>kills you're AAA franchise
>uff, that was a close one
metroid was already irrelevant
>>727606949kek he is so soulful
Is the rest of the game good if I think I can tolerate him and liked the other 3 Prime games even at their lowest points?
>>727606736>you're
>>727606949Why does that building look like a vagina?
>>727606736> "Oh yeah it's morphin' time!"Fuck I love it when Samus says that
>>727606949Well... That just happened...
>>727606949A return to form...
>>727606949Written by a millennial white woman with pronouns.
>>727606736>>727606949Literally me
>AAAIsn't Metroid always a "niche" franchise compared to Mario. Metroid games weren't exactly blockbusting hits.
>>727606736>>727606949tendies will truly praise feces and eat them with gusto as long as nintendo sells them
>metroid>aaai hope this never happens
>>727606736Okay so. If this guy was some hot nerdy girl instead or shota. Would you like it then?
>>727607338Prime is about as AAA as it gets for Nintendo, they were always pushing hardware
>>727607563>ummm you only don't like the characters because they're unlikeableyeah you got it champ
>>727607563They have a kinda hot nerdy girl who spergs out over Samus and I don't like her either.
>>727606736(AVGN voice) WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?
>>727606949Yeah, i can tell these are the writers of God of War Ragnarok.
>>727607571>Prime is about as AAA as it gets for NintendoMario games fit the bill better. Games like Xenoblade, Fire Emblem, and Pikmin are the same level of "niche" as Metroid.
>>727606736>Someone spent their time photoshopping this to make this post
>>727607563Cute child either gender and game would be fine
>>727606949I love MacKenzie so much it's unreal
Why is Samus a silentard in this game? The annoying chatterbox should comment why the bitch never talks
>mfw unlearning every bad thing I said about Forspoken and High On Life so I can praise the latest Nintendo release
>>727608869Stop being a faggot nobody is praising it and if they are it's probably you samefagging to keep up your gay little Nintendo obsession
>>727607129How do you know what a vagina looks like?
>>727608769Other M mindbroke the fanbase.
>>727609051Fuck off Dobson
>>727608990There was nothing defensive about your post at all fellow anon, keep up the good work!
>>727609051>>727608769GOODMORNING SARPLEASE GIB SAMUS VOICE AND EPIC CUTSCENE LUV U VERY MUCH
>>727606736Metroid was never AAA.
>>727606949He should have been smashed by another boulder right after saying "I'm okay"
If Makenzie was a girl alien with a big ol butt none of you would care
what wrong with a character following the dorky sidekick archetype
Seriously though, why did this happen? Did the studio do this out of spite? Or were they ordered to have a team of Sages like in Zelda?
>>727606949Can we get a list started?>so THAT just happened>he’s right behind me isn’t he >ummm AWKWARD>amazeballs/awesomesauce>I just did a thing!
>>727607563>shotawell fuck you now I’m doubly mad
Metroid was never AAA
>>727609754>if this ugly annoying man was a sexually attractive woman I bet you wouldn’t care!duh?
>>727607462>an alternate universe where McKenzie is a distraught, depressed salary-man engineer who just shuts up and does his job like he has for the past 20 years of his pathetic lifeIt's not like the core idea is terrible, the execution and above all writing of the character are just so fucking retarded.
this is proof that nintendies will defend literally anything nintendo does. they were making fun of millenial movie games for years before this lmao.
>>727606736>Metroid>AAA
>>727610575I’ve been a nintendie since 1994 but I’ve never cared for Metroid
>>727606949HOLY FUCK HES SO FUCKING FUNNY
>>727609754I do not want to be spoken to in the middle of my Metroid game it ruins the immersion. At most I want Samus to be briefed and then sent away to be alone on a scary planet. Dread couldn't understand this and neither could Fusion or Other M
>>727609754>shit on annoying female characterYou just hate her because she's a woman!>shit on annoying male characterYou wouldn't hate her if she was a hot woman!
>>727607101you just might be the target audience
>>727606949shitlennials just like boomers deserve to get gangraped in Hell by demons
>>727606736>AAA franchise
>>727606736Why are shartyfags in game development now?
>>727610020Would have been sick. Man accepts his death alone in the wilds at the start of the game.
>>727606949The worst part about this is that it will instantly sour the general public's opinion on any future metroid games having npcs in the same way Other M soured the general public on Samus talking. Which is a shame because both things can 100% work and even enhance a metroid game, as shown in the best metroid game from the last two decades Silksong.
>>727611292If you think this is bad wait until future writers start dictating AI prompts for peak zoomer comedy.
Remember when tendies were coping that he's totally a 10 minute tutorial NPC who goes away after
In that post-ironic way he's so annoying that I find every post with this fuck funny and endearing. His face has transcended that obnoxious trope into being a self aware parody of the trope, but through shitposts and not the writing of the devs
>>727611418It would endear you to him and make you want to protect him. As he is I want him to die every second he is alive, and I don't even have the game yet.
>>727606736He did the right thing, he didn't fall for the bait.
>Sarge, get a load of this
>>727611670he would have been kino if if he was killed in the most brutal way by a random monster after the 5 minute intro
>>727611610>tendiesMost Nintendo fans were shitting on him as soon it was revealed. Even King tendie Arlo. Only people defending it were you famitsufags.
>>727607563Frankly, and I admit I am biased, but I think a Samus/Shota dynamic could be good. I mean anything could be good if done well, but for me it's the precedent of the baby metroid in II and Super, and Samus' suppressed motherly instincts being a constant theme. I know how I'd write it, but that's just me. Re: Myles. I initially hated Myles. I still hate him. But I'm having a hard time staying mad at the character now that I know he's Kensuke Tanabe's self insert. I called Myles an ugly character, but I'd never say that to an actual person. That said thoughIf I were Tanabe, I wouldn't have had my self insert character be a soldier. I don't believe Myles is a solder. Lots of factors go into why this doesn't work. But I would have believed the character if he were a Federation researcher. A civilian. Maybe even, if we're running with the self insert idea, researching holograms, or VR, or simulations - to have some resonance with the idea of Tanabe being a producer for these games. I'd also make sure he's fun to be around, and visiting him is always enjoyable and a benefit to the player. This is all very doable from a writers standpoint.
>>727606949>if they just killed him here we could've had a good game
>>727611426The thing is that if you make a game with a silent protagonist, you can't just make them start talking in a sequel. Skillsong worked because Hornet is not the same guy you played as in the first game.
>>727606949being white and competent is racist
>We're gonna need a bigger gun
>>727607129There is vaginal shaped buildings all over this game. Retro studios was very horny. At least its not a bunch of dicks.
>Sarge, she turned into a freaking ball, Sarge
>>727611705>He can be found around the map learning how to survive, lighting campfires and catching small game with shitty tripwires
>>727607563not in a metroid game.
>>727611872>Samus/Shota dynamic could be goodAnon, there's a whole official manga about that called "Samus and Joey".
>>727612168Somehow I don't imagine it's done well. But I'm interested. Where do I read it?
>>727612312It actually is good.www.metroiddatabase.com/old_site/manga has all four volumes fan translated.
>>727607563I can't help but see it as having Rick Moranis following you around
>>727606736kills my're AAA franchise?
>>727612964yore dead
>>727606736>kills your level design.
How did this borderlands character end up in metroid and why does he even look like the human personification of the yellow handholding paint
>>727606736Wrong ootsnoy. This is saving games by making them more like films. It's not 1996, movie theaters are huge right now. get with the times.
>>727613139This is the real crime. Prime 4 isn't a Metroid game.
>>727611925But the reason Samus is a silent protaganist isn't because she can't speak. She's not meant to be a self insert like Link. She doesn't speak because in most metroid games she is entirely alone. But she still has internal monologues and talks to herself. If you're gonna add NPCs there's no reason not to have her speak
>>727611872The fact he's a producer self insert makes him even worse
>>727612562I guess the thing is, if I ever somehow ended up in charge of a Metroid game and got to run with this idea, I'd have the shota character be mute. Not necessarily actually mute, but just he and Samus wouldn't talk. I think that's sort of a must for making a shota/Samus dynamic likeable. He would have to be a character that people enjoy having in the game, and the character having basically an empty personality that people can see traits they find likeable in, would be the trick. I've got more ideas re: this, but idk if they're worth posting. Nobody should care about my fanfic.
>>727614221Honestly yea. It's awful. I just imagine myself in a room with Tanabe and I would be less mean about Myles. Tanabe is getting a lot of hate, apparently he's also done wrong by Chibi Robo and Paper Mario, but seeing the games he's produced, to me he actually seems like one of the better producers working in the industry. Idk if anyone will hear me on this, but I actually respect his interest in the Galactic Federation marines. With his work on previous Prime games I wonder if he still thinks he's competing with Halo. I'd love to talk to the guy frankly, and hear what he's thinking.
>>727606949only seething browns hate this based white man getting to breed Samus Aryan pussy.
>>727606949What the fuck were they thinking?
>>727606949
>>727611965>>727609001>>727607129>YOU GOTTA START BREEDING SAAARS!! HIMORI-SAN!!
>>727607563> mfw I already made a thread about thisFeelsbad
>>727607129There's so much vaginal architecture all over this game.
Followup to this >>727614640No one cares about this bullshit I'm about to say. But on some level I get it. I get the Federation Marines. They ARE cool on some basic otaku level. Or they should be. They're at their coolest in Prime 2 and 3 when they're competent super soldiers. On some level I think I get why Kensuke Tanabe thinks they're cool. If I understand correctly, Kensuke Tanabe apparently co-produced Metroid Prime with Miyamoto and a few other people, and then stepped more fully into the produce role with Prime 2. And then was the sole producer on Prime 3. Honestly yea, that's a concerning track record. Each game got more "Halo" as his influence grew. But Halo isn't a bad game. I suspect Retro Studios, as an American influence on Nintendo, probably also had a lot to do with the gradual Halofication of the Prime games, and influenced Nintendo's views on what Metroid is. The thing that's tricky is that the Halo series became a straight up critique of the USA military jingoism of the 2000's. Halo straight up critiqued the US George Bush "War on Terror". The original Halo games are anti-war in the way MGS games are anti-war. So basically Halo itself kind of ended (in 2010, with the last real Halo game) with the idea that blindly being a soldier isn't cool or fun. And this is why the Federation Marines haven't worked. On a very basic level they're cool, power armor soldiers, but Halo was arguably a direct anti-war piece against being a soldier. So while Halo was sort of against the idea of blind military service, Nintendo is still looking at the Federation with this early 00's jingoism mindset.
>>727606949So quirky and shet
>>727611437>boomer's genetic discharge thinking it's better than anythingl o l
>>727615767Anon, you ARE boomer's genetic discharge
>Making fun of my shitty slapstick reddit character, huh? Need I remind you of [shitty slapstick reddit character from other franchise]? That's what I thought!
>>727616002My parents were born in 1965, just missed the cutoff lmao.
>>727607563>or shotaLiterally free money and popularity
Fuck it, since I suck at making threads, I'll just post my bullshit here. I'm a complete newfag, and I don't have anywhere else to sperg out. I don't know how to 4chan and I don't have the time to lurk morePic related is Nicole from Erosuit Samus X by Onomeshin. He's cute as fuck, and if he were in Metroid Prime 4 instead of Miles MacKenzie, I would have bought that shit in a heartbeat.You have to understand: a shota/femboy/tomgirl is the only type of male that you can actually plausibly pair Samus with. No one else works. Look what happened when they tried to shove Anthony Niggs in your face: instant rejectionAdam Malkovich: is deadDoom Guy/Master Chief: pure copiumLittle Mac: lolwutYou know this is true
>>727606736>You're SAAR, DO THE NEEDFUL AND REDEEM PS5, VISHNU HATES NINTENDO SAAR, DO NOT REDEEM SWITCH
>>727606949Why was it okay for Valve to put a dimwitted comic relief sidekick into a claustrophobic single player shooter all those years ago but now it's suddenly some crime against humanity?
>>7276162981. Wheatley had character and was actually funny2. Portal always had a black comedy angle to it, it's just replacing GLaDOS' recordings with Wheatley's commentary3. Even if you hate Wheatley he's the final boss and you get to kill him
>>727616220That design is a little much for a T rated Nintendo game...
>>727606949tendies desperately want me to believe it's just a coincidence that metroid prime turned into millennial marvel quip slop after pic related was a writer on it
>>727616518Ah yes the VIDF working overtime I seeIt's only okay when based gaben does it
>>727608230not that it takes any long to edit a pic like that, can be done in less than 10 minutes
he's not that bad
>>727616298>>727616518Portal 2 was actually already pretty annoying. It wasn't hated at the time, but we also weren't saturated in this kind of quippy writing at the time. And I remember Portal 2 as being a point where people started being slightly annoyed.
>>727616854>It wasn't hated at the time, but we also weren't saturated in this kind of quippy writing at the timeI really like Portal 2 but this is a fair point.Portal 2 came out over a full year before Whedon Avengers did
>>727606949The more I see of him the more I like. I think the silly supporting cast of fawning Samus fans is kind of kino. Looking forward to playing this.
>>727606736Myles is funny and a stand-up guy.
Wheatley was saved by the mid-game tweest of him betraying you, made him so much more memorable than if he was only the dumb british robot following you around
>>727606736>you'repajeet
>242kek, retard falling for the oldest bait
>>727616298Wheatley's entire existence is to be a retard made to slow down GladosSo unless Myles is canonically disabled or retarded in universe, which hes not cause hes a tech engineer, then its not comparable.
>>727606949Why does everything I like have to end up like this
>>727616298it's only ok when /v/'s god, Valve, does it. Everything Nintendo does is bad
>>727617650
Once the Metacritic drops to 79, we can properly start another round of "I killed the franchise with my freaking mind!" jokes.
>>727616982Wheatly isn't so bad, but Cave Johnson is straight up bad writing IMO. Portal is supposed to take place in the Half Life universe, Apeture being a similar corporation to Black Mesa. Portal 1 and 2 are funny, and it's ok to have a more lighthearted spin on the Half-Life universe, but Cave Johnson crosses the line into just being an actual idiot who completely takes the weight out of the Half-Life setting if we're supposed to believe Portal and Half-Life really are in the same universe. It's not like it's a big issue nowadays, but I don't see people talk about this often.
>>727617739>security blanket mega-hitler
>>727616147hag x shota is kino
>>727616147Or a loli.
>>727606949Do tendies really?
>>727618580*lick*
>>727606949SOVL
>>727606736>AAA franchiseLmao
I just don't understand it. I honestly don't. Just who finds this funny? No one does. I'm sure most normies probably just tollerate these characters in movie or barely pay attention to them while fucking smoking weed or something. But genuinely, does anyone know of a person who finds this funny? Which goes to say, do the writers find them funny? Are they self dellusional? It's honestly so baffling, I don't understand how something like this comes into existence much more becoming a trend.t. millenial.
>>727606949Errrrm, he's right behind me, isn't he?
>>727607563>shota escort in a Metroid game
>>727606949BLIZZAGA!
Now I really want to play a story driven metroid game where samus has to protect and bond with a shota.
>>727619229The point isn't as much being funny as it is making noisePeople without internal monologues cannot handle ininterrupted silence for too long
>>727611872imagine animating your boss's face day in day out
>>727606736I like when he cracks a joke and then it just cuts to a shot of samus, saying nothing, doing nothing.
>>727607563Nope because the game also has a nerdy girl and she is also insanely annoying
You're all fucking idiots.
>>727607563Samus would bully him so much, it'd be brutal
>>727613139>go to new area after 20 straight minutes of biking across a featureless desert with no music>meet quirk chungus sidekick who quips constantly>get new power up that lets me progress through the completely linear are>exploration, if you can even call it that, consists of a sidekick screaming in my ear that missiles can open up missile doors>fight boss where the sidekick yells at me that i can use my attacks to damage the boss>rinse and repeat until you fight sylux where 6 fucking npcs all tell me how to fight himabsolute dogshit game i need to go replay prime 2 so i can wash the whedon flavor out of my mouth
>Vinny mutes all of MacKenzie's dialogue>the animation alone makes him a lot more endearingInteresting
>>727620147Vanity and artistry are always close-by, but should never meet.
>>727606949Mackenzie is the key to all this, you know. Because, he's a funnier character than we've had in the games before.
>>727607563>>727616220we were so close
>>727614114I like how Other M has a speaking Samus interacting with the soldiers and they are highly competent.I need play Other M again.
>>727621536>Turns out Adam was the only competent squad leader>Send him on suicide mission to cover up Metrodi breeding program designed to kill all humans.
>>727617650Bad guys won ww2
>>727621536>>727621720>highly competent>sits in a room most of the game and somehow doesn't hear or see what his soldiers are doing despite them having visual and audio feeds directly to the room he's in so he's completely ignorant of The Deleter killing his troops and nearly gets killed him him himself>troops all get killed by The Deleter without any trouble on his part>steals the endgame area from Samus by shooting her in the back when a Metroid is about to eat her then throws his life away like a retard solely so him being an AI in Fusion can work
>>727606949>tendie self insert characteri thank god everyday for making me a purely 2d metroid fan
>>727607563hotel_mario_no.webm
>>727606736Why does he have such a huge nose?
>>727620147
>>727611426but the knight was better than hornet
>>727606736boomers who played the original hates this so who the fuck is nutendo's audience now??
>>727606949Pokemon has better writing than this
>>727606736Bros I'm right at the entrance to the lava pool and I don't have the drive. I played through all the Prime games with hype for this and it is easily the worst game of them all. Should I just tap out and read what happens? God damn.
>>727616089Anon...
>drive all the way around the desert, every way is blocked>faggot is telling me to go to the volcano as I'm pulling up to it>this way is also blocked but I got an upgrade so I can go through the ice area>in order to actually activate this and progress the game I have to drive all the way across the desert, watch a loading screen, go to dude, watch a cutscene, watch another loading screen, and then drive all the way back across the desert
>>727616298There difference is that Myles is ugly as sin and retarded. If they made him somewhat decent looking and capable there wouldn't be that much of an outcry.
>>727616298I never knew what Portal was until I tried it for the first time and that thing already got grating, but given the overall tone of the game and how GlaDos talked too, I figured that was the style. Metroid has never had this style before and was not known for it.
>>727616220>>727621192Nicole ISN'T CANON?
>>727628403I don't get it
>>727606736>Nintendo>AAATheir production values are barely indie tier.
>>727616298Wheatley is the bad guy and is sent into the cosmos in the end.McCucky is your sidekick and you're supposed to be sad when he sacrifices himself.
>>727619262Ron! Itadaki! Riichi, Ippatsu, Full Flush, Dora san.
>>727606949literally designed for 8 year olds with adhd. the action figures i had as a kid were more mature
>>727607462based.
>>727632903>literally designed for 8 year oldsUh yeah Nintendo games are primarily designed for children how have you retards forgot that?
The problem with this "it's designed for children" mindset is I know for a fact I would have probably thought this was weird and cringe when I was a kid.
>>727607338If we go by costs alone, this game has been in development at least 10 years and it also got a restart since the Bamco one was trash. Wouldn't be surprised to learn it's the most expensive game financed by Nintendo at this point, straight up shooting it into AAA category just by that metric.
>>727633421It's the infantilization of it all. NES games were always kid-friendly but they were never so obnoxiously hand-holdy, even when they were easy.
so............win?
>>727633421most nintendo games don't have the most shit, generic and unimmersive dialogue i've ever heard
Nuke commiefornia and excommunicate all Californiods from Austin, Texas as well
>>727633865>user scoresYou have to check and see if they’re just drones who give every exclusive a 10 or not first
>>727634461cope
>>727607129Same reason there's a bunch of annoying, useless, bossy npcs talking to you like you're a child and constantly telling you what to do even though you are literally Samus-fucking-Aran: a bunch of women worked on this game. It has the smell of Karens all over it. I don't even need to see the credits, I already know.
>>727634220based
>>727606736>kills you're
>>727633865>8/10 Nintendo gameIt's shit
>>727606949Is there anybody on this planet who finds tired tropes like this still funny?
>>727621536anthony is the only character in the game that isn't completely retarded what the fuck are you talking about
Based talentless hacks bringing in a new Jar Jar renaissance
>>727635079I'm still buying it
>>727616518Pretty much this. You were never truly alone in Portal 1. Glados was always there, observing and talking to you. Since Portal 2 is going to be longer and lonelier than Portal 1, they decided to add Wheatley to lighten up the mood. Timing was also important. Portal 2 got released in an age where annoying sidekicks and quippy humor was still fresh. Then the MCU, Borderlands, and other games that I cant remember right now, pretty much ruined it.On the other hand, Metroid has established Samus as a lone explorer, since the NES game.There enough light puzzles and exploration to keep you invested at all times in Metroid, so shitty sidekicks are not needed.Portal 2 is 99% of cold puzzles in boring test chambers and old science lab ruins. It can get lonely for some players, so this is why Wheatley exists
>Tendies can't even mod him out of the game
>>727634532I accept your concession
What were they THINKING?
>>727635613I accept your cope session
>>727618227Back when the game came out, people were talking about Cave's bullshit. But most discourse got veered off by reddittor faggots screeching about lemons. But a majority of the oldfags hated Cave's crap but at the same time sorta forgave it because the game itself was really good.
>>727611937He's not white, he's a jewnig mix.
>>727635883>because the game itself was really good.This is the sticking point yeaIt's objectively a great game if you ignore the goofy writing. Which is easy to do.
>>727606949Realistically, /v/, how kino would it be if they do a complete 180 near the end of the game and the silly quirky characters start getting picked off as the game goes on? One gets captured and eaten by a Metroid, or another is taken as ransom by space pirates who threaten to kill him if Samus doesn't show up unarmed(they kill him anyway). Then near the end of it McKenzie learns he has to grow out of the qurik-chungus faggotry and actually becomes a more serious and competent person while still retaining a tad of his samus-geek personality. Or he just dies instantly from a phazon blast or something lmao
>>727636564can i just have a normal game
>>727636564I think this would be cool, it'd be very much in tone with source material like Alien to get to know a team and watch them die off one by one
>>727607563I think any kind of character could work if they were about as silent as Samus. Would turn the annoying shit into funny slapstick.
>>727607563As an enjoyer of both, fuck no. I want Samus to be alone exploring the planet, only checking in with some computer once in a while for the next mission briefing at the most before being allowed to get right back to fucking off to do some more splorin and enemy slaying before finishing the game off by blowing up the planet.
>>727638650NTABut it'd be easy to do tooJust have the character be initially scared of Samus because she's this big killer possibly robot thing in this suit of armorand the character slowly realizes she's acutally a nice person who is fighting the bad monsters. So this nonverbal trust develops where the sidekick is nonverbally like "ok this strange badass walking tank thing is nice, I'll respect it and get behind it"
>>727606949>freeze frame>hey there>bet you are wondering how I got in this situation>well, strap in>bounty hunters, girlbosses, aliens, and a few kicks in the nuts...
>>727616298because portal always started as a comedic game and continuing the comedy is literally just part of the identityMetroid obviously and clearly didn't have this going for itnice disingenuous argument, retard
>>727635484They'll own the McKenzie and be happy.
>>727606736*your
>>727621192where the fuck can I find this, been looking for it for years
>>727638902And if you absolutely must have the npc do your upgrades>pick up missile-shaped pod>npc excitedly approaches and motions to give it to him/her>rushes to a bench, starts smacking it around with a hammer, whatever>rushes back to you and plugs it into your arm>HUD conspicuously shows max missile count going up>”Huh, I guess I bring the weird pods to this npc to get upgrades”Would be a little more charming at least.
>>727606736Why do American love to make characters with helmets take off their shit whenever they are in frame and show the face to talk? Cant they just talk with it closed? It would save time and money and look much better and normal.
>>727607563>if the character were better then would you like it?Given the context, probably not. Though, yes, that would be an improvement.
>>727607563mommy samus escorting a bratty shota would be kino and sell a gorillian copies
>>727617650isn't it absolutly fucking terrific watching everything you loved get turned into absolute shit!?
>>727607563they have one and she's also annoying as fuck
>>727606949Mackenzie amiibo when?
Hey so who is the voice actor for this Lil nerd? He's really good and very talented.
should have been himprove me wrong
is it really that bad? i preordered the game and it's arriving today in like an hour or so lolmy favorite 'rime ludo is echoes if that matters
>>727643503>is it really that bad?No, but that doesn't mean it's great either. It's definitely the weakest Prime, but you'll probably still get enjoyment out of it.
>>727606949Can you kill him?
>>727608869>mfw unlearning the 3 goddesses lore of Zelda when SS comes out
>>727606949+1
>>727643668>can you kill Samus' husbandObviously not retard have you ever played a game of vidya
>>727616298because portal wasn't an age old franchise with certain expectation?
>>727607462LITERALLY me though
>>727617650You need to make your peace with the separation of the Old Nintendo and the New Nintendo. Iwata's passing changed this company.
>>727606736
>>727617650Because businessmen and shareholders only know how to destroy art
>>727643503You deserve everything you get when preordering. Have you been living under a rock?>IMG_1657.pngOf course it's an iToddler phoneposter.
>>727606949i am begging for nintendo fans to open their eyes
>>727644540Characterizing all nintendo fans with prime when not that many people give a shit about 3D metroid in the first place is goofy imo
>>727616298The actual problem is the backseating and needing to go back to him constantly to unlock new weapons (which takes forever because of the desert), which means he gets associated with two of the worst parts of the game. Fix that and he'd be fine.
>>727641432This wasn't actually an American issue this time
>>727641432You owe your entire niggered shitskin existence to America in some shape or for show some respect or kill yourself you ingrate brown shitheel
>>727606949>does https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qt4PE3hx5uw but unironically
>>727644280I'd like to think her freaking out over seing the skull continue to talk is some kind of trauma from Crocomire.
>>727607563Shota would make this game an instant 10/10 HOT /SS/
>>727606949Its unfathomable how much damage joss whedon has done to culture itself.
>>727606736Nobody on /v/ could beat him in a fight
>>727606736>>727606949feels weird that what bothered me more was Samus pain voices when you get hit than this guy in specific, I mean, woman you just 10 hp damage, there is no reason to scream like you are dying?
>>727635484Modding and emulation are for evil PC vegans, remember? Freedom is good only when it involves Nintendo open worlds. Being allowed to modify your own games and hardware is evil. That's the wrong kind of freedom.
>>727606736I don't think he's that annoying at all. Certainly nothing like how the reviewers painted him. He's absolutely a tongue-in-cheek character, and his scan log proves it. Retro knew what they were doing and they pulled it of almost perfectly. The only thing I don't like is that he forcibly opened my map.
>>727641432>look much better and normalUntrue, we humans are genetically predisposed to prefer talking to an actual face. In the real world, this manifests from bikers flipping their visors up when they get stopped by the police (or anyone else) first thing as a sign of respect to viewing people generally as less trustworthy when they wear shades. Seeing a face is always more personal and unless there's a real, current threat that requires you to keep the helmet on, anyone would disengage a visor or take a helmet offUnless of course they are some disrespectful turdie but that's a given
>>727606736WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE A JEW STEREOTYPE? fucking kike self inserts man. god i fucking hate those balding old ass millennials
>everything glows purple>vaginal symbolism everywhere>annoying ass NPCs that never shut upthats all you need to know to figure out who's responsible for this.
>>727616298There's a simple difference:You're supposed to hate Wheatley
>We want more white males in our vidya!>Nooo not like that!
>>727643338grim but true
>>727647832retard
>>727606736>>727606949>fuck all those whiners, he's actually not all that bad
>>727647842That thing ain't white
>>727647064>jew stereotype>millennials>>727645279
>>727616089you realize its YOUR parents generation who are actually responsible for 99% of s oy writing?fucking moron
>>727606736Still buying metroid prime 4snoys are trying to make this game look but but it WILL NOT WORK
>>727647832His posh attitude makes him annoying from the get-go what the fuck are you on about
>>727607101It's fine
>whitegamers are afraid of their own mirrorKEK
>>727650837>white????
>>727650837miles is clearly a jew and no anons talk near as much as this windbag. he has more in common with a character from the office or some other corpo entertainment slop for normies.
>727613021
This speaks volumes.
>>727613021
>>727616298Because Stephen Merchant is (sometimes) funny
>>727606736>>727606949I look like this and say this
>>727606949tendie cultists will defend this and blame journos
>>727650954I still think that dogwater sounds like a poorly translated insult and it makes zoomers sound like ESLs.
>>727606949i have a feeling this is some self insert for a writers masochistic cuck fetishlike some guy is literally jerking off to people calling his character a cuck or a useless retard
>>727652928Anon, most people that sound like ESLs are either extremely foreign or actually just really, really stupid Americans, usually poors and niggersNext time you reading sentence like this keeping in mind that he may be you poor neighbor
>>727654382niggers aren't eslthey don't speak any languages
>>727652928Is it not just a synonym for toilet waterDogs and water kinda have that connection by default, and all
>>727654163Funny you say that. Someone looked up one of the head guys on the dev team and he looks exactly the same as Myles.
>>727655195It's Kensuke TanabeHe's been a producer for the entire Prime series
>>727655793No, this guy.
>>727654798That's kind of my point, it sounds like a literal translation of waste water from another language.
>>727657109It's Kensuke>>727645279
>>727657225its water from a dog's bowl, what's hard to understand?
>>727606949the future is a horrible place and we are stuck in it
Sarge, look, she's doing Morph Ball.
>>727652928>>727654798It's a shortened version of "hotdog water" which is gross. Now you know.
>>727613139That's literally every game for the last decade though.
>>727606949this made me realize we must be better men
>>727657225It follows the normal pattern of english compound words. You wouldn't drink water from a dog's bowl. It's simple.
>>727616298>Why was humor that appeals to 16 year olds okay when you were 16 years old? Why is it SUDDENLY a problem when you're a middle aged man and an unrelated franchise does it over a decade later?
>>727607563>Okay, but what if the character you disliked was completely different, would you like it then?Probably, cause that's the main issue. What's the point of this stupid question?
>>727658518>>727660056It's not hard to understand at all, it just isn't a term that has been used in any dialect of English and has never been needed since better pejoratives have existed for decades if not centuries. Ergo it sound superfluous and like it came from a different culture and language. It's not a difficult concept to grasp.
>>727607563No because there already is a cute girlThere's too much talking
>>727662480Well yeah it's a relatively new term. Those happen all the time."Better pejorative" is nonsense. There's a certain specificity to the term that you might not grasp.>Ergo it sounds superfluousI think you mean "unnecessary."Dumbass.
>>727606949That's hard to watch
>>727606949>Youch! Right in the Metroid Ball! >Awkward...
>>727663450It's a shit term that doesn't really have any practical application. I really don't know why you're so insistant on fighting the fact that it sounds something an ESL would say.>I think you mean "unnecessary."It is unnecessary by virtue of there being sufficient terms which already fulfill its purpose, so no, "superfluous" was quite correct in the manner in which it was used. Retard.
prime 4 is the best metroid game>best graphics>best jokes>no more outdated control schemes>hardly any backtracking>psychic powers!>soundtrack is epicso glad I'm not easily swayed by a picture of a guy with his mouth open lol, but enjoy your anger!
>>727606949Finally Metroid 4 has that spice it apparently needed. That final piece to make everything work.
>>727607563It takes a ton of deliberate effort to make a shota unlikable. He'd still be a blemish on the game's integrity, but if he was cute enough, he would still have value as a /ss/ porn mine.
>>727647183Scifi vaginal Alien iconography is based thoughever. Samus x Scorn when.
>>727607563Everyone hates Chadley from FF7 remake
>>727650954>literal whoYou could try playing the game and forming your own opinion instead of taking it from some eceleb
>>727607129Everything is vulva coded in this game, because the main Hero in this game is a GIRL lolVULVA lol
>>727606736>>727606949Japanese "humor"
>>727606949Yeowch! THAT'S gonna leave a mark!
>>727669224That particular John Halo is a hot girl, if Haloid is to be believed.
>>727669689
>>727611426Yep, fuckups of a concept always have collatoral damage on the concept in general, underwater in monster hunter wasn't even that bad, but people had enough issues with it that they have been too scared to bring it back in a refined form every since
>>727606736Ummmmm Nintendeen sisters, care to explain this?
>>727611670New Baz, tragically too new to be eligible for king of /v/
>>727667569There is plenty of backtracking. Every new weapon makes you cross the empty desert to get Myles to install it. There's also the lock and key abilities like going to flare pool to get the fire shot, needed to enter the ice area, which has the ice shot needed to enter the rest of flare pool
>>727670195Explain what? That you're an idiot for using metacritic?
>>727607338nintendo doesn't do AAA. they don't rely on investors to begin with.
Man, he's getting this much defense and he's a soi faggot. Imagine if he was a quirk chngus ugly woman. Either way, these nip retards can't seem to learn nobody fucking likes Poochies. Just look at how /Wild was killed by an annoying jeet that you can never leave or ignore.
>>727607563>chatterbox instead of competent commandono
>>727616523Can you imagine being this fucking corny of a person... we need gas chambers again. Gas chambers 2.0 even. Let's get it done.XWGAS btw, captcha has a sense of humour today
>>727606949Baffling.
>all the posts saying esl to 'you're'the worst part about newfags is that they don't even get called newfags anymore
>>727606949>>727606736Can’t wait to see you cubies and snoys seethe when Prime 4 outsells every other Metroid game in the series
>>727611426I agree but also I think it's just a matter of devs knowing what they're doing. After Other M everyone assumed Samus should keep her mouth shut but Dread has her speak and screaming her head off and everyone liked it. It is odd for a game with such a heavy NPC presence that she wouldn't talk when she's not actually a silent protagonist. It's not like she's Gordon Freeman. Even Half Life 2 made that man of few words joke to at least acknowledge it.Although considering the writing in this game, maybe it's for the best.
>>727669125Kiss my ass. I ain't playing a game where some chatty dweeb is my sidekick.
>>727607563nerdy girls name is armstrong and she is in the game too and just as annoying and shit as the jew. Shota is for pedophiles and it didnt save mh wilds.
>>727672319>I post shitty memes to trigger local autistsYou aren't even slightly better, fag.
>>727617650Entropy. Everything turns to shit eventually. New good things show up eventually, so don't lose hope.
>>727672617Why do they always have to point out the obvious? This isn't an audio drama. I can see what she's doing.
>>727673429BUT SHE'S DOING THE THING, SARGE!
>Halo Infinite>mid game>best part is the normal companion guy>MP4>great game>worst part is the normal companion guy
>>727617650This comment is very antisemitic.
>>727652928>>727654798>>727658997I always assumed that it was water that a dog drank out of. Like from a dog bowl. Shit's gross
>>727606949Fucking Chadley 2.0 from ff7 rebirth
>>727609440Cope
>>727615506>No one cares about this bullshit I'm about to say.i care. i read it.I kinda see your point, helldivers is kind of at a similar point where it is meant to be a parody of sorts, but you can't make a parody lame and boring
>>727670195What one can call this dude? Snoy? Tendie? Just what?
>>727643503>preorderDon't do this.Don't ever do this.
Did I just do that didn't I? With my freaking MIND? HAHA!
>>727606949certified metroid moment
>>727606949I laughed
>>727616298>UHM HOW COME THIS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GAME IN A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GENRE FROM A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT COMPANY WRITTEN IN A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT WAY WORKS??!?!?
>>727648953vinny is unironically right tho
>>727606949>oof, right in the energy tanks, that's gonna leave a mark
>>727672567 Lmao yeah god forbid the devs let me shut him up for five goddamn minutes. Every time I take two steps it’s "Oh wow, did you see that?!" YES, I HAVE EYES, YOU TURD. It’s like they played Navi and thought, “what if we made her talk more and be more smug?”
>>727606736I love it, Metroid fans had to wait for years and were so close.Now they get their game but it turns out someone spit in their food.
>>727606736So, what's the hate for? The guy just looks ugly? I don't play metroid games.
>>727640934https://exhentai.org/g/1017448/4ca68f14ff/
So, we should just kiss that isolated feeling goodbye? The one felt during Prime?
>>727606736This guy looks like your average Metroidvania fan anyway
>>727617650Normies
>>727606949>you guys thinking what I'm thinking?>*Jumpcuts*>THIS WASN'T AT ALL WHAT I WAS THINKING!!!
