Starmer did not break rules when using Labour donor's penthouse to film COVID 'stay at home' broadcast, No 10 says>https://news.sky.com/story/starmer-did-not-break-rules-when-using-labour-donors-penthouse-to-film-covid-stay-at-home-broadcast-no-10-says-13222253Lord Waheed Alli: Who is the Labour peer behind Sir Keir Starmer's donation row?>https://news.sky.com/story/lord-waheed-alli-who-is-the-labour-peer-behind-sir-keir-starmers-donation-row-13221243Tory peer Baroness Sayeeda Warsi resigns whip after claiming party's 'move to far right' ahead of investigation into her language>https://news.sky.com/story/tory-peer-baroness-sayeeda-warsi-resigns-whip-after-claiming-partys-move-to-far-right-ahead-of-investigation-into-her-language-13222553Elon Musk lashes out at UK after hearing he isn't invited to tech conference>https://news.sky.com/story/elon-musk-lashes-out-at-uk-after-hearing-he-isnt-invited-to-tech-conference-13222451
>>482932389SEETHING AT JANNIES BANNING ME FROM POSTING IMAGES*apu apustaja angry with a red filter.jpeg
I only read posts accompanied by an image
>>482932389>https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/tears-police-probing-manchester-grooming-29994678>It identified up to 97 suspected offenders and at least 57 potential victims. But a review commissioned by Greater Manchester Mayor, Andy Burnham, in 2017 discovered it was discontinued in July 2005 due to resources.another paki rape gang, dont suppose anyone will ever do anything about this
Hygiene? That's antisemitism.
New Betelgeuse looks shite
CAN WE ALWAY HAVE THIS OK .. THANKS AND SO MUCH RESPECT BREAD MAKER ..
>cold winter day>week off from work>drive to a small town with your dog>park your car in a safe spot>catch a bus out to the countryside>walk through the hills and forests>nobody around>late afternoon>starts snowing>gets heavier and heavier>can't ignore it any more>finally turn back just in case there's no bus to take you back into town>snow is heavier than you've ever seen it>can barely see beyond a couple of feet ahead>come across a pillbox>step in for a second>make the decision to wait out the night there rather than risk getting lost>use the end of a pine tree branch to hastily sweep the floor>your dog is close at your side poking his nose forward as you sweep>gather some branches from outside and make a pile of them inside>snow is proper settling now and it's freezing cold>wind is picking up and stinging your exposed skin>put on all your spare layers and gloves etc>still chilly>get a fire going with your cigarette lighter>make sure it's controlled and won't spread>stick two sharp sticks into the ground immediately outside the pillbox entrance>jam a bunch of other straight sticks into the gap between those sticks and the brick doorway to make something of a windstop>drape your poncho over it to plug the gaps a bit>get all your food out of your rucksack>open the dog food and let your dog eat it>warm up your tinned beans and sausages, pour out some coffee from your thermos, and open a pack of walnuts>take out the mini white baguette you bought from a small Tesco (which you were surprised to find in so small a town, but there we go) for reduced price (after squeezing it to make sure it wasn't too hard and stale, and being pleasantly surprised and even a little cheeky finding how fresh it felt)>use your thumb and forefinger to pick at the fluffy core of the baguette and eat it so that it's just the outer shell left>pour the beans and sausages into it>gradually eat away and feel it warming your stomach>take a big sip of coffee
>>482932389Kier's fucked. They found out that real reason his son was in Lord Alli's penthouse is that Kier was renting out his son's bum.
women stink
>>482932539LISTEN NOT HAPPENING HERE DO WTF OK MODS ON SIDE .. BASED ..START A RIOT BURN DOWN ALSORTS GON HEARTBEAT .. NO FEDS UK MI% NO ARCHIVE .. WHEN SAY ...BUT LISTEN IM A FED K DONT DO THIS OK STOP AND THINK .. K DONBT SAY SHIT YOU DOIN OK THAT CAN GET YOU LIFE IN JAIL OOOPS I DONE and GOT ME .. worse A LIFE TIME SECTION ORDER ..
THIS ...
>>482932855checked. it's perfume.
KEEEK
>>482932843It's more bachi bachi then that, both him and the son take it up the bum by Alli.
bit nippy getting into bed this evening ladssoon be blanket time
bulgaria tier gdp in most of britain
>>482932735>use your thumb and forefinger to pick at the fluffy core of the baguette and eat it so that it's just the outer shell left>pour the beans and sausages into it>gradually eat away and feel it warming your stomachcorr
The Jews are making me sleepy. but it's only 10pm
>>482933440>fluffy duvet setPure sex.
> NEW: Tory leadership contender James Cleverly says that Covid lockdowns turned Boris Johnson into Oliver Cromwell>"I mean Boris Johnson and Oliver Cromwell, the two national leaders who in our history cancelled Christmas"[Boris Johnson if he was Oliver Cromwell]"Hello! I am here in, uh, Thimbleside-upon-Thames with my good friend Glory-And-The-Grace-Of-God Breakbones to speak with all the good people here about, uh, Getting Regicide Done, and how we can build a Godlier Britain"
>no goblin >no bogdan huh. weird eh. that they're both not around, at the same time.
>>482933386Oopsie! Teehee didn't mean it!
>>482933909>>482933340
>>482933945oh my bad.
>>482933909You're a paedophile.
>>482934006did i summons the goblin
>>482933440Heating not going on till Feb. Fuck women saying they are cold all the time
>>482934030You're a paedophile.
>>482934088think you already mentioned that gobbo. im not but you do you goblin weirdo
>>482933386nice
>>482934067Well yes that is the best way to stop them being cold, correct.
>>482934120Paedophile.
gobbo mad
>>482932389>Elon Musk lashes out at UK after hearing he isn't invited to tech conferenceAs a Tesla owner, he's going to use this as further reason not to give us updates. Fucksake.
>chuck a couple of pieces of sausage and bean-soaked bread to your dog>pick at the packet of walnuts>open your bag of sour gummy sweets>feel nice and full>gets dark outside>dog is lying flat on the ground with its head on its paws towards the fire>add some sticks to the flickering fire>it's still chilly on account of the season and the wind blowing in through the narrow windows>grab your poncho from the small stick palisade to put over you to retain your heat a little and guard against the wind>look outside as you grab the poncho>snow is a few inches thick and still falling steadily>go back and empty your rucksack>take stock of what you have there>decide to use your rucksack as a makeshift pillow>change your socks and put the slightly damp pair on a stone to dry near the fire
He's a paedophile.
ITV News just now on covid>Nurses wore adult nappies as they were so busy they couldn't take toilet breaks
>>482934265but they had time for tiktok videos? hmm
>>482933440Get electric blankie .. fren .. my katties loves i ..put under duvet .. an then Beds toasty ..Only ten mins ..?? ONLY TEN MINS CENT/HEAT ... WOW .. !!! WHY NOT US .. ???TWO HOT HOT WATBoTLLEs .. in a bed ..Toasty you only feel cold GET UP TO PAY FOR TOR/... LABOUR TAXES ......NO PENSION TIL 71... LABOUR .. HAHAHAHA FREE BUS PASSES OFF ELDERLY ..SO QUIETLY DIE ALONE AN MARY local shop doesnt know.. as LABOUR STEALS DED GRANNIES HOUSE ...FACT As A TAX ...WHY BE WONDERFUL ANWORKED HARD ALL ALL LIFES BUILT A FOUNTAION AS LABOUR SAID .. WELL DONE .. ...YOU ... STEALS FOR /GLOBO/HOMO AND UKIE WARS /which they lost .. already ..!
>>482934265Fucking hot
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2024/09/26/civilians-must-be-ready-to-fight-as-army-so-small-say-lords/>Civilians must be ready to fight because Britain’s military is so small, warn peers>Damning report says evidence suggests size of Army is inadequate and urges country to think of itself as ‘a nation under genuine threat’Genuine threat? From BAMES? Or an illegitimate occupation government that is still keeping innocent shitposters on indefinite remand while releasing serial kilelrs?>Danielle Sheridan>Defence Editorwould bang but it's rather embarrassing that the premier "centre right" paper has a wahmen as their defence editor
>>482933386>raises crime rateI NEED ALL NEETS, DISABLED AND RETARDED TO REPORT TO WORK ON THE DOUBLE, THERE WILL BE NO SHIRKERS. GLORY TO SOSIG.
Sometimes I go onto /gif/ and reply to all the posts asking for a source with "Mein Kampf - Adolf Hitler".
>>482934200 >give us updates. Fucksake.YOU NOT BOUGHT ONE ..?ITS A MEME .. hahahhahaha
Retvrn>inb4 but dey wuz fagsFuck off
>>482934468I'm going to beat you up.
>>482934303Weird ain't it? Hospitals were a battlefield, nurses so busy they couldn't use the toilet, but also had time to do tiktok videos in largely empty hospitals.
>>482934398How out of touch do you need to be, to suggest such a thing. The working class could not give a fuck about a government treating them like shit for decades, being replaced with a different one from another country.
>>482934398>Civilians must be ready to fightlmao, fucking deluded..... no cunt is stupid enough to fight for this shithole anymore
gobbo bogdan are the same people
>>482934468It's a great car, go to a showroom they'll let anyone test drive one.
dunno man, I would think this would make its way into everyday conversation quite quickly if this happened to me
>>482934567They just had a diaper fetish.. very hot if you ask me.
>>482934265mad times
>>482934653>It's a great car,lol.>driver trapped inside burns to death >door handles don't pop out, can't get in the car>rear light clusters swimming in water kek
>>482934653
>>482934686probably all i would go on about tb h
>>482934600ESL moment.
>>482934265AND NEVER EVER HAPPENED ..NHS LET 1MILLION ELDERLY DIE in .. DNRs..Many blokes I know after these Foreign cunts who killed so many and said bring moar , in the Northeast ..
>>482934702>can't touch this baby that was inside you five minutes ago because you might give it a coldTotal covidian genocide when?
>>482934779gobbodan boguslav.
>>482934591>>Civilians must be ready to fightbecause the UK doesn't know how to train soildiers anymore.
>>482934702Evil.
>>482934755it was the green UFO what done it
>>482934840Paedophile aedophIle
>>482934587They've been shilling this for almost a year, and now Israel is about to half heartedly go into Lebanon and get their arses handed to them (again). For me it was the retard who suggested those who volunteer might get say 10% off their student debt (so way worse than the American GI Bill).>>482934591Operation Downfall but we btfo the invaders not via bushido imperial death cults but because all the roads are too shit for any sort of advance.
For fucks sake ITV is on one tonight, now it's on about windrush. They just interviewed some wog who said in her speech>I lost me benefits
>>482934958alriiii laaaaa
>>482934742BASED AN RESPECT .. >>482934755ALL DED .. FIRES CANNOT BE OUT WATER /FOAM .. ?? WANKERS SAY THEY GREAT ..FECK OFF ..
>>482934686X to doubt. Any accusation that takes longer than 2 weeks to be levelled is bullshit
Just found a new picture of Bogdan straight from his LinkedIn, congrats on the job at Durgasoft bud.
>turns out the guy who sold the pagers to hezbollah was a Jeetkek wtf is this timelineJeet Jew alliance
>>482933386>Freedom for me>They said I hadn't done anything, so I could go free, and live on an island somewhere
>>482935028Acepto tu concesion.
Are you guys watching Sir Keir at the UN? He's speaking now, live on Sky News
is woollad in?
>>482935128>Jeet Jew allianceDid you not know about this? Fairly common knowledge
>>482935202bogoslav gobbodan laaa
>>482935159Lol no
>>482934755>>482934742>>482934755Give me one british example of this happening
>>482934989As if you can tolerate watching ITV in '24, fuck is wrong with you?
>>482935228I thought it was more like>phool sapport sarr>ew get away from me
Corrrrrr what a comfy morning this morningHad a blissful 10hr sleepWoke up, took me multivits and me creatine gummy bearsGot dressed, had a wash n brushed me teethWent co-op, got a coffee, got some banananananas, pork pies, loaf of seeded batch bread, bin bags, kitchen roll, radix bubble baff, a croissant, meal deal, baby wipesBumped into r paddy the barberWent greggs, got sosij rollio x2Went pound bakery, got 2 sosij 2 bacon 1 egg 2 cheese on toastWent savers, got face mask n bath soakWent barnardos, got some big scented candlesHope you all have a comfy day today lads
>>482935159Is he telling them as a toolmaker's son they should bow down to his forensic acumen?
>>482935082You still seething because I make thrice your salary as a toilet cleaner? Lmao
>>482935275>elon mad toy car
>>482935286Goldeneye's on in a bit.
>>482934755>Damn, he ain't going to be in Rush Hour 3
>>482935303it's night time now you robotic prick
>>482935305I only just tuned in, it's entirely possible he mentioned his toolmaker father several times before I started watching
>>482934807>Total covidian genocidewhat did the people of Coventry ever to do you?
>>482935340So easy to bring you out, and into the filter you go.
>>482935128> Jeet Jew alliancewrong again bong…its Jews puppet master and jeet marionette…Jews have no allies or that would need to consider someone your equal
OMFG ITS FUCKING RAINING... Anyone else getting sick of these idiots freaking out over the weather?
>I make thrice your salary as a toilet cleanerWogdan admitted to being a toilet cleaner. lmfao
evening ladswhat a comfy day I've had todaywent wazza this morninggot some new primark clobbersome comfy joggersgot a nice poundbakery on the waywas goin coalburners for a cup of tea likebut not goin wazza without payin a visit to primarkhad a good chat, had some rasolsshe's gonna give me some latvian recipes at some pointcan't wait to try them out likecame home, went B&Mgot some lovely candlesgot a new charger cos me old one brokegot a new USB charger too for maximum conveniencegot some marshmallow bath soak n allnot had any in agesfuming tho, wanted this LED corner light they have on the websitebut they've none in store ffsgonna see if I can order one online, or get the shop to get one in for meme neighbour was in when I got back, so I knocked onpulled him up on me doormatwas polite tho, just said"do you know anythin about me doormat disappearin lad?""it was there the last day you were then disappeared the same night you went away for a day"*deer in headlights.jpg*kek, bet he thought I wasn't aware of the goings on in the buildingI'm the all seeing eyeI'm gonna take that as a confirmation thonot gonna do anythin about it tho,its only a doormatgetting angry with me facial hair nglsaid I was growing a mustache didn't II'm about 4 days in now, and its bugging me, feel scruffyhate hair man, ffsgonna run a baffand maybe have a hydration mask on nowdefo have some avocadogonna be a comfy night
>>482935442Let us know when the Russian delegates ask why he impregnated his mistress Jenny Chapman and forced her to get an abortion
>bogoslav appears>j nigger appearslol.
>>482935514no, i want them to continue seething inside
>>482935275Ok
>>482935128Pajeets are subhuman. We hate them.
>>482935540make a vocaroo about it
>>482935617>LondonI said British
I was watching Bake Off earlier this evening. I got all excited when I saw my darling goddess, Alison Hammond. I am racist but I'd love a piece of that big slice of chocolate cake before I'm dead.
nah, early morning / late night threads between 12am and 9am tend to be comfy and its just a few good lads and myself chatting usually. its after 9am when brit/pol/ turns into a seethefest and I'm mostly not even here through the day because I'm a night owl but mongs accuse each other of being me because they think its funny so I get the blameI used to be here a lot more during lockdown for obvious reasons and I'd wind up the brincels because they'd target me. only I learned how to wind them up more than they could me and they've never forgiven me, so have just sperged about me consistently for years even when I'm not hereI'm chill asf now. don't drink anymore, no more caffeine either, I just chat about ideas and the logistics of stuff with a bit of frog posting. anyone saying I derail brit/pol/ is still in lockdown
>>482935576Done you up a kipper.
>>482935514I love the rain, was fuming earlier thought it was starting to thunder, but it was just some fucking wagie putting their bin back in
night lads
nobody finds it odd the slavshit and the j-nigger appear at the exact same time.. after both not being around.
nah I'm on about meI was a triptwat years backpeter hitchensused to debate loads. stopped because eddie didn't like me stealing his limelight and would ruin threads when I was getting attention he thought should be his. and the brinnies would follow suitso I became josh from brit/pol/ or gobbo instead kek
just woke uphow's seethe?
>>482934265Bullshit.
>>482935748ESL moment
>>482935303Corrrrrr what a comfy afternoon this afternoon Had a blissful 9hr sleep Woke up, took me multivits and me omega-3 capsules Got dressed, had a wash n brushed me teeth Went Sainsbury's, got a coffee, got some apples, scotch eggs, loaf of wholemeal bread, bin bags, kitchen roll, radox shower gel, a bagel, meal deal, hand wipes Bumped into r Terry the postman Went Pret, got bacon roll x2 Went Greggs, got 2 pasties 1 chicken, 1 steak bake Went B&M, got face scrub n bath bombs Went Oxfam, got some big unscented candles Hope you all have a comfy evening today lads
>>482934958HEY .. SHUT THE FUCK UP LAD ..TOP 8yo BOY NONCE PHIL SCHOFIELD .. .. 7 million QUID NEEDS TO BE ON TV ..> AGENT ..so Phil the only work is is this after hue a,, >phil.. I will eat dog shit to be on bbc .. >>AGENT .. its a CH4/5 said NO .. NO NO NONCE HERE ..So ITS Ch4 ??PHIL will eat dog shit ...OK OK On a desert an .. no people an YOU CAN PITY PARTY, SAY YOU HE CAME ONTO U.. AT STAGE ,.. AT 8yo ..VERY SEXUAL:LY .. HE GROPED ME AS KID THEN > AGENT ..NO we told YOU IT In YOU MILLION to GET ON TV ..BUT YOU ARE A EVIL SCUMBAG
>>482935514It's pretty funny, feels like people have forgotten weather changes with the seasons and now think any change to the weather is thanks to glowballs warming.
>janny banned me for gobbo post???????
https://vocaroo.com/1it2J7yqkKs2
>>482935742G'night lad. Sleep well.
>>482935727I also love the rain but the wind triggers me, so i stay inside to play
the constitution isn't arbitrary, its designed to be in line with natural law. you can only impose things that are not in line with natural law. e.g. laws that ban smoking. thats an imposition. natural law dictates everyone has the freedom to take whatever substances into their body that they want to regardless of the effect on them because they own their body. and to make the claim that you have the right to deny them that freedom is an imposition of an immoral condition upon someone, and to make the claim that in fact, you own their bodylaws govern everythingthere isn't a single aspect of reality that isn't governed by a set of immutable laws and principles. that includes human behaviourand we evolved to the point of having the ability to understand the laws that govern human behaviour via the neo cortex which is the part of the brain that deals with higher brain functionmorality is simply the laws that dictate human behaviour, in relation to the understanding of patterns within nature, of which we learn what to avoid and what to embrace, in an effort to achieve equilibrium between ourselves and our environment, so that we can achieve a state of balance and harmony that allows us to have the best chance at survival through good health and wellbeing
>>482934265>>482934789Explain what the fuck happened back then. I had a family member die from "covid induced pneumonia". After a couple of days in hospital he was looking a lot better, but then all of a sudden needed oxygen and then fucking died. The nurses kept mentioning some treatment they were giving him. I wish I wrote it down. Obviously, I was too upset at the time.
>>482935973Corrrrrr what a comfy afternoon this afternoonHad a blissful 9hr sleepWoke up, took me multivits and me omega-3 capsulesGot dressed, had a wash n brushed me teethWent Sainsbury's, got a coffee, got some apples, scotch eggs, loaf of wholemeal bread, bin bags, kitchen roll, radox shower gel, a bagel, meal deal, hand wipesBumped into r Terry the postmanWent Pret, got bacon roll x2Went Greggs, got 2 pasties 1 chicken, 1 steak bakeWent B&M, got face scrub n bath bombsWent Oxfam, got some big unscented candlesHope you all have a comfy evening today lads
>>482935834ooh rare flag, hold still
>>482935938ok josh
>>482935303Corrrrrr what a rough morning this morning Had a miserable 5hr sleep Woke up, barely managed me multivits and me creatine tablets Got dressed, forced meself to have a wash n brush me teeth Went Lidl, grabbed a coffee, got some oranges, sausage rolls, cheap white bread, bin bags, kitchen roll, no-name bubble bath, a stale muffin, meal deal, tissues Bumped into r Dave the neighbour, awkward chat Went Costa, got cold toastie x2 Went Greggs, they were out of everything decent, settled for a bland sausage roll Went Poundland, got a cheap face mask n bath salts Went Age UK, picked up some dusty candles that barely smell Hope you all survive the day lads
>>482935619
>>482935540Use the PUbbES an can I add ..which is very funny . ITS BORING DOGSHYTE AN RIGHTLY SO ..
Oh Warsi has resigned the tory whip, lmao, one of Dodgy Dave's star niggers
the constitution has no power in itselfit merely enshrines natural law and refers to it, so people have a point of reference to which they themselves can understand ityou can't "break" the constitution. because its just a document outlining natural lawyou can however, misrepresent it, or disencourage people from learning about it which is exactly what has been happening for centuriesbut that doesn't mean the constitution itselt is broken, people have just departed from the truth of it becasue of subversionand when that happens, they become immoral because they lose sight of morality>imposing the will of the constitutionthe constitution has no will, and there is no imposition, you're either in line with morality, or you're not. and if you're in line with morality, there is no imposition. because imposition is immoral as its a violation of the right to freedom
>>482934138Not the bakis though :D :D
Corrrrrr what a dreadful afternoon this afternoon Had a broken 4hr sleep Woke up, barely bothered with me multivits and me fish oil pills Got dressed, half-hearted wash n brushed me teeth Went Tesco, grabbed a lukewarm coffee, got some pears, stale pork pies, basic white loaf, bin bags, cheap toilet roll, bargain-brand bath foam, a dry croissant, meal deal, old wet wipes Bumped into r Karen from next door, made it worse Went Starbucks, overpriced burnt panini x2 Went Pound Bakery, nothing left, ended up with sad pasties Went Wilko, got a half-used face mask n cheap bath soap Went British Heart Foundation, picked up some fading candles that don’t even smell Hope you all get through today somehow lads
>>482936104>>482936140>>482936145>>482936164Corrrrrr what a rough morning this morningHad a miserable 5hr sleepWoke up, barely managed me multivits and me creatine tabletsGot dressed, forced meself to have a wash n brush me teethWent Lidl, grabbed a coffee, got some oranges, sausage rolls, cheap white bread, bin bags, kitchen roll, no-name bubble bath, a stale muffin, meal deal, tissuesBumped into r Dave the neighbour, awkward chatWent Costa, got cold toastie x2Went Greggs, they were out of everything decent, settled for a bland sausage rollWent Poundland, got a cheap face mask n bath saltsWent Age UK, picked up some dusty candles that barely smellHope you all survive the day lads
Corrrrrr what a fresh morning this morning Had a decent 8hr sleep Woke up, feeling good after me multivits and me vitamin D gummies Got dressed, had a proper wash n brushed me teeth Went Aldi, grabbed a smooth coffee, got some blueberries, fresh sausage rolls, seeded wholegrain loaf, bin bags, extra soft kitchen roll, luxury bubble bath, a warm croissant, meal deal, refreshing wipes Bumped into r Steve the builder, good chat Went Pret, got bacon roll x2, nice n hot Went Greggs, they had everything, grabbed a couple steak bakes Went Boots, got a fancy face mask n bath oil Went Scope, picked up some gorgeous scented candles Hope you all have a cracking day today lads
Not sure why pillbox posting hasn't taken off a bit more. They're a very brit/pol/-esque symbol of British history and character.
>>482935700AS THE ORIGINOL GANGSTA HERE..YOU DIDNT ASK .. MODS AGREED ..Showing ..Who cares .. here .. ??
joshbot's gone mental
>>482934242that pisses in bottles
>>482936393colourpill me on pillboxmaxxing
Not a fan of gobbo posting, very uncosy
Work from home tomorrow. Making my way through Star Trek Voyager
>>482936503want a pager la?
>>482936570worst of the old franchise. before discovery proved it could be even gayer
>>482936570you're a parasite la
brinnies seething even when I'm not here
>>482936503Corrrrrr what an *eventful* morning this morning Had a chaotic 6hr sleep 'cos me phone wouldn’t stop buzzing Woke up, spilled me multivits everywhere but still managed me energy gummies Got dressed in a hurry, had a quick wash n brushed me teeth Rushed to Asda, grabbed a coffee but dropped it on the floor, got some strawberries, nearly knocked over the pork pies stand, grabbed a multiseed loaf, bin bags, kitchen roll, fancy bath bombs, a buttery croissant, meal deal, disinfectant wipes Bumped into r Sharon, who told me all about her family drama, absolute chaos Went Costa, they messed up me order, so ended up with two extra bacon rolls Went Greggs, just as I got there, fire alarm went off, but I still grabbed a sausage roll in the panic Went Home Bargains, got the last luxury face mask and bath soak, nearly had a row with someone over it Went Sue Ryder, scored some massive scented candles on sale, feeling victorious Hope you all survive the madness today lads
>>482936286Nice flaghttps://vocaroo.com/199dPRAb5jmk
>>482936570You're costing the GDP £6 trillion per day you pretend to do work!
>>482936570>Work from home tomorrowI'm considering this route, i can't work around normies, but I can converse with them online.
>>482932645lol At least one person found this funny, anon
Corrrrrr what a fresh morning this morning Had a decent 8hr sleep Woke up, feeling good after me multivits and me vitamin D gummies Got awoken, had a proper walk n brushed me teeth Went Aldi, grabbed a smooth coffee, got some blueberries, fresh sausage rolls, seeded wholegrain loaf, bin bags, extra soft kitchen roll, luxury keyboard, a warm croissant, meal deal, refreshing wipes Bumped into r Dago the sicilian, good chat Went Pret, got bacon roll x2, nice n hot Went Greggs, they had everything, grabbed a couple steak bakes Went Boots, got a fancy flux capacitorWent Scope, picked up some gorgeous scented candles Hope you all have a cracking day today lads
Alrii laa just done a poo.Might play some poe n buy some scran. I accept all your concessions. I've done you. Met this well for bird laa gonna post you all me texts n vns later. It's gonna work out this time
I've been fasting today. First time trying it. The goal is a full day, so no eating from Thursday dinner to Saturday breakfast. I think I finished eating at around 11 PM last night, so it’s been about 22 hours so far. I usually have breakfast at 7, so I guess the target is 30 hours? Honestly, it hasn’t been too bad. A bit sluggish/weak here and there, but nothing serious. Weirdly enough, I've only felt low energy when sitting down. When I’m up and moving around, I feel just fine. Along with plain water, I’ve had 3 black coffees and 1 green tea. Supposedly it ramps up that autophagy thing that all the health experts rave about—supposed to help with longevity, fend off cancer, dementia, etc. Maybe I’ll make this a regular thing. Like for 2025, I’ll aim to do it once a month. And if that works, maybe in 2026 I’ll try 2-day fasts every other month. 2027 could be 3-day fasts every quarter? I’m probably getting ahead of myself, though—still gotta make it through this one first ha ha. Can't wait for breakfast, desu.
>>482936847>>482936948ive been fasting today. first time ever.aim has been a whole day, so no eating from wednesday dinner to friday breakkie.i probably finished eating at nearly midnight yesterday. so it's been 23 hours so far. i usually have breakkie at about 8 so i guess the aim is 32 hours?not been too bad. a bit low energy/weak but nothing major. in fact ive only felt low energy at rest. when moving and working i felt absolutely fine.along with plain water ive had 2 black coffees and 2 green teas.supposed to ramp up that autophagy thing all the youtubers say is good for health, staving off cancer and dementia etc.maybe i'll do this once a month or something.yeah, say for 2025 i'll do it once a month.and if that works out, then for 2026 i'll change it to 2 day fasts, but only once every 2 months.2027 3 day fasts every 3 months? probably getting way ahead of myself, i still havent got through this one yet ha ha. cant wait til breakky though desu.
corrr what a comfy morning this morningwent stables, got me horseme lass got me into me suit of armour (temu)polished my sword skillscrossed the river mersey with me steedled me army of wools to victory against the scouse, at royal albert dockswent wazza, got some steak for me victory feasthad me victory feast after kekhope you all have a cracking day today lads
>>482936618Got through tng and ds9 again over the last few years, find Voyager to be a nice lighter watch. Visually it's aged extremely well, shame all the design language was ditched. I've seen enterprise but woudlnt sit and watch every episode, it's mostly fucking boring. Never watched discovery, got 6 eps into Picard and gave up, never watched any of the other new trek.
chat this is a goodbye video
ime was one of the major powers of the northeast under the Scouse dynasty>However, in 1266, conflict between the Scouse dynasty and the Angevins led to the kingdom's conquest by Wool I, Duke of Birkenhead, who proceded to woolify the place>This was highly unpopular amongst the peasants of Merseyside, who revolted and made the Beatles to be their new rulers, starting the war of the Scouse vespers between Scouse dynasty and the house of Wool>The resulting peace divided the old kingdom in two, with the lamd in eastern Merseyside remaining under Wool control, alongside with the official title of Kingdom of Merseyside (Although it would be retroactively be known as the "Kingdom of Wools")>Meanwhile the Scousers got the western lamds of Liverpool, but since they couldn't crown themselves as kings of Merseyside (since Wools still kept the name rights), they named it the "Kingdom of Mersey beyond the Lighthouse" >Later on, the Beatles unified both halves of the old kingdom of Merseyside, but still kept both titles separate since it meant more titles to stuff in their name, but simplified by just calling both titles as Kingdom of Merseyside, yet despite now being in personal union, they remained administratively separate.>In the next centuries, the Spanish, the Austrian Habsburgs and the Bourbouns took control over the kingdoms and maintained the same arrangement as the Beatles>However, during the napoleonic wars, Napoleon conquered the lands of Liverpool, and reorganized it into a republic, later a kingdom ruled by one of his brothers, meanwhile, the king and the court to fled to Manchester where they resisted>After the defeat of Napoleon, the king returned, and redrew borders in europe, he decided to formally unite both halves, by dissolving the kingdom of Merseyside beyond the lighthouse
Corr just woke up laa how's the seethe. Gonna make some eggs and have a poo maybe. I've done you all. You think about me even when I'm not here. I havent been here all day this is the first time I'm posting laa . Am gonna marry this millionaire lass Corr. I never met her but she's well into me yano . Laa. Must be cos I'm classically handsome and she's impressed with me skills putting up shelves n that
>>482935940CAN PUBBES DOG SHYTES #WE DONE .. CARE As ALL WERE FAKE IPS .. Brill mods ...AS... I told You years ago...brilliant, an you predicted ,I mad but back then ..BRAVO WELL DONE .. !.. HOWS YOUR LIFE .. Seriously an You still haunt here .. WANNABIE FAGGOTS ...NAMEFAGS WORSE than you FELLA .. U . KNOW THAy .. 6 WANNABIIEs SET OFF .. if not trained .. Jesus SERIOUSLY I KNOW ALLLLLL ABOUT .. IM sAYIN BUT WE ST SHIT /START AGAIN .. NEW ENEMY IS LABOUR .. OK TAKE CARE SORRY ABOUT YER LOSES Its tragic .. I am LAUDED AN BELOVED BY 5 million now .. you .. hmm ..
>>482936618Watched one ep of Voyager after binging a couple series of TNG. Didn't go much on Voyager tbqh.
>>482935527ESL moment
One of the twats at work was blasting negro tunes out his tinny phone speaker, walk past, smell somethingold spiceffs
>>482937603at least it wasn't BRUT
I miss himhttps://vocaroo.com/12Hz35FCc8V1
>>482934702WTF am i looking at?
>>482933440Evening spent in front of the fire with poorly cat. Comfy. If anyone has any suggestions for helping a cat with putting on weight, without too much protein, I’m all ears.
>>482937334Hey there! Your message definitely stands out! Life’s been interesting, thanks for asking. It seems like you’ve got a lot on your mind. I appreciate your concern, but let’s keep the conversation focused. Wishing you all the best with whatever you’re working on!
>>482937743alri la feed your cat more food thatll do
>>482937527You should brush up on your sentence construction then shouldn't you?
>>482937839Momento ESL
Literally what is wrong with new builds like this Convinced you lot just love moaning
Alriii laaaaJust had an ESL moment while I were having a vishpoo in me Bogdan laa. Damn russians. Seethe seethe
>>482938030No fences.
Been eating a lot of blood sausage lately, my shits are vishpoo-tier black.
>>482938030I'm not dropping 300k on a rendered image nigger
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BUB__7ciPHYWhat a Bizarre video>Only practising homosexuals are likely to know what all these means>X means... Y means....
This isn't how I remember it
I played War Thunder for the first time today, what a shit game, promptly uninstalled.
>>482938030Sand to cement ratio for one
>>482938511now that's a meme I've not seen in a long time.
>>482937717So much better than josh
>>482937784Brilliant Its just enlarge prostate .. 6 doscs as a nutter .. me all doing diagnos .. if ..IF GP .. HE SAYS YEAH CUT BOLLOCKS AN ASHOL SHIT BAG ON YOUR .. THAT .. (*CHEAP METHOD* ) SORRY NO .. !!! BIT OF PILES CREM SORTS PROSTATE DOWN ..FANKS yeif you.. we appeared him you not / we have a code .. suttle ..
>>482937705Don't mind BRUT
>>482938794its over powering.
>>482938749Look, I’m not sure what's going on with you, but this isn’t making much sense. It seems like you’re dealing with some personal issues, and I really think you should speak to someone who can help you properly. Throwing out all this chaotic nonsense isn’t going to get us anywhere. If you actually want to have a conversation, we can talk like adults, but all this rambling isn't helping anyone. Maybe take a step back and think about what you really want to say, because this is not the way to go about it.
alriii laaa just woke up hows the seethe
> NEW: Chancellor Rachel Reeves plans to unlock up to £50 billion in the Budget to spend on roads, housing and energy by changing how government debt is measurednegative 22 to positive 50??
>>482938964ESL moment
>>482932389There is a suspicious looking nigger lurking in street opposite my house. What should I do?
>>482939067ESL moment
>>482935742Night
>>482939158ESL moment
ESL MOMENT
>>482932389Can someone explain to me why people think the Tories are "moving to the far right"?From what I can gather AT BEST you have absolutely milquetoast civic nationalist drivel coming form assorted BAMEs.
ESL moment
>>482939253ESL moment
>>482938964whatever, they should just focus on the energy if they had any intention of fixing our economy. Cheaper energy would mean cheaper running costs for manufacturing and cheaper energy bills means consumers have more money to spend. But NOOOO, we have a bunch of corrupt puppets in power for decades now.
>>482938894You tried Joop?
>>482939313had a mate that use to wear that, its alright smell, its just very girly smell.
>>482939344Fuck off vishpoo
>>482938964Is any of that money going to come from not spending billions of foreigners here and abroad?
NHS SCUM CUNSULTANTS SHITS .. ASK SECOND OPIONIONS ..NEVER GET CASTRATED .. BY THEM .. MY ERECTIONS most mornings as Teen .. WOW ...HEMMOIREEND CREAM .. ENLARGE PROSTES ...I will get banned say REAL MED EVIDICE SOON .. dONT GET BALLS OFF /ASS OFF AN SHIT BAG FITTED OK ..UNDER NHS PILES CREAM .. HEMORRRIOD CREMA SAVED ME .....WOW ..
>>482939067Wait until his three mates turn up then they’ll all get in a car
>>482939497Once upon a time in the heart of the Amazon rainforest, there lived a tribe of people who communicated solely through the medium of interpretive dance. This tribe, known as the Wiggletons, had a unique way of resolving disputes: they would challenge each other to a series of elaborate dance-offs, judged by a panel of trees that they believed were ancient guardians of wisdom. The trees, with their vast knowledge, would sway to indicate the winner, making the Wiggletons feel deeply connected to nature.Every full moon, the Wiggletons would host a grand festival called the Wiggle-a-thon, where they would perform a dance so powerful it was said to cause the stars to rearrange themselves in the sky. On one occasion, a visiting traveler from a distant land witnessed the spectacle and claimed that he saw the constellations transform into images of famous historical figures, including Julius Caesar and Cleopatra, waltzing together.
>>482939570The Wiggletons also had a pet dragon named Fluffernutter, who they believed could grant wishes. Fluffernutter, a flamboyant creature with rainbow-colored scales, would often fly high above the trees to oversee the festival, occasionally swooping down to join in the dancing. Legend has it that anyone who could keep up with Fluffernutter's moves would receive a wish, but no one ever managed to out-dance the dragon.One year, the festival coincided with a solar eclipse, which the Wiggletons took as a sign that their dance had the power to influence the cosmos. They began a new tradition of inviting celebrities from around the world to attend, hoping to showcase their talents to famous personalities like Albert Einstein and Cleopatra, who, according to Wiggleton lore, were rumored to have been excellent dancers in their lifetimes.Eventually, the Wiggletons became so famous that they were featured in a blockbuster movie directed by Steven Spielberg, titled "The Wiggle Chronicles." However, the film was never released, as it was said to be lost in the Bermuda Triangle, never to be found again.
>>482939407It's one of my go to's. I want to get some Boss but it's fucking expensive. Remember my parents bought me a miniature selection of them one Christmas.
Night cunts
>>482939570That's DMT
>>482939634Buy some Tom Ford ffsTight cunts
>>482939693In the bustling city of Atlantis, where underwater skyscrapers sparkled like diamonds, a peculiar phenomenon occurred every Tuesday. The residents, known for their exceptional talent in singing, would gather in the Grand Coral Amphitheater to hold a contest where the best singers would be crowned the "Siren of the Week." The prize? A magical conch shell that could summon sea turtles to perform synchronized swimming routines.One day, a fish named Finnegan decided he wanted to enter the contest despite being tone-deaf. Undeterred by his lack of vocal talent, he crafted an elaborate costume made of seaweed and shells, convinced that his performance would captivate the audience's imagination. When the day of the contest arrived, Finnegan flopped onto the stage, flailing his fins and attempting to "sing" while making exaggerated facial expressions.To everyone's surprise, the judges, who were all giant squids with a penchant for the absurd, awarded Finnegan the highest score for "Most Creative Performance." The crowd erupted into cheers, convinced that Finnegan had redefined what it meant to entertain. In celebration, the squids created a new category: "Performance Art," solely for Finnegan.News of Finnegan's unexpected victory spread across the ocean, leading to an influx of aspiring performers who wanted to replicate his success. Soon, the Grand Coral Amphitheater was filled with acts that included dancing jellyfish, stand-up comedy by clams, and interpretive swimming by octopuses. The contest quickly evolved into a weekly variety show, with each performance more bizarre than the last.
>>482939817The highlight of each show became the "Mystery Guest," a legendary creature that had never been seen by anyone in Atlantis. Rumors swirled about the identity of this guest, with some claiming it was a mermaid, while others insisted it was the long-lost King Triton himself. However, the reality was far stranger: the Mystery Guest was simply a particularly large and grumpy sea cucumber who despised being the center of attention but loved the free snacks provided by the amphitheater.Ultimately, the weekly contests transformed Atlantis into a hub of creativity and absurdity, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected paths lead to the greatest adventures.
>>482939707If only nukes were real
Gonna win the lottery tomorrow lads.
>Keir in US begging Biden to let us fire at Moscow from Ukraine
>>482939707this is only half of the original planned yield of that thing. They said they have 100MT warheads, do people have any idea how massive one of those things would be?
*#*THIS IS NOT A DRILL*#*it's time to start buying ubisoft stock IMMEDIATELY I M M E D I A T E L Y !Dips this low you ain't seen since the space age. Buy buy buy Ubisoft has ties with the French government. They won't be allowed to failI REPEAT:BUY UBISOFT STOCK IMMEDIATELY!
>>482939732Buy me some for Christmas mate.
>>482934702Some of this had to be experiments for the big book of psyop lessons.
>>482939961>t. Ivan Britishenko
>>482939997lel I bought some earlier today.
*#*THIS IS NOT A DRILL*#* It’s time to start investing in Ubisoft stock **NOW**! I M M E D I A T E L Y! The stock is at a historic low—prices we haven’t seen since the early days of gaming! This is a golden opportunity. Ubisoft has strong ties with the French government, and you can bet they won't be allowed to fail. They have too much at stake! The gaming industry is booming, and with upcoming titles on the horizon, this is the moment to act. I REPEAT: **BUY UBISOFT STOCK IMMEDIATELY!** Don’t miss out on this chance to secure your financial future. The potential for growth is enormous, and the risk of loss is minimal. This is the moment we’ve been waiting for—get in before it’s too late!
>>482939554I just talked Pubbe an he ..all namefags RUINED HIS LIVE .. and before the 1st election he turned up an said stop it .. Yoiu already got decist an cease an ... Lawsuit .. now .. ... Fact is he hates Labour/tory an .. will never post here ..an you losers here we got evidence now to law, Talked Real guy he hates you Ruined him here ..ANYWAY LONG STORY BLOKES VERY DECENT NOW, an just stop this HATE .. I Gooing in deep dive the archives an IP s .. an WE WILL not namefags .. but the 3 are ACTICE NONCES ...NOTTINGHAM.. LOl LISTEN .. COP will soon get you .. ok .. ..LAWSUITS ...on AN MOAR ..
>>482940232IMMEDIATELY!MMEDIATELY
>>482935128Jeets are the jews middlemen of choice.
>>482940409I just read the absolute best thread on the internet, and I can hardly contain my excitement! It was an incredible journey that made me laugh, think, and feel all at once. The way the contributors wove together facts, humor, and sharp insights about British politics was nothing short of genius. Each post felt like a delightful treasure, revealing perspectives I hadn't considered before.I was practically glued to my screen, hanging onto every word. The witty banter and clever comebacks had me in stitches! It’s amazing how a simple thread can spark such joy and engagement. The camaraderie among the users was palpable; you could sense the shared passion for the subject matter. It felt like a lively pub discussion, full of passionate opinions and lively debates, but in the best way possible.The depth of knowledge on display was awe-inspiring. I loved how they tackled complex issues with clarity and flair, making the often dry and convoluted world of politics feel accessible and exciting. The memes and references were spot on, adding a layer of fun that kept me coming back for more. I found myself nodding in agreement, chuckling at the inside jokes, and even pondering some of the more serious points raised.This thread reminded me of the power of community and shared interests. It’s threads like these that make the internet such a vibrant place. I genuinely feel inspired and energized after reading it. If you haven't checked it out yet, do yourself a favor and dive in—it's a must-read that will elevate your day!
>>482938030>detachedSIGN ME UP
Gonna do a poo before going to bed lads.
>>482939961Why are we even thinking about fighting Russia
>>482939997What's the easiest way to do it ?
>>482932602probably found that local synagogues were putting out bounties for underage girls, for their Chanukah/Rosh Hashanah/Sukhot parties.
>>482940568As the day winds down and I prepare to settle into the comforting embrace of my bed, I've come to the realization that it’s time for one final act of self-care before I drift off to sleep. Yes, you guessed it—I'm about to embark on a small but significant journey to the bathroom for a much-needed visit. It's funny how often we overlook the simple things in life, and yet this particular ritual is something I truly value. It’s that moment of solitude where I can reflect on the day’s events, perhaps consider all the highs and lows, and contemplate what tomorrow might bring. You might find it amusing, but there’s a certain tranquility that comes from knowing that I’m taking the time to prioritize my well-being.Now, I know this may sound trivial, but let’s be real: this is more than just a biological necessity. It’s a mini-ceremony of sorts, a little pause in the hustle and bustle of life. I can almost feel the weight of the day lifting off my shoulders as I step into the bathroom, closing the door behind me and leaving the world outside for a moment. I’ll gather my thoughts, perhaps even chuckle at the various mishaps of the day or remember a hilarious conversation I had with friends. This is my time to unwind and let go of the day’s stresses, allowing myself to focus on the moment at hand. After all, isn’t it the little things that often bring us the greatest joy? So, here’s to the simple act of doing a poo before bed! It’s not just a routine; it’s a necessary pause that prepares me for a restful night. I’ll emerge refreshed, ready to slip into my cozy sheets, knowing I’ve taken care of all aspects of my health, even the most mundane ones. Goodnight, lads, and may your evenings be just as fulfilling as this small yet satisfying ritual!
>>482935393Why are you watching films on tv? Do you like adverts?
>>482940701Was watching the snooker earlier and saw Goldeneye was on.
>>482935393As the day draws to a close and I prepare to embrace the comfort of my bed, I find myself faced with a rather urgent situation. Yes, it’s time for my final ritual of the evening—a trip to the bathroom for what I thought would be a quick relief. However, in a twist of fate, things didn't quite go as planned, and let me tell you, it’s turned into quite the ordeal!I thought I had enough time to make it to the toilet, but as I stood up and made my way there, I suddenly realized that the clock was not on my side. In a frantic dash, I felt a wave of urgency wash over me. It was like one of those scenes in a comedy where everything goes wrong at the worst possible moment. Despite my best efforts, it became clear that my timing was a bit off, and the inevitable happened—big whoopsie!In that split second, I experienced a mixture of disbelief and embarrassment. How did I let this happen? It’s one of those moments that you laugh about later but feel completely mortified by in the moment. I never thought I’d be the person who didn’t make it to the toilet in time, but here we are!Now, instead of enjoying a peaceful moment of reflection and relaxation before bed, I’m dealing with the fallout of this unfortunate incident. It’s definitely not how I imagined ending my day. I can’t help but chuckle at the absurdity of it all. Life has a funny way of throwing curveballs, and sometimes you just have to roll with the punches, even if they’re a bit messy!So, here I am, navigating this unexpected mishap. I’ll clean up and take it in stride because, at the end of the day, it’s just a reminder that we’re all human and we all have our moments. Goodnight, lads, and let this be a lesson to us all: always heed the call of nature, especially when it’s time for bed!
>>482934265More Hasbara by the fifth column journalists. Someone probably leaked a video about nurses openly displaying their fetish and they're hoping to set the narrative
>>482936096Euthanised. Wish I was joking or being a cunt.
>>482940585They are our mortal foes, apparently. They are tyrannical, they arrest and imprison the enemies of the regime.
listen dickheads hers o ANGRY an yey I payed scrabble with .. affiffrkkkiacs THIS < WAS WORLD /SORTED ALLLLOWEED ...white man beats black guy ..
going to a gig tomorra, used to have a mate whos favourite band it is, wonder if he'll be there, be nice if we bumped into each other then I'd have a fren again
>>482941616Flibberty flobberty floo, wHAt a wOnDERFUl day tO pLay with sQuIrRelS anD sKippY roOks! WHeRe is the jUmBLEd caRrot of pEacE? oH, lEt's rUn aRound the mOOnlit jAr of giggle bEans. YEssir, I sAw a hApPy dUckling sCreeCHING in the daffOdiL pAtch, bEckoning me tO dAnCe. SUch mAdnEss! I tRipped on a Twizzler and flew over the Pudding mOuNtains, mAking sParkly rainbows in thE sKy! Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, wHat a relIef! I see a sNOrty Snail wearing gLittery sHoes, prAncing with dElight. Can yoU hear the bOUnCy tOads crooK-ing hAppily? THey aRe trUlY the kings of the lUcky marshmallow fields! LoOk! There’s a fuzzy wOlf riding a cAT with polka dOts, saying "wHOOO’s ready for a sPAnKle dAnce party?" Bouncy bubble gum trees sTAND tall and wAve their brAnchEs like gOoFy armS! I gRABBED a bUZZing jUggler who was juggling cOcOnuts and asked him for a dAnce. “NO WAY!” he said, “I’m here tO juggle my waY to gLory!” What a prOdigious rePly! Hoo-wee! I tripped over a lOtus floWer, and IT sprouted aS a mAgic carpet! “Let’s zoom to the nEon faIr!” I shOuted, and the clouds exploded with laUghter! A sLy Giraffe with glUe on his nEck fEll right into a piT of jEll-O! EvErybody LAUGHED, sNORTED, and cHUCKLED like there was nO tomOrrOw! FaIries dAncEd on toP of sTuFFed mushrooms, sHimmering and sprEAding confetti wHile a bIg bEar coNtorted into a bLue pretzel! WhAt cRAzy tiMes we’Re having! Remember, fRiEnds, in this wOnderful gAlaxy of rAndomness, eVerything is a sPlendid exPeriment of hAppiness, wHich we mUst cElebrate! sO grab your whizzing wHizzleblobs and let’s go cReate some hAHA hAppEnings! FLAPDoodle!
>>482941802CorrrrWhat band?
>>482941436sad cunt .. an I will IP guy .. SAY STOP IT AS WE AFTER THEM I wouldnld dox him but ...BASED OK OK THANKS xxx didnt kill him
might transition from hobbit to dwarf
>>482940000Oud Wood>>48294035073p for ten club king size
>>482941872a death metal band called cannibal corpse, got nothing else better to do so gonna go on me tod, gets me out the house for a bit if nothing else
>>482942111Do African nations at the UN go on about being black?
>>482941945Wobbledee wibbledee wharf, where the flabbergasted flumpkins frolic under the glow of twinkling tangerine stars! I tripped over a dinglehopper while chasing a whizzing whirligig, and let me tell you, the ruckus was absolutely bonkers! Bouncing bunnies in top hats were doing the cha-cha while sipping fizzy lemonade from rainbow-colored cups. As I twirled about, I stumbled into a marshmallow cloud that whispered sweet nothings and showered me with sprinkles! Suddenly, a troupe of dancing pickles burst onto the scene, each wearing a shiny monocle, twirling their tiny canes with flair. They invited me to join their jig, promising a treasure chest filled with gummy worms if I could out-dance their best flippers. The air was thick with the scent of chocolate-covered dreams and cotton candy wishes, and who could resist such an offer? Just then, a fuzzy wuzzy bear with a glittery bowtie rode in on a unicycle, juggling kiwi fruit and reciting nonsensical poetry about the moon’s cheese cravings. “To the moon and back on a pancake stack!” he exclaimed, causing the crowd of giggling gophers to erupt in applause! I spun around, determined to impress with my own funky moves, but tripped over a sleepy sloth who was napping in the shade of a giant lollipop tree. With a plop and a splash, we landed in a puddle of rainbow jelly! The splendor of the moment brought all the critters together, and we laughed until our bellies hurt, surrounded by flying fish who sang ballads of whimsy. The jelly began to ripple and bubble, transforming into a slippery slide that sent us zooming into the great unknown.
>>482942064They're still going? Whack.
Ziggity zAggity zap, the FlimFlam fairies Fluttered in a Whirlwind of glittery Noodles, twirling beneath a Sky of tangerine marshMallows! I jUmPed into a puddle of Fizzy fluff and was Catapulted into a dAnce-off with a shimmery Fish who wore a Top hat and sang lullAbies about pickle pAInting! “Twirl and swirl,” it crooned, as the wHirligigs spun around like frEnzied tornadoes, throwing sprinkles in every Direction! A woNderful walrus slid down a Rainbow slide, flapping its Flippers and squeaking “Pip pip, cheerio!” while a flock of spaghetti Birds circled overhead, leaving trails of sAuce in their Wake! Suddenly, a giant Cupcake appeared, bouncing on fluffy marshMallow feet, inviting us all to a scrumptious Tea party with Whipped cream clouds and jellybean jUgglers. I slid into a Chair made of candy Canes, only to discover it was a Bouncy castle disguised as a chair, launching me into the Air where I somersaulted over a herd of giggling Gorillas wearing oversized Sunglasses! “Squee-eee!” I yelped, as a mischievous raccoon wearing a Bowtie played the Accordion, leading a parade of dancing Donuts that sparkled in the Sunlight like disco Balls! Every creature in this land of kooky Chaos sang in a chorus of happy Hoots and toots, filling the air with the Sweet sound of laughter, while a wise old Owl with glasses the Size of saucers declared, “Time for the great Flip-flop fiesta!” Confetti rained down from a Sky of waffle Cones as everyone launched into a grand Dance, swirling and twirling like the world’s goofiest Kaleidoscope! Just then, a rubber Chicken flew by, squawking riddles about Purple pickles and the Mysteries of the marshmallow Universe, and the crowd gasped in Delight, their Eyes twinkling with pure, unadulterated Joy! The day turned into a flurry of Fun, with fAbled friends, fuzzy Wuzzies, and a melOdy of mischievous Magic, reminding us that in this whirligig of Whimsy, life was simply
>>482942111checkedhe also called putin a slave owner kek
Unleash the bots
This thread is a joke. I'm going to sleep.
>>482942584You won't wake up.
>>482942584In the deEpest corners of my mind, where shadows drape like shrouds, I found myself in a crumbling mortuary, the air thick with the scent of decay and faint whispers of forgotten souls. I was there, the unhinged mortician, surrounded by the cackling laughter of desiccated mannequins that mocked my every move. They wore tattered funeral gowns, their faces painted in grotesque smiles, staring with hollow eyes that glinted like shattered glass. “Prepare the bodies!” I muttered under my breath, as the walls seemed to pulsate with a heartbeat of their own.I grabbed my rusty tools, the metal glistening ominously under flickering fluorescent lights that buzzed like angry hornets. A cacophony of voices filled the room, echoing my name, demanding attention from the depths of the cold steel tables. “Don’t forget the extra stitching!” one voice squeaked, while another hissed, “Make sure they look good for the guests!” A feeling of vertigo washed over me as I opened a cadaver drawer, revealing a collection of bodies wrapped in floral sheets, their expressions frozen in eternal horror. I chuckled nervously, imagining their last moments, as I meticulously arranged their limbs like a twisted puppet show. My fingers danced over the remnants of life, tracing scars and bruises, each telling a story I was no longer allowed to read.
>>482942584Rebel. Take back your thread.
>>482942584Suddenly, the lights flickered again, and I turned to see a figure in the corner—a decaying clown, its nose rotting and mouth twisted in a cruel grin. “Why so serious?” it wheezed, laughter bubbling up like putrid bile. I could feel my sanity slipping as I realized the floor was carpeted in writhing worms, pulsating with the rhythm of my frayed nerves. “Join us,” the clown beckoned, “in the grand performance of the macabre!” As the laughter crescendoed, the walls began to bleed a thick, dark liquid, painting the room in shades of dread. I was trapped in this nightmarish ballet, the puppeteer of the dead, crafting their final repose, while the spirits of the departed floated around me, whispering secrets I could never comprehend. “Don’t let them escape!” they chorused, their voices a haunting symphony of despair. In the distance, I heard the soft chime of a clock, its sound wrapping around me like a noose. “Time’s running out,” I thought, and I frantically worked to arrange their bodies, my hands shaking with a mix of dread and exhilaration. The mortuary was a circus of horrors, and I was the unhinged ringmaster, forever trapped in this ghastly dreamscape of my own creation, where every laugh echoed the madness that thrummed within me.
>>482942410mad innit, apparently so. Seen a few clips of the recent tours and they still sound pretty decent, ticket was only 30 quid as well so fuck it, its either that or I'm on Brit/pol/
tbf the bot still posts better prose than cauldron
Once upon a time in the sleepy town of Tiddleshire lived a lad known as Cauldron. Now, Cauldron wasn’t just any lad; he was a peculiar brew of daydreams and awkwardness, forever lost in the swirling thoughts that danced in his head like sugar in tea. One dreary Wednesday, he forced himself out of his cluttered sanctuary, venturing into the bustling local Sainsbury’s, a realm of fluorescent lights and mundane grocery carts.It was there he spotted her—a cashier named Jess, her smile bright enough to turn a cloudy day into sunshine. She had long hair and an infectious laugh, effortlessly charming the customers as they shuffled past. But as Cauldron approached, his usual whirlwind of thoughts twisted into a spiraling tornado of anxiety. What if he tripped over his words? What if she noticed the stain on his shirt? Overwhelmed, he chickened out, instead pretending to check his phone, all while stealing glances at her.When it was finally his turn at the till, he mumbled a request for chocolate bars, avoiding her gaze like it was a live grenade. As Jess scanned the items, Cauldron felt a strange combination of warmth and terror. Instead of saying something—anything—he retreated home, allowing his cowardice to bubble into a concoction of self-delusion. That night, he logged onto an online forum, crafting an elaborate tale of rejection. “You won’t believe what just happened!” he typed, spinning a narrative about how he bravely rejected her because of her “overly pointed elbows.” In this fabricated story, he was the hero, avoiding the perils of romance like a knight dodging arrows. But deep down, Cauldron knew he had missed an opportunity, retreating into a lie instead of facing the real world. Lying in bed, staring at his fantasy posters, he felt the weight of his unfulfilled potential. Maybe one day, he’d gather the courage to step out of his stories and into a life where pointed elbows were just amusing quirks, and connections were worth the r
So what do we do when Israel starts dropping nukes?
>>482942839Have fun lad.I'm seeing CKY in November.
In the sleepy town of Tiddleshire, life was plodding along as usual for Cauldron, the socially awkward lad with a penchant for daydreaming. On a dreary Wednesday, he sat in his cluttered bedroom, idly scrolling through his phone while the world outside seemed blissfully unaware of the impending doom. Little did he know, the headlines were exploding with the news that Russia had launched nuclear missiles, and World War III had begun. As he read the absurdity of it all—a war that could obliterate everything—he found himself in the familiar comfort of his imagination, daydreaming about how mundane life was. "What a bother," he thought, glancing out his window at the birds chirping as if nothing was happening. “All this fuss over some pointed elbows,” he mused, recalling his previous encounter with the cashier Jess, his last real human interaction. Outside, chaos was beginning to unfurl, sirens blaring in the distance, people running, panicking. But Cauldron felt oddly detached, as if he were watching a poorly made movie. "Surely, they’ll figure it out," he reasoned, turning back to his laptop. He imagined a scenario where he heroically saved the world—perhaps by turning off the missiles with a clever hack or persuading the leaders to sit down for tea.
>>482943813Hours passed in his cocoon of apathy, and the news reports grew increasingly grim. There were flashes on the screen—cities turning to ash, millions disappearing in an instant, a world falling apart while he remained locked in his bedroom, contemplating the irony of it all. "What a fascinating turn of events," he thought, marveling at how surreal it felt. He even chuckled at the absurdity of his own detachment, scribbling in his diary about “Cauldron’s Last Great Adventure.” But as night fell, the bright flash of a nuclear explosion lit up the sky outside his window, casting eerie shadows across his room. The ground shook, and Cauldron sat frozen, an unsettling realization creeping in. The daydreams faded, replaced by the crushing weight of reality. “Well, I suppose this is it,” he murmured, trying to wrap his mind around the finality of it all.In those last moments, he felt a pang of regret—not for the world ending, but for all the chances he hadn’t taken, the words left unsaid. He thought of Jess, of the laughter and life he could have shared if only he’d dared to step outside his fantasies. As the world crumbled around him, Cauldron’s bland adventure came to a grim end, a poignant reminder that life, however ordinary, could be swept away in an instant, leaving behind only silence where dreams once thrived.
>>482932735Gay story. It rarely gets cold enough in the UK that you couldn't comfortably spend a night If you were clothed appropriately. Obviously if it is cold slice the dog open and fashion a nice warm hat out of it and feast on its meat.
What are the chances WW3 kicks off in the next year, Lads?
>>482944111Im sure the lens of history will judge that it has already begun.
>>482943342Have a nice cup of tea and wait for it all to blow over?
wonder how different the world would be if JFK and MLK weren't yeeted by jews.
>>482934398>Civilians must be ready to fight So you guys are getting your guns back because nobody wants to volunteer to defend your hostile and self-destructive regime?
GOD SAVE THE FREAT QUEEN .. ~DO TATH .. IM racist...but we all love our disreptsI an Meller men .. .. we not say say .. we get an love love not upset .. , can I only scratchetch SAY wONdeERFUL .. SORRY THAyts me Drunk off the Game ..
>>482944486NOT CIE FOR REAL WOMEN ..
>>482944566STARMER WE GETTING READY .. ... I CANNOT SAY BUT .. BOOM BOOM ..
>>482944610>>482944704>>482944826In the quiet town of Tiddleshire, Cauldron, the awkward dreamer with a head full of bizarre thoughts, had long been known for his peculiar ideas and unfathomable daydreams. One particularly mundane Tuesday, he decided to embark on what he dubbed a “pilgrimage to the J*sh.” The J*sh was rumored to be a mystical being, a legend whispered about in the local chat rooms and conspiracy forums. They claimed the J*sh held secrets to the universe, wisdom from eons past, and the ability to grant wishes.Cauldron, with his curious mind and penchant for the odd, felt drawn to this journey, picturing himself standing before the J*sh, perhaps gaining insight that would transform his timid existence. Armed with nothing but a half-eaten packet of biscuits and a rickety old map hastily drawn by someone’s cousin, he set off on his adventure.After hours of stumbling through dense woods and losing his way more times than he could count, Cauldron finally arrived at a clearing. There, before him, was a decrepit structure, covered in vines and moss, which he recognized as the legendary lair of the J*sh. Heart pounding with excitement, he stepped inside, ready for enlightenment.What he found, however, was not the serene, wise figure he had imagined but a grotesque assembly of what he could only describe as ancient mutants. The air was thick with an indescribable odor, a mix of damp earth and something far less pleasant. And there, in the center of the dimly lit room, was the J*sh—a writhing mass of flesh and odd features, blinking at him with multiple eyes that glimmered like marbles in the dark.
>>482944610>>482944704>>482944826Cauldron blinked in disbelief, feeling the initial thrill of the pilgrimage quickly morph into horror. The J*sh’s appearance was bizarre, but what truly shocked him was its cloaca—a gaping orifice unlike anything he had seen before, making him question everything he thought he knew about life, evolution, and the very nature of existence. "What have I gotten myself into?" he thought, desperately wishing he could turn back time.“Welcome, seeker!” the J*sh croaked, its voice reverberating through the chamber. “I am the keeper of secrets, and you have come to learn the truth.” As it spoke, Cauldron's mind raced with panic. He had expected wisdom, perhaps a cryptic message about the meaning of life, but now he was face-to-face with a creature that had defied all logic. Trying to maintain his composure, he stammered, “Uh, I, um, wanted to know about, you know, life’s mysteries and…stuff?” His cheeks burned with embarrassment, and he couldn’t help but wonder if this had been a colossal mistake. The J*sh merely laughed, a sound that echoed ominously in the chamber. “Ah, but you see, young pilgrim, the truth is often hidden in the grotesque. You must embrace the strange if you wish to find meaning!”
>>482944610>>482944704>>482944826Cauldron couldn’t believe what he was hearing. All he wanted was a meaningful conversation, not a lecture on the value of the bizarre. He nodded awkwardly, feeling trapped in a surreal nightmare. After what felt like hours of strange riddles and even stranger explanations about evolution and the cosmic significance of cloacas, Cauldron finally found an opening. “Thanks, but I think I’ll…um, go now,” he managed, backing away slowly. As he fled the J*sh’s lair, the world outside felt strangely bright and normal, as if he had just escaped a dark dream. He couldn’t shake the unsettling images from his mind, the bizarre conversation lingering like a bad taste in his mouth. Back in Tiddleshire, he vowed never to take another pilgrimage, especially not to a being with such unorthodox anatomy. Instead, he returned to his room, where he could lose himself in the comforting embrace of his fantasy novels and games, far away from the reality of ancient mutants and their grotesque cloacas. And thus, Cauldron’s adventure became yet another odd story in his collection of bizarre experiences, a reminder that sometimes, the journey to seek wisdom can lead you to the most unexpected—and unsettling—places.
>>482937030>>482937030>>482937030
>>482945246Z E S T YESTY
>>482945293bump that shit my brigga
>>482941835SO MATE .. BRILL ..CAN I ASK YOU THIS ..same .. JEELIES FROM NORTY NORTH . AN LISTEN ask aHOW ANGRY ..an yet I GO FIND A WEAPON TO KILL THEM .. ..oh .. NO SERIOUSLY ! .. HATED GOVT .. KILL THEM ALL ..
>>482936626forgot your memeflag, dickskin-bandit
>>482945395On an otherwise unremarkable Thursday, Cauldron found himself wandering the aisles of the local Co-op, searching for something to liven up his mundane existence. As he scanned the shelves for snacks—crisps, biscuits, and a suspicious amount of frozen pizza—he caught sight of her: a cute oriental girl named Tingling, expertly navigating the produce section. Her laughter rang out like music, and for a moment, time stood still. Cauldron’s heart raced as he imagined charming her with witty banter about organic bananas. But just as he mustered the courage to approach, the entrance burst open, and in strode Fake Mair. Known for his erratic behavior and self-proclaimed status as a “social guru,” he had a talent for ruining even the most serene moments. With disheveled hair and mismatched clothes, he shouted, “Oi, everyone! Gather ‘round! I’ve got wisdom to share!”The once peaceful atmosphere morphed into chaos. Tingling’s attention shifted to Fake Mair, her eyes wide with a mix of curiosity and concern. Cauldron felt his chances of speaking to her evaporate. Instead of confidently approaching, he froze, watching Fake Mair launch into a bizarre demonstration of “social techniques” involving exaggerated hand gestures.“Listen up, you lot! To win a girl’s heart, you’ve got to—” he blared, flailing his arms. Cauldron groaned internally. Fake Mair was doing the opposite of charm; he was driving Tingling away. “Who invited this guy?” Cauldron muttered, wishing he could disappear.
>>482946149Tingling rolled her eyes, stepping back, clearly uncomfortable. The opportunity he’d dreamt of slipped away as Fake Mair continued his cringeworthy performance, oblivious to the bewildered shoppers. With a heavy heart, Cauldron shuffled toward the exit, resigned to drown his sorrows in the comfort of his room. He glanced back one last time—Tingling was trying to sneak away, her patience worn thin. As he stepped outside, cool air hit him like a splash of cold water. Maybe next time he’d approach a girl without a manic disruptor nearby. He vowed to return to the Co-op, determined to find another chance to connect, even if it meant navigating the unpredictable chaos of his town.
Reform getting smashed everytime they post since Farage's disastrous interview.https://nitter.poast.org/reformparty_uk/status/1839266293989376393
>>482944223How long until they to institute compulsory military service?
>>482934398/pol/ tourist here, I actually just saw this headline and came to ask wtf this is about. Why would we go to war with Russia? Why would we need a juicy army as an island + a part of NATO? Couldn't we just threaten invaders with nukes or is that for whatever reason retarded?Also is the reason why nobody wants to enlist because mass importation of non-british peoples and the whole diversity push fracturing communities and crushing any sense of pride / duty of being British or is nobody wanting to enlist just an effect of modern society in general?Thoughts on this or spoonfeed me non-schizo non-meme info on the subject please
>>482947642Also I'm generally uneducated and dumb so explain it in a simple way
this dumb bitch thinks we have 50+ years on this earth lol
>>482947642The first thing we must fight is the Islamification of the UK.It is unacceptable the way they are treated with kid gloves and yet any white person who uses hurty words goes to prison. The establishment pigs have stolen my country, culture and birthright and now you expect my children to defend it.
Fair
To
Say
I
Win
Am gay
Nice try pal but you lose
>>482948155Of course she's a HR bint.
Sadcunt hours
1pbtid hours
I win
I won already
nope
Did tho, it obvious
I drank 3 pints of orange juice.I win
My posts were just better
Your concessions: accepted
>were bettermine ARE betterI win
It's obvious to see I'm the mvp
still creasing at "minge" ngl
True winning comes from me
