ip ooped a large pooe today

>>85477955
>how are you feeling today?
Despair and loneliness
>do you have anything weighing on your mind?
I think about how I will never find someone in my life and I'm destined to die alone.
>whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?
World of Nercraft

>>85477955
I just got the chinese table I ordered online and one of the screws that lets you adjust the height broke within MINUTES

>>85477967
Nvm I fixed it now. Long live Xi

>>85477955
the weight of despair and loneliness like that other guy
i think about how im not good enough at anything, and how it will be impossible for me to escape this rut
i have like 4000 hours on tf2 (steam will say 8000 ish but that just counts how long the executable is open for)

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>>85477959
nice. amazing even.
>>85477966
>destined to die alone
i think about it often too. theres not really much to do about it other than cry i suppose. some people might just not be fated to feel a certain kind of warmth in their lives. i really hope you can find something else that gives you that kind of warmth. as i really hope i can find something too.
>>85477967
those damn communists can never be trusted
>i fixed it
long live the red legion
>>85478087
>not good enough at anything
do you feel like you're mediocre at most things and can never be just good enough for something to be meaningful? thats how i feel about things. i can mediocre at best but never good at anything. feels like i have no purpose or talent i can follow. im just directionless most of the time.
>4000 hours on tf2
nice, i've got around that number too. do you still play it?

>>85477955
>
Like shit
>
I have a lot of regrets. I hate myself.
>
Counter-strike (2000)

>>85477955
Haii! Good thing I checked the board, I did not expect to find a thread here so early. Wowee, the might be the earliest Taothread ever? What gives?

>how are you feeling today
Actually feeling pretty good, I think because I got news that I have today off from work as well (yesterday was off too) and ever since then I've been happier than usual. It's amazing how something so seemingly insignificant can really make my day. I guess I really do hate work even when I basically have the dream job...

>anything weighing on your miind
Not really, no. I guess I'm not sure what to do about my bike because the rear tire sorta deflated again but not fully so I'm not sure if I should buy a new tube for it or just risk using it like this or try to inflate it more and see if it can hold the higher pressure. For some reason this has been happening a bunch to me lately, I don't know if these tubes I'm buying are garbage or what, but they keep going flat on me. Very frustrating.

Also I finally opened a savings account with a bank the other day, I only had a checking account until now. I guess I'm supposed to move (almost) all of my money in there now but I'm worried that it's somehow gonna become inaccessible or for some reason I won't be able to get it back. Probably a stupid worry but it is a lot of moneys so if I lose it somehow that would really suck...

>life has been though lately
Indeed it seems to have. How are you doing today? Still fine I hope?

>most amount of hours
Probably Unreal Tournament, I reckon I have at least a few thousand hours in it. Wish I tracked it somehow because I like looking at statistics like that. Back when I played VNs I used a program to track the amount of hours on those too and I think it helped with motivation to play them as well, just seeing the number go up. I'd play for like 6 hours a day most days, man I wish I had that kind of stamina now.

>>85477955
i ate mcdonalds and i tried to make some irl friends but i failed sooo :p

>>85478404
Story of my life T_T

>>85478360
its probably just anxiety and low self esteem making me feel like im not good enough. that and indecisiveness, uncertainty
i dont play tf2 as much as i used to.

>>85477955
>tried playing touhou
don't care enough
>tried playing osu
don't care enough
>turn off computer and study japanese
don't care enough
>read my book
don't care enough

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>>85478376
>regrets
do you feel like sharing some? are they the reason why you feel like crap right now?
>Counter-strike
what do you think of cs2? garbage? worth playing?
>>85478397
>What gives?
i just woke up early and i wanted to talk to anons i guess.
>off from work as well
oh that is nice indeed. any specific reason?
>risk using it like this
i think you've learned your lesson on what happens if you fall of a bike, so i wouldnt do it if i were you. you could always bring it to a bike mechanic or something and see what they tell you
>gonna become inaccessible
i really doubt it and besides if it happens you can sue the bank and get a million bucks in return, so its worth
>Still fine I hope?
meh. this morning i felt awful but now im slightly better
>tracked it somehow
you could google if htere's some websites that tracks stats based off usernames and accounts. i know they exist for other games.
>>85478404
that sucks. what burggr did you get? i wish i had a burheger.
>>85478414
we do fear what we dont know after all so it makes sense. that might actuually be the main reason why im so scared and anxious about the future. i have no idea how it will be.
>as much as i used to
oh okay. i haven't played it in almost 6 months and im kind of starting to miss it. i decided to stop as a way to close a chapter of my life but i dont think it actually matters.
>>85478439
relatable

>>85477955
Yo hi Hu Tao anon how are you doing? I'm well, pinched in with my family in order to fix the roof in our house, might take a vacation soon. As for the game with longest hours, it's either New Vegas, Minecraft, Guild Wars 2 or maybe haven and hearth. Can't really play games now.

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>>85477955
>How are you feeling today?
I'm alright. No complaints. Struggling to find a game to get into but that's a good problem to have desu. It means I don't have bigger problems.
>Do you have anything weighing on your mind?
I don't think so. I'm a little worried about my weight but I'm not obese just overweight and intermittent fasting seems like a diet that is working for me.
>Whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?
The highest hour games I have on steam are Vermintide 2: 3127, Europe Universalis IV: 2823, Darktide: 2352, and Total War Warhammer II: 1785. I probably have about 3000 hours in Mount and Blade Warband too but that wasn't on steam so I don't have a tracked number.

>>85478579
>what do you think of cs2?
Better than cs:source but i never mastered it like i did the original gayme. Wanna play?

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>>85478597
hi anone. hope the roof isn't a too bad shape and you can fix it quickly. how did it break? meteorite?
>haven and hearth
oh thats a beautiful game. ive played new vegas a bit too but never finished it sadly. what is guild wars 2 about? never really understood it much.
>>85478612
>It means I don't have bigger problems
yep thats true, i like that mindset desu. although we're really good at making up our own problems nowdays. it just seems like life isn't really as exciting otherwise.
>intermittent fasting seems like a diet
it does work really well indeed, and its better than just straight up fasting all the time. hope your weight loss journey goes okay. whats your favourite food btw?
>Vermintide
>Darktide
nice. based. played those games a lot too. i prefer darktide over the rat game though.
>>85478619
nope dont really like that game myself honestly. just wanted an opinion. i liked surfing in cs source.

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>>85477955
>hai anon
hai anone. rising and grinding early i see
>how are you feeling today?
not bad not bad. cleaned up some trash in my roo, pet my cats a bit (one of 'em was crazy happy about that), and listened to music for most of the day so far. kinda good actually even though im still lazy
>do you have anything weighing on your mind?
wondering when the next time a friend and i will play something or just VC in general. has been almost a year since i heard his voice, i miss it.
>also, whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?
there are some console games i wasted a lot of time on but that was when i was little. out of games that are actually tracked.. leage of legends. went from a toxic top laner to an AP/tank support, how funny. makes me sorta miss the game but i cant run it even if i wanted to now. sigh.. no more swain 1v5's for me anymore..

>>85478709
>has been almost a year since i heard his voice
half a year i mean. almost feels like it though..

>>85478695
The roof was old and needed some repairs. As for Guild Wars 2 it about some evil dragon trying to destroy the world, a few races uniting together in order to destroy them, it got too uninteresting at certain point so I just played the mod where three different servers fight in open war, it was fun for sume time but then it got boring so I stopped. You ever played Haven and Hearth?

>>85478579
>woke up early and i wanted to talk to anons
I see. That's good I guess, maybe I won't fall asleep and miss most of the thread (who am I kidding I am probably still going to).

> any specific reason?
The client I'm assigned to went home with his parents so there's only like one guy there right now, so they don't need me to work. Man, I really needed this break, I feel so happy and lucky to not have to work as much this week. Phewww.

>fall of a bike
Hmm do you think getting a flat tire could result in you falling off? It's never happened to me and I've gotten many flats before. They are usually not instant and even if they are I doubt I'd lose control, especially since it's the rear tire and not the front one... but I guess I should probably take care of it and not take chances. Maybe I should bring it to a bike mechanic but ugh I've never done that so that seems scary and also expensive. I think I'll just get a different brand tube and try that, it seemed to work for the front tire.

>i really doubt it
Hmm I guess I'll try to move all my money into that account then. S-scary.. what if something happens to it... I dunno if I could really sue the bank, I doubt it's that simple. But I guess it'll be earning like $30 per month in interest for free so that's something.

>i felt awful
Uu... so the feeling fine didn't last very long... well I'm glad you're a little better now at least. Wish we could fix you up so you feel fine most of the time... oh yeah, speaking of, in some other thread I think you mentioned you'd be getting checked out again by a psychologist this month? What convinced you to do that? Do you think they'll get you some ADHD meds finally?

>tracks stats
Oh yeah, that's a good idea, there actually is. It's called GameTracker. But it doesn't seem to have logged most of my activity for some reason, I looked up my old usernames but it doesn't have any data for it on the servers I used to play most on. Oh well I guess we'll never know.

>>85478695
>Although we're really good at making up our own problems nowdays.
That's just part of the human condition. Our brains are programmed to always seek out problems. The best thing about being human is our ability to tell our brain "No" and make it act differently.
>Whats your favourite food btw?
Hmmm this is a hard one. I'll get bored of any food eventually. My favorite food is probably some kind of sandwich with cold cut meats, lots of veggies like lettuce, tomato, onion, peppers (banana, jalapeno, red, orange, green), a sauce (honey mustard is my current favorite) and cheese. "A sandwich" is my simple answer.
>Played those games a lot too. I prefer darktide over the rat game though.
I also like Darktide more. It's getting hard to love with how messed up the game is since skitarii release. Grabs and hit detection is absolutely fucked on top of the servers being consistently desynced. Makes for some extremely frustrating moments of "I dodged that!" as you watch your character get sucked into a spawn or mutie grab or trapper net. Or your hp hits 0 because you got shot so much during the desync that you never had an opportunity to see your HP move.

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>>85478709
>early
mhmm. thanks to my cat not lettng me sleep most of the time.
>not bad not bad
thats nice to hear desu. good job on the cleaning. do your cats never annoy you early in the morning becasue they're hungry? mine just goes insane all the time and never shuts up sigh. even though she has an automatic feeder.
>since i heard his voice
i hope you get to play together soon. i've been missing someone too recently.
>leage of legends
huuuh, really? we should play it together sometime. maybe. if you get a way to play. or maybe not, its a terrible game after all. i mostly played top path, or yone. used to play adc a lot aswell, samira is really fun.
>>85478717
>fight in open war
how would that work in an mmo i wonder. i never really thought pvp was engaging in those type of games, mostly just a fuckfest.
>Haven and Hearth
nay, but i used to watch some videos of the game as a kid because i thought it looked really pretty. no clue of how the game actually works lole.
>>85478725
>you falling off?
it depends on how flat it is and what kind of terrain youre on, but not really. hopefully its just the tube though.
>$30 per month
oh. just like that? why dont we have banks that just give us free money every month what the hell?
>What convinced you
no one, the lady told me back in april that they'd call me again in september to check on me. i dont actually think they'll remember to do so. besides im not going back there unless forced to.
>>85478759
>tell our brain "No"
...how do i do that.
>A sandwich
mhm, that seems like so many flavours all at once that you wouldnt even be able to tell them apart. i think the sandwiches we got here are very different as normally they got like 3 things in them and some mayo. i'd like to try subway at least once in my life though.
>"I dodged that!"
yeah i mustve said that a billion times by now. i especially hate when the instant death by gunenr happens. its like i see 1 or two for a second and the next im just fucking dead. how fun.

>>85478814
The open war thing was supposed to work by having player that scout out, who command, group of players that capture point, the way it worked is when two servers were asleep the awake server would take everything, and just repeat that. There were some cool battles but they were rare. Why do you try Haven and Hearth it's free? It does take some real life time but it can be fun when you get into it.

>>85478814
>...how do i do that.
Lol that's the question isn't it? Brains are like instruments. They take years of practice to get good at playing. I'm definitely no expert. Mostly my tactic is to consciously think the thing I want to think when my brain says something mean to me. It says something mean pretty frequently. I've been doing that for about 7 years at this point and my nightmares have gone down a lot and I find it easier to do things like go to work. I still have plenty of problems to work on though.
>mhm, that seems like so many flavours all at once that you wouldnt even be able to tell them apart. i think the sandwiches we got here are very different as normally they got like 3 things in them and some mayo. i'd like to try subway at least once in my life though.
Subway is alright their ingredients aren't great quality. A sandwich loaded with stuff like a Subway sandwich is what I'm talking about though. If you ever get the opportunity try Jersey Mike's. They're the same as Subway except their ingredients are better and they pay their employees better so the sandwiches come out much better too.
>yeah i mustve said that a billion times by now. i especially hate when the instant death by gunenr happens. its like i see 1 or two for a second and the next im just fucking dead. how fun.
Yea that's what I'm talking about. They said they fixed it in like that past two patches but honestly it seems like it keeps getting worse.They must have downgraded their servers to something cheaper. The game legitimately cannot handle Havoc 40. It can't even handle Auric Maelstroms. I've been trying to find another game that fills the first/third person combat void. I used to play Mount and Blade Warband a lot but I played that to death. I tried Bannerlord but even with mods it's just not good enough.

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>>85478814
>thanks to my cat not lettng me sleep most of the time.
owww...
but its probably your fault because cats are literally perfect can never be wrong, sorry :/
>do your cats never annoy you early in the morning becasue they're hungry?
nope. they dont beg for food until i'm up. one of them used to love to come in the mornings to cuddle though. she sorta forgot that that was routine while i was gone for those two months..
>even though she has an automatic feeder.
lmao, devious. maybe she just loves you so much that she wants (you) specifically to feed her and not a soulless machine.
>i've been missing someone too recently.
oof you too.. hoping the same for you anone. may we both get to satisfy our neediness soon..
>we should play it together sometime. maybe. if you get a way to play
i would absolutely accept but i dont have a way to play it at all. they switched their old anti-cheat to vanguard and that thing doesnt work on linux. and even if it did, or if i installed windows again, i wouldnt run it still because of how insane it is. that game doesnt didnt even have a cheater problem wtf..
and vanguard still gets bypassed btw.
>its a terrible game after all
its very good except for the player base and the fake ranking and stuff. i wish i could love it but when a loss makes you lose 20 lp and a win gives ya 10 it just feels like a scam..
>samira is really fun.
yoo 100%. one of my favorite champs in the entire game. i even took her top lane when she released and it worked rlly well.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa dontmake me miss LoL please anone i beg you
tahm kench is also amazing.. and teemo....

did ya at least manage to catch some sleep after feeding your cat? sure hope so..

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>>85478843
that seems like an overly complicated thing, i feel like you can never get that many people to actually cooperate and do something like that. would be cool if it did though. kinda reminds me of clan wars in minecraft servers.
>does take some real life time
soon enough i probably wont have much time left so... besides, id probably get bored after a few days like i do with every game i play nowdays.
>>85478867
>consciously think the thing I want to think
yeah i try to do that too whenever i start going bad spirals but its just so hard... i even say outloud the stuff i want to think to overpower the thoughts but it doesnt always work.
>try Jersey Mike's
*writes it down in the infinite list of places i need to visit*
>first/third person combat void
i think space marine 2 kinda fills it a bit for me, but its not as good and feels janky. it is a shame that almost every good game is made by people that dont actually know hwo to make games. like, they know how to make stuff fun, just not how to make it work. seems the case with a lot of newer games.
>Bannerlord
i wanted to try it but i read some reviews that said it was a russian spyware so i relented
>>85478883
>literally perfect can never be wrong
hmm. right... i wish i had your cats. i think mine must be broken or something.
>just loves you so much
mmmmm no i think shes just really, really dumb.
>thing doesnt work on linux
might be a good thing for your mental health. but do let me know if for whatever insane reason you want to play it. also yeah, i think vanguard is completely useless on league as it just doesnt do anything but bloat your computer. partly a reason why i stopped playing.
>feels like a scam
been there. whats the highest rank you got to? i got to like plat 1 then i stopped.
>tahm kench
No.
>teemo
No.
you're lucky i never got you in my games as an enemy because i probably wouldve cursed at you a lot.
>sleep
no rest for the wicked anon

>>85478991
>yeah i try to do that too whenever i start going bad spirals but its just so hard... i even say outloud the stuff i want to think to overpower the thoughts but it doesnt always work.
It doesn't always work for me either! 7 years of doing it consistently and it's just better than I used to be. But hey better is better!
>*writes it down in the infinite list of places i need to visit*
Jersey Mike's is super good. I'm gonna get their club sub, giant, on rosemary parmesan bread with jalapeno peppers and banana peppers added and replace the mayo with mustard when they open today.
>i think space marine 2 kinda fills it a bit for me, but its not as good and feels janky. it is a shame that almost every good game is made by people that dont actually know hwo to make games. like, they know how to make stuff fun, just not how to make it work. seems the case with a lot of newer games.
Space marine 2 is janky in its own way. I played a bunch on absolute and it just makes me feel like I'm using foam bats on the bugs. The matchmaking issues it has turn me off of it a lot too. Call me racist but I don't like being on PC and playing with console players who are using a controller. It has the option to turn crossplay off but then no one joins the games.
>i wanted to try it but i read some reviews that said it was a russian spyware so i relented
Bannerlord is Turkish it's not Russian. There's no spyware like that on it. I wouldn't really recommend it though. If you wanted to you could get it on steam and play it for an hour and a half then refund it for a demo. Or get it for free but if you're concerned about spyware then the free option is definitely the highest risk of that.

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>>85478991
>i wish i had your cats.
maybe not.. they kinda started puking around in my mother's and brother's room lol. maybe its just karma, who knows
>i think shes just really, really dumb.
ok bro, that's like your opinion or whatever cuz cats can neever be wrong or annoying and stuff
(lol)
>whats the highest rank you got to?
dont wanna say its embarrassing..
although i had multiple people ask me ingame wtf i was doing in those ranks and add me to grind up together. had consistently 25 kda always warded rotated this and that. playing normals for 1.2k hours before getting into ranked might have fucked my mrr..
had a good wr even until the game decided to give me an almost 20 games long losing streak which conveniently stopped once my wr hit exactly 50%, after which LP gains where completely fucked. you know what i dont wanna play that dogshit anymore hmpf
>you're lucky i never got you in my games as an enemy because i probably wouldve cursed at you a lot.
hmm that's kinda what i want from enemy players though. would mean mission accomplished <3
enough about lol though. i now pride myself as a camper in bf4, farming people that are actually playing the game using my beloved DMR and UCAV <3
>no rest for the wicked anon
ough that's rough.. at least that means that you should be able to sleep better this night though, right?

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>>85479006
>better is better!
hm yeah thats true. i hope with time i manage to control my dumb brain better.
>banana peppers
i didnt even know those existed. and parmesan bread? like, bread made with parmesan cheese? sounds nice. other than subway i'd like to go to olive garden to taste the difference between their italian food and actual italian food
>I'm using foam bats
yeah i kinda get that feeling too and its the main reason why i dont like it so much, i hate spongy enemies and if the increased difficulty of a game is mostly just "more hp more dmg" then its not really fun.
>PC and playing with console
yeah i get that and thats why i turn off crossplay every time there's an option to do so.
>is Turkish
yeah i confused it for another similar game that had banner in the name too, and that one was russian. i like rts games tho and stronghold crusader is the best one ever. i will never stop shilling that game.
>>85479039
>around in my mother's and brother's room
oh lol. well at least its not yours. mine has never puked much, and when she does, its in my living room anyhow
>its embarrassing
oh cmon im not gonna say anything. im pisslow too anyhow. besides you're saying you had that high of a kda then it means you're not bad.
>20 games long losing streak
oof. i think i'd stop playing too after that. i meeean at some point you kinda just stop caring that much and play for the sake of playing and doing stupid shit. i do that often.
>kinda what i want from enemy players
you are evil in your core anon. but at least you didnt play ranged top so its okay.
>myself as a camper
im sure you'd like cs2 then. that game is all about standing still in the same place for 30 minutes.
>should be able to sleep better this night
i reaaally hope so. im gonna need to go refill my sleeping pills soon and i kinda dread that.

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>>85479081
>oh cmon im not gonna say anything
ppl made fun of it so i dont wanna say, sorry. you can show them all the stats and clips you want but then they laugh.. i dont want to talk about lol anymore..
>stop caring that much and play for the sake of playing and doing stupid shit
also used to that with friends. do you know how much fun support shen is lmao. but no, after seeing how blatantly the ranking forces you into rankings it thinks will keep you playing the longest i couldnt. stopped playing rank and played normals on and off again but it just died out. any game with a ranking system just seems like a bad idea now. sorry i thought i said i didnt talka bout it aaaaaaaaaaa
>you are evil in your core anon
you know.. maybe it was just all about wanting to be called a faggot
dont ask me
not evil though
i think..
>but at least you didnt play ranged top so its okay.
i did that too anon did you forget me mentioning teemo? i was was a teemo toplane onetrick for the longest time. full ap. wait for them to go into mushrooms. pop out of stealth. blind them and kill them on the spot..
i did this so often.. even grinded for his prestige skin. got almost all his for free even. then there's also twitch. i love him too.. omg and then there's singed.. and and sorry i thought i didnt want t-arghhhhhhhhhhh
>im sure you'd like cs2 then
used to like cs:go but i didnt camp. kinda liked the battle royale mode even cuz of how dynamic it was.
>and i kinda dread that
why's that? also do you have a refill system like in the states or how does it what over at your place?

quinn was also pretty cool btw

no i mean 3 kda not 25 im retarded.

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25 was like.. i forgot actually fuck

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swain.. love him so much..

>>85479081
>hm yeah thats true. i hope with time i manage to control my dumb brain better.
I believe! It just takes practice.
>i didnt even know those existed. and parmesan bread? like, bread made with parmesan cheese? sounds nice. other than subway i'd like to go to olive garden to taste the difference between their italian food and actual italian food
Yes! It's bread with rosemary and parmesan cheese baked into it. It's so good. Olive Garden is to Italian food what Taco Bell is to Mexican food.
>yeah i kinda get that feeling too and its the main reason why i dont like it so much, i hate spongy enemies and if the increased difficulty of a game is mostly just "more hp more dmg" then its not really fun.
Everyone does it too it's so annoying. Spawn more enemies don't make them harder to kill. It's literally the SWARM engine! Come on!
>yeah i get that and thats why i turn off crossplay every time there's an option to do so.
Based
>i like rts games tho and stronghold crusader is the best one ever. i will never stop shilling that game.
Stronghold Crusader was fun. You might like Bannerlord. A lot of people do. 35,000 people on steam playing it right now on a Wednesday morning.

>hai anon. how are you feeling today?

Hello. A little tense, is all. Hope you're also doing well.

>do you have anything weighing on your mind?

I turned twenty a few days ago. For most of the past decade, I've a hopelessly online moron who's misused his parents' freedom of internet access.

I've screwed up a lot of my life with porn and excessive social media and I've decided to turn things around now that I'm out of the teenage years.

There's so many things I have to do, It's a little overwhelming but I'm trying to pull through. I'm going to make things right, no matter what it takes.

>whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?

Team Fortress 2. I believe I've logged around 150-something hours total on my current Steam account. Plus around 220 hours on my old Steam account.

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>>85477955
i've been a wreck lately and having lots of panic attacks but i managed to get outside and skateboard last night so i feel pretty gud atm
>whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?
tetris

>>85477955
Who is this adorable character?

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>>85479433
It's Hu Tao from Genshin impact

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>>85479119
>ppl made fun of it
i see... i mean its just a rank in a game but alright. i apologize for sending you back in the league rabbit hole.
>seems like a bad idea
i mean i dont dislike some competitiveness in my games but when it becomes the only reason to play its not really fun anymore. i dont like how every game has a competitive thing to it nowdays it sucks the fun out of playing.
>was just all about
well... everyone has their own thing i guess...
>a teemo toplane
well he's the only ranged one that has been universally accepted (and quinn i guess) so he's fine. i just dont like him much. or quinn. i mean they're easy to deal with when i play panth tho
>battle royale mode
i think i played that twice and hated it greatly. doesnt fit very well into the game i think. was an nteresting take on the genre though.
>how does it what
i just have to go to the doctor and ask for another piece of paper and he gives me it and i get my meds
>>85479215
>baked into it
that does seem really yummy indeed. i do like bread with potatoes in it thats great aswell desu
>Taco Bell is to Mexican food.
so... not great i guess?
>You might like Bannerlord
guess ill check it out then. thanks for the suggestion. i havent been playing many rts games lately. or games at all desu.
>>85479296
>I've a hopelessly online moron
well get ready for another twenty anon. remember, you're here forever.
>so many things I have to do
well, everyone has to start somewhere so, be sure to start small and not overdo things. progress isn't linear either, remember that.
>150-something hours
rookie numbers. you gotta step it up to at least 3000. great game to spend 3k hours on though.
>>85479330
mhm, i hope you dont get any more panic attacks. i know how bad they can be.
>skateboard
badass. wish i learned to go on one. how long have you been skateboarding?
>tetris
based
>>85479433
who tao?

>>85478814
Yup, fell asleep. I guess 6 hours of Darktide just made me way too tired to stay awake. Don't you get tired playing all that DOTA? How the hell do you have the stamina for it...

>how flat it is and what kind of terrain youre on
I guess. I suppose if it deflated almost instantly and I was like, mid-turn or something, that might be bad. I do hope I don't have to replace the whole tire cause those are expensive for some reason.

>just like that
Yes indeed, I mean you are basically letting the bank use your money so they pay you for it. Don't you have that too? I'm pretty sure you do, maybe not $30 per month but at least $3 or something. You just don't have any savings because you're always broke so you wouldn't know. The poor stay poor, the rich get richer.

>they'd call me again in september
Hm I see, I do indeed have my doubts they will remember to call you. Which is unfortunate because at least there's hope a psychologist could help with your problems, without that I'm not sure what recourse there is left. Do you have any kind of record that you were hospitalized for trying to kill yourself? Maybe that would convince them to give you drugs.

Also my headphones are cutting in and out all of a sudden... I think the cable has gone bad. Dammit why must things break. Hopefully I can get a replacement cable for them and that fixes it. What headphones does Anon have? I imagine you must have good ones since you're into music.

>>85479602
>that does seem really yummy indeed. i do like bread with potatoes in it thats great aswell desu
It's my favorite kind of bread it's so good
>so... not great i guess?
It's fine. Mid. Not bad. 5/10.
>guess ill check it out then. thanks for the suggestion. i havent been playing many rts games lately. or games at all desu.
The Old Realms (Warhammer Fantasy) mod for Bannerlord is good. I actually had fun with it despite me not liking Bannerlord itself.

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>>85477955
Suprisingly okay. I've finally realized that death is not a viable answer, because it could be much much worse than life. Knowing that there's no way out, no matter how miserable I get, makes it easier to accept reality and act on it. So long as life is still tolerable, it's worth not rolling the dice and dying.

It has made me think differently about the people around me. We're stuck here together. There is no reasonable way to escape. As awful as we are to eachother, that's how it is. There is no alternative choice of people to be with.

My intelligence is limited, but it's the only one I have. I will see illusions as reality and reality as illusions. I will forget. I will not see patterns. I will continue to be autistic. I will continue to have stupid human biases and lustful, selfish, greedy, rage-filled thoughts. But this is what I will deal with. There's no alternative mind for me to have.

My body is vulnerable to all sorts of ailments. It is conventionally short and has penis that's on the smaller side conventionally speaking. It ages and gets worse every year. But this is how it is. I do not occupy any other body.

In this world, there's hardly anything worth hoping for. But that thought doesn't make the world come to a standstill. It's fucked up. There's no way to win. There's no option to not lose. So, I'd better get started.

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>>85479646
>Don't you get tired
yes. very. but the alternative is laying in bed either crying or thinking awful things. i dont have the stamina i just ignore the tiredness.
>Don't you have that too?
i dunno ive never heard that. are you just never allowed to use that money after you deposite it or something? whats the catch?
>you're always broke
well thanks, im trying my best over here...
>what recourse there is left
nothing. there is nothing. i just have to endure.
>headphones
i got a pair of sennheiser hd 599. have had them for 2 years and they're kinda starting to give out now. not functionality wise, just the pads detaching and the cable kinda getting ruined. might have to change them soon.
>>85479666
nice satanic trips
>favorite kind of bread
im not sure if i have a favorite bread as i really like bread in general. its like one of my favorite foods. i'd only eat bread of various types if i could.
>Warhammer Fantasy
mhm, i like warhammer so ill keep that one in mind. im more into the 40k universe though. im kinda looking forward to the new total war they're making based off 40k.
>>85479676
i can only wish some day i can reach your amount of englightment and accept life as it is. until then, godspeed to you anon.

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>>85479715
>mhm, i like warhammer so ill keep that one in mind. im more into the 40k universe though. im kinda looking forward to the new total war they're making based off 40k.
I really really really hope CA doesn't fuck up Total War 40k. I want to like it so bad but they haven't made anything I thought was good in 5 years. I am tentatively holding out hope.
>im not sure if i have a favorite bread as i really like bread in general. its like one of my favorite foods. i'd only eat bread of various types if i could.
I love bread so much it's a problem lol. I can eat like 5000 calories of it a day no problem and get mega fat. I got my Jersey Mike's sandwich. Pic related.

>>85479715
>alternative is
I see... I suppose that is indeed not a great alternative. Well I'm amazed you can just push through the tiredness like that, I don't think I could do it. Also surprised you don't fall asleep instantly after all that in the evening, and need sleeping pills. I would drop dead after so many hours of DOTA.

>never allowed to use
I think there's stuff like that too which gets you even higher rates, but this is just called a high-yield savings account, so you can use it like a normal savings account I think. I don't think there's a catch unless I'm missing something. Though there are maybe some limits on how often you can take money out of it but it's not anything too restrictive. Basically free money, that's why I should have made one ages ago really but I was too scared. See, in capitalism, if you can make money just from having money... pretty ridiculous really.

>trying my best
One day... one day you won't be broke anymore...

>there is nothing.
That's so hopeless though. How do you even handle that? I'm pretty sure I would kill myself if I was convinced there's no getting better and I just had to learn to live with it. Don't you think there's something that can be done? Maybe it's just wishful thinking but surely, like most problems, yours aren't totally unsolvable either. There must be a solution, we just have to find it.

>sennheiser hd 599
Ah nice, I figured you'd have some brand name ones. I used to have a pair of Sennheisers too but right now I have the Audiotechnica ATH-M40x. Had them for close to 10 years now I think so perhaps it's about time for the cable to give out. The pads are... worn, let's just say. Do you bring them with you to places or do you have another pair for that? I assume you just have earbuds for when you're listening to stuff on your phone.

Also Koishi or whoever that Anon is that posted Norma and then that other girl really isn't gonna post here anymore huh... sad.

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>>85479825
>tentatively holding out hope
ive seen some beta gameplay and it seems decent for now. im really gonna be impressed if they manage to make it work and not run at 30 fps on systems that dont have a nasa gpu or cpu. it seems like with the amount of stuff in it you're gonna need top of the line stuff to just play it properly.
>like 5000 calories
how... i think i'd die if i ate that much... i need to eat more but i dont care enough to do that either.
>pic
nice. does look quite tasty. im not sure id be able to eat all of it though, sadly. just half of it could last me a day.
>>85479886
>fall asleep instantly
god i wish. but with the headache i get its hard to do that.
>Basically free money
mhm, well isn't that nice? you should give some to charity. for poor people (like me)
>you won't be broke anymore
yes, probably once im dead i wont have to worry about being broke anymore.
>something that can be done?
honestly? no. i gaslight myself everyday to believe that there's so i dont jump off the window right here and there. and once ill take care of a few things, i wont have any reason to gaslight myself anymore and thats when i'll be done with it.
>another pair for that?
ive got both earbuds and a pair of samsung WH-something and i usually use those for long travels. theyre noise cancelling.
>really isn't gonna post here anymore
yeah... it sucks. i hope i didnt hurt him. maybe i couldve handled things better. i dont know. i always fuck up everything with people.

>>85480039
>ive seen some beta gameplay and it seems decent for now. im really gonna be impressed if they manage to make it work and not run at 30 fps on systems that dont have a nasa gpu or cpu. it seems like with the amount of stuff in it you're gonna need top of the line stuff to just play it properly.
It being made for consoles as well as PC really makes me nervous. It'll run fine probably on PC because of that at least. Expect ALL of the frame gen and AI upscaling though. I expect you will need the best shit to run it at 60fps 1080p native.
>how... i think i'd die if i ate that much... i need to eat more but i dont care enough to do that either.
Idk I've just always been able to put down food. I can eat and eat and eat and eat. There's a reason I'm overweight lol. At least I'm not obese though. It makes dieting really hard for me. I'll do things like I did yesterday which is eat a whole rack of ribs for a meal and then I look up how many calories it was and it was like 3100...
>nice. does look quite tasty. im not sure id be able to eat all of it though, sadly. just half of it could last me a day.
It is tasty! I can eat this as a meal but I'm holding myself back and only ate a quarter of it.

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>>85480144
>for consoles
i wonder how the hell that will work on a console.
>frame gen and AI upscaling
i mean, thats just the standard nowdays. what can you do. why optimize a game when you can just slap a framegen in it and call it a day.
>which is eat a whole rack of ribs
well im sure grandmas everywhere in the world would love to have you as a grandson desu. do you ever cook food for yourself? or mostly just buy already cooked stuff?
>ate a quarter of it
good job desu. remember you are dieting after all!

>>85480285
>i wonder how the hell that will work on a console.
Idk. Poorly probably.
>i mean, thats just the standard nowdays. what can you do. why optimize a game when you can just slap a framegen in it and call it a day.
I hate it soooooo much. The games don't even look better imo they just run worse and have smeary fake frames covered in artifacts.
>well im sure grandmas everywhere in the world would love to have you as a grandson desu. do you ever cook food for yourself? or mostly just buy already cooked stuff?
lol thanks. I cook for myself yea. Those ribs I mentioned I made myself.
>good job desu. remember you are dieting after all!
Thanks. Intermittent fasting like I mentioned before is so far the only thing that works for me. Idk why I struggle so hard to eat in moderation. I just have to not eat for a couple days every week to lose weight.

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>>85480350
>don't even look better
yeah they never do. its just a cheap way to mitigate bad practices. i used to like lossless scaling but it kinda fucks up the looks and the feel of the game too.
>I made myself.
oh, well then i think you probably deserve to eat all of them, its not easy work. it does feel more rewarding to eat the food you make also i think.
>to eat in moderation
well it must have to do with your habits and possibly psychology. maybe you eat because its your way to cope with things. other people do other stuff like drinking.

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>>85477955
haiiii hutaonon, hope everythings going okay.
>how are you feeling today?
pretty good i guess, better than other days. i felt anxious in the morning and afternoon but right now im staying up listening to kraftwerk's computer world on vinyl. pretty comfy :)
>do you have anything weighing on your mind?
not really.. just the typical existential questions on how shallow of a person i am.
>whats the game you think you got the most amount of hours on?
dunno, i guess tf2

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>>85481833
hi hi. im fine i suppose, just melancholic.
>better than other days
humu, thats nice to hear. has something good happened recently? i always feel anxious in the mornings and evenings. knowing i have to exist for another day makes me anxious.
>on vinyl
very nice desu
>typical existential questions
mhm, im familiar with those. any in particular that you have a hard time dealing with?
>i guess tf2
many anons seem to be tf2 players. we should open a r9k tf2 server or something.

>>85480695
>yeah they never do. its just a cheap way to mitigate bad practices. i used to like lossless scaling but it kinda fucks up the looks and the feel of the game too.
Praying for the AAA industry to fail so that passion projects can take center stage again... Who am I kidding? GTA 6 is gonna be the best selling game of all time and make billions of dollars the industry is only gonna get worse.
>it does feel more rewarding to eat the food you make also i think.
It does! Cooking is a fun hobby but unfortunately comes with the side effect of eating.
>well it must have to do with your habits and possibly psychology. maybe you eat because its your way to cope with things. other people do other stuff like drinking.
Oh it definitely is. I used to be a drug addict. Mostly weed but did hallucinogenics like LSD and mushrooms too. I started eating a lot more after quitting drugs. 1 year sober is this November! I ironically was at my skinniest and a nice healthy BMI because of weed. I'd just smoke instead of eating.

>>85481954
>just melancholic.
ahh, i know that feeling all too well.
>has something good happened recently?
not really no, but some days im completely careless about everything. i've been called schizoid by multiple people but i've never sought out a diagnosis.
>any in particular that you have a hard time dealing with?
not really, i've become careless and have no career prospects whatsoever. its ironic because i know my parents wont tolerate me for long, as they plan on making me get a job in a year or two. its all too tiring.
>we should open a r9k tf2 server or something.
hmm, perhaps we could organize in some way. i dont know shit about running a server so its out of the question.

Guys listen
I'm glad you're all still here
I'm out of my mind on drugs at the moment
But this thread is A++

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>>85482328
What kind of drugs are you out of your mind on?

>>85480039
Lied down and fell asleep AGAIN. Why am I such a sleepyboi...

>headache
Quite frustrating how the one thing you want to do when you have a headache is sleep, yet it's the hardest thing to do. I used to get headaches pretty often, I think it was from drinking too much water or something? But nowadays it's not too common for me thankfully.

>you should give some to charity.
Nah. I'm too selfish. I gotta hoard it all for when I'm a NEET!

>probably once im dead
Surely once you have a job you won't be broke anymore. Or do they pay so little over there that even then you won't have much money? I guess if you move out you might barely make ends meet but until then you'll surely be flush with cash.

>honestly? no
Well I don't believe that! There must be something we can do. I don't think it's gaslighting yourself, but call it whatever you want I suppose. Hopefully you can figure something out before you are done with those things you have to take care of... which are...??

>theyre noise cancelling
Oooh nifty! How effective is that stuff anyways? If you're in a crowded place, can you still hear people talking or does it block it out?

>maybe i couldve handled things better.
Nah, I think you handled everything well. I don't think there's anything else you could have done, it's just an unfortunate situation. His posting was bretty comfy so it is a shame...

I was so happy the other day because i went out with a girl, i don't expect anything romantic with her since i think it may be over in that area for me, but you can not begin to comprehend how happy i was because of her friendship, just chatting, i told her some stories of the houses of the neighbourhood, or the first thing that came in to my mind, and she talked about stuff and i was just happy listening. Im never so comfy around people, but it was different. Yesterday i texted her about some goofy shit and she didn't responde, i guess she realized what i am and decided to stop wasting her time, of course she is right, but it still sucks.
If in the next years things don't change, and they won't, i'll start smoking, maybe that way i'll suffer for less years.