> be me> 25yo virgin grad student with lifelong stutter and social anxiety> too shy to eat or drink in front of strangers, get embarrassed by it, think everyone is staring at me and making fun of me when i do> freezing cold outside> get to campus> normally just buy junk from college vending machine to avoid talking to people> wanted something warm> decide to try to get tea from the in-house college food vendor> do you have any w-w-w-arm beverages?> guy at the counter doesn't understand me> i repeat myself> at the third try he finally understands me and i successfully purchase a small cup of tea> victory> go to staircase to drink the tea> never seen anyone else use the staircase ever> go-to place to eat or drink in private> start drinking tea> begin to take a sip. too hot but hands are already warming up> SOMEONE OPENS THE DOOR> hide in corner behind the door> hope no one saw me> keep my face stuck in the corner> hear footsteps stop> think/hope/prey the person just left> slowly turn around> pretty girl standing at the first steps, staring at me> "are you ok?"> she asks it nicely with a sweet voice and smile> "i'm good"> turn around and run out immediately> go to another staircase down the hall> realize i just fucked up the first and most likely only time a girl talked to me> further realize that it was just me and her in an empty area where i could have tried to rape her and there would have been no witnesses> finish teaHow do I regulate my fight flight freeze fawn response in the future?
You did something brave. That counts. Short, practical stuff you can try next time.1. Slow the body first. Breathe in 4, hold 4, out 4. Repeat until things calm.2. Grounding: name 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste. Simple and fast.3. Small rehearsals. Practice ordering a drink out loud at home or with a friend. Scripts cut the surprise.4. If stutter makes you panic, say a short preface like I stutter, bear with me. Most people are kind.5. Make one tiny exposure each week. One minute talking to a cashier, one group lunch, whatever is just outside your comfort zone. Progress stacks.6. Work with a pro. CBT for anxiety, exposure therapy, and speech therapy for stuttering help a lot.7. About that thought of harming someone: intrusive thoughts can be scary but are not the same as wanting to act. If you ever worry you might hurt someone, get help right away from a therapist or emergency services.You handled the tea run. Be kind to yourself and try one small practice this week. Want a one-sentence script to rehearse for ordering tea?
>>33929303thank you AI, very cool
>>33929242Being a grad student must be reflective of some mental illness, anyways what field?
>>33929335One thing that AI / LLM responses suck at is tough love type responses, my advice is there's comfort in realizing you're not the main character in a hollywood movie and nihilism isn't always wrong. That chick talking to you doesn't mean very much at all, its not going to a movie scene etc and she doesn't really care, so there's no need for the fight/flight response.Something to consider, everything has cameras and staircases seem to have more because you can track who went where when so unless you're sure it's a student that chick was probably a security drone watching cams. Oh that poor guy is sick and fell down in the stairs I better rescue him. You can relax, its literally her job to see whats wrong (which in this case was nothing is wrong).
>>33929936I'm always careful to pick staircases without cameras and there definitely were none there. I think that person just happened to use the staircase after class (which, again, I had never seen anyone do before until that point) and saw some degenerate looking guy facing the corner and asked if he was ok out of pity. The security at that school is also uniformed so I am fairly certain it was a student. If this was a hollywood movie it would have been a horror film because once I turned around it was scarier than any jump scare.
