"Next Generation" editionPrevious: >>24845792/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQRESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvCPlease limit excerpts to one post.Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.(And maybe double-space your WIPs to allow edits if you want 'em.)Simple guides on writing:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9shttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFkThread theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZowTbT6hy3k
The waves slowly creep upon the shore, depositing their salt. I seek to chase after them but they continually slip away from my fingers. Why do they flee? I know not. I care not. I shall set my sail against your withdrawing advances until you yield your treasures. With a ravenous tooth shall I pursue you.
thoughbeit may, one dothly ponders, methinks...
>>24848668perchance mayhaps.... a cheers to that old chap...
>>24848667That's pretty gay, dude.
i've come to genuinely appreciate the wildeian approach of writing a dialogue between characters in order to present an argument/opinion/philosophy.in another format, like being personal, the shit i'm currently writing would come across as incredibly preachy and self absorbed. like i'm lecturing someone who doesn't care. self help type shit. i'm better than you type shit.framing in presentation is insanely important.
>>24848679you're pretty low iq
>>24848680duh. the only reason to write is so people pay you to say shit you'd get punched for saying to them in a normal conversation.
>>24848680>type shit>type shitAre you a nigger? If so, a pseudoanonymous website is one of the few opportunities that you have to not be thought of as one and you've spoiled it. If not, then why would you choose to emulate an ignorant pidgin of English in a thread dedicated to writing on a board dedicated to literature? There's no excuse for this kind of behavior.
>>24848700>>24848705ok what the heck are you guys attempting to even contribute here
>>24848720fr fr?
unc is tweaking again
Fine fine, I'll post the first two pages of my slop.
>>24848720i thought i was agreeing with you...
>>24848742didn't you finish this book ages ago?
>>24848720Nigger diction interdiction.
>>24848744sorry bro i don't agree that the only reason to write is to be payed for saying shit people would take violence to you for in person.
>>24848745yes. i can still post it though
>>24848752>i'm currently writing incredibly preachy and self absorbed i'm better than you type shit.>sorry bro i don't write shit people would take violence to you for in person.
>>24848763i can post the piece if you want but it's rather rough right now
>>24848765if you want. i'm not entirely sure i need to be preached to at the moment, but i'll give it a fair shake
>>24848777https://sharetext.io/01617de2
>>24848753how many sales have you made? the sample is good.
>>24848779>nigga>nigga>nigga>nigga>nigga
>>24848779its good for the scene of overly-educated preachy friend giving a spiel to someone who will listen. might need to be trimmed down in a final edit though.
>>2484878218 copies. And most of it was free. I think my cover, blurb, and severe lack of advertising killed it. Marketing is hard.
>>24848815let's see the cover
>>24848742Very brave to frontload your story with a ton of words you made up by sticking "mana-" in front of nouns
>>24848779illegible schizobabble
>>24848742i'll suggest a few minor edits>black-stari wouldn't hyphenate here, because it looks weird. either make it one word (blackstar) or two separate words.>and evidence, for her to...i would drop that comma>said suspect. The suspect...i would use "He" instead of repeating suspect there>and on her merry way back homei would simplify it to "on her way home"likewise that sentence after Pine Cantonment can be simplified: "she filed her report and went back to her chair." or something like that. does "appropriate designation" matter? "chair" by itself may be too plain but "big comfortable chair" doesn't sound good either. maybe there's a more specific term you can find for what it is.
>>24848779Bix nood, indeed!
>>24848832I based it on common everyday items we have in our world and our naming conventions. Instead of vehicle, we call it electric vehicle. instead of "spread", we call it a butter-knife, instead of glowing filament glass holder, we call it a "lightbulb". But yes you're not the first to criticize the use of "mana". A reader wanted Sanderson esque names like "sky eels". But I thought it felt more realistic to a world to attach a prefix instead of taking two unrelated items and creating a new "object ". >>24848836blackstar - I think this one grammarly said to hyphenate. I forgot the reason but I didn't really bother mulling over it >Repeat use of suspectFair, but I would change "him" to suspect. She's a cop and can't confirm anything yet, so it's her thought process. The "him" was the mistake. I was thinking "lounger", but big comfortable chair felt more childish and part of the MCs mentality at this point. Nonetheless, the suggestions are noted and I did make a few changes, but I don't think I'll upload the second edition anytime soon. I am working on a second edition to my Chinaman story, which sorely needs it.
>>24848883I can understand writing a world with one or two "mana-" things but you took it a little too far
>>24848779This is a joke right? We're being punk'd right?
>>24848688Why is this phenotype so common in America?
>>24848894
>>24848883Compound words>A large market>Supermarket >Box that holds mail>MailboxSo a conduit that uses mana, a mana conduit A bus that uses mana a manabus , no need to call it anything else. A bus that uses electricity, an electric bus, diesel bus, natural gas bus. At least that was the thinking behind the words.
>>24848883>it felt more realistic to a worldNigger, your writing fantasy not a documental, throw "muh realism" away and choose what sounds better
>>24848902Mmm how about mananduit? To make it slightly dumber.
>>24848890Fair enough. The setting in the story is about mana taking over a medival world, and transforming it, like the oil to the industrial revolution. So the characters are navigating this new technology introduced by the villain. And like oil, all the environmental issues come with it. Nothing preachy, but it's hinted at the tech is causing monsters and new tech makes new monsters, etc. If anything I should have worked in the setting better, but I am a shit writer that didn't world build enough
>>24848912Nta but that sounds dumber. WTF is a manaduit? I know what a conduit is, I know what mana is. The word defines itself. >>24848910It makes for way easier reading than throwing in a bunch of made up words without context. Nobody wants to read a paragraph about "cediyr", and the author is talking about a shoe.
>>24848910Your English is almost as bad as your take here
>>24848910>documentalbuenos dias, amigo
stop being mean.
>/wng/ leaves the thread>immediately dies CURIOUS!
>>24848998
>>24848998it really is a night and day difference
Thinking of blowing a little cash on a 4chan ad for my KDP ebook. I'll target /lit/, but what other boards might be enticed by a slightly surreal, sapphic dark romance? I can only think of /u/ and maybe /x/.
>>24849042>Thinking on wasting money on 4chanRead >>24848382
>>24849042Good idea. Makes the web experience better for us all when the retards publicly announce themselves, so they're easier ignored
>>24849158>anyone smart enough to enjoy a good book is also smart enough to have an adblocker enabled and impossible to market directly toHell of a catch-22, that.>>24849177I'm fine with making myself easy to ignore. The whole idea is you're not supposed to want to ignore me. When I speak softly, you should lean in. When I talk slowly, you should hang on every syllable. I should have but to raise my finger to hush you into silence.
>just need to finish writing>finish writing>yeah i'm not putting this outwhy does this happen
>>24848654>FrankIs that his name? I looked up online but coundn't find his (first) full name mentioned anywhere
Hi, native spanish speaker here. Can you guys explain to me, in other words, why the correct answer is C instead of A? A "sounds" right to me
>>24849303Same thing with this one. He took all the money "sounds" right but it isn't. Why?
>>24849305>>24849303And in both cases, does earlier means "not too long ago"?
>>24849303>>24849305Your question would fit in much better on >>>/int/216373626
>>24849303>Present time>Anon is looking at Clara. Anon is thinking:>I realize now that Clara **has not** changed much since the last time I saw her.Do you understand why I used *has not* and not *is not* ?
>>24849234cus ur chasing quantification and ends instead of engaging in a genuinely meaningful process. there's nothing wrong or inadequate with an unfinished story bro.
>finished a story>mounting regretsDoes it get any easier?
>>24849440Nope
>>24849230No one cares about your self-indulgent fantasy
>>24849305it sounds natural to you because in casual speech people will say that, but it's not formally correct. the point is that the taking happened before the admitting. so>he admitS that he took itwould be correct. he "admits" now that he "took" in the past. but if you move the whole sentence into the past it becomes>he admittED that he HAD TAKEN it"admitting" moves from now to the past, and "taking" moves from the past to an even earlier past. that's what the "had [done]" form indicates here, an even earlier past than the other action.
Any advice on how to write conversations concerning morals without just having two characters talk one after the other?
>https://blog.google/technology/google-labs/pomelli/which one of u will be first to spam us with this ish?
>>24849909you, apparently
My ADHD means I'm slower to develop ideas. There are stories I'm just figuring out after having them cook for a year. Should I develop more at once to make up for this deficit?
>>24849449What a relief, the one I had felt embarrassingly deus ex machina ish because I didn't explain the twist as well as I could have.
>>24849817Either make them argue, or make one character teaching the other one.
>>24849941You can develop more by reading, yeah. Outline/skeleton draft and see where it goes but I'd say reading is more beneficial.
>>24849277we are not carrying that discussion over into this thread. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
>>24849303>>24849305It is no different in Spanish. This is the pluperfect vs preterite. In reality, they are both correct (at least colloquially) in isolation, but depending on the context pluperfect is going to be more correct. Some (hack) writing coaches advise against using pluperfect at all.But to your question about why C is correct, the answer lies with the fact that you saw Clara (past) and the change happened before you saw her (hence pluperfect).Same thing in question 6, "He admitted" means this happened in the past and his action of taking money happened even further in the past (pluperfect).It is no different in Spanish, but there it's called pretérito pluscuamperfecto.
>>24849453You're projecting, anon
>>24850147Yes weWHAT IS GARDNER'S FIRST NAME?WHAT IS GARDNER'S FIRST NAME?I NEED TO KNOW!
>>24850273*are
Do you guys use Vectorpea and Photopea to design your book covers? I've found them to be just as good as the Adobe products. Kind of amazing actually everything you can do just in browser.
>>24850475i used to hate web app shit, but now that i have a real job with a locked down work laptop where i can't install photoshop and it's not a mac so can't use pixelmator, i've realized the appeal of just opening your browser and using some shit. i get that they have to lock down work computers or normies will install a horror show of malware but it's like i actually need photoshop for this project tho. pain point alleviated, thank you entrepreneurs.
>>24848815Your other books at least got some reviews. This one might be too long for what it is (directed at 15-18). Have you thought about cutting it down? I think a lot of your first chapt can be removed. The backstory slows things down and you are probably better off just sticking to the hunt for a while.
>>24850501the youths are spoiled by choices. in my day we had to resort to cracks and keygens
Are villian protagonists viable?In my opinion, villians almost always make poor protagonists... they're just one dimensionally evil and have no morality or struggles. How can you make a protagonist exciting and interesting if they are just boring like villians?
>>24850582
>>24848643What rhetoric and tactics would earth women use to protest something like picrel?I was thinking>They would call earth men who date alien women losers, small-dicked, say they wouldn't want to date a guy like him anyway >They would praise men who date earth women as good guys >They'd spout extremely racist shit about alien women and laugh at any negative dating experience a man has with aliens I wanted the more liberal political party to support working with the alien women, while the more conservative political party wants to restrict it. Would women suddenly flip and become conservative to protect access to partners?
>>24850582Just because a villain has no moral struggle does not mean he faces no struggles at all. Usually the villain occupies the antagonist role in a story so he is presented as powerful and usually in control of some large organization. The heroic protagonist's struggle is in large part due to the evil antagonist being so powerful while he has little or no power at all, except what he can muster up from personal courage and inspiring others. But if you reverse the situation, you can have the villain as an underdog attempting to bring about an evil plot, but is continuously set back by the efforts of do-gooders and meddling moral authorities who stand in his way. Underdog stories have an inherent appeal to them. People like seeing the smaller, weaker party triumph against the larger one who seems inevitable to succeed. David and Goliath being a primordial example of it, but there are endless others. Make the villain an underdog. Make his evil plan very unlikely to succeed. Make him suffer setbacks, have him seemingly lose everything once or twice, only to miraculously find a way forward. All the usual storybeats that typically accompany an underdog hero. Except his plan is to nuke the earth or whatever.
>>24850582>>24850593I won't read a book with an evil protagonist. Throughout all of history, protagonists tend to be good people for a reason.Enjoy your twisted fantasy where you get to vent your sociopathic urges vicariously, I guess, but I hate that shit and most of society does as well. WILL NOT READ!
>>24850654nta but have you read Les Mis? Javert is a compelling villain who you could argue is the protagonist of sorts.
