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/r9k/ - ROBOT9001

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File: images (13).jpg (8 KB, 259x194)
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Small revenges on normies that you may have achieved

> Be me
> Be a gassy fellow due to gastritis
> Walking down the street and I need to let a fart out. Is bad, fucking mustard gas but I don't give a shit if I'm in public
> Someone behind me yells "eeew wtf was that?"
> Pack of zoomers, skinny kids with stupid haircuts and a couple of roasties
> My time has come. Here comes another one
> "Eeeww Justin. Was that you? I'm going to throw up! Stop it!"
> Remember that farts are basically microscopic shit particles. I ravel on the thought of zoomers basically inhaling my shit. Continue.
> Roastie realizes that I have been walking in front of them this whole time
> "I think that guy is the one shitting himself"
> They change the sidewalk
> No gonna let that happen. Let them forget about me after a few bad stares.
> Put on my jacket and change sidewalks to walk in front of them without them noticing me
> Open the gates of the vomitive dimension and let out a miasma of death and disease that I was building up
> Roasties scream. The tards let a resounding "what the fuck bro?"
> They stop as they lament the situation I continue as if nothing happened.
> Heard them say as I was getting farter "We should tell a police officer"
> Mfw zoomers consumed my feces and they were thinking of telling a police officer about it.
File: based.jpg (119 KB, 647x538)
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holy fucking shit haha
Based brap bro.
Unfortunately unoriginal.
Hmmm... how does one induce gastritis?
Bad eating habits. I would be surprised if 90% of you people don't have gastritis.
It's gotta be more than that, my farts are unreliable (can go days without) and they do not smell of death, just the average eggs smell that makes a grown man giggle into his pillows at 3 in the morning.

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