Please help, whenever I get up at night for something.If my mum sees me, she believes i stayed up all night and lashes out that i can do things during the day, and that god made the night for sleep and other things. Essentially believing her version of events, rather than anything I say.If she caught me going to the bathroom or in the kitchen for some water, she just thinks she caught me red handed and just lashes out that I pulled an all-nighterWouldn't it be normal to assume the person just need to go to the bathroom? Or if they drink water and head back to bed, that maybe they were thirsty?i told her this and she detracted and said "sorry i'm a terrible mother, and you don't deserve somebody like me" it's such an overreaction to me telling her that I did something normally. Like this keeps happening any time I try to talk back to herHow do i handle this?Even for other things, like talking shit about a person behind their back, I tell her it's not nice, she does the same thing, essentially making me the bad person. Or if she's late, she says to get off her back, but when others do it she complains how they lack time management and don't care about others.Is this narcicism?Does she lack empathy?
>>32337133>i told her this and she detracted and said "sorry i'm a terrible mother, and you don't deserve somebody like me" it's such an overreaction to me telling her that I did something normally.bro she's just emotionally unstable and has a mental health condition and/or a lot on her plate. if you have the leverage to do it, try to get her to consider therapy or some other kind of help. maybe get her into meditation or whatever. meds are not a good option but my psychotic mother takes drugs to calm her nerves and that makes her a lot more tolerable.it's not your job to fix her though. keep that in mind. if you can do it without it affecting your psyche and personality, it may be a good idea to just start pretending you are crying or in distress and rush back to your room and close the door as soon as you are done with your business. if she feels regret for her outbursts at all, that may at least get her to cut her rants short, if not stop them entirely.>Like this keeps happening any time I try to talk back to herdon't be afraid to do this. it's not your fault if she's both explosive and made of glass. you DO NOT want to adjust your personality to dealing with these kinds of people. you will become a natural slave, always stepping on eggshells around others if you do this.anyway with your other anecdotes, she is clearly not a very well developed and stable person. I will stop short of calling her evil as i want to give benefit of the doubt. just endure and try to avoid receiving psychological damage in whatever way you can. deflect, adjust minor things, defend yourself, play the victim, whatever. doesn't really matter. just endure until you can live on your own. and don't be afraid to be firm. firmness is not evil. if she starts self-blaming or whatever, that's her problem. you are doing what you think is right. if she feels comfortable dishing it, then she should be comfortable taking it. and on paper she is, if she nominally acknowledges her faults.
>>32337158I remember when i was little, i cried when she did something like threaten to abandon me with her family, if i misbehaved, or marry me off to some family who'd discipline me betterCrying doesn't work, it just shows what she can use
>>32337182then just do more of what you are doing right now. clearly it's somewhat effective if she turns things on herself instead of trying to rip more into you. it's obviously some kind of attention or pity seeking strategy, but that doesn't matter. if she felt she could get away with more aggression or violence instead, she would obviously do that. so just be firm and do whatever practical accommodations you need to limit how much of a bother she is as much as possible.
>>32337133>How do i handle this?Use it as impetus to make plans to move out.
