Brand New Edition
I hope you find out what you want, I already know what I amAnd if it makes you less sad, we'll start talking againYou can tell me how vile I already know that I am
i wish we could just speaki don't want to wait for christmas just for us to barely talk to each otherwhy is this chasm between us so wide?
>>75480728Why do you guys even like me? Do you?
>>75480764You know what you're doing. You need to stop or else it will get worse. Realize the gravity of your situation and just stop.
i keep going between being hurt and crying to having absolutely nothing but hate for you.im so tired and im in so much pain. why did you do this?-m
>>75480992i hope your daylist fucking sucks today
>>75481013sorry. you don't want to talk to me and should never again, but like i said, if it makes you less sad.
Skibidi, Rizz be mid af bruh dead ass-ohio
i hope i am not being ghosted
AliI loathe you to the depths of my soul and I genuinely wish I could forget you ever even existed, hopefully you've already been killed for being the subhuman you are ideally beaten to death. If you ever come back to discord I will send those photos of your sister to the cops and ruin your life forever. Fuck you obese child raping pig.You know who this is
dear E,Fuck you.E
fat pedophile one day you will get what is coming
ADreamt about you like 3 times last night despite all the years that have passed, are you casting some spells to remind me of you or some cursed shit (of course that last part is a bleak joke because I do not believe in such things and you didn't when I knew you)R
>>75481167Hi A I love u <3
To hiraI've been thinking about you a lot these last few weeks. I think I've put you on a pedestal even though I said I wouldn't. I've invested way too much of myself in you and I'm so incredibly depressed and broken and it's partially your fault. I don't think it was right of you to constantly want to "date" me and then tell me you changed your mind. This time, you told me it was out of pity. How exactly am I supposed to feel ... positive about being used like that? I know you've apologized, but honestly? A simple sorry just isn't enough to smother the hurt I feel. You're special to me and we could trust each other with everything and anything. I was hoping we could dig ourselves out of this cycle and be friends forever, wishful thinking I know. But in the end we're just another textbook codependent unhealthy relationship story. I know I lashed out at you, I said really mean things... mostly it was just an outpouring of all the anger I have towards you over everything over these last few years. I don't have any excuse. I just wanted you to feel hurt like I do. It's shitty, I know, part of me is jealous at how you seem so unbothered by it all. For months I've tried to put everything behind me and accept being just friends but you had to pull me back in and start the cycle again. You know that I'm soft on you and that if you give me a chance I would never be strong enough to say no. I would hurt myself just to be near you, and I have, so many times. It's unhealthy and bad and I hate myself for how much I care about you. In the end, I guess it's my fault. Like always. You said we're bad for each other, but why couldn't you try to be good for me, then? Whatever, I do hope everything goes well for you, though. You're still always gonna have a place in my heart and I wish for nothing but the best for you. You're still a jerk tho.your former best friendcTo everyone else sorry for dumping my gross feelings on here. I guess it's cathartic.
NOBODY MOVETHERESBLOODON THE FLOORAND I CANTFINDMY HEART
far away from home i sob, i weep, the pain has begun to seep.
taking a train to catch a plane all the while filled with FUCKING DISDAIN
It sucks having to do community service with kids because they're annoying ipad kids who wanna throw hands if you try to take anything away so your job can be easier. I should be legally allowed to deck a child if they act like an annoying spoiled shithead or atleast deck the parents for failing to raise their crotchspawn right. Some people should've been forcefully sterilized
>>75480764We will not start talking again.
>>75480764Message me then.
>>75482261Why do you have to do community service?
>>75482343University requirement and I needed a few hours in for a semester, fucking gay if you ask me
>>75482261Lay off the chilluns and get to chillan.
none of the girls here are as pretty as you
>>75482443Yuengling the goat frfr
3 drinks before flight? not enough. i should have gotten completely sloshed. don't you ever fucking write a single letter to me again, you know i read these threads. ignore it when i write to you as well. thanks. a heartfelt letter will come later, once i can think
eeeeee zaddy you're back :3
>>75482717notice me now, you can't ignore me forever
>>75483199Where are you flying?
i still want to fucking die right here right now
>>75483320Why? What's wrong? Do you want to talk?
>>75483227back home, of course. the place i hate most in the world.
>>75483332You said someone write letters to you? What is your or their initial?
>>75483344that is so very unimportant. if they read this, they will know it is me.
There is no safe place.
i keep getting sick. i can barely hold a job. i find it increasingly hard to care about anything. you probably think you need closure but you dont. your closure should be that life is shit.
>>75483329there's lots of wrong, and here's the thing, i want to talk, but i'm not very capable of talking, i'm Extremely depressed and suicidal, i already planned my suicide carefully and i have resources for suicide already
>>75483642Is there something in your life, that if it changed, you would want to live?
>>75483816no, i'm literally insane and mentally ill for life
I know that you don't care about me anymore. I'm sorry. I accept that. but I just want you to know that I still love you.
>is basically an honorary fireman
>>75484028Shut the fuck up. You never loved me
how would that sort of thing even work? would the pla or whoever show up at your family's home and detain them until you came back to the mainland for a talk?
>>75484028Can't you just message. I miss someone so much.
I WANTTOFuckingDie right NOWFUCK THIS LIFE TO DEATH
Hey MI somehow fell even lower than you expected of me, its all coming to a head and then we'll meet again
>>75483924I am too. Do you want to be friends, I'm a female, though? Please don't die. Do you want to talk on discord.
>>75484398What's wrong, anon? Did something happen?
>>75484680look anon, i even believe that you're a biological female, but i strongly advise to never even mention nor share your contacts on a fucking anonymous image boardi do appreciate the kind sentiment of you caring enough to put yourself at risk of suggesting your discord but that's something i have to refuse, discord is a fucking mistakehowever, if you want to be friends, then you can only try you hardest to stop me in the middle of those anons, it's almost impossible but you can try>>75484688i have no future nor nothing to live, that's what happen
>>75484398>>75484413Just die already. What are you waiting for.
>>75484820that's what throwaways are for. i hope your passing is quick and peaceful anonny i wish i had the courage
>>75484830i don't know>>75484832same anon, i wish i could die in my sleep
A favela is a slum or shanty town. Is this true? Are you Brazilian? I've never met a Brazilian.
So apparently art is just Unconscious casting. Explains why my works are so ugly.
>>75484860brazillians aren't real they only exist online
>>75484869Then who was favela???
I miss you so much. Why did you stop responding?
>>75484886favelas aren't real either they only exist in the popular imagination due to hollywood films. south america is almost entirely jungle and the descendants of the Inca
>>75484866.... because your insides are ugly?
>>75484886Flava flave cchhhh'yyyeeeaaahhh bbbboooiiiiii
>>75484860>>75484869>>75484886>>75484913it's starting to feel like i'm somekind of new specimen anons from r9k are either shocked or intrigued by it
>>75484907because you called me a racial slur even after I told you to stop
>>75484932Nah, I tapped my unconscious dry. I need to draw from the collective one now if I want to flow.
>>75484959Must be someone else. I never use slurs, ever.
>>75484959I will never stop saying the word nigger Never ever.
>>75485013I'll bite, why do you think she stopped responding to you?
>>75485028what's your thoughts that usa went to shit over nigger floyd dying to a cop's nigger-killing-knee?
>>75485053You know what he od-ed on fent and gave that cashier a fake $20 bill for a banana. That's what.
>>75480728The second you let go was the second I realized you were not meant for me. I hate you for wasting my time
>>75485065clown world we are surviving it, right?
>>75485039He. I think maybe he found a girlfriend? Nothing happened so that's all I can guess.
>>75485118How long were you talking to him for?
......I've missed you. Wait for me, say my name. I thought that was you but I was unsure. Panic brief smile. This game is mental torture. I'd really like to have a talk. I will respond. Why is this so difficult? Throwing this into the void. The triggers of the Chan. Other transmissions are open.
>>75485140We used to be together, lived together.
>>75485155When did you stop living together? Did you break up?
>>75485140Nvm though. He doesn't want to talk so it's stupid of me to want to. I need to have some self respect.
>>75485163It doesn't matter. He broke up. I hope you find whoever you are looking for.
>>75485087Yes. Yes that's correct.
>>75485171>>75485200is this schizoposting or are there two of you? my confusion mounts.
>>75485225There's one anonymous and you're talking to yourself on here. You're the real schizo. We're all figments of your imagination. WAKE UP!
>>75485225That's me in both.
>>75485256Go look in the mirror schizo. Oh wait. You can't. You're in a straight jacket locked in a padded cell. This is a weird dream but it's better than the former. Don't wake up.
Hey EI am sorry I ruined everything. Really. It still haunts me to this day. I still love you in the most obnoxiously delusional way and it has yet to change. I can't even open up to others the way I did with you. It was my fault and I hope you are doing good these days.
They're so butthurt i'm better in drawing than the two of them combined they destroyed my reputation.I'm so glad he's with me... Thank you so much
>>75485388ngl I'm starting to feel butthurt too at ur drawing ability and those dubs
i dont like oversleeping
>>75480728Hey S,Just when I was going to move on, you caught my attention again. I'm still going to pursue my own goals, but when you need me I'll be there.
I wish someone thought about me regularly.
i hate my life and i want to fucking die right now
>>75485081Letting them drain you, letting them linger on in that hatred is the real waste. Let go entirely or send them only love which benefits the both of you and all of humanity.
I know we haven't talked in a bit but you have always been like a phantom limb to me. I'm sorry I was oblivious. I'm sorry I ran on impulse. This state ruined me. I hope you are okay.
>>75485081>>75485589Do what is best for you and at your own pace, but understand you are not weak if you still have love for them and you do not have to hate them to move on. Best wishes, Anon
>>75485605>the state ruined mewhat does this mean?
I forgive you.I'm sorry too.
hope that fat pedophile burns in hell fat faggot pedophile
>>75485739who you're refering to? what pedophile?
Nice to know we're cool. We should talk, there's a shitload to catch up on. I'll try not to make it weird.
Astaroth wiling Asmodai ensure
>>75485612platitudinous bullshit, fact of the matter is that some pairings are simply mistakes. there are at least a couple of people in my life that i feel like a worse person for having encountered, both of them i met online to no one's surprise. i can't even comfort that anon you're replying to by reminding them that ALL they lost was time because time is the most precious resource there is.if you're disloyal or some sociopath or a bullshitting retard, fuck you. learn to act right, just because you're a damaged person with a shit life and you have some hang-up or several doesn't vindicate you when you fuck other people around.
>>75485612talking mostly about what's being said in the pic you posted rather than the contents of your post just to make it clear.
>>75485971based. It hurts getting attached to people only to realize they are full of it and out to get you
>>75485971your projections, inability to assume nuance and/or preference to look for things to be angry about do not a platitude make you are entitled to your feelings and almost everything you are saying is valid. but the point here was not that everyone is entitled to your time, ACTIONABLE expressions of love, or loyalty, but that the capacity to love, even people who are toxic and we are perhaps better off without, Love itself, is something that transcendsor at the very least that is message I am meaning to transmit.However if you still feel worse off for the affect or effects of another persons presence in your life you probably have more work to do. Does not mean they were not harmful, genuinely detrimental and in the realest way but you dont throw in the towel at going >oughh uoohaghgh I am forever altered fuck youuuand just seethe about it and leap at other peoples throats when theyre trying to heal and spread healing manDont let the bastards MKUltra you and the sanctity of real, divine, purest Love. It is yours and it is Youhttps://youtu.be/vx4kLgnFexo?si=ctL6DBYX4nNIW6EA
>>75485689I hope you've had a nice day
expressing your feelings through song lyrics is teenager shit. its like thinking your feelings are actually important and have some grand meaning. they dont. try your best to COMMUNICATE or shut up
>>75486132>implying their feelings aren't important
>>75486132YOU'RE SO CLOSE AND IT'S YOU THAT I BELIEVE INSO CLOSEBUT SO FAR AWAY SO FAR I CAN'T TOUCHI'LL HOLD ON CAUSE IT'S YOU I LOVE SO DEARLYWHEN THE RAIN, THE STORM, AND ALL IS DONECARESS ME WITH YOUR SWEET LULLABY
>>75486163Dope lyrics my fren
>>75486132I just expressed/elaborated upon my perspective for three paragraphs you massive seeping hemorrhoid. the song is for optional emphasis in expressing what cannot be in three thousand paragraphs but to translate it to m i d w i tI am saying if you think the principles or Love I am speaking of is something other people even have the ability to tarnish, if you think it is fucking worth it to screech at me when the problems you need to address you are clearly a long ways off from even setting sights on.. welp. I wish you grace and to highlight, >it is yours and it is YouBy extension, I am going to love as hard I always have without shame and that shouldnt threaten you because it is no threat to you. You would benefit from doing the same but again, youre entitled to your path and your pace
remorse is one thing, but >regret is never anything more than an excuse youre trying to make for yourself by pinning the fact that you didnt learn a lesson you could have on others involved. Simple as Of course I am expressing my views through semantic lens and words have meaning but with the inherent meaninglessness of life all meanings can be co-opted and evolved
certain definitions of>forgiveness are also not necessary in the process of moving on You can love AND hate someone. >forgiveness is for *your* sake, hating someone else is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die~etc bullshit, now THAT tripe should rightfully be disdained as fucking platitude if your individual case basis calls for it should you resent someone forever for fucking you around? youd probably be lighter in spirit if you didnt. but are you wrong to? is hate even the same as resentment? is either condemnation? is your spirit big enough to contain it all, realistically, and is it worth it to you? should you try to toxic-positivity or spiritual-bypass your way to true forgiveness/Acceptance by valuing the echoes of innumerable social media (((life coaches)))? idfk bro i cant answer for you and you cant answer for me. there are some educated guesses we can both make but in the end.. https://youtu.be/XwHVS7Q5cOI?si=Fp5g90lzjxcpRGTh
Rate my newest manga idea"I love being a 12 yo's puppy and loving her perfect size 7 shoes"Where an elderly Japanese man is isekai'd into a Finnish family as the family dog on a little girl's 12 birthday
>>75486097Very well said, Anon. It's a good message.
>>75486305I am glad you found anything resonant or relatable in my attempt to condense Good night and take care, Anonymousse with badge of pearl for my wisedumbs on top
>>75486302You got tough competition that's hard to top.
i love isolating myself and not talking to anyone for extended periods of time. why dont i do it again?
i dont want to do anything. im just waiting to die. nothing makes me happy and everything is boring.
I just got ghosted by this foot fetishist pedophile for being too weird? Basically I met him yesterday I we had this ERP where I listened to his sob story and he told me about his foot fetish, he wanted me to pretend that I was a little girl and he would be himself. This went on and I tried so hard to get him to fuck me, and sucked his dick in the erp etc etc but he just refused, eventually I stopped sucking him off and used my feet to cause him to finish off his jerk and make him cum, I licking up the cum off my toes afterwards, but that was it. Now today he shows up again and is calling me master and stuff like that, wants me to dominate. Eventually he makes a new ERP thread about my imaginary friends whose feet he has been watching for awhile because apparently my feet aren't enough for him. I get mad, ask him why I have to be master tell him that I want him to dominate and use my body as his tool. To this he replied. "Fuck this I'm out you're really weird" Like first of all I'm overlooking that you're a foot fetishist pedophile and I'm in the wrong because I want you to be a fucking man, what is wrong with moids these days.
>>75486610Damn, uh...Maybe he felt self conscious suddenly. I guess he's just going to miss out then? Find another gooner to milk.
>>75486132hehehahahehehuahahee>NO EVERYTHING'S ABOUT MEMaybe music is just, you know, something you can relate to or can you not comprehend that two people listening to the same song might have different interest in or interpretations of?
>>75484292yes, I do. why do you say that?
>>75486610>Like first of all I'm overlooking that you're a foot fetishist pedophilet. person who gets upset after behaving as a plaything for a foot fetishist pedophileWere you diddled, sweetheart?
i hope i develop alzheimers
Please don't stay away forever.
>>75486610I'm sorry but this is the funniest shit I've read in months thank you for posting it
SYou're a piece of shit and you wasted my time. You'll die unhappy and unactualized.
>>75486284>should you resent someone forever for fucking you around? youd probably be lighter in spirit if you didnt. but are you wrong to?Yes.
>>75486317>Good night and take careb-but the night is just begin:(
>>75486927wow super mad :( keep the head up im sure you are miles better
I really hate that I wish that was for me. I need to stop this nonsense.
>>75487118I think it is for you. Can you send a message?
I HAAAAATTEEEEE THE HOLIDAY SEASONNNNNNNNNNNEITHER JUST ACT NORMAL AND DO NORMAL SHIT OR FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
HELLO STEVE WOULD YOU LIKE TO SCHEDULE A NORMAL INTERACTIONSURE HILDA THAT SOUNDS GREAT LETS DO THURSDAY A 1 PMOK STEVE WORKS FOR ME SEE YOU THEN>THURSDAY ARRIVES, 1 PM>STEVE AND HILDA MEET>IT GOES SMOOTHLY, NEITHER ACCUSING THE OTHER OF DOING WRONG
PEOPLEHAVE HAD CONVERSATIONSWHERE I DON'T KNOW WHAT WAS SAID!!!!!!THIS IS OUTRAGEOUSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*HEAD EXPLODES*
WHERE ARE MY GOOD PRESENTSYOUR PRESETNS SH OULD HAVE BEEN MY PRESENTS WHY DON'T I HAVE GOOD PRESENTS TOORARARARARAFEAHAHP ;;_;; ARAYHGARH >:( THESER ARE NOTA CCEPTABLE OFERSINGS
WHY *SNIFFLE* DID YOU NOT DO THOSE THINGS THAT WOULDN'T HAVE *SNIFFLE* SHOWN THAT *SNIFF* YOU DIDN'T REALLY LOVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE *SOBBING*
>>75487292be a good noodle eat your food and take less adderall today anonny
IT'S THE COMPLETELY ASYMMETRICAL AND HYPOCRITICAL NARCISSIST GAMES YOU *DON'T* PLAY ALONG WITHTHAT WILL CAUSE TO BE TORTURED FOREVER
sorry just had to get that off my chest there haha
stop adding me back and then deleting me after stop giving weird excuses to harass me.>im retarded i added u to say something but its finewhat dude? just say it? you either want to be my friend or not
>>75486097>your projections, inability to assume nuance and/or preference to look for things to be angry about do not a platitude makethey're neither projections nor inability to assume nuance. there's nothing nuanced about the image you shared, it reads like motivational instagram horse shit for dumb women who can't face the reality of their situation.>you are entitled to your feelings and almost everything you are saying is valid.i know, and i don't need you to tell me that. lol.>Love itself, is something that transcendsbut it isn't, and this is the platitude. "love transcends" doesn't mean anything, it's just retarded gobbledygook. you know what transcends? prudence and smart decision making. knowing how to vet obviously worthless people and cutting out the cunts in your life. not being an idiot who has their time wasted by ungrateful people who don't payback your good intentions and loyalty in earnest. say something with some substance, because "love transcends" has none.>Dont let the bastards MKUltra you and the sanctity of real, divine, purest Love. It is yours and it is Youmore retardation but if it wasn't prefaced by a mountain of other retardation it might almost sound pleasantly quasi-mystical. anyway, cynically greentexting what i said about being worse off for meeting certain people in that dismissive way isn't making any kind of point, it's just glib. everyone is permanently altered from any meaningful interaction with another person. if that's a source of derision to you, i think you're the one who has some work to do.
It's all just a goofJust some goober shit
>>75486017i wouldn't say in my case that they're out to get me, they just hid how vile they were from me until i'd dumped a significant amount of my time into the interaction, but otherwise yeah, agreed.
>>75487431Oh, go read you books. Between the both of you, you'd never have half the fucking brain to think for your selves.
>>75487455*kisses u* MWAH
Aaaaah shit I meant "hey"
>>75487431>say something with some substance, because "love transcends" has none.It does; just not for you.nta
>>75487482Fucking hell. Another day. Drunk and bored. Lets shitpost.>It does; just not for you.What's your star sign?If You want to skip the credits, I'll be calling you cluster B.
>>75487522nta but Taurus :)
>>75487528Am that anon: who gives a fuck? Go blame the stars because your head's that far up your assI'm about to start rapping in this shitpost thread while hoping you uh..hrmhead, thread, hole, deadI'll get it eventually
>>75487522Feel free to call me whatever you want. Neither you nor your opinions mean anything to me.
>>75487585>Cluster B boss bitch posting Charlotte okYou're gonna die alone or at least despised
>>75487559But I was curious what kind of horoscope bullshit you'd pull up for Taurus now I'm disappointed. while hoping you fall dead?? that works
>>75487620Do you have any more? Give me some more. I want your best . . .
i keep crying for no reason
>>75487709For what reason are you crying?
>>75487643>I want your bestOkay.
>>75487743Oh wow, it's you. It's big chomper himself. kekI shoulda recce'd the absolute shitter energy and aura
Working in warehouse cooler was fun and good, just me, my order, and a cold freezer. But ever since the company hired too many workers they're now looking for people to fire. Me being brain damaged due to head trauma I really can't work that fast even though I'm giving it my all thus putting me on the chopping block. I don't mind getting fired since some of my coworkers need the money more than me but it does make me wonder. Whats a good job for a slow brain tard like me anyways? Pretty sure every job needs fast people not slowpokes.
>I want your bestYou?
if I can't be with you I kinda wanna kill myself
>>75487926I feel the same about someone but I would never tell him because that's manipulative. You will push them away if you act like that.
>>75487965no I don't want to tell him either. how long have you felt like me anon?
>>75488029More than a year and a half
>>75487926Don't, S. I love who you are as a person despite your flaws.I know you have ___ and I don't care. When you get locked out in the cold, call me.
>>75488106do you have any plans to leave? >>75488128s? i think you may be mistaking me for someone else, anon.
lose more weight
SI'm sorry I was so shitty and the situation we found ourselves in wasn't much better. I had a lot of fun together with you and I would never trade the memories for anything. I was really, honest to God or whatever power that might be, positive that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I had so may selfish ideals and fantasies floating around in my head for the two of us, and for a short time, I even deluded myself that I could make them a reality despite everything. However, I just couldn't be the person you needed me to be, even past the most salient issues. Some days, I wish I didn't feel the ways I did just so that we could still just enjoy each other's company. You have so many amazing qualities that, as much as it pains me to say it, I'm positive you'll be able to find someone who CAN be the person you need them to be. Likewise, I'm not going to spit in the face of all these hurt feelings and wallow in self pity or whatever other fucking bullshit I fling at myself. I'm going to keep pressing onwards, becoming a better person, and in time do my best to be happy wherever that takes me. Until then, I guess I'll just keep going to see my goofy ass therapist. I probably could have worded all this better but I'm already going way past my bedtime. I'm not doing it justice, but I gotta let this shit out somewhere.
23 hours and 55 minutes. I'll count to 10 and reset the clock.
I don't even care if you're cheating on her. That is one peculiar fucking smell. A smell I don't think I've ever smelled in this house before.Did you get yourself a side piece, dad? I can smell your dinner that you re-heated but that other smell. Never. NEVER.
Fuck, it's got that weird tangy nose-feel of perfume. You've really been naughty.
There's no way that's just a new soap at work
i want to die so bad man
I don't know who you are or what you want from me. I'm not mad anymore, because you just get really numb to it. It's everywhere and never stops. I don't care what you want me to do, just leave the people I love alone in exchange. You fucking won but you keep going. Why would you torture someone like this? I guess it could be pretty funny funnily seeing a degenerate fap. You just won't stop inflicting so much pain on me, and I and 1 pray that wasn't the case for ny friends and family. The damage to me is pretty but please stop hurting them. Please, I'm going to blow my brains out if I ruin the lives of the people I care about.
Had every fucking chance, skank
Can't take it no more, I gave it everything I hadCan't see the world without everything lookin' badTransient psychosis got me looking kinda hadAnother litre of wine and I'll be back, if you hear that
Who actually fucking cares
i love having panic attacks and crying every day
I hope my soulmate is here in this world somewhere in this lifetime, I hope i get to meet you one day
the highlight of my day is taking an adderall. sometimes it gives me hallucinations and i want to kill myself every time it wears off but at least i feel somewhat okay for those few hours.
>>75488505It doesn't fall off overnight, retard.
i do not get the appeal of bingeing when you are depressed. i understand depression and other mental illness can make someone binge, but i only want to starve when i feel bad.
>>75489382literally just stop eating man its that easy
I don't want to be famous
happy birthday anon sorry sorry
i cannot wear my contact because i accidentally scratched myself in the eye. i am fucking subhuman iq
>>75489392Wow. No. It's calories in, calories out.
>>75489425i went from bmi 21 to 15 by just not eating i sometimes did walking but only sometimes
>>75489429Nutrition. Protein, fiber...
>>75489383Stuffin' your guts one way or the otherIt's all just some shit
RYou're a dumb whore who's incapable of love. The only reason you're unhappy it's yourself, but I guess you like being the victim and all the drama. Anyway, if you ever want to choke on my dick while I spit on you, you know where to find meA
>>75489433It's called emotional eating. Some people do it when they're stressed. It's just a vice like anything else.
I don't think you understand how much I loved you
i miss how flat my stomach was when i went those four days without eating. i should have gone longer. im retarded.
adderall makes me so sleepy why do i even take this shit
i dont want to eat or sleep ever again
i want to fall in love and make nice memories. i think this weather is just getting to me, but i want to have at least one good experience that makes nearly two decades of mundane existence worth it. this will not happen before i die. i will die miserable and alone as i have always been.
how am i supposed to get the motivation to do anything? my self hatred makes me not want to live. i am not worthy of being alive. i cannot simply get rid of my self hatred. everyone that has ever been near me treats me like a zoo animal, or something to use for entertainment. i pay the price for being born not only unlovable but mentally defective. i do not want to leave my room. i cannot handle being in public, i still cling to my mother like i am a child. strangers often treat me like i am a child. my mom lies and tells me its because i am small, but i am not that small, and i know it is actually because of my pathetic demeanor. everyone that sees me automatically thinks less of me. i want to die alone in here, and i think i will. people scare me.
i have not worked in a year. i could never hold down a job anyway, because i would always get scared off by having to interact with people or i would become upset by change. i left my last job because of the extremely inappropriate manner the management treated me. though i was not the only one being harassed like that, and it was the longest job i had, so maybe i should have not been so sensitive. i always struggled with working especially when it came to customer interaction, but i was able to get through the shifts there. i thought i had made friends, even if those males only wanted to have sex with me, even if that one girl only felt pity for me. i remember when she offered me the rest of her food and i was happy because i felt valued, like someone actually wanted to be my friend, even though in reality they all gossiped about my anorexia. she only felt pity for me. i remember when my coworker, one of the ones that wanted to have sex with me, complimented me for being so skinny. and i remember when he put his hands on my clothes under the pretense of wanting to make an adjustment but i had already repeatedly told him i did not need his help and he did not listen and i know he only wanted an excuse to touch me. working is emotionally exhausting. i am pathetic because it seems like everyone else in the world can tolerate these injustices they face in their everyday life, but i cannot. my brain hyper focus on the most trivial of things that cause me to feel even remotely slighted. until i am no longer just slighted and instead experiencing intense agony. my brain creates most of my problems. i have not worked in a year. i do not know if i will get a job before i die. i am too humiliated to leave my bedroom and my parents often complain that they never see me. they have stopped pressuring me to get a job as they have finally accepted i am a failure and there is no hope for me. i do not like being a burden or a failure. i have to die.
i see videos of people experiencing genuine suffering. unspeakable things happen everyday to a lot of people, things that are actually traumatizing. these people suffer more than i ever could imagine, yet they still hold far more courage than me. i offer nothing, i only take up space, and i should not get to live.
I miss and love you
i do not understand how others openly worship entertainers, or politicians, or anyone in between without a second thought. i do not understand how people develop such strong parasocial relationships with these people to the point where they sincerely think that they know them on some deeper level. i do not understand why they will drop their entire paycheck on them or spend every waking moment publicly praising another human that they will never be close to or ever really know. i can enjoy some celebrities, but i cannot imagine actually deluding myself over them.
that fat green minecraft nigger with his braindead fanbase of children every time i hear about him it is some retarded faggot shit he did i want to see very bad things to happen to him i hope i will never hear of him again
showering on adderall feels like rape i wish i had passed out and hit my head or something i want to lose all of my memories
grape soda is better than orange soda
i need to take more adderall
I wish you loved me back
my cat stole both of my blankets im going to kill myself because i am cold but she can keep both of my blankets
I really wish you loved me back
if my cat ever bit or scratched me i would try to end my life immediately i do not want to do anything to upset her because i love her
I don't know which way I should try to commit suicide
i feel like i will pass out a loti want to take more adderall but i cant yet i pirated the sims again i had to keep trying over and over for like a week because the 57gb download kept being raped i will make cool awesome sim and they will have cool awesome life
my body is tingling from the adderall wow i love dopamine flooding my brain
i hope my cat knows that i love and appreciate her
>>75490627your cat loves you too
its like i can feel every atom inside my body its a positive feelingadderall makes my skin sensitive my own hand touching my arm makes it severely prickle its nice i wish i had someone to hug
>>75490645i hope so. she spends most of her time with me but it may be because i keep my room dark. its usually quiet in here too
fuck that is embarrassing. i was vulnerable in your dms and my brain had the nerve to wonder why you had not replied after two hours. i deleted the messages i sent. you do this as well so im sure you will not judge me too much if you even notice
if you close the doorthe night could last forever leave the sunshine outand say hello to neverall the people are dancing and theyre having such funi wish it could happen to mebut if you close the doorid never have to see the day again
you're the besti love you the most
i do not like to wear certain colors, like bright shades or pastels, because they bother me. often i tend to gravitate towards darker clothing, like black or navy blue. a few people have joked at me for this and i was mocked and called emo by someone before. i think people are severely retarded because dark clothing does not equal emo. i do not like bright colors however orange is pretty good. i am wearing an orange cardigan and i could live in this.as a kid i was obsessed with the scene and emo subcultures. i wanted to have that type of hairstyle too. but i never got around to it. i kind of still want to, just for fun before i kill myself, but the effort it would require is actually not worth it.
>>75490727This is such a great video thanks anon
i wish someone would message me. i might be asking for too much because i do not have anything particularly interesting to say and sometimes i accidentally ignore messages. i will try to be more engaging the next time someone dms me.
i feel pretty sick. returning to work finally, i do not want to be here. i dissociated so fucking hard last night. i keep doing things i don't even want to do. what the fuck is wrong with me?i'll dissociate the whole day today
I,Stupid girl. Absolute fucking idiot retard dumbass. I hate how I always have to drag you through everything. I have to do all the heavy lifting and hold your hand and spoon feed you every fucking crumb of explanation to get you to do anything that isn't just bitching and moaning. It would be so much easier to hate you but you're too cute and it makes me want to die.-D
i do feel guilty for not only my lack of interesting responses, but also my lack of responses overall. its why i was so reluctant to make further contact in the first place. i think i bait people into feeling sorry for me, so they talk to me out of pity. or if that is not the case, then i think i act in a manner that makes me appear more interesting than i really am. only initially as this lures people in to engage with me and then i ultimately disappoint them with how mundane i really am. someone did tell me that a few months ago, that i didnt meet their expectations for conversation, but looking back, i do not really care if that person thought i was boring. they were not worth my time in the first place. i really hope i caused them to feel annoyed and like i wasted their time, considering i wasted my own time tolerating and deflecting their creeptard remarks.
>>75490821there is nothing wrong with you. please do not blame yourself, you're just going through a lot right now!! major environment changes and all of that. it will be okay. you'll be okay because youre very strong and are capable of getting through it. i will be here. even if i cant help much, you will always have me here
i do not like when people spare my feelings. i do not like when people take pity on me. i do not like when people deny taking pity on me. it feels like gaslighting when people tell me they do not pity me, however i can not incessantly badger people. every interaction feels insincere. their pity feels like it is always the elephant in the room, serving as a barrier that stops me from being able to genuinely connect. everyone is at minimum subconsciously aware of their pity for me even when it always goes unstated. i would rather people tell me how they honestly feel even though it is very much capable of hurting me.
other than going on the train tracks to kill myself, what other options do I have to kill myself that aren't also hanging? cutting deep enough is doubtful, and I don't know if any combination of pills will work
>>75490821hey anon, i feel the same. i have to go to work in a little bit but I've spent the entire weekend doing nothing but crying like a like bitch. let's try to survive the day together...
i never used to feel like this. is my brain deteriorating or is it flourishing? as i age, am i simply acquiring more knowledge? knowledge that allows me to come to these conclusions that my younger self was naive to. i know i am correct no matter how much the people around me attempt to gaslight me. i do not want to partake in society and the only solution is to terminate my life. everyone i know gaslights me into continuing to go through the motions because my presence provides something, no matter how minuscule. in the past i have been guilty of doing the same thing, coercing others into accepting their existence. i am selfish and so is everyone else. nowadays when i tell someone that they should take their own life, i sincerely hold no malice. why is suicide so widely rejected by people? besides the obvious innate self-preservation, throughout history those that were in the upmost privileged positions in society were able to successfully convince those below them that anyone could be like them, selling dreams that could be achieved if only they worked hard enough. these lies are pushed so that everyday regular people are motivated to relentlessly toil with no end in sight, falsely led to believe that their hard labor is not only of their own inclination but that it is somehow a display of good character. before i never exactly understood how anyone could be proud of contributing to society, i never understood why i felt an urge to be a part of these contributions, but i do now. the majority of humans believe their existence is greater or more important than it really is, and it is not actually their fault. we are all brainwashed from the moment we leave the womb.
my cat is sweet and cute i think i do not deserve to have my cat i hope my cat feels loved by me
heyfuck youbest regards
waiting because i am selfish
its not worth arguing about. forget it. sorry.
i dont know why you have to be so harsh to me by immediately calling me a retard. i understand that you get frustrated with people easily. but you insulted me instantly. why cant you start off by saying you simply disagree?
i want to lose enough weight to disappear into thin air but that isnt possible i guess
I should start going to the gym or something; I'm just afraid my heart will explode because I took the jab
>>75490797III WEAR BLACK ON THE OUTSIDE CUZ BLACK IS HOW I FEEEEL ON THE INSIIIIDE
i will not be a bother
>>75480728You're not responsible for my happiness J, I'm sorry I made you feel pressured into being in a relationship with meWill you ever love me again? I can't fall asleep anymore without imagining you're by my side. It's sad to think you'll never reciprocate me, but I can't ignore the fact that I adore you and see you on every little thing. I'd never say that to your face, I know it'll only be met with your cold, indecisive gazeI'm so mad at myself for thinking someone could actually love me unconditionally, and for missing you so much despite everything
>>75490582Why do you want to?Originally
There's part of me hoping to be rescued somehow, but then there's the part that wants to be left alone, the part that is really afraid of other people, the part that doesn't seem to care, the part that's unable to do anything, the part that thinks I don't deserve it, the part that thinks the situation is unsalvageable, the part that thinks it's my own mess to fix, the part that thinks I really should die and so on.The parley between them isn't going anywhere and they're stuck in that place.I guesd eventually they'll all starve to death or get hit by a truck.Maybe.
i take more adderall kk
heart palpitations will rape me
Killing myself tonight. Goodnight. I love you.
i really believed in you; that you could believe in mei really dared to hope that i could show myself to you and that you wouldn't shrink awaymoreover, that you would even like me and not for my superficialities but for the real me: the faces i never show to anyone and hide from even myselfi guess i was just blinded by that hope; swept along by selfish emotion and revelling in the mirage of loveeven after it vanished i can't bring myself to let go of that faithit's the only thing left i believe ini can't help but pray that somewhere in the stars there will be some sign of you or that buried under the sands i'll find your oasis or at least the ruins where it once existed so that i might know it wasn't all in vain because if what i felt with you were mere delusion then i don't think i'll ever share my page with anyone
i reallyhate being ugly
The day matthew perry died I drank an entire bottle of jack daniels and woke up covered in my vomit and piss, G*d put a curse on all burn out alcoholics that day.....
>>75492378I mean the day before it was annoying drinking RN btw f
Being told I'm the greatest person you've ever met both made me the happiest I've ever been and wounded me like I've never been hurt before. If I'm that great, why did you choose her over me?
>>75492446Sis, he never loved you. He loved the attention and validation and the idea of you. Do not fool yourself into thinking his words were real when he chose someone else. You were already burned so be wise and love yourself and dont let it happen again
im literally killing myself
top geg mate how does someone even want to die hhahahhaa like just get a cat lmao
Sorry retard foidlets, just know he is fucking stacy and going on dates with her while you sit alone broken hearted and cry over him. How does it feel to get pumped and dumped lmao?This is what happens when you go for the good looking chads instead of finding decent people! Have fun rotting in hell alone
why the fuck are there so many normals on this board??you all are getting upset over shitty shortlived twitterredditdiscord relationships where you do shitty things to each other, block each other, dont learn from the mistakes or respect yourself, and then do the same shit again. you dont really know each other. you know surface level shit and pretend its soo deep and think wow this person really gets me! they fucking dont and thats why the relationship doesnt work. stop believing in these erelationships and get an irl person. fucking sick of all of you faggots acting like an eboy or egirl leaving you is the end of the fucking world. there are real problems out there. grow the fuck up.
>>75492854>stop believing in these erelationships and get an irl personnormalnigger
all relationships are for normalniggers kill yourself if you have a relationship
>>75492870im single as fuck and been single but im sick of these fags being melodramatic and threatening to kill themselves over a 2 month ebf or some shit
when you go, would you have the guts to say. i don't love you, like i loved you yesterday.i don't love you like i loved you yesterday.
>>75492854IndeedInternet people are nutjobs and e-relationships are a form of shared psychosis.
>>75492941But you're one of them
im so tired niggers
>>75492993Why did you catfish me again, Chuck?
>>75493003how did you know it was me man
im chuck and i dont like niggers
>>75492854wtf do you think this thread is for?
i want to drink hot chocolate with someone special i want to kill myswlf on december 25th
anons, despite being depressed and suicidal to the extreme, i'm also suffering from terrible health issues while being left for death by everyone, the urge of suicide is getting much higherthe only thing i have actually done is killed a criminal, and even when i don't regret this, i have thousands of regrets and remorse, like getting all this bullshit education, certification and degrees only to always be ghosted no matter how qualified i am, i want to fucking die
>>75493052something with more substance than self-pitying normals wanting to die over a fake discord "relationship"
my hair is thinning from the anorexia but at least i can hide it
im lonely all my life i want to hold hands with someone i want to cuddle with someone holy fuck i need to kill myself i will never have this
>>75493109>anonymous letters on /r9k/>substance and not about relationshipsare you pretending to be retarded or are you really this stupid?
i dont care as much as you think i do. i have come to realize you were a really bad friend. i will block you this time so you dont add me back with more excuses.
i bet spooks observe me sometimes to see what someone who's barely not schizo will be able to sus out about their crap
>>75493340trust me i know lol cya!
i want to fucking die, existance is nothing but pain and suffering and nothing else
gotta lose more weight 88poundsthats baaaaadd i gained some weight back
>>75493540>88 poundHow height?
>>75493633>How height?about this tall
>>75493457What if they don't know what's going on with each other and need wild schizos to joins the dots
yeah maybe i should keep my mouth shut sometimes
on the other hand maybe we should have a real country with citizenship for non-police
seriously, what the fuck i'm supposed to do, i have severe health issues that i'm suffering from and i'm already extremely depressed and suicida because i have no future nor nothing to live fori want to fucking die, how do i kill myself and be done with it already?
I miss our chats, our silly conversations and just interacting with you in general. I love you a whole lot, you're a great friend and I hate seeing you suffer. You feel cornered and feel forced to live with your boyfriend and his family but you don't have to stay there. Hell, we can you out of that country since you have nowhere to go. My sister can help you out and we can just be here to take care of you. I love you a ton, you don't even know how much I worry about. I think about your situation every day. Please, just reach out to me. My family can help you out
To the wealthy homosexual hypnotist who has been trying to force me to be gay for years so I can be his boyfriend, I will fucking end you if I ever see you again.
>>75492324It was your imagination. Nothing less or more.
yeah it sucks being stuck in this limbo together but not together at all but do you think i enjoy it. no i dont enjoy needing anything
A massive penis towers over you
>>75495104i don't enjoy posting on 4chan much less r9k but here i am, but i'm beyond miserable, i'm a lost cause
cmi've been feeling especially lonely these past couple days, and missing you quite a bit. not in the romantic sense - though i guess that still applies as well. i've just been remembering what it's like to be able to talk to someone about anything and everything. serious or not serious. connect with someone to the point where they understand everything you say, even if it boils down to the stupidest joke, or the most serious ponderings about life. felt really nice to have that with you. i wonder when - or if - i'll ever find that again. it's hard to say i will when i look at myself and think about who i am. took me basically two decades to find someone like you. doesn't seem like it's happening again anytime soon. at least i can look back on our time together. even if that reminiscence means i'll never be able to truly let go. hope you're doing well. miss you a lotj
>>75489460just do a once a month fast
>>75495986J-jeez anon, you're going to make me cry over here
dear v,I'm such a loser, and a failure. I'm not insane, you're insane. Can you laugh at me?E
I fucked my entire life over on purpose. I am extremely bitter over my entire life amounting to absolutely nothing.There is nothing left to salvage.Its rotten dust.I ruined 40 years of my life with one bad mistake.I really might just kill myself.
If ur not insane at this point, u better step it up.
I cannot believe this is my life.What have I done?
I'm such a fucking faggot
I could be working from home making 100k but I chose to commit suicide instead FUCK THIS EXISTENCE I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS WHAT HAPPENED TO MY ENTIRE LIFE THAT I RUINED ON PURPOSE WHY DID I DO THAT WHY I AM SUCH A FUCKING MORONI HAD 28K IN CRYPTO ASSETS AT THAT TIME NOW IM AT NEGATIVE OF SEVERAL THOUSANDI HAVE TO KILL MYSELF I HAVE TO KILL MYSELF ITS THE ONLY WAY OUT OF THIS FUCKING NIGHTMARE IM SCREAMING FOR A RELEASE
>>7549657628K in crypto assets is absolutely nothing compared to the million + career earnings differenceyou are 24 years oldyou will grieve this over your entire lifeor your mother will grieve her sons death
I have to go, I have to gothis is a nightmare im screaming wake me up
Please god make this all be a nightmare and I will wake up tomorrow working from home making 100k please god I beg you to help me I had the job, I had the job but I got scaredLaugh at me! laugh at me!
I am feeling chest pains now I am absolutely seething in rage at my entire life being flushed down a toilet bowl
someone wake me up. I said wake me up! Im screaming in a nightmare. I cannot handle this oh my god.
why did you disappear :( i told you i was going to be your friend
Ive been plunged into hell, the pain is beyond any comprehension.
I have to jump off a bridge, I have to jump off a bridge. My entire life is ruined, you don't understand. I ruined it, I ruined it.
>>75496629Be their friend harder. Message them a hundred times a day. Show up at their house with food and beer. Befriend their friends. Befriend their spouse.
I can barely string a sentence together anymore, whether im typing or speaking.My entire mind has failed meI dove headfirst into a pit of lava.
>>75496634How was it ruined, Anon?
This can't be happening. This cannot be happening. Every second of every day it happens, even though it cannot happen.
>>75496647>>75496576>>75496578I ruined everything, my entire life was set up but I ruined it.I can't explain how exactly it happened, I will go into a blind rage and panic.Let's just say, I will be grieving my entire life forever until the day I die.
I am extremely angry, extremely angry. I will never recover from this failure.This absolute failure that I cannot begin to describe for you to comprehend.
My dreams all turned into nightmares.I am a ghost now.You ever listened to that song, boulevard of broken dreams?They were talking about me.
many different forms of media are secret references to my lifeit goes as far as the Bible
Guess it's been time to seek greener pasture.
please someone kill me. please, let me be struck down by a bolt of lightning in a rainstorm. I cannot fathom my life.Nobody can fathom my absolute failure. When I start to approach it I begin to panic. My body was thrown into a pit of fire.
I am a corpse now
>>75496734why is that? are you suicidal too?
I have already attended my own funeral. The body is covered by a sheet of cloth. Together I will merge with the earth. In a place much better than this one.
>>75496740I cannot imagine living another week, let alone another month.When I think about my life I begin to panic.I cannot imagine turning age 25, let alone 35 or 45.But it would be a really subhuman thing to kill myself so I probably never will.I'm probably just gonna be a slimy worm crawling in a cave hollowed out with a butterknife
>>75496761>I'm probably just gonna be a slimy worm crawling in a cave hollowed out with a butterknifeReal creative there, what major did you take?Hold on, let me laugh at you.You went to college? And what happened?You're a joke.
please god help me from this nightmare save mewake me up, wake me upI pray to you every day to kill methe failure from 1.5 years ago will affect your next 45
I am knocking on the walls of eternity to allow me to enterNobody ruins their own life like meSo Actually I WinI Am UniqueI Am Special
I am suffocated every second of every day I can't breathe, I can't breathe
I have to escape, I dug my hole too deep and now I am in an. endless abyss falling into hellNone of this is real.This cannot be real, I just imagining this.
this cannot be real, this cannot be realHow could this happen?
None of this is really happening its just a projection of things that are happening in my own mind.I am the creator.
>>75493073Don't do it anon. I'll be spending Christmas under the mistletoe with S, and I hope you will also find your girlfriend in December.
Please wake me up!This nightmare!You don't understand how deep in the nightmare I am. How painful my failures are. I will carry them around until death. Until the exact moment that I die.
I need to be beaten over the head with a brick.
>>75496795Wanna compete in a life-ruining contest?
>>75496867you're a retard if you think this is over after "death"
>>75496885Surely, I am the winner by default.Unless you would rather drive door dash than make 250kMy life is so empty and rotten anyways that it probably wouldn't matter.But at least I would have something to feel proud about.My entire life prospects have simmered up in a pit of fire
My nightmare never ends, it never ends.
the gates of hell have opened and I walked into them.the gates of heaven were also opened but I chose to turn my back on god surely this is punishmentI am being punished in advancein eternal heaven my reward awaits me
please god oh god savior of mankind save me
NO!!!NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MY ENTIRE BODY IS IN PAIN
my breath smells like poop because I EAT SHIT.I FUCKING EAT A PILE OF SHIT.
I'm killing myself on December 29th if this doesn't stop. I'll be at a local park if you want to try and stop me. I'm sorry for whoever is going to find me and for dragging the people I care about into this. This is all your fault, you fucking sociopaths. You're inhuman and I hope you and all of your family do too. You know who you are. I don't want you to feel remorse or guilt, I just want you to suffer more than I have.
>>75496888in heaven my failures won't bother meit will only be me and my bride, Mother Earth
I rot, I rot, my corpse is stinking and rotting
I cannot wash myself of myselfEverywhere I go, I follow myself I am free floating without anything to hold me on to the world.My existence lies on the pin of a needle so it hurts me really badly in my ass
>>75496978Uncut clean bwc. Heavenly.
I am going to rot in hell anywayswhat's the point of waiting until I get there
My corpse is being placed into the ground.The soil receives my body.Worms have eaten their way through.
I have to overdose on drugsI have to, I must it is an obligation
dear rotting corpse of a subhuman failure,I am really getting tired of this. Of what? Reminiscing over how you fucked your entire life over. In the span of 5 seconds. I cannot believe you. How could this ever have possibly happened?You ruined everything. You ruined it! RETARD. YOU RUINED IT.
>>75496819It do be as it did you do
dear rotting corpse of a subhuman failure,I see that you still have absolutely no plans for the future.You are going nowhere, very fast.You chose to go nowhere, very fast.Your life is fucking over with.
my corpse STINKS IT REEKSmaybe my corpse should take a showera shower of flesh eating acid would be the most deserved
WAKE ME UP WAKE ME UUUPPPPPPP
I have been doing this for one hour.Please god wake me up this cannot be my life.I have to die immediately if this is true, it just can't be true or I would die immediately of a heart attack.
i'll be waiting for you, m
I can only think about my mother screaming when my body is found.
>>75496417sorry man. guess i'm just feeling solemn and wanted to vent
at least I'm the greatest philosopher of all time
if anyone respected philosophy I would be crowned godnow I have to kill myselfI have to, I have to,I can't wake up please help me wake up
Dear you know who You claimed to love me more than anything, yet you're already over me. you were over your ex of a year a month after him when you met me, and now youre over me no more than 2 months after we're through. i hope the current guy you have doesnt figure out how fickle your love really is. i thought you were the one and i believed your lies. i dont wish evil upon you and hope you live a good life. but you shouldnt have done that.
>>75497197No no, I liked it. It was heartfelt. I'm sorry you're going through that.
>>75497214what are her initials dude. i think 80% of girls reading this could relate to it
With nothing but a heart deflated like a balloonLiving in a world that only considers me a loonStuck living with two parents that I wish I could chewI guess I sentenced myself to my own doomNot even 1pm, still stuck in my head, wishing I was dead, for a chance to sniff some lead, something something nothing I could learn how to make beats, that be some fun shitsomething somethingevery minutes a different feeling of longingsomething fuck I lost the steam Even the urge to shitpost is gone again
>>75497224it's alright. it's been way too long for me to still be coming in here and writing out my feelings about her, but i do it anyways. so you shouldn't feel bad. my life is in limbo right now; i'm basically floating in still water and there's no current to pull me forward. so it's hard to move on when my mind is just trapped in the past. when or if things improve maybe i'll finally get over her. thanks for reading
>>75497227she does not browse this place. i typed that out because i felt like it. if any girls can relate to my post, i want to ask you why? why lie about wanting a future with someone only to get over them in a few weeks? cruel, cruel world. are all women like this?
how can I ever escape this nightmaremy absolute horror-filled clownshow of an excuse for a human lifeI need to beat myself over the head with a fucking brick
NIGHTMAAARRRRREEEEEEEEEEEENIGHTMAAARRRRREEEEEEEEEEEENIGHTMAAARRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEWAKE ME UPPPP
eternal peace lies on the other side of a quick injection of lethal drugs
horror awaits me every waking momentand every sleeping moment when my dreams are invaded by ghosts
FailureLoserClownSubhumanParasiteWormDogReally just not a person that you want to meet or get to know
do people really come in here and spam 50+ posts about random garbage. jesus christ man just use an empty discord server or a text file at this point
Someone has to know how much pain I am in
>>75497358Sorry, it's because I'm here
we have been together for so long, yet you can't do just one basic thing for mewhen did your love end?
good morning faggots
>>75487431Can you tell me what you think I mean by >Love transcends?https://youtu.be/n2RDdr_SEB0?si=iVq_dv2d3KgMptuY
>I honestly don't know what's wrong with meYour head you stupid bitch
>>75498214dont take too much youll get sick
>>75498222just 20mg nice trips
my heart is racing so fun
i didnt consent to having autism my brain is raped
>>75497255maybe you should just listen to /r9k/ and similar when we say women can't feel real love. not even a mother's love is unconditional. the reason people like us are so reviled by the rest of society is because we make people uncomfortable when we pop their stupid fucking bubble and remind them everything's not okay, we actually live in a pretty ruthless fucking world and even your friends and lovers could turn on you. anyway join the club, you're not the only one who has some cunt like this in their life. it's old hat for many of us at this point.
>>75498387unconditional love isnt real. nobody can give or receive unconditional love.
>>75498399Have you met our Lord and Savior, Jesus?
God does love us unconditionally. My heartbreak will end one day and God will still be there for me. and I'll find a woman to spend my life with, or i may not. But I'll always have God.
clayton ray huff
>>75489852Ayo, why is this so eerily relatable?
i should take more adderall
>>75498984rip in peace your heart
>>75497078I'd recommend not dying. Describe this park to me? Is is near a Pavilion?
RPD (Raped personality disorder)
>>75499477Aktually it's called BPD
>>75497539we were never together and it didnt end my apathy just won
>>75499485nta but letter schizos kill me every timenobody is writing for you so clearly you arent as apathetic as you claim to be
ummmm guys this extremely vague post on this anonymous imageboard is totally for me?
how do i say i miss you in a way that will make your heart ache as much as mine does
>>75499500Are you vague posting about me? I'm so insulted you asshole. Pick up your phone.
who cares. pretending like its someone i know makes me feel better maybe
>>75499508what the fuck you caught me
what does he need this for
>>75499526I don't know. Why are you specifically asking me?
>>75499536i guess now i am. so what does he need it for?
>>75499502why would you even miss me at all
>>75499542Probably to play baseball. I don't know why it has two endzones though.
tfw i will never drink hot chocolate by the fireplace with someone i love
>>75499547because i am so in love with you that it takes up every second of my day, and i cant be non-chalant about it because i, miss you!
i want to kill myself every time someone tells me about their relationships
>>75499582kekk you are evil taunting that poor schizo like that
>>75499583My Relationships>Does this make you feel worse or better?
>>75499593this is clearly black peoples fault
>>75499598A non-sequitur if I ever heard one
>>75499588if missing and loving someone is evil then i am evil
>>75499608not at all what i said
>>75499610If by taunting you mean the horrible things I said earlier, it was a burst of hurt and anger. I just don't know what else to do at this point. go to sleep, by the way, it is really late.
i will never have rats before i kill myselfat least i got to take care of that mouse for a day
me eating a meal
im raped because my assburgers are irresistible
i cant be bmi 13 or elsethey will take my medication away and i will ballon up from withdrawals
even if it is you i still dont believe you. youre just saying what you think i want to hear so you can eventually destroy me. i dont want you to destroy me i want you to literally kill me
why they dont like ugly asperger anorexic asexuals
>>75499773if you respond to me and ill explain
i was like bmi 19 when i stopped working and they thought i had an eating disorder normal weight but they would give me food and make me sit and eat it kekk imagine if they saw me now
apple juice mogs orange juice is for incels
people ask me do i have a boyfriend to mock me they think im too subhuman iq to realize they are mocking me
is taking more adderall a bad idea
ill stay up until i hallucinate again
I keep thinking every account is you.I think I'm right. It explains everything. You really are just like me.
>>75500047alright meds right fucking now
i wish i was taller i wish i was 5'7 mmy bmi would be 13
It really does seem like people have been dialing up the crazy on here lately. And it's not even a full moon or anything
bmi 15.5 its over
>>75500074i was bmi 15.2 i fucked it up
>ur virginity ain't that deep, stop trying to share it with someone special and just have sexyeah just be a normalnigger sex pest that lacks the ability to pair-bond
i do not want to have sex with anyone ever. people who treat sex as nothing more than some primal act of lust anger me. and yet people who also treat sex as an expression of their so-called "love" anger me too. all sex is coerced. if you really did love someone, you would not have sex with them. sexual desires are unfortunate and nearly everyone suffers but few are strong enough to overcome them. sex is highly traumatic for all parties involved and is nothing more than a mutual infliction of trauma.
>>75500180Incredibly based and same!! I want to forsake my primal urges in an act of pure love and romance and treat that as the only thing that truly matters.
just searched up one of my old discords in the archives and some nigger posted it and said i am some random alcoholic egirl from indiana i do not even live in the midwest or drink alcohol what is their problem nigger i dont like these schizo types
>>75499797youre not them orginskkkra
i cannot even blame them actually every zoomer retard on 4chan has the same typing style it would be easy for a paranoid fag like that to be confused
imagine getting played by some overweight alcoholic egirl who spams her nudes everywhere and then you still become really obsessed with them thats sad
i would like to meet someone special and devote all of my love to them and i think honestly my entire life too
in a world that values sex over love its over it never even began for me i could not accept any of those people because i do not want to indulge in intercourse despite still being desired by others it is not an accomplishment because i will never be loved if i continue to live i will very very likely be alone in my 30s and 40s until i die of old age being lonely sucks i cannot relate to the way that most people in relationships act they judge me for refusing to partake in sexual hedonism my family teases me and asks if i am a closeted lesbian at the mall my mother got angry at me for ignoring a male that was harassing me in front of her she told me i was being rude and to talk to him i gave him an angry look and walked away from him i will not speak to people like that i will persist through my feelings of loneliness i will have my first and only connection with someone that understands and respects me or i will have nothing
i dont have the energy to reply to the few people that still contact me they will forget about me soon so its alright one person asked me yesterday if they could call with me and if i felt up to calling and i did not respond i dont know why anyone bothers with me i feel like a corpse that is being dragged around everyone will be gone and i will kill myself
i hope you are not planning on starving yourself you messaged me and asked me for advice and when i woke up i was confused i replied in a really stupid manner to your message my brain thought it was a joke i apologize for that do not actually starve yourself
i do not have any friends anymore because i am boring and have no energy my responses are so bad its funny because it seems old acquaintances are trying to reach out to me more lately i hope they will realize i am useless and leave soon i dont really know what happened in the span of a year i dont want to do anything anymore i feel like life has been ripped from me
in barely a year i lost around 40 pounds i went from normal to severely underweight i did not use drugs for this getting an adderall prescription has helped me lose more though i have not worked at all this year i stopped going outside unless i am forced to i barely leave my room i threw away most of my clothes and i have no furniture besides a mattress and a desk for my computer i have almost completely abandoned all of the desires i had i had a lot of ideas on changes i could make that would cause me to feel sincere happiness and long term fulfillment but it seems so pointless now i do not want to pursue anything anymore and i wish i was not scared to die i know i will die that person used to tell me i am wrong and i will not die and i will live a long life and i will put all of this past me but now they tell me they know i will die i wonder if anyone else has noticed my changes i pretend i take the medication and they told the doctor i seem so much happier i still talk about future plans but now my words are empty they sometimes comment on my weight but it is just passive remarks telling me to eat or "stop having an eating disorder" i am told i am skinny enough already but it is not really about being skinny anymore they do not notice anything about me or maybe they do and my parents simply do not care about me to show me the love and attention i have lacked from everyone all of my life
i wanted friends so bad i imagined having a group of friends i imagined just having one really cool friend a best friend because honestly one person would be enough because its more than i have ever had and i pictured myself hanging out and going to cool and fun places i wondered what it would be like to have people that enjoyed being around me not out of pity for the ugly autistic loner not because they wanted something from me but genuinely wanted to know me and spend time with me i have never had a friend in real life i never had the experiences everyone that i see around me has had my sibling is very different from me they are not autistic they were not ostracized they have many friends they go out often people always talked about how cool and fun they are they did not waste their teenage years my parents have occasionally told me throughout the years that i need to make friends sometimes i would walk away after they said this so they would not see me cry it is really embarrassing that they know i am a failure of a human being rotting in my bedroom everyday
it will never get better so i want to make it worse i want to suffer i have immense self hatred because of the way humans have treated me i do not feel like a human i feel like an alien that was put on the planet to be ridiculed i feel like some sort of social experiment i have become bitter and i hate nearly everyone i encounter i will continue to wallow in my own self pity because i realize any steps towards something better is futile
there are people in far worse positions than me people who have lived worse lives i am selfish and i hope i die
i love seeing normalfags argue over who is more of a normalfag when they all qualify as normalfags due to their degeneracy
>>75500792no anon you are the normalfag. and then anonymous was a normalfag.
more adderall...... based
i want to fucking die anonsi want to fucking die soo badly
>>75500802yes i am a normalfag and so are you and the anon reading this
>no YOURE THE NORMALFAG!!!do niggers really? just because you are on 4chan simping over lolicon art and your anime waifus doesnt mean you are not a normalfag most people watch porn and jack it to hentai
>>75500806tell us all about it anon
R U serious i should just get a job in the army?
>>75500844like what, i'm stuck in a hellish fate, be more specific
>>75499502I miss you too, S. I know ____ doesn't treat you right, and when you're ready you can move in with me.
males are obsessed with simping. whether its over women in real life, e-girls on the internet, or a literal drawing, you can be assured that they will simp. they are biologically hardwired to simp and obsess over women. their entire existence revolves around women.
>>75500867yes tell us everything its okay we are here for you anon
>>75500879i don't even know where to begin it, i'm absolute stuck in a hellish fate dude
>>75500884what will you do today
eating fruit isnt going to stop the adderall i just took from raping my heart rate or my blood pressure
>>75500890either cry until i die or kill myself, i already planned multiple methods of killing myself
there is not really a fundamental difference between a guy who simps over his local gym thots and stacy at work and a guy who simps over anime girls and streamers. why do they insist they are better than one another?
>>75500898thats alright i hope it works out for you anon
amphetamines heart attack or i starve to death
>>75500914nothing will work out for me, i'm extremely depressed, suicidal, mentally ill and have severe health issues, i'm killing myself
>>75500922i meant that i hope your suicide plans work out
>>75500921>amphetamines heart attack or i starve to deathlet's fucking go
>>75500924and why is that if i might ask
>>75500939it will be good when everyone is finally free from their suffering
wow i sure hope i do not give myself heart damage or have a heart attack yep for sure
my heart is pounding and i am seeing things that i know are not here im trolling my body
call me george floyd the way i cant breathe right now
what is my brain so anxious about
i'll talk to the drill instructor about joining the army in a few monthsassuming this is not a bad joke of yours
i am so normalfag it hurts
im a normalfag normalnigger hahaha
i am a normalfag and i am proud
>>75500946i wish i was never stuck in a hellish fate worse than death, i wish my life could be better but never will
im shaking but its all in my head
i mixed a stimulant and a benzo now what will it be like
i can barely think its ok
eventually im killing myself you have fun with life though i guess
im so dizzy and my head hurtsi eish i had someone to talk to
>>75501161quick the thread is gonna die soon what's your tag?
ttell me what you want from me
>>75501161why are you dizzy and your head hurtsi also wish i had someone to talk to, but anons from r9k aren't a good ideia to get contactsi have unhealthy balls and i'm mentally ill and i'm schizophrenic
yeah 16:19 can mean so many thingsDon't stopDork stopDork silenceDork stopPlease stopPlease silenceif you've got something to say just say it outright, whoever you are
>>75500556https://vocaroo.com/1mn3lAbt1O0u>>75501471Now what makes you think that?
>>75501378yeah, literally and i'm scared to death over it, i been going to the doctors but the schedules take too long
i need a haircut badly
>>75501599What's wrong with them though
when you see those messages you need to tell me what you want from me
my hair is shoulder length againit has not been longer in years i could let it grow maybe i will
>>75501646there's a lump on it, and i'm scared to death of losing my balls and my health over it
>>75501706you know itt
i already regret the impulsive email i just sent to you. it was selfish of me to complain so distressingly about my problems like that. i doubt you will see this before the thread dies but i apologize and i will try to have better self control in our interactions going forward. i appreciate the fact you have continued to still talk to me although i do not think i am contributing anything.
continuing to interact with you is extremely selfish of me. i do not see what you could possibly gain from talking to me. perhaps i am a spectacle and that is how i benefit. i should stop talking.
>>75500910There is a huge difference. One has excellent tastes. The other is shit.