[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / vr / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k / s4s / vip / qa] [cm / hm / lgbt / y] [3 / aco / adv / an / asp / bant / biz / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / gd / hc / his / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / news / out / po / pol / qst / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / wsg / wsr / x] [Settings] [Search] [Home]
Board
Settings Home
/adv/ - Advice


Name
Options
Subject
Comment
Verification
4chan Pass users can bypass this verification. [Learn More] [Login]
File
  • Please read the Rules and FAQ before posting.
  • AdBlock users: The default ruleset blocks images on /adv/. You must disable AdBlock to browse /adv/ properly.
  • Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

05/04/17New trial board added: /bant/ - International/Random
10/04/16New board for 4chan Pass users: /vip/ - Very Important Posts
06/20/16New 4chan Banner Contest with a chance to win a 4chan Pass! See the contest page for details.
[Hide] [Show All]


The 4chan Vtuber Competition is over. Click here to see the winning entry!



[Catalog] [Archive]

File: download.jpg (7 KB, 284x177)
7 KB
7 KB JPG
Joining a ski club soon in uni. I don't know anybody in it but I figured it would be a good idea as a freshman because it would help me meet people. How do I not fuck it up. I can kind of masquerade as a normie but my social skills aren't excellent. Any advice appreciated.
>>
>>20165452
go there and talk with people and practice caring about people and what they say
>>
>>20165452
This really depends on what kind of person you are.
But yeah just try to be yourself.
>>
>>20165459
What do you mean by "what kind of person I am", just curious

File: 12567f0.jpg (118 KB, 821x1141)
118 KB
118 KB JPG
Is it weird/risky to ask a qt 3.14 classmate on a date if we're going to spend the next two years together, full-time and in a small class (15 students)?
1 reply omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20164869
Two years of constant awkwardness I guess
>>
>>20164882
You still can be friends.
If she declines act like it it doesn't really change your friendship status.
>>
Yeah it's weird AND risky. so, unless you really like her a lot and you get on really well, and she is like the one in a million , don't do it. and date another person. You'll make your classes really awkward and depressing,

I was in the same position as you, 15 person major, all the same classes. i became good friends with a girl and dated in secret (so as not to make classes awkward). It didn't work out, i dumped her multiple times. but we kept coming back together because we saw each other all the time. Also she was kind of clingy and told me that she'd wait for me.

Now we're done for good. but class was stressful. seeing her made me feel really fucked up and my emotions were all over the place. even though i dumped her. i only had to see her for 6 months after i dumped her. i can't imagine doing it for a year or whatever, if i were you.
>>
>>20164892
>>20164908

Damn you both have a point.
I have to admit it, she's not the one in a million, so I can handle the rejection I guess. Thanks anons, hope you have a good day/night
>>
>>20164852

There's nothing risky or weird about it. Just don't make a big deal of it and neither will she. Don't be pushy or creepy and even if she rejects you it won't be weird.

File: 1533402107386.jpg (327 KB, 902x960)
327 KB
327 KB JPG
I'm so fucking lonely and sad. I think i'm slipping into depression. I hardly have any friends and i don't even talk to them regularly anymore. Everyone walks over me or dislikes me and i don't know what the fuck i'm doing wrong. My closest friend has been distancing himself from me and making his own life and i'm just stagnating here in this room doing nothing.
I don't even know what i'm asking. I'm just hoping someone would just give me a reply to fix my entire life.
2 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20164819
it's even got built in panic buttons to hide/mute all the people that aren't already friended and you can individually block/mute people if specific people are being toxic.

But also be aware people in general are always judging other people in general. It's not fair, but it also isn't specific or targeted. It's just how social animals work and not even necessarily negative.

At any rate, enjoy people watching. Eventually you can upgrade to malls :)
>>
>>20164698
Same here. I'm in therapy and it is the only thing keeping me alive. My therapist is pretty cool and understanding. I don't know if you can get therapy or not but I would consider it if you can.
>>
>>20165331
Yeah i've been considering it for a while. It's just kind of expensive and i have doubts on whether it'd even fix me anyways.
>>
>>20165346
I've only been in it for a couple months so I don't know if it will work long term. I'm just too terrified that if I don't do anything about this now it will be too late before I know it and I'll only have one option.
>>
Have you tried to vocalize how you feel toward your close friend? Take the first initiative and casually mention how you hate how you think the friendship is dwindling and you still want to be apart of his life. As for everyone else, give them a reason not to trample on you, wow them with whatever skills you have. It may be come off as some sort of dirty tactic but if you know their weakness but them in a position where they are bound to fail and you are bound to succeed, then everyone around you will give you some sort of recognition. If you're employed do this especially to a co-worker nobody can't tolerate, you'll end up more favorably in the eyes of others.

File: images[1].jpg (11 KB, 231x218)
11 KB
11 KB JPG
What do you do after work wagecucks?
How old are you?

I’m really sick of being me. I constantly feel as though I’m wasting everyone’s time and I sabotage things before even giving them a chance. I’m so goddamn sick of being me, I’ve lived inside of this sad bubble for the past year or so without being able to get out of my self induced self destructive cycle. I can’t accept anybody else’s affection because I cant find it in myself to believe that I’m worth the exta effort. I have an eating disorder and depression and anxiety and I’m just so sick and tired of letting my self destructive habits ruin all my chances at a normal life. I study online and travel a lot, I spend most of my time having all these new and fun experiences but ultimately when something good happens in my life I have nobody to share it with, call me selfish but I cant stop considering that I should just go jump out the balcony and call it a day. God I make no sense i’m going to go cry now.
4 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20164837
The thing is that I found someone who actually seems to like me for who I am and I keep trying to sabotage it. Because I’m too anxious or insecure and I consciously know that this person could be the thread that you’re talking about but I just cant bring myself to tug at it because honestly? I’m scared, I’m so scared that my hands shake whenever I so much as think about it. My food issue and my anxiety are something I’ve come to accept but they’re getting in the way of me living my own goddamn life.
>>
>>20164922
>found someone
>scared
Nothin to be scared about. Things will go well or they won't. But if they won't, you'll have lost nothing compared to where you are. Basically things can only get better or stay the same, get yourself out of the way and let them get better.
>>
>>20164822
>remind you that you aren't alone in the void
This is really important. Having someone who makes you feel something good is very important.
Sometimes you will meet with people who will make you feel worse. Try to talk less with these people.
>>
>>20164934
Not op but this is solid advice. I'd add that you should also trust the other person to accept who you are and that things will be positive. You need to take the edge off.
>>
>>20164934
Damn, I never thought of it like that before. I guess it’s just that getting my hopes up only to be inevitably met with disappointment feels pretty awful. But I guess things ultimately do stay the same. Thanks for your advice, it was honestly really helpful. If only someone would’ve told this to me 2 years ago, it would’ve spared me a whole lot of heartbreak.

I saw that small dick thread and OP was a whiny bitch. I have a smallish dick (just below average and not girthy) too and want to know some cool sex moves to do to make sure my lady is also pleased.
She knows about my size, we haven't fucked yet. We are going to soon.
Is oral the way to go? Any specific positions that work well?
I know confidence is key but there is nothing cool about leaving your love unsatisfied
>>
Ok, just try to see what I'm getting at and don't do *exactly* what I say:
You don't have to worry about hitting her cervix and if you're not too girthy then you don't have to worry about being to rough. You have free reign to fuck her brains out. Once you two are comfortable (and she's indicated that it's something she'd enjoy) you can hit her with surprise sex and get right down to business without waiting.
Hope this helps. It's an exaggeration, but I think you get the idea.

File: mike kek.png (194 KB, 347x345)
194 KB
194 KB PNG
How do I deal with the fact that I'm getting more and more disagreable at work?
as I'm getting more and more experienced in my compnay I am more and more enjoying to be disagreable and replying harshly in front of coworkers to people when they are doing retarded shit / suggesting retarded shit / clearly doing it wrong / put no effort in what they are doing.
Am I an asshole ? Am I sadistic?
Over the last month I've been more and more stressed by work stuff and stressed by seeing so many projects being slowed down due to poor planning etc, that now I've taken the approach to really calling out bullshit when I see it, but I have no way to tell if by doing this I'm acting right or if I am having a meltdown and becoming an asshole on a power trip. How is it possible to tell?
It seems that most of the points I raise are seen as valid by my coworkers, so at least I'm not always objecting and proposing retarded solutions. But it's also hard to tell if people are considering me an asshole for challenging their ideas

How to know where to draw the line?
>>
You just need to chill out and recognize that not everyone has the knowledge and experience you do. Not everyone is passionate or even cares about work like you are. Sometimes you just have to move companies if it's this bad that no one cares besides you.

You might be right with what you say, but if enough people hate you, it won't be a good time. Morale will be low. And you won't get help when you need it. Also, getting stressed is bad for your health and mind.

Don't 'call out bullshit'. Treat them like you have to teach them and be patient with them. Raise a point, but be polite. Like, "Excuse me, but would X solution work as well?"

If someone keep fucking up despite what you say, and you're in a position to reprimand, then sit them down and reprimand them. If you are the big boss, you can call out more bullshit. But if you are middle or low on the totem pole, chill out.
>>
>>20165150
really sensible

File: 1493890235016.jpg (34 KB, 370x699)
34 KB
34 KB JPG
is it gross to masturbate to your friend?
9 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20165199
Ohhhh yeah there's nothing wrong with that. It's all in your head.

>>20165303
are you lesbian or just confused? Because that's probably a big issue with how youre feeling. NOW if you want to fuck your friend, you can. Women are always hooking up with eachother, I know ton's of chicks who do/did that shit and these are chicks with husbands and shit
>>
>>20165303
Yeah it's kosher. Just don't tell her.
>>
>>20165317
it's just because ive never felt this way about someone who was my friend before

it's not like i planned on her finding out but it feels really depraved and i don't like to think of her being upset if she found out, but at the same time i think about "what if she liked it?"

idk it's weird
>>
>>20165176
Only if you're unattractive.
>>
>>20165176
I feel like yes it is

File: lXSWGjR.png (65 KB, 1092x1037)
65 KB
65 KB PNG
how do I move away from my shitty small town if im on probation? I want to move to the big city and be a famous rapper. I feel like they're gonna try and trap me here cause im not one of them

I am a god being oppressed. this is an outrage
7 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
File: SpongeNotImpressed.jpg (39 KB, 400x303)
39 KB
39 KB JPG
>>20164537
You're not being oppressed, you got two DUI's. Stop posting.
>>
if you had the work ethic to be a famous musician you'd be working on music instead of bitching on a ugandan orienteering forum 24/7
>>
>>20165228
it would be incredibly fucking rare to make it in a small town on top of it already being incredibly fucking rare. I studied producing music day and night for like 18 hours a day

>>20165220
no one else gets punished like this for the same shit. no one else i even see has bad luck like this it just fucking sucks
>>
File: 1513533831414.jpg (42 KB, 807x659)
42 KB
42 KB JPG
>>20165262
>no one else gets put on probation for DUI's
>>
>>20165313
idk from what I saw on the internet most states only do like a small 1 or 2 year probation period or unsupervised probation in my state its a felony and punished harsh as fuck. I definetely have it worse than most the world

A few days ago I tripped on a side walk and landed on my face and knee. It hurt and continues to hurt, but I thought I was going away. But despite icing and gobs of arnica, my faceplant bruise on my forehead went down to my eye. This is my first time on this website and Someone on one advice website said that this place can help.So what can I do to get rid of this black eye? I don’t want to go to the hospital because I’m afraid that they might think I’ve been abused.
3 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20165246
You're really not going to find anything here that you wouldn't be able to find just by using google.

Mostly you're just going to need to give your body time to heal and clear the excess blood. Unless you still have significant pain in the area that you landed on (meaning there may be a break) why would you go to the hospital for a bruise?
>>
>>20165280
I would insult you for missing the point but like why would worry that much if it's not from abuse?
>>
>>20165284
Ok thank you. I’ll just try make up to cover it.
>>
>>20165294
So my family and friends won’t get the wrong idea? Obviously.
>>
>>20165246
>I’m afraid that they might think I’ve been abused.
Why would you be afraid of that ?
Are you being abused ?

File: 1538271812853.jpg (18 KB, 300x300)
18 KB
18 KB JPG
I was allowed to know of a secret

Most of the friends that I thought were my bros

Were actually attracted to me. As gays.

What do.

Thanks.
4 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20164500
it made me think back on all the friends i did make despite being as unsociable and borderline autistic (not actually diagnosed) as i am.

i realized that I might not be as interesting as I thought.

Feels roasty man.
>>
>>20164517
I dunno, befriend some lesbians to be sure.
>>
>>20164555
checked. what would that accomplish?
>>
>>20164566
checked as well. This way you can be sure they don't like you for your looks.
>>
File: OP_is_a_fag.jpg (219 KB, 1636x1616)
219 KB
219 KB JPG
>>20164491

File: rfm6gd874ddz.jpg (27 KB, 600x623)
27 KB
27 KB JPG
For the past few weeks I've been hanging out with this girl from tinder. the first time we hung out we didn't do much, just talked and almost cuddled. The second time we hungout (tuesday of the following week) we cuddled and had sex. It was great and we both had a good time. Besides the sex we get along great and are pretty similar.
Now don't get me wrong, I love sex and all but I noticed she's the one who pushes for it when we hangout. At this point in time we've hung out about 4 times, and each time she's pretty
pushy for engaging in sex. I don't wanna say she ONLY want sex because just before the frist time we fucked she asked me" you aren't just gonna fuck me and leave right?". I said yes, since doing that shit isn't my intention at all. Honestly the whole relationship is confusing me. I thought I'd never find myself saying this but it would honestly make me sad if she really only hung out with me for the sex.
2 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20165170
Well, her main reason for engaging in a relationship via Tinder very well could be primarily for sex. That doesn't mean she doesn't like you or want to spend time with you aside from sex, but sex may be one of her important goals.

Why don't you talk to her about what she's looking for and what she's trying to get out of this?
>>
>>20165234
Honestly she broke up with her bf at the beginning of the semester (late summer) and he's still texting her, she says she's over it but he's definitely not. I brokeup with a girl that I was with for one month about a month ago.

I know we'te friends at the very least, but I'm not sure what else we are. What confused me is the aforementioned question she asked, wondering if I was just going to fuck her and leave.

I would ask her the question straightup but I'm scared. I'm not emotional outwardly at all but I honestly feel super lonely, I literally have no friends. Idk if for he the handholding, cuddling etc is just cute but to me it actually means something. When I don't feel something for someone I don't cuddle, I just leave right after.
>>
>>20165277
>I would ask her the question straightup but I'm scared.

Then don't and keep wondering.
>>
She probably wants a fuck buddy.
Its safer to have a sex friend and less risk for an STD
>>
>>20165312
And like i said Sex friend
>sex
>friend

Be a good friend and give her a dicking every once in a while

File: water.jpg (828 KB, 3000x2119)
828 KB
828 KB JPG
Working and going to college at the same time has proved to be difficult with my lack of time management and general procrastination. Any tips on how to manage my time?
>>
We kinda need your schedule for both.
>>
How much free time do you have?

File: 1539989665518s.jpg (6 KB, 250x236)
6 KB
6 KB JPG
SO I was dating this girl she's great she shares my same interests and when we would facetime we could be in silence and enjoy each other I had recently been busy and haven't been giving her attention and now we "broke up" and are just friends but she still wants everything we had in the relationship. Says she doesn't know what she wants and now I overthink everything from what she says or sends to how long it takes to text her back
>>
>>20165282
Maybe she pulled away because she thought you lost interest and to save herself from embarrassment called it off?
>>
>>20165288
That's the thing anon I rarely leave and when I do it's with a friend and I hate leaving my house

File: 1533413165714.jpg (370 KB, 960x1280)
370 KB
370 KB JPG
Do women like it when they think a male is high value (he goes on dates with other girls)?
Or do they prefer guys who are not currently dating anyone? If so, why do women always prefer men who can pull mad bitches?

I went to the cinema with a friend last week and it kinda slipped out when I was talking with a girl who's interested in me today. She was noticeable mad
6 replies omitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>20164551
This.

Healthy people have fulfilling relationships and are attracted to healthy people who also have fulfilling relationships.
>>
>>20164618
There are things a vast majority of women like and men like and there are things a small majority they like. Like most men want women without tattoos or student loans. There will be different snowflakes for everything and they probably won't be uncommon but on any 'either this or that' question there is a majority. Don't be obtuse.
>>
>>20164486

>fuckbois
>high value

kek'd
>>
In one of the general psychology books they mentioned an experiment, and while I forgot the details of said experiment the conclusion was this.

Women are more attracted to a man who is dating another girl. The reasoning behind this is that they assume the girl is dating him for a reason.

Basically the other girl has done the work, decided the male makes for a good partner and is therefore a "good catch"

Mind you, the girl might not know this, but according to that book that is the reasoning.
>>
>>20164486
Genuinely surprised nobody has mentioned her (delightful) armpit hair.
Girls see guys whom other women are attracted to as atractive, they avoid guys who are virgins/rarely date because they assume there is something wrong with him that other women have noticed.
However also keep in mind you are likely to be more relaxed and confident in a relationship, as you aren't trying to impress anybody and women pick up on that confidence and relaxed nature.




Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10]
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.