antique sword (no joke) and knife and put them by the bed
>Go to bed sweating bullets and completely freaked trying to imagine any mundane explanation

A couple weeks later I think I found one-- we were keeping chickens under the cabin at the time and the hens were roosting all up in there. If you spend time with hens, you know that they make weird little quiet cooing noises when they're nervous or if you wake them up at night.

Still to this day get shivers typing this out because I just don't know if that's good enough to explain the melody of it.
The only other explanation would have been the delinquent campers theory, but the other thing was there were no voices or firelight, just the music.

For added spoop I had had a couple nightmares before this about a banshee/witch type woman out in that section of woods trying to kill me in the fog

i hope you took care of your grandpa well.

was out bowhunting one afternoon. got to be getting dark, couldn't see well enough to shoot now so got out and headed back to the road. halfway through, started hearing a mountain lion (cougar) scream. man, that's one thing you don't forget, and one sound you never want to hear again while you're out in the woods alone with only a bow.
Does sleep paralysis open doors? I had a similar experience and the main reason I never wrote it off was because my bedroom door was opened.
>two tantrumming children with nukes are arguing
>it totally won't turn into a real war guis

and you're calling other people idiots? feel bad for kool-aid swilling alt-shits sometimes.
i dont think nukes will be detonated where people live ever again on this planet.
nukes today are more like a cock mesuring tool than a massmurduring device.
nobody fucking wants that
fucking hell this one
>i dont think nukes will be detonated where people live ever again on this planet.

That's the assumption everyone makes. It's been over 70 years since the end of WW2 and we managed to hold off on using them since. We still have them though. As long as they exist, they are a threat no matter how much you trust your politicians.
The fact of the matter is, Western countries are moving warships to the Pacific, by NK, so they are in range if something happens. If NK really wasn't a threat, they wouldn't do it.
That itself is cause for alarm.

>be me, 4 years old
>have asthma, catch flu, get complications
>mom and dad trick me to take me to hospital
>say we're going to look at the babies
>had just had a baby brother born a couple months before, so we visited the nursery there a few times before he came home
>for some reason, liked looking at all the babies
>get to hospital, get put in a bed oxygen tent
>pretty sick for a few days
>one night late, hear a knock on wall next to bed
>wake up some, see the wall is actually now a big white door that's opening
>brilliant white light streaming out from behind door
>older man and woman come walking out from door
>they're very kind to me, talking to me, touching my head and stroking my hair
>tell me it's going to be all right
>smile at me, then they leave back through the door
>fall asleep
>up next day, ask mom who that was that came to see me
>also ask her where the door went, cause it's now just a wall
>mom asks nurses if someone came to see me over night
>they say no, no one allowed in the kids area after hours except parents and immediate family
>tell mom there was a door right next to my bed that opened up and not there now
>tell her it was a man and woman older than grandma and granddad
>describe them to mom, she looks funny, but just hugs me

I wasn't asleep. I was sick, but I saw that door open and the light and the people.
Check what happened outside that missile site in Minot ND in 1966 and again at another base in Montana in 1967. UFOs appeared and disabled the missiles.
Hoping they are still watching us.

if there's ever a nuclear war with north korea, it will be one sided. north korea's missile force is in its infancy, both in missile tech and nuke tech. they aren't a threat to us. hell, they probably can't even hit japan. they can launch missiles, but they aren't so good at aiming. i have my doubts their nuclear weapon tech is miniaturized enough to stick on a missile.

they're just sword rattling to get more gibs.
>be me
>on x
>see this shit
The threat isn't north Korea itself. It's the potential reactions from China and Russia.
NK poses a threat to SK and Japan our allies. That's why we are moving our ship's over there.

any major battles take place there? sounds like some ghost soldiers thought you were the enemy
>implying norks don't already have nukes trained on Beijing, Tokyo , Moscow, and Seoul
Grandpa probably saw nothing spoopy except that he killed a man trying to break into his truck and didn't know what you saw.
Survive things a lot scarier than a shadow figure.

>t. Haunted person
Eh. /x/ is fun, /pol/ is a bit much sometimes, but both boards have their gold coins hidden in piles of newfag shit.
Agreed with other reply, banshee or wraith kind of entity. Most of /x/ is bullshit, but these things do exist. Plenty of tortured souls out there.
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Gr8 b8 m8
Some fish have minor poisons in their skin, some have tough scales, some fish secrete oils and slime on their skin that ruin the flavor of the meat. Also, most scales just ruin fish in general. You can tell a nice filet of fish (depending on species, some are supposed to have the scales still on) by if they're skint or not
Had a german shepherd in 5th grade. Died of kidney failure. My mom didn't tell me. Tried to have me over for dinner (family was fucked, living with my aunts.) i loved that dog. I'm an only child, dog was my best fried from pre-k till then. Never going to forgive my self for,playing xbox instead of having dinner with my mom and seeing Daisy one last time.
Speaker for the dead. Read it.
That was totally sleep paralysis, not that it means it was any less horrifying. You usually see some scary fucking shit.
Maybe a bear? They can be up to 10 feet tall if they're walking around on their hind legs, though I dont imagine a bear would've taken kindly to being fucking shot with a bolt
Sorry about your ferrets man, smelly but smart little fucks. Ivan shall be remembered as a glorious martyr for all ferret kind.
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They screwed with a few missile tests too. They've been watching us for millenia. They have to be a bit more careful now because of us being able to into advanced sensors. I see weird things all the time. Most people i talk to about it say "oh it was just a plane/helicopter/drone" but what I saw in joshua Tree was not normal. Explain a drone hovering perfectly over 29 Palms and disappearing into a flash of light
All NK has accomplished recently is splashing around in the ocean. They don't have the power to bring a missile here if they wanted to and if they did, the US would easily put a stop to it. But personally if anything like that were to ever happen, then I'd hope it happens sooner while I'm still excited about it rather than later before I actually have a reason to be here. Either way is preferable.
Pleasantly spooked. Would probably have crapped my pants if I had been there.

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