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Is there truly a "poblem" with me hating people? I absolutely do.i am not trying to be edgey.i wish i was but i am not. Every person i have ever met has ethier exploited my insecurities,insulted me to on a spiritual level,cheated on me,or has told me to throw away my dreams.it never stops with them.all i can ever think about when a persom talks to me is brutaly hurting them or killing them.the only time ive met a "good" person is when i met my grandmother.i personly dont think i should change becuase through trial and error i have learned that i can not trust them or be friends with them.not even on a vague level.i can not even force myself to lie to them.i try to lie them,but i can't.not for second can i.am i in the wong here,or do they deserve it?
>>
>>17305916
Well i have a lovehate relationship with humans. But i don't expect all to be good, nobody's a saint including you. However there are a few that are just blatantly evil. But i try to see the good in everybody anyway, you never know what they've been through. Just like you seem to have been through a lot and that's why you're the way you are. Just keep that in mind. You're not wrong for the way you feel, just try to give everyone a chance first
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>>17305949
That is indeed thing.i give everyone a chance and they end up doing something terrible with said chance.i want to think people are good but like i said it always turns out way worse than what i bargained for.it is like geting a dog and then the dog turns out to be a pedophile.
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>>17305959
Pedophile dogs...beautiful. And this has been EVERYBODY you've ever encountered?
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>>17306029
Yes.Its just a non stop barrage of fiends and sexual deviants.i can't not meet a bad person.

Do women actually like guys that are chill and easy to get along with? looking back on my relationships, women seem to get bored because im really relaxed about most things. I notice, guys that are kind of dickish but entertaining get the most girls. i dont really want to act this way because i feel like an asshole and its not me.
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>17305961
Isn't that even more boring?
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>>17305957
i do take the lead when it comes to most things, i just dont try to have sex unless its clear because if i dont, women asssume i just want to use her for sex. how do i be more assertive? do i tell them what to do? i kind of feel like a dick if i just tell people what to do. im probably socially retarded when it comes to relationships due to lack of experience. thanks for the reply though
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>>17305961
i hate this though lol. i get so bored, and i just feel like going home, and the women isnt putting in any effort. i feel like i am talking to a child. the only women i didnt have to be like this with was an older women who i was seeing for a little while.
>>
dont know lads. seems like women like me at first and then after about a month they are like "i dont feel a connection anon, you are a great guy but my heart isnt in this"
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>>17305968
It's only boring if you ask boring questions, or don't ask follow up questions. It's not an interview. You should have fun responding/reacting to whatever she's talking about.

>>17305970
Not sure whether your problem is getting girls' number/getting them home, or if it's what to do in bed. Be assertive as in don't question your own intent, act as if you're right about what you're doing/saying. Allow yourself to be unaffected by disagreement. Learn to tease. If a girl tells you her favourite thing is vanilla coke, tell in a laughing voice that you hate vanilla coke, and ask her if she likes cod oil as well. I was once on a first date with a woman I had been very suggestive with over text game prior to the date, and I pressed her softly against the wall, got really close, looked her straight in the eyes and told her that she'd never met anyone like me before, and she agreed. Shortly after I made her come twice in a row - which if course 'was something that never happens to her'
If I told people to go out and try this a lot of people would just call it creepy, but the difference between creepy and charming is not the act in and of itself, but context, of which an assertive attitude and the ability to laugh at one self is a huge part. You can be chill, but why so serious?

>>17305975
If they are unresponsive and can't impress you with anything, just move on to the next.

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Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.

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Not sure what to do, went on social network this morning. Had a message from my ex (we broke up in 2013) cant even really call him an ex we went on like two dates and talked on the phone due to long distance. Any way I didn't ever truly feel fully attracted to him, so called it a day to save him getting to invested and being let down massively. So got with my partner were super happy, loads In common its like her was created in a lab to my specifications haha! So any way back to the point. Get a message off this guy telling me hes so sorry he fucked shit up, and hopes he could make it better, but said he thought id have moved on because someone as amazing and beautiful as me couldn't stay single long. I chose to block and ignore the message, but told my fella. I now feel so guilty and awful, hes understandably hurt and upset, but I don't know what to do. I wanted to be honest with him and not hide secrets, because if he ever did find out about it, it would look suspect that I hadn't told him right? But now I feel like I've crushed his world. Basically I dont know how to put it right....told him how much I love him, and explained this guy meant nothing to me, but has any one got any advice as to what I could do to make this right?
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>>17305934
Unless you're an overemotional fop who wasn't very good at keeping to plans or schedules, it's bad luck.
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>>17305979
The first step would be unblocking the first guy and telling him properly that you're not interested. If he insists, then block him, but blocking without answering is just being a piece of shit.
>he's understandably hurt and upset
There is nothing understandable about it. Some guy wanted to go out with you, you stopped it before it even started, you've done nothing wrong in this regard. You didn't even need to tell your BF, but told him anyway, just so he's in on it. Either ask your boyfriend to explain what his problem is or just give up and wait for him to get over his bitchfit.
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>>17302256
I would definitely take his opinion into consideration, since it's his hypothetical child as much as mine, but currently I definitely don't want a kid in my life. If I had a boyfriend I'd tell him that before we ever got intimate though, and should he want a kid I suppose we wouldn't work out.
Trickier if I got pregnant accidentally and suddenly he does want to keep it. I'd say I would get an abortion all the same, might ruin my relationship but that's a decision I have to take.
Obviously I wouldn't want (or even demand) him to pay for anything related to the whole business.
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>>17305244
1: lift her up
2: into the trash she goes

Any advice to stop procrastination so I can start living my god damn life?
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>17305895
Not OP, but I appreciate your post in my current situation. You just made me set up a to-do list for the day, which I was in great need of.
>>
Just start doing something you like or have to do, dont think about it
>>
Train yourself.

First off, instant gratification. Get rid of it.
Entertainment, internet, porn, video games... Out the window for now.

Yeah, it sucks shit, but when you're sitting there bored off your ass and staring at a clock, you'll start to realize just how much time you have, and just how much time you waste doing nothing.

Well shit, you don't have instant gratification anymore to satiate you, and YOU HAVE THE WILLPOWER TO NOT CAVE IN, so you might as well do something at this point to improve your situation. You've got a long list of shit to do, and it isn't getting any shorter.

You're taking time from what you want to do in order to avoid doing what you don't want to do. You're escaping into unfulfilling mediums in order to distract your mind from the parts of your life that you need to fix.

It's like lifting weights, or training your body for extreme cold weather conditions. It's starts off as, "Fuck, this sucks." and ends like, "That was pretty good. I wonder how much better I can do?"

That's real gratification. That's progress.
>>
>>17305942

I agree with this sentiment. This is just how I got more done in a day, OP.

I used to feel like, fuck, I just can't find the time to do all this shit. But then when I cut out video games, television, and dicking around with magic cards, I had enough time to get every fucking thing done before 3 pm.

I was just so used to inserting leisure activities into my day. I would do one productive thing, but then I would have to spend time goofing off somehow.

Now I go from finishing one task directly into starting the next task. No break. No letting up. Just hit it hard. There is still that moment of hesitation, but it's easy to push through it and once you've started the next task, you realize it isn't so bad. Doing work is almost never as bad as it seems it will be. Somehow our ability to estimate how much of a chore work will be has become warped, and so everything seems like climbing a mountain.

If ever I start something and, holy fuck, it really is like climbing a mountain, then it's fine for me to stop and change my game plan and schedule. But I demand of myself that I just dive in and get started and see how hard it really is, first, because I know I just can't trust my perception.

Also, and this is maybe kinda stupid, but it has helped me when I slip into procrastination mode: Having a sort of hero or role model that you can focus on can really help you get moving. At least for me. I spend some time thinking about a hard working writer that I admire, and I think that on some level it kind of makes me pretend that I am him, or something like that, and that makes it easier for me to break my not-working inertia and get started. It's like I borrow motivation from someone else, or rather, my concept of that someone. Then, once I have my own inertia, I can generally keep it going on my own, if I am vigilant at it.
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>>17305562
Try www.habitica.com.
It's a "to do" webpage, but it gives you points when you do it, like an RPG
Don't report me for spam pls xD

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Had some differences with my bf and i can't go back to our normal, loving relationship anymore. What has caused that and how can i get over it?

>we had some different opinions on how appropriate it is that he's still close friends with his ex

>differences got honestly discussed in a calm approach

>since then i feel distant and indifferent towards him
>stuff i formerly found adorable now annoys the shit out of me (mainly lovey dovey things like he telling me how much he loves me, extensive cuddling and such)
>when i get a text from him i don't even want to read it
>we still have sex, but it's abysmal (i was always very enthusiastic and horny 24/7. Now i just want it to get over with and also, i suddenly get disgusted with his "bodily fluids". I noticed that i'm even trying to avoid kissing him...)

I feel so very bad about this. Note that i don't act on those feelings. I'm still kissing him, telling him how much i love him and so on. After all, on paper, our differences got resolved. Pls help me find out what's the matter with me and how i can get our old ways back again...
>>
are you stupid

break up
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>>17305946
It's not that easy. We move in together in two weeks. I already cancelled the contract to my apartment. And also, i really want to resolve this and not just run away as soon as things get a little bumpy. Ofc it has crossed my mind...
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>>17305951
DON'T move in with him it will not get better. No partner should have to have the chat about the ex. If the person you are with is so insensitive to not recognize any boundaries when they enter another relationship and commit to that person you cannot convince them of it. I understand some people may want to remain friends with an ex but the insistence that ex maintain the same place in their life is untenable. Friends/acquaintance ok, but "close" friends, no.
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>>17306013
Yes. I know that. I vioced my opinion. The ex got removed for good. My question is mainly why this has hurt me SO much that it drove me away so completely. He didn't cheat on me. And he pretty much instantly broke contact after i have toldh him how i feel about the situation. I have come to the conclusion that it damaged my trust in his love. But he shows me he has choosen me and loves me very much, every day. So it can't only be that. I also feel like i was very hurt because i felt like i can't compeed against that ex for various reasons (one being that they broke up on "good terms" and that she was the girl he crushed on during all his school years. She was his first everything too.)

I just want to find a way to feel loving towards him again...

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>obsessing over a slut

Please help
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Whores gonna whore. You've learned a valuable lesson about the true nature of women, now use this information to go out and get laid. If you can't do that, sit and suffer until the next oneitis comes along. You can also call her out on this and try to make her feel bad. This beats sitting around feeling cucked all day and you might even get some pussy out of it, at the very least you can amuse yourself while talking to her one last time, since whatever relationship you had with her is over.
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Picture her getting fucked that'll knock it off.
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>>17305710
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>>17305802
Red pill autist detected.
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>>17306011
only good advice in the thread desu

How do I get my boyfriend to be more open about watching porn/masturbating?

I used his laptop recently and saw in his history his porn. When I asked him about it, he denied denied denied, "Who put that there, who used my laptop, wasn't me, no way". I've found his used tissues in the bedroom and asked him to be tidier when jerking it, "I wasn't masturbating!! Are you sure those aren't from when we has sex!?" I watch porn myself and masturbate often (read: daily) and am open and not shy with him about it.

I want him to know he can be honest with me and I won't be upset, or mad, in fact it kinda turns me on. He doesn't hide it, but he denies watching it and even jerking off. The porn he watches isn't anything crazy, and I'd be more than willing to put it on and even act it out while watching it together. How do I get him to be more open about it with me?

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Started my period at 8 nothing out of the weird there,"Be regular", "keep track so you won't be surprised", and my favorite "always carry extra supplies" but I never got the concept that something like that could sneak up on someone.
Later down the road I was asked how often I bleed "like once maybe twice always year". Got pulled to the principals office big investigation over if I was abused, how, and why I didn't tell anyone.
"I'm not abused"
After After a few months they drop it.
Years go by only a few friends know I've been "gifted" only bleeding at most twice twice a year. I played sports and just lived my life.

4 years ago something happened. I woke up with an awful headache and I was pooled in blood started freaking out that in got stabbed and slept through it (?). I went to the my PCP and she yelled at me for not telling her that I don't bleed. Sent me to a specialist who told me i can't have children. Whatever i don't like kids. Never explained the blood or why I can't have kids.

A year later headache again. Blood again. Literally peeing black from all the blood. Go to ER. I do a lot of testing and scans. They tell me that obviously there its blood In my urine but they can't figure it out and think i should just go home. Went home to tired to fight.

I now get very very ill about every 3-4 months. Fever, vomiting, joints aching, blood vessels bursting all over my eyes, skin turns red and puffy.

I have been to so many doctors and come up empty I'm so tired guys. My poor husband is so stressed and I don't want him to be that way anymore. He takes such good care of me.
Please. Can someone tell me what is going on.
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
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>>17305837
I live in the southern U.S. Swimming, long distance track, soccer, and tennis. All I know is that there was a lot of blood. I didn't really dig around to figure it out the first time the second they told me it was vaginal. They always go together. First the blood then the horrible sickness. Occasionally they are coupled with complete and total sleeplessness for up to 3 days.
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>>17305434
Have you had in investigative laparoscopy? Sounds like severe endometriosis to me, the eye trouble is puzzling me though........potentially blood pressure related due to the rapid blood loss in a shot period / stress to the bodily system.
>>
Medfag here . 2 to 3 times a year menstration is textbook/classic anovulation and/or chronic anovulation that's changed into presenting symptoms similar to abnormal/dysfunctional uterine bleeding.

The remaining symptoms do point to something else going on..the one anon who mentioned endometriosis made a solid call. It does fit the symptoms described. Unfortunately OP, theres only a handful of things to do to determine it . Pelvic exam, ultrasound, laproscopy...and a few lab results just to rule out other oddities. Your PCP should have discussed this with you. If not, you need to get a referral to an obgyn
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>>17305891
Actually no I haven't I will definitely look into this. Thanks
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>>17305913
I've since changed PCP due to some residential changes. I'm hoping to find one in my current area that will over look my age and actually do the tests instead of writing it off because I'm young. But yes definitely that should have happened but I am going to look into a laproscopy to see if that will help determine what in the world is going on.

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I'm just going to greentext this shit
>Moved in with brother
>everything's pretty okay we have fun and it's fun living with a sibling.
>I'm a clean person and he always says he is
>Doesn't clean his dishes or takes five to eight days to do so and then there's always big fucking pile of dishes.
>Doesn't do his shores or takes really fucking long time.
>okay, I'm going to ask him nicely about it.
>I asked nicely and he just started to say "shut the fuck up" and all that shit.
>I have a bad temper and it hurt me, so I start yelling and because none of us like to really fight we just yell a little and go to our rooms.
>Because of our family we don't talk things thru, we just "forget" it and next day everything is okay.
>This happens couple of times.
>Couple of times he started to nag me but eventually I did my chores even tho I did his too.
>But this time. This one fucking time.
>I'm so angry.
>I do my chores, which is way more than his.

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Hey /adv/, do guys like to be approached? I'm a girl 5/10. Asking because I've been doing a lot of waiting around lately in lines at Orlando and would like to strike up conversation to pass time and make friends. I'm scared of other girls.

Pic unlrelated
>>
>>17306027
im a guy and i like to be approached, though if a girl approached me and started talking to me, i would assume she wants to go out with me, not just be friends.
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>>17306027
Yes, guys like to be approached. It doesn't matter if you're a 5/10 or a 2/10, it's flattering, even if you're not attractive to that particular person.

Hello i need an advice from people who lives in sweden.

My name is Joanna and im coming to Sweden to start my new life. I dont know anything about sweden so im trying to do my "homework" and find out everything i can about sweden and life in there. What i need from you guys is a list of things for example: Where can i find a place to rent? Where should i look for job? How can i open a bank account? What are the main websites for job and renting place? Basically everything for a new life. Im looking on the internet as well but maybe someone in here could help me.

i have experience as a nurse in a hospital for over 25 years.

Thanks 4 chan.
>>
bump
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>>17305088
18+25...you're a 43 y/o nurse who can't manage her shit and posts on 4chan? Gtfo, troll

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When is it appropriate to hit people? If they offend you? Insult you? Attack you? Attack a friend?
>>
When they're physically threatening you/someone you care about. You don't get to hit people and have a tantrum because they said something that hurt your feels. You can be angry, you're supposed to have some level of control over your actions though.
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>>17306023
Whatever happened to "talk shit, get hit"?
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>>17306025
We became adults and gained some self control and responsibility.

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>some events lead me to meet this girl
>met her in person just once, didn't talk too much
>kept a very basic online comunication because we needed to plan some events
>meet her for such event and talk more
>I think I like her
>I'm kinda in a weird position (not gonna talk about it too much for the sake of anonimity)
>feel like I should be more of a caretaker than anything, if not a friend
>also she has a bf
>for the whole time we were togheter (with some friends) I had the feeling she would rather talk to them than to me
>had a good fun time nonetheless and had many chances to talk and we laughed a lot togheter

We spent only a few days togheter, so I'm not sure how I feel about her.
Later on we spoke online and she told me she couldn't understand if we liked her or not, because we were all so calm.

Also she has a bf and I don't wanna be that piece of shit.

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>>17305955
>Ok, so she might be leading you on

I don't there's anything happening right now.
We just had bit of contact and we're getting to know each other, I think it's even unlikely she would leave her bf.

I wanna see how things develop the next time, for the moment she got more close to one of my friends,
and I got kinda jealous.
This time I'm gonna be more open and see if we can get along more.

I dunno why the whole situation is getting to my mind so much.
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>>17305971
How can you be this clingy? Just drop the fucking bitch and move one, for fucks sake.
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>>17305976
I just think your reading too much into this for some reason.

You went from
>she not interested
to
>she's leading you
In a matter of a sentence.

I don't even fucking know this girl man, but still I'm FORCED to spend time with her for some very good reasons.
And I'm trying to figure out how I feel about her.
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>>17305996
So you're crushing on a girl you don't even know that well? Maybe you're not reading into the situation well enough.
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>>17306016
She's not even that good looking, but for some reason I'm interested in her.
And since I needed to act a certain way around her because I needed to judge her abilites for a task I wonder how she's gonna behave towards me the next time if I try to be more relaxed.

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i have a friend who uses drugs and i use drugs too, i hang out with him sometimes, he happened to be chilling with a girl who also does drugs, we somehow say hi and chat, we somehow exchange numbers, i get to know her for a month, i find out she has had 3 ex boyfriends, she told me she has had sex with them.

she is 22, i am a 26 year old hugless kissless virgin, should i settle for used goods or find a virgin qt girl?

i think i am going to stick to my robot roots and just cut her off, unfortunately for her she likes me

she had another man's dick in her mouth.... so the thought of that upsets me
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>>17305964
You should have fun with her, call it sex, call it chating with her, regardeless of what she had in her mouth.
And please, don't overvalue virginity, you'll feel the same when you don't have it.
>>
sigh
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>>17305964
>i am a 26 year old hugless kissless virgin
>should i settle for used goods

You're not the one who's settling.
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>>17306005
really original...
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>>17305964
It upsets you because you're an insecure little bitch. It's not the thought of you being with someone who is "tainted," it's the thought of you being with someone who may think you're a terrible lay.

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>ex broke up with me 4 months ago
>immediately start no contact
>we have some mutual friends so it was tough but I got over it
>no contact absolutely kills her
>he periodically sends drunk texts/messages asking to be friends but always sends some kind of apology the next day
>always ignore
>always messages for pointless/dumb shit, most of which I either dismiss or ignore
>we are going to be at the same club night next weekend
>want to try again with her because I still find her attractive and the circumstances are vastly different
>also don't want to embarrass myself

have I done everything right in order to try again? or have I fucked up by ignoring her all this time? also wtf do I do now
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
>>
But to answer your question, I can't say because you haven't given enough info. Just talk to her and be honest.
I still advise against even trying though.
>>
>>17305963
the purpose of no contact is two fold. Leave them scratching their head as she is doing and begin the process of detachment for yourself. You have not gone fully no contact because she can still reach you and you intend to be in a place you know she will be. You are playing a game and when you make another pitch she will know this and stomp on your heart again. Foolish
>>
Alright, let's do this.

I've done no contact with good results.
What you need to do is put yourself in the frame of mind where the situation you're in is a good situation. You must act as if nothing's wrong, and that means you need to forget that she's hurting. That means that if you contact her, you should be oblivious to her previous attempts, and reach her from a place where you aren't worried or concerned, but rather expect her to be happy - talk to her like you would talk to anyone you knew was enjoying their life and had room for you to be in it. Show no remorse. Come across as if life is good for the both of you.

It's a little late to start texting her before the club event, so you're probably best off just showing up with an open mind. Don't expect the club night to end in embrace, so if that doesn't happen just consider your then recent encounter something you can use later on - but only if things don't get salty. Try and be on your absolutely best behaviour, and don't drink too much. She should be the one approaching you, and if that happens your should move her to somewhere you can have a brief talk. If she starts asking about you not responding you should tell her that you've been really busy and had to sort your thoughts out, and that you thought that you would only make things more difficult for the both of you if you had started any conversations earlier on (which is true - it's part of the point of NC,) but tell her that she's been in your mind and you should both just enjoy the evening, no worries. Touch her waist and kiss her on the cheek and lead her to the dance floor to end the conversation.

What happens next drepends on body language, eye contact, smiles and wheyher you manage to make sure that you're just there to have a good time. Remember to talk to other people, and don't start orbiting her.

I hope this was somewhat useful. Feel free to modify the instructions, it's only meant to put you in the right mindset.
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>>17305978
The main issue with us was the distance, but as of a month ago she now lives within 3 miles of me (used to be 90~ or so)

I've spent a lot of time thinking and focusing on myself but I do think I can 'make it work' or whatever, despite it not being the best idea
>>
>>17306002
>I can 'make it work'
isn't that what got you here in the first place? You can want it but she didn't and broke up with you.


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