[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Search] [Home]
Settings Home
/adv/ - Advice

4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
06/20/16New 4chan Banner Contest with a chance to win a 4chan Pass! See the contest page for details.
[Hide] [Show All]

Attention: All work safe boards are soon going to be on the 4channel.org domain.

For now, all boards are accessible through either domain.

Make sure to update your script blockers and whitelist the new domain.

The 4chan Vtuber Competition is over. Click here to see the winning entry!

[Catalog] [Archive]

File: Tinder_screenshot.png (93 KB, 237x421)
93 KB
I'm two years into a fairly great relationship, with a wonderful but so humanly imperfect girl, and you know what I'm daydreaming about right now? If I could break up with her, move put back into a nicer apartment with all my nice furniture, get some multicolored light bulbs and stock a bar, set it up like as an open art studio, and post this on tindr with my most creative and impressive photos
>26 6' 220lb
>$55k+ a year
>come smoke with me and listen to music while I draw, cook, and create shit in and around my apartment
>looking for engaging and creative people, or just lazy and chill girls to hang out and get to know
>chefs, artists, groupies, workaholics, procrastinators welcome
And just not give a fuck, invite people into my cool little life all casual like with with no expectations
It just seems so possible and so fulfilling. Im not about to end my relationship, but this is the type of stuff i was thinking of lately. Not sure what advice is warranted, but I just wanted to share. Im dating the girl I might marry, and yet I'm seeing so many options for how I could spend the remainder of my secual life, even if only for a while. Thoughts?
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
>all that pretentious shit

lol lets be real here you just want to fuck lots of girls
To be honest she doesnt have very much free time right now with her work, and I am frustrated with a lack of variety but thats really just lust I guess
Yes, but this is how I would be able to do it and really make the most of my free time
And do you have the honest conviction that you’d be happier for it?
Idk its just an appealing fantasy about a part of my life I've sacrificed for my relationship. Thinking about options like this makes me feel more free

How do I realistically get a house for myself RIGHT NOW without money? Just by stealing it?
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
1. Get to China.
2. Go to some second-tier city with high rates of housing development
3. Enter literally any high-rise apartment building in the suburbs
4. Move into one of the thousands of empty (never to be used) rooms. If you get kicked out, repeat the process in another town.
>a little extra
A slight under-statement, but ok.
>their services
>hand rubbing intensifies
By services do you mean loaning out money they don't even have?
1. Draw one
2. Buy a Barbie House
3. Ask your parents to transfer ownership to you
You could steal a caravan and live in that

This is not exactly true. Although it depends on your local laws, there are quite a few places with squatting rights - the general thrust being that derelict, unused houses can be claimed by anyone willing to maintain and use the house, and after a period of years (the length depends on the local laws) of no one contesting ownership, the property can be legally declared as the squatters.

I somehow managed to accidentally purchase one credit on audible. So i essentially get to pick one book.

I want something centred around getting your shit together, Motivating me to stop being a lazy fat shit and actually learn how to better myself.

Bonus points for a smooth voice.
The antitode
The Communist Manifesto is really nice

File: FB_IMG_1542575762375.jpg (23 KB, 720x900)
23 KB
Basically I'm 20 years old and I'm feeling bad of seeing all of my friends getting laid while I got nothing. Last girlfriend I had was when I was 15 and since then I haven't been in another relationship, but the thing is that I'm desesperate for someone special. My self-esteem is fucked right now and my grades are dropping because of this. I'm in a point where I'm starting to hate myself.

What should I do? Like I have no idea where to start to fix my fucking life.
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
File: losers and truth.png (286 KB, 680x904)
286 KB
286 KB PNG
How many girls have you asked on date this years?
Mmm... If my memory is right, two girls (I'm OP). Both girls said yes to the date, but I only went out with one of those girls (the other one cancelled our date like two times in a row and I surrendered). That said I approached a girl and she just got freaked out (she seems very shy to start with, but maybe I looked creepy when I approched, who knows). Anyway, should I try my luck more?
Forgot to mention, this was this year
If you want gf or laid? Yes you need to up your dating game. Try one girl per week.
I can't wait to have old nasty roasties all over me for my stable income

File: Train3.jpg (65 KB, 780x439)
65 KB
my life is a trainwreck, im old and I keep repeating the same mistakes
how do I escape this cycle of suffering
File: 1518751195102.png (1.13 MB, 768x1024)
1.13 MB
1.13 MB PNG
lesson is being reapeated until learned

File: BR2049-Wallpaper-Dam.png (2.33 MB, 1920x1080)
2.33 MB
2.33 MB PNG
I am 18 and a virgin though I'm not too fussed about it, however, is it worth me hiring a prostitute/escort to experience it or no?

>Pic unrelated
Grab your balls and do as most guys do - ask many girls out, get rejected by most, and date the few that dont reject you.

a) You will keep money in your pocket
b) You will gain confidence
c) You will have a girl that hasnt been used by at least 100 different men (most escorts at a minimum have fucked this much)
no. It’s definitely not worth it

File: flat,800x800,075,t.jpg (57 KB, 800x800)
57 KB
how do I talk to a girl online that I love?

>checked her kik she deleted it
>checked her Instagram she deleted it
>I know she still has Instagram because I checked from another phone
>dont have any other forms of contact except I know her username she uses for everything

so is the only way basically to make a 2nd Instagram to talk to her? I dont think id go that far and its a little obsessive
u answered your own question. idfk what to suggest also wtf she deleted the platform u talked onto? she ghosted u get over it.

File: fuckthisshit.jpg (39 KB, 620x800)
39 KB
A supervisor and shift leader who have been with my company for 3 months are trying to get me fired from a company I've had no problems with since being hired 2 years ago. Just before they both arrived, I was promoted and called an "excellent" employee. I've been harassed and had my work sabotaged over and over. I could prove it in court, but I'm poor and have a lot going on outside of work. Others have experienced harassment and reported it as well, but they made us sign a contract stating that we waived our rights to class action lawsuits. They also made us sign an arbitration agreement. If I were to sue, I would have to sue alone and face a judge that the company picks. I'd rather just quit immediately and forget about these bastards, which brings me to my question:

Have any of you ever had issues with being hired by other companies after being deemed non-rehireable at a different one?

If I quit immediately and right before the holiday, I'll be marked down as non-rehireable by HR.
I'm sorry anon, in what kind of shithole do you work? Just round up everyone that has been harassed and make a complaint with HR, they will have to listen to your complaints and will act on them by conducting an investigation and reporting this to the boss man because that's part of their job.
The more people that turn up and do this the more likely they'll get fired on the job, especially if you can prove that they've sabotaged work to try and get you all fired and harassed you all in the workplace.
If for some reason your HR doesn't do this then just round everyone up and go talk to their boss.
HR doesn't give two shits about employees, they're only concern is that someone isn't breaking the law, in which case they'll just fire everyone.

Harassing you at work isn't illegal. They can be assholes and try to get you fired if they want. You only have a case of they harassed you based on a protected class like race or religion.

Black listing is a real thing, but if you can find another job before you quit it won't matter. Also if you have someone to count on as a reference and who can explain the toxicity of the environment and your hard work you'll be able to overcome it.

File: 1532555488178.jpg (207 KB, 900x684)
207 KB
207 KB JPG
>dad tortured me
>sister used me as sex toy
>mom would beat and manipulate me all day

can one recover from a broken childhood? how?
2 replies omitted. Click here to view.
You can recover from a broken childhood.
However, you said
>manipulate me
So you are likely a moron and then the answer is no.
Get referred to a psychiatrist.
FUCK psychologists/""therapists"".
Go to an actual doctor.
Just don't get sucked into taking medication unnecessarily
Yah, it's called therapy and getting over it.
You can wallow about your broken childhood or you can move on with your life.
Just don't pretend like it's impossible and that there's no one who has received training to deal with your kind of situation.
>sister used me as sex toy
God I wish that were me
>don't get sucked into taking medication

It's literally psychiatrists' job to diagnose and then assign medication. That's what they are doctors for, to evaluate the need and to prescribe the medication. It's what they do. Psychologists exist for any other type of psych aid, beyond these two functions of diagnosing and medicating.

File: 1515192327596.gif (1.52 MB, 250x186)
1.52 MB
1.52 MB GIF
How does one unironically get a Japanese gf?
File: Rule Two.gif (22 KB, 400x300)
22 KB
The same way as a regular girlfriend, but you'll have to only target people born in Japan like the gaijin scum you are.
azn's are overrated as gf's

File: 1542456890982.jpg (106 KB, 560x510)
106 KB
106 KB JPG
Need help asap anons

Basically my gf woke me up by calling me on her way to work. (Not a neet, she just wakes up earlier than me). And I wasnt really fully awake and barely could hold the conversation as you would expect from someone who just woke up. But then she hit me with that "you never listen to me and you dont act like were a couple do you even give shit about me" talk. And she hung up. What the fuck does she even want like I would understand if it was like that all the time but I just woke up wtf. What am I supposed to do
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
Anon thanks but that was not really what Im asking for
Ask her if this is something that’s been bothering her for a while. Then if she says that it has then tell her that you want to hear if she feels that way, but that she could be nicer over it, because you would like to work on it and you’re not trying to do it. Tell her that you understand that you could do better, and would like to work on it, but sometimes it’s not reasonable to get mad at you for not understanding. Tell her that you’d literally just woken up and that you didn’t think it was fair to get that kind of response when your’e out of it. But mention that you do understand if she thinks this is a problem and that you’d like to work on it.

100% chance she’s felt like this for a long time and you probably do space out on her a lot, even if this instance it was unfair to snap at you and made her seem crazy. A little understanding can go a long way, she needs to understand you and you her, but someone needs to start. Just acknowledge that you’d like to be better and that will make her warm up to you, and trust you when you say you didn’t mean it today though, she’ll realize it was unfair to snap at you for being asleep.
Holy shit you might be right. Thanks anon, appreciate it
This is the point where her dislike for you spirals out of control until one of you breaks up with the other.

I wish you a safe journey through the darkness, friend.
Update: you were right and we talked about it. She was really happy to hear those words from me. Thanks again

File: 2c9e3b7.gif (1.96 MB, 404x397)
1.96 MB
1.96 MB GIF
Is it weird that I have an overwhelming desire to get married? I am 19. I do not want to get married for religious reasons.
8 replies omitted. Click here to view.
You are (most likely) a man, so you are in an ego crisis where either you incorporate pure freedom into your life where you wish to not be bound by anyone's rules or regulations yet the biological insinuation of gene replication also plays a large role. On a side note are you slavic?

No, it's not weird to desire lifelong commitment, companionship, love and a family of your own. I don't think there's anything more normal than that. Just don't make hasty decisions on your way there and you'll be good.
File: Melissa_ed704a_6736852.gif (609 KB, 540x260)
609 KB
609 KB GIF
I agree with you 100 percet OP im the same age dating is a waste of time and fornication leads to sodomy and stds.
Not OP but I also want the marriage and have Slavic heritage.
Don't wanna get married yet, but I do want a stable long term relationship which will lead into marriage.
Am 20.

File: index.png (7 KB, 205x246)
7 KB
How do you come to terms with the fact your parents never loved you?
By disassociating it from what it means to love yourself.
1. Put yourself and your priorities first, always.
2. Get friends to help with No 1.

File: 1464531843967.gif (2.08 MB, 480x270)
2.08 MB
2.08 MB GIF
I have been single for 11 years now. My last relationship was absolute shit, my ex was controlling, jealous, possessive and manipulative. I was an idiot who thought fighting with the one you love was the way relationships go due to my parents hating each other for a long time, and never splitting up. I cheated on my ex and though I never told her about it, I hate myself to this day for it and have quite masterfully internalized the self-loathing to the point where I think it radiates like an aura from me and thus repelling anyone who might ever actually express interest in me.

In the past 11 years, my social circles have lessened until I have dropped to just 1 friend, whom I see once every few months, if even that much. My capacity for empathy and sympathy are almost non-existent. Violent urges have gradually increased to once a week or more and I worry that they'll get even more intense. I think I feel love only occasionally when I get hit with a wave of strong emotions unrelated to love or remember the feeling of loving someone in the past. I know I'm not a complete psychopath yet, but if I keep up with my social isolation and shy away from forming relationships, friendly or romantic, I will most likely just kill someone in public, in a gory fashion, and then hope for suicide by police if possible.

I still have the need to be with someone else intimately, emotionally and physically. I'm not looking for someone to fix my problems, only I can do that. But I am a weak man and once upon a time I indulged my romantic side too much, but it kept me human so I have to go back to being that kind of person again. Alone, I am less that whole.

How am I supposed to function in society and actually get someone interested in me who won't run away at the first sign of me opening up and being vulnerable?
File: stress.jpg (239 KB, 1107x1231)
239 KB
239 KB JPG
11 years and you still didnt finish the coping mechanism?
This is quite a complex question.
I believe that modern society has devolved into what some faggots called metamodernism.
What this means for society is that, according to this principle, we can entertain the romantic idea of just talking to a stranger, getting to know them and falling in love but not actually do it because we perceive the probability of such events happening too unlikely and not worth whatever the risk that our arbitrary loss aversion mechanisms have come up with.
Unfortunately this type of thought has plagued society, and the proliferation of technology has only enabled future generations to be raised in an even more detached manner where the internet can act as a form of escapism; after all, many of us have the world to talk to on their phones but don't do it with actual people standing in front of them on the train or bus. We've all become more and more lonely, yet we don't feel lonely at all.

It has been 11 years, hasn't it? You need to get over all the self-loathing stuff or you'll stay in a downwards spiral for 11 more.
I've done plenty of mistakes in my lifetime too and hurt others, I even came to avoid happiness and hurt even more people by denying it to them. But most of all, I hurt myself.
Yet, I do not regret my actions because that would mean that I'd be forsaking the reasons why I took them to begin with, so instead I try to do better each and every time, hoping that one day I'll find happiness for myself. And that's probably why I've gotten so far.

If you want my advise, I'd say that you have to forgo your insecurities if you want to succeed. The reality is that everyone around you feels the same as you, so you either chase after your own happiness or endlessly hope that it falls on your lap despite doing nothing to deserve it.
And trust me, I've had plenty of happiness fall on my lap and I didn't feel happy at all.

So if you want your own happiness you have to go get it yourself.
There is nothing to cope with, I've long since mourned my lasted relationship and accepted my fair share of the blame in it imploding spectacularly.

Thanks, Asuka, but I'm aware that others can't really can't fix my internal issues, only I can. And I do have some forms of happiness, in the forms of books or games or music that I enjoy. My main issue is that I'm 31 years old and I just don't know how to connect with people. When I was younger, just going up on various forums, anime or books or whatever, and heading to meetups was easy. Now I'd stick out like a sore thumb in the crowd, despite knowing I'm not even the oldest dude that would be there.
There's a lot of things you can do to connect with others. Get a social hobby, practice a sport, do charity work, hangout where all the other 30 year olds hangout (bars, cafes, work), try to start conversations with your neighbors and strangers, try to find a wife through dating.
Life doesn't end just because you're 31 and don't have the social connections that most your age do; you'll just have to remake them.

I might have fallen in love with a female friend of mine.

We're not very close friends but we've know each other for a while and we started talking a lot recently.

The problem is she's quite a bit out of my league. Very unlikely that us being together is going to happen, looking realistically. On the other hand being friends with her is not an option, seeing her with some other guy would fucking hurt.

Gotta cut contact with her one way or another. What's the best way to procceed? It's worth mentioning that we have a decent amount of mutual friends.

Pic unrelated
File: u have to be 18.gif (22 KB, 400x300)
22 KB
Stop being retard, pic related and ask her on date. Flirting, handholding. Do it!
I'm 20, just inexperienced. Only ever had one gf and made out with a girl from tinder once.

What do I do when she rejects me?
File: stress.jpg (239 KB, 1107x1231)
239 KB
239 KB JPG
Then you will do pic related and keep living on afterwards while looking for new girl to get rejected by.

Stop overthinking bullshit.

Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.