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How do you guys make social Gains.
I can pretty easily participate in group conversations but I struggle to say funny shit very often. Also struggle with one on one eye contact but I'm working on that and it's pretty easy to get better. What do I say to normies to make them laugh? I've spent my life on the internet so my sense of humour is a bit warped and half the shit everyone laughs at when I'm hanging out with coworkers are old memes or shit that I don't even begin to understand how it's funny
71 replies and 11 images omitted. Click here to view.
This is meant for

I don’t know friend, I haven’t found that one yet, but I’ve got this associate that’s got a similar case as yours in which I can relate better. He got this (his) woman that is periodically pushing his nerves to the brink of actual violence. Tells him through all the quantical ways a woman can come up with what he is shit for, aiming into diminishing his will. The issue is this happens also the other way around; he really is the worst piece of shit I’ve seen someone behave towards a woman. And it’s spectacular. Both ends. It’s a shit-show of how actually we make each other better in many and different ways, through kindness and –combat-, almost symmetrically appropriate to the resilence each one has to grow up through in order to be better and adapt to what each other really wants, has chosen to, and will have to fight through in order to get it. You see, he doesn’t take shit from no one, he knows his’ pretty well and I’m sure he’d think that it is already plenty enough, and for his goals he needs to be like this. He loves it, I’m not sure her but surely all her shit, and her –loving- him with all his shit. Two similar frequencies recognizing and enhancing each other, but most importantly, trying to find themselves amongst the deep shit. They come and go back together between the –seasons-, as if for endurance effect, as a relief from the burdens of being alive, and as a mirror to recognize how much each own has grown through each other. I’m a believer even well oriented –hostility- can extract the better essences of each other, if looking for doing so.

>I remember that love was supposed to be happy… not completely nerve wrecking like this
Happiness is such a –gamely- elusive phenomenon that is easy to fall into imperatives and say that existence in itself is a shithole. Well, if we all are in this shit together, in any form, better start throwing it around and make the game to be the best at it. This actually relates to my ‘s.p.’, if you will my friend; a hard, rugged, long and sour pill. Sadly I’ve come to realize those may be only supplements and may have to ingest them regularly.
>sucking devil’s cock for knowledge
I’ve played myself.
Guys who tell more than one scripted joke are annoying and not funny at all.
brap competitons

How do I ask my dad to change the code on the gun safe.
He gave it to me because he trusted me but I don't trust myself anymore. I get drunk a lot and think about it.
Please help important
Just admit to him you don't trust yourself. It's not a big deal

>that feel when your white gf who is 5’10” has a fucking DONK
Having a big booty (small waist) gf is breddy nice. I know that this is an advice board, but is anyone else doing well here? Any tips on how you got to where you are for other anons who may be struggling?
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
Just hide the thread, sport.
wuuuut tht aint how it works

I appreciate wanting to make peeps feel grate filled in the adv place butt your brought ur white gf into this shit five words in. How that sposed ta make me feel mang? I caint go chasin a black girl just cuz she's black. disrespecful. respec whamen my mang. I'm happy yall trawlin ass gotta trim bred ass in a vacuuum. But in this thread u be treadin up asshat la https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1yPAEe4J8I
No thanks, bud. I only hide disgusting threads, use a picture of something gross next time you decide to attention whore, and I'll hide the thread
Sorry to bring up race. It really isn’t that important. I was really trying to highlight how rare it is for a white girl to have anything to work with.
You got it, chief. Please stop being a total dick in the mean time.
>Sorry to bring up race
its cool, i'm constantly a dick to my coworker. He's black and dumb as fuck so I blame it on lead paint... that black people had to live around because they hadn't been given a chance and pretty much had to live in the lead paint or out in the trees. As a white man, clearly i woulda predicted that shit an lived in the trees. Haha. Jesus christ dude I hope republicans die in a fire.

18 y/o khv here
im by no means an autist, i get invited to and attend plenty of parties, and i could have hooked up with some decent looking chicks. the thing is, i dont want to have my first kiss with some random drunk chick, i want it to be special, with someone i care about. on the other hand, i feel like ive missed out on experiencing hookups and just enjoying myself to the fullest. so, do you think i should wait for someone special, or am i overthinking it?
Just do it with some kid your own age
Trust me
You are never 18 twice
Just fuck another virgin. Slam your limp sausage against another hard hymen
Man, you don't even know how it gets how when you're older

Do the only thing you're worth
First kiss? Yes you're overthinking it.

Honestly, I don't regret losing my virginity to my first girlfriend despite breaking up with her less than a week later. We loved each other at the time, and that was enough. First kiss is so much less meaningful.
You're making too big of a deal out of it. 20 years later, I can't even remember my first kiss. I mean, I know who it was, and where we were, but I don't actually remember anything about the actual kiss. Assigning some arbitrary value or importance to it that only exists in your head is just going to stand in the way of it ever happening.

I'm not saying just go make out with the next drunk girl you meet... at least like the girl. But don't treat it like it's marriage.
Virginity may be the thing to lose with someone special, but first kiss? I got my first kiss when I was 16 with one of classmates on a party and I don't recall it as something special or worth keeping. My current and only gf also kissed plenty guys before me, it is literally nothing.

We lost our virginity to each other and that is the only thing that matters

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>I'm 26, GF is 25
>She's getting worse looking and I'm getting better looking.
>But she treats me so well
>Getting attention from 18 year old girls that I NEVER got before when I was 18.
>Really tempted to break up and try to get an 18-20 year old qt
>Feel like traitorous scum

What do I do?
53 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
she's probably already cheating on you. I am fucking a girl that has a bf who's 26. and she's 25
No one will ever prove it's not a meme because it's just a meme.
>inb4 here's an actor/singer/etc
Beautiful people are still okay looking when they're old, ugly people will be ugly their whole lives. The majority of men are ugly, age doesn't do anything for them, all they have of use to younger girls is money
Who cares? A good wild fuck breaking in her pussy for an hour or two is worth it.
Only a cuck needs *help* from pussy with his life goals. A rational man *may* include pussy as part of his life goals.
Well i guess you have to start cheating

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I've had this fucking knee sprain for 2, almost 3 months now, and although most part of the pain is gone, every few hours I can feel the back part and side of the knee hurt like hell, by the way it's PCL kind of sprain as I fell on it while bent.

Is this permanent? How long does it take to actually heal, that is if it even fully heals? All suggestions are welcome
Go to the doctor nigga
Stop complaining or amputate above the knee.
You gone to physical therapy yet? Guidelines suggest that 12 visits over 8 weeks is the maximum it should take. In at least 75% of cases it should take less, perhaps 1-2 sessions. Beyond that if you still have functional limitations they're probably not going away without some other interventions.

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i have a vagina, and i've been masturbating a lot these days - twice or three times a day, sometimes more. thing is, water in my country is scarce and i can't afford to shower more than once every 3 days. so what can i do to avoid vaginal stench WITHOUT showering?
i heard some people say that bad vagina smells comes from diet. so what should i eat if i want it to go away?
any advice is appreciated!
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It is on the west coast you fucking sopa de macao Brazil favela puta
>el peruANO daring to talk down to anyone, as if he were any different to favela macacos

And you don't need to scrub your arms to take care of a smelly puss
No one can track you down from what country you are in alone. Just say what country
do you live in the salt fields or something?

>the chick I like has been taking to me
>ask how things are
>replies that she has been busy and not been able to talk but our friendship/ relationship is going great
>dose she like me idk should I ask her out
>she says I’m one of her best friends and that I’m rly great
>replies that she has been busy and not been able to talk but our friendship/ relationship is going great
You should've gotten the hint right there.

Move on.
Ok thx
>back to fucking my hand ig


Work exhausts me. I wont be able to retire for a decade or more (currently 28). I want your advice even if you've never had a job, tho.

I've realized that my feelings of restlessness are the culmination of a long list of unmet needs. Some are hard. But I should start with the easy ones. Like getting out of the godamn aparment, for any reason whatsoever.

So I join a meetup site. It all sounds awful. It's nothing new. I know fun. Fun requires me to get a hernia fixed.

Fuck. I've typed this 50 fuckin times. I don't know what I'm asking. here's a godmn beatles song. Next ime some chick asks you abouot the beatles say you like this..

I know all the musics and I'll help u if u want, or help me. Fuck man. I mean just fuck. I don't have to tell you, you have different problems, but still it's just like... fuck.

Screw it.
12 replies omitted. Click here to view.
What's so bad about taking enjoyment from stopping and smelling the roses?
Lol retirement at 38? Poor you.
Entirely fair, but no matter how long it takes, we're pretty much in the same situation. We need money, but we have to do stupid shit to get it. I'm a firm believer that I wouldn't be bitching right now if my work was helping people. I want to quit because I want to help people. And also get laid. In equal proportions. Sounds phoney, but it aint. I've known my share of misery enough to want to help people avoid it.

Nothing. But picture this... i get off of work... tormented by people trying to make me do shit... which doesn't even make sense because it's my nature to get shit done... and then I try driving up into the mountains on saturday.

It's just not enuf time. Even if i try an stretch that shit out with a sherm stick and weed.... or if I stay pure and sober.... it's just not time to live. Working 45 hours a week is just hellish in a way.
I'm suggesting you find time, 15 - 60 minutes a day, to dedicate to savoring life's joys. You don't have to take a big trip to be happy.
If you really can't figure this shit out, you need to get some help. Either get yourself to a therapist or to an AA/NA/CMA meeting and get yourself a sponsor. You are lacking in serenity, friend.
Then slow down. work 40 hours a week.
Move so you live closer to work so it doesn't add several hours to this.
Have people in your life that can plan stuff for you so you just need to accept an invitation.
After a while, you know it is not so hard to do and then you invite people.
If it is an option, go to work earlier.
Simply starting work at 7 instead of 8 or 9 can really open your schedule.

And keep the mindset that there is no time, because it also means there is no time to waste.
Cut out things that doesn't improve your life.
Don't just go home after a long day and watch Netflix, meet up with coworkers, old classmates, or go to your hobbies instead.
Weekly hobby things are really good because there is no planning involved, you just grab your stuff and go.
Once you are there, you have a good time and meet new people.
Use technology efficiently. Eg IM/texting/email is a good tool if it is a conversation about how to meet in person, but it can also be a drain on you.

>Never had a Gf
>Social anxiety, but I've been pushing myself to approach women and date for the past couple of years
>Went on dates with over a dozen women
>Still no Gf, mostly get ghosted or properly rejected if I'm lucky.
>Essentially still a virgin; had sex once, but I couldn't even keep it up or stay in. Girl ghosted me after that.

I don't want to be bitter about it, because nobody likes a resentful neckbeard. I've attached least been strong enough to not let my feelings warp my mind into that of an incel or robot.

But I am very hurt, and I don't know any way around that. I feel undesirable, ineffectual, inferior, undeserving of love and intimacy.

God, sometimes it hurts listening to my friends talk about normal shit like relationships or sex, not being acquainted with these basic experiences. I don't let on that I'm inexperienced, because even if nobody makes fun of me, I know they will look at me with pity or like I'm a weirdo. It's my female friends who talk about sex most often, and I feel like I can't reveal my secret to them without looking like I'm trying to guilt-trip them into pity sex or something.

What do?
11 replies omitted. Click here to view.
A dating life is one thing. Fucking is another thing. Finding love or romance is something else on a different level.

No one loves me, but I don't think that necessarily means I'm incapable of love or that I'm unlovable myself. If there is a right person out there for me I haven't met him yet. (I'm a girl.)
girls are dumb petty humans, just like me, and most other humans.

Fyi, i got laid for the first time after a long period of facing reality head on. Then I reconnected with a friend from high school and we bought a hookah. He eventually ( after two years of loving chastisement) convinced me to make an okcupid. She was like.... super into my dick! who woulda guessed that girls LIKE penises. Then I man whored it up.

Ultimately... uhhhh... the love between a man and a woman is what makes the world go round. Is the economy trying to make the isotopes of uranium profitable? Hell no. It could, but it's cheaper to exploit how much and how easily I fall in love. With like.... idk.... sushi and "froyo" and mudruns. Ha! Stupid women! They wanted me to leave my apartment for childish and "fun" activities! Ha!

Regardless, I'm glad i'm waiting for my soulmate. My chances are 1 in a bazillion. But I read Camus. Maybe she'll be asian. You don't fuckin know. Srsly tho.... wtf am i talking about. I drank a LOT today. And if a hoe anin't gonna do some fear alnd loathing shit wimme wat thu pnt muh neiggr.

Good message. Quite.
i feel like commenting since im going through the same, but by a different path. I have mostly lived with depression for all my life, but incredibly shocking for me, i could let that a little behind when a girl approached to me when i was 19 at uni. First time that happened. Very flattered and enthusiastic, i started dating her for a year and a half and then it went south because i pretty much drowned her on my emotional lack of stability. almost 3 years since the breakup and i still can feel as good as i did in that period of my time, and my solitude these couple years are a constant reminder of how lucky one can be when given these kinds of oportunities. I have been dealing with the fact of putting msyelf out there and feel like a dumb needy ugly fuck at the same time and its not pretty to get ghosted, rejected, not taken seriously or having friends who pretty much dont know what is like to be single for more than a month. Adding to that, i cosntantly have the thought that anything i get wont even be half of everything i had since it was my first and only romantic encounter in my life, first kiss, firsts hands that i hold, first girl i revealed everything about me and the first and only person who truly loved me after knowing how shitty could i get, and all that in a period of my life were i had just lost my dad, my grandmother and my grandfather in 1 year. I know its dumb to think i will get in terms of being alone for the rest of my life, and i know i hate feeling like someone who seeks love in every corner, but i think the key in all this is to go through any way i can become better in what im doing, finding objectives and date all the women i can date without giving up.

>A dating life is one thing. Fucking is another thing. Finding love or romance is something else on a different level.

Yeah, I realize I'm conflating those three things, but to be honest, I'd be happy with any of them. Even if I didn't yet find my soulmate, if I were at least dating and having sex like a normal person, I'd at least know that I'm not totally undesirable and contemptible, and I'd at least be having fun. I mean, most people are in that boat, going through relationships or flings and not finding "the one" yet. That's normal.

Being an adult and NEVER having had a gf, being a virgin, barely getting dates, and barely getting second or third dates in the rare instances where you can secure a first… that's not normal.

It only has to work once to happen so if i ever give up im just stomping on my solitude a little more. I really know i can do it, so can everybody here, maybe some people have a longer run since before getting a girldfriend maybe you lack more basic social interactions, and thats fine, but work on those, feel like shit, get embarrassed, if its nothing illegal just go ahead and fuck it, i promise you thats the way all the interesting shit happens and thats how i always come close to something. I can say it will work but it sure helps A LOT, so please, just go crazy a little now, we have nothing to lose at this point.

I've killed a lot of people, legally that is. My brain is on a loop of me killing them; or me killing other people. I've just gotten back from a bad country; and I have hardly talked to, or been sober the entire time Ive been back. I was a cop who had not seen much of any action before. Any other anons have this problem?
Not in the same situation, but dealing with some serious shit from being in a high alert situation for a long time. I'm sorry that you're dealing with this anon. I'd talk to you if I knew you. Gotta stay focused on the present, good feelings, etc and it'll get easier. Your mind is stuck in a feedback loop right now. It might not feel like it right now but it will go away the less you focus on this stuff and the more positive relaxing input you let yourself get
Sounds like PTSD
Jesus Christ I hope so.. It's been a long time. It just feels like everythings fucked up and will never get right. I've never even talked about this to another person.
I promise it will. It may help to talk to someone in person if you're able but it's not required
I strongly advise you to go to see a mental health professional. That sounds awful.

when confronted by an officer, and you believe you are being detained unlawfully or without cause, what do you do? just let them arrest you?
36 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.
You don't plead the fifth to the cops, that's for court testimony
No...that's not one of the things they're allowed to lie about.
Lol you realize that most lawyers charge a minimum of $250 an hour and you probably didn't make that much that day.
Unfortunately they view criminals as subhuman in the US.
>Record the confrontation for evidence
>know the laws in your state/province
>if charged for something you can beat hire an attorney
>Know that 99.9% of the time they're just doing their job and aren't targeting you
>be prepared to defend yourself and know what line you're not willing to cross as a man (in extreme cases)

Sometimes I feel empathic towards others and want to see people succeed other times I feel narcissistic and want to compete and judge and compare what I have better than others. Most times I feel good towards others but sometimes I go through moods where I judge how skinner and prettier than I am than others. Help me dudes

can i keep a bf with just oral and anal sex? i need to stay a virgin until engaged at least
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No, fuck no, that just screams mental illness, especially if that’s how you interpreted some religious nonsense.

My advice is to tell your bf to fuckin run.
As a guy who appreciates a girl who saves herself for marriage, I think you can definitely make it work. If your boyfriend will only stay with you if he can have vaginal sex with you then he's not worth marrying anyways.
Thats some gay homo catholic shit. God wants every straight man and woman fucking each other's brains out.
You're not truly a virgin if you do anal and oral
If it were me, no.
I would rather wait until marriage if mutual masturbation were off the table too.
Oral does nothing for me, I would rather give than receive. It is one of those things where the thought matters more than the act scenarios for me.

I broke up with my first (and last) gf almost a year ago now. She kept cancelling plans with me, barely replying to my texts, never making an attempt to explore my interests and flat out laughing at me for them, so I blocked her without saying anything. She tried contacting me multiple times after I did it, but I never answered and refused to speak. I felt good at first. I was confident I had made the right choice and was proud of myself, but after about a month or two I fell into a depression after realizing how lonely I was. I tried messaging her again probably about 3 months after dumping her, and she admitted that she still loved me, but ended up going for another guy she was talking to before I appeared because I understandably was not the better choice after all that. She claimed I was "wishywashy" and that I was only pretending to love her because I was unable to replace her, which is probably true. I tried to stay friends, but she started taunting me so once again I stopped talking to her. I'm not sure if I was the bad guy or she was, but either way I find myself unable to stay mad, and I'm still incredibly lonely.

Continuing in thread because "field size too long"
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She had no fucking respect for you, man.
Think about how you could have wasted half your life, only for marriage to end in a horrible divorce.
Now you can find someone who actually cares about you.
I don't want to get back with her. Not at all. I'm just freaking out because it's been a year now like I said and I don't think it's normal nor healthy to still think about someone I haven't even seen in person for a year now
This is true, and the exact mindset I had when I originally dumped her
Sounds like oneitis.
Why do you think about her?
Like what part?
The sex? The romance?
My thoughts mostly consist of scenarios where she sees me now and how I've changed, or if we had stayed together. Of course, she's the only girl I've had sex with so she pops up in my head when I jerk one out too. Nightmares are mostly either ones where we're still together, or ones where she laughs at me. I remember specifically one nightmare where I was a delivery person, and somehow I got stuck in a wind on her street and she came out to taunt me.

Again, I DON'T want to get back with her or even be friends with her, which is why the last time she tried to message me (she used a fake account, so didn't know it was her until she said it) that I blocked her right away. Which is why I'm bothered by these thoughts and so desperate to get over them

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