[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Search] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/adv/ - Advice


Name
Options
Subject
Comment
Verification
4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
File
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
06/20/16New 4chan Banner Contest with a chance to win a 4chan Pass! See the contest page for details.
[Hide] [Show All]


Attention: All work safe boards are soon going to be on the 4channel.org domain.

For now, all boards are accessible through either domain.

Make sure to update your script blockers and whitelist the new domain.

The 4chan Vtuber Competition is over. Click here to see the winning entry!



[Catalog] [Archive]

File: 1542428877041.png (87 KB, 922x988)
87 KB
87 KB PNG
I would like feedback on a decision I'm making

I'm 25 years old, I own my own house, I have a career, friends, etc. But I'm depressed and have given up in life. I barely go to work anymore and I am just coasting by.

The reason for me giving up is because I am pessimistic about the chances of me successfully having a family. I look at the divorce rate and have seen with horror what happened to my dad when my family split apart at a young age, and don't want that for my future.

I've emailed an amish style religious cult in the country, expressing my interest to join them. I'm selling my house and leaving everything behind, because the idea of dying alone without children (which I'm statistically likely to, going by current social trends), or going through a divorce, is just too demotivating.

My family hasn't taken to the decision too well. My mother was in tears and my brother laughed it off, saying I'd be back within a few weeks.

But honestly, I don't see any point in participating in modern society, as I don't see there being a future for me here. If I do decide not to leave, I'm simply going to stop participating in the economic system and become a welfare leech, if I'm going to die I'm not supporting this cucked system.
>>
>>20264442
Don't sell the house. Other than that go for it. Do something new to help you get out of that rut. I don't see the reasoning for the Amish community but I know someone who tried living on a commune for similar reasons and it helped him. He ended up hating it but it helped him out in the long run.
>>
>>20264442
Those things don't happen to proper men who are a net positive to a woman's life. You fear those statistics because you are a coward, not the other way around. Become the man that women want to be with, and then you won't die alone.

What the fuck is this? I know I have no game but how do you even speak to someone like this?
21 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20264555
Your trips are nice but a lot of this guys advice is try hard as hell and reads what a teenage kid believes is "alpha"
>>
>>20264563
I never exactly said when I read it, but yeah I've been lurking here again to up my pimp game now that I'm 21 and in college.
>>
>>20264189
>I know I have no game but how do you even speak to someone like this?
You don't.
>>
Same shit happenes to me half of the time on tinder, just delete it all dating apps are a fucking waste of time and life
>>
>>20264189
You should mirror someone’s interest in you. You failed when you sent her those texts again and again to uninterested replies, and you weren’t engaging her.

It made you seem desperate. Next time ask the girl relaxed questions to get to know her instead of coming at her with thought after thought of yours. She said “Eh” meaning she was reluctant, you should pick up on that and ask her why. Don’t just say “oh, you’re not excited for the weekend? WELL I AM. DO IT LIKE ME”, that turns the conversation a little weird and once it’s weird it’s hard to get out of it. If you’d asked her initially why eh, she could’ve said work. It could’ve turned into a what do you do, what do I do. Focus on genuine connection, not game, that can come across as tryhard.

Just ask people questions, meet them where they’re at. If she seems interesting to you, show her slight interest, but not in a desperate way. Act like you have other options, not in a rude way, just don’t make yourself desperate.

The girl in the OP might have talked to you if you’d asked her a question, maybe you guys could’ve related on a genuine level.

Then again maybe she matched with you because she thought if you had a certain personality you’d be a good match,t hat didn’t pan out, so she was just eh about the whole thing because she’d realized you weren’t a match.

If you could travel back in time, what advice would you give your younger self?
40 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20263816
You win some, you lose some.
>>
>>20263663
To sleep with all of those women I turned down for sex. That was fucking stupid.
Standards when it comes to sex is such a waste of time.
>>
Don't waste over 200$ on in game cosmetics
>>
>>20263663
1) Stop playing so many video games. Spend some of that time going to the gym.
2) Pick something and stick to it! Stop changing your goals so often because you won't accomplish any of them and you waste time.
3) Stop focusing on negative things. Life is not that bad.
4) Don't file for divorce! Your wife was fine and you should have worked more on the marriage.
>>
>>20263663
Dont try to study good in school. It doesnt matter as uni is just HS on steroids and your efforts will be in vain.

File: 004536 2212 X9X.jpg (116 KB, 800x1149)
116 KB
116 KB JPG
Good Evening Anonymous! It's Sunday night again! Got a problem with sex and relationships? Job driving you up the wall? Maybe you'd just like to rant! Maybe you'd just like to stop by and say hello! You can do all of that here!
115 replies and 51 images omitted. Click here to view.
>>
File: MNTS 443 6656 0.jpg (58 KB, 688x720)
58 KB
58 KB JPG
>>20264505
But now you are aware of it. And you know what to expect when you're in different moods. Now you know when you're most likely to be approached. I must say, I don't know of a way to change it. But I don't think it's gonna cause any serious problems..
>>
>>20263443
There's a girl I've had a crush on for a long time I've seen for the first time in ages recently. I'm seeing her again soon and I'd like to ask her out, but in a few months I'm going to be living in another state for a little under a year, but I'd still prefer to ask her now because I don't want to come back and have her be in a relationship, selfish as that may be. We get along well, but I have no idea if she's interested in me romantically or not. Any advice for this situation? I'm next seeing her tomorrow and would like to ask her out then, but am still thinking about it.
>>
>>20264584
I say, go for it! Just make sure she knows you'll be moving out of state. Just be truthful, and sincere!
>>
File: op need slep.gif (1.51 MB, 656x368)
1.51 MB
1.51 MB GIF
It's Zero Dark Thirty here in Op City. Bedtime for me! I strongly suggest we all get snuggly and get some good sleeps! I will check in tomorrow some time. If we get pruned or archived, I'll be back next Sunday! Goodnight Anonymous, wherever you are!
>>
>>20264609
Yeah, I think I should give it a shot. Thanks friendo.

How the fuck do you talk to women if approaching them is seen as weird now a days and dating apps just attract the worst people who have what the fuck is the solution?
>>
>>20264708
I don't know I guess we just don't talk to women at all because everything is weird and unfair and the whole world is against us. Guess we should just kill ourselves because there's no hope in anything.
>>
>>20264708
It's a state of mind. if you think girls are going to find you weird then you are exactly right. If you know you're handsome and god's gift to women then you're also exactly right. But you have to know it in yourself, you can't just act like it with no confidence, otherwise you'll come across as narcissistic and therefore weird.

how do famous people get off probation and shit without doing it?

is it because they're rich for lawyers or is it because they make millions of dollars and their job is too important for stupid bull shit
12 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20264730
he literally just explained it retard
>>
>>20264466

my sibling did some bad shit. not felony level but I know he was around people who went to jail but he never did. and I also realize my grandfather was a politician and my uncle a laywer and these people are well connected. he got in trouble but never any jail like the others.

but you know celebrities do go to jail. they just get much shorter sentences or community service. some get life if there is too much against them. family of a lawyer? that's the real ticket.
>>
>>20264730
A good lawyer has connections; expert witnesses, private investigators, judges, prosecutors. They're able to put together defenses and strategize with resources that regular lawyers don't. They have the time, staffing and resources to to file appeals, search for loopholes, typos, or holes in the case and introduce all sorts of motions that can significantly slow a case down for prosecutors and make their job more difficult. The difference is night and day. Additionally, prosecutors are more likely to go for plead down when they know that if they don't a really good lawyer is going to do everything they can to slow the case down and be a giant pain in their ass.
>>
>>20264466
Sup snow niggs. What you up to fool?
Still think there’s some motha fuckin secret to getting out of this shitshow of a life that you’ve created?

Work on your motha fuckin tapes nigga.
>>
>>20264746
oh ok i see chief keef got the same crime as me and got off with nothing at all they reduced his to a violation or something and it was a felony

I hope I can get off probation early or something im not technically sentenced yet but I dont think there's much I can do and my state gives the same punishment for any crime its years of probation for literally any crime and its the standard no more or less. I think maybe they can get you one year less or something but this is a small town like I said. no pull no jesus lawyers nothing. maybe a really good lawyer could get it lowered to unsupervised probation or something

I have been dating her since late december last year. We started talking on November and just immediately clicked. We don't have much in common though.

So around chrismas, we werent official yet. We were exclusive to eachother but werent official. Somewere around 21-25th she cheated. She slept with her best friend who lived a row behind her. She sneaked back into her house.

What stings is I was staying up to talk to her. And while she was having sex with him, she would take breaks and would talk to me then, basically talking to me during breaks.

She said she did this because she wasn't serious and was playing around. So fast forward and we made it official on new years. The first few weeks was great. We talked and talked and knew more about eachother. Then, early February she was diagnosed with lupus (SLE, autoimmune disease) and was bleak. She said that she realized that she had feelings for me and she didnt want that. So she went to the same guy, and fucked him.

This was during Valentines. At night ofcourse. What stings is she posted on her instagram "Happy Valentines my love" with a picture of me after coming back home from his place.

Ever since then, every month she'd just tell she wants to break up. I refused and begged her to stay to work this out.

This goes on until about august, when she told me.

Anon, I've never felt so broken in my life. This hurts more than finding out that my dad died and I didn't even know he was dying. I've never felt so dead

Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
71 replies and 4 images omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>>20260255
>>
>>20263854
Any word from her? What happened exactly?
>>
making a broken toy work is the ultimate exercise in pointlessness, yes if you bust out the epoxy and the PVC tape the toy might resemble and perform at a level very close to the one at the time of its apex and pride, but if the toy keeps breaking after you've expunged more money into it than it costs, you have to very seriously consider if you've been using your tools wrong or if the toy was destined to be broken from the beginning

you see, if a toy breaks and all the king's men cannot put it back together again, then you must make amends and just let it go, think of the good times you've had with the toy and realize that you have grown beyond it, that your attempts to fix the toy, although unsuccessful, are already enough for this situation, that you have done the best you can and that you should move on

don't let a toy be your life long project, OK? there's nothing stopping you from doing that, but think very deeply about whether or not you want that to be the thing that haunts you from now to forever.
>>
>>20264262
Nope, blocked her. Her friends did text me

"Wtf did you do"
"Dude you broke her"
"What did she even do"

do I tell em boys?

>>20264296
Could not have been put into words more perfectly. Thanks anon. <3
>>
>>20264479
Yep, you tell them. Fuck her up for us. She didn't deserve you.

What did she say before? Did you break up or what?

Hey /adv/ 23 female here bored at home trying to figure out what’s wrong with me...

I have a BF that I love and haven’t actually cheated on, but I love to come on 4chan normally post on /b/ and post pics of myself , ask everyone what they want to see and so forth. My BF and I have great sex but I love to post my pics on /b/ normally do it before we have sex to work myself up and it makes me feel even more naughty taking pics while he’s in the other room.
Is there something wrong with me?
15 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>hasn't posted pics yet
>>
>>20264210
>he’s shy
Try to get him fuck you with mirrors around, see if he likes to seeyou and himself from a diferent angle and thus slowly ease him into banging on camera.
If he likes it but is still too shy, shoot it in Bane masks.
>>
>>20264172
Your boyfriend deserves a much better person in his life desu.
>>
>>20264749
this. You're not literally cheating on him but you're still breaching his trust by sharing your body with other men. If I found out my gf did that I'd strongly consider breaking up.
>>
>>20264172
Sounds healthy to me.

File: 8allp1fj56m01.jpg (96 KB, 638x749)
96 KB
96 KB JPG
If you're a complete loser than of course women have it easier cause you can just marry and leech from someone But now let's look at a successful person.

They graduate valedictorian and go to Harvard. This is extremely attractive to women, completely irrelevant compared to looks for men. They become a world famous researcher. Same thing again. Own a paid off house at 25, same thing again.

Then to top it off women's looks fade, they have a time limit for having children and are expected to look after children more. Completely ruins their career, meanwhile for men it's expected they work on their career. Even little things like men being expected to pay for dates, it's just treating them like they're incompetent losers incapable of affording it.

In conclusion while you're young for the bottom 20 percent of success, being female it's far better, 20-50 slightly better, 50-60 same, 60-85 beibg male is slightly better, 85-95 being male is far better, 95-99 being make it's ridiculously better, top 1 percent of general success and it's miles better than being a female supermodel
209 replies and 12 images omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20264677
>Case in point. Look how she doesn't even realize it.
I'm a man and this isn't an answer.

>free food and drinks and attention and education and jobs and more.
Where in the fuck have you been where restaurants and colleges just hand out free food and tuition for women just because they're women? What planet do you live on?
>>
>>20264687
Tons of bars frequently have nights dedicated to giving women free drinks. The reason women are the majority of college graduates is because there's been a huge push to give away as many scholarships as possible to women.

As for the rest of the free stuff, they get it from men. That's the dynamic we have in society. Men give, women take.
>>
>>20264700
>Tons of bars frequently have nights dedicated to giving women free drinks.
I've never been to any of these bars but you know, sure, I'm sure it exists somewhere.

>The reason women are the majority of college graduates is because there's been a huge push to give away as many scholarships as possible to women
Well that's definitively and provably false. Next.

>As for the rest of the free stuff, they get it from men
Which men? I don't give away any "free stuff" nor do I know any guys that do. Answer me this; have you ever actually been on a date with a girl?
>>
>>20264677
Men are more likely to get jobs than women. No one is going around giving women free food and drinks and attention and education unless they’re like supermodels.
>>
File: male female scholarships.jpg (1.8 MB, 1825x2069)
1.8 MB
1.8 MB JPG
>>20264718
>I've never been to any of these bars but you know, sure, I'm sure it exists somewhere
Not my fault you're stupid. Google "ladies drink free night" and you'll find bars everywhere that do it.

>Well that's definitively and provably false. Next.
Source: Your ass.
Meanwhile heres an actual comparison for how many scholarships exist only for women vs only for men. I dare you to find any gender-neutral place that lists more for men. You won't of course.

>Which men?
Men like you. You give women free attention. That's what you're doing when you do your precious "talking to them". You give them free attention, women don't have to give men free attention. When you take them on your precious dates you provide them free entertainment, and free whatever else you do on the date (a free meal, a free movie, however much you feel like giving her).

And you know what else women get for free? Free whiteknights like you, literally everywhere ready to defend them and stroke their egos for free 24/7.

Guys my cousin is 15 years old. What does this mean, I’ve asked him multiple times to stop texting me so much. I understand he looks up to me and loves me, my family tells me all the time but this is ridiculous. I’m 20 years old btw. Posting more screenshots so you guys understand.
76 replies and 15 images omitted. Click here to view.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwXoW_lizvo
>>
>>20262615
It's cute that he looks up to you like that, but you're going to have to explain to him how texting you so much makes him looks retarded. Of course in a much nicer way than that.

Has he been diagnosed with OCD?
>>
>>20262848
It seems like cousinposter is a sperg, who has learned a rudimentary way to communicate with someone he looks up to, but has not learned any social limits on how to behave. He won't stop until you tell him. He cannot understand by himself why you aren't responding, and keeps trying to get your attention. Basically he's an overly clingy girlfriend.
>>
Hey bro
>Hey bro
Hey bro
>Hey bro
Hey bro
>Hey bro
>>
>>20263248
Fag blockposter. What are you afraid of speaking in sentences rather than in monologues you sperglet?

File: burning_bush.jpg (432 KB, 800x1000)
432 KB
432 KB JPG
I can't readily exercise self-control because I haven't quite mapped out what my "self" is. Independent of any details of my current situation or peculiar quirks that I can bore you with, my problem is that I don't know which part of my mind is in charge of carrying out any task I can think of. I know the stream of inner thought with which I constantly talk to myself, but I feel if that were the end-all be-all of my consciousness, thinking the words "I will talk to my boss and ask for a raise" would be enough to make it so. Instead there is a central underlying force that wills for my inner voice to be transferred directly to type but not to speech, that will decide whether I have stayed up late enough given the time I'm supposed to go into work, that will choose to completely freeze my vocal functions when confronted with that cute girl I've been meaning to ask out for months, even if my inner voice has reasoned that she would still say yes even after all this time. In order to grab life by the balls and make something of myself, I must first grab this force by the balls. I don't get how: it isn't anything I can physically grab being as much part of me as my voice, and being part of myself I feel like I should already be in control of it, yet here I am allowing myself to write a post on /adv/ when I should be sleeping in order to wake up in time for work. How do I conceptualize this force? Are there any techniques to ease this kind of dissociation? Just how far along is psychiatric medicine to be able to identify what this phenomenon is?

File: 1696899.png (27 KB, 512x512)
27 KB
27 KB PNG
I've been getting a few matches but sometimes the girls have fuck all in their bio. How the fuck do i start and maintain a conversation with them?

Also feel free to share your experiences, tips, advice, etc.
37 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20263011
but you won't know which ones until you talk to them
>>
File: 1540497280511.gif (1.96 MB, 200x109)
1.96 MB
1.96 MB GIF
>>20263103
>same height 166cm
>manlet
How the fuck do you get higher than 25% match chance? I feel like mine is barely 5%
>54 dates
Id prolly killed myself if i couldnt get stuff done after 10 dates holy shit
>>
>>20262484
>I've lost count how many times i thought things were going great when they stopped responding, or cancelled the date. This pattern was bad for my mental health and confidence.
Totally. I met this cute girl, we had an amazing chat with tons of laughter, agreed on a date to meet at the mall and then she unmatched me the morning before. Her last text was literally "haha you are so funny". God that wrecked me so hard.
>>
>>20263103
120% based, well done anon, I love this stuff
>>
File: 1539967920352.jpg (58 KB, 634x606)
58 KB
58 KB JPG
>>20263103
>54 dates
How are you not dead inside? I would not be able to handle half of that unless i could apply a programmed script brah

File: Fairey_Swordfish.jpg (128 KB, 600x339)
128 KB
128 KB JPG
>just broke up with gf because i felt like we weren't compatible enough to be together and i lost feelings for her
>still feel like shit after
why
>>
cuzyuraloneagain
>>
>>20263524
Can I ask what led to loss of feelings? Like how did you begin to act once you were losing feelings? Were you no longer attracted to her as well?
>>
>>20263524
your human
>>
How long were you guys together?
>>
>>20263524
It means you have a heart. Doesn’t mean it wasn’t the right choice. Take care of yourself.

File: 51yIzSxXmEL._SS500.jpg (40 KB, 500x500)
40 KB
40 KB JPG
I feel like I'm that peripheral friend that people enjoy being around but never really reach out to and doesn't really 'belong'. I always make people laugh and they seem to enjoy being around me and are more than happy to have me along when I make an effort but I'm not really 'In' the group if that makes sense. Like I won't get an invite to big events like camping trips, and I'm usually the last guy to get invited to events if they even remember me, unless I make an effort. It's like they never think to invite me or I'm not really part of like the core. This always leads me to having a lot of friends but no real 'connections' or deeper friendships. I'm just so sick of being the clown and not really belonging anywhere. Any ideas on why this may be and how I can change it?
4 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20264037
Hell yeah dude, ever since I first listened to his Alien Boy EP I've been hooked. Hoping he releases another EP or a full length album soon.

>>20264044
I do at times but I'm really not trying to feel like I'm intruding and just be a clown to entertain everyone. When we do chill I'm included but it still feels like I'm just there to put on a performance and make them laugh. It's the making genuine connections and feeling like I'm part of the group I struggle with. And it just feels shitty to be an afterthought and have to ask to be invited to everything.
>>
>>20264016
Eventually, you'll BECOME that person. First thing you gotta accept is that you might ACTUALLY end up alone for a while if your friends don't care about you and it'll take time to find quality friends. Remember 1 quality freind equals 1000 shit friends. And also, you gotta become comfortable being by yourself. Constantly needing other people just to feel fulfilled is borderline parasitic and not a healthy mindsite.
Not giving a fuck isn't about ignoring that THEY are doing. It's about becoming so invested in yourself that others become thought in the back of your head.
Listen, when was the last time you worked out? Or learned another language? Or cooked something new?
When you become interesting people will become interested in you. Until then just work on improving yourself and don't worry about other people.
>>
>>20264114
Yeah I suppose you're right, it's just the idea of having no friends really fucks with me and makes me feel hopeless. But I need to be about myself before people are about me. I don't know it's so lame, but I've always just wanted to be cool and have everyone like me, I feel like Micheal from The Office sometimes LOL.

But I really think you're right, I need to start just being about myself and do what I want first without worrying about entertaining others and being liked.
>>
>>20264077
he's dropped that he's been working on another EP or album, i forget which. but there is another project of his that should be coming out soon. he did something weed related with viceland i think recently that was promoting an upcoming project (kinda).

also if you feel like the peripheral friend, maybe the groups of people you've been hanging around with aren't the best group of people for you. not every one is going to vibe with everyone else and that is okay. it seems like you got some major self esteem and anxiety problems so you might be trying with the first group of people who are nice. i think it would be important to work on whatever is the root cause of your anxiety and you'll get better from there.
>>
>>20264591
Oh shit that's sick I'm hyped. I know he's touring with Hobo Johnson right now til like mid January. Hopefully after that he'll drop some new stuff.

I definitely think you're right with the self-esteem and anxiety issues needing to be tackled first. I do appreciate my friends a lot and they do reach out at times, I think it's the self-esteem issues that keep me from pursuing it more since I feel like I need to play a character and worry I can't do it. I really appreciate the insight man, thanks.

File: 1529819232325.png (248 KB, 500x487)
248 KB
248 KB PNG
I'm trying to lose weight but today I was weak and stupid and ate 3000 calories should I vomit this up I'm so stupid and weak.
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20264604
I know
I need to try harder
I'm an awful person
>>
>>20264619
You're not an awful person you just need to learn better self control. Power's out so you eat dinner out, okay sure, that doesn't mean you need to eat all the other junk too. One bad meal won't ruin the whole diet. Letting one bad meal turn into a whole day into a whole week WILL ruin the whole diet.
>>
>>20264625
Ok.
I'm just so bad at refusing food if people offer it
>>
>>20264633

>"I just ate, sorry. But if you've got tea/coffee/whatever, that would be great."

Easier to refuse, if you keep yourself busy with something else?
>>
>>20264553
No, but you must now drink 32 ounce of water and for for a walk.




Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.