>without directly harming myself
starving becomes physically extremely unbearable very, very quickly
i do not feel hunger anymore (poverty) but i certainly feel the effects of it
are you a meditator by chance? i took some meditation class at a no-shit chinese buddha palace whatever it's called and it helped significantly more than getting psych warded ever did

>>34951496
>starving becomes physically extremely unbearable very, very quickly
I used to starve before, but for a slightly different reason, so I know what it feels like for some period of time. It was difficult for the first weeks, but then it gets a lot easier, so I just thought it wouldn't be too bad this way, especially comparing to other methods
>it helped significantly more than getting psych warded ever did
Yes, I tried to meditate, unfortunately it doesn't help me, on the contrary it only irritates me, but thanks

Heal well

>>34951482
This is going to be a very important question. Are you skinny or pretty?

>>34951482
>I can't go to a mental hospital because I've heard how they treat people there, and I don't want to experience pain.
You have heard wrong.

It is possible for someone to be admitted to a mental hospital against their will and have treatment forced on them, but that can only happen if that person poses an imminent threat, either to themselves or to someone else. If you talk to the psychiatrist and you say "I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to take an overdose of paracetamol and give myself liver failure, because I want it to be as painful as possible. I've bought the pills. I've written a note. I'm going to do it tomorrow night." then they will quite likely detain you. But if you say "I have suicidal thoughts sometimes, and I want to stop having them, please can you help me?" then you will not be detained against your will, and any treatment you have will be entirely voluntary: you can refuse anything they offer. So go to your doctor, and say the same thing you said to us:
>I know I don't really want to die, I just want my life to get better
and then maybe you'll get some help.

>>34951551
I'm not sure
Sometimes people tell me I have a pretty face
My BMI is 19.7, so I'm normal, I guess
Why?

>>34951590
Sugar. Daddy.

>>34951589
I heard this from people who were there, specifically in the hospital that is in my city

"The orderlies don't do anything; absolutely all the work they're supposed to do is done by the patients in exchange for cigarettes and food
As for the nurses, many of them behave terribly. They often uses physical force and loses control of themselves
They take you to training and other procedures with your hands tied, leading you like a dog, regardless of whether you're acting up or not"

I'm not sure that something like this can help me and I'm afraid that it can happen to me too
But I'll think about going there anyway, I need more time
Thank you, it made me feel a little better about it

>>34951623
Well, fine, then go to your doctor and be treated as an outpatient. There's no need to be admitted.

>>34951623
Did you not read my message? All your problems would be fixed with this one simple solution. >>34951615 All your problems go back to one fundamental. Poverty. If what you said was true it won't be difficult at all.

>>34951482
All your problems can be solved by a rich man's penis and you know this.

>>34951496
Really? People say that they experience spiritual and elevated states when starving themselves for a long time. You would go out quite blissful if you actually startved yourself to death.
>>34951482
Just because you're suicidal doesn't mean you're likely to attempt it. You will ride it out. People typically chill out as they enter their early or mid 20s. I certainly did.

>>34951697
>Really?
NTA but yes, really. In the early stages when you're in deep ketosis but your body is still basically functioning, it's not too bad. But once your kidneys and liver start to fail, it's simply horrific.

>>34951711
>But once your kidneys and liver start to fail, it's simply horrific
No, it's simply blissful. It feels amazing.

If you live in poverty, how are you affording college?
What are you going for?
There's a lot you aren't telling us.

>>34952623
College doesn't cost much in first world countries

>>34952634
But access to Healthcare is too much? OP is saying she can't afford antidepressants but can afford college and it's expenses?
Something isn't adding up.

>>34952623
>how are you affording college
FAFSA, grants and scholarships exist
>>34952636
>OP is saying she can't afford antidepressants but can afford college and it's expenses?
FAFSA, grants and scholarships exist

College is infinitely more accessible to the average pooranon (and heavily marketed, to a predatory extent), this is literally apples to oranges

>>34951482
Even though you were born in poverty and indeed experienced the hard version of life, just know that things will always be better only if you put in the effort and escape your bubble of thought about suicide, you know what they say about it, "Suicide is the permanent solution to temporary problems"

Every day thank God since everything can get worse and it's his will that they didn't and hopefully won't, since you are in College then work your hardest to achieve an appropriate future and hopefully a scholarship, your financial status shouldn't hinder your education and I am confident that you have talents and you are aware of it, above all things Life without Religion is what made you think like that in the first place.

>>34952647
Medicaid exists. ACA exists. Community clinics exist.

>>34952656
Two of which are for a very specific population which may or may not overlap with being eligible for FAFSA
again, apples to oranges, asking the wrong questions here

>>34952682
A very specific population?
Would that specific population be those in poverty?
I'll answer for you. The answer is yes.
OP is leaving out information and what I'm getting at is that she isn't as much of a victim as she's pretending she is.

>>34952691
for the third time, apples to oranges
this isn't even a relevant point
even if you're on medicare you are still responsible for a. acquiring care b. expensive ass hospital bills. ask me how i know
fafsa eligibility when you're young enough and haven't had a real job yet is entirely based on your FAMILY's income
you're making up a villain to be mad at on 4chan and you don't even know why because you don't know what you're talking about

>>34952704
Medicaid, retard. Not Medicare. These are two completely different things that cover completely different things.
Get you some hooked on phonics nigger. Jesus.

>>34952707
>hurr durr my opponent wrote the wrong three letters while zooted and posting on 4chan like this is a political debate arena where the details matter!
>i'm gonna call him a nigger and ignore everything else he said because again i don't know what i'm talking about
weak bantz, weak arguments, weak weak weak. yawn.

>>34952711
Cope.

>>34952712
coping with being called a nigger on 4chan? been called worse by better

>>34952714
I accept your concession. Next time I recommend reading more carefully if you want to disagree with someone. Maybe you were confused about the differences between these insurance programs. I would recommend using Google to help clarify any issues you may be having. Have a nice day.

>>34952717
>>34952717
none of that has anything to do with the fact that OP can receive FAFSA and not whatever the fuck you're talking about nobody gives a shit about
i really do not care to google anything you say, i'm high, on 4chan, and know more than you about the specifics of being in precarious financial situations that only permit access to some programs, and even if access to them is granted, can still be prohibitively expensive.
have a shitty day and consider killing yourself

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>>34952727
I'm just going to post this to humiliate you. I do not doubt that you're high. Explains a lot actually.
I own you. Get fucked. Lolol

>>34951697
I do agree and I also hope that this is temporary, as I said, I know I don't want to die, but I'm worried that most likely I will never have a basic life even if I survive this, which makes me terribly depressed

>>34951711
Reminding of the consequences and the potential pain really helps me avoid the urge to do it

>>34952623
In my country, if you have good enough grades, you can go for free in some places, so I'm studying for free now

>>34952636
I can get help at a public hospital, it's free, but I have described my concerns about this above

>>34952735
this dumbass doesn't know the difference between can (technically able) and will (will happen in all cases)
also
>AI summary as BTFO
lmfao. i'm gonna hit a blinker now and i'll probably still have more brain cells than you

>>34952652
Thank you for the kind words. I try to do everything so that things don't get worse and I do everything for my future as well. I hope my efforts will pay off someday. Right now, it's a little difficult for me to clearly assess what I need to do and where to go, but I'm really trying to do what I can at the moment

>>34952656
I guess this is something in the US? We don't have any community help here, so I'm confused

>>34952739
Cope. Cope hard.

>>34952741
How can you afford college but not a doctor's appointment?

>>34952747
>>34952738
>In my country, if you have good enough grades, you can go for free in some places, so I'm studying for free now
>I can get help at a public hospital, it's free, but I have described my concerns about this above

>>34952747
I just said it was free >>34952738

>>34952741
Yes Medicaid is a state-run health insurance program. Differs state to state.
I digress. That brown druggie got super pedantic and I had to put them in their place.
Well you're in college so I presume you have a career goal? What are you studying?

>>34952762
You're so retarded. First you're accusing OP of shit, turns out they aren't even in the same country you're worried about, now you're asking unrel questions to OP's issues. Can you kill yourself so OP has a reason not to, that reason being 'i really don't want to do anything that shitbag did'

>>34952769
You're mentally altered. You are not in a good mindset. You cannot keep up with yhe flow of the conversation. You are lost in a drug induced hallucination. You are brown and an addict. Go away.

>>34952769
I'm very grateful for the protection, thank you
But you don't have to respond to provocations and I won't either, it's really not worth it

>>34952781
even OP knows you don't know how to read as you can see here
>>34952755

seriously. gun mouth. bye bye.

op how is the psych/therapy care in your country. can you get some help without committing to a mental hospital

>>34952785
That wasn't me.
Bro keep up with the conversation. OP don't listen to this guy. He's an admitted addict. Why on earth do you want psych advice from an addict who cannot even keep track of who is who?

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>>34952750

>>34952783
fuck you're so right i'm getting ragebaited to shit rn
i'm gonna go enjoy the day. you should too.

>>34952797
You are enraged due to your drug induced psychosis. You cannot properly perceive reality. This whole thing could have been avoided if you let her speak for herself at the beginning and if you didn't try to "ermm well acktually" me about things you were wrong about.
Just go roll another joint or something and leave the advice to functioning members of society? Mk, sweetpea?

>>34952785
>op how is the psych/therapy care in your country. can you get some help without committing to a mental hospital
The only way to get mental health help is to go to the appropriate hospital. In a "regular" hospital there is no psychiatrist or psychologist. Usually, no one here seeks help from a public hospital on their own because they are afraid that they will be put on the record and may lose some of their rights. People mostly end up there by force after attempts, stroke and etc.
So I don't really know how my treatment will be structured there, because most of the patients there are in the most serious condition and I'm afraid to be treated the same way or lose the said rights

>>34952814
If he read the OP he would have known that already that it isn't an option for you. This dude is a drug addict OP disregard him.