This thread is for people who feel completely burnt out on dating. Feel free to share stories and observations about why dating is as bad as it is currently. It feels so fucking hopeless lately. I'm tired of putting so much effort in just to get nothing in return. I don't feel like I'm asking for much, I just want someone I can spend time with
I dated a bipolar femboy/mtf I found on /soc/. He was a mess. Cheated on me, was a complete mental mess. Freaked out about the slightest things and always compared me to his exGF. I still love the dumb whore but realized I needed to move on. He didn't want to fix his issues and no matter much I loved him he was always going to be a mess until he decides he wants to unfuck his life.Ironically I met my current GF through him. Gave up on him and started to date her. She's been the best thing that ever happened to me. Just don't give up, anon. You'll find someone, it just might not be who you think it's going to be, also forcing a relationship always ends in pain. Good luck and keep your chin up.
>>30349541I have just put less effort in. Propose a date and then let them act.
>>30349570Was their name mokujo / Tyler?
>>30349541>Feel free to share storiesI could fill this thread to bump limit, but I'm too lazy to greentext it.>observations about why dating is as bad as it is currently.Women have too many options. Simps and paypigs are enabling this. Society provides no incentives to act otherwise.>It feels so fucking hopeless lately.The way out is through.>I don't feel like I'm asking for muchI'm asking for a lot; however, I'm not in a position to have to settle either.
>>30349596Nah, it was Luis and they still post in the Cali/femboy/diaper threads.
i have been in relationship for 4 years, 2 of which we live together. we had some serious hardships including her getting cancer. i stood at her side all the time, coverd her financially aswell as emotionally.now since she feels better the relationship crumbles, she seems no longer interrested in me.i gonna be honest, i feel used and not really capable of starting another relationship again.
>>30349570>tranny>mentally illIn other news, water is wet.
>>30349541>I just want someone I can spend time withYou mean like... a friend?
tech companies have inadvertently trained the population to become incredibly flaky and non commital. Things were better when we all had less options and more reason to be closer to the people around us. The answer is to tell everyone you know just how bad these apps are for human well being and try to spread the word about ditching dating apps and hopefully social media too. Good luck op, I'm currently figuring out how to get into romance without the internet.
ive had horrific expereinces but the truth is all women are the same. after my 2nd i've realised all vags are the same. women dont love men. i got a girl who send me pics of her cumming and twatting herself off i was suppost to meet her. she suddenly ghosted me. given what i know about women i just straight up asked her if she found someone else. at least she respondedshe literally waited 3 days and couldn't wait one hour to meet up with me. i had just finished my shower when she replied. i genuinely dont understand why i'd want a woman. my boss for ages used to keep asking why i dont have a gf and why i am not getting one.
Had 3 wonderful relationships with women I genuinely loved and envisioned a future with. However, my mental health crashes in episodes. At one point in the relationships my brain just went bonkers and it ruined everything, I didn't even have it in me to hold conversations. I ended all of the relationships because of it because I just didn't have it in me to "fake" loving these people. And so, after having hurt both myself and these people I've come to the conclusion that I just can't fall in love until I've figured out what's wrong with me, I am seeing both a psychologist and a psychiatrist, but they say my case is quite complicated and might end up taking a while
>>30349541my ex lid to me about his entire character to perfectly craft a persona for me to fall in love with for the sole purpose of getting me psychologically attached to him so hed use it as an oppritunity to simotaneously abuse and shittest me and because i viewed him as the perfect partner, i wouldn't break up with him and thus tolerate the abuse which i didnt by the way, i left himi notice the pattern is common among men who approach women.seems like all the nice, normal guys r too shy to approach girls. its always these fucking manipulative psychopaths. i was heart broken because it was hard for me to understand how someone could seemingly act so loving and genuine yet be abusive. obviously the answer is he never loved or cared about me, it was all a larp. but regardless, insincerity is honestly the worst thing ever in relationships. if you hate me in actuality why the fuck would you waste soo much time faking love? just for the sole purpose of entrapping me in an abusive relationship?i hate psychopaths. im still heartbroken, not over him, but over the false hope he gave me. i thought hed be the guy to pull me out of my shit life with my shit parents and i could marry him and live with him like he proposed but NoooooooooOOOOOOOO he had to be an insincere, manipulative, psychopath.
>have bf>open relationship (we met in a polygamous cult)>he goes on SSRIs, becomes asexual>I get a new job and we move cross-country, I don't know anyone here>no one on okcupid has a personality beyond game of thrones and politics>no one on tinder even has a bio>give up>become volcel til I move>never even go outside because I don't think I could stand anyone here
>>30349541I was with my ex for a year and a half. In that time she'd tell me how much she loved me and how she'd marry me if I only asked. Well she moved a couple states away and broke.up with me as soon as she got there. I started looking around on dating apps and my god it's a dumpster fire. Any remotely attractive girl has an only fans, the rest are all either single moms or are irredeemably unattractive. I'm ready just to say Fuck this and stop using them.
>>30349968how did he abuse you?>>30350035This is why polygamy does not work out
>>30350291she probably had one of those guys that would tell her how terrible she looked and criticize everything she did but portray that everything was her fault to other people.t. had friends who have had people like that in their life
>>30349968sounds like my exare you a femanon? we could talk if u want
Lost my virginity and first kiss to a girl I met off of tinder after talking for 3 days and made her cum twice (felt her clench up and she was shaking on and off for an hour then we nonstop messaged for 4 days and she sent me recordings of her orgasming twice again one night, she said she couldn't wait to see me next and she fantasied about travelling our country together and then she went off of me after the 4 days and basically ghosted me (sent me a message saying not to bother visiting her because she was so busy despite her saying she couldn't wait a day to see me and her even replying for hours each day at work before) hasn't sent any message since then and it's been over a monthInitially I was overjoyed she replied after waiting a day to (she usually replied within 30min before) but then I took a step back and realised what she actually meant and that she was just being polite and not direct and honest with meIm 24 and shes 21
>have bf>love him a lot>steal each other's virginities>everything is good>he tells me he made friends with a girl>happy for him>but he starts dodging my calls and going no contact for days>lose touch, he just cut me off>say mean things and that im done with him>he never answers>he's still friends with heri wanted to think i was over it but i still cry about it sometimes
Every human being I meet thinks I'm going to be their free therapist. I've given up entirely.
I'm literally just here to bask in femanons' suffering. I don't even care about having a healthy relationship anymore
Apparently asking a woman what her hobbies are is pussy repellent.Admitting that I was emotionally abused as a child is pussy repellent."Be hot but also have confidence in yourself even if you're a fatass."I don't know what women want anymore but it seems like they just want a giant braggart who lies about everything.
>>30351496oh nah, we can see through that pretty quickly and lose interest.>>30349541I'm flighty and unavailable, but I've recently started to open up to the possibility of love for real. I'm pretty much retired from my hoe phase and if my heart gets broken after this I'll probably just throw myself into my work.
>>30351520Then wtf are we supposed to do? Seems like if you weren't getting pussy at 13 it's over for you because no one wants to bother teaching you.
>>30351523instead of lying about being confident and successful be confident and successfulor try low-status women
i was inattentive in my last relationshipi'm just hoe-ing around nowsometimes its fun, sometimes it feels hollow
>>30351531What the fuck even counts as success then? I have a good job but I don't want gold diggers or women who slutted around and then suddenly reformed.
>>30351534>try low-status women>noso stfu nigger
>>30351539You didn't answer my question.
>>30351540you didn't kill yourself (yet)
>>30351547I'm not the one who's gonna do that.
>>30349806this. for fuck's sake.
>SexMale /m/>DescriptionLooking for a bisexual girl (biological female) who is into 2D loli, and wants a relationship with a man. If your idea of a dream boyfriend is someone who gives you oral sex while you look at loli, contact me at firstname.lastname@example.orgPlease be 24yo or older.I am wealthy, come from a good family and some attractive women have found me good looking. Not larping, I just want to find someone who is like me, but that has been almost impossible.If you want to contact me anonymously, just make a protonmail. It won't ask you to use a phone number nor alternate email account.You guys are burned out because you are not looking for someone who is like you on small details, you are going for physical looks and shallow similarities. Be as specific as I am, you'll be alone for a while, but when you do find someone it will be decent, whether it works out or not in the end. Stop wasting all your energy on pointless relationships just because you can't endure being alone for 2 years or so.
Had my first proper relationship recently, was really fun. Spent plenty of weekends together on account of living in different cities. Then on Sunday she freaks out and says that I am always making her feel shit about herself and decides she wants to end things. Nothing could be further from the truth, she was the one always doubting herself and even wanting plastic surgery even though she didn't need it. I'm not happy or sad, just confused. I will be happy to have some solitude for a while but I those happy feelings are hard to get rid of, at least at this early stage. The way I see it, if a tall, fat bastard like me was able to get with a beautiful girl, then there's hope for all of us.
>>30351496I know the feeling, but it really is a case of having to keep going until you find someone who isn't insufferable on account of having gone through men like a raccon in a trash pile.
>>30351034>21There's your answer. investing extra, unnecessary emotion in the early 20s age group is a big mistake. Most people aren't serious about relationships or marriage until later.Maybe if they're religious or something.
All the girls I met irl and was interested in turned out to be in relationships already. Had one online friend I tried to get close to, but she ghosted me all of a sudden when I asked if we couldn't meet up. Then I had two online friends that treated me in ways that made it feel to me like I was in relationships. Both turned me down however. The first of those friendships was long time ago. Honestly it would have never worked out with that girl - she was too good for me. Still we kept in contact kinda. I was young, naive and believed if I improved myself as a person I could try again with her. Somehow I actually managed that in some ways - at least I got able to go outside, find jobs and properly study. Eventually she cut contact with her online friends, went overseas and my best friend who stalked her fb profile showed me pictures of her literal chad fiancee. Having to give up on her and realizing that I never had a chance in the first place (or at least having felt that way), among other stuff, hurt me so bad I ended up falling into a depression that I never managed to fully recover from. More than a decade later I met another girl like that. As much as I had intended to have grown as a person, ironically the past experience caused me to lose my head at the time I needed it the most. The result is that I screwed up with who I am confident is the most ideal girl in the world for me, and it doesn't appear that I can ever fix this.Just learning to accept my solitude now.
>>30351762Yeah but good luck finding that. Seems these days even the nerdy girls are ran through.
>>30349919You could always just talk about this with your partners
>>30352055How old are you?
Tired of putting on an act to make girls like me. Faking who you are for pussy is gay. My natural personality isnt attractive. I give up
>>30352055Honestly I've met really hot women and they're disgusting people. They are literally only nice to Chad. The rest of the time they talk shit like about how we should genocide ugly people then go on their Twitters and admit that if they weren't addicted to coke and had an ED they'd be as fat as the rest of us. I'm kinda just blackpilled in general. I don't want to be but it just doesn't seem like it's going to get any better.>>30352301Also this: no one will put up with my autism but I'm tired of having to pretend to be someone else.
I spent almost 3 years with this guy I met online(he was my first bf too) and he'd come visit me often and i thought everything was perfect, he seemed to really love and care for me and always mentioned to me how he wanted to have a family with me and get married. Long story short; he goes to military basic training and comes back a completely different person, he gets upset at me and distant and i assumed it was because he was in a major depressive episode so i try supporting him and giving him space whilst also comforting. Then i get a message from his friend telling me that he had been cheating on me, i break things off and few months later he comes back saying hes sorry and he really means it when he says he loves me and that he wants to be committed to me only .. i was foolish enough to believe him and i ended up being lied to again.. he was cheating again and worst of all he had been doing it all throughout our relationship, even when i thought we were happy together.now he just seems to be coping by telling everyone online that I was the one who cheated and manipulated him and did all this horrible stuff to him.. just want this BPD mentally ill dude to leave me alone..
>>30352305All those girls I mentioned were always nice to me despite myself being underweight. One of them even had real model looks.What even made you respond to my post?
>>30352332I'm high. Anyways you sound like you still gotta chance I hope things work out for you.
>>30352337That would be nice. Thank you. I hope you get to meet a nice girl too anon.
I dont even know what to do now honestly.Every single relationship i had of any kind is just shit, decent at the very best. Im not even looking for appearance and such, Im just looking for someone that i can be happy with and have a good time. All of this shit makes me hopeless and void because i cant fuckin stand how awful some ppl might be.
just got dumped last night by probably the love of my life. every fucking relationship for me goes the same. someone is so crazy about me that they build up this perfect person that i'm really not. then if i make a mistake or do something i regret, they want nothing to do with me because i'm not this perfect manic pixie dream boy they thought i was. the point of loving someone is to work through problems with them, not leave them at the first sign of trouble. i was genuinely ready to change and be better, and they weren't having it
>>30352317It sounds like you have put a lot of effort into self improvement in the past - don't let it go to waste. You're self aware enough to realize where you fucked up, reach out to the last girl and try to make it work. If it can't be fixed forgive yourself and move on.>>30349541I'm only tired of two types of people - those who refuse to put in any effort/don't have enough patience to focus on one person, and those who aren't introspective enough to know if they have mental issues.I fell for the second kind twice. First time I was naive and idealistic, second time I thought I was knowledgeable enough to notice the red flags.I'm looking for a very particular man so dating irl seems impossible. I don't think I'd ever find what I'm looking for outside 4chan.Started talking to someone recently and it looks so promising. I have to stop myself from getting too excited and hurting myself/ruining it in the process.
>>30352438>I'm looking for a very particular man so dating irl seems impossible. I don't think I'd ever find what I'm looking for outside 4chan.Care to explain this?
>>30349541Swipe culture has really killed dating. It's lowered interaction to a simple motion. Women pretty much have all control when it comes to dating as well, and most have unrealistic demands. If you are not at least 6 feet tell and a 6 figure job, you are going to seriously struggle trying to find someone unless you are a 10/10. Because of how online dating works as well, most women don't take it seriously and forget they are even on an app. So many times have I seen "I'm not on here much and I delete this often". Men are expected to not only start the conversation but also hold it while only getting 1 word responses. If you try too hard you will be seen as clingy. It just feels like a no win situation.I'm so tired of putting in effort just to not get any in return. It's so damn demoralizing.
>>30352471Ask me how I know you're a big fat person that hasn't even attempted to diet or go to the gym
>>30352515>I know you're a big fat personExcept I'm not though. I have a pretty regular work out routine and walk every day after work as well.
>>30352515>>30352525>Except I'm not thoughI believe this. I'm a successful IT manager in good physical shape and I can't even get women to respond, let alone hold a conversation.
>>30351068sorry to hear this anon. Hits hard. I'm wishing you well. Don't have any advice. You deserve the world, if only the world knew.
>>30352899my story is complex in theory but simple in practice. Met a lady from discord server and loved her dearly until we broke up 3 years in because I made her depressed. I was too emotionally inaccessible. We stayed friends for a year, but I was quite insecure and her actions reinforced my feelings. Eventually she ghosted me. Only true friend I've ever had that I've felt comfortable with. Now trying to figure out how to muster up the mental fortitude to move on.
My friend made a perfectly good friendship into a sexual relationship only to reveal they are asexual and regrets everything. This was a relationship that was over a year and now I'm 30 with only 2 boyfriends to count. First was a narcissist who kept stalking me after the break up and litterally fucking moved finally because his current supply gave him and ultimatum. I couldn't date at all during the terrorizing. And now this.
>>30349541I have been rejected more times than I have asked out someone. Girls just don't find me attractive. Plus I was exposed to liberal propaganda, so I don't even think girls like men or have sexual feelings.
dating is silly in the year of our lord 2021
>>30352438I haven't put enough effort into myself, else I wouldn't be here right now. Suppose I will see where life takes me. The idea that I could find a better one than the last girl I fucked up with still seems too absurd however.> I don't think I'd ever find what I'm looking for outside 4chan.You couldn't talk with your guys about their mental issues? Because I'm sure pretty much everyone here has them anyways. You seem to be looking for a golden egg as much as I am.
>>30351523You're not entitled to anyone having to teach you, kek.
Honestly I feel like I missed the times when it was easy to get laid. My big fat stupid friend managed it and now all you get these days are comments like this: >>30353356It seems like our culture is becoming South Korea. Shallow, narcissistic and abusive, with all of these being considered aspirational qualities to have.
>>30353360It's true tho. The world doesn't owe you anything. And being a bitch to women and calling everyone shallow certainly doesn't help with your being unattractive lmao.
>>30353377>woman who had everything handed to her
>>30353380ah, there's your problem. You assume that people had it easier just because you can't cope. Imagine being so privileged that the biggest problem you can think of is being single forever.
>>30353387Nah I was just abused but I was owed nothing right? So fuck you too.
>>30353390>abusedAssuming I wasn't? You keep making the same mistake, kek. Like I could go on about my violent childhood and sexual assault but you're worse off because you can't get your dick wet right?
>>30353401Yes we all have damage. The drugs don't work to cope anymore.
>>30353403Maybe stop being a disrespectful little bitch if you want people to like you. Everyone's as complex and introspective (if not more) as you are. And again nobody owes you anything.
The kinds of guys I like aren’t really boyfriend material. I’ve pretty much given up on having a relationship.
>>30353410I wouldn't know about them being introspective because everyone keeps to themselves and doesn't want to talk about what they think even when I try to pick their brain about shit.
>>30353412baby steps ig. Unironically make a friend.
>>30353452I have some friends but they keep quiet about everything.
>>30349968We're in love. Let's fix this
>>30351034This sounds so much like my story it hurts.Met a chick online back in 2017. She was super cute and basically everything I ever wanted. Over the following 4 months spent all the time in the world talking to her and we got along and getting to know each other. Sex followed too.Then A family member died and she was there for me through it, but not long after she ghosted me for a month and a half. She came back and we dated for a while, but over time the ghosting just kept happening and got longer and longer. Eventually was going multiple months on end eithout hearing from her.Every time she gave me a decent reason, she has a very religious family and everything but the doubt crept in more and more. I guess to only my surprise she just flat out messaged me last year that she has a boyfriend and to leave me alone.Do I ever think we were really dating? I feel like we were, for the first two years. After that she either got bored or forced to date someone else by family but how she tossed me aside wasn't much better. IDK why i typed all this out, I'm just so burnt out and don't really feel like dating anyone else even though there's been opportunities. Doesn't feel like there's much of a point.
>>30352458>Care to explain this?Most of it is related to the lifestyle I have/want to have and I don't want to describe it all here.>>30353352Why are you focusing on finding a 'better' girl? Ultimately the only thing that matters is if you're compatible and connect on a deeper level. Don't lower your standards, but stop treating your exes as indicators of what will make you happy.>You couldn't talk with your guys about their mental issues?Some disorders won't manifest the way others will. Some people can live their whole life not knowing they have a problem. When you look into the narcissistic personality disorder you'll find out that self-aware narcissists are rare, and those who gain insight rarely treat it as a motivation to change, if anything it can make them more adaptable and undetectable due to their knowledge on how to hide negative traits better. That's why therapists have a really hard time treating them, a narcissist can revert to the old form overnight if their supply is depleted and they're forced to find a new victim.So you're right, everyone is bent in one way or another, but some disorders are impossible to detect until the shit hits the fan.
Ive only been in two relationships. the first I ended because her mother as very controlling and needed her approval for everything and had no original thought of her own. My second relationship she forced me into fingering her when i wanted to wait and it started a chain of her continually saying im the reason shes going to hell among other things. She also refused to stay on her meds and refused to go against her mother. Her mother had made it very known that i was going to hell because my brother is gay and that I'm going because I'm Christian. She wanted me to pay for everything saying it was a mans job while comparing me to her brothers but admitting that her brothers didn't start paying until they lived together. Her family was dysfunctional and she had a very warped view on families and relationships. I was both of their first boyfriends and each one felt different to the last. The first girl we basically just kissed and cuddled and felt like a elementary school romance while the second girl i fingered her, saw her naked, and she jacked me off one time. That felt like more of a high school relationship Dating is at its current state because of dating apps and the lack of ability to form meaningful connections and women having to many options. The advice I always receive is I'm better trying to go to a bar and find someone that way. I'm 20 years old and I get sad seeing couples on campus or in public because it reminds me how alone I am and how trying to maintain my values in a bad environment is a constant struggle. When I try and go for chicks who are into anime all of them are 24/7 pot smokers or vapers, half of them regularly hook up with people and are just looking for intimacy's of any kind, than the other segment has an only fans they trying to promote while simoutanesouly looking for a boyfriendWhen no girl seems to pass a low hurdle is that indicative of me, or of where im trying to find them?I don't even want normal, I just want not crazy
>>30354751I think what im trying to say with this vent is that be it the types of people that apps attract or the general quality of people it is hard to find someone. I'm still on dating apps looking but I'm left wondering if there's someplace better to look. I just dont want a girl that smokes or vapes. after that i wanan see if we mesh Apparently those 2 hurdles on apps are near impossible to clearWelp i sad boy posted for enough if you cared enough to read this far Good luck, wether your a guy or girl i hope you have good luck in trying to find someone
I think people just find being disposable to be aspirational. That's why no one wants to love anymore, because love would require some amount of commitment and unconditional love.
>>30354232>Why are you focusing on finding a 'better' girl?It's just how I am. Don't feel like I could really move on unless a new girl makes me feel even better than previous ones. I'd feel like shit being in a relationship with someone while wishing to be with someone else.But I realize the way I love is probably not normal and that I can get way too attached. Letting go is not really in my blood it seems.>Some people can live their whole life not knowing they have a problem. Isn't that why you should tell them, give them a chance to improve themselves? Nobody in their right mind enjoys hurting or disappointing a loved one.
Last relationship ended like 2 years ago, after months of being treated like a freak by the 'ex', made fun of by her and her friends behind my back, lied to and cheated on (probably the entire time we were together). All things considered, I'm thankful at least that I didn't catch an sti or something from her. Figured I should disregard women as romantic partners, but guys are even more awful desu, so I doubt I'll ever date anyone again.>>30352330>BPDLiterally the most difficult 'mental illness' to deal with, especially in any sort of romantic sense. It's like most people with bpd aren't even capable of love, just something synthetic that they can masquerade as love.
This is going to sound very prententious but I can't find a girl who is at my level mentally. Everyone I can find, admittedly through tinder and bumble since dating in university life doesn't work now, is so incredibly basic and unfocussed. There is no fountain of life energy in them driving them forward and no mental machinery that can keep up with mine let alone add something. I want to discuss epistemology and ethics, make interesting program project together, have someone to play chess with, or heck even something physical like a wood working-project, gym buddies or long camping trip. But the average person (that managed to pass through the first filters) I meet is far from that, seeking comfort and a simple life. And based on how the bell curve works my dating pool if I want a proper 'other half' is just so much smaller than others. I know there is someone out there that is like me, but finding that person seems impossible.
>>30355287>admittedly through tinder and bumble since dating in university life doesn't work nowThis is also a big part of it, swipe culture kinda ruined everything.
>>30355287try to meet girls organically and in places that correlate with your interests, i met my bf at an open art studio
>>30355302I would if I could. Nothing gets organized here in the NL, both due to the lockdown, the summer vacation and generally not enough people motivated enough for the niche-subjects. It's hard not to be fatalistic about it but it looks like my dating life is pretty dead for now.
>>30349968>seems like all the nice, normal guys r too shy to approach girlsNot that this is necessarily true, but this some clown shit. Most men don't even exist to women, hell I'm honestly very good looking and a woman approaching me (at least IRL) is pretty uncommon. 95% of men will have to approach women if they don't want to die alone and unloved.
>>30352330This sounds VERY Familiar, and if you are who I think you might be, basically everything in this post is a complete lie.
I didn't know you'd be looking for my replacement so fast and in so many threads. I give up in so many ways..I wasted so much on such a manipulative man. It was much better staying inside, knowing no one.
>>30356986you replaced me first
>>30349541Never had a girlfriend. Only used dating apps, not sure how to cold approach women irl
It’s the flighty flakey bullshit that annoys me. Things always go great having fun and laughing and flirting and then the next day I wake up to find out I’m blocked. Like, is that what’s cool these days? Is everybody bipolar or some shit?
>>30356989What ever makes you feel right. Good luck.
>>30349541I think i'm angry with my ex (if i can even call her that) but i also feel insane because i can't help but think its my fault, maybe i really am manipulative and awful, this is the second person to tell me this and the only cope i have is that the first person is a diagnosed narcissist and literally stole from me years after the break up.I met her on discord, i talked to her every day, i flew her here, she said she loved me and i feel stupid for believing it because it got me attached almost immediately and i cried when she went home.We stopped talking a month ago. I kept bringing up our situation and what it was supposed to be. "Mutual exclusivity" was the arrangement but i tried to pressure this into something more solid by saying we were basically dating. talking every day, seeing each other, having sex, exclusive. She had a panic attack over the insinuation, she was essentially phobic of relationships and had awful past experiences i wanted to help alleviate the trauma of by being better (i know this is dumb you don't have to tell me).She used to really like me and this changed drastically when she got home, almost instantly. She said it was because i asked when i would see her again instead of "how are you feeling" knowing her ear infection hadn't cleared up, and this changed her entire perception of me day-of and she stopped saying she loved me.trust issues spiked for obvious reasons i think.we stopped talking a month ago because i cut it off, i felt like i was an emotional drain to her and what i wanted and what she wanted wasn't compatible. but she made me feel like i ruined everything and i'm not over it.I still watch the videos we made together and see her smiling and looking into my eyes and holding my face and it makes me want to kill myself.I feel like i am completely unsuited to loving someone in this life, i feel like i ask too much. I also feel easy to lead on for those reasons. idk what to do anymore.
Worked as hard as I could to improve myself but I still can't find even one woman who is willing to get to know me
I literally gave up.I'm still using dating apps and what have you but I'm getting no real results. I don't go out much (asides from work) and I'm just very burnt out on everything with the pandemic still ongoing.It also doesn't help that I'm short and fat. I'm comfortable with my weight but I feel like people take one look at it and go "nah, pass"Maybe I try again when things are more 'normal' but I think I'm done.
>>30357226Anon it sounds like you pressured her way too much and she wasn't comfortable with it. Sometimes it's better to just let things be in a relationship if they're working. I think she wanted you to be more attentive to her needs and trauma. If you let her know that you're ready to go when she is but that it's okay if she needs to take things slow, things probably could've turned out fine. If you contacted her again and made sure to do things right this time I think you might still have a change together.
>>30349968No shit, you literally have to learn to be a sociopathic liar in order to be what most women want. The human race is gonna go to shit thanks to its current immoral trends, and I'm talking about human decency and lack of desire to grow, not just promiscuity.
>>30357516i don't think we're compatible, my trust issues are too severe to be okay with an undefined relationship with no clarity on top of the disparity between the height and speed of decline in her feelings towards me compared to its peak, and her trauma is too severe to have one and that hesitation and knowledge of what i want would permeate every interaction and make everything feel awkward, one sided and forced unless i try to fake being okay with it all for her sake and i'm not gunna do that i know how that ends up.Also knowing her i think she'd rather not anyway, abandonment issues, and i abandoned her lol coming back now would literally seem manipulative and cruelly triggering probably, i don't want to feel like i'm hurting her either yk.Idk what i want, im trying to convince myself it wasn't my fault entirely, that she had a part in knowing what would happen knowing who i was too and ignored it in the same way i did. I just don't feel right putting responsibility for that on her for some reason. idk why i'm protecting her like that anymore. stupid.
stupid cocksucker broke up with me 2 months in because he 'couldn't make me happy' when he knows I have severe depression, apparently his sense of self-worth depends entirely on making his partner kiss his ass, he wants love yet refuses to give it, why do I always attract such shitty people who parade themselves around as nice?
>>30357086That's so incredibly unfair. I'm not going to air our dirty laundry on a public forum, but you have to understand your hypocrisy here. Not to mention posting where you know I'd see it as opposed to actually talking with me
>>30349541I'm a 24 year old MtF who has tried several rounds of dating, and each one has sucked. 1st round: Attempted to date using Grindr, Tindr, and OkCupid. Grindr: Got bombarded with dry dick and anus pics and guys asking me to top themTindr: Kept getting umatched after telling people I was trans, so I put the fact that I was trans on my profile and got bombarded with guys asking to suck me off or have me top themOkCupid: Same as Tindr except the people were creepier2nd Round:Tindr: Much less creepy men, but they were still horny af, eventually met this really handsome military guy who kept telling me how much he wanted us to meet up and then he ghosted me the night we were going to meet up after telling me that he still wanted to meet up.OkCupid: Went on a date with someone from this app, he was very weirdHinge: Had several nice dates using this app, but I was just mentally and emotionally exhausted by the time I met some genuinely nice guys. I recently ended up rejecting each of the guys I went out with. I told them politely that I wasn't ready for a relationship and that I appreciated their time. Honestly, after a lot of emotional issues and a 3 year long abusive relationship I found myself in from online dating. I think I just need time to find myself and to find happiness on my own. I have my friends and my family and that's what I need right now. I really would want to have a nice and caring bf, but I just don't have luck with these kinds of things. And that's okay.
>>30358353do you lurk the discord threads and such? lots of oddballs ofc but some decent people. making friends with similarities can lead anywhere really.
>>30358373I haven't tried, I'm usually too timid about that kind of stuff lol. I mean, I'm honestly at a point in my life where I'm genuinely okay with just being friends with people. Some of the happiest times I've had in the past few weeks were talking to a friend I made on this website with a similar background to me. So I'm open to checking out those discords.
Try my best, get turned down regardless.Girls want guys who are 6ft+ and making 6 figures. I'm neither. At this moment, it doesn't feel like I'm going to get anywhere in my life.
>>30358403Yup. I've seen even non-passing teen trannies want boyfriends who are 6ft, built like fuck and accomplished. I get aiming for the stars and all that but there's some real delusional, vain people out there.
>>30358416Like i don't feel like i'm asking for much, but because of wage and how i look that is a million dollar dream for me.
I just got out of a 12 year relationship in which about half of it was me being constantly berated and verbally abused. By a woman. I've had serious depression almost my entire adult life. I got ketamine treatment in December last year and it gave me the equivalent of a soul again. I became aware of how toxic and shitty our relationship was within *days* of finishing my last round to the point it made me feel temporarily like I wanted to die (but thankfully the treatment works so I quickly said no thanks).I'm 31 now and I'm seeing what the game is like and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I have signed up for the dating apps and it's just endless piles of obese women, single moms, woke commies and spam profiles. I just want to experience wholesome love. I don't think I ever had it before as we got together out of high school and I was a virgin and was already starting to suffer from major depression then.Like I was 100% loyal to a fault for 12 years. I had to end a bad relationship and now because I've tried to save myself I've kinda fucked myself instead. That's how I feel. I don't feel like it matters if you're handsome, average, or ugly. There are just so many people out there who don't give a shit about their bodies and their minds that it feels hopeless.All I really want at the end of the day is a 4chan girlfriend(female) at this point. Or just anyone who isn't morbidly obese, doesnt want to fuck Jesus while you watch, isn't a woke commie, and doesn't have 10 kids from 6 different men.I can't say it makes me want to die, because since I've since the ketamine I have this constant stream of hope. I can say that old me probably would've painted the ceiling with my brains by now.
>>30358527Also to add, while I definitely enjoy sex, I'm not a hypersexual person at all. I've not attempted anything close to a hookup or quickie yet, and I never intend to. I'm looking for the hardest fucking thing to find; an actual trustworthy partner.
I tried not to let my childhood decide my futureI will not try again
>>30356614Fuck you because I'm a different anon with almost EXACTLY the same story. >bf goes to basic>"I've changed, i love you, I want to be a real man for you">cheat cheat cheat>lie lie lieI guess lying is easier than actually being a good person but god damn. Youre fucking with other peoples heads and hearts... Rot in hell...
>>30358846>>30352330Shit, I'm sorry to hear. Honestly though it happened more the other way, but i guess guys can be as heartless as women.
i met him on here so idk if he'll see this but whateveri think i'm kind of done with online dating where you meet someone and try to date off the bat rather than just dating someone you're friends withlast 2 relationships has been online dating like that, and its an ldr that collapsed as soon as i asked him to start making more of an effort (after giving him ultimatums which just led me on for months), and then another relationship where the incompatibilities added up, but he also had some issues he had to work throughneither of these lasted for years which i guess is the silver lining but idki had one good relationship and we were friends before so i think that's what i need to do from now onexcept now i have like 0 friendsso i guess i gotta work on that
>>30357911>>30357086Did you guys ever talk and confirm that you are even responding to each other here or is this a potential larp
>>30359203a larp is a live action role play. it would just be a regular rp since it's not taking place in real lifeyes, they are the person i thought they were. i knew it was them right away because i love that person more than i've ever loved anyone in my life and the way they write is unmistakable to me
Dated my first love of my life for 3 and a half years, she ended up ending things over a misunderstanding. It's been 7 months and my feelings haven't diminished even after shes dragged me all over social media for no reason other than to cope, accusing me of things I could never happened. I can't help but say that I still dream about her every now and then, thinking about what could of been if it hadn't ended. I dunno, still wish her the best even after everything. No more alt girls I guess
>>30349541I've never had a girlfriend. Tried dating apps before but they never worked for me.
>>30351747You will never find someone, you will die alone, commit neck rope, also wrong thread fag
I have ruined every relationship that I have ever gotten to, whether it be friendships or more. I feel like something else is wrong with me other than just depression and sperginess.
>>30359107this is me, except I'm a dude and had the same experience with women