Loch Tay edition
>>83259633Do you edge when masturbating?
Ahahahahaha mongboy!
>>83259633Hiked Ben lawers a couple years ago was fucking knackered desu. Then checked out the old mine where they filmed monty python and the holy grail.
went to iceland the other day, hands down the most depressing shop ive ever been in.
>>83259667That's where your average single dosser mum shops in. What did you expect?
>>83259653None of your fucking business de lad
might just become a rapper
>>83259684>What did you expect?i dont know honestly
>>83259700what will be your rapper name?
>>83259714Lil' Pampers
>>83259638nah that's very sensible. you want fit, healthy young lads. and it gives them an option that isn't college, work, or dossing.
>>83259633Nice house in scotland next to a loch on Rightmove right now.https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/163925411#/
>>83259743>3,450,000*checks pockets*damn i dont have my wallet on me oh well
>>83259751I can chip in a fiver mate.
if you have 3,000,000 alone you can buyhttps://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/168036503#/>This property has been removed by the agent.shiiit this is new. does that mean it's sold? are we getting Lightwater Valley back?
>>83259778every little helps as the shop says
>>83259743Amazing place but would be brutal in the winter, you'd regularly get stuck up there for days.
>>83259743Nice house but 100% know that place will have utter dogshit internet round those parts.
>>83259796Skylink lad. Everywhere has good internet now.
>>832597433,5 million and the kitchen looks from thr 80s lol
>>83259796they could get Starlink put in, i'm sure.
There could be unhealthy perverts here, he thought.
>>83259493I'm sure girls are itching to get with a shoeless man in his 30s with no job who lives off mummy and spends all day posting about how women won't give him sex.
>me imagining myself in the big fancy houseyep, i'd still be me.
>>83259812im a healthy pervert i do squats
>>83259794Comfy though. Starlink, Helicopter-Deliveryoo (teehee).
big house means lots to clean, rather stay in my 1 bed room hovel
>>83259822Oh rlly? I have just the room for you. Do you like nurses?
>>83259825Yeah you'd chopper all over the place.
>>83259778Unironically why don't we actually do something like this. Like all of us chip in and we get a britfeel house? 3 mill might be a bit much but im sure we can get something for like 1.5mill
>>83259794Most lads here rarely go outside anyway
>>83259820*butler approaches*sir your waifu pillow just arrived what would you like done with it?take it to the goon cave Jeffriesvery good sir
at the britfeel house would we will post in britfeel from our boxrooms? or would we talk in real life instead
>>83259831If you have 3 million plus to spend on a house I'm sure you can afford to hire a few cleaners innit.
>>83259832i like the ones with big wobblers
>>83259667Iceland is trash desuUsed to go there just for the frozen veg and chicken strips when I'm lazy. Not even cheap these days so don't even bother. Most of their food is slop and you can see why kids get fat and unhealthy.
>>83259845We would post from our boxrooms in our britfeel mansion. The main advantage being we could lend each other our vidya.
>>83259851i dont want interact with other people IRL
>>83259853its the cheapest ingrediencies shit out of a factory and put onto a microwaveable tray
Hang noncedadlads nonce dadHang SSMSimpul as
Personally I like Iceland's frozen wizzas and their chicken strips. I'm aware they are slop but they sure are tasty. Their knockoff Mars ice creams ain't bad neither.
>>83259861Hire a butler who will be head of the household admin. He will deal with all that stuff of interacting with cleaners and what not. You'd have to interact with the butler but only as much as you want to. You could tell the butler that he is to only speak to you via text messages. Butlers are there to please you as much as possible.
Perthshire arguably the nicest place in the country desu you often get a lot of yanks in pitlochry for the golf and that. It's a proper nice wee town tho. Cozy highstreet
>>83259852We've loads of them, follow me, and get ready for the time of your life in the pervert annihilation room.*pushes you through the door and swiftly closes it behind you, and pulls the flamethrower leaver*
Notice how all these old buildings are decorated in the style of the period when they were first constructed, some of them look so.... uninviting.https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/167658500#/
>>83259871yeah ok jade goody
>>83259875butler and cleaners? this is getting expensive
>benefit mongs daydreaming about how they would live in a multi million pound mansion
>>83259866Yup exactly this. Happy to say I don't own a microwave. Haven't had a microwave meal since I was a teenager and living with my mum.
>>83259885>benefit mongs daydreaming about how they would live in a multi million pound mansionand?
Me? I'd hire a tall busty woman to be my naked live in maid.
>>83259882A good high class butler who will handle everything for you will set you back about 150k a year. That's nothing if you can afford 3 mill on a house. You'd make 150k from interest alone.
i want to live on the Isle of Man.was talking to some guy on /tv/ who lived there and knew that Beckii Cruel lass growing up. sounds like it's just the England we had 30 years ago. except now there's the internet.
>>83259893I'd round up all the good looking crack heads and shag them in exchange for crack.
>>83259891He's a self made wagie, the distance to him and the unemployed in being able to afford a castle in scotland is practically the same and he's mad about UC euromillions enjoyers fantasising, in case they leapfrog him from a "idiot tax" bet.
>>83259880I think it looks better than modern kitchens etc where everything is just gloss white and no character. See what you mean tho id definitely be giving it a renovation.
>mother watching anti-woke slop podcasts againThey are unironically doing the "you can't even say Merry Christmas anymore, it's been replaced with happy holidays" thingWow 2004 called, it wants it's political correctness back. These "conservative" slopcasters just repeat the same few boring talking points over and over again and boomers think they have heard it for the first time, every time.
>>83259919You take it up the bum you degusting human. I feel sorry for your mum.
Living in a 3.5 million quid house is a genuine option for me on my life trajectory, but I wouldn't want to be saddled with the insane mortgage. Working hard is only fun when you know you could stop any time and still be fine.
>>83259919Fucking embarrassing isn't it. Everyone needs to wise up and tell these people no.
>>83259919did you know kids have to sing 'baa baa rainbow sheep' nowadays?and you can't say 'brainstorming' any more. offensive to epileptics.
>>83259930>Living in a 3.5 million quid house is a genuine option for me on my life trajectoryPull the other one mong.
>>83259924I'm not hating on my mumberg, it just frustrates me the sort of rubbish she watches. Bring back trivial slop I say.>>83259928Even the term "woke" is mad when you think about it. Implication being that all this started in 2015 when the wokey wokers took over, or something. When really we have just had the exact same "conversations" over and over again for decades. People have the memory of a goldfish for reals.
getting bored of regular pornanyone got any recommendations for different porn? nothing illegal please, not into thatjust something new to wank too
>disgusting humanToo scared to use the dreaded f word are we? Lol.
>>83259930Think a house can be too big aswell. Obviously people hire cleaners but I wouldn't want that. I want a bigger house than I currently have but not by THAT much.
can't believe you can't say retard anymore
>>83259945>trivial slopThat's all the leaking from anal sex is to you now.
>>83259944Not every one here is a loser like you lad
>>83259953Ask helper for a link to THAT video.
>>83259962Post bank account mong boy.
>>83259955Yeah exactly there's definitely such a thing as "too much house." You can hire cleaners but it's a bit different having someone come in a few hours a week and having basically a full time housekeeper.
>>83259945yeah, 'woke' has had a tortured life. used earnestly/light-heartedly, then people sarcastically started with, "oh yeah, how 'woke' of them..."and now it's just used in the same fashion we already had 'politically correct' for.very silly.
>>83259953Presumably "regular porn" is the most retarded Americans fantasising about burgers while faking sex.Try retro porn, it's actually erotic. 1970's onward. And the women don't look like the modern version of Katie Price.
>>83259973What's the point? You'd just spit out your dummy and start screeching about "inspect element" etc. Wouldn't matter what proof I post, you'll have an answer. Nah lad, this isn't my first rodeo, the only winning move in the "prove it!" game is not to play.
>>83259954he actually said>degustingmaybe he meant 'degutsing', as in 'de-gutsing'?that sounds like taking it up the bum tbqh.
All I want is a good sized garage for all my tools and a workbench tbqhwy
>>83259986Still waiting for proof mong boy...
>>83259919RW internet anime schizos consistently ten years ahead of the curve at a minimum
>>83259996You dont have any tools
>>83259986Ignore him laddie he's still counting the 5 and 10ps in his savings jar.
>>83259956another one that felt American tbqh. like you'd hop on a game and they'd scream 'dude this fag is so retarded'.we already had words for those words.i say bring back 'poof'. was a good word, that.
All I want is a good sized garage for all my shoes and trainers tbqhwy
Escortlad hereGUESS WHO'S NO LONGER A FUCKING VIRGIN
i posted my bank balance earlier and nobody questioned it.i know it's because nobody cared, but that still INCLUDES 'nobody has any reason to doubt.'
>>83260016>GUESS WHO'S NO LONGER A FUCKING VIRGINNot you.
Even some tools is beyond his reach despite being one himself.
Just got audible trial. Not bad at all desu. Might keep paying for it after.
>>83260006I remember years ago I was living in Copenhagen and mentioned it on here. Had people screeching at me endlessly to prove I'm there. Ended up taking a timestamped photo at the train station. "You're on holiday!" A few weeks later took a timestamped photo of the continental plug socket. "You paid someone in Europe to take that photo!" etc. etc. It's pointless with these lads. You can't prove something to someone if they psychologically can't handle believing it.
>>83260016Shagging an escort doesn't count. You're still a virgin lad.But still nice one, hopefully you'll feel more confident around a real women now and you'll get one to sleep with you without paying her hundreds.
Millionare who cant figure out to take a photo and Escort lad, all at the same time, cohencedence?What mong is this?
>>83260037Why doesn't it count?Cos I had a condom on?
>>83260048I never claimed to be a millionaire lad, I'm not one. If I keep making money at the same rate and my investments keep growing at the same rate, I'll be one in about two years though.
>>83260032>You vill be gullible and enjoy it!Nah. Pull the other one, there's a Jew stealing the stitching...
>>83259953There is a woman on pornhub who takes the massive bad dragon dildos with a fuck machine right past the cervix and everything. Well nice mate.
>>83260016Happy for you lid. >>83260032Lmao. They can't even comprehend that there are people who post here that are not total losers. I suppose it's the eternal cope though. Went to Copenhagen like 10 years ago and had a great time. Would like to go back as an adult tho. Maybe a shout for next year.
>>83260059No you won't little lad.
love how all the high flyers seem to post on britfeel innit
Hoping he gets some money from granny for Christmas so he can buy more games on steam.
>>83260061link pls mucker
>>83260064It's a great city, quality of life is brilliant. Haven't been back for years, should do it next year myself.
>>83260032I can't find any posts like that on desuarchive. Why lie?
no sign of the postie yet.sometimes does later special deliveries on Sundays though.
>>83260016did you fail no nut november or nah?
Hoping he gets some money from sexy sandra for Christmas so he can buy more nappies.
>>83260074same tbqh de lid
>>83260089No post on sundays anon, because can't wear shorts on a church day.
>>83260059I keep meaning to invest more of my money cuz it's just sitting doing fuck all. I'm not savvy in that regards though so would likely leave it to H&L to allocate it.
>>83260093I suppose technically yesBut hey, ejaculating inside a lovely woman my age on the 30th November is a good way to end it
>>83260104Depends on how soon you might need it, but if you're talking over the long term, just put it into an index fund (through an ISA as much as possible) and don't touch it.
Cashing in his piggy bank to buy microwave meals from Iceland.
>>83260114Think she'll see you again?
>>83260121She said she would, yeah. We had a good chat. If she doesn't I'll be disappointed. I'll give it 2 weeks or so.
>>83260116Aye long term would be the goal. Though I need to decide if I'm gunna sell and move next year or not. If not then just pump it all in and forget about it.
>>83260114Tell us everything in detailWhat did her tuppence look likeWhat did she smell likeWhat was she wearing before during and afterDid her arsehole look niceDid you lick her fanny and what did it taste likeWhat did you talk aboutWhat colour was her hairWhat haircut did she haveDoes she like pokemon
>>83260131Yeah definitely decide that before you do anything. Whether you'll need it in 1 year or in 10+ years makes a big difference to the best place to put it.
Oh, yes... cum my lady all on my lady.
>>83260128Think a relationship with her could be on the cards?
>>83260057Because you paid her... she's a prostitute. Would she have shagged you if you met her on a night out? No. As soon as you left she was in shower, removing everything she could of you off her body.Want to test that, massage her asking if shes down to fuck again no cash. If she's attracted yo you she will.You are still a virgin mate.
>>83260132Will later, I'm just smirking to myself atm
Wonder if Cheeka will dress up as a naughty christmas elf and have sex with me
>>83260187Ebin? Where you been my lid.
by the same token, i wouldn't consider it losing your virginity if it was rape (for either party).inb4 hymens, women can break them while horse-riding. there's a good chance your frenulum still hasn't snapped.
I miss ebin. Wonder what hes upto these days.
>>83260151Nah doubt it, although we had a nice chat about art and literature, she's definitely quite intelligent, really nice woman.
Good bread this X
She's in love with me britfeelers x
>>83260204Yeah to be fair lad don't get confused and try to get into a relationship with a hooker
>>83260142Low risk low yields best for long term? I am thinking 10 years 20 years from now desu. >>83260204Art and literature??? Fair enough.
>>83260274Yeah in that case put it into the index. It always goes up over the long term. Average about 7% a year over the last 20 to 30 years.
>>83260293Okay. Appreciate the info lid, cheers.
Had me boiled eggs now necking that chicken shawarma wrap nows. Oh aye x
>>83260204Lad you won't know unless you ask. Ask her out.
The escort actually had an amazing grasp of art and literature. First off, we discussed whether Rothko's late dark canvases represent existential despair or an attempt to dissolve the ego into pure chromatic awareness. But she really impressed me when she said that Stravinsky's Rite of Spring wasn't revolutionary because of rhythm or tonality, but because it destroyed the audience's ontology.
When she was wiping my spunk off her thigh with a wet wipe she said "Do you think Proust's madeleine is a metaphor for lost time or simply proof that the sensory triggers of childhood define the architecture of adult desire?"
I'm so sick of this escortmong shitting up the threads.
How can I be homophobic my bitch is gay
i wish i could go back but didnt bother to fill up the necessary paperwork post brexit becase i had a life in poland back then, i especially miss scottish highlandsif any one of you are currently in aberdeen please get drunk and stab a paki in my stead
>>83260378More creative writing from a bored Glaswegian man
>>83260412Posting from a freezing damp-ridden tenement.
got rpcs3. making my lappy sound like a jet engine and it heats my room x
>>83260415Not bad actually even in the hallway
I have decided in my ultimate wisdom to play with Linux in hyper V
i hate it already but ok
https://www.traditionaladventcalendars.co.uk/all-advent-calendars.html
I didn't get an advent calendar this year. Barely feel Christmassy desu.
some advice for the ladshttps://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cm2w79447vvo
I will probably install debian on my laptop I suppose, its retard proof
Just run barebones arch with archinstall, literally all you need
>>83260673The escort arched her back as I installed my penis into her, it was literally all I needed
Okay it's been like a month since it went down, what actually fucking happened to Britfa.gs? Did the domain expire again?
>>83260415https://www.youtube.com/shorts/gsrzAMeegWc?feature=shareWtf is this
>>83260378You hate everything bro. Get some hobbies.
>>83260863It's because he had a terrible childhood experience with his Uncle Des
>>83260404Will see what I can do for you min.
>>83260548The missus got us the Terry's chocolate orange one. Last year I ate it all one evening when I had a sweet tooth. Kept the doors shut and she had no idea. This year it's getting done proper like
you virgins caused this
gone mental. i've had six (6) senna tablets today. just want this constipation taken care of, while also not giving up opioids.
>>83260895Got to respect the advent calendar my lid. Can't just smash the doors in like some sort of animal. Once per day. People who open them in random order and not numerical are also scary.
>>83260928That image makes it seem like it's women's fault.
>>83260928gammon power
>>83260928I mean we all knew it was a bad idea that would hurt he country. It was just funny innit.
>>83260945i'll be honest Chika lad, i almost bought a Dairy Milk Biscoff advent calendar today because it was reduced to a fiver. and i just wanted to open it for the chocolate.236g chocolate, total. but you know what else is also a fiver atm? big 350g bar of Dairy Milk Biscoff.
think my body has had enough drinking.can't do it anymore, need to stop for my own sanity.
Brexit is glorious it stopped the endless waves of immigrants dead in their tracks.
>tfw voted brexit for teh lulz
>>83260986just looked out my window saw a pack of 6 pakis
i feel like there should be some variety, but it's either just>little Dairy Milk>little Dairy Milk with Biscoffeven the no-brand advent calendars we had as kids (with that shite cheap chocolate), the chocolates were different shapes. there's no novelty or surprise here.
>>83260870>It's because he had a terrible childhood experience with his Uncle DesWhat excites and amuses you about thinking and talking about kids being fucked?
>>83260979It not economical. Biscoff is lush though and I mean lush. Idk what Biscoff even *is* but it's good.
i suppose if there WAS a fun surprise advent calendar, data miners would just leak it all online.
>>83260995you live in the ghetto you waster scum
>>83260459First step quit all drugs
>>83261042maybe if you treated crossy more nicely, he wouldn't be depressed and wouldn't need to take drugs.
Kinda.warming up this new Fortnite season though still don't like the changes to the locker and the tsunami thing. Garn get sorted now and head off out.
>mom reminds you that you were always talking about having kids and being a dad when you were a teenager and asks why you never didt-t-thanks mom.
blankets
parents should have had a second sprog for me to interact with growing up, always wanted a sibling, feel like 2 should be the minimum so youre well rounded and have someone who sort of gets you as they grew up under the same roof.
going to do today's Wordle
>>83259633testdkdkdlslamaaaaaaaaa
>>83261152very cute imho
i am the Wordle king
>>83260986Howling that britfeel thought that was what would actually happen instead of tanking our gdp.
my bitch is gay
I'm hooked on uber eats desu lads. I'm now using it to buy groceries from morrisons. Mental to think I'm living better than some kinds of old age would have.
heterosexuals
>>83261367same lad, although my Uber One thing expires soon. won't be getting it again, the individual items are already marked-up (and then there's the service fee too).dead handy though. does feel like we're comfy pensioners with all these apps.
Yeah you're definitely better off than kings because mohammad drove over with overpriced overprocessed slop
>>83261367So lazy. Just giving jobs to immigrants.
Ruth knows her way around a sausage.
>>83261419I judge people who use these apps desu it feels like the type of people who queue for iphones. Like you just adopt the latest goy toys because it's the thing to do. Cringe.
Hitting Wops from the back and going in extra deep when you cum
>>83261462NPCs basically. They'll always do whatever the current thing is, no thought involved.
>>83261219Now do the german one
Watching the Chelsea v Arsenal game on me IPTV. Will probably order some scran in later or go waccies. Life's better when you don't do your wollocks in on the drink and sniff x
Holy bazingas Abdul just left chicken dippers at my door its like Im really living in le foooture:D
>>83261477Donkey punching wops so her sphincter gets tight as youre balls deep in her ass
>>83261387It's great, I don't have to leave the house at all on a weekend. Proper comfy. Eating a ice lolly now thanks to the delivery cooooor.
>>83261418Go on, post your dinner.
Watching the globohomo team 1 v globohomo team 2 game on me IPTV. Will probably order some slop in later or go slopies. Life's better when you don't do your wollocks in on the drink and sniff x
It's great, I don't have to leave the pod at all. Proper comfy. Eating a cricket now thanks to king Klaus cooooor
Going arse to mouth with Wops x
>>83261477Wops is old news. It's all about Laura. She has excellent taste.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dusad4Sex8s
>Watching the sportsball while having my deadly goyslop delivered to me.I'M GONNA CONSOOOOOOM!
>>83261553She is not fit to slurp the cum from Wops' snatch when I am finished with her
>HE KICKED THE BALL OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD HE KICKED IT AGAIN!
>>83261520You're a Neuralink guinea pig in waiting you actual slop zombie
>>83261553Too many views / subscribers.
>Sam Altkike rolling out ads within cuckGPT soonMight have to delete my account there me
>>83261482got there through a combo of /britfeel/ and kinos
>>83261580She deserves them compared to the fat lazy cow wops.
>>83260132>What did her tuppence look likeQuite nice, clean>What did she smell likeDon't really recall any strong scent, just a soft perfume smell I guess >What was she wearing before during and afterJust casual clothes, >Did her arsehole look niceDidn't see it>Did you lick her fanny and what did it taste likeYeah, tasted clean>What did you talk aboutLiterature, art, sport, Christmas>What colour was her hairNatural dark blonde, same as mine>What haircut did she haveJust a normal medium-long wavy haircut>Does she like pokemonDunno lol, doesn't seem like the gamer type
I asked for a nintendo switch in me pod. Not allowed but when I had 5000 good boy points my trough administrator hooked me up with a twitch stream (with ads) so I can watch high quality podvod(tm) content of my favourite streamers coooooor
>>83261542Right I need this cleared up. Does going arse to mouth mean:A. Taking your dick out of their arse and then putting it in their mouthB. Putting your mouth on their arseAnswers on a postcard please.
oh Hexen was the fantasy Doom gameHaxen was the kino
>>83260016Congrats lad, you've done us proud
>>83261598A. Sounds more like B but it means A.
>you'll never guess what! HE KICKED THE BALL AGAINNNNNNNNNNN
ITT: Shut-in dossers who have no friends and have never seen a fanny except on a computer screen seething at normies eating takeaways and watching football with their pals
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgvhUhh9H5Qtyrant cunts blocking his path
umbongo only bloody put one in their gole hole>gets paid 300 million a month
>>83261596*wides the sprawl waves over to u**splices 1 million credits into ur console*shh anon, i was never here ;-)
>>83261614cor imagine a whole Chika-style blase response about how you don't 'get' football, but it's directed AT Chika (who likes football).
>>83261584Well done lad britfeel bows to you
>>83261607>done us proudWho's "us"? He pulls out his shit gimmick on /brit/ as well depending on who gives him the most attention, often shits up both threads, he's just gone over there now
ITT: Brain-dead slaves who have no free time and have never only seen a fanny who their fat lazy gf seething at free lads calling out their slop meals and slap globohomo shitball
>>83261646the doctors say i have a special brain
>>83261607>>83260064thanks lads <3honestly can't believe I did it, i lasted only a few minutes inside her (she did cowgirl) but who caresbut she was lovely, real natural beauty
>>83261654At least he isn't putting "Escort lad" in the name field anymore
>>83261553She looks a bit like Francis Bourgeois in that thumbnail
>>83261654Wish the sad cunt would start a fucking blog already and fuck off.
>>83261662Did you tell her about virgin status and what were her thoughts on that
>>83261657Shouldn't you be applying for jobs right now, dolemong? Your work coach won't be too happy if you're not!
>>83261682Nope, didn't mention it. Just said I was inexperienced.If I see her again (I really hope I will) then I'll tell her.
>>83261689Full PIP. You should be in bed soon for work, you work for me, you pay my PIP, slave.
Are any of the wagies in the thread experiencing the Sunday scaries yet?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3SELotKPT0https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFgbKqSJegAimagine getting songmogged by your own musical
>>83260324No I'm not that fucking stupid lol
>>83261719All of them, while their fat girlfriends stink up the living room with farts as woke netflix slop plays on the off brand smart tv
>>83261719I am losing the plot a bit desu. NEETs won. I admit it.
By far the best part with the escort was her riding me, then I came while I pulled in her closer to kiss.
this time of night is the worst for poor little wagies
>>83261782Here's an idea cunthttps://wordpress.com/
>>83261782kissing a whore lmao
>>83261702>If I see her again (I really hope I will) then I'll tell her.Mate, are stupid? Don't tell her that wtf. She's a paid whore. Stop falling in love with every whore you meet, christ.
We didn't want to join in with his nonce fantasies We didn't want to join in with his YouTuber drivel We didn't want to play along with his escort make believe He's 'upsetting' the wagies and pwning them What a life
>>83261819Attention seeking cunt knows there's always 2 or 3 gullible mongs he can milk here
>>83261800so what?>>83261808I'm not gonna tell her I love her lol, I'll just say something like>Hey, I should've said last time, but that was actually my first time really having sexI was honest with her about being inexperienced and she accepted thatShe might've been able to tell anyway
>>83261848I want to kick your head in.
Notice how he pretends these posts don't exist while he spins tales to the mong squad lol
Can we bring back the anons dad is a nonce larp again
just got back from my escort, today we had a lively discussion about the works of Thomas Pynchon.yes she's real.
>>83261623He's seething at a guy who has never seen a fanny except on a computer screen ordering takeaway and watching football by himself.
i've never even seen football except on a computer screen
I've only ever seen a takeaway on Instagram
Just got a text from my landlord, he says he wants to come round and have a cuddle. Not sure what to say. Maybe he's just a bit lonely? Bit of a violation of my boundaries though.
>>83261871Coooor what about her fanny escort lad what's a fanny like haha legend corrrrrrr ESCORT LAD! ESCORT LAD! ESCORT LAD!
>>83261909what colour is your landlord de lid? mine is brown so i would kindly refuse that offer
what is more important is to develop the fanny within.
>>83261848You didn't leave the house today like every other day you fat sadsack
>>83261926I'm not fat and I had sex with an escortI did it lad
Was speaking to my dad and telling him about the escort. He says he's proud of me and glad that I went to a prozzie before my urges got out of hand. He says that maybe if he blew off steam with a prozzie he wouldn't have downloaded those images and gotten in the state he's in now.
>>83261929>I had sexno, you masturbated instead of someone.
>>83261922He's black. Well, black and tan.
>>83261939lol get rekt mick.
Ruthmong, auditormong, nightwalkmong routine around half ten, king?
Guys so get this. I SHAGGED the escort :O that's right lads. lol we had a good talk about art and literature too haha isn't that so weird and mental that I said that LOL please comment on this about how mental it is lol thanks. I'm pretty autistic and I don't understand things so yeah please reply to me all night and give me advice on how to be human it's so hard and confusing for me cause I'm proper mental ;-)
Guys I am just off my head like the Joker. Should I tell the escort the Joker is my favourite film? XD
i would love to stay for all the mongs. but i might be going over to a friend's to play games and take pregabalin.PLEASE don't accuse me of LARPing. this is all i have going on in my life ;_;
Landlord now asking me to give him a belly rub
Guys the escort just messaged me. She said "what's your favourite film babe?" I said the Joker with a clown emoji. Think we might have a chance together?
Escortmong's short deformed cock entering an escort's STD riddled fanny
>>83261985don't do it lad. hugs, belly rubs....you just know he's building up to rent increase.
I love sex with escort
i actually went to see the Joker film on a date. in fact, i was the one who DIDN'T pay.
Guys she did a laughing emoji react on my joker message. Holy shit I think she might be the one what do you think?
Guys should I tell the escort about when my arse got done in by Uncle Des?
What was her fanny like
>>83262014Well it reminds me of what my Uncle Des said about my arsehole. He said it was like a tight leather glove full of slugs. That's sort of what her fanny was like.
Been an amazing ride watching the escort lad journey. So happy for you lad. I will be voting for escort lad in the personality of the year poll absolute legend of a geezer bit autistic haha but that's are escort lad.
Imagine the ASMR bints an le Wops :D and the escort doing lezzer sex xD
>tfw you and your Joker date agree to do rounds on the drinks but you're an alcoholic so you have four pints of real ale throughout the film and that's still technically the first round, costing you 0ooo aye.
was cooking up my steak and absent mindedly eating sourdough and hummus and I noticed that I could see into a random flat across from me in the reflection of my tv and there was a young bird in a belly top on her phone, mad that. Dunno if she can see me but thats not comfy that.
Preach to the choir
Guys the escort had sex with another man, I'm in tears. The fucking cheating bitch.
>>83262093corrr maybe you'll be witness to a potential murder and question whether that's really what you saw or if you're just going stir-crazy.
>>83262121imagine if I looked back and shes there staring at me and then her jaw unhinges to a disturbing width then she runs out her door like off junji ito
Do the got sectioned one next big man
What do you make of the late Terry Pratchett?
>>83262140the good news in that scenario is that it's a LOT of evidence in the 'just going stir-crazy' pile.
Told the escort about my night walks and she got me sectioned. Fucking wagie foid bitch. Night walks are for mentally ill men.
>>83262159ive had a nosey, it would appear she is watching some shite on her laptop although she is not visible, she should really clean her flat 2bh looks a bit of a state.
Reckon I might try to get myself properly sectioned lads. Be nicer than being in prison maybe? Have nurses bringing me shit and I can just read books and watch tv. What should I do? Just run about town naked and screaming how I am the reincarnation of Jesus or something? What is the best way to look proper mental and get sectioned in a nice way?
*sips* i remember that lad from here who reckoned they had to section him because he wouldnt stop doing sit ups lel
Made scrambled eggs and avocado on toast. Not the greatest looking meal but it was very tasty. Paprika and black pepper in the eggs, sriracha on top. Tiger bread as toast. Bosh.
Anyone here ever been sectioned before?
>>83262171Love a good night walk I do
>>83262190Of course. Many times
>>83262178Reckon a lot of lads on bennies will try this when their bennies get cut
>>83262187Looks like my dogs dinner.
>>83262208Looks like a sick place tbqh. Would love to be sectioned. What did you do to get sectioned?
>>83262156not a fan. all the ideas sound fun, i've read The Colour of Magic twice over the years and it's just not my thing. maybe this is on me, but i think i was expecting something more like The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. fun comedy prose explaining the wacky fantasy concepts. i didn't actually care about any of the characters or anything that was happening plot-wise.i remember reading some of the '''graphic novel''' as a teenager, during that 00s period when every library got '''graphic novels''' in. never finished the first one, but i remember enjoying it way more in comic form.
>>83262210I'm not great at presentation, what can I say? I'll get there eventually.
>>83262178They'll pump you full of pills that you don't need and will alter your behaviour and take away your emotions.You'll probably find that being locked up and not allowed to leave and having set times for everything is not as enjoyable as you think, but won't be able to leave once you are in there.
>>83262218I have schizophrenia lad
>>83261909You forgot to add your avatar, chika
>>83262222The Colour of Magic was his first, and not particularly strong. Everyone starts with it because they think they have to start with book 1, but they aren't necessarily in order or anything, they're all standalone stories.Discworld is great, Pratchett is a national treasure. I'm glad he died before he could get accused of paedophilia or sexual assault.
>>83262227Maybe not for a bit. How long can they keep you in for if you just tell them that you no longer think you are Jesus anymore?
That's the wizza ordered. Watching a film called Clown in the Cornfield. Yeah, we keeping it womfy tonight x
>>83261719Not yet lid but will keep you updated if my status changes. Tbh only a few weeks til Christmas break so quite looking forward to that. Also the sluts at the Christmas party.
>>83262250Ban evasion. Get his ass
>>83262239> Pratchett is a national treasure. I'm glad he died before he could get accused of paedophilia or sexual assault.Lad it could still happen. Shit about Jimmy Savile did not come out until after he died. Who knows? Maybe Terry had a whole terabyte of illegal filth on his hard drive that his wife discovered then destroyed out of shame. Maybe there are loads of people like that. We just never know.
I wish I was better at cooking.
>>83262233Is it wumfy being sectioned?
>shown around a youth inpatient mental facility when i was 16>comfy rooms>massive library>mostly ED/BPD girls>all NHS-funded>staying was voluntarythey had just filled the last room and put me on a waiting list. either they never got back to us, or my parents never got back to them.really feel like i missed out tbqh.
>>83262187I love scrambled eggs. Always with parmesan for me. Wouldn't put ketchup anywhere near it but to each their own.
>>83262255There are tonnes of classic rock stars, living and dead, who banged young teenagers back in the late 60s and 70s. People didnt care back then and it is not even really that big now. David Bowie, Robert Plant, Jimmy Page. Reckon all the pink Floyd lads fucked a few young uns.
>>83262222I couldn't get into it either. Tried that and the light fantastic I think it was called.
>>83262255>Maybe Terry had a whole terabyte of illegal filth on his hard drive that his wife discovered then destroyed out of shame. maybe he forgot about it.
>>83262277https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Wyman#Personal_lifethis guy is just wandering around. nobody is out for his blood.
>>83262260Depends if I'm sane or not. When you're having an episode it's a very frightening and is essentially like a prison. If not, you just read books, go on your laptop or watch TV in the communal area all day. Get 3 meals a day with snacks in between, activities like smoothie making or spa treatment. Can't complain really. Although depending what you're in for you get checked on a lot and don't have much privacy. Also you can get some complete nutters who are in with you which can be scary. I've been on the other side though. Lock us all away so we don't scare the general public
>>83262255Imagine the grim task of destroying a dead loved one's CP
Escortlad and his escort.
>>83262260I don't understand how you could possibly perceive it to be comfy.Maybe if your homeless or genuinely losing the plot?
>>83262297Man is pushing 90 now. No point. Zoomers who care about age gaps don know who the Rolling Stones were.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8ttAlUXbc0>"The problem isn't AI - The problem is people abusing AI to push slop on us"Made me cop a lill ponder there ngl
There is a lot of weird stuff that gets covered up in institutions tbqh. Makes you think what is hidden. A lot of weird sex stuff.
>>83262320i don't even have CP but i DO have written instructions to destroy my hard drives and data on the event of my death.imagine if in the afterlife you can see what's happening on Earth. James Joyce is up there watching everyone read his fart fetish letters.
>>83262286Forgetfulness is gonna happen to HHL too. Already begun in fact.
Escort lad just wanted to lose virginity so he went out and did it. Happy for you laddie. Few more sessions and youl be a professional shagger in all positions.
>>83262328Roman Polanski is 92, his victim has forgiven him.for some reason people are obsessed. and he will just get arrested if he e.g. ever goes to the U.S.
>>83262344>imagine if in the afterlife you can see what's happening on Earth.Imagine being this thick.
Actually got the cravings for a steak and chicken wrap from the Turks. Probably best to have some toast or something though.
Oh and if you're racist you'll hate psychiatric wards. Almost all the staff are African
>>83262367i said 'imagine', it's in my imagination.i know that in the real afterlife we re-enter the meta-ego.
>>83262356I'm jealous of escortlad actually
>>83262404Your wasting your time with him lid he will never get it.
>>83262385But can you get away with using slurs against them and blame it on being insane?
>>83262404>i know that in the real afterlife we re-enter the meta-ego.
>>83262405>>83262356Not getting enough attention on /brit/?
>>83262415Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy that it upsets you ngl
>>83262411I've heard other patients call them slurs, yes. Even assaulting them a couple of times. One lad got completely naked and attacked one, then ran around the dining area until they caught him and put him in isolation
>>83262441Cor I wouldn't mind going to isolation
I would like to run around naked desu. Feels like it would be freeing.
>>83262441Sounds fucking rough Glad I'm sane tbqh
>>83262440Cope on pal
>>83262445It's shit. They lock you in a room with a shitty plastic mattress and nothing else until you calm down, or sometimes overnight if you did something really bad
>>83262463That's what you think lad lad laddio
>britfeel dossers grand dreams: to be sectioned
>>83262478Sounds pretty fun desu. I like being alone.
>>83262463Lad you're here on a Sunday evening. You aren't sane.
I'm jealous of Escort Lad, and I'll be even more jealous of him when he gets sectioned
god I hate toilington, wfh but I still cba, dont even really do much but I still cba. Not sure why work has to be 5 days a week, bit excessive no? can we not just have a 3 day weekend instead, especially if AI will take over
>>83262485You wouldn't last 10 minutes without the internet big man.
>>83262498I have half days on Fridays. It lush.
>>83262502There's no internet in mental asylums?
>>83262526Not in isolation
>>83262491I'm just a spectator to be honest with ya lid.
>>83262510I use flexi to go around 1, god its so tedious eventhough on paper its not. Will be getting 2 weeks around christmas so its only a bit longer.
I was sectioned twice, not fancying a third desu
Big Lee is back on YouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRsdRHtC4oY
>>83262356>Escort lad just wanted to lose virginity so he went out and did it.>Happy for you laddie. Few more sessions and youl be a professional shagger in all positions.thanks lad <3
>>83262510Same here. Fucking love my half day Fridays.
Sad cunt replying to himself kek
>>83262547fucking podcast channel too, we got it good!
I need a beautiful English lass so I can enter her tuppence
what can you ask for in jail?
Being a bit desperate with ssm gone and hhl off trip.
Have any lads here tried or completed either Torquemada's original Cain's Jawbone literary puzzle or John Finnemore's contemporary sequel? I'm clearing off my coffee table and getting ready to sort the first one's pages. Apparently there are referential easter eggs in the second so I will do them in chronological order even though the second is more lush with picture cyphers on the back of the cards that relate to the text but can also stand alone.Big snows coming in next few days and I'm stocked with supplies enough not to have to go anywhere, going to dive into this murder mystery. Hopefully the power doesn't go out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEKH2eblWBkKino report this X
>>83262662Haven't heard of them desu lass. I rarely venture out of my crime fiction bubble though. Snowed in with a candle burning, a good book and a blanket sounds lush.
Therese Coffey sex arse
>>83262662Got me excited about snow then. Bloody yanks
>>83262642you can ask to go home but i dont think theyd let you LOL
>>83262662what the HELL is a 'literary puzzle'?i have picrel, fun idea. never solved it properly ;_;the author says there's one trve solution in the intro. 40 years later and nobody has found it.
being mistakenly outed as a paedo on facebook
Susan Coffey sex arse
>>83262716Would let her shit on my face
>>83262713>on facebookPEBKAC.
Don't like puzzles much me, always used to look up solutions to the puzzles in tomb raider and prince of Persia and all those sorts of games. Rather do the thing rather than figure it out. Probably because I'm a brainlet, but that's ok.
Quite enjoyed the puzzles in the talos principle 2. Never finished it come to think of it but I had a good time.
They *literally* just need to add a decent fleshlight (butt + vajayjay), a femoid voice module and a pheromone dispenserWe are but one mere iota away from actual sexbots becoming real here bros
Probably just gonna buy loads of drugs on the darkweb. Mate has asked me to get him some ecstasy pills and some coke so that's a good excuse for me to just go hog wild and get a bunch of shit. zero21m doing extra special deals, 5g of k for 20 and 4g of coke for 110. Can't say no at those prices.
>>83262743I 100%ed The Talos Principle and DLC, but I love puzzles.
Nonce hunters turning up at your door and mistakenly outing you as a paedo to thousands of people watching the livestream
Mad how I'm not allowed to have sex. Literally barred from ever experiencing intimacy.
>>83262778No smoke without fire desu
He/she/it was suspended for trying to drink the piss of 13 year olds. Vote GREEN
>>83262747I want my sexbot to resemble a human female with no legs or arms. I want this limbless fuck slave to have an eye patch and one working red eye. Her hair will be white and longer than her torso. She will have built in defecation systems and will care of wiping her pussy and asshole as well as fucking her silly. She will be able to get pregnant after my semen highscore is reached. Her belly will be made of stretchy silicone so she can birth be another fuckbot to inevitably replace her.
>>83262788I had sex this morning, was largely lacklustre. Wouldn't worry about it too much.
>>83262747Just a decent bj device would do
Films that make you hate females
>>83262730i remember Tomb Raider getting tedious with its puzzles. a lot of 'find the five triangles, place them in the right locations to open the door' type shit.might be baby puzzles for babies, but i remember getting stuck somewhere with zero chance of progressing. i still loaded the game up just to dick around in the mansion.
He was suspended for downloading child porn. Vote REFORM
>>83262831lol those aren't puzzles
>>83262662If your power goes out i will come over to keep you warm
>>83262842No he wasn't pathetic tranny nonce defender
>>83262759Did you like blue prince?
>>83262778>Mistakenly
>>83262684These are crime fiction but the pages are out of order. You have to read them and and reassemble them correctly in order to solve the murder(s), however they are very complex and there are red herrings.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cain%27s_Jawbonehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Powys_MathersHis cryptic crosswords are nigh impossible so I don't have my hopes up for completing these either, but it will make for a good winter hobby.>>83262703Will look for Maze next time I go to a proper bookstore to the city. I do have Masquerade, though haven't pulled it out in years. Going to try to look at screens less and attempt to use my brain more instead.
>>83262849i tried to look it up and i fucking swear one of them had a 'combine' mechanic where you had to not just put-square-peg-in-square-hole, but craft the key out of some arrangement of items.googling>combine keys tomb raiderobviously just goes on about remapping controls. and it's all skewed towards the remakes.well, time to watch these 5+ hours longplays and see if i can relive my childhood.
>>83262821What if he actually did it and the film is showing how easy it is to manipulate you into feeling sorry for him desu
im filling up with despair
>>83262877Tomb Raider games are just run and jump adventure games really. The closest it gets to puzzles is figuring out where to go, and maybe pulling switches or pushing blocks around, but it's barely puzzles. Not like an actual puzzle game like The Witness or Talos Principle.
Gay men and women are the backbone of the TR community
liked having the god hammer in tomb raider underworld and sending goons flying
migt kill msehylflife is too hardim always tired and ever do th hting i want to do because of it and nothing to make me not tired works ive tried so much shit over the years just always tfatigued no matter wgar
>>83262899I do believe I would hate them. Just about managed portal because it was fun, actually puzzling puzzles would twist my melon too much.
>>83262875That does sound very interesting though I'm not sure if it would be to my taste. That said I might just pick that up for someone as a Christmas present because I reckon they'd love that. >>83262937Sorry laddie. Hope you can get better.
omd apparently the combining items to make keys feature was added in Tomb Raider 4. i didn't even know there WAS a Tomb Raider 4 for the original PS1, i thought it was just the trilogy.Mario 64 was more fun tbqh. 3D games just don't really work without a joystick.
im going to get greggs tomorrow i reckonhot chocolate and idk what sandwich or roll to getdonut too i reckon
>>83262990greggs has gone to shit, go to a non chain bakery you tool
keep thinking about hairless smooth tranny butt and huge tranny cocks
>>83262975me? used to enjoy a bit of crash team racing back int' day
>>83262996na only other one thats not chain is some shit one where the woman gave me a very burned black cookie coz she got annoyed i paid wiv me card
>>83262937have you tried coffee lad? i reckon it'll be big.
i'll be honest lads. i'm a paedophobe
>>83263010she probably gave you a shit cookie because you look like a little bitch who wouldn't complain
>>83262797Normal for gays and troons>The co-founder of a Surrey LGBTQ+ group has been found guilty of raping a 12-year-old boy he met on Grindr.>Stephen Ireland, 41, was convicted of raping the child in the Addlestone flat he shared with David Sutton, 27, on 19 April 2024.https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx28yj34zgpo
Happy St Andrew's Day to all Scottish lads
>>83263033alri paedophobe lad
>>83262997Same tbqh. More anime futas, though. Just want a smelly neet futa lass to pump my throat full of her smelly seed.
>>83263033does that mean you hate them, like with arachnophobes, or does it mean you're scared of them, like homophobes?
>>83263039its all part of their culture are you a homophobe or something?
choon for de ladshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GzgAijkGN8
>>83263016ye i have it on a iv drip so i can have i always>>83263035yeah not worthc omplaining since its a stressful scene you knowrather just leave and go home then not go backspent hundreds at greggs over the yearscouldve gone to her bakery
>>83263033>i'm a paedophobeOh... I guess I always wondered
>>83263045lushbut not smelly thxbut yeah girls with nice thick cocks
>I'm a girl too :)
me, more into paedophones.>fr fr, i gotta pee doeand i'm there.
drunkanon why are you sad?
>>83263076i am not drunk i am triedno gfno lifeno hope
>>83263055I bet you have spent hundreds in greggs you fat cunt
Pic is another Greens activist lol
>>83262961I had never heard of Torquemada or Cain's Jawbone, just happened upon them in a big book shop last year. Then, like other things I buy because they seem interesting (Moog Theremin), they have sat untouched until I finally feel compelled to dedicate time and effort to them. It's not like my life is going to get any more meaningful or fulfilled socially, so doing ridiculously difficult puzzles alone is on tap for the cold months this year. Maybe I'll dive into that Theremin as well.
>>83263091can you be my gfim lonely
>>83262797>>83263065are you seeking these out?do me a favour and look into that Slender Man girl's...companion from this video Crossy posted:>>83247473 the pronouns and police reports in the video are all over the place. i just want to know the actual story there.
>>83263087Holy cringe These freaks would melt the second anyone confronted them :l
>>83263064>girls>with cocksanon you seem confused
>>83263087these agp autist hon freaks give sexy hsts a bad name since they all get lumped together
>>83263091>not like my life is going to get any more meaningful or fulfilled sociallygrim and true
>>83263091>Moog Thereminthese are cool as hell. LEARN TO PLAY IT (or else)
at least 1 in 3 women have been sexually assaulted95% of sexual assaults are done by a family member or close family friendtypical men.
>>83263137not my problemyou arent owed male protection, foidyou arent owed anythingwoman up
>>83263104They're not hard to find. Pic rel is the father of Green party troon Aimee Challenor/Knight, this happened in the house they shared together https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aimee_Knight
rambunctious bum tickler
poopoo bummingham
uuuuuuuuuuuh is this embers room?
oh hes the best wing commander hes a super wing commander
>>83263084I reckon I've spent hundreds in Greggs over the years.
and whats my pay off? a million pounds of tube steak.
Star Control II: The Ur-Quan Masters
>>83263164What a wrong'un. Mad that we as a society have decided to play into these people's fantasies.
Kek not the best way for your wiki to start off
Just got a text from the escort. She says she's not going to do a group booking with me and another escort. I can't believe it. Group sex is a long-held fantasy of mine. And since meeting the escort I've reconnected with my sexuality. I've realised my fantasies are available to me, not just something I live out through porn. I'm on a sexual adventure and I want the escort to come along with me. I feel frustrated because I want to fulfill my fantasies with the escort, but now she's reluctant. I am insecure. I wonder why the escort wanted to do it with other clients, and not me. Does she find me less sexually attractive? Did she want to please them more. Am I not enough?The escort and I are well matched mentally and physically, apart from on this one thing. I don't want to be consumed by these feelings of jealousy and regret, and I don't want to lose her. But ultimately, we could stop seeing each other because of it, and I need this to work.
no word from mate A. she went for a meal with some normies. i hope she can make friends.but there is also a non-zero chance i'll get a text message way later on about how she became sad about something. right now i am in the Don't Know Zone.
>>83263164typical cov, wish the krauts had finished the job
>My name is Patrick Bateman,>Just got a text from the escort. She says she's not going to do a group booking with me and another escort. I can't believe it. Group sex is a long-held fantasy of mine. And since meeting the escort I've reconnected with my sexuality. I've realised my fantasies are available to me, not just something I live out through porn.>I'm on a sexual adventure and I want the escort to come along with me. I feel frustrated because I want to fulfill my fantasies with the escort, but now she's reluctant. I am insecure. I wonder why the escort wanted to do it with other clients, and not me. Does she find me less sexually attractive? Did she want to please them more. Am I not enough?>The escort and I are well matched mentally and physically, apart from on this one thing. I don't want to be consumed by these feelings of jealousy and regret, and I don't want to lose her. But ultimately, we could stop seeing each other because of it, and I need this to work.
>>83263246normies gonna steal her from youshes moving onmaking new connections and friendshipsyour friendshipp will not be needed if she wont benefitrelationships are transactionalsad but true
>>83263232probs just too early to do stuff like that with youhas to know youre safe and its not a trick or some shit
Twolls are trying to get nonce hunters to show up at SSM's flat. It not right. No wonder he's keeping a low profile.
death to SSM
been pondering all day what it would be like to have an IRL friend group. My only mate, lives in NI and im on mainland, has been a bit cold recently and doesn't even open my messages anymore. I was only on hols with him a few months ago. Only got me mum to fall back on, glad shes got my back x
>>83263232Is this the same escortanon who couldn't get hard the first time?
>>83263268it's a possibility, sadlad. everyone is trying to steal her from me.but i have the drugs. plus we've known each other for almost 20 years at this point. might as well stay pals, seems like a waste otherwise.
>>83263276I'm not sure that's it. She said in her text "You're such a lovely guy, and you make me feel confident, comfortable and secure. That's why I feel I can put these boundaries in place with you but I felt like I had to do it with other clients."
>>83263300>Friendzoned by a prostitute
>>83263293it's some cunt pretending to be me
Few little extra drops of piss came out of my wang and dribbled down my leg
>>83263300Show us the text then bigman
I had a wank in the school toilets once and the cleaning lady came right in after me and cleaned it up, i still smile about that sometimes.
>mystery groceries box gives me two (2) of thesethese are utter shit. i don't normally eat crisps in general, but damn, these are all boring.
>>83263292this is me but my only mate lives a train away but hes got his own friend group who are his ex army mates all about a decade older than me, got mumberg and dadberg but I dont see them very often. Its a bit of a lonesome one.
>>83263283Would make for great content desuWatching fatty get confronted outside and slowly running away to hide in his flat with the lights off and curtains drawn.
>>83263325at least there's no prawn cocktail
>>83263324What was there to clean up? You came on the floor and walls?it sounds gross, toilets are not a nice place
>>83263339true. but these are so bland, i actually feel like i could do with some prawn cocktail offending my taste buds.
>>83263340yeah i spunked all over the floor, fucking buckets
wanked in class many a time in school. never got caught though
anyone fancy a nice suckjob
>>83263360Aroused by the urinals and smell of piss were you?
>>83263365everyone knew but was just too embarrassed to confront you
>>83263375nah i went in with a raging boner, cant remember why tho
looking for fisting buddy in londoncan acom if neededi like to go up to the elbow
>>83263390Probably the sight of the fit girls at school with their tight butts and budding breasts
>>83263164Fake news, some Abdul does the crime and white man gets the blame.
should not have eaten crisps. they have undone the hard work the senna put in.
>>83263328feel you lad, would like to have more friends but I cannot engage in any form of conversation with anyone unless I know them really well so it has always been a big struggle to even get an acquaintance. Maybe this is how the rest of my days will be. Sometimes I get real sad when I think that when my mums gone I've got no one left. grim lad.
This fella has 2 kids and was noncing a 12 year old online. Imagine if your Dad got done by the nonce hunters. Feel bad for his kids.
i dont want friends i just want a nice gf
>>83262662>>83262875Also lads, how does one correctly pronounce "Powys"? Is it "powse"?I know that Spinal Tap's onetime drummer John "Stumpy" Pepys, his last name sounds like "peeps" and that's all I have to go by. I once adopted a bala shark that the fish in his former tank had picked on and nipped at his fins until they became stumpy, and I called him Peppiss because that's how a yank would say it.
>>83263424can tell he is a wrongun just from this one still kek
>>83263433right so you ignore me askin to be my gf
>>83263429girlFRIEND lad, you're doomed, as am I
>>83263433>Also lads, how does one correctly pronounce "Powys"? Is it "powse"?Pow-iss
>>83263424I won't get done by nonce hunters since I'm not a nonce. This is true of most people and not a thing they ever worry about.
>>83263424Those 'nonce hunters' are fucking twats. They setup mentally handicapped with entrapment and don't ever go after grooming gangs.
i've no respect for Welsh or Irish names. someone can be called Reoisyhn and go "hi, my name's Bran."
i always assume nonce hunters are nonces themselves a lot of the timeeveryone hates nonces but dedicating your life to it?reminds me of gaysdont liike gays? me eitherranting about gays constantly and making anti-gay your whole identity? you seem gay
>>83263449try saying that on their nonce hunter faceyB pages kek, you'll also get called a nonce ha ha
girls do not want a fatigued boyfriend.
>>83263433Its bittersweet you being here, i really appreciate you posting here but it seems somehow unfair that i will never hear your voice or grab a coffee with you or something
>>83263449It's entertaining though, which is why I am watching the videos.
>>83263429Same, the fuck would I want friends for? To have mad bants at spoons and discuss the latest wogball match? Fuck off
>>83263463I don't have a boomerbook. I'm not over 50.
>>83263464your arightits so over>>83263468this
>>83263462nah i think if there's an underlying-anything, it's that they've found an acceptable way to play at being vigilantes.
>>83263423>feel you lad, would like to have more friends but I cannot engage in any form of conversation with anyone unless I know them really wellyep, tried it at gigs, doesn't work as everyone already has friends at this point, fucked it really. Would like to go on the pisslingtons with an established group of mates, in my mind it would be a fun time
Corr am stuffed off that takeaways me. Watching a film (The Hitcher) on me Shudder subscription nows.
>>83263478corr sorry la didn't realise I was speaking to a 2000's gimp
Nwoganogadou Ngubu
Anyone got any juicy nonce huntin' vids?
>>83263433Pow-eesy in welsh makes ee sound
>>83263475sounds good, that. don't want any more relationships. yeah sex is great but it's also stressful.
>>83263498All the good ones were taken off youtube. It not right.
got post 500 thread anxiety
>>83263498https://youtu.be/dFhdCXlXs2Q
>>83263498Daddy G is still the greatest ever.
>>83263475Not having friends is a red flag to a women lad. Hate to break it to you
>>83263498https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54JD5TVQ_xU&t=216s
>>83263541And yet every cunt that gets a girlfriend immediately drops their "mates"It's all big fucking pantomime
>>83263534kek, he t'old midget here will have gotten off the hook just from this vid. Nonce hunters doing more harm than good in this specific circumstance
>>83263498https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4hkyi9DmtQ&t=148s
If I had a penny for every time I've seen this same conversation and youtube links about nonce hunters,,,
>>83263581You'd have one penny....
>>83263579larping as a plod ha ha ha, the absolute state of this
>>83263526Yet you refuse to make a thread.Interdasting.
>>83263593got bake anxiety from 77th jtriggers on brit/pol/
>>83263586Much more lad. Same convo and lol
me, i'd have enough pennies to refill my Pokemon: The First Movie popcorn bucket.anyway, do you guys think circumcision is wrong? i do.
Sodomising ASMR girls
>>83263572Either play the part in the pantomime or forever sit in the audience lad.
https://youtu.be/6IAskfbqfaE?si=xT9UGGpoB2ZHtnFdim him he is me
Post-400 lad has died from anxiety. It was on the news
>>83263483Once you get to a certain age, usually late twenties, it's impossible to make new friends.
my main issue is that the nonce hunters don't know how to film properly. i think they actually just use the mics on their phones.Roger Cook would be rolling in his grave.
>>83263475Did you see that Iudicrous display last night?
SEXy sexy sex
Need pussy, send help fast, it's urgent
i am not gay, i repeat i am not gay
how do you neets manage to cope with being neet?
how do wagies cope with being wagies?
>>83263726i get stuck in at work and it makes it not seem that bad
>>83263441Sorry, sometimes I have a hard time keeping up. Trying to cut the pages out of this Cain's Jawbone book so I can begin to read and reassemble them.Sadly, long-distance relationships are too challenging for my emotional nature and predisposition to being a total sperg.>>83263468>>83263479Agreed>>83263444>>83263506Thank you
wouldnt mind getting stuck into ruth
rearranging ruths insides
rearranging yanklasss insides
Enjoy the slop tomorrow wagies!
>>83263798This is the opposite of reality. NEETs are all eating crap, you post it in this thread every day.
>>83263814Show us your packup then bigman
Doctors appointment in the morning. Get to dodge a few hours of work waheyyyy
>>83263732By having money, friends, a loving partner, parents that are proud of them etc.
>>83263798wouldn't mind that wagie meal tbqh. those Gym Kitchen ready meals are decent. wish they weren't so dear.
>>83263874>>83263874peter piper
don't like that edish.
>>83263893you VIL enter ze plastic sex arse national socialism threadund you VIL be happy
non twoll edish please
i also request a less silly edish.of course, if someone else doesn't make one, i'll use the troll thread. but every time this happens, it sets the precedent that it's OK for it to happen again.
>waaa split the thread in half because me no like picturePiss off
I'm going to bed I'll post in the better thread tomorrow if one gets made
>>83263893>>83263937>>83264046>>83264137>>>/lgbt/made a better thread
going to make a thread in 32 minutes.why? 1 December innit.
fuck it, impatientNEW THREAD FOR FELLOW CRYBABIES>>83264210>>83264210>>83264210
