cats having a nice pint edish
>>217941968Dez nuts
me in the middle
catberg on a mad one
>>217941968get him served
ate a quiche and some pie for brek
>>217942004the joke is sex
>>217942013I don't get it
Yo yeah light the bifta rorke's gonna rape your little sister
>>217942013something i will never have. fuck my incel life
ja und ver is herr doktor mouse? i vas told he vood be in ze tread
ladsI've decided I'm going to make a game
>>217942020just a dry spell lad
might get out of bed
>>217942040no lad stay in bed we lose our power if we leave
fucking love mustard
>>217942071what sort
Was in the pub last night and it fucking stunk full of dirty bastards farting after their sprouts and turkey
You did forget about that one.
Got up, cereal scranned, tea made, nose and moustache hair trimmed, water heated for a shower. Need to trim my eyebrows, shower, shave, pick out my clothes and shoes, and brush my teeth before I head to the cafe for 1pm.Maximum effort innit
>>217942075love it all except hot english that stuff's fucking rancid and you lot should be ashamed
wouldn’t want to disappoint any woman out there with my skinny penis
>>217942089maybe you could put it in my mouth
>>217942083The day has come! Please keep reporting.
>>217942089can i rub my thick penis against your skinny penis and humiliate you
>didn’t poo from christmas eve until this morning but filled myself with festive food and booze the whole time just did my christmas poo and two massive logs came out followed by a load of liquid aftermath arse is painful now and i feel like one of those 18 year old eastern european slags on legalporno that’s gets a double anal then has her arse pissed into after
fucking minging bastards you lot
>>217942065horrid plapsow
a series of comedic misunderstandings involving a group of young black bank robbers ends with a befuddled rorke standing at a bank vault as the group's totally unprepared safe crackermovie coming this fall
>>217941968Wtf never noticed the second cat in this picture
Hello friends :)
>>217942106Yep, think there may be a nervous poo to let out also. One of those deep spots has appeared overnight on my chin too. Hopefully it doesn't look to bad after my shower and shave etc. Hope the cafe isn't rammed either, need it kind of quiet to get seats and be able to talk comfortably
>>217942087doesn't sound like you love mustard to me lad sorry
>>217942159*reaches through your screen and strangles you to death*
>>217942144Alri lad?
>>217942130I presume the title of the film is also 'Safe Cracker', for the double meaning.
crakkkas be french kissin they labradoodles
Just remembered to clip my nails, what am I like
Still in my bed
>>217942157Thought there would be something related to faeces.
massive chunk of pannetone for breakfast
>>217942131T. Reads /brit/ in braile
I wish /brit/ were slower.
>>217942225ey 'Tone
he actually only quite likes mustard
waiting for the leftover ham to get all slimy in the fridge so i can rub my hands on it and wank after
>get 5-6 hours of sleep>get in an evil chuddy mood>take 2-3 hours nap>be as happy as can bedunno why this is
>>217942087but that's the best mustard
I'm very unc because getting out of bed at this time is now considered horribly late
>>217942261Stop it.
>>217942276it is horribly late half the days gone already
feel like wallace and gromit has lost it's charm and SOVL, a vengeance most fowl goes way too far with hollywood-esque explosions etcI guess thats what happens when netflix gets involved
>>217942262nasty
>>217942111stumbled on a clip recently of this petite incredibly thin eastern euro girl getting pounded up the arse with a giant black dick and the size difference made her basically look like a human fleshlight and it was so grotesque and bizarre I have no idea how anyone can wank to it
>>217942083do you have an actual moustache
>>217942265he doesn't love mustard at all lad
Going to debut a new personality todayLook out for Gareth, he's rude, full of 'tude, in your face, and up in your businessI'll have an opinion poll tonight about how you found the character
>>217942336i'll fucking kill you
shall be ignoring any and all new gimmicks today and for the foreseeable future
>>217942336you might be right, seems he likes mustard though...
that's the park runs done for another year then heh
>>217942286Hello unc
the jews control the flow of poos and (You)s
>>217942342I like it, feels like this is what /brit/ is missing
>>217942342Sounds a bit like poochie
rorke doing his parkrun but only thanking the white marshals
bet this gareth lad loves mustard
Hobos huddled around a campfire in an old oil drum. Something you don't see anymore
>>217942310Vengeance most fowl is tame compared to chicken run 2
>>217942387you ever get a chance to speak to the cute cardio bunnies?
>>217942329I have facial hair like this lad, minus the points on the end of the tache, although I did have them at one time.A shorter stash is easier to manage and also it makes it harder to kiss women, exberg preferred it shorter, so it doesn't get in your mouth.
wanna do my local parkrun but can't be arsed to wake up early, wouldn't make friends there anyway
>>217942432>white marshalsthe eminems
there has never once been a good post written with proper punctuation and capitalisation you will start to constantly notice this once you realise it
Poo.
got the the chaser on, haven't seen me brad yet
>>217942466
>>217942493Get him booked for children’s story book hour.
>>217942452Forgot the pic haha
Setting off for Wetherby racesAs per an anons suggestion yesterday £10 will be going on rock on ronnie at 15:20
>>217942493fucking hell i'd troon out too if i had a knob like that
Christmas is cancelled this year because woke
thinking about all the evil things i do because i'm a selfish alcoholic
y'all got any plans for nye
>>217942546name 5
>>217942493grown arse man acting like that baka
England pre bazball: 0 wins in 15 tests in australiapost bazball: 1 win in 4 tests.checkmate atheists.
>>217942551ye
not really an appropriate outfit to wear to a parent's evening is it
>>217942493gay if you wouldn't have a cheeky suck
normies putting up their decorations in november then ripping them all down the day after boxing day even though there's still 10 days left of christmas
>>217942570how does it feel to have been so thoroughly arsegaped at your own sport
>>217942551Cancelled. Because woke
>>217942555strip naked thereby implicitly flashing female friendskeep trying to put arms around women's shoulders and waists even when they move awayattempt to kiss people who aren't interestedmake friends worry because i disappear/get kicked out in a drunken messuse the n word
Girl on club dancefloor has her feet cooled by a friend pouring Smirnoff Ice over them (2000)
my man says the nigger word
>>217942604the cold of the ice cools the foot
>>217942604Literally couldn't do that these daysBecause of woke
>>217942525Is this a reliable tip?
cor peng spaff
just got up and opened the window but then got cold so closed it again
>>217942619Very
>>217942604the scrandemic
my new years resolution is to lie and steal
>>217942604drank a bokkle of port yesterday amongst other excess so shall be icing the gout later in similar fashion
liverpool play today btw
>>217942619If you consider a random poster on /brit/ picking a horse reliable then yes
an escort I've wanted to see for a while is available on the 30th/31stShould I go for it?
>>217942652Hope they lose
>>217942661yeh
>>217942661should spaff in her just as fireworks go off outside on new years
>>217942652supported liverpool as a kid but as i've got older i've realised by far the biggest amount of cunts who support football support liverpool over any other
The weasel destroys the basilisk by its odour, but dies itself in this struggle of nature against its own self.
>>217942652which part of liverpool are you from
>>217942652georgie lyall had a go on van dijk's bbc when he played for celtic
>>217942065Lisa Nandy looks like THAT?!
>can we kiss when the b-bells go off?yeah if your payment clears
>>217942695Chester
>>217942695west derby
>>217942020neither do i, sex i mean, i don't get sex...
>>217942652liverpoo
>>217942695liver on the pool la
trying to decide between buying a Volvo V40 or an Audi A3 as my next carthoughts? it would be an automatic & petrol
every single gen z male on the planet has wanked to toy chica from five nights at freddys
>automaticmy pussy dried up
>>217942695frog island
lots of liverpool fans round my ends (northern ireland) and they will all tell you they're not plastics because uh well sure the famine or smth
captchacucks seething at passchads
>>217942741volvo for sure audi is a rubbish brand
>>217942741prefer ferraris me
>>217942758I can drive a manual, just sick of hitting the clutch every 2 seconds in traffic
>>217942763proxy larping paedophile going out of his way to pay for a free website
Scratched my arsehole and sniffed my fingers
>>217942758as if women care about the configuration of your transmission hahaha freakit's like telling them how much you bench and expecting them to react sexualy
reckon you could get a shag in the US just from knowing how to operate a manual gearbox
>>217942767volvos are just fords audis are just vws
>>217942767yeah I am leaning towards the Volvobit more refined than an Audi
>>217942758Everyone I know who has moved to automatic says they'll never go back. Not me though. I will run the shitbox until the wheels fall off
>>217942774don't let them bully you, son
>>217942783it's all just glass and steel and plastic when you get down to itatoms
>>217942791what car do you have?
>>217942778always do thisusually smells alright desu
Then Leonardo noted of the weasel, "this beast finding the lair of the basilisk kills it with the smell of its urine, and this smell, indeed, often kills the weasel itself."
oxidising an illegal molecule
>>217942802true mate, true
>it would be an automaticBender
vulva is where I came out into the world and appeared at first
34 year old unc driving his manual shitbox from 1983 thinks he'll "shag" american women because of it lool
got the Neon Genesis Evangelion on
the book brother bought me for christmas has been put on the shelf never to be read and i assume he is doing the same with the book i bought him
>>2179428112009 Renault Clio 3
im a women and I only shag manual drivers
>>217942853Clios are nice imo
was posting on /hm/ and I got the word someone in here is buying an automatic, poof
>>217942841neek>>217942840mong
sniffed my arsegers and scratched my finhole
shoving my electric toothbrush up my battyhole
homer maggy bart
my leggies going crazies have to put some druggies in my tummies ha ha ha
>>217942874get them shagged
>im a women
>>217942874Moe
ich bin ein femboi
Not met an anime fan i couldn't batter in a fistfight
the dekinkification of manyvids is one of the tragedies of our age
>>217942741what ages roughly because it will make a big differenceget an s3 or a golf gti maybe
ha ha a women ha ha ha
siri, play child porn
>>217942895milhouse
NEW: Party leaders’ Boxing Day traditions via PoliticoKeir Starmer: “We keep it simple. Family time, a long walk - if we can get the kids out … I’ll likely be polishing off the Brussels sprouts (cooked in lemon, oil, garlic salt and a bit of Parmesan of course)”Kemi Badenoch: “Long country walk that ends in a pub” Zack Polanski: “Boxing Day for me is blissfully simple - a long walk to clear my head, far too much leftover chocolate, and collapsing in front of Gogglebox. After a year of relentless politics, there’s something grounding about sitting with my boyfriend and just watching TV”
>>217942936so they all enjoy a nice quiet walk in a 99%+ white village
richard milhouse nixon
>>217942912from around 2012-2015>s3 or a golf gtiThere's no point in me getting a boy racer model like that
why are you allowing a 76 year old man to mog you?
>>217942936they're just like me if I were a gay jewish nigger
me can't believe it not custard
george wiggum bush
>>217942936more like kemi badenoch: "do the bongo bongo dance and human sacrifices and eat heads on sticks then eat bananas under a tree until sunset"
>>217942936Something immensely telling about Paulden, the thrusting young radical, proudly sitting slack-jawed in front of the Idiot Box
>>217942922Kearney
>>217942974I choo-choo-choose war.
>>217942961Wenger has always had very low body fat
john flanders kennedy
me cyan belev it na coostad mon
fucking love custard
>>217942998right and now back to the question at hand: why is a 76 year old man mogging you?why do you look worse than a 76 year old man?
george homer wiggum bush
right its about fucking time to get an irish passport
Bitches love my car.
>>217943019he could genuinely fuck me up
“Pain in ma legs”Get a fucking grip man
>>217942961do you reckon he can still get his knobule hard to have a french wank?
I don't driveSimply can't be arsedI don't give two hoots about cars me
>>217943019I don't, just saying Wenger is in the top 1% of fitness for guys his age
Christmas is fucking over isn't it. Not even boxing day. The whole thing just DONE. I want to fucking DIIIIEEEEE
>>217943054things can go wrong on a mountain quickbetter to call for help and go home safe than die up there
>>217942959GTIs aren't that fast desu but golfs are worth looking at anyway if you like the A3. it's the same car underneath pretty muchA3s had a facelift around 2016 so worth looking at those and whether you care about what's newthere's so many hatchback options. mazda 3s is another one
cause of death: a surfeit of blackness
>>217943066not back at work til friday me
What did you actually get for Christmas though?
Mums just showed me my old college id card from 2013. The de-twinkification has been brutal
which car is more paki? bwm, benz or audi
>>217943076I prefer an A3 to a Golf, had a Polo before and it'd be similar
>>217943085parents gave me a grand and an air fryer
>>217943047I’m entitled to one but they won’t give me one because I don’t have an original copy of my grandads birth and death certificate. I told the bloke I haven’t spoken with that side of my family in forever and I have no way to get an original he said it’s not his problem
fucking car patter of all thingsalmost as bad as chatting about investing or phimosis
>>217943061>top 1%higher than that even I reckon. I don't recall ever seeing a 76 year old man who looked like that
>>217942940Phwooooaarr
>>217943105this lad frying air
>parents gave me a grand and an air fryer
>>217942741Didn’t I already tell you that a3 is good and you should get it
building brown bricks in minecrap
>>217943109well yeah why would it be his problemyou could just be any old rando who claims to have an irish grandparent
>>217943093I try to avoid going too far back in my phone camera reel.
>>217943100the A3 is going to be similar too, loads of the buttons will be identicalSeat Leons another option for youjust go and drive some and you'll find what you like
would still give shirley ballas one
>>217943085bockle of whisky, bockle of gin, dinosaur socks and about £300
>>217943085I would tell you the brands but they're so exclusive I'm genuinely not allowed to mention them or I breach the contract you have to sign when buying them. There are levels of wealth in this world that not even millionaires are allowed to buy.But anyway, let's just say I got a watch worth about £28,000,000. My dad gifted me a property portfolio worth around £280,000,000 and my mum gifted me a sweater made from an illegal material that I'm not allowed to say.
chianti with my pasta today
>a3deano>golf GTI'sheed>pologranddad
in season 40 theyre making bart an incel
mumberg was born in belfast do u reckon i could get an irish passport? will be really useful when i go on my lads holiday to megaluf (or shagaluf as we call it haha)
right well that's me sent into the stratosphere
>>217943134Well no I can prove my link to my dad from my birth certificate then I can prove my dads link to his dad from his. They are just being fucking tight after brexit but they hand out passports to Africans willy nilly
>>217942588How can we practice when it rains all the time
>>217943170rorke earning 30k be like: no no no we can't tax him 1%
>>217943202Why do you want one?
might play some summertime saga (incest mod of course)
>>217943146don't mind having to endure Strictly when over at the parentals since all the women dancers are absolute worldiesimagine how insane the ride must be. I forgive every male z-lister who steps out on his wife to shag his dance partner
A3 is fucking fast as shit if you put in sport mode and dynamic and if you’re going down hill at the same time it’s like a rocket
>>217942588nobody cares about cricket here except boomers and jeets
For me it's a humble Dacia Duster. Fantastic little cars.
>>217942570wasn't really a test match at the mcg was it
>>217943225be dead useful that for when you're needing to get down the hill fast
>>217943220EU passport and also it’s kind of cool to have 2 passports like I’m James Bond or something
check out me sick wheels bruv theyre sick inni
>>217943225yeah that's well sick that bro... hold on lad>pint of moretti please lovelove these foreign beers me lad haha
>>217943251youll be a real life pierce brosnan
We must retvrn to God
rorke thinks he's james bond omds
>>217943248Nah it’s fast on flat too. Basically beats any normal car
>>217943239imagine driving a car named after a cleaning item
fuck it tranny gf 2026 who's with me
>>217943288i don't deserve a gf let alone a trans goddess
>>217943251It is pretty nice being a dual citizen. I need to travel more thoughever.
>>217943274white women be like
>>217943279>>217943225S3s are fast, A3s are not really
mumberg renewed my 4chan pass for christmas get in
>>217943300can't fly though can they
>>217943294I'll take either (or both haha)
Ooohhh look at me this car goes X fast and this car goes Y fast>Has to drive 30mph like the rest of us
>>217943288Nah my dick isn’t big enough for vaginas which have millions of sensitivity things for pleasure how the fuck would it be big enough for an arsehole which has no sensitivity things for pleasure
>>217943274Cocaine niggas be like
Nottingham Forest XI: John Victor; Savona, Milenkovic, Murillo, Williams; Dominguez, Anderson; Hutchinson, Gibbs-White, Hudson-Odoi; Igor Jesus. Man City XI: Donnarumma; Nunes, Dias, Gvardiol, O'Reilly; Nico, Bernardo, Reijnders; Foden, Cherki; Haaland.
>>217943288i could never do this
>>217943299you prefer black men
>>217942961he's on trt
Black women are goddesses
>>217943321boooooring nobody cares everybodys watching plasier vs the polish eagle
the final mince pie
>>217943316You would cry if you saw the speeds I did from Enfield to rugby a month ago
>>217943331just ask rorke
>>217943311into a ditch
>>217943327i prefer elves
>>217943274white women at 18 and 25 KEK
>>217943321who do you reckon has the biggest knob
>>217943338is rugby named after rugby or is it the other way round
Get the tyres steeredhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6bf7Gtrtus
>>217943300Yeah but s3 isn’t a normal car though A3 isA3 is rapid for a normal car
>>217943348name NOW
get the sneed snog sniggered the niggedy nig niger
>>217943363nah
>>217943329I honestly do not believe he is.
Second season of The Night Manager next year|< | /\/ ()
>>217943357it's just a coincidence they're the same word
>>217943321cant watch footy after last nightbig nick letting us doon again
>>217943385reckon eddie meme is done
fingering my knob and pissing everywhere as if i was squirting
>>217943348Ava class abnormality
>>217943357The sport was invented in rugby so they called it rugby
>>217943379lol
3-0 to the sellik this afternoon
>>217943377Come race me then faggot I live near Runcorn we can go on the dual carriage way show u how rapid it is
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk0rAXpt3AMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk0rAXpt3AMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk0rAXpt3AMso this happened
>>217943371Think her name was Alice Innings or it might have been Amira Ingrid or it might have been Anya Ipswich
20 year old bmw 3, 6 owners, 500 quid. seems like a deal desu
>>217943396
>>217943363I don't know what counts as a normal car but the slowest new one is 10 seconds 0-60 and the quickest is 8, so maybe quicker than some but not really fast. If you put an S badge on it might go quicker
Alright, let me get the fuck outta here
>>217943441I'm afraid we can't let you.
scottish football is so bad that some of the teams badges in their top league dont even show up on google lmao
alright lads i havent had a wank in weekshit me with your best content
got my gay willy out
>>217943439Mine does it in 6 so thags a lieAnd it goes from 90-120 in like 2 seconds
using the power of AI to re-imagine my cat as a sexy women with big tits
>>217943419Some Jap shit that no-one gives a fuck about is it
>>217943465
had to play rugby at my posh tarq school back in the day but hated it because I was (and remain) a skinny neek beanpolewas eventually sorted into the "D team" with the other mongs and we'd just stand about in the cold for 2 hours until it was time to go. The D-team also did not play inter-school matches on weekends, unlike the A, B and C teams.
>>217943475try re-imagining yourself as a person with a clue
>>217943499bolg on
>>217943506>>217943506>>217943506>>217943506
>>217943471you must have painted a stripe on it or something
>>217943500dont want to
>>217943466*bends over and presents my PHA*
>>217943505the bolg is indeed growing
>>217943419For me it's https://www.youtube.com/live/65WVhRSv92k
>>217942081Torygraph doing Torygraph things
>>217943054Leftypol saying "hello" to these ladsRorke quietly seething after seeing these lads, then writing an angry X post about it later
