I'm 5'2 and ftm. I can't see a future for myself except transitioning, dropping off the face of the earth, and stealthing the rest of my life. Anything else fills me with untameable dread. I know that fundamentally it will not work. I'm an ugly woman and I'd make an uglier fake man, but I'd really rather be the ugliest man than the hottest woman. So maybe I'm just retarded. Being even 5'6 is a far off dream. It's so pathetic. I haven't masturbated for 3 years because my dysphoria has gotten so bad. I'm afraid people will think I only transitioned because I failed as a woman, and I have, but I've felt this way for as long as I can remember (to varying degrees). Chicken or the egg. Just getting worse.If it doesn't work, I'll just kill myself. Try not to drag it on if it's not working, save the embarrassment of failing to be a man or woman. Even fantasizing about my death, I want to do it the way people tell me a man would. A gunshot, no note, discovered long after it happens. In my perfect dream life, I'm tall and have a short wife and we have a dog. I want all the little classic clashes of stereotypical heterosexual marriage. She says she feels protected with me. I have a union job, I'm friends with men who don't really give a fuck about me but think I'm funny (or stupid). I want to have a hairy body and rough hands and a buzzcut. I want to get random boners.Thinking so hard about it feels fembrained.
>>35496548You're just going to end up an ugly broad with a beard and fucked up tits trying to get dick on doublelist.
>>35496548Transitioning is always worthwhile. Get on T, start gym maxing and work out the logistics of everything else later.
The one thing I like about poons is that even I can mog them
>>35496548sorry lil dood!
>>35496548i thought i was an ugly woman until i got on t and now i look back at old photos and i was not in fact fat, hairy, ugly, or looking like a man in makeup. i was like a normal attractive woman. unfortch the me in my head was a bear and i didnt know it. isnt that weird... ive been on t for 2 years and i still dont fully pass, u have so much time to try it out. i was lukewarm on hrt before i started it but i knew within the first week that it was right for me. and my life has only gotten better. people dont care or are really supportive in my case. best side affect was i didnt post stuff like urs on the internet anymore. like everything that used to make me yearn and suffer and ruminate over just.. like didnt matter anymore. so chill. literally the roots go so deep man
Keep fighting manletbro
>>35496548>I'm 5'2 and ftm. I can't see a future for myself except transitioning, dropping off the face of the earth, and stealthing the rest of my life.Same except I’m mtf
>>35496548I transitioned and my mind feels clearer than everT flowing though my veins and elucidating every thought I have; I'm stoic and pensive now, no more gross, girly thoughts, no more fembrained emotiveness, just me, as a MAN
