everything reminds me of her editionPrevious thread: >>41059574QOTT: we’ll all be dead in less than a month. are u cute? how do u cope? drinking? smoking?
no, i dont
>>41068218>QOTTmaybe YOU'LL be dead, i'll be fine. i don't drink anymore because i'm an alcoholic drug addict and i almost died multiple times and i don't smoke anymore because i'm tryna work on my cardio. so now there is no cope, i simply live with the pain.
>>41068218>are u cute?cute enough to have chasers in my dms but not cute enough to get fucked
>>41068246sounds like cope you faggot
>>41068218>qottI don't think I'm cute but my girlfriend says I am. I cope by smoking weed.. It's the only thing that helps with my dysphoria so I try to be high for as much of every day as possible
>>41068261>the absence of a coping mechanism is copeshut up nigger
>>41068218no i was left because i wasnt cute enough
>>41068218>are u cuteno, even if last thread was trying to disagree>how do you copei’ve always been cripplingly apathetic, which does come in handy when shit sucks because it doesn’t affect me>drinking? smoking?very rarely, i think i’ve drunk maybe 5 times in the nearly 3 years i’ve been legally allowed to, and every once in a while if my friends are smoking weed i’ll join in. i do edibles sometimes, but less now that i’m almost completely broke>>41068269yay, weed! :D
>>41068361surely it cannot be that bad
looking at the mirror is grim
>>41068406it is
it's over trannies
>>41068218>QOTT: we’ll all be dead in less than a month. are u cute? how do u cope? drinking? smoking?Umm, what do you mean "we'll all be dead in less than a month"??to answer your questions: no I'm not at all cute. I cope by using this board to an unhealthy degree, but I also draw, cut, and play Vidya.
>>41068314watch your fucking tone bitch.
>>41068458HELLO?? WHY ARE YOU ALL SAYING THIS??? Did trump pass the "kill all trannies" act??
>>41068448then i empathize with you. i was never cute enough for anyone in the first place
>>41068486born to make others feel better about themselves
>>41068468eat my ass gaylord
>>41068462>>41068474be ready paranoia and delusions are not for nothing, not this time
>>41068501be ready for what? what exactly are they gonna do?
i wish i were attractive and not gay and also not male
im not attractive enough to be with literally fucking anyoneeither ghosted or rainchecked at the last secondim going to be alone for the rest of my life
>>41068548same
>>41068509holy fuck, just stay on guard, rightiods want to kill you.
>>41068536just be straight, easy
I am so lonely I respond to my own comments. Fuck.
>>41068574i bet ur cute
>>41068509outlawing hrt and surgeries feels possible, and maybe the crackdown on left wing groups will target trans people especially, possibly even classifying trans stuff as terrorism somehow
preparing for the rest of my life in the span of less than 2 months takes a toll
ofc the feds are actually trying something on the aws west and norcal clusters no wonder comcast n cox are fuckedddddd
>>41068577I'm not. I'm very ugly.>>41068651I hate rightiods so much. I firmly believe after this awful presidency is over, they should make measurements to prevent something like this ever happening again (ie banning rightiods from voting and owning guns)
Why am I 6'2
>>41068805woman
>>410688086'2
is it bad if my hrt vials are regularly in 75-85 degree temperaturedoesn't get any colder in my apartment
>>41068817>thigh mogs>waist mogsdon't care. woman.
>>41068835So you still mog me in every other way
>>41068843no the fuck I don't. I look like a man through and through. nothing about me is feminine, and I've been on hrt for 2 years at this point.
>>41068851You're not 6'2
>>41068855no but I'm 5'10 that's hardly better.
>>41068865You've never manmoded in your life
>>41068872height doesnt matter im 5'6 and still everyone sees me as a man
>>41068805>those hipsfakemoder
>>410688806'2>>41068878I doubt it
>>41068872I'm a perma manmoder actually, your kind of a fakemoder too. you're thighs SCREAM woman.
>>41068885nothing to doubt you just want attention anyway
Can I ask how well I'd pass itt
>>41068891I will never pass because I'm 6'2>>41068894You're just here to troll people
>>41068805imagine not having linebacker shouldersi hate you
>>41068805AND you shoulder mog me? Yeah, you're definitely a fakemoder.
>>41068948you are just empty because you cant whore in passgen rn
>>41068964But I'm literally 6'2 it doesn't matter, at this height I will never pass
>>41069451you keep saying you’re 6’2, are you >>41069035
im 23 and i have the skull and face of a 40 year old man its actually unbelievable how ugly i am
>>41069464No
>>41069527waow, two separate passing trans girls fixated on their fact they’re 6’2 active late (in my time zone) tonight…
i moved back in with my parents and i started fucking balding and meltingive never looked or felt worse in my lifeim such an astounding fucking retard for doing this to myselfi am such a fucking ugly man
>>41069558a month and a half back home and i immediately hit the wall and disintegrated. 30 fucking years of aging in less than two monthsunsee cc/album#f9O4wSELZTzci obviously looked male before but at least i looked ok. i do not even recognize myself anymorei look like roasted hulking manly dog shit all the timei wish i was dead instead of having to look like this
>>41069625fakemoder
>>41069655im the only realmoder here
i have never malefailed
all my suffering is in my head i just need to detransition and forget about it
my suffering is in my hips
>>41068805It could be a lot more worse, 6'2''
i look like this
>>41070205Same
sunk cost coping is ruining my life
>>41070299same
the only thing i want is a feminine body and i will never hsve it but i could have had if though
>>41070299same but brown
Mogs me
Today’s my birthdayFinally going to turn into a grownup man
in this moment i am euphoric
love (You)
no one loves me
i have it worse
>>41069944i haven’t malefailed since i was in middle school. is it better to have male failed and lost, or to have never malefailed at all?
>>41068218>QOTT:my boyfriend said cute but I feel pretty gross most days. I smoke a lot of weed to cope bc if I'm gonna be ugly I'm at least gonna be gone. I like drinking but it usually makes me throw up so I don't do it very much.
>>41068218QOTTGf says i am cute and guys sometimes check me out, i don’t smoke too much weed anymore because thc makes me feel anxious all of a sudden, smoking cbd is cool….. had cocktail last night but dont drink too much….. oh also we will not be dead in two months because we are resilient
>>41071446i think cbd fucks with estrogen, binds with the same thing that breaks down e and leaves you with excess unprocessed e in the blood or something
>>41068218qott: im not :( i dont cope by feeling terrible all the time
>>41071574that only counts if you take oral
Actually feeling pretty good today so no need to cope Probably getting drunk tonight anyway to celebrate
>>41071574Oh damn thx>>41071764So injection and cbd oil is safe ?
>>41071764oral e or oral cbd? i just take injections, but i do edibles more than smoke werd
>>41071803yes>>41072030oral e
Week1 free of hrtVials still not hereI feel weirdI’m tiredI wanna cry but no tears come, the feeling is skin deepI accept my masculinity, or rather my malenessI’m not a woman never was and never could beI ruined my life by being angry lazy and stupidI ruined it abd hrt can’t fix thatI’m sorry to those affected by my existenceI’m sorry
>>41072274same
PROVEN RIGHT AGAIN REWARD
>>41072514WhyWhat happened now
>>41072547Ligma happened
6 feet tallam so bald
>>41072592what’s happened?
never again
im gonna start cutting again
>>41072910Youre too old to cut
>>41068218why the fuck are my shoulders so big they make me want to kill myself
am i free yet
>>41072927i already got scars it doesnt matter if i add wounds
ur all bdd midshits w personality disorders
>>41072910stop…for mebut sincerely, don’t cut, it’s not a very healthy coping mechanism, nona l
>>41072981there is no other cope everyone leaves me because im not good enough mmg is my only social interaction
>>41072978what are you
>>41072978>bdddon’t think so, if anything i think i pass better than i really do more than the opposite>midhsitmaybe? the lines between young, mid, and old shit feel like they change constantly. i started at 22, so i’d say yes, but i’ve heard anons here say 18 is the max for midshit so who knows >personality disorderi don’t think so. i’ve never been diagnosed or really suspected as any of them. if i’ve got anything going on mentally, it’s maybe autism
>>41073010that's so cute i have bpd too
>>41073010just keep chilling here, i’ll keep replying
>>41072910cut and post photos
>>41073118don’t listen to this anon
>>41073131why not?
>>41073118you first
>>41073010What’s the issue that makes keeping friends hard?I’m assuming you’re not a lying social butterfly
>>41073191i only cut when im drunk and i don't have money to buy alcohol rn :/
>>41073163because i don’t want you to cut
I hate men so fucking much
>>41073336Self hate is not healthy anon <3
kys
i wish i was a woman
>>41072910BASED DO IT AND POST PICS
>>41073401based do you need some estrogen
>>41072978I'm a 36 year old man with severe personality disorders
I hate people so much, I wish they could ever be honest or real
imagine having all your worst fears proven correct every time and still believing things could ever get better or improve
>>41073461oh my god shut the fuck up
>>41073490kill yourself\
suffering makes me cool and interesting
did she ever make the sauce right
do you lasses consider “manmoder” to have a minimum amount of time on hrt? like, if someone’s early enough in her transition, you don’t really consider her a manmoder, it’s only when it’s been a while and she’s hopeless?
>>41073551depends on how over it is, I started at 30 and it was doomed from the start so I've been a manmoder the whole time
>>41073551>her
>>41073354your lame misgendering won't make me hate men less
>>41073575yeah anon, can’t believe i had the audacity to correctly gender trans women on the trans board. my bad
>>41073599never apologize
>>41073580>misgendering?Hating yourself wont make u a woman buddy
>>41073604you’re right, i was being very sincere there
>>41073639*kisses you on the lips*
>>41073618kill yourself
>>41073661Love yourself.
>>41073651:3
ive finally resolved to detransitioni can only be happy if i learn to accept my biological reality and live as a man i wish immense harm upon everyone that encouraged me to troon out. worst mistake of my life
no don't do it please i'm BEGGING YOU
>>41073689are you detransitioning because you never had dysphoria in the first place, or because you don’t like the results hrt gave you/the treatment you get from transphobes as a result of being trans?
>>41073689bye
>>41073711the latter. i am definitely trans and i have felt this way since i was 5, but i was kept from transitioning my whole life and now its just too late.hrt has made me feel worse about my extremely male body than ever in my life. it isnt going to turn me into a woman, so obviously i need to find some other way to treat dysphoria. i will never be a woman and no one will ever think of me as one. i need to try something more productive instead of crying over something impossible.https://files.catbox.moe/onajhe.pngright is what i look like after a year and a half of hrtrepping. my fault for believing ppl when they told me i would pass lmao.
>>41073791oh my god not you again
>>41073791link broken. but don’t hold ill will towards the people who tried to help you
>>41073802dont worry im gone
>>41073810okay woman
>>41073814rude
>>41073819female
>>41073826hugboxer
>>41073845wrong
>>41073853you cant reasonably look at that pic and say it resembles a woman in any way you liar
kms
>>41073689great do it it's not real and doesn't matter anyway
i cut thinking of you today that’s what i get for being born how can anyone stand next to perfection and keep existing
this isn't cutting general you gay retards
>>41073933do it more and deeper
i used to cut with sharp plastic
>>41073791but have you tried bangs
for me it was boxcutters!
>>41068218fuck my stupid male hips and ribcage and shoulders and face
>>41073968i sh by burns even in that im malebrained
>>41073951ok
>>41073977i usually wear my hair over my face, doesnt make me look like any less of a mani only have my hair back in the pic bc photos dont mean anything unless you take the worst possible pictures of yourself imo
i sh by posting here
>>41074004i look like a man in all photos
>>41073438>>41073461please stop being abusive. it doesn't "prove" anything.
>>41074146abuse yourself into a fucking hole in the ground, thanks
>>41073461yeah, imagine
I’m okI’m healthyI’m aliveI’m happyI live the worldNature is beautifulI love myselfI like being myselfI’m a manI like going bald it’s being matureI like growing old as a manI’m gonna be ok!
lol I'm bald and dying alone and nothing is ever going to be okay
>>41074154this is how you make me feel
>>41074196he/him*
Some people just dieBillions of people died with no dreamsIt’s naturalAccept itAccept you are just unluckyIt’s not justice or anythingNothing at allJust you were at the right place at the right time for your life to mean nothing and cut short earlyI’m ready
why did i bother to give you another chance so many times i'm starting to lose count
oh good here we go again
>>41074196ABUSE BEGETS ABUSEwe literally cannot stop unless one of us breaks the cycle by dying we will always hurt people
do i deserve love despite being an ugly man
i want to hug a fat guynot like in a sexual way but like it wouldn’t matter if it was sexual i’m a FUBlover TMI?IDKi want to date a guy that’s nice to me but that’s hard i’m kind of ugly too or not kind of i’m ugly but like thats alright i’m more worried about being a tranny that’s pretty lame it’s alright though i have pretty weird dreams about trannyism like girlmoding and that speaking about self harm i also burned myselfand i play first person shooters i’m freakin manbrained that’s okay though also holland you shouldermog me sooooonevah detroon anyways diary’s over did you guys like it? ummmm i did i think its really good
i am showing them how you treat meso hopefully someone can tell me it isn't all in my head and i don't feel alone in this like i'm going crazy>>41074220i didn't abuse you and no one has to die
>>41074209why did anyone bother to give you a chance, let alone more than one
(You)
this but with a decrepit malformed body
>>41074226block them and move on with you are life sis
There is no herThere is nothing I’m deadI died when I was 12 in my parents bed choking on pillows with my hands gasping at the ropes that I tied around my face
>>41074060real>>41074221yes of course. being ugly doesn’t mean you don’t deserve love
>>41074250>being ugly doesn’t mean you don’t deserve lovelollmao
>>41074240it was the best relationship i never had during the first weekand usually when we get back together it's good again for a whileif she would just stop we could both be happy together
>>41074261kys
>>41074258do you intend on repeating that pattern forever or do you want to be happy
>>41074258please seriously consider suicide
>>41074263struck a nerve
>>41074252i’m sincere! i don’t mean that like, random specific people are obligated to love you romantically, but as long as you’re not evil i think everyone deserves love, platonic and romantic
>>41074289you funny guy
>>41074289i am evil thoughi have a penis and a 32" underbust
yay home from work i didn't eat all day and i slept like shit last night
here we fucking go again
>>41074313*makes you a sandwich with your least favorite ingredients* hiii
>>41074270i want to be happy but it's her that has to change not memaybe if i show other people she'll see how ridiculous it looks and stop
>>41074295i’m not really that funny :( i try really hard but my jokes fall flat pretty often>>41074302neither of those things make you evil
>>41074323it looks like she's just going to keep telling you to kys so that's working fine i guess
shouldve ended when she called you an ugly sissy ngl
>>41074323ur a narcissist and a manipulator
>>41074282yeah bootlickers give me the ick
>>41074444the bootl ick?
>>41074472the kitchen kaboodle ick
>>41074479it’s it kitten kaboodle?
i guess i gotta start acting like a capslock using abusive psycho to get a gf
>>41074595>gf
>>41074595everyone knows girls only like assholes
>>41074335she literally got back with me multiple times just to restart this shit, tooshe said she'd changeshe keeps saying i "don't listen" and "didn't answer the question" but refuses to rephrase the question or repeat what i didn't hear became i'd know "if i'd listened". i asked her to stop yelling son she just cried instead but it's the same shit about how i'm "lying" and "don't listen" and "don't care"so i was gonna leave her apartment trying to take a break but she felt hurt by that so i stayed and she woke me up at night to say i crossed a boundary by licking her arm in my sleep and then got mad in the morning when i was leaving to see my family and demanded a date. after i left i gave her a date and time over text and she said no. why is she like this and why is she gaslighting me and refusing to acknowledge it and get mad when i tell others how she treats me? she texts me walls of "FUCK YOU" text over and over and over again just like she used to but also says she changed for the better by not yelling (she cries at me instead) and i "punished" her for it. she also is mad i asked her not to cry at me while accusing me of weird vague shit like "you don't listen" and "you don't care" and "you lied". and she keeps saying stuff like "you didn't answer my question" but also "how is that controlling" when i explain she uses yelling, crying, demanding i answer questions (if i do answer she'll say it's a "response" that doesn't actually "adress the question" (and if i ask her why she downgraded my answer to a response she'll say she didn't downgrade it ())). and if i use the wrong word like asking if i'm avoiding the question she'll say she never said i'm avoiding the question just that i didn't answer it (very pedantic and combative) and then ask me if i know the difference between avoiding and doing (condescending) and then get mad if i don't answer her new (rhetorical, annoying) question.
>>41074626didn't read, nobody cares liar
i made a single 4chan post and she asked "do you get anything out of that" and i was confused by the vague question and she said it wasn't vague it was broad. she said i didn't answer the question repeatedly even after i did she said it wasn't an answer it was a response. she also was clearly already mad when she asked in the question which is why in hesitated to answer but she denies that. i also eventually answered "yes" (whatever that means in respomse to such a "broad" question) and she's still mad about me "not answering" even though i answered
>>41074626date me instead
>>41074634what if anything about that post is untrue? am i going insane? please someone tell me it's not all in my head and she really is being abusive
so what am i just supposed to cry and cut myself every day until i get ffs in like five years
>>41074725yeah she's abusive
>>41074725>she really is being abusiveno shit but >>41074340
>>41074725she's abusive and you're not a narc nor a manipulator
she still says i don't listenidk what it even meansshe yells it at meshe cries it at meshe gets mad when i ask for examplesi get scared to ask her to repeat herself is she says something and i don't hear it the first time>>41074659okay wya>>41074340>ur a narcissist and a manipulatorhow
>>41074771>wyasouth east for now
i keep wanting to make a long vent post but then i think of picrel and decide against it
>>41074810do it pleASE i wont bully you i promnise
chat is it normal to feel sickly and tired all the time?
>>41074771maybe the thought is that you’re giving her extra chances to be the victim and weaponize that victimhood for sympathy or something?
>>41074810just post the image with your vent post and it becomes ironic and self aware, thereby deflecting criticism
>>41074838no but besides the million reasons this could happen maybe both your e and t are low that can really do that
>>41074805idk if i should start dating right away but maybe we could hang out it would be nice to talk to another manmoderhttps://discord.gg/4RAfVzdBbtw my bank account is so low so another reason we can't really date normally but we can hang out and manmode idk
>>41074626>also says she changed for the better by not yelling (she cries at me instead) and i "punished" her for itwhen someone fucks up and apologizes and tries to do better so you yell at them that you're sick of their shit and to stop crying and cry later instead so you don't have to deal with it because they're hurt you don't understand them, after refusing to answer a question and admitting yourself you were avoiding it after accusing me of saying you were avoiding it when I was simply pointing out that you weren't answering it? and I'm the one "gaslighting" you over... what? you not listening as a habitual problem that comes up constantly in small ways and sometimes boils over?>>41074771you ignore what I say and substitute shit you made up, usually based on your insecurities, and that fucking hurt but you didn't careI don't know why I fell for this just like the first time when you literally broke up with me over nothing then dumped all our shit on 4chan, now here we are again against my better judgement because I let you manipulate me with your fucking beggingremember that you chose this and made it clear you never actually cared about or wanted me you fucking liar
>>41074900have a terrible life with you repressor cousin!
Can a manmoder wear earmuffs or is that way too gay
>>41074805>another one falling for the venus flytrap
>>41074805run the fuck away dude
>>41074915no theyre cuteand gay is ok if youre on e
>>41074828please don’t >>41074888i was also considering this >>41074838no, if you have the time and money maybe see a doctor, or take a multivitamin to see if it’s a simple deficiency
>>41074913wrong cousin btwi have multiplein your own words, "why did you assume something instead of just listening"? see how rude that is over a small mistake? especially if you cry or scream it? maybe now you understand why i left you. not because i "don't care" or was "lying" about being attracted to you. not because we were "never" in a relationship in the first place and all the other stuff you say to practically force me to break up with you
>>41074949>look what you made me do
>>41074900not even a manmoder
starving yourself is based, actually
>>41074963hmm cisf? cism? chaser? boymoder? im 24 MtX any pronounsno job, no degree, no friends, no passport no license, no car, living in parents' basement as a permaogremodernet worth $21.39 and a bike3 years 10 months HRT
>>41074955that is the kind of thing you'd say to mejustifying yelling and crying and getting mad at me for wanting to go home (i was planning on coming back but you got so mad i don't want to anymore)like, isn't me being independent healthy? i thought we talked about giving you breaks when you get in those moods?
the full body funhouse mirror in my room keeps me humble
>>41075091
>>41075101now THISTHIS is art
i hope the methy chuddy saga ends like the daria thing
>>41074318i went to the store and got some jalapeno and cheese brats then cooked them in chili oil it was good.
>>41075063wow thats gonna be me in a year :)life gets better right guys!!!!
>>41074911>caps lock for both of youanyway, it’s really weird to see both sides of this relationship drama on the same thread. please take it off 4chan lol, i’m sure you two would be better off without a bunch of spectators >>41074963another fakemoder in mmg >:(
>>41075128>relationship dramait's notnever wasjust a one-sided misunderstanding
>me when i don't have an anger problem>rips up my ex's stuff and posts it onlineidk maybe just throw it away normally? or give the book to Powell's and the dress to Goodwill? you got mad i was leaving because i was "packing up everything". i told you i was hoping to come back and left some things. you accused me of lying. but i did leave some things. i did want to come back. now i don't because of your childish behavior
>I DON'T WANT THAT>PLEASE>PLEASE>does it
you call everyone fakemoder faggotjust another manifestation of the rampant reddit hugboxing here
>>41075122love that show
>>41075152ok fakemoder
>>41075127it does. mine goes up and down right now i'm in a good spot.
>>41075143>my exyou're not my ex, we were never dating I just fell for your outright lies and manipulation
>>41075158no i mean the trip on this board who got stabbed by her younger t4t gf who then went to prison for assault with a deadly weapon
>>41075150you said you'd stop being abusivei guess we both changed our minds, huh? i wanted you back that time but seeing as you're unwilling to change i'm not going to beg for you back. if you want me back i want to see therapy receipts
>>41075101oh cmon i like detransition baby
>>41075166im literally a massive broad skulled hulking man i am the only realmoder here
>>41075183desu it's kinda mid and the art chudete made out of it and my dress is the magnum opus of our relationship drama so i'll give it a pass
>>41075182I did change my behavior and put in a lot of effort for you, but you actively punished me for itwhy are you still doing this? you "broke up" with me over nothing the first time, I yelled and kicked you out the second time, and now you've officially "broken up" with me - there's nothing to get back
>>41075196what relationship? you worming your way into my life and my bed and fucking with me was not a relationship, it was me being lonely and thinking I found someone I could relate to because I'm hopelessly naive
>>41075179t4t is cursedonly bipedos are worth a try and then you have to hope he wont troon out
i am the bipedo who trooned out
>>41075179messed up can't imagine hurting my girlfriend even in kink stuff
>>41075249this
>>41075248hope you were single and didnt trick some poor tranny to waste her time with you
>>41075200>you "broke up" with me over nothing the first time,you said yourself>you were still mad about a previous argumentyou later also did similar things where you get mad when i leave or visit family. also it wasn't nothing you said you "gave up" on me and then when i asked if i should take all my things i did. also you did yell at me. you almost always do. and like actually screaming at the top of your lungs in a way i never do. you literally hurt your voice so bad you mute your mic at work. that first breakup is when the yelling started and i left because you practically drove me out after snapping at me and you're still gaslighting me about it. also you immediacy posted on 4chan after that me leaving proved you right. right about what? i enjoyed spending time with you when you weren't on your fucking bpd period
>>41075190you wish nigga
>>41074917>>41074922what
>>41075125cool i bought 40 mini corn dogs and i'm gonna eat them all today with mustard just like in elementary school
>>41075267will one of you 2 go and shoot musk?
>>41075267I only yelled like that last week, and I only yelled at all the first time because you kept raising your voice and asking me if I was breaking up with you for saying it was good that we not spend literally all of our time together in response to you letting me know you had plans to go see family and come backyeah I'm an abusive asshole and I'm not cut out to be with anyone but you're the one still making shit up and gaslighting me you fucking liar you never wanted to make up you never wanted to come back you had already made up your mind the night before, and I should have never let you back in after we talked on friday and you pulled the pathetic PLEASE shit - I was literally preparing myself to have a calm and polite disengagement without any further misunderstanding but no just like the first time you fucking BEGGED and I fell for it again because I'm so fucking stupid
I invested so much into you emotionally and personally and this is what I get
>>41075285MR TRUMP THIS ONE RIGHT HERE MR TRUMP DADDY SIR PUNISH HIM
>>41075280sounds comfy, enjoy!
>>41075317feed them to me
>>41075285that would be so based but I could never
https://strawpoll.com/BDyNzoEDOyR
>>41075354nothing to go back to don't kid
>>41075341nope i'm eating sweet tarts now and sitting around topless cuz the bra had to go.
>>41075354you said the same thing last time though....
>>41075365
I'd rather kill myself than spend more time being gaslit and manipulated by someone who never loved me
>>41075303>you never wanted to make upwe did so enough times i lost count>had already made up your mind the night beforei didn't which is why i offered to make coffee but you never clearly said yes and then got angry at me for not making it. you also asked me a series of increasing hostile questions and demanded i answer. you wanted a date and even time i would be back and when i gave you one i said noyou also said to drop the argument but then brought it up again when you shifted around in bed and i was sleepy and licked your arm like i often do without thinking and you got weird and said i crossed a sexual boundary. and then i asked if you wanted me on the bed or couch and you wouldn't answer. and you say i'm the one pretending to be attracted to you?
>>41075371>>41075360
>>41075376i clearly wanted to cuddle with you i was crying and begging you to cuddle with meyou were waking me up at night and saying i was giving mixed signals and talking to me very mean and angry
>>41075265ive never been in a relationship in my life and now i definitely never will
let the right one in is awesome
>>41075377this was after we spent the day arguing and you said, verbatim, while yelling>I'm sick of your shit>why don't you cry later, when I don't have to deal with it?prior to going on a schizophrenic rant prefacing it all with "maybe" as some kind of sick insurance against me being able to believe or take seriously anything you said about being a drug addict or self-hating and avoiding the question and not listening because you have brain damage or are just absent-minded so you could technically deny it all later the same way you lied by omission about being fucking embarrassed of me - I thought it was gracious to just try and go to bed normally and want to talk in the morningI mean I lay in bed all fucking night staring at the ceiling then you woke me up with that shit what was I supposed to do you literally have no self-control of yourself, at least I do most of the time until I get emotional>>41075392I PUT MY ARM AROUND YOU YOU STUPID FUCK AND YOU DID GIVE ME MIXED SIGNALS AND I TOLD YOU AND KEEP TELLING YOU I'M TOO AUTISTIC TO DEAL WITH MIXED SIGNALS AND AMBIGUITY
>>41075374i took this when i got home b4 it got thrown in the hamper.
the most autistic tranny in history vs the most bpd tranny today
>>41075430 when do i stop having conetits
>>41075456when you get a ba
>>41075456i dunno since swapping from sublingual pills to injections mine are kinda growing really fast
>>41073542yes and it wasn't even what I yelled at her over, I yelled over her getting defensive and telling me I was being "too supportive" and snapping at me for offering the advice she asked for and encouraging her one way or another to do it or not because she was too embarrassed over not thinking something through
>>41075466been on mono een the whole time and my shit is pyramidal lmao
>>41075190>i am the only realmoder sounds like you’re hugboxing now>>41075170your texts talk about demoting your relationship to a friendship. sounds like you are/were dating>>41075248i am the father who stepped up>>41075249me either. my high school ex wanted me to and i just couldn’t bring myself to hurt him, physically or emotionally. didn’t stop him from punching my balls and enjoying it lol>>41075280based, corn dogs are awesome. don’t think i’ve ever had 40 minis in a sitting, but i think i’ve gotten up to 20 or 25 once or twice
>>41075470>mono eentry sublingual for a bit, no shit
>>41075470i think pills help with a foundation something about high e1 helping and now my e2 high enough to cause growth
>>41074196>>41070024>lesbians
it's a "narrowly evaded a panic attack by taking mom's ativan" kinda dayi miss when i used to take benzos for FUN
i was supposed to be a midshit twinkhon passoid not a lateshit no-hips forevermoder BTW.
>>41075470can i see i'm intrigued
>you're too supportive>I'm sick of your shit>cry later so I don't have to deal with itwait who was the abuser
i kinda want this to end in a suicide pact
>>41075516me, an unrelated third party
>>41075393just because these two are dysfunctional doesn’t mean all relationships are. my best friends have been dating for like 7 years and (from the outside) seem to rarely if ever have drama between them. both of my relationships have been nice for the most part too>>41075470ev instead of een but yeah. feels like you hear more about good results from switching to injections to something else than being on injections the whole time, which i hope is just me having confirmation bias
>>41075415>maybe i'm brain damaged>maybe i'm absent minded>mahbe i'm a drug addictyeah i'm an abuse victim and you gaslit me into hating myself>you woke me up with that shit what was I supposed to do you literally have no self-control of yourselfi was literally having a nice dream and cuddling with you so i licked your arm. sorry for liking you?>I thought it was gracious to just try and go to bed normally and want to talk in the morningyou woke me up at 3am saying random shit when all i did was cuddle with and lick you. why?
i've only ever been in absolute trainwreck relationships in my life and these niggas blow my shit out of the waterliterally can't imagine this level of miscommunication and open vitriol in a relationship
>>41075536how did I gaslight you into hating yourself? you post and talk constantly about how self-hating you are and I only ever tried to build you up, because I was attached and I wanted to be with someone who could be independent and self-confident in the ways I've tried to be despite myself and my obvious fucking issues>sorry for liking you?>all i did was cuddle with and lick youis that why you said you were sick of my shit and told me to not cry in front of you? do you not see how fucking torturous those kinds of mixed signals are? I was completely silent except for giving you water and making sure you had what you needed, I was even the one who asked if you should eat something before you got up and did, because I just wanted to not have to deal with anything for the night and take time to talk about it the next day without dealing with messy interactions and you pushing boundaries when I was clearly through my direct words and actions and through obvious indirect cues still intensely uncomfortable with the situationsI have to go through my fucking day on 2 hours of sleep now after not eating yesterday or fixing my fucking curtains because you wouldn't let me even drop it after I kept asking and trying to
damn, bump limit in like 17 hours, good job dysfunctional relationship havers
>>41075505im fuckedunsee cc/album#blUE2RDNB0KV
>>41075415i'm sorry for getting out of bed to eat but i didn't have dinneryou were the one staring at the ceiling and being mean to meyou have been cruel to me for about 16 house straighti'm going to go suck off homeless people for meth in the bushesor rape theyfabs and steal and sniff your partiesor commit crimes and laugh and gloat and shoot up heroin and break windowsbecause you're mean. i'm going to have sex with someone way older and someone way younger. i'm going to build a time machine. because that's what you apparently think i do anyway so i might as well
>>41075535>just because these two are dysfunctional doesn’t mean all relationships are.idc about that im undateable bc i mutilated my body with estrogen lmao
>>41075565>I only ever tried to build you upthe big lieyou told me i don't listenyou call me retarded fagyou say fuck yousay i gloator you're worried i commit crimes to Anne Frank but i am not Hitler
>>41075571GETTING OUT OF BED WAS NOT THE PROBLEM WHY WOULD THAT HAVE BEEN THE PROBLEMI WAS NOT BEING MEAN BY MULLING OVER THE WHOLE OF ALL THE SHIT YOU SAID TO ME AND TRYING TO THINK ABOUT WHETHER THERE WAS ANY FUTURE BETWEEN USAND YOU WANTED TO DO ALL THOSE THINGS ANYWAY AND JOKED ABOUT LYING TO ME ABOUT IT FUCK YOU YOU MANIPULATIVE ENTITLED SHIT>>41075582YOUDON'TFUCKINGLISTEN
please post pics when you start meth again I need a laugh
>>41075580i feel that way sometimes too (and because of my general personality) but i really don’t think it’s true for us
>>41075569how long hrt
>>41075569mogs me
>>41075606a year my transition is basically bricked
>>41075610have you tried progesterone
>>41075619not yet its so fucking expensive
6 figures6 feet6 inches0 bitches
>>41075624i use depo provera instead.
>>41075624raw progestrone is not too bad from purplepanda
prog only gave acne and bo
prog filled out my boobs a lot but they're still puffy tanner 4 looking cones
>>41075565>you wouldn't let me even drop it after I kept asking and trying toi asked before bringing it up againyou didn't>I was completely silent except for giving you waterwas i supposed to stay there and take that shit? the silent treatment? when you're the abusive one and still are?>is that why you said you were sick of my shit and told me to not cry in front of you? do you not see how fucking torturous those kinds of mixed signals are?that was hours before and we had since calmed down and agreed to move on. also i only say that because you'll cry at me while accusing me of things then get mad when i don't break down and agree with your assessment i don't listen. you cry at me while saying insane shit and that wasn't the first time. remember when you threw a tissue at me? and that's when i was trying to comfort you. but the gloves are off. fuck off and get over me. you repeatedly asked me this morning to "rip the bandaid off" and said "NO" to the date i offered and told me i'm never coming back and ripped up my dress and book i left specifically so you wouldn't think i'm leaving forever and freak out like you too often do. but you freaked out anyway. signal received. we're done. you're the one who hasn't been loving toward me. you remind me of the people i used to smoke meth with. unbothered by or in denial of the worst of their problems, but snapping over the smallest things. and always screaming and yelling and crying and delusional and paranoid about people "lying" and "not listening" and getting mad and throwing away or ripping stuff up. backing me physically into corners. showing off your gun and shit. you haven't ever even fired it. why would two suicidal trannies live together with a gun? you don't even carry it when you go out. you don't have a safe or anything it's just always out and it's fucking weird especially after you said last time you freaked out in thread you'd put a hole through me maybe with your bare hands or something
you two are so boring
>>41075565>is that why you said you were sick of my shit and told me to not cry in front of youdamn messed up
>>41075689I was silent because you TOLD ME TO NOT CRY IN FRONT OF YOU so I was keeping my shit together and not starting more dramayou literally do not listen and are making shit up even now fuck you you lying piece of shit when you beg again I'm ignoring you
anyone have a cock i can suck? or free drugs to experiment on me with? plz i am so lonely>>41075584sorry for being attracted to you? sorry you're delusional and repeatedly accuse me of lying, not caring and not listening?
what am I delusional about you liaryou SAID those things TO ME VERBATIM
>>41075707>you told me something>i will missunderstand it>no i won't let you explain>let me strip the contexti given you nothing to cry about you just have a mental breakdown and get mad if i try to help, mad if i try to leave, and mad if i ask you to stop. all while accusing me of bullshit and centering your delusional pain to ignore my pain which is actually caused by your actions, not your insecurities and delusions>>41075723>you said not to cry once when i was losing my shit>i'll hate you foreveryou were crying AT ME
>>41075700imagine someone yelling that at you while you're sobbing because they don't understand what you're trying to tell them and you're refusing to answer their question
>>41075746>you're refusing to answer their questionwell other way around you get the pointI'm too autismal and traumatized and stupid for this teenage drama and I don't know what the fuck I was thinking
>>41075745literally still lying and making shit up, will you ever stop?>crying AT MEyou are SICK
>>41075746i never yelled at you the way you yelled at mefalse equivalenceyou scream at the top of your lungs while backing me into a corneri raise my voice to be heard above the demonic manipulation and sobbing and accusations
>>41075773I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS THE SAME YOU RETARD
>>41075775daddy chill
>>41075782kill yourself
here's a note from back in July:How do I start listening to her? I feel like my brain is too small to remember everything she says24NB 36NB I never fucking listen to her. my girlfriend apologized for yelling at me i told her she didn't seem sorry because she's not actually going to change she yelled at me in response she's probably going to see this post and maybe break up with me over it or get mad that i assume she's going to break up any advice? worried.
>>41075785do you have any recommended methods
niggas be real demons
>>41075792slit your wristsslam your head into concreteplay grab the gun with a police officer
>>41075812can you be more specific
>>41075821?
>she gets mad at me for assuming things even if the assumption is correct [example: me assuming that you're mad about something when you obviously are and will later admit you were mad] the only thing that works is being more submissive, begging, and agreeing with her word-for-word [screenshots available] (if i use a synonym or change the word order she gets mad and says i'm not listening) it makes her like me more but then she gets mad and says i'm parroting her and to stop acting like an abusive victim, then she applogizes and says she doesn't want to be like her mom, and she just wants to be understood, because i'm not listening to her. but at least it's better than disagreeing with her, or even agreeing with her but not remembering the word order or accidentally using a synonym because she says it reinforces that she's right i'm not listening to her because the synonym changes the meaning. and some people might say she seems abusive and, yeah, sure, she's kinda crazy but i'm crazy too and idk what i'd do without her. she doesn't like it if i suggest getting a therapist, or a third person to mediate [whether it's 4chan, a therapist, or my cousin, you get mad either way]. she REALLY hates it if i ask for help online and actively monitors certain websites or something but i guess i'll post here? she basically makes all the money and i make dinner and stuff so she really doesn't need me like i need her and i feel like i like her more than she likes me i feel like she blames me for everything because i never listen but if i say that she'll get mad and say she never blamed me. if i apologize she gets mad and says she never asked me to apologize. she says stuff like i'm a red flag or we're not compatible but then gets mad if i ask if we're breaking up but then says we might break up. [once again today i didn't want to break up but you said we weren't together]the noted in brackets is stuff i added lateryou never changedyour behavior is unacceptable
>>41075825i dont do well with so many options
>>41075828THE ASSUMPTION WAS NOT CORRECTYOU ARE LYINGI DID CHANGEAND YOU ACTIVELY, DELIBERATELY, HURT ME FOR ITI NEVER SAID TO NOT TALK TO ANYONE I ASKED YOU TO NOT AIR OUR SHIT OUT ON 4CHAN WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU
SUBMISSIVE PEOPLE MAKE ME FUCKING SICK
I DIDN'T WANT ANY OF THIS SHIT YOU ARE MAKING UP AND ASSERTINGYOU ARE AN ETERNAL VICTIM AND HAVE SO MUCH FUCKING TRAUMA AND INSECURITY YOU CAN'T EVEN HEAR WHAT PEOPLE SAY TO YOU
i have a bpd diagnosis on my record but im way more normal than either of these ppl lmao
what is going on in here holy traumaslop
>>41075839weren't you the one that aired it out first
>do you get anything out of that?>huh? what?>answer the question>no? what? reword it? wdym?>i can't reword it. you're refusing to answer>okay. my answer is yes.>you didn't answer my questioncrazyyyy (inb4 denial/that's not an exact transcript of our 8 hour argument therefore you're lying)i did eventually answer your vague question in its original form with a simple yes.>>41075839>I DID CHANGEthis is like when you yelled at me "I'M SORRY FOR YELLING!!1">>41075901yeah, kinda. i admittedly did post screencaps first but only to show a sane person what i'm dealing with here
>>41075689>remember when you threw a tissue at me?>>41075782damn, reminds me of high school when my one friend could recreate it perfectly>>41075812the last is always tempting>>41075837don’t actually kill yourself. if you’re trans you have to live
my point is you cry at me, blame me for making you cry because i don't care don't listen and other accusations, and then lash out if i try to comfort you, and also if i try to leave.
>>41075901no I made an indirect vague post, here >>40477395>>41075917might be nice if you stopped literally demonstrating the exact thing I took issue with months ago and kept talking to you about while gaslighting me into thinking I did something wrong because you dodged a question, but oh well we all live in hell!I promise to ignore you the next time you beg so this never happens again
"cry at me" is crazyyyy ngl
can we wrap it up b4 the next one im getting kinda anxious u stupid whores
cant wait for the next episode desu
>>41075986cut a bit to relax :3
>>41075940how the FUCK did I cry AT you? how is that a THING? you sound so fucking sick in the head right now dude like this is making me really wonder if I ever did grow that spine like I tried to, no matter how fucked up or abusive and loud and monstrous I got this is actually insane to me, go talk to a therapist yourself you fucking psycho>blame me for making you cry because i don't care don't listenwhen I say something and minutes or hours later you say something indicating you don't recall or never heard it, OVER and OVER, it feels like you are simply NOT LISTENING and DO NOT CARE - my getting so upset by it is clearly over the top but that is not an abnormal conclusion and I think it's that you don't fucking care about anything in the first place>then lash out if i try to comfort youI threw a tissue at you and I cried very hard over it because you said something mean not comforting, and you left plenty of times even without specific plans with no problem but when you start packing your shit in the middle of a conversation it clearly fucking brings me right back to when you BROKE UP WITH ME OVER NOTHING BUT A GRUMPY TONE AND AGREEING WITH YOU
i would probably taken you back if you>went to therapy>agreed to meet me in public during the day so you can't treat me like shit behind closed doors and trash my things i lose/leave/forget at your place>admit you are wrong to treat me like this>stop telling me i don't care or don't listen>don't cry while being verbally aggressive (it seems manipulative)>>41075954>you dodged a questionthe big question in question:"do you get anything out of that"obviously a bullshit confusing question. i didn't dodge. i answered repeatedly. i tried a short answer (yes). i tried long explanations (you said i was assuming too much about your broad question)this is like the saucehave fun with your sauces and question, saucy riddlerblame me for everythingyou're fucking insanestop playing victim. i'm gone. you had your rippy dress show and tell. your safe now from me. the horrible drug addict lying abuser who never listens and definitely drinks way less than you. enjoy the liver failure
being called hot by someone who calls you a girl but is obviously only attracted to men is soul destroying
>>41076005dont need a beautiful woman to tell me that right away
>>41076020I never said it was not wrong to yell at you or accuse you of things you didn't do, but you literally do not listen>obviously a bullshit confusing questionNOIT WAS NOTdie a sad lonely death in a ditch when you get kicked out you piece of shit
>>41076005god shut up with that
SHUT UPTHIS ISNT GROUP THERAPYWELL IT ISBUT FOR TRANSEXUALS WHO PRESENT AS MENNOT COUPLE THERAPY.....Desu today i will take cutie chudettes sideBecause if i was in a relationship with him i would get him help instead of airing his dirty laundry all over the internet... Meth schizo do better sis, you are claiming he isn;t mature yet you are being very horrible posting your texts onlineHow is he supposed to trust you if you violate his trust like this....Mind you i see your frustrations and can sympathize but like........ ugh grow up bitch
>>41076032yay>>41076047no :3 cutters rights are human rights
i don't present as a man thoughbeit, im only here because mtfg ia clique-y
>>41076016>how the FUCK did I cry AT you? how is that a THING?>"you don't listen bwa haa haa haa haa" and i'm just trying to talk to you and answer your questions and you keep interrupting. and i'm like okay the thing i did wrong was— "bwa haa haa huu huu hu hu i didn't say you did anything wrong [breaks down]"like if i did nothing wrong why the flooding spamming crying staring going silent? why not cuddling me in bed? but also getting mad when i start leaving like? make up your mind?>i cried more therefore i am the victimno. fuck you. you tell at me and swear at me and call me names and i never cried except when you didn't cuddle me and also in private.
>>41075986agreed, i was getting so many (you)s before we started getting both sides to the relationship drama :(>>41076005to the girl reading this: do not cut
>>41076074>im only here because mtfg ia clique-ythey just hide it better here
i fuck women btw icl anymore
I guess I would never have taken you back if you hadn't begged because I genuinely felt bad, that's my problem is I have empathy still it even causes me to overreacted to moods and emotions in others because I feel bad they're hurting and sometimes I even make it worsecursed existence>>41076083I CUDDLED WITH YOU I PUT MY ARM AROUND YOU WHY ARE YOU STILL DOING THIS WHY ARE YOU LYING>i cried more therefore i am the victimWHO SAID THISI SURE DIDN'TWHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE CRYING IS A BAD THING AND STILL TRYING TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD FOR BEING HURT AND CRYING THIS IS SO FUCKING SICK WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
>>41076016>you don't remember literally everything i said while crying and babbling for a 16 hour mental breakdown>YOU HATE ME WAAAAAA WAAAAAAAAAAA>BROKE UP WITH ME OVER NOTHING BUT A GRUMPY TONE AND AGREEING WITH YOUagreeing with me? i just said imma seenmy family and you were like (maximum snark) good, because maybe we shouldn't spend literally all our time together. so i asked if you wanted to spend less time or break up because you were being mean out of nowhere when i had stepped naked out of the shower and just relayed info i had from my senpai. and for the crime of asking if we were spending too much time together you started crying and yelling and swearing. so i asked if we were breaking up and i should leave and you said yes
>>41076099giwtwm maybe I should go t4c
>>41076134you asked several times even after I said no and then I finally got fed up and started yelling and said yes, real sick shit to keep pushing your bullshit narrative when you can't remember what happened 3 months or 3 minute ago
just injected #letsgo
>>41076151oh shit i just remembered i forgot my injection last night, gotta make up for it soon. thanks nona!
In other news i got a binder you guys it was so great i was so confident in gym class ;D wow i was completely fat and i'm DD
>>41076156inject double or else
>>41076156tomorrow is injection day... what if I skipped it and stopped my "transition" and gave up on life and quit my job and rotted until I was out of money then killed myself?
>>41076157get. a. bra.
>>41076157>beeing comfident as a malei wish i had no dysphoria as well
>>41076166Nah you should save up for a down payment on a house to mog everyone and buy iron heart jeans
>>41076157I go out with my sports bra that doesn't conceal anything and I'm perfectly confident in my manhood
>>41076151based I guess
>>41076175BaitU think i would feel more comfortable at college as a hon !? of course looking closer to FTM feels better than looking MTF you retard>>41076173Too big for bra to hide anything
>>41076164i’ll probably just inject the normal amount and get my schedule back on track as soon as i can. usually i inject at like 1 or 2 am, so maybe i’ll do like 6pm tonight, then as soon as i wake up in 5 days, then back on track with 1 or 2 am>>41076166minus stopping the transition this is just my current life
>>41076037>you literally do not listenyou're still doing it>NO>IT WAS NOT"do you get anything out of that" (obviously angry tone, BPD autistic abusive heavily armed troon, swiveling in gamer chair to state you down sitting next to gun, has yelled at you and threatened you countless times)>uhm... what do you mean (unsure now to answer without setting you off further)>i meant what i said? don't you listen?>okay what's your goal with the question like what's your real question please rephrase>i can't rephrase and my goal is for you to answer there is no wrong answer>[long answer]>that's not an answer that's a response>yes is my answer. does that answer your question or do you feel like i'm avoiding it>i never said you were avoiding it i said you didn't answer it>but i just did? aren't you being pedantic?>no you didn't answer so you even know the difference between do and avoid>why are you being condescending>answer the question. what's the difference between "do" and "avoid"that's roughly what happened. every good faith thing i say is met with hostility. like that time you googled the word "snap" to prove i snapped because i "didn't know the definition" you stopped yelling but you literally do all the things that accompany the yelling, such as being a fucking asshole for one. if you actually loved me you wouldn't turn on me on a dime
>>41076189don't hide
>>41076230I thought it would be easier but i can't handle all the stares and zoomer boys giggling at me
>>41076265 >>41076265 >>41076265
>>41076100>I would never have taken you back if you hadn't beggedfunny how i have to beg and grovel when you're the one who gaslights, yells, is controlling, and spams "FUCK YOU" at meway to treat me as an equaleven when you tried to apologize you couldn't resist justifying your abuse by saying i what? forget things sometimes? misunderstand you unintentionally? sometimes mishear or don't hear?>i make a small mistake to unintentionally hurt you one>you do multiple things to intentionally hurt me for hours or daysno one else ever told me as many times as you to "listen". and remember yelling at me over the phone too? when i called to apologize for "not listening" (some vague thing you gaslit me into believing i do). you screamed at me. fuck you. you are are horrible, abusive piece of shit. that was your last chance. if i take you back again i'll be afraid you'll fucking kill me or yourself. i can't do this anymore
>>41076215one of the first things I asked you was if you were ok with me having a gun around because I keep it on hand since I've had people literally fucking threaten to kill me for being a tranny even in my old apartment and I never showed it off or brandished it or threatened anything with it, but clearly I shouldn't have had it around you and I was probably putting you and I at risk...also it was "not do" and "avoid" as in I didn't think you were actively avoiding the question I thought you were misunderstanding then answering other things, despite what you said, and the question was perfectly reasonable in the context and what I wanted which was a conversation to help understand you and your perspective betterfuck me for trying to do better I guess but this is what you chose
>>41076283>i can't do this anymoregooddon'tfuck you for stringing me along you lying piece of shitbtw: you don't listen
>>41076189you already are a fetishist rapehon in mind so why not in body?
>>41076156turns out i misremembered my calendar, today was my injection day, so i ended up just injecting a couple hours early. c’est la vie, no biggie ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
>>41076179why iron heart jeans? and in this market lol, even making ok money for my age and considering how much of a fuckup I've been I don't think I'll be a homeowner in my lifetime
why does mmg always have 2 threads are you guys dumb?
