They're stronger than you, faster than you, often they are also smarter than you. Submitting to the seems like the best way to keep your limbs, but there's the caveat of being unable to leave their sights.Some yanhus might also drive you insane or drug you to keep your love. So what can you really do?
be a faithful and devoted husband
>>46653482I can unnerve them by loving them back with the same intensity.
>>46653482Shoot them in the fucking face with a Colt 45, ain’t gonna be that smart with their eyes hanging from a tendon idiot
>>46653482Id kill myself and let them a letter specifically stating that its their fault that I did it, only to make her suffer.
>>46653482Be excessively clingy and needy
>>46653482As you can probably see, this board is filled with equally unhinged men. Yandere behavior is not a negative to them because they are capable of much worse.
Describe Yanhus
>>46653482cum
Haha, yeah, imagine being loved intensively.Or at all...
same thing I do with Analbanians. Tackle to the ground, light on fire, run away. Hand to hand combat is mostly futile.
>>46654308Hey man the Albanians don't deserve that
>>46653482Isn't Alice supposed to be one of the more friendly and reasonable 2hus?Her becoming a Yandere seems rather unlikely
>>46654476You have no idea what Arisu acts like
>>46654476Yes, but she's also socially awkward and a bit of a looser, so it makes sense
Smarter than me? Unlikely.I could think of lots of things to do against them. Not killing them would be preferable.
>>46653482>loving alicegood times
>>46653596Congrats on your new Jiang Shi body, anon. May you have a long and happy (un)life with your wife.
>>46653482If a girl was interested in me, I'd instantly accept her regardless of how many mental issues she has.In fact, her being this crazy about me is a positive
>>46655190>If a girl was interested in meUnironically unreal experience, I understand.
>>46654476Love makes psychos of even the most rational people.
>>46655163what is fug
>>46654476Forest Parsee canonically is a weird autist who hammers nails into straw dolls. You're never safe around such a woman, anon.
>>46657906Don't forget the butterfly pills. Or talking to her dolls like they're alive.
>>46657906I want to cover myself in mud and silently watch Alice hammer straw dolls to trees from the shadows!
>>46657906Nonsense, Anon. A "weird autist" would most likely just be a perfect match for the majority of /jp/sies to begin with. Many a man on this board already plays with dolls, be they small plastic statuettes, fabric ones or even larger ones made out of TPE or silicone. She seems very reasonable and nice despite supposedly being a "weird autist". Of course her being a powerful mage would bring a certain level of power imbalance to the relationship. But surely it wouldn't matter, you'd be a loving, caring husband and she'd never had to resort to using force on you.
Post autistic alice moments
>>46657959mods keep refusing to to their job and rangeban alice for good.
>>46653482Make a more powerful 'hu to fall in love with you anon...Simple as.
>>46657998You're being absurd, Anon. Alice couldn't post here, because there is no internet in Gensokyo. Sure, I have some dolls, as do many other men here. I may even talk to them, but that doesn't mean I'm Alice. Alice is in Gensokyo, waiting for a good husband, yes?
>>46653528Brother, what you need here is this 1911 in .45 Automatic Colt Pistol, this here is much stronger than the .45 Colt (God bless Samuel Colt) but the .45 ACP (God bless John Moses Browning) won two world wars and two lunar wars!!------------------------------Lt. Oswald T. HarrisonAir Force JAG Corp. 2003-2006Springfield 19111998 Corvette2007 Honda CRV (the wife's)I carry a .45 because they don't make a .46I fear no man, but the wife is another storyTHESE COLORS DON'T RUN - 9/11 NEVER FORGETPosted from my iPhone 5
I heard Alice steals fairies' souls and puts them in her dolls.
>>46653482Convince her that if she really loves me, she has to give me all her money and bury herself 6 feet underground for 2000 years
>>46658259wtf I love Alice now
Hus who would be into torturing fairies with you?
>>46657839Thank you anon.
>>46657959Alice is very pretty.
>>46657973cute
>>46658259Where do all these horrible rumors about Alice come from?? Of course she doesn't need to do things like that! A magician as accomplished as her can of course tap into the life force that surrounds all of us and give something like life to her dolls on her own. It's almost motherly when you think about it. Wouldn't you want a motherly wife, Anon? >>46658514Yes, she is very pretty indeed, among other things.
>>46658495Sexually or nah?
There's a reason why yanderes are ALWAYS paired with an insufferable faggot MC, just don't be one
>>46658495I want to violently rape fairies with Alice!>>46658541Dumb protagonists.There's nothing wrong with having fun by yourself every once in a while.
>>46658619Yanderes are usually depicted as demented, average women. Thus, even the weakest guy could kick their ass. What about 2hus, though? Most of them are superpowered creatures.
>>46658614Doesn't have to be but it can be if that's what the Hu wants.
>>46658657>I want to violently rape fairies with Alice!this but Alice with fairies
>>46658054>good husbandWhat would Alice consider a good husband?
Spirit hunter:NG has a good of example of a monster like that going yandere. This spirit named princess Kaguya curses the MC to die unless he plays with her, kidnaps his little sister to learn more about him, then takes over her body in an attempt to live with him in disguise, puts his mom and best friend in a coma, drags him into a mirror dimension where only her and him exists and succeeds in trapping him there if you are retarded and gets the bad ending. Oh and she forces him to fight against other evil spirits because she likes watching him struggle.Its a great VN.
>>46658780Who cares about meme 4th wall monsters what about little sister endings?
>>46658780Dame 'Guya has some twisted hobbies
>>46658815She go live with her mother since the MC likes to live alone. The only special ending with her is one where the MC goes insane after you letting his friends die, he goes bersek and kill her and the mother, then gets put down by the MC of the first game.
>>46658886>>46658886disappointment but thank you anyway
>>46653482>often they are also smarter than youLol, no. Every youkai has the wisdom of a dumb child. Literally get outsmarted by random peasants all the time.
>>46653482>So what can you really do?Ask Reimu to beat the crap out of them.Also because strong enough so that you can defeand yourself. That should be the most important priority if you ever find yourself in Gensokyo
>>46659409>Ask Reimu to beat the crap out of them.You wouldn't even need to ask her.
>>46659461You truly can't trust anyone with your safety but yourself in Gensokyo
>>46657973that's redundant
>>46659549Isn't that something people do when they hate someone and want to curse them?Who does Alice hate?
>>46659549I'm absolutely certain that Reimu's comment on Parsee in the SA Cross Review was her mistaking Alice for Parsee, meaning Alice was STILL at it with the fucking straw effigies years later
>>46659599She did that behind Hakurei Shrine so probably Reimu
It's been a while since Hina's had visitors...Ever since the growth of the Youkai Mountain's residents, hardly anyone makes their way to her. Everyone just gets snatched up by Nemuno and sent back to the village, or the wandering Yamawaros and Kappas outside of the Genbu Ravine are usually more willing to take the first step towards a wandering human.It would stay that way for years, until a certain Anon broke that decade long streak of loneliness... He was an odd one for sure. The reason he had been wandering around here? Oh, about the same as every other lost human: They got bored of the life at the village, came to seek treasures beyond their imagination, and kind of wanted to become the talk of the town. But where the usual human adventurer was kind of loathsome and full of themselves... Anon seemed to not follow that trope. This strange bland of candid naivete and hopefulness amidst a dangerous environment was quite sympathetic. All the more unusual was the fact that Anon approached Hina without a care in the world. Did he not know? Hina's rare contact with the outside had kept her certain that every elementary school at the human village taught the myth of the spinning lady in red and green that would curse whoever interacted with her, dooming them to a life of horrible misfortune.Hina had remained lost in thought for quite a bit as Anon kept complimenting the scenery, the mushrooms, and even Hina herself for being such a nice lady. By now, Anon had already doomed himself if he were to return to the village, if he even made it in the first place. Whether it be a painful shirokodama removal, being shot from a danmaku battle going on nearby, or being someone else's prey in general, there was no way Anon was making it out of Youkai Mountain alive at this point, but Hina had been too slow, too careless, too... enamored? I mean, with Anon's foolishness being on par with an outsider and somehow managing to make it out of the village's strict curfew and security, it must mean they haven't had the time to develop proper relations with anyone, right? It's not just selfishness on Hina's side, no, no. She's just intending on making Anon's life, who had just swung by the dark side of fate, just a little better. I'm sure he could use a nice woman to be together with, perhaps teach him a thing or two about women, not that he'll need to see more of them... Anon's doomed anyway, that's right... he might as well belong to Hina...And it was with renewed, uncharacteristic will that Hina grabbed Anon's hand amidst his monologue about life at Gensokyo."It's not safe around here, I can sense a great amount of misfortune within you. I don't care if you've made it in one piece thus far, I can sense a terrible fate falling upon you whether you proceed further or attempt to return to the village. Please, at least for the time being, come with me"With just enough sterness to convince a rather timid Anon, the two of them would make their way to Hina's home...
>>46659634Imagine being Parsee and having to live with the fact that you're literally just Cave Alice and will never be as good of a hater as she is.
>>46659634I never thought of it that way, it really makes sense that she mistaken Alice with Parsee. Because I saw that Parsee can't leave the bridge, now I don't remember if that's canon or not
>>46659690What a lovely little story. I'm so happy Hina and Anon found each other! I'm sure Hina didn't even do anything wrong, anyone deciding to go to Youkai Mountain nilly-willy like that is doomed to begin with.
>>46659634oh, that was what reimu meant...don't worry, cave alice! protecting your bridge makes you better than original alice!
>>46653482submitting to the nani?
>>46659634What's with Alice's hate boner for Reimu?She was super antagonistic towards her in PCB as well
>>46662670still seething about Mystic Square
>>46662670I'm curious, when have they interacted other than MS, PCB and the nailing dolls thing?
>>46662892They interacted in 7.5 and 8 as well.Other then that and the ones you mentioned, I can't think of another.
>>46663039Why is Alice such a bitch to Reimu?Reimu is never especially mean to her, in her ending to IN she even invites her to the shrine.
>>46662670Zun said that he paired alice and marisa in IN because the canon ending of MS was reimu's scenario, where she defeats alice twice
>>46653482I wish Meiling was yandere for me
>>46653482The only way to defeat a yandere is to react in the exact opposite way that they expect.
>>46664484I wonder if a yandere would be put off by someone returning her affection. I have a feeling it's more about the hunt than actually gaining a relationship for them.
>>46664835Nah, "the hunt" is a guy thing. Obsessively possessive women have extremely low self-esteem. They like having their affection returned. The problem is, because of their low self-esteem, possessiveness and jealousy they tend to doubt the sincerity of your affection, will be constantly mortified of you dumping them and interpret things in ways to support their fears. They also tend to try to adapt to their partner's various demands and preferences, which sounds great, but it also leads to constant tension between what they actually want and what they make themselves do in some perceived need to appease their partner so they don't skedadle. This can get really toxic if they, like many other women, suffer from being unable to express their own needs. "Yandere" is of course a construct with few direct real life examples, but there does exist a rare, honest to god knife murder subtype of these women. Usually they have all the above plus extremely low impulse control and some type of hormonal imbalance.
>>46664835It varies depending on the yandere's personality. The "crazy killer" troupe is just the most generic example of a yandere available. The concept itself can be narrowed down to "person with an unhealthy romantic obsession", not necessarily an insane murderer. A yandere Kaguya or Miko, for example, would probably attempt to make you fall head over heels for them first. A particularly desperate and passive yandere could just stalk from a distance or beg for attention. Of course, someone like Yuugi could always just drag you along like a caveman.
>>46664948>The problem is, because of their low self-esteem, possessiveness and jealousy they tend to doubt the sincerity of your affection, will be constantly mortified of you dumping them and interpret things in ways to support their fears.You worded it extremely well. Both my mom and my ex acted this way towards me.
>>46654476She hides her true self from the public.
>>46665086Are you okay?
>>46664948If there are no stabbings involved, that sounds great.>They like having their affection returned>low self-esteem, possessiveness and jealousyAll positives.A girl that truly loves me more than anything and won't ditch me for someone else is all I want in a girl.
>>46665436You sound insecure yourself. God bless your marriage to Hata-tan, I can't wait for the fireworks.
>>46665086It was obviously written from experience. >>46665436>A girl that truly loves me more than anything and won't ditch me for someone else is all I want in a girl.I understand wanting those things. I also totally understand the appeal of these types. I've romanticized that type of behavior in the past myself too. But that trio of low self-esteem, possessiveness and jealousy only makes for a semblance of actual commitment. The worst case scenario is she is into you only because she thinks you are essentially too pathetic to ditch her for anyone else, and as soon as you grow out of that as a person shit hits the fan. Or she grows out of her insecurity and just yeets out of the relationship. There is no perfect relationship, and life with the more saner cases can work. Maybe they can even be rehabilitated to some degree, but the constant doubt about the reality of your love is really exhausting. You don't really want someone who doesn't belive that you really love them, now do you? The jealousness and possessiviness can also become completely absurd. Every single thing you want to do gets interpeted through the lens of "he doesn't really love me, he wants to ditch me". It's so easy to romanticize some kind of total love that leaves no place for you, but reality is, people really need some space for themselves. And at worst, these types won't let you have it. Had a really shitty day and need to unwind by yourself? She thinks you want to ditch her and, no, you can't covince her otherwise.Do you want to reconnect with old friends? She thinks you want to ditch her.Do you want to take up a new hobby that doesn't involve her, maybe start going to the gym? She thinks you want to ditch her, you are obviously working out to attract more women. Your parent dies and you want the basic need of grieving in peace? Can you guess the pattern already? And even then...yes, there is something really romantic about it all and there is certainly a lot of passion to it, but anon, you deserve better. You deserve someone who loves you and wants to commit to your from a place of security and confidence. And if you feel like you can never have something like that, you deserve the opportunity to become a man who can feel like they are worthy of such.
>>46665543This anon knows what he's talking about, a relationship with this kind of woman is a timebomb. If you're going in, then you better be ready to help her through it. The thing about insecurity, is that it first tells you that you suck, and only then seeks the reason. Cause and effect are reversed. If there is no obvious cause, the person will go through literally insane lengths to find a cause they can accept. You cannot win, you can only buy time, unless you're playing for keeps, and help her through her issues.Anything else not only can fail, but inevitably will. It's like letting an untreated wound fester just because you don't think it's important enough to see a doctor over. Eventually, it gets infected, gets necrosis, and before you know it, you're gonna have to chop off your arm.
>>46659690kyuto
>>46665374A little bit Freudian, but I'm pretty mentally normal otherwise.
>>46665086did they calm down after sex at least
>>46665496I'm just not compatible with normal girls.
>>46653482Her
The hidden technique to handling low self esteem is to make them think you are dependant on them in some way
>>46662715Imagine losing to someone, still being angry about it and them having no recollection of beating you up the first time
>>46666712"For you, the day Reimu Hakurei graced Makai was the most important day of your life.""But for me, it was Tuesday."
Where did it all go wrong, anons?All that innocence, that bright shining future that once laid before her, where did it all go?
>>46666814you can only take so many gohei/broom/ghost punches/flower elbows before your brain cells go out with the blood
>>46666832Alice had brains?
>>46666673How would Alice react if I hugged her and casually told her that I'll kill myself if she breaks up with me?
>>46653482Not being likeable
>>46657973The image limit isn't made of rubber
>>46658169Pffft lmaoo-Wait, a ThinkPad?I'm all ears.
>>46658404Anon what if your Yanhu is Jesus Christ
>>46667111
>>46666883Mai convinced Yuki to wear a micro-bikini?????dear god...
>>46667162No, that was Shinki's recommendation.
>>46667202Well tell her it might be working, although I'd happily lodge my face between the big-titty goddess' cantaloupes herself
>>46664129When did he say that?
>>46667202Why would Shinki do such a thing!
>>46667290Because it's a sure-fire way to score a hot stud as a husband, of course!
>>46667138Jesus 2hu is unironically the best yandere you can have. She'd probably never hurt or sabotage you.
>>46659519What if you go yandere for yourself?
>>46667111Then I already know her greatest weakness
>>46653482>YanhuThese are whores.
>>46667337Why thank you Shinki, that's really nice.So what does a goddess do around her for fun? You don't spend ALL day trying to set up your daughters for marriage, right?
>>46667458That's just called narcissism
>>46667337>score a hot studThis gave me persona 4 flashbacks. Will Yuki also refer to herself in the 3rd person as "Princess Yuki"?
>>46667068Invite me to the wedding will ya?
>>46667337What if Yuki brings home a fat, autistic man in his forties instead? Would Shinki be upset?
>>46674747Don't be silly.Shinki doesn't get upset, she is proactive and lets Yumeko come up with a solution.The solution is murder.
>>46674768Ah, so Shinki has a strict criteria that any suitor must follow then.
>>46674852The last time she allowed an autist in she ended up with Alice.She only wants the best for her daughters, anon.
>>46674862But Alice is perfect, anon. Maybe she should allow more autists into her family.
>>46674862...So you meant to tell me I have a shot with Shinki??Hot damn!! I need to get myself dressed!Steamy momsex doesn't have itself you know!
>>46674768But what if that makes Yuki sad?
>>46674968She gets like that every time she meets with Mai, anyway. It wouldn't make much of a difference.
>>46675044Doesn't Yuki suffer enough?
>>46674952God I want to date one of Shinki's more higher ranked daughters like Elis or Sacchan, make Shinki seethe for being an inferior man who does not live up to her expectations of me, and then get stolen by her just so she can get me to stop dating her daughter.
>>46657839When a man and a yokai love each other very much...
>>46681326Alt scenario: She's busy that day and has to get Yumeko to do it instead, since she's given up hope on the murder doll ever spawning offspring at all.The next forty-eight hours of your life is spent in Pandaemonium's basement as Yumeko conjures up deranged sex games because the only thing in her head is blood and violence, and she can't marry that up with anything romantic without it becoming perverse.
>>46667138Jesus a cute
A yandere yamawaro wont do a dam thing. easy girl to deal with really
>>46687438Would she be excited if I said I wanted to see her knife collection?
>>46687438That's right, that's absolutely right! A yandere Yamawaro is completely harmless and you should feel free to let your guard down around them. Even if they invite you over, you're perfectly safe. You can just head over for some free food and leave at your leisure.
>>46688078This is a ploy a trick a ruse yamawaro are known for this stuff and i wont fall for such things
>>46653482I'd be more than happy......>drug you to keep your loveNo need, Kokoro will forever be my cute daughterwife.
>>46688584kokoro would be a funny and spooky yanhuimagine seeing her from a distance and all she's doing is staring at you and licking her lips all with her unchanging emotionless expression
>>46690415Then you do some random thing and look back to see her wearing her Kishin mask
>>46667269>>44231649
>>46666832Is that Yuuka?
>>46688328Don't let your paranoia keep you away from a good time, anon! Yamawaro hospitality is famous, they even have special drinks they prepare for humans they like, you won't be harmed.
>>46653482Well, I have a gun.
>>46698436She sticks her finger down the barrel and causes it to peel itself open like a bannana when you fire it. --==BAD END==--Maybe guns work better on people that aren't supernaturally strong/tough
>>46698601I don't think Alice has that kind of power.
>>46698638Alice already rejected her humanity, anon...
>>46698996Did she have all that much to reject in the first place?
>>46708441Alice is more human than human.
