All are welcome here.Previous: >>7863731
i hate everything ,i only love myself
One of the hardest pills to swallow is that she didn't need me, she just needed somebody. I don't know how to leave her alone. It's destroying my life and I am to blame for it. She had feelings for me at one point but I didn't reciprocate. Now hers have dulled and mine have ignited. It's a cliché, but what I wouldn't give to go back in time.
Hit me with a song lyric that makes you feel something.
I'm melancholic, because I have no motivation for study my exams, and I prefer get it to work better at old age for my futur family.
>>7894568Lyrics don't usually do much for me, i'm more the kind to get goosebumps from instruments buuutPorter Robinson's 'Sweet Time' hits me like a fucking train"But you don't live foreverYour mother will one day bring you homeAnd it feels so stupid, 'cause I wasn't scared of this beforeBut since I have met you, I don't wanna die no more"My gf gives me so much want for life i'd really be lost without her. Not in like a codependent way, we're very much our own people, but man she gives me hope when I feel like there is none
>>7893899lonely and anxious>havent made any new friends in 15 years>only hung out with and talked to 3 people in the last 4 years>known them for 10+ years>still scared to lose them>want to ask them to hang out more>want to share/say more with them>scared they wont like me anymore and leave me>asked one of them if they want to play a video game with me>they said yes, on thursdayit was so hard to ask but if i can't do things like that my life will only get worse.
Feeling pretty tired. Almost had a meltdown at work. A lot of past trauma hit me all at once out of nowhere. I started feeling everything at once. My mom dying, my dad not being there for me, my family not really being there either. It took me a while to pull out of that. But I work with my best friend and talking to him helped a lot. It took my mind off things. I just have to accept that I've had a shit hand in life and not dwell on it. I still think I should go back to therapy to try and sort through some of the baggage that I have.
Feeling lost, unfocused and tired. But I'm itching to change.
>>7893899just turned 22 years old and feel like I've completely missed out on life for the past couple years. I've never had a girlfriend never went to any parties I've never done anything I think is truly noteworthy and yet I'm so afraid of the rest of my life holds for me I just wanna go to sleep and never have to wake up. But even still I look at those who have the things that I feel so terrible for never experiencing and they seem almost worse off because of it. Like it really is true that carnal happiness is completely fleeting and meaningless. Perhaps the only true joy is the kind you have in the moment and if thats the case developing some form of passionate hobby maybe the only thing worth doing in this life
we barely talked to each other but i miss himi wonder if he misses me too
I wish she looked at me the way she looks at him.
Lots of things Like the ever constant thoughts of being a failure at lifeAnd dreaming about goals that are pretty impossible (pic related to some of the dreams) Not exactly wallpaper but it's at least wallpaper sized pic
>>7893899your mindset really dictates your life, if you're in highschool and you're reading this make sure you get a part time job, learn how to balance work and your life, take breaks whenever you feel overwhelemed and write down what you need to do and how to do it.
Trying to heal some things, feeling really lonely, havent interacted with anyone apart from my family in a month
>>7896610You saved a justingod edit hahahahaha
It's petty, but I felt hurt that my best friend of fifteen years didn't know my birthday.
Objectively things are going better than ever, I have a steady job that I like and which affords me ample time to work on my hobbies. I'm married too so I'm not spending every night alone anymore. But I'm still not really happy. I'm coming off my 2 days off and I spend both whole days just sitting in front of my computer just like I always have. I grew up imagining this point in my life - 31, married, gainfully employed and pictured me doing...something different. Being more content. Don't get me wrong, I'm content, but I'm still...listless? Not sure of my true calling or my real place. I don't feel "done" the way I thought I would. There has to be something more than this.
I've just taken my first serious job, I have a relationship that's been the first one in a long while that feels right and that I truly believe can last me my whole life, I've begun making plans to move out of my parent's home finally... my whole life is at a turning point and for the first time it feels like I'm going to be a real person. I just need to make that first leap, I've yet to feel confident enough to do so... the journey ahead feels long and mysterious... I know I need to do this, but I'm just trying to work up the stomach to commit. Because once I've left home and entered that forest I'll have no way back, so I sit at the edge in anticipation.
My deep trauma therapy is making me realize how fucked up I actually am.
It wasn't all that long ago, a few years maybe, that this board was a sanctuary. I could scroll through /wg/ on my laptop at school and not worry about all the shit that was mostly contained to /b/ and /pol/. I used to come here to relax, look at beautiful pictures and art, and hang out with others that just wanted some positivity and respite from the normal baseline chaos of the internet. I guess nothing can last forever, but I just wish I could go back a few years and scroll through one last time, hiding from the rain in a warm room full of people. I've tried, actually. I've tried hard, but every /wg/ archive I find only goes back to 2020-ish. I only have two wallpapers left from those days, this is one of them. I hope I find some of the others, but nothing will turn time backward.
>>7895012Try to use talking to strangers as an opportunity to try new things and increase your social skills in a situation where the worst thing that can happen to you is that you get a weird look. It'll help you interact with those you already know and help you make new friends after the failure period is over.
>>7896809I understand where you're coming from. I started making these threads last year because I was tired of all the political/racial shit flooding every board. For the most part, these threads are friendly and I try to make everybody feel welcome if I can. Nothing can replace the internet of yore, I know. As for archives, try these:https://archive.alice.al/wg/https://archive.wakarimasen.moe/wg/https://archived.moe/wg/Glad you posted ITT, pal.
I think life is good. I'm kinda broke, but get by and work whenever I can. I'm kinda lonely because no gf, but my friends are always there.I'm gonna love the shit out of this life, and hopefully myself.
How the fuck do you find motivation? I can't get myself past the first hurdle of anything I do and I know it's a problem but I can't force myself to solve it.
>>7896819>I started making these threads last yearI'm glad you did, I think they help anons. I made these threads a few years ago as well but drifted away from posting for a while. I bookmarked the threads I made so I'll share them here for some history. Maybe someone will find it interestingHere's my first iteration of these threads in early 2019.>>7383943I got the idea from seeing a similar thread on >>>/lit/ and wanted to bring it here. I always enjoyed thinking and writing, and I thought it'd be fun to share related wallpapers. It'd be a unique thread contrasted against the usual terseness here and it could provide an outlet for others as well, which I tried to explicitly encourage with the thread's title: "What's On Your Mind?"I wanted to write and share a wall every day, but I also wanted to encourage others to share their own musings too. After a few days I was concerned the length of my posts was discouraging others from posting, but eventually the thread gained traction and surpassed 300 replies.Here's my second iteration in late 2019.>>7501745I didn't want a long OP to discourage any anons from posting, so instead of having the prompt in the title I decided to make it the OP itself.Fun historical fact: after this thread died, there were a lot of attempts by others to make more but jannies kept deleting them. I can understand that "What's on your mind?" alone isn't relevant enough to the board. It's smart that your threads explicitly ask people to post walls so they're not off-topic.Here's the last of these threads I made in 2020.>>7621783I dumped some walls at the start to fend the jannies off and thankfully it worked.I know you didn't ask for my opinion but I'd drop the "All are welcome here." It gives me an infantilized "safe space" kind of vibe, and these threads have always been chill and welcoming already. But that's just my two cents.
>>7896872Great post. I had been away from the board for a number of years so I'm glad you still have the archives. >I'd drop the "All are welcome here." It gives me an infantilized "safe space" kind of vibeI meant it more to say that anybody can post here regardless of shame or guilt, though I see what you're saying. I know I've previously felt like I don't belong a lot of places. Wanted to make it clear that anybody can post in these threads and get whatever they need off their chests.
>>7896823based picture, ty anonhope you get a girlfriend, you sound cool
I want to be able to cry. I want to be the person with his head on the shoulder, with the other person offering reassurances. "Hey now, it's going to be okay. We can get out of this. Things will get better. Let it out, it's okay. I love you." I want to be the one asking for something, for the help that isn't always just kind words. I want a day where I can consider my own feelings rather than someone else's. I want to not be ashamed of myself every time I get emotional. I want to not feel like I have to cry alone. I want to not have to be a man.I can hear my father's voice in my head. "Stop crying. Men don't cry. Get it under control and get over it." He's been dead for almost twenty five years and still, those words hang heavy on me. In the other ear is my mother contradicting everything. "It's okay to show emotions. There's nothing wrong with crying. That doesn't dictate the kind of man you are."I don't know how to deal with the weight bearing down on me. I want to not have to be strong all the time. I'm ashamed and I'm sorry.
>>7894212LMAO exact opposite for me. Love everything and hate myself.
people who I thought were good friends turned on me during my worst ever mental health crisis in which I already wanted to kill myself. it's a miracle I'm alive
I want to go back so fucking bad. I don't even want to change anything. I wish so fucking bad. I hate it now. Everything is so fake and gay. I want to go back before the internet was a big deal. I want to go back to when nerds were actually nerds and not ironic larpers. I want to go back when you could spend a lazy hot afternoon watching steins gate. I miss going on youtube and watching videos of people just fucking around or talking about their passions. I miss it all. Its all so inhuman and corporate now. I just want to live it. Real life with real human friends. I wish everything would just go back or slow down. I'm so tired. I just want to drink my tea in the afternoon sun with the feeling that everything is going to be alright.
I've never been in love in 30 years (not to mention kissing, sex and relationship). I missed the opportunity and it hurts.
>>7897066me too bro
Met my old lover in the grocery storeSnow was falling Christmas EveI stole behind her in the frozen foodsAnd I touched her on the sleeveShe didn't recognize the face at firstBut then her eyes flew open wideShe went to hug me and she spilled her purseAnd we laughed until we criedTook her groceries to the checkout standFood was totaled up and baggedWe stood there lost in our embarrassmentAs the conversation draggedWent to have ourselves a drink or twoBut couldn't find an open barBought a six pack at the liquor storeAnd we drank it in her carWe drank a toast to innocenceWe drank a toast to nowTried to reach beyond the emptinessBut neither one knew howShe said she'd married her an architectWho kept her warm and safe and dryShe would have liked to say she loved the manBut she didn't like to lieI said the years had been a friend to herAnd that her eyes were still as blueBut in those eyes I wasn't sure if ISaw doubt or gratitudeShe said she saw me in the record storesAnd that I must be doing wellI said the audience was heavenlyBut the traveling was hellWe drank a toast to innocence We drank a toast to now Tried to reach beyond the emptiness But neither one knew how We drank a toast to innocenceWe drank a toast to timeReliving in our eloquenceAnother auld lang syneThe beer was empty and our tongues were tiredRunning out of things to sayShe gave a kiss to me as I got outAnd I watched her drive awayJust for a moment I was back at schoolAnd felt that old familiar painAnd as I turned to make my way back homeThe snow turned into rain
>>7893899Eyyy my friend's photo is the OP, very coolhere's one I took all the way back in 2015. we were watching mad max fury road at an old drive in theatre and it was awesome, the concession stand building hadn't been updated since who knows when aside from that soda fountain.I'm turning 26 soon and I think the 18 year old me that took this pic would be impressed that I even made it this far. part of me is incredulous that my life is going this well despite everything and the other part that thinks for more than a second still wishes I was dead. It feels like men my age are just getting the short end of the stick at every turn, and there's only so many short sticks I can hold before I have to burn this bundle of fags. all I can do is wish all you brothers out there to stay strong
I'm so sick and tired about hearing how disadvantaged various people are in our country. Even the poorest of the poor in white West Virginia and darkest Detroit are living better than these people ever will. The folks that lived in this house waved every day and sold us falafels, and, despite 6 years of occupation, seemed pretty damned content with life.
>>7897714When I saved that picture it was after reading anon's story about a falling out with a friend. Are you the anon? If so, I have been thinking of you and your story, pal. How are you doing? I remember being moved when I saw your image and read the story that accompanied it.
>>7897742Yeah that was me. when I say that is my friend's pic, its a pic he took of me and that friend. Funny enough he came to visit recently since we have started getting along better. It's rare that you grow distant with someone and they suddenly come back into your life like nothing happened, I'm glad that we still talk and now it feels so long ago that we didn't. thanks for keeping me in your thoughts anon, hope you are doing well too(pic is just another from his camera roll that he developed)
>>7897745Glad to hear you're still upright and that it got patched up with your friend. Love the photo, saved.
>>7894568The Sun, The Moon, The StarShine less brightly with you so farI never knew sorrowtil you asked me to follow my heartFor all the tales I toldAnd these whispers of silver and goldI'd throw them all awayTo gaze on your face once moreÆther Realm, "The Sun, The Moon, The Star"
Im slowly falling into a worse and worse mental state, im almost never happy, i almost never have energy for anything. Sometimes i really just want to give up. But i cant. I havent been able to have a decent rest in a while, i haven't been able to have a good day. Everything feels like a drag.
>>7897835This is the same poster, i forgot to post a pape so here
>>7893899I am momentarily bored and in the long-term, depressed. By all statistics my life is going great compared to the average American. I have a job that pays well at a relatively prestigious company. But I compare myself to others, and most of my friends have surpassed me and have even more success and I feel unsatisfied.Of course, I'm not in any relationship either.Even though I'm still young, I'm afraid that I will always end up being a very mediocre person. I'll probably make as much as my parents, live in an okay house and drive an okay car. But I always thought I could surpass my parents a lot. Not become a billionaire with a private jet, but live life very comfortably. A lot of my friends are able to do this, but I'm starting to think I just don't have the intelligence or attractiveness to achieve my goals.
>>7897835>>7897836Do you feel like you are unsatisfied in some portion of your life? Like romance, social, or career? Are you doing particularly bad financially? I get what you mean, in thinking, what's the point of it all? whenever you try to muster up energy to do something. >>7897066Yeah I don't understand modern humor. I liked when things seemed to be more genuine. Not ironic randomness everywhere. >>7896936At the end of the day, you should do what you think will make your life better. If crying to let out your emotions is needed, then do it. However, I will say, crying in the presence of women is very detrimental; it's a sad reality that men who cry are looked down upon. >>7896735I am jealous of you, but I wish you the best of luck. What you describe is where I want to be. >>7896721This is exactly how I feel except I don't have a relationship. I've always thought having a significant other would make me feel content, but it seems for you even that is not enough to make you feel fulfilled.
Can't shake the feeling that I'm not enough for my husband. He's such an amazing person and he's been absolutely essential this year, I couldn't have made it this far without him after a bad injury, losing my job and my sister dying; he was there for me through every second of the worst of it and never complained, never lamented how hard our life has been, never hesitated to tell me he loves me with the same glimmer in his eye as when we first started dating. And yet, I can't escape the frustrating and panic-inducing sensation that eventually, he's going to get tired of me and decide his time is better spent elsewhere. And then the very idea that a part of me is worried he'd abandon me makes me feel even more guilty, it just feeds on itself. My worry about our future is inversely proportional to our actual circumstances; in early 2021, we were dealing with some horrible shit. Close friend dying, losing our house, my psycho cousin trying to kill me, getting in a car wreck that beat the shit out of me, and through all of it there was this feeling like we were two swashbucklers just taking what the world had to throw at us and making it work, and never once I doubted our future, and now, technically speaking, things are so much better and stable and yet I lay awake some nights with scenarios playing out in my head about him breaking the news to me over breakfast that he's done with me and wants to break it off, and the idea of that scenario breaks my fucking heart. Every time I voice these concerns he always has sweet words and a kiss that make me feel better, but the irrational fear is still there. I just love him so fucking much and I don't want to screw this up. The last 15 years of my life are an ugly chronicle of ruined relationships, but this is the best one I've ever had and I absolutely cannot let it slip away like the others. He's the best thing that's ever happened to me and it's not even close.
>>7898461I have shared your feelings of inadequacy many times. Even when we're reassured those thoughts can come creeping back. You trust him, right? If he's telling you you're enough, take him at his word. Hard as it is, try. Just try. Reverse the situation for a second and imagine it was he who was telling you he thought he was inadequate. You'd be offering that same reassurance. I hope things work out for you, pal.
I am so absolutely in love with my ex, and I have no clue what to do. I graduate from college in a week, and I've been with my current gf for almost a year and half. This ENTIRE time I've been thinking of her, of my ex. it's gotten so bad these past two weeks that I literally can't think straight
>>7899434That's why you get a partner without exes.
for a split second I saw a girl I hadn't seen about 4 years ago. we smiled at each other and said hello as best we could as the bus was taking me in the opposite direction. I managed to find her social media but she hasn't let me into the chat yet.now that's not the problem; I'm looking for a girl she might know who I guess was in love with me a long time ago, but I was too dumb to give a shit about it.I lived with her not realizing she was amazing and all the memories are coming back now. I just wanna find her and talk to her now, no matter what she's become.
>>7894568iiiiima creep ima weirdoooO what the hell am i doing here i dont belong heeeeeere
I'm worried the Nationals are going to trade Juan Soto. I was already pretty sad when they flipped Turner to the Dodgers. But I don't think they can win with the team they have now, so no point in paying Soto the big bucks just to stay on a sub-80 win team. So maybe trading him for a huge haul would be better in the long run. Idk, that's just what's been on my mind lately.
>>7894386The only way you can move forward is to stop clinging to the past. It will be hard, but that will change if you stick to it
Then when I came home that nightTo lie awake in bedI thought of that old gypsyAnd the words that she had saidAnd now I see with due respectThe more we learn the worse we getSo if you feel you've no regretsGo have your fortune read
>>7895282I feel you, I haven't done anything remarkable in my life and I know everything I do is just a waste of time, there is no meaning. Even though I try to do things that make/show me who I am.It's difficult to explain. In one word: just live!Or go to therapy
I'm still in love with my best friend since 6 years ago. Even I had been in a relationship lately. I still like her a lot.
>In-between jobs>been single for a few years>living alone>still fighting my old selfBut>have a great family>supportive friends>basic needs met>still feeling blessed>trusting more and more in God's love and forgivenessIt gets better bros. Don't give up
>>7900506>trusting more and more in God's love and forgivenessGod doesnt care about me.
Feel about me the way I feel about you.
When you knew that it was overYou were suddenly awareThat the autumn leaves were turningTo the color of her hair
>>7895282For me, its the people, and the goodness I create when Im with them.
>>7897736In an ironic and abstract way, I envy them. Crisis and catastrophe dignifies the human spirit.
>>7898461>Can't shake the feeling that I'm not enough for my husbandThe only way you can put those feelings down is to make damn sure you appreciate him. And make damn sure that there is no doubt in his mind, no evidence to convict you of anything less than that. Go out of your way to make gestures that are more than verbal expressions of appreciation. The best way to "keep" a man is to vindicate his sacrifices.
>>7900681You would be very uncomfortable if you could fathom just how infatuated with us he truly is.
>>7893899I ran into this girl I used to be in a bible study group with. I never made any advances because it seemed in appropriate and shes a few notches out of my league, but that group dissolved a while ago and I ran into her at the gym I frequent. She approached me and we caught up. It was surreal, just how great I felt after. Like, eat enough, hydrate, and exercise consistently sort of good. Bumping into this chick really forced me to give a shit about myself, almost as if I feel that god will reward me with her presence again if I keep this up. Its rare that I meet someone like her. Im just gonna doesnt afraid of anything the next time I see her and ask her out. If I get shot down I think I will be able to live myself knowing that I at least had the balls to ask her out.
>>7893899i am just tired, that kind of tired a sleep won't cure it , can't find a way to fix it. >>7897066same anon, but we can't turn back time
>>7893899I'm so autistic I can't even have proper conversations like eveyone do and I will most likely be forever alone because of that, without ever experiencing love in my life.The only girls who try to get me are gold diggers who are only interested in my money and career, they see me as an easy target because of my autism but I would rather be alone than with them.I want someone who loves me and enjoys my company but autism makes it hard to express myself and connect with girls.
>>7901965yo I'm >>7895282 coming back after this thread resurfaced and this is 100% true. I don't really have a clear social network atm but I came to this realization after a long period of deep introspection. gotta create joy and happiness in others and it will rebound back to you. Good luck everyone gonna make the most of the early 20s I have left. What you think becomes your reality, we all gonna make it if we just believe n shit lmao.
>>7901970asking her out is the only optionif she says no, atleast you know she doesn't see you that way so you move on.if you don't ask her out, you'll always be wondering "what if"
We’re so desperate for meaning and adventure that we’ll surround ourselves with fantasy. Telling people you’re going to do something creates a false sense of progress. We’ll spend decades repeating sound in lieu of substance until we become a hollowed-out version of our ideal self.
>>7902355When was the last time you went to a place with trees without a phone? Or laid out and looked at the stars?
>>7900500Rip that bandaid off. Invite her to activities and dinner etc and let her know. Sitting for years in ambiguity will kill you.
>>7893899somewhere between hope and dreadthe road is long and the pathway dark
>>7902598>>7902914TheseNothing hurts worse than regretting doing nothing
>>7903155I came here for a new background, but found wisdom. i too had this problem, i just ripped that bandaid of and told her that i wanted her to break my heart again and tell me the reality of what we was. She no longer saw me as someone she was interested in, thus it was a bit easier for me to move on knowing she didnt want anything else with me.
Why do i want to break down my life of luxury? i feel the luxuries of my life are keeping me tied to a life where im not free or chasing what makes me happy. i Own an appartment, i made my own dream bathroom, people envy me, and yet here i am wanting to get rid of it all. I want freedom more than luxury. This appartment ties me to a job where i work for another mans success. I need the job to keep my life of luxury together. I hate beeing alone, yet im a loner, i have several friends, but i choose to suffer. I hate the reality of my current life, thus i wana take the jump, sell the appartment, reduce my living standard, and live a life thats more fullfilling. Luxury dosnt bring you happines, living life and experiencing it on your terms is what brings you joy.
How are you doing this evening, anons?
I wish I could help each and every one of you.
>>7904702I dont have any faith in myself nor God. My prayers are unanswered.
>>7903366Take a poor man's advice. Be happy you have that life. You don't want to live the life some of us live.
I plan on moving countries soon to go to another continent but I feel so panicky and like it's going to be too late soon. I'm currently waiting on documents. I feel like it's the end times and shit's going to get real bad soon. I have to constantly calm myself down so I don't have an anxiety attack about it. I don't belong here. I never have. This culture is not mine and this system is cruel and sick. I had a really fucking bad last couple of years, where I tried to make something of myself and the system just kicked me in the teeth. I'm done here. I hope this country burns to the fucking ground along with every rich boomer. Please don't reply to me with your opinions about whatever country you think I'm in, or telling me that I'm ungrateful or whatever, I don't want this to turn political. On a good note, I think threads like this are the last good things left on 4chan
>>7903366>i Own an appartmentlucky you
>>7904707i felt like this for ten years, but this year i feel something tugging at my heart. it might be ocd, it might be the holy spirit. i'm trying to explore things again.anyway, I hope things work out for you, in whatever form that may be.
Tired>Work is a pain in the ass>But if I don't get extra hours, rents a bitch>Still haven't paid off a 3K debt I owe>GF asked what I wanted to do in my life and I have no answer
>>7905242heres a non /w/ pape since im high and forgot where i was for a second
>>7893899making my gf watch taxi driver tonight as punishment, and she laughed her ass off at this scene.she's a keeper for sure.
got home from a 11 hour day of working in the rain a few days ago and just started crying while eating beef stroganoff. felt fine all day but it balled my eyes out. gotta make a change it think lmao
Blagged about it here:>>7905182>>7905183
>>7904758>>7904766OP again here.I am happy that i have this life. its a nice foundation, considering im only 24. But yet this life has a grasp on me that i dont enjoy.. daily i dream of going small, get a tiny house or something. something that wont cost me as much each month, that will free me from this loop im currently in. I wana start bussineses, take risks, give people a better life with jobs that i can create and other shit. all of those things will be possible once i cut out this appartment and free myself from this expensive luxury i got into way to early alone.
>>7903068This is fantastic, where is it from?
>>7906077Wondered the same thing. Not showing up on any of the usual reverse image search sites.
>>7894568God damn the sunGod damn the light it shines and this world it shows
>>7906105SauceNao saves the day:https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/86011816
>>7894568i ain't a killer but don't push me
i miss coming home from school and have nothing to worry about and just play minecraft all day
>25 and still in college>all of my cousins and friends have already their life set families,kids,etc. >still living with my parents>failed this one subject so Im delayed onceagain>supposed to graduate this year but got delayed to 2023 I'm 25 and still in college(engineering) I don'thave anyone to talk to with because my matesfailed their subjects this last sem and i can feelthat they wouldn't make it far. i feel old. I feel like that I'm behind everyone, i know i shouldn't compare myself with other's timeline but stillI feel like I'm left behind, (pardon my english)
>>790617025 is nothing anon, life always feels the same. The only thing that changes is you have more experience. Your friends are your friends because they like you and support you regardless, if not, they are only classmates. Be careful about who you compare yourself to, and keep your head up. Better late than never. <3
>>7902476find an autistic girl, or maybe a girl with aspergers or something neurodivergent. Typically they’ll love you to the core because they are ignored or objectified by other men.
>>7903366do it, fuck it. if what you’re doing does not make you better/happy/honest/empathetic/human it is a waste of your life. Material things are just that, things. I’m poor before anyone says anything, don’t chase wealth. Chase the life you want fuck all that other stuff
>>7896809i opened this computer back up like a time capsule from 2 years ago, i could look around for old pictures?
>>7896809sorry meant to type 4 years ago instead of 2
>>7906170Sorry to hear that anon. I was in a similar situation just like you. Studied CS, watched all my friends and other peers graduate, get their degrees even masters. And I failed to catch up to them, stayed behind. I went a 3 yrs program 6 yrs - for 2 whole years didn't literally step foot in the collage building. Watching others being successfull, completing their goals, moving forward, really depressed me. Went on a booze and drug abuse, constantly. But my situation was different then theirs, I had to work two jobs with the school only to pay rent and eat food. That's when it hit me : we're all chasing the same goals, but our circumstances are different, so it's pointelss to compare ourselves to others, because there's always gonna be someone better, smarter, more successful than yourself, ALWAYS. That's when I stopped browsing social media where everyone posts themselves in brightest light only, and I've read "The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck" by Mark Menson I think. And it further changed my perspective on things, helped me get out of the loop that I was stuck in. Quit one job, focused on uni only and a year later finished it and got my degree. Aced all the last exams I had and got the highest score on my final paper - it was an awesome feeling, not because others will know now that I too have succeded but the fact that I've proved it to myself above all and everyone else. Now I have a job in my field, it's nothing amazing but at least I'm not bartending anymore and I'm doing what I like. Remember anon, you don't have to be smart to finish uni, you just have to be persistant !Good luck to you ! Hang in there mate ! PS Didn't upload a pepe, I have a story of my own which I'll post later.
Okay, here goes. >be me 25, fresh outta collage, meet a single mom, go on a few dates, hit it off>few months in I move in with her and her boys> after a few months, I proposed, she said yes> I get it it was really fast, but we've made a promise to one another - "All or nothing" - so I went all in, and had no problem with that, was actually happy and at piece with myself, getting along with her and kids both, finally feel safe, accepted, like I belong >fast forward 3 years, a few months back she gives me the ring back "anon I'm not happy anymore, with myself, with you, but don't get me wrong it's not you, and I'm not breaking up, just giving you back the ring so you can give it to me again, when things are better" >for me, returning the ring ment that she wasnt 100 % sure, for whatever reason >don't know if it will ever be the same again >afraid that if we go trough this, and get married anyways that soon enough we'll start to resent and hate each other for not letting go and trying to find happines elseware>afraid if the fundation of our whole commitment gets destroyed that the marriage is bound to crash and burn, just a matter of time>confronted her - told her that if she's not happy I'll leave, and maybe then, when we're both apart from each other we'll realise both our issues and the issues of the other person and option 1 : we'll realise, talk it out, get back on track; or option 2 : we'll realise that it really wasn't ment to be and move on to find happines with someone else >meanwhile she's working all the time, we barely see each other >staying home with the kids - taking care of them and the house etc...>soon kids will leave for the summer and we'll be alone, that's when I'm planing to tell her that I'll look for a place and leave>I'll miss her, and the kids too, but I don't think she'll prevent me or them from seeing eachother>I know we still love each other deeply - but sometimes it just isn't enough>hope that Im making the right choice
>>7893899Life's been a warzone right now, pic related in a way. I've struggled to overcome alcohol, porn, staying up late/sleeping in late, slacking on college work, etc. and I want to do better. Life is gonna keep knocking me down, but holy shit am I gonna get back up each time.
>>7906384I'm the anon who posted the "Jacob Wrestles God" wallpaper: I'm a bit younger than you (20 yr old), but my advice is to take the opportunity of the kids being away to not simply walk out, but truly use that time to talk things through. It sounds like you've made a real connection with her and I'd hate to see you throw that away when there's a chance of still salvaging things. You say that you both still love each other. Well love should be fought for, if it's honest and committed. Once the kids are gone, give things another shot. Maybe until then you can move into a friend's house/apartment or go back home for a bit, something like that. The distance may actually help, but bottomline my advice would be to not give up just yet. Hang in there, anon.
>>790617022 here anon,I flunked out of CS and EE so don't sweat itJust barely clawed my way out of a B.S in physics which I ended up hating by the end.Thankfully my school accepted me to stay an extra year and to do a masters in Econ which I like way more, jobs have still been kinda scarce, but it'll get better for both of us anon
>>7893899only being alone can solve my issues right now but its too hard
>>7893899I have the pressure of, what feels like, the world bearing down on me.My family wrote me off when i was 18 (25 now) i did a stint in the army and realised it was a shitholeSo now im doing my bachelors in law and all of a sudden the whole family has come out of the woodworknot giving support but expecting me to complete it.They've told all the relatives and friends of the family and i get calls on the daily, mainly them asking me legal questions.maybe i'm being ungrateful but i feel like the only reason my family would accept me is because i now how 'worth' to them.I went from being a kid, kicked out of home regularly, shouted at for just existing, emotionally abused by my father to now being the almost 'fabled hero'part of me just wants to stop the degree and become a recluse just to get away from any expectation placed on me.Im sure other people have it worse though.
>>7906486Sad to hear about your family situation anon. You really had it rough. The thing with family is, we can't pick it, you get what you get. My relationship with my family isn't anything special but I didn't have a bad childhood. In time I've accepted that they are what they are and just focused on my own life. For your law degree, maybe you should ask yourself if you're doing it for them or for yourself ? If you really enjoy it and see yourself somewhere in the field in the future maybe you should keep pursuing it and go trough with it. If nothing else, when you finish don't do favours to family and their friends "pro bono" give them a price :) maybe then they'll respect you in a different way. Bottom line, whatever you're doing do it for you nobody else. Hang in there anon!
>>7906441Thanks for the advice man, appreciate it! I gotta admit the tought did cross my mind, I think I still have a month or so untill the time comes and I'll see what to do then. In the meantime I'll try my best to hang in there and keep it all togather as much as I can. Cheers
thought i was better than this
Mulholland Drive makes me cry.
>>7906515thanks anon, that helped a bit.
I realize I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life by marrying my wife. Have to fight to keep my self-esteem up.
it's annoying not being able to talk to a girl for fear of rejection
Not sure if online uni classes will do me any good. In fact, not sure if uni in general will really benefit me as much as my parents said it will
Being SHIT at math is really fucking me up
I think saving my wallpaper collection on Google Drive has made their quality worse
>>7906835either that or I saved some pretty bad papes
I wanted to have the full gf experience, but I don't have a house to take her and I can't go to her place either. Guess we'll see each other in bars and such until I move out - which I don't want to do really, not because of ONLY this. I'll break up with her someday and never find another one until I have a house.
>>7904707/ourguy/ Terry Davis once said about prayer "You get out what you put in." You may have to entertain God with something he's asking of you before he does what you ask of him.>>7906664You're only as good as you see yourself, Anon. Learning to love the self is step #0 when it comes to perfection.>>7906777University is a scam, and online classes are no better. What are you trying to learn? Buy/yo-ho-ho some books and study it yourself if you can.>>7906905Enjoy your time together wherever you can. You're likely not going to own a house in this lifetime, sorry to say. Take her to a park, go stargazing, walk aimlessly around the city. Get out and love the world and each other while you still have the time.
Making the world better could be so easy if we all just kind of tried a little bit, but we dont. Including myself
>>7893899>all are welcome hereexcept FAGGOTS
>>7906440Anyone have this, but with the message "Thy angel told him to stop hitting thyself. But it was no match, as the angle was hitting him with his own hands."Or something like that.
>>7907856Hey my life matters!
I am really curious to see what happens this weekend when I try shrooms. "the Golden Teacher" it's called.
>>7908136I hope you dissociate and get permanent schizophrenia
>>7896721Hope you get well soon. Changes are necessary and cool to work with.
>>7908136I hope you have a fun time time and use that energy to foster a fulfilling future.
>>7896843The shitty thing is that you need motivation to build motivation. I was in this position myself and your worry right now is that very motivation you need. If you were completely incapable of anything then you wouldn't have gone out of your way to type that comment. Thats the spark you need to build the fire of motivation with, don't let it go out or there may be no way back.
trying to focus on the good and ignore the bad