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/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.

1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.
2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.
3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.
4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.
5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).
6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text.
7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.
8. You cannot post a picture without text.
9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).
10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.
11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.
12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:
http://blag.xkcd.com/2008/01/14/robot9000-and-xkcd-signal-attacking-noise-in-chat/
>>
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.

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>Don't count the days, make the days count.
Oh you wagecucks! You always say the funniest things!
>>
>not avoiding tax with cash pay

I hope your salary isn't being taxed there anon....
>>
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>>37272651
That's some illegal shit, fatty

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>girl likes me
>she's taller than me
>I'm 6'2"

not sure what to think of this desu
>>
How much taller than you is she?
>>
>>37272524
She's 6'6"

So, noticeably taller. Awkward amazoness.
>>
>>37272544
Eh gimme more information, what is she like? how do you know her?
>>
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>>37272544
that is prime female height fuck off manlet normie

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Why are black people so obsessed with eating ass?
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>>
>>37272573

I think it's for performers only unless you buy a knock off
>>
>>37272554
>>37270882
So are Blasians like double the ass eaters? Like Jhene Aiko?
>>
>>37270882
Maybe theres some fried chciken up massah's ass hole?
>>
>>37270882

It's because it wants to go back. :(
>>
BRAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPOPOOPPPPPPPPP
>*squirt*
>"anon get in here now and clean that up"
>"yes mother dear, anything for you"
>"now get your tongue and wipe mommy clean"
>*squelched chewing* "yes mother right away mother"

How did you do it?
>tfw too embarrassed to even look in the mirror.
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>>
>>37272317
i've been complimented on my looks recently but i simply can't believe
i hate myself so much that imagining not being ugly is just off the charts
>>
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I went from cute shota to an edgy mess to somewhat decent.
>>
>>37271430
This. I'm convinced eating a lot and working out released some growth hormones and test because i developed a nice jaw and wide neck and grew, I went from 5'11 at 18 to 6'2 at 24
>>
>>37272610
If you lose that nasty facial hair and get a good body you'll seriously be like an 8 dude
>>
>>37272610
Your facial hair looks bad desu. How is your jawline? Is that what the facial hair is for, to hide it?

>be me
>be black in a black school
>new white kid joins
>gets bullied all the time
>gets called cumskin everyday
>beaten up every other day
>see him crying after school one day
>feel bad for him
>walk up to him and ask if he's okay
>tfw he says "fuck off, nigger"
>tfw I tell him "ok sure, cumskin"

Can Blacks and Whites ever live together peacefully?
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>>
>>37272552
have white babies or gtfo
>>
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>tfw a teenaged white Chad makes your burger instead of an immigrant
IF IT'S MINIMUM WAGE EXPECT MINIMUM EFFORT THANKS FOR THE JOB DAD
>>
>>37272526
There is a huge number of White men with Asian Women and the whole fetish thing is being discussed all over the place and being brought to light these days....also they make a huge amount of interracial relationships-
>>
>>37272552
Says the liberal cuckold. Most alpha Chads are country dudes who are blissfully ignorant but would side with whites in heartbeat. A liberal can never be a Chad. Men with conservative views have higher levels of testosterone.
>>
>>37272601
Whites have the lowest rate of interracial relationships of all races.

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Anyone else has this ?
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>>
>>37272044
It definitely is a symptom of anxiety. It scared the shit out of me too, thought my brain was on its way out for sure
>>
>>37272044
Depersonalization usually goes in hand with Derealization too, Iktfb
>>
>>37271614
Had no idea it was common for other people to get this from smoking weed.

I had a panic attack two years ago and have never felt the same since. I thought I was just fucked in the head and had finally reached a breaking point.

Feels good to know that there are other people who are / have been in the same situation as me.
>>
Virtually everyday.
>>
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>>37267571
>>37268428
>>37269290
>>37269334
>>37269363
>>37269437
>>37269440

Eh yeah becoming aware of visual snow seems to make it more obvious. I don't remember having it when I was a child since I feel I would notice it. I've been working for the past 3 years on how to fix it, I have a few ideas right now and i've already tried many things. When I figure out how to fix it I would like to help other people too so I will post on here using this image. However it may still take years.

If you had a biracial daughter, how would you react if she brought a black man home with her?
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>>
>>37272333
>If you had a biracial daughter, how would you react if she brought a black man home with her?

It would depend on the guy
If he had a bunch of tattoos and wore a hoodie I wouldn't like him

If he looked like and spoke like obama I wouldn't have a problem

Same with everyone else. If she brings home some eminiem looking faggot I'm telling him to get out of my house
>>
by masturbating furiously
>>
>>37272333
kill him and make her settle down with a timid but hard working hapa boy
>>
>>37272371
You say this to sound more reasonable as a person but by putting forth those two options you are stereotyping

If you had a biracial daughter and still stereotype blacks she will resent you. Everyone knows what you mean, but you wouldn't say this if it were a white man she brought home, you wouldn't say "thug" or hoodie

Just say "my daughter is smart enough to make the right decision" or "anyone she brings home has to be liked by her family", if faced with a raced based question
>>
>>37272333
I dont see the problem. She is her own person and can date whomever she wants. It is none of my business.

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Are you able to stick your ballsack skin in your ass? Is it bad if i can?
>>
>>37272629
I can. My sack just smells bad afterwards.
>>
You going to post evidence or am I just supposed to believe you
>>
>Is it bad if i can?
Probably not. Your ball sack's skin changes properties to regulate heat because it has to be at the right temperature to produce sperm.

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So what's exactly STOPPING you from getting LAID on TINDER???? It's so EASY why aren't you downloading it RIGHT THIS SECOND??
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>>37271939
I get a lot more matches on it
>>
Can I report basic bitches for using the dog Snapchat filter in their photos?

Also another dog-related red flag;
>'If you own a dog I am already yours'

Most people have dogs, fuck off. You're not gonna be shagging the dog (hopefully) so pets are irrelevant
>>
>>37272000
I call those "thot filters" and regularly make fun of girls for using them

yes I'm an asshole but I really don't care
>>
>>37271631
I live on a tiny island devoid of females my age
>>
Just got tinder today swiped through so many women, and no matches i think the app is fucked here in germany

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How do you stack up? Surely NEETs type like 90s movie computer hackers considering they sit on their computers all day.

typingtest.com
>>
>>37272553
199 wpm
git gud
>>
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51 wpm with 6 misspelled words!
>>
>>37272631
why lie on an anonymous somalian image board

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Femanons, if you met a guy who had an attractive face, great personality, and a 7" penis but was 5'7 and 103 lbs and has really long hair is that a deal breaker?
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>>
>>37272220

hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa youre such a thirsty cunt what a loser you are youre whining because you cant find cool guys to date haha bitch youre such a dumb bitch whore I hope you die
>>
>>37272494
> going to calfornia
Memes aside, don't do it. I went there and left my luggage and my heart in San Franciso and the dude at luggage was a dick.

>>37272444
> not being a groupie for a progressive rock band.

Unless he plays a dulcimer I don't want to hold his hand and tell him what a nice boy he is.

>>37272536
(You)
>>
>>37272267
I just dont find looks to be important
that might be just me however
there is not much to explain
>>
>>37272444
>unexpected intense homolust for Ozzy

These are feels I could do without
>>
>>37272630
Would you settle a 1/10, then? Just to be sure, are you a woman?

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>tfw no dom bf to ERP with me and tell me what a wothless slut i am
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>>37262849
>tfw no cute boy to love, pamper, and punish when he's been a bad boy
This is what I want though
>>
>>37272442
It's okay, I'm not the best either
cyan#9024
>>
Maybe I'm just wistful, but I think a demure "pet" that doubles as a friend would be perfect. ERP is fun, but I'd say it's so much more fulfilling to talk and hang out first, learn what each person likes, what excites them, what they're shy to admit. Organically growing a caring dom/sub relationship. But perhaps O:m asking too much from a Bhutanese ship-in-a-bottle enthusiast forum.
>>
Have you ever done anything submissive and lewd in real life with someone?

I've asked my girlfriend to do things like this. she made me get her off, blue balled me, beat me up, and used me like furniture. it was great
>>
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>>37253043
>tfw no boy to tell me how much of a good girl i am

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one week until summer edition
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>Big fucking bluebottle gets into my room
>Pick up the fly spray
>Time slows down as I fucking snipe it
>It starts breakdancing on the windowsil

So satisfying
>>
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>>37271072
Bad bird analogy. Hawks watch, swoop and strike, then they're gone with the prey. A more appropriate way to describe cliquey cowbag office women is crows or magpies, they keep pecking at the prey and don't stop til it gives up then they move onto a new victim.
>>
>>37272564
Serial killer in the making lad
>>
>>37272585
Flies aren't like moths or spiders, you can't trap them with a cup and put them outside.
>>
>>37271233
Why the FUCK haven't you stopped allowing autoplay in Windows settings?

Jesus Christ. It's people like you who keep me in business but it still annoys me to hell and back. Why can't people take the most basic precautions to stop unwanted shit getting onto their machines? It's not fucking hard.

Here is Retard-proof way to move to Japan. Follow this step-by-step guide and you will be in Japan by the end.

Save this guide to your computer somewhere. I aint re-posting this shit anymore.

These steps start easy, and get gradually harder. YOU CAN DO THIS.

Step 1.) Introduce yourself at a 4chan japanese language learning general
>>>/int/74760623 (easy)
>>>/int/74766668 (intermediate)
>>>/jp/16996071 (anime weeb)

Why: this step is important because you need to surround yourself in a community that will support and critique your pursuit of Japanese. You will have to stand up for yourself to make this happen


MOTIVATION TIME: If you need motivation to begin learning japanese, watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IOZbJ7PCPk

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>>
>>37270663
well if its the circus attraction you're after then I suggest others who want to escape to go to Thailand instead. Its easier and cheaper to get in, you don't need college education or high income but still can live in a luxury apartment + all you can eat for the same amount you would spend for a food expenses + tiny room in japan.

I heard you could sign up for a self defense course and that would grant you a years worth of visa. So you're actually learning a valuable skill while you dick around in fantasy land. You also become fit upping the chances of getting a gf, its much better than learning to be a weeboo nobody.

They also use an actual alphabet and simple grammar, so theres no 2000 kanji characters to memorize and recite in your shoebox dorm room. The healthcare is cheap so its also good for long term. They've built new trains and infrastructure, a lot of it is built by Japanese companies, and they have 7/11 at every corner with the same type of services in Japan. Thats really all you need. I doubt many people can do all the steps in ops post, it requires massive long term dedication and effort thats better spent on other things.
>>
>>37271307
They also have the best penis inverters
>>
>>37271307
Nihon he ikitai gaijin wo omoitodomasetekureru no wo arigatou gozaimasu. Ganbatte ne, ima ni mo anata mo nihonjin ni naru deshou.

>Non-ASCII text is not allowed.
>>
>>37271357
>They also have the best penis inverters
I'll bump to that
>>
>man I hate the jews/niggers/etc.
>christ, I really hate all these immigrants shitting up my country
>I fucking hate it when these people who look different than me and aren't part of my culture come to my country and start trying to do shit, they can barely speak the fucking language
>now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take my one or two years' experience speaking Japanese from an online course move to Japan


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