Thread #8 (still no name - suggestions appreciated).All are welcome here.Previous: >>7949081
/wg/ is one of the only boards left untouched by shitposting.it's special, pure, and rare, like a gleaming diamond, or a snow-white colt.we must protect it.
/wg/ and /wsg/ are the only boards that I think actually offers new contentall the other boards are just full of repetitive garbage.
https://youtu.be/0SL4_DsUlH8I very much like this song, it makes me happy
>>7995581Thanks for sharing, man.
>>7995491I see what you mean, it is really nice and refreshing to see a place that seems untouched in a lot of ways. I hope we can maintain it like this, there's some really cool stuff.
>>7995491>>7995503Glad you guys are here.
/wg/ and /wsg/ are my comfort boards, I am finishing up medical school. Downloading papes and seeing people share the papes they are proud of or bring them comfort helps me relax and unwind. I hope they stay untarnished.
I am depressed beyond belief, every thought hurts. 4chan used to be an escape, especially random lol /b/ threads. But it's turn to shit, don't know if just retards posting, bots or both but /wg/ and /wsg/ are the only places I enjoy now.I'm tired of thinking about my past, the people I cared for and loved are now gone. I'm tired of being reminded I had the world ahead of me and I've made nothing of it.
>>7996254I agree, so much.
>>7996663
>>7996662
brainfog & laziness. Life has passed me by, even though I'm very young. All day doing nothing, all alone. It doesn't even hurt. Not long till a blow my brains out.
>>7996665
>>7996666I know that feel, bro. On top of all that, I have been in surgery for a brain aneurysm which went well, but the brain fog has gotten worse since. fml.
>>7996669
>>7996666If you're young, you can change the course of your life bro.
Thinking about what to think about
>>7996662Get into reading, Anon.Wish you all the very best in life, hope you'll thrive someday.
I'm happy. Like, not jumping up and down, but a strange, contented happy. That said, I'm tired. My soul is tired, which sounds so over dramatic, but I don't know how else to phrase it. Something inside of me feels old, old and exhausted. It doesn't detract from how I'm feeling, but at the end of each day I feel it, like an echo I'm hearing from somewhere far away. Maybe it's my OCD or PTSD acting up, maybe it's some part of me I've tried to ignore. All that said, I am happy though. And you have to celebrate those little victories, right?
>>7996666>>7996669>brainfogGet the coof jab did you both? Did you have more than one jab? Which version(s) of the jab did you get?>lazinessas for laziness, which can also directly contribute to the brainfog, only you yourself can solve that issue by hauling your ass out of your chair and doing something vaguely productive that has some kind of a routine to it, whether it's getting a job, finding a new hobby or expanding the scope of an existing hobby, or just getting out of the basement/shed/flat/apartment/house and going for a long walk once or twice a dayIn the words of the late Major (ret.) Brian Shul, former USAF & SR-71 pilot and photographer/author:#1: Life is uncertain.#2: Don't ever put anything off because of rule #1.
>>7996700No coof jab here.
Tired of people having better things to do.
>>7996723>No coof jab here.Good choice. One more of us, one less of them.
>>7996790Had covid, was fine. Didn't believe we should vax for something so mundane so refused.
>>7996845Today started off good, then I had to sleep and now I feel off.
>>7996846
>>7996723Wish I didn't get it a lot, but we live and learn
I'm supposed to be doing so much. I'm supposed to be training, I'm supposed to be working on my music, I'm supposed to be hanging out with my bros, but I'm so exhausted from work, and I've been struggling with stomach issues. Constant nausea, gas, long shit times, or constipation, there isn't anything wrong according to the doctors. I'm cutting so much out of my diet and going down to the basics. No more processed slop, no more fast foot, no more alcohol, no more refined sugar or anything with high fructose corn syrup. No changes. I'm so dejected. I'm don't even have extra weight on me. I look perfectly normal. I'm trying my best to improve, for the first time in my life I can honestly say that I'm doing everything in my power but I can't seem to move the needle.
>>7996995Live and learn, indeed. That's the right attitude.>>7997088Hey man, my sister had the exact same issues. Spent years going to the doctor, they could never find anything wrong. She still has it today, but not as bad, thankfully. But don't give up, keep moving ahead even if it seems pointless because it's even more pointless to have made the steps you have then not keep moving.
>>7996662This site is a practice of digging for gold, and leaving the rocks in the quarry. It takes patience, time, and an eye for what you might like in everything. I only really worry when the boards get slow of which, was happening prior to the summer. I personally, have no strong clue to where else I'd go, other than where my hands and feet would feel drawn. It's freeing and I see how it could sound whimsical, or fantastic, but it really has a melancholy. Someimes, you just want to be, where you enjoy to be.If I could find a board here for old HL2 multiplayer mods, garrys mod, and the like; that'd be fantastic really. Back to lurking...
>>7997088> I'm cutting so much out of my diet and going down to the basics. No more processed slop, no more fast foot, no more alcohol, no more refined sugar or anything with high fructose corn syrup.Ironically, the problems with going nuclear and quickly cutting more and more out of your diet and more or less switching overnight to what might seem to be a 'healthy' diet is that you not only risk not giving your body what it actually needs to keep it fully fueled, healthy, and working properly, especially if you have a busy lifestyle with work and training, etc., but the sudden change in diet could actually be causing most/all of the symptoms you listed above that your doctors can apparently find no cause for.So instead of just suddenly cutting off whole food groups that so-called 'experts' deem to be 'bad', and/or falling for the same tired old faddy diets that not only don't actually work, but are usually counter-productive in the long term, perhaps try an alternative plan of eating and drinking what you want, but only within carefully controlled sensible portion sizes, i.e. no more coffee table sized pizzas for 1 with a 6-pack of beer or a couple of xxl sized diet cokes to wash it down, instead get the small pizza and cut that shit up and make 2 or 3 meals out of it and wash each portion down with 1 beer or perhaps a bottle of some kind of flavored water.And rather than having a 12 box of donuts for dessert, get the 4 box and have 1 donut and save the rest to make up 3 more desserts.And don't think you have to eat the exact same foods for each meal like you do with some diets; mix it up every day and keep each meal interesting within actually sensible serving sizes and then you'll be far more likely to both avoid the kinds of cravings that normally wreck any diet and also keep with the plan while also making sure you're eating and drinking enough to keep yourself properly fueled and fit and ready for your normal daily lifestyle.
>>7997088Hey, pal. I wonder if you could use some fiber. When I used to have those issues I bought an offbrand container of fiber powder. Couple spoons in a glass of water when you wake up, another when you go to bed. This will clear you out and make it not take twenty minutes to shit. Been there. Add more fiber to your diet too - lentils are cheaper than dirt and they taste great. Tons of fiber there. A pound of dried ones will run you less than $1.50 at Walmart and will make two enormous bowls. Add the dried lentils to the crockpot with several cups of water (adjust the amount after your first try til you find how thin/thick you like them) and whatever spices you want. Can throw in leftover vegetables from the fridge and bits of meat to use it up. On low all day, enjoy at night. Cheap as hell, tastes great, good nutrition. Keep posting ITT with your progress. Seriously, grab some fiber powder and get your shitting schedule back on track. Give it a few days to a week, I bet you will see an improvement. This anon here has some good advice too:>>7997227
>>7997236And somehow I forgot to add what is perhaps the most important dietary tip of all time: drink more water. Not only will it help with damn near everything in regards to your body, it will help keep the kidney stones away. Pic related, one of mine. Never occurred to me to use it as a wallpaper.
>>7995487Sorry m8 but that would be illegal
>>7997088>>7997227Also, it's good that you cut out the HFCS (a suspected cause of food allergies and/or gastrointestinal issues), but if you can also avoid any of the other artificial sweeteners out there as well then that's definitely a good thing, i.e. aspartame (derived from potassium salt), acesulfame (also derived from potassium salt), saccharine (derived from sodium salt), sucralose (chemically processed methanated sugar), stevia (derived from the result of processing specific plant leaves, which 'pre-stevia' processed result apparently can be mutagenic in high levels, except nobody seems to know exactly what constitutes a 'high level' of it).That said, don't be quite so concerned about entirely cutting out sugar though, not saying you need to consume 15 pounds of it a day, just that a small but reasonable amount of sugar as part of a sensible daily diet based on portion control rather than calorie counting is still absolutely okay, because cutting sugar out 100% will definitely lead to the kinds of cravings that will absolutely guaranteed wreck any attempt at a sensible daily diet.This is why all those 'low sugar' and 'diet' drinks and foods that use any of those aforementioned artificial sweeteners also generally include at least some amount of actual sugar in their recipes, because it was eventually found that using just artificial sweeteners on their own in products was causing people to actually drink and eat MORE and thus GAIN more weight, this was because people weren't getting the necessary triggers (that you can only get from actual sugar) in their brains that they'd consumed something sweet, and of course as the cravings continually built up people would eat and drink more of their 'diet' products and still not get the needed 'sweet' triggers, and so the vicious cycle would only continue and escalate as the people increasingly craved something sweet as they followed their diet and yet they piled on the pounds and couldn't work out why.
>>7997394...cont.This is also why any of those drink and food products out there that specifically claim to be 'zero sugar' and which actually contain no actual sugar in them, should be completely avoided, at least certainly while attempting a sensible daily diet, because those products will absolutely not help any effort to maintain or lose weight, but instead will almost certainly contribute to weight gain through increased food and drink consumption caused by unfulfilled cravings.
>>7997236>Hey, pal. I wonder if you could use some fiber.Good advice Anon, though you just reminded me of this greentext story that some other Anon wrote back in the day... :D
>>7997091Thanks anon. Did she just adjust lifestyle or did she eventually find over the counter solutions?>>7997227For sure, I wasn't ever a gluttonous/binge eater. It was more of a gradual reduction and moderation, and eventually i got to the point where I realized that I didn't really miss the unhealthy foods and alcohol so moderation just became cutting. I'll still have some pizza or a doughnut, but I prefer baking pastries myself these days. >>7997236I went for the fibre route a while back, and it worked well initially and then stopped working. I shifted to including more foods high in magnesium.That is a relatively recent change that seems to be helping in addition to more water. >>7997394I didn't know there was more than aspartame, thanks anon. Something about artificial sweeteners as a solution in the minds of these food companies instead of making a moderated product seems so insidious to me. I haven't really gone down the rabbit hole of specific diets perse, but I guess I am organically inching towards more of a mediterranean diet.
>>7996662I hope you can figure something out, I feel like I know all too well what you mean.
>>7997563Hey bud, it just sorta calmed down as she aged really. Wish I could give you something that would maybe give you some relief. Sorry :(>>7997594Thanks man, appreciate the kind words. Everything will eventually work itself out, I'm just often haunted by the past and the "what if's" and the "I shoulda"'s if you know what I mean.>Loving this wallpaper, picrel. such a 90's vibe.
>>7997238Man, people don't realize just how essential water is! I used to be a huge soda drinker, with and without sugar, didn't matter.Had low energy, felt often queasy, ran out of soda one day and didn't feel like going to the store and decided I'd give my body a break. I had no idea the urge I got for water when it first hit my lips, been drinking water now instead of anything else and my queasiness has gone away, and I have more energy.I can feel my body actually crave water now.>>7997286Kek, that's what I think when my therapists asks me to tell her how I feel...
I'm angry. A few years ago I fell at work and ruined my back, the manager at work lied and lied to avoid being held responsible. It's been seven years with constant back pain, I really want to hurt him for lying so they didn't have to pay insurance...I'm not going to, I'm not that kind of person, but my anger clouds my mind at times.
>>7997635>>7997637Btw, check out "Ether" on Deviantart, they have a lot of chill wallpapers imo.
>>7997563aye, the really insidious thing though is the fact that so-called food and scientific 'experts' went on the longest rant about how too much salt is bad for people, and then when they got bored of that after salt levels started being reduced in certain processed foods they next went after saturated fats before eventually switching their focus and going after sugarto which pressure the response from the food and drink production industry was to start creating and/or using a whole bunch of different additional 'sugar alternatives', the three most commonly used of which (i.e. aspartame, acesulfame, saccharine), at least until Stevia/Steviol came along a few years ago, were ALL based on salts...and of course hardly anyone in the food & drink industry raised a fuss about that inconvenient fact, and hardly anyone from the scientific community or from federal bodies like the FDA raised much of a fuss about that fact either, and so the general public were, and still are, mostly left completely in the dark about that whole awkward little paradox of "too much salt is bad for you, but here, have some secret salt..."As for baking your own pastries, good call, can't beat a freshly baked pastry, unless it's with some freshly baked cake :D
I'm having second thoughts about applying for a job that requires a video as part of the application process.
>>7997641The FDA is a joke. Most government agencies are.
>>7997642a video?if it's for a reasonably decently paying job with good prospects at some kind of high-end artsy media entertainment company or graphic/architectural/interior design studio, and the video is supposed to demonstrate your portfolio and/or skillset, then honestly it might actually just be worth sucking it up and making the video.on the other hand if it's meant to be video c.v. in lieu of an in-person interview for some slightly more than minimum wage gig with minimal future prospects, wherein you'd be expected to work up to 20 hours a day, 6 days a week, with no paid overtime, and you'd essentially be the office gopher and teaboy, then fuck that shit.
Today i had a good day at work, and im getting a raise soon. Then i got an email from my professor saying i got a 9 in the course and dont have to take finals, which means i have a month of rest from uni. To celebrate my father oppened up a nice bottle of Gran Enemigo Malbec, so i layed on the couch and watched the last episode of The Bear with a glass of wine on my hand. I cried. Then i ate dinner cooked by my mom, it was delicious. While eating i got a whatsapp from my grandmother, she wanted to congratulate me, i told her that it means a lot, and that i care for her.And now im on my bed, listening to the soft rain on the roof. Life was pretty good today anons, i am happy.Hope you guys are doing well, i love you all. <3 Heres some music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTksi_VXGCk
>>7996689Think about you, think about you thinking what to think about. Picture yourself in that abism, surrounded by nothing, but have a warm feeling in your heart from all the beings that care for you. Learn to value that little flame in your heart. You will be good. We are all rooting for you.
>>7997877Awesome sauce, so happy for you anon!
>>7997877good stuff, anon, I like to read uplifting posts like this.
>>7997401Kill yourself faggot.
Anybody else troubled by dreams? Had that problem most of my life. Lately they're playing tricks on me by giving me the things I want only to wake me up right before whatever the "end" is.
At last, things start to look up for me. Still have plenty of work to do to be the person, I'd myself be super proud of, but first results on my way are stellar.
>>7998817You think that's bad, wait 'til something you dream starts playing out for real at some (much) later time and you get a wicked case of deja vu from it... that's a proper mindfuck I can tell you.
What if the whole world was just 1% more compassionate?
absolutely nothing.
I've just started to be on the up, work is good, sleep pattern is almost fixed and I'm losing weight. I've been posting here for years, since late '05 and I'm now in my 30's. I know there is probably not many posters left who've been here this long. But after reading this thread I'm feeling grateful for the good (and bad) that this place has given us all. Sure I sound like I'm wearing rose tinted glasses, but I'm genuine. Thank you Anon's for always been here.
My dad died last week of congestive heart failure. No one in my family knew that his health was as bad as it was. He was having minor heart attacks for 3 days, checked himself into the hospital, had a major heart attack and they couldn't save him. I called him on July 3rd. My last conversation with him was cut hort because doctors walked into the room and he said he had to go. I asked him if he was scared, and he replied "a little." In a tone that I'd never heard him speak in before. He was dead two days later. Now I'm stuck planning a funeral with my brother, with no road map to guide us. (Not even sure he had life insurance.) I work 14hr days and have a life and kids of my own who are starting school in a few weeks. Feeling overwhelmed is an understatement. I'm still kicking myself for not calling him on the 4th. I do have a voice-mail from him saved though. It was on my birthday this year. All he said was "....hey." I listen to it daily.
>>7999148>op hereBut yeah, I guess going along with the theme of this thread... don't eat like shit til you hit 70 cause eventually the shit food will kill you. Wether you're overweight or not. (He wasn't that fat really. Like maybe 30lbs or so.) But he had diabeeus and chose to ignore it. This is the future you choose.
>>7999149Shit. That was not the picture I wanted. Sorry guys.
>>7999148Im sorry to hear that, lost my grandmother who raised me recently and was in the same boat as you. Try speaking to the hospital or funeral home, they should give you useful information.Again, sorry for your loss.
>>7996662Philosophy, bud. Big hugz.
My wp is from a sega rally machine in Bundoran, Ireland. It's gone now.>>7995503Always loved this one.>>7996666checked, really nice wp>>7996848whoa, ai?>>7997877checked, wp is to my taste, cheers for the song too, heres one for you if you're still here, your one reminded me of it somehowhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7GG7gbKR-E
Life is going good enough now that I can actually start thinking longer term. Moving out, career, home-ownership... etc.Eventually I can seriously start considering marriage, but the girl I'm currently with isn't the right girl to marry; differences in certain values make me feel that way, things that are 'non-negotiable' so to speak. This feeling sucks because I like her, and if a few things were different she'd be an unquestionable keeper.You're gonna carry that weight
>>7999289Not sure if it's AI or not, sorry.>>7999280Thanks bud.
Put in for a job. Fingers crossed.
My favorite wallpaper. Only have this resolution.I am trying to cover a hole in living room wall that was actually drilled on purpose for TV mount, but I don't want to put the TV on the wall and am renting this house. I am going to order 24"×36" poster board print of... something. Has to be portrait, but if resolution is high enough I think I can crop to the needed dimensions and it will still look okay.Two things I have thought I'd be okay with but haven't been able to find are:- MC Escher, the famous one, or anything with optical illusion- The world at night map, but as two hemispheres, one on top of the otherAnyone have something like the above? Or if not, have any ideas? Suggestions welcome>>8000315Good luck!
>>7995487I'm further than I was a year ago. I still believe I have further to go. Things are good yet my mental sanity is not holding. Even trough good times, there's overwhelming fear and anxiety that cuts my sleep. A constant background process that has memory leak. I changed everything for the better but the only thing that hasn't updated is that single process. An outdated point of view with new data to use. And through all this, I found at some point something that helped sanitize the process's output just to lose it again and putting me deeper in this constant unset state that's now.If I can give one advice to anyone reading this :Don't get personally involved in something you can't walk out of in 30 seconds without ruining yourself either personally or professionally
>>8000352Ha, fucking mood my man. What you're experiencing is not uncommon, in fact it is very common...your brain and body have a lot of processes that only care about one thing. Keeping you alive. You're in a mild flight or fight mode all the time because of these previous experiences. I was in one of these modes because and just recently got out of it. I was in this mode for 2 years almost because of a stressful period where I finished a degree, and working with a former friend that turned his narc tendencies to 11, and decided to bully me because he was jealous of how far I've come in life. You need to do two things: Lift, and bury the past. For the lifting part, you can find power lifting racks and bars for around 250 bucks ish. You don't need a gym membership, but that works too if you don't have an option. Get a mold, bag of concrete, 2" diameter pipe for the hole in the middle, make your own plates. You can make a 35 pound concrete plate for like 10 bucks. Follow the Strong Lifts program to start (google it). You should also engage with this program that was created by a few psychs including Jordan Peterson. It's called self-authoring, but specifically the section called past offering. It's supposed to help you put away the past and just resolve those old emotions. You write about sections in your life and then identify important memories and how it affected you, all in a structured way. Its 14 bucks, buy it. Finishing that shit made me feel great, like I did as a kid, carefree and even more motivated to do things than I was before. Good luck man.
>>8000384Additional point: You lift for two reasons, to feel tougher and stronger, and to get those endorphins. As for me, what I'm thinking, life is good and I'm enjoying the ride. I put the work in, it's starting to pay off. The only way you can fail is if you don't try.
When you find yourself "keeping score" in a relationship, you should reevaluate it.
Every time, just when I think I've found solace, I come across something that makes me feel alienated yet again. Whether it's finding out about a friend's concerning opinions, even if they didn't mean harm, or if its seeing literal plague rats infest anything and everything (even this very thread). At times I have to hold myself back from exploding on people and threatening them and wishing violence on them or on genuinely evil people. I've already lost a Discord account to that, no joke. I could retreat back into nostalgia, but then I would have to reckon that ruinous things were happening even then. I like old tech and aesthetics and either the powers that be want to take that away, or cloutchasers will make it the lamest fucking thing ever. Not to mention that several issues I have strong stances on have been subject to one of the most blatant yet distressingly successful shitcoat ops of all time.Am I just doomed to be a wanderer? I've already drifted away from many communities. I'm a much different person than I was 5 years ago, and and that was already a far cry from what I was like 5 years prior, at least in terms of beliefs and personal tastes.
>>8000352Those things that we can't lose are what make us people, even if they hurt us.
>>7996698I'm happy for you anon
I'm running out of money and applying to multiple jobs a day but haven't heard anything back. The main thing giving me peace and happiness right now is my cat, even though he destroyed a roll of paper towels this morning. He's a little asshole but I love him so much it's unbelievable.
>>7995487falling in love
>>7995491/wg/ is probably the best kept secret of this garbage website
>>8000325I don't know if you wanted this, but I did some digging for the original source of that wallpaper you posted. Believe it or not, I think I've seen some other wallpapers by the same artist here before! He even has a whole gallery:https://gtgraphics.de/en/wallpapers/dreamhttps://www.deviantart.com/tobiasroetsch/art/Dream-189336861Hopefully either of these links are helpful
>>8000922I really, really love the tilted landscape in thesehttps://desktopography.net/portfolios/aura/
>>7995491sadly, posts like these contradict this >>7996790
>>7995487suicide honestly
>>8000927i want this dude to find a meaningful reason to stay alive and find a peaceful way to better his community if not the world
ive worked a shitty job since january and ive never felt more alone, depressed, exhausted and unmotivated in my life. I've been on ssri's in the past and I've gone through the ringer buit im 19 now, and im watching everyone i grew up with go to university and i feel im just lagging behind. I feel i won't amount to anything and ill get stuck doing trades. i haven't felt alive or fully there since probably a little over a year ago and im so fucking sick of iti want to live in the moment with my friends, not in my head 60 feet away it feels like.yknow that stupid ass movie inside out? i feel like im one of those emotion fucks watching my life play by.
>>8001368
>>Insomnia
>>8001373Bro same
>>8001368Knowing a trade is extremely beneficial to you and can be very profitable. Just because you're welding or plumbing and they're working in an office doesn't make them better than you. Where I live they're hiring anybody with a pulse for an electrician apprenticeship for $23/hr starting. You can definitely do well in life working a trade. The "you have to go to college to amount to anything" is a very outdated (and flat out wrong) way of thinking. If your friends are really friends they will build you up, not drag you down or make you feel lesser. Good luck, pal.
Feels like ever since I moved in with my girlfriend, she seems to care to be around me less and less and doesn't really invite me to come with her often when she goes out for coffee or errands. She doesn't even really initiate sex or even cuddles, and I'm almost always the first person to reach out. When I bring this up with her and tell her I feel unwanted/unloved, she says she's sorry, it's her fault, she'll try to do better, etc. all the usual shit but it feels like she doesn't even try to change, nothing actually happens in reality. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt as she's been stressed out due to lack of hours at work, but this is the second relationship in a row where I've felt like I'm putting 90% of the work in for physical affection and emotional connection and getting next to no reward back. Love shouldn't be like this, right? I'm right in saying she doesn't love me?
>>8001600you dont live with women, if you do, they lose all respect for you once they know you want them. if you want to make this work, go do your thing without her, dont ask, just go do you, i can not stress how women say one thing and do another, if she knows you love her and want her, she will push you further away to "shit test" you, keep your life yours, the more you allow her in the more she will lose all respect for you. love is a facade to get men to give women what they want, children. once they have that you no longer matter, and sex is over. id suggest a reading the "rational male", you can either love women or understand them, you can not do both.
>>8001606Not a man, but what if I as a man want children?
>>8001600If she's making you feel unwanted then you need to get her to want to take you. It's probably not the nicest way to say it, but you need to use that negative drive to put you at the best you. If she still doesn't want to spend time with you then, you should break up with her because you're not happy. You can't rely on people to change, but you can change yourself. My Ex and I had similar issues, in the end we separated, not because of a lack of love, but because we just didn't fit well together (got lazy and did too many drugs) and that's Okay.>>8001606This is one way to look at a relationship, however I prefer one where your partner is your best friend, One where your lives aren't bound together because of some sense of "duty" but where you share what parts of your lives you want--be it pain, pleasure, peace, w/e. I agree that you should live your own life, but if you share parts of your life you might find yourself more in a state of "love".The idea of loving or understanding is simple-minded. There's barely any difference between the male and female brain, it's more of a chemical balancing issue. And the state of "love" does exists, it's when a specific person triggers your love juices (not your horny juices). The ideal goal is to work building a love so that every time you see that person you feel some amount of love (even when you're pissed off)
>>8001606For anyone reading this, this post is not how things go in a real relationship. Maybe it's a new generation thing, and/or Tinder "dating." A normal woman won't do this to you.
>>8001706Amen. It's definitely not a generational thing. I'd say anyone who spends time "watching twitch" for 3 hrs a day or 4hrs "browsing" tiktok (bleh) is considered "normal" and that kind of behavior leads to having an unhappy life. It's hard when these same people end up with depression and mental issues and then find comfort and support through those same mediums keeping them unhappy. :(I can't wait to move to a country where people are normal, not racist phone-jockeys.
>>8001440>8001440thanks, anon. i appreciate your view. new perspective for me
I tried to kill myself. I overdosed while I had severe pneumonia, I was probably less than hour from certain death. I did it high on benzodiazepines and I only figured that I tried to end it all about a month later when I talked with the guy that sold me the drugs (he was with me that night, before I swallowed everything). I'm still recovering, but in terms of my mental health - I feel like I'm stuck in the same life that put me in the position to commit suicide, and I don't have an escape. I have a mother, that I can't say anything to, since she loves to deny how badly I feel. I have a girlfriend, yet we fight constantly and any time I even bring up how toxic that is, she goes into a suicidal rage. Her family continues to talk shit behind my back, they always hated me. My family is now completely indifferent to me. I got diagnosed with ADHD this week, at 20, yet, my health is so bad, I can't take meds for it.I had a fight with my girlfriend over the phone yesterday. After crying for two hours and wanting to harm myself, as I usually would've done, I have now lost all emotion. I'm in limbo. I started drinking, even though it's really bad with my antidepressants and anti-anxiety medication. I feel like it's only a matter of time before I go back and successfully end my life. Seems like nothing changes, and there's not a lot I can change. Any decision is backed with resentment, guilt and sadness. Doing nothing feels terrible, doing something feels worse. I can't get out without harming myself even more.
My soul yearns for something better. It's tired and hurt. I have never really had a friend group and the one good friend I've had I haven't talked to in years, we drifted away from each other long ago. Since probably middle school a deep sadness has kindled itself into my core and has grown into a part of me. Even before then I've seen the world akin to a television show, for lack of a better term, with the feeling growing stronger as time escapes. I watch the people I went to school with and used to be around make memories with their lifelong friends, get married, have kids, etc. while I watch the seasons pass. I'm painfully comfortable in this position. Most every time I've casted my self into the show I end up hurt by the people I put my trust into. Betrayed, lied to, forgotten, or used. No use in specifics but the only person to break that rule has been my mother. What a great person she is. At least I have her. It hurts me to pain her with my inescapable sadness. Most of the time I hide it. Sometimes I forget about it. But always it comes back. I often wonder if something is wrong with me. That must be the case because why else would these things happen to me? However from the brief times I let people in I seem to be genuinely enjoyed by the people I talk to. Most people want to keep talking to me and if I talk to them one on one they seem to trust me with things they never or often never tell others. Yet I am still alone. It must be because of my fear of letting people in and potentially being drastically hurt. Partly because of that I have never had a real relationship with a woman. May also be due to my own stupidity but either way it adds a great pain onto an ocean of hurt. Until I get over this grave problem I'll sit in my field of peace and enjoy the beauty of nature and enjoy my small moments of happiness before the sadness comes back. sry for length had to cut it bc too long comment lol but enjoy some music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYB92yzl9ns
I wish to spend my time here, away from my life and retreating to what looks like a stable home with proper effort put into upkeep
>>8001904There are still positive, drastic measures you can take without taking your own life.There is always the option to just go and leave.
>>8001971The sadness coming back is painful, but it as much of a part of life as the happiness is, and if you want it to be it can help highlight that happiness. I hope we both get over our fear of really emotionally connecting with people. I'm often afraid that if I tell people how I really feel and who I am, it'd push them away. And it has, even one I think I might've loved. Just as I thought I was getting somewhere, too. But I am going to move on.You are not alone, and you can get out.
>>8001440Not only would I say it's outdated and wrong, I'd say UNLESS you have the money for college up front, I'd NEVER consider going.I have friends who took a trade job and they make just as much as any college man. PLUS, ZERO debt!College is for suckers and have been since the 90's. Trade school is common sense.Sorry, empty with wallpapers :(
DON'T BE PUSSIESWE'RE ALL GONNA MAKE IT
>>8001975Do you have any idea where is this anon? looks comfy as fuck
>>8000384Yeah, that's pretty much how it is for now. Been lifting for a year this month. Never gave up a single day. I believe I can't live without it anymore. Two hours daily from Mon 'til Fri. It allows me to evacuate overwhelming feelings and feel satisfied physically and mentally about a progress that only I can do for myself and by myself.Regarding Jordan Peterson I heard of him (got into his talks trough some reject modernity stuff). I appreciate his point of view and will look into that program you mentioned.Thanks for the advices and the good luck. Hope everything will be good on your end.>>8000385I do this to be the best version of myself but your point is true and valid.Great for you man ! You can't know how good you can be at something unless you try.>>8000641Whatever you overcame in the past layed the foundations to the current you.
>>8001989true, but there's often a tradeoff with trade jobs. i met a guy in his 50s who fucked up his back so badly that he cant even drive a car anymore. he lives in constant, hellish pain. and now his company is fighting him over health insurance too.
bird sex
I'm unemployed. 35 years old. Applied for several jobs recently, clerical/office work shit for the county. Looks like I'm probably under qualified for even the most basic "punch shit into a computer" job. I was listless. Waited too long. Very stupid. Keep fucking things up with my best friend. Thinking I'd like to end it.
You've been thinking about the timeYou've been dreading itBut now you see that moment has arrivedShe's at the edge of the bedShe gets inBut it's hard to turn the opposite way tonight
>>7999148hey if it makes you feel any better I'm a khv in my 30's with both parents dead and don't have a brother
>>7996254I visit /wg/ very rarely because it's so slow, but it definitely is one of 4chins better boards because some threads like this one are diamonds in the rough.
>>8001971Christ
I watched The Shack last night with two people that have unintentionally been helping me heal from years of some pretty intense PTSD. It gave me a lot of peace that I haven't had in...honestly can't remember how long. Answered some hard questions.But fucking shit, that scene on the lake with the black tar in the water...felt like I couldn't breathe I was sobbing so hard. Took them both hugging me from both sides just so I could get it under control enough to keep going.
Job interview tomorrow. Been unemployed for eight years. Nervous. Could use a good luck wish or two.
>>8004436You'll do just fine Anon, good luck to theeIn the words of The Greeters Guild, get in there with your head up, shoulders back, don't slouch, think only relaxed calming positive thoughts, and smash it
Love my country but might have to leave because these housing prices are getting insane. The country's become a playground for rich foreign nationals and the rest of us are left to suffer.
>>8004450Appreciate it, pal. I got the job. Pay ain't great but it's something.
>>8004436How was it anon?
>>8004871It really couldn't have gone better. It was the first time I'd had an in person interview in nearly twenty years. Got a few weeks of training ahead and then I dive in. The field is totally new to me. Excited, anxious, a bit scared. But I'm going for it.
>>8004720well done Anon, congratz
Looking forward to Fall.
>>8004877hell yeah brother
I want to be alone but I'm also worried that it'll eventually make me feel lonely.
Things have never been good for me, but these past three years have been absolute torture.Had to change jobs, I'm earning literally 50% less. I can't find a new job. I've put out over 100 applications over the course of 8 months. I'm 34 years old. Never had any friends. Never had a girlfriend. Never had a purpose in life. Never had any passions. I truly don't know what more I can do; even when I try to improve things, nothing changes. I don't know how much longer I can keep going on.
22, battling porn and gambling addiction. When I was younger I made a lot of money quickly, it skewed my value of it, and now I've lost it all. All this time I've been wanting to overcome all my flaws, but for some reason the light at the end of the tunnel never gets closers. I feel like I'm so far gone, that what's ahead of me just seems impossible to overcome. Too fearful to ask anybody for help in fear of judgement. With all that being said for some reason, I still try to be better than I was yesterday, but I guess I'm starting to lose hope once and for all.
>>8005535I believe in you, pal.
>>7995487my balls itch
I need to win the lottery.
>>7995487Nigger
First day of the new job. Tired.
Do you guys have a place you go to clear your head? I enjoy feeding and watching the birds.
>>7996671Even if you're old, you can still change course. I started reading history this year, and I am starting to see things differently.
>>8007866walking is the best possible way to clear your head
Got a new job caring for people with developmental disabilities. It's actually very satisfying to help folk.
Is it worse to realize there is something to live for but recognizing it's very remote and probably unattainable, or that there is nothing to live for? After some experience, I think it's the former. I've irregularly vacillated between long sustained periods of despair and small windows of blissful contentment or even ecstasy for almost 12 years. I've made almost no progress in my life despite being nearly 30. I think it's already over and I've been telling myself that for 12 years, but surely having atrophied myself I can be vindicated now, right? I don't even have the agency to stop desiccating. Maybe one of these days I'll become a mummy.I'm a typical pseudo-intellectual shut-in who suspects they see more about life and is at bottom angry and afraid in similar fashion to many who use this site. If you're by the shore and soil yourself digging in the rotting wrack you may spy me. I'm a thirsty thing drinking the brine; I love and hate being seen. I can see what I should do and understand that it's the best thing I could do to verify what I think is best and then live that, yet I fail over and over again to even properly start. It's an Augean stable and I'm not Hercules. I don't have faith in myself to do anything. I don't even know why I always fail to sustain my efforts despite speculating endlessly about them and trying again. It would be simplest to conclude I'm a moron, but that attribution seems surprisingly irrelevant to what I think is good about life. I'm just confused almost all the way down, my only certainty is I'm too foolish to give up. When you glimpse heaven the world loses some of its lustre.This may sound vapid but I can hardly express what I mean in 2k characters. Ultimately I am alone, and that itself is a fine arrangement I've made. It might be pointless messaging here but I'm not as afraid of reproach anymore. I'm still curious how the creature looming over me will disdain my wriggling. Maybe I'll learn something new.
Remote work isn't that bad if you got a wife you can pork when you want
>>8008663I think I see where you're coming from. For many years I drifted, realizing that what I was doing was "wrong" in the sense that I wasn't working. Trying to smooth everyone over with the, "it'll be different eventually" security blanket, and at the same time attempting to placate the guilt I always felt. Over time that placation was just not enough anymore.The "arrangement" (if you can call it that) was that my wife worked full time and I took care of the house. I was essentially a stay at home dad without any kids, which was emasculating in itself. She was always supportive of me, gave me encouragement. It was my own shit standing in the way, just as usual. My body went to shit, I ballooned to an enormous size, and was just generally unhappy with the hole I'd dug myself into. In the end, she sat me down. "Anon, I can't be the only one working anymore. I don't want to feel anxious every time a bill comes due. I'm exhausted." That resonated with me. The next day, I started applying for entry level jobs at 35 years old. Soon after, I was hired.The guilt had overwhelmed me for so long that I was becoming complacent with how my actions (really, inactions) were affecting my wife. That's no way to treat a woman you love. Everybody says this, but here's one of the times where it's the truth: the only person standing in the way of my success was myself. As ever, we are our own worst critics.This is a bit of a rant and I apologize for not direct addressing your post. In my opinion, failure doesn't matter. If you try for something and it doesn't work out, you wake up the next day and try something different. Eventually you will get out of your own way and allow yourself that chance to succeed. I love you, pal. Keep me posted. Godspeed.
It's been an alright summer. Except for the heatwaves.
I'm starting a paint and bodywork shop, it's hard and I'm afraid of not making it, but I can't stand white collar wage cuckery anymore.The next few months will be crucial, and now it's do or dieWish me luck, anons
>>8008841You got this, brother.
JOIN US
>>7998942>proceeds to post jewsLMAO
>>80086878663 again, thank you for your response!One issue (and sometimes blessing) of my life is an uncertainty whether I love other people. Your love for your wife, with the right trigger, motivated you out of your circumstances but I don't believe I have something comparable currently. What's most compelling to me about life is not other people, but I'm unsure if the love people refer to is simpler and present in me and I haven't recognized it properly. I feel stupid for asking this but I want to know: what are the signs of the love you had which are easy-enough for a sandhopper like me to know I am or am not experiencing the same thing? Maybe the guilt you speak of is a sign because that does resonate with me. I have the kernel of a conscience somewhere, and it does fuel my apathy and sense of worthlessness that I'm near useless. The one I care most about is 'myself' (past, present, and future iterations of that self too that might not be "me" as I understand me now) and I recognize my lifestyle is no way to respect myself. It hasn't been enough to break me out of this malaise, which is part of my frustration: the one thing I seem to care about isn't enough to get me where I want. I think the guilt has also overwhelmed me in a way that I'm complacent with my inactions and I understand that it's ruining my prospects and those of people around me, but since I already feel like things are over anyway I often don't see the point in trying. I know these reactions are like seasons, and there are seasons of productivity and even job searching/application but I'm not consistent enough to make significant change. Something always derails me. I'm also convinced that even if someone were stupid enough to hire me for my major for I'd fuck it up anyway because I believe I'm incapable of anything.Maybe I lack the trigger.This is one of my favorite wallpapers and came from a thread here within the last few years, I'd like to extend it to you.
>>8009091>what are the signs of the love you hadInteresting question. People often compare it to the feeling of "butterflies." For me it was the way I felt whenever I talked to her. Complete elation, a high feeling, needing to catch my breath because my mind was working a hundred miles an hour and I couldn't think straight. It's hard to describe. It is probably the most pure example of the saying, "When you feel it, you'll know it." At least that's how it was for me.As far as your feeling of it being "over," I can understand thinking like that. But look at it like this: you're not thirty years old yet. The average male (I'm assuming you're male) life expectancy in the US (I'm assuming you're American) is 77 years old. This means you aren't even halfway through your life yet. Do you want to feel this way for another 35+ years? Imagine the things that can be accomplished in that span of time. In fact, if you're 29 right now, you have, statistically, around 38 more years. We landed on the moon in 1969, and the iPhone launched in 2007 - 38 years. Imagine all the shit that happened in that span of time. Knowing all that, I'm certain that, eventually, you can find something to give your life meaning and purpose. As for love, that can be hard. As far as I'm concerned, you have to learn to love yourself before you can extend that love to anyone else. Find a way to be content, then find the love. It might happen the other way around, or simultaneously. But if you keep trying, it's virtually impossible to fail. I'm confident things will improve for you. Just keep going.Thanks for the wallpaper. Saved. Here's one I took at my old "thinking spot."
>>8009111And of course I did my math wrong. You actually have 48 more years (statistically).
>>7995487>stuck back at home with parents at 29>finally got a good paying job>job constantly praising me and the head boss of the facility wants to promote me>upgraded pc to insane levels>coworkers and random people say I am living the best life right now>further away from getting a gf than ever>brother's dog (only being making me happy) will go back to brother in octoberI am as depressed as I was when I almost killed myself, but all around me are fake smiles.
I keep getting used, and it's incredibly frustrating, it feels like everything I do to make my life more bearable, every right step I take just makes me return to this shitty state of someone I care about using the fact that I care about them, or not caring at all. This isn't even just about my shitty romantic life, it's about a lot of friendships even mentors and parental figures that just never cared back and either hurt me or ended up hurting me. I took this photo a while back
Outside of my family it's like I don't exist (sometimes quite literally, others don't seem to notice that I'm there and sometimes even get jumpscared when they do), and I have begun to despise others for their indifference. I simply cannot form a genuine connection with others, and I can't make any new friends or acquaintances. Well, now I don't want to anymore, I just want to live and die alone, eventually in the most isolated areas I can possibly find, but it still hurts a little bit.
Been getting into it with my best friend lately. Think we're both just really stressed out and tired.
Feeling low.
I really don't feel like living anymore. I'm 31, I live with my mom who doesn't fucking care about my feelings and I just can't take it anymore. I don't even know why I'm typing this, this shit is constant in my life and there's just no end to it.
I'm 27 and still live at home because I can't afford to leave, despite making nearly 60kMy girlfriend's best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer and is making it her entire life, which in turn is stressing my girlfriend outMy high-needs-care grandfather who I admittedly don't have a particularly strong relationship with is dying, likely very soon, and I feel next to nothing about itAssuming he doesn't, he'll be moving in with us despite him owning his house and having other family members being closerI work the same job doing the same thing every day and get treated like shit only to do it all over again the next dayWhat the fuck, /wg/...I want off the ride, but I don't want to off myself. I just want shit to change, but fuck me if I'm not powerless to change it.
>>7995487Maybe call it the Catharsis thread?Using >>7995491's description of /wg/ as inspiration (Pic is OC fwiw)
>>8004877Congratulations, anon. I hope you excel in every way. I believe in you
I feel like I can't be myself anymore. What was once liberalism is now a 1984 hivemind.All my friends have turned from joking about everything from gays to blacks to abortions, but now I'm afraid to say anything without them flipping out. I can't find a woman because they're either far left or right. I get laid and ditch them, which I can't really complain, but I feel empty.I feel like the internet has turned the world to shit. In giving everyone a voice, they use it to judge and condemn, forcing people to become walking/talking robots of what they expect they should be, not who they really are.The more I think about it, the more I think, "hey, maybe death ain't so bad"
>>8000352thanks for the advice anon!
>>8011030Hang in there, buddy. I'm sure things will change, and it'll eventually get better.
>>8011031That's not a bad idea. Wonder what other anons think? This thread is for everybody so I'd like people to agree on the name before I change it for the next thread. I dig your image.>>8011032Thanks, pal. So far so good.
Trying to be better, trying to be happy. Got a couple days off but they're all the same, they all go by so fast.
>>8011247What works for me may not work for you, but if I’m feeling particularly down I’ll go to the bakery downtown and sit by the water for a bit and just experience it. Feel the sun, hear the waves, smell the saltwater. Reminds me I’m alive and a part of something so much bigger
>>8011591The water has always helped me too. Pic related, my spot.
>>8011592Good ideaPic related as well
I am happy for the first time in years and I cannot express how grateful i am for the things and the people in my life. Anons it gets better, keep pushing, keep reaching for more. It gets better.
About to take the test for medication administration certification. Here goes.
I came here looking for wallpaper aesthetics to fit / inspire a written story idea I had. I wrote a thousand words of it and liked it, but after the glow of a new idea comes the struggle of keeping it alive. It's especially hard when you put your work out for honest, no-holds barred critique, and... no one just fucking replies, ever. You can put your heart out on the page, sharpen your writing style to as spare and precise as you can make it, do as much goddamn research as you want, and invite flaming as unrestrained as old-school mailing list tradition in the pursuit of constant artistic improvement, but what does it fucking matter if no one even takes the bait? It's a bit heavy-handed, but I'm reminded of Elie Wiesel's speech about indifference and the extermination camps: to be abandoned by God is worse than to be hated by God. At least you would have an answer. How am I supposed to know if I've improved, if I'm just a hack, if I'm actually an insensitive racist bigot who produces outdated garbage not liberal enough for a diverse world, or anything in between, if I can't even get an honest insight into what makes my work click or not? Sending work to publications requires fees, and double if you actually want critique, just to meet with writers who critique based on their tastes and not on elements of logic or style. Get your foot in the door by sending money you don't have, or just meet with no one willing to tell you your work is shit or not. They say first you have to be happy with what you write, but why would I be happy languishing in a hole of my own choosing and never knowing if you're ever getting closer to expressing, as Hemingway once said, the way to write truly?
>>8011031good suggestion
>>8012457As a writer, you might draw some inspiration, or just some amusement, from the following article:https://notesfromthegeekshow.blogspot.com/2006/03/ten-things.html
Finally got paid.
>>8013155hello fellow envato slave laborer.
i like women with voluptuous butts
>>8013349and you are not able to produce false testimony and/or statements that are not coherent with facts?
Nothing feels real anymore. It's so weird. Wonder if it's just a part of adulthood.
>>8013470sounds like derealisation or despersonalisation, seek professional mental help... best case scenario just depression or burnout
>>8007895What history have you read that has changed your perspective ?
>>8013599history of my huge dick inside your mother’s nasty asshole!!!
>>7995487Wondering if it makes me a piece of shit to spend the night relaxing and recuperating instead of focusing on bettering myself and maintaining my education and training, or if it's a necessity that is absolutely unavoidable.
I'm getting my degree in nursing in about 3 months with some luck (sometime next year if I don't pass all my finals) and I'm kind of fucking terrified.Teachers tell you that when you're finally working, you'll feel useless for about 5 years until you start getting the hang of things, so I wanted to believe I was mentally prepared, but just a minimal fuck up can make your life and someone else's shit.Just the other day, when we were in our practices, it was my turn to administer medication. Each patinent has a... not sure what the word would be in english, but lets just say "nursing chart". It has everything the patient has to get, how much of it, at what time, and how you're supposed to administer it.So, as I went around looking at what each patient needed, I got to one I hadn't seen in my reading material yet (ranitidine comes to mind but I'm not sure that was it). I turn to the head nurse in charge of guiding us throughout the day and ask her if I just inject it into the IV as the chart said or if I have to keep something in mind."Oh, yeah, Anon. Just be sure to pinch the IV going into the patient for a few seconds so it can dilute with the saline solution. If you forget that, you'll kill him.""...Okay...?"And she said that so casually.So, yeah. That was one big fucking wake up call. Now I cannot even think what I'm going to specialize in if I can just end someones life with a single screw up.I think I'll just keep away from medication for a looong while as I keep studing that shit, and go for something "calmer" like... pediatrics or something.
>>8013665>Each patinent has a... not sure what the word would be in english, but lets just say "nursing chart". It has everything the patient has to get, how much of it, at what time, and how you're supposed to administer it.Here we call it a Medication Administration Record, or just the MAR. Med pass can be daunting. Hang in there, pal. You got this.
>>8000880we are now in love