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3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Okay gramps. Time to take a nap and take your pills.
Fuck off whiper snapper, now go bring me grandpas Kentucky cough syrup!
Getting high is not going to help you not wetting the bed gramps. Let me get your diapers.

Generally smile, ask them questions about themself, talk about things they like & tease jokingly. Find some excuse to touch their hand/shoulder. If they respond positively then it's great.

Girls generally love confidence so that's a big part of flirting.
Average romcom features a feckless male protagonist as part of the comedy.

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Do I fall in love too easily?

Do any of you lads wake up hungover, thinking of that girl from the night before?
I obsess over every girl thst gives me even a hint of attention. I would not call that love.

So I accidentally ate two of these magnets. They're super small but kind of powerful. Am I fucked?
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Hospital now.
Spend the rest of the day calling yourself magneto and maybe go to the hospital.
One magnet is fine. It's if you swallow another magnet, or the pair you've already swallowed separate, that's where the problems come in. I think it would be wise to induce a bowel movement. I don't know if it'll make it move down faster or if it'll just clear your rectum, but hey. Keep yourself away from other magnets and metal stuff AND NEVER PUT MAGNETS IN YOUR MOUTH AGAIN
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damn, what a retard
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>im only 27
dude what the fuck

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Recently broke up and kept in contact, but by now I realized I can't handle that. I wanna know her whereabouts but I know I shouldn't. So I unfollowed her on facebook and also muted and archieved the convo (I don't want to block her, she's not a bad person) so I will only see her texts if I personally look her up again. Now i only did this about half a day ago and I'm not sure how I could keep this up. I'm afraid I might text her by an impulse. How can I keep my self-control?
I actually agree with her not wanting to be with me in my mind but I feel otherwise. I can get pretty fucking jealous, even though she's supposedly hooked up with a girl (I'm not a girl) How can I accept this emotionally?
I can't shut her out completely. Even if I break all social contact (which I really don't want) I will hear people near me mention her. I will get reminded by many basic things.
Ideally I'd prefer to get by myself for now and then maybe rekindle our relationship. She's such a cool person, I want to hang out with her.
So be cool and hang out with her.
Dont look back. Let time do what it needs to do, if destiny wants you back with her, destiny will have its way.

You must learn self control (she probably wont like clingy, weak men to begin with)
But most important; you need to learn to get rid of attachments.

Make a new life, new friends, visit new places, new activities, work on yourself.

Let the past die, kill it if you have to.
Erase your photos together, if you two wont ever be together anymore then it's no use, and if you do get back with her then you will take more, new and better pics.

I'm sorry, but I know exactly what kind of pain you are going throught. Man up, and make yourself the source of your hapiness, cause otherwise anything and anyone else will inevitably fail you at some point.

Sorry for grammar/spelling mistakes.
Wouldn't looking at the past and feeling nostalgia and accepting it as something that only happened there and then would be a better thing to do?
I don't want to forget the sweet memories together.

Any dudes ever date someone not as good looking as them, even though they could and have done better? I'm probably a 7.5/10 and this girl I was talking to for a while, looked like a 7/10 on her picture but in person she is much more plain looking like a 5.5/10 or something. But the catch is that she is absolutely unlike any girl I've ever met, she's absolutely amazing. I have always had pretty high standards when it comes to looks but she makes me want change that for once. Anybody been in similar situation?

Pick related Jon Snow is a much better looking dude then Ygritte is a girl
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
In life, you either choose to find beauty, or expect it to be presented to you.
My fiance is hot as shit, I am average at best and kind of chubby on top of that.
He loves me and has eyes just for me, together for 3 years, getting married soon.
Vagene and bobs to confirm.
>posting nudes on 4chan

One of the reasons why he loves me is that I am not too much of a dumb whore.
10/10 post

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SO basically I'm not smart (pretty stupid actually, and very lazy. I'm set to graduate with a degree in Finance from a not so good school (university of south florida) I used to want to attain my CFA and became involved with investments. However lately I have not performed well in school and have performed very bad socially (literally have never had any friends, and I'm horrible at having conversation) But my main question is what kind I do for a job that is easy in the finance world? I haven't been able to get an internship and only had one job which I quit after a week (I was a stock boy) for being told I wasn't doing a good job, All me life I've felt like I've just been a disappoint. I'm a short loser whose never been able to make friends, quit everything sports or hobby related, and have always done below average in school. At this point I've accepted I'm not going to be successfull during my lifetime and will always be miserable. Sorry for the poor me post but I'm just really fed up with how my life turned out, I'm 21 by the way.

what do i wanna explode
You could kill yourself, nigger

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>at security job
>driving security vehicle
>car in front me runs over cat
>not sure if its on purpose because they didnt shift position in the lane
>got it on dash cam
>didnt drive up to check license plate to avoid being confrontational

Is this worth reporting to the police?
no, killing a stray cat on accident isn't illegal
Well okay then.

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How do I find a female to talk to online?? I just want a female friend to talk to. I've tried soc and even r9k.

Everyone I talk to eventually either disappears, removes me, or one time I accidentally removed her and couldn't add her again and she couldn't add me.

I'm at a very lonely point in my life, I miss my friends, family and my ex. I just want someone to fill the void, someone to care about and to have them care about me.

Is there anyone like that here??
14 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Try words with friends
>newfag doesn't know what sage is
Post a picture+timestamp, I guarantee they don't like you because you're ugly. You're also never going to meet a girl off of this board, especially since you seem so retarded in your replies.
I somehow manage to befriend every girl that I have feelings for, but I can never get to a point where we're more than friends. Instead, I become their best buddy that they'll talk to about their latest date/crush. And I actually am being direct and honest about my intentions. I'm not sure if this is better than being all alone. Wish I could help you, man.
I fap to Shadbase and larp as a female online and manage to get attention
Seriously, get over yourself. Once you manage to realize you're the center of fucking nothing, and nothing revolves around you, you'll learn that it really is about the journey.
A predictable loon like you is obsessed with the destination. It's impossible to talk to you outside of your level and girls probably get tired of watching you fall into predictable patterns and simplistic behaviors.

I mean, you clearly need a friend, support-- and even now you must sow your discontent by demanding it be a woman. Because titties. Why has your life become so basic? Stop investing so much of yourself into people and hinging all this pressure on them. They barely know you, dude.

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Help please.

Does a vital statistics form hold my information or the decedents? I'm cureently stationed in South Korea and i need to get my father over before i come because i only have so much time before i come back. Also, if it requires my info, does that mean i need to make the armed forces part about me or him? I couldn't even tell if the occupation part was for him or not. I thought this was supposed to help me get him from the health investigators to the funeral home, but idk. Trying tonsend this back rn, but everybody is asleep in the states.
2 replies omitted. Click here to view.
So wait, you're trying to have remains brought out to South Korea for burial? Huh. Never heard of that.

I half wonder if they sent you the wrong form. Because it looks to me like the sort of form you'd use to report a servicemember's death and arrange for the transport of his remains back stateside, rather than (what I gather you're trying to do) have someone else's remains sent to South Korea for services there.
why are you asking a Tibetan goat herding forum this?
Nah man, so he lives in new mexico and killed himself, so he's with health investigators, i am only child. I need his remains to go to the funeral home.

But yeah maybe they did. I feel stupid and i don't have the experience to know how tf to fill it out and it's 2 am in the states rn.
Because it's an adv board, maybe someone knew, idk.
Oh jeez. Yeah I completely didn't get what you were talking about.

You know what man, you need to call up either the funeral home or the medical examiner office tomorrow and ask what you need to do. I get the impression that form you have is just for your father's information, and you're the "informant".

But honestly the funeral home should be holding your hand through this. That's what they're fucking supposed to do.

Sorry about your loss man.

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Earlier today, I saw an anon post that a boy has to become a man whereas a girl passively becomes a woman by aging. Despite being a very feminine woman (honestly, despite what I'm about to tell you) I realize I have embarked on a path of self realization that is more classically masculine than feminine.

I believe it was influenced by growing up in a dysfunctional family and town and wanting to escape my circumstances and to not fall into those patterns myself. I decided long ago that I wouldn't date at all until I felt I had become a more ideal version of myself and therefore a more ideal partner to have a family. Now I'm there but I'm wondering - as a man, how would you feel about dating a woman who had embarked on such an unusual life path? I am not bragging about this - despite being proud of my accomplishments and of where and who I am today I realize this makes me a bit strange.

Details about what this has meant for me:
- Obtaining several college degrees.
- Being educated in current events, philosophy and other topics I consider important to be well rounded.
- Starting my own business and becoming independently wealthy enough to support both myself and my family.
- Perfecting several feminine skills like cooking and cleaning and even putting myself through culinary school to get better at cooking.
- Obtaining a high level of physical fitness so that I could successfully pass several physical benchmarks I'd set for myself, as well as attaining and maintaining the ideal body type for me (more toned than the average female but decidedly feminine and not buff.)
- And possibly the craziest sounding one - living by stoic principles until I got much closer to the stoic idea of a sage. This means living virtuously and constantly trying to give to others better. It also meant taking on all the fears that I could responsibly take on until I got to a point where I can say that I honestly never feel fear,
14 replies omitted. Click here to view.
are you jealous>
God, /adv/ never ceases to amaze me what will get a fair amount of replies.
This is bait, please stop roleplaying and go back to /cgl/ you fat ita.
I think it sucks ass to be a woman, no complaints about earning my stripes as a man
No matter what you do as a woman, if you're hot women will never respect you for it; this is my observation from most of the women I've seen.
I could have shit taste in women
Hey op, i didn't read most of what you said but I'll just cover this real quick for you. It's wonderful, amazing and inspiring you were able to make these discoveries and act them out with great success. You've achieved career success, educational success and now you're ready to become successful in a completely new plane of fulfillment. Women tend to only marry and have relationship/kids with men that are equal or higher in success than they are, top successful women very rarely find a man that is at their level of above because it's impossible. Don't be too critical in accepting a partner in terms of career success. And if you want kids be prepared to commit time and love to them.
People like some disparity in their relationships. Most disparity is in favour of the man, for example him being older, taller, heavier, higher standing in a profession. So maybe a woman like you might cause some insecurity, on your own, on your partners, on your or his families side when you get into a relationship.

That said I like "alpha" women and they like me back.

I want to stop worrying about time and death and religion.

Help me be normal again
5 replies omitted. Click here to view.
if you're worrying about the herafter that means you must have faith, no? Don't let your faith go to waste. there is no guidance except with God, so follow Him and leave man's misguided pandering

praised be The Most Merciful
Death is the release from our fallen state. Adam was created perfect and in the image of God and was to rule over all of creation with God. He had the opportunity to be immortal but after he fell and tasted of the fruit, he became mortal and death was the only release from this fallen state. Just think of his genius as gifted by God. But he tasted of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, knowledge he may have gained later had he been patient and realized that evil was there to tempt him. This evil is the Devil or Lucifer. Lucifer translates to 'light'. God created the Angels to help Him create build this universe (the angles didn't 'think' of it, God did, they just followed orders and helped Him build it). Lucifer was his highest angel. But once, Lucifer saw the light in himself and saw it as not God's light, but his own light. He believed he was God. He wanted to create his own Kingdom. In fury God cast's him into oblivion and 'Hell' is what Lucifer chose. He said 'go then, Satan! Have your kingdom'. God did not create Hell. Lucifer did, and those who serve Lucifer do. We choose it. All who are in Hell choose it. Most don't realize they're in it.

Orthodox Christian Monks in Mt. Athos Greece were asked what it was like to fight against the devil. They said they were not fighting against the devil, but rather 'fighting against Christ and fighting to let themselves let Christ take control of their lives'. Very interesting and wise. No one here will take this seriously. Yet I speak the truth. Death is a blessing. Do not worry about it for it will come when you least expect it. Just stay strong in your faith and be patient.
Lucifer is jealous of us. We are destined for more than Angels, much more than Lucifer. And he cannot stand that. Thus he tempts us. He want's us to fall, to achieve less than what God has in store for us. The Angels, through God's grace and wisdom, have unspeakable powers and unspeakable, unbelievable wisdom. And yet, our purpose is higher than there's. An angel has never been Human. They behold the forms of nature since they helped build them through God's grace. And yet, they have never experienced them. We are all destined to be like Adam, and then Christ, the second Adam who fulfilled the prophecy and truly was perfect and without sin. To be perfect. To rule with God in the age's to come. It is not so easy. But this is Orthodoxy.
>God did not create Hell. Lucifer did

Let me expound upon this. Lucifer cannot create anything himself. Only God can. Lucifer can take what God has made and distort and pervert it and 'create' something but this something is not original. This perversion is sin. But what exactly is sin? Sin is a good thing gone about in a bad or incorrect way. Happiness is a good thing but not if you use drugs to be happy or get drunk to be happy. etc. needed clarification. We are not a duelist religion. Satan has no creative power. Only the 'power' (if you can even call it that) to pervert goodness. The same power we all have.

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hey /adv/ sorry to shit up the board but i went to /fit/ and its hard to get through there.

I've been lifting weights and cutting for just over a month now. Pic related is my progress, and i'm 6' tall.

Someone pointed out my pear shaped body and I'm kinda upset about it to be honest. i've always hated my body and even right now I just feel fat and ugly. someone suggested bulking but I'm really poor right now and don't think I could even afford that much food.

So, what do /adv/? Should i continue cutting? Should I make a poor attempt at bulking? Should I kill myself for have shit tier genetics? halp
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.

Looks like your hormones are fucked. Get off carbs and eat more red meat.
Cut for sure until you lose the skinny fat belly

Make sure to do a shit load of abs too trust me and lift as much as you can

Once you feel like you're no longer fat then you slow bulk back up, but never dirty dreamer bulk or else you're back to square 1

GL anon
get on hormones :3
In some ways you look better in your before picture. If I had to see both of these, I'd assume you're not even working out and just started dieting. My advice would be to just work out more and don't change the diet that much.
honestly you look pretty good, anon. obviously you're no adonis but i'd be lying if I said I wouldn't bang.

just some words of encouragement I guess, keep it up.

Ok so there’s this girl that I started dating a month ago. At first I did have feelings for her but they slowly faded away as time went on. I’m leaving for the marines in 2 weeks so it’s not like our relationship is going to last anyway as she is also going to college too. Should I wait until the day I’m leaving to break up with her, or just call it quits now? I’ve had my eye on another girl for a while now but I don’t want to cheat on her. What do?

I was having sex with my girlfriend but then she said that she is tired and she wants to sleep but I continued to fuck her. Is that rape? I feel really bad about myself, and what I did. I don't know how to fix this.
30 replies omitted. Click here to view.
yeah in OP's case it's fine, she didn't say "stop get off me" or whatever she just said that she was sleepy, but a blanket statement like "It's not rape, you were already having sex in the first place." is what's going to land anons in jail one day.
I mean after she said she was sleepy.
>Rape requires an obvious, clear lack of consent
>You can fuck girls who are unconscious and its not rape!
That's clearly rape.
Are you intentionally being a caricature?
Is this some sort of deep feminist false flag op?
Those are mitigating circumstances i.e. someone is under the influence. When sober and of legal age, not saying no absolutely is the same as saying yes? What is this tumblr bs? And I'm a girl btw
dude if you cant "rape" your gf idk wtf ur doing

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Bout to meet a bunch of people that I'll be going to college with. What are some good ways to make a good impression?
Literally just be yourself, minus memes and any kind of fandom shit. Also ask questions rather than monologuing.

>[During introductions]: Hi, I'm Ann Onymous, I'm going to be majoring in [major]. Nice to meet you all.
>[Small talk]: What do you think of campus so far?
>[Small talk]: So what do you guys do in your spare time?
>[Talking about classes]: Have you heard of Professor [name]? I have him/her for [class].

If you're in a group of people where there's like one guy dominating, feel free to break off and talk to other people. I honestly am thinking of the situation you're getting into as being analogous to a cocktail party.
Don't try too hard.
Join coversations but don't take over every conversation and don't talk over people.
Situational humour, if you are witty use it to your advantage.
If there is drinking, never be the drunkest in the room.

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