I spent my entire childhood bullying my brother. We have a 4 year age-gap, and when he was born I couldn't handle the fact that I would have to share the spotlight with him. I reacted by mistreating him constantly all the way up until the age of 18 when I left home and started my adult life. I outperformed him socially, romantically, academically and physically all throughout our childhood (even adjusting for the age gap), and as a child I erroneously felt that this entitled me to additional attention and validation from family, but our parents insisted on treating us as equals, which I can understand. I responded to this by constantly mistreating him, isolating him, demeaning him and causing him to constantly live in fear that I would lash out at any moment. It was truly horrifying and I completely regret my actions, even though I was a child. My parents would punish me for this behaviour, constantly reaffirming that we were equals and I should treat him as such. The reality of course is that I was older, bigger and stronger than him, and I should have protected him and taken him under my wing. I should have been taught that I had additional responsibility, instead of being bashed over the head and told to treat him as my equal. That is how I feel about the situation in hindsight.Now I am in my early 30s and have a great career and a wife, he is still living with my parents and is suffering with mental health problems. We never speak, and awkward silence exists between us when we are together.Is it too late to make this right?
>>34673144How are you gonna fix it
>>34673147It feels like too large of a guilt to rectify. I wouldn't know where to start. I have my own family now that demands my care and attention, but I wish there was a roadmap to redeeming this situation. I often wonder if anyone else has been through similar with their own siblings.
He just might kill you and your bitchwife (and your ugly kids) if his mental health degrades enough.It would be funny if he made you watch while he killed your kids. I have an older bro who wasn't nearly as bad as you, but even so my ire for him is quite violent. If your case, there is a legit likelihood of your whole family getting butchered one day.
>>34673144I hope he kills u
>>34673200>>34673205your reaction to my post is understandable, but my brother is a good man and a gentle soul. If he wants nothing to do with me then I will accept that, but I intend to offer a genuine apology before it gets to that point.
>>34673150You might not have had as big of an impact you though you had and also bullying is natural and what the stronger do to the weaker anyway. But I apologized
>>34673144>Is it too late to make this right?Far too late. You destroyed him in a way he'll never recover from.
>>34673144>Is it too late to make this right?Depends on how genuine you are>>34673233and how true this is. I have a somewhat similar situation just on the otherside of things and with my, unfortunatelly, brother having no desire to make things right. Over the last few years he toned down the insanity (((coincidentally))) about the same time I finally started standing up for myself and making all the things he's done public but you can tell it's not genuine there is no change there is no reason to forgive and forget and move on and I find it hard to believe that'll ever change because nothing he's ever done in his miserable life or mine served to prove me wrong. If you really want to make things right between you and your brother you should try to something more concrete than an apology try to help him out with what he's struggling with show that you've changed and that you regret the past and work up to the actual apology
Ehhh... If I was that younger brother I'd learn to move on and know validation is not necessary.
>>34673144I hope you die, OP. I hope he butchers your kids and your wife in front of you before that though.I had a bad relationship with my brother when I was a kid, me and my brother fought a lot, but we were always there for each other when one of us needed, specially against outsiders.
been there>fix itthat was your father's responsibility you can apologise and stop being a dick, but you're never going to be equals
You owe him sex, and by you I mean your wife. And you have to watch. I don't know any other way around this.
>>34673150>is it too late No shit, the fact that you're making this post proves you have at least an ounce of sympathy in that subhuman narc skull of yoursTake this guilt to your grave, no doubt it'll continue to drive deeper through your conscious and destroy you just the same, honestly the least you deserve, I've no advice for you, only disgust.
>>34673872Obviously meant for op
>>34673144>Is it too late to make this right?Short answer : yes and noLonger answer : you have probably permanently stunted his emotional growth. But you be honest about how you now feel about what you did will help him in his healing process.
>>34673452any suggestions for something more concrete than an apology? I am open to doing whatever I can
Yeah it’s too late. Honestly Gen Y has never been good older siblings and kinda just act like Boomers or Gen X is even on 4chan. Well when humanity ends with Z and A they can’t be surprised
>>34674683I'm not sure Anon, I don't exactly know you or your brother, the things that went between you, what exactly you want to achieve in the end of this or what you consider "right".>The reality of course is that I was older, bigger and stronger than him, and I should have protected him and taken him under my wing.I guess you should try doing this in a sense try to help him out with whatever he's struggling with if he's even open to such a thing, just don't push it too hard it'll just get obnoxious and he'll probably resent you even more. I have a second brother, a middle child, he was never much around and he's just about the only functional member of my family he talked me into going on some road trip thing maybe you could try getting your brother out of the house too but that's later on. I guess for now just try to show interest in him get to know him find out what he likes what he struggles, baby steps and all that
Anon>about being treated as equalsSatan>Or I wasSomehow Satan is more sympathetic than the very evil he gave humanity
Satan is cruel but man will take that cruelty to another level. At least Satan cared about a third of his angels. What does humanity care about? Misery?
This is probably the most human thread I have read on 4chan. It’s grim. It’s a reminder how fucked up we are and the world
>>34674711Thanks, I will be making an effort in this regard.He is still in his core twenties and has time to put himself together, I would love to see him thrive now, so will see if he is open to support after my apology.>>34674715If it's any consolation for those who are mad at me for my actions, they may be relieved to know my own childhood was messed up due to multiple traumatic surgeries I had to go through. I think it made me overly reliant on validation from my parents as a coping mechanism, and I saw my brother as a displacement threat. This was all in the delusional mind of my childbrain. It doesn't justify my actions at all, but it helps to make sense of them.
