>>23314168 #
>go to college again
No way.they already ruined my life once
And I'm never doing tech either. Fuck that.
The only reason I would go back to school would be for Art as a non degree seeking student. But I can't get in anywhere for that and it's expensive

>>23314204
I've watched plenty of Hitler speeches and they're usually just uninteresting, corny, or obviously dishonest (we want a peaceful wholesome chungus community etc)

Both sides act like they are some activation fuel for crazy murdery white people but they're really just lame.

>And they are smiling, the arena floor slamming under the All-stars and the fans grinning hideously over their official merchandise. Towering over them all is Tay Tay and she is smiling, her big lips lively and quick and practiced and stretching at the ladies, huge and plastic and empty, like and enormous mannequin. She never fakes, she says. She says she's just like you. She bows to the fans and sashays backwards and throws back her head and smiles red on the lips and she is a great favorite, Tay Tay. She sways her hair and the straightened locks of her skull pass glimmering under the lights and she swings about and sings about one of her exes and she moans and it's two exes, three exes, four and five exes at once. Her lips are light and nimble. She never fakes. She says that she's just like you. She smiles in light and in shadow and she is a great favorite. She never fakes, Tay Tay. She is smiling, smiling. She says that she's just like you.

>>23314210
Do you have any idea how bad weimar was

Fuk u bingbong guyyy

>>23314222
Hitler was unironically a lame, sensitive young man.

Any of you guys dealing with being near or in your 30s and having a somewhat decent job but not really entered a career or committed to it? I’m in this weird situation where I have an okay job, but I really need an advanced degree to have any future in the career, but I don’t have one.

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Nick Land but he's italian.

Three days ago, I started learning Chinese for no reason whatsoever. Right now I'm going through Bopomofo, 200 common IT words, all the classifiers(180 in total), and a deck of 7500 normal words. I go through 40 new words of the latter everyday, and the rest are almost entirely finished. I already know Japanese, and so most of the stuff so far has been very easy, the only problem being memorizing the pronounciation of all the characters. Oh, and Bopomofo too I guess. I don't actually need to learn it, and just writing pinyin and then converting to the characters themselves is not only what I'm already used to with Japanese but also just simpler in general, but I thought It'd be fun to learn it. It's "just" a new alphabet, so it's not that hard anyway. I think in another three days or so I'll be able to utilize it a lot better, and after that it'll mostly just be me gradually raising my writing speed.
I've been watching anime with Traditional Chinese subs to get used to the language, it's fun to see the ways that it differs from Japanese, both in general and the characters in specific. I can already catch some sentences here and there, not with a "Japanese understanding" like it was the case up until now, but some fresh, new "Chinese understanding" that while still only being a tiny seed, is rapidly growing. If I can keep up my 40 cards a day, and get an adequate amount of interesting material to go through, I should probably get quite decent at it within two months. Yesterday I looked through the list of most commonly accessed sites for Taiwan, and found a BBS that has some channels in it for the discussion of gacha, games, and some other stuff. Does anybody here happen to know of any such similar sites? Also about bilibili, I've heard that as a foreigner you are required to upload pictures of your ID, front and back, to register to the site. Are there any ways to dodge this, or to acquire a phone number from the mainland, so that I can circumvent this?

animu, animu!
does whatever animu does!

can history move faster, come on already

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What happened in prehistory?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmgIN1sDjrw

>>23314326
gommunism... NOW!

I've literally been drowning in nostalgia on purpose since I was a kid. I asked for a gamecube when the wii was out for years because on some level I knew even then I wanted to go back to good times.
I've never felt "home" since I was 6

>>23314326
Careful what you wish for

>>23314328
Damn he has a massive dick

What are you doing with your life? I want to do a philosophy PhD but I think I’m too old now.

>need help
>there is no help
>do what you can
>its not enough
>repeat

>>23314364
Nothing. I got a computer science degree 5 years ago and I haven't worked a job or done anything since. I really hate my life. I regret everything

>>23314368
is this you >>23314209

>>23314375
diffreant anon but what if I wanted to go back? I want to get a STEM degree but last time I did anything related to STEM was about 5 years ago and my skills are beyond rusty, also it doesnt help I originally failed to secure a loan... but fuck sake I do want to learn

>>23314385
It's never too late, both to return to college and to freshen up your skills and your learning capacity.

>>23314368
5 years, so you’re like 27 or 28?

new TSwift has like 3 good songs (out of 31 tracks total)

>>23314396
You're doxxing me...

>>23314393
yeah, thats not the hard part. The hard part is always the details, like how would I even do that. I wish I could meet people like that so I could ask how exactly they went about it.

He's dope he knows that,
but he's broke, he's stagnant

I Now noue wat I mussed do Wifh me Fortune on My endevorf

I think I have carpal tunnel.

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>>23314364
I dropped out of high-school and became a NEET. Almost 30 but I’m unironically the happiest person I know. Currently I’m ballsdeep in amateur botany. I go innawoods and draw the trees and shrubs. It behooves me how people can look at the varied shapes of leaves and not see how its the coolest shit ever

i'm not the best, i just lack all conviction.

>lost the weight
>went back to school
>got the degree
>got the house
>got the job
>all major goals complete to obtain comfortable independence
>1 year later
>utterly bored and every time I sit still longer than an hour I think of how I am more or less essentially waiting to die
>freak out at this thought and come up with random bullshit to keep my brain distracted from this
I am very clearly missing something

>>23314455
>behooves
baffles

>>23314455
I want to kill myself

>>23314467
Why? Are you this anon >>23314209

>>23314463
I’m not the worst, I’m just full of passionate intensity

At this rate, everyone is going to enjoy my book EXCEPT THE ONE PERSON I FUCKING WROTE IT FOR

>>23314477
im not neutral, im just habitually fickle

I can't help but feel annoyed at the explosion of 'Ivy League schools are hotbeds of antisemitism!' posts from the Jewish and kosher-conservative circles, today..

If I'm not mistaken, nearly every President of these schools is Jewish (7 of the top 8, if memory serves?), as are the all of the largest donors, as are a vastly disproportionate number of their leading professors - as are the students, with Jewish Americans being by far the most overrepresented group (10x - 30x overrepresentation, depending on the data one trusts), relative to non-Jewish White males being far and away the most 'discriminated against'.

In fact, if Jews were indeed semites, it'd seem far more truthful and accurate to state that Ivy League campuses are hotbeds of semitism.

Is it the case that the disproportionately Jewish professors are having much of their decades of virulently anti-White curriculum and propaganda now backfire against Zionism and the state of Israel?

Yes, very likely, at least to some degree - the hatred they've preached toward others is now being directed against them, in certain respects - it just feels strange to strongly sympathize, here, all things considered.

>>23314504
Oh no we've got to defend these poor ivy league schools

>>23314210
People are naturally evil. We are not far removed from animals. It takes a lot of moral education to turn us into good humans.
The Germans of back then, like the many other Europeans of back then, didn't find it so terrible to genocide another people, if they could get away with it.
Many other Europeans had already does it before them.
The Israelis are doing it right now.

I can't help but fear and mistrust every animal. I don't like dogs or cats at all either. Even though I like nature. But yeah I feel nothing for dogs and cats and I don't like them. They can probably tell to.

>>23314504
How is criticizing colonialism and imperialism hatred?
What what does all of it have to do with being white or Jewish or whatever else?

Does anyone else feel torn between two different social classes?
Half of me is very middle class: I'm highly educated (Dr.) and have a career in scientific research.
The other half is very working class: I want to live in a rural home stead, drive a tractor around and have a junk yard full of old cars, that I can trash around the property at my leisure.

>>23314555
Yeah. Gonna side with the higher class because the petit bourgeouis is evil

>>23314532
Despite being a full blooded American i don't give a shit about pets and I'd eat dog and cat fine. I don't get what people don't just have kids.

>>23314558
Although I lean left I never bothered to figure out who you are trying to refer to by "bourgeois" in this day and age. Wouldn't it be better to use more appropriate modern terms?

>>23314555
I feel classless cultureless and nationless
T. 2nd generation immigrant orphan who went from lower class to upper middle and now lives a low class lifestyle but unemployed off of my savings

>>23314562
It blows my mind that there are loads of people who hate kids but love pets. Like if they had to choose between saving their dog or a random kid they'd choose the dog.
And people see nothing wrong with that.

To me, if you equate the life of a dog/cat/whatever with that of a human, you're automatically evil.

>>23314574
What race is the hypothetical kid?

>>23314577
I hope you don't call yourself a Christian.

>>23314566
Upper Middle class bad. Grug side with upper upper class.

>>23314574
I know a 33 ye a r old married woman who says she still feels 14 and is unprepared to have kids and wishes she could put it off until she was 50
Naturally she has tons of pets.

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>>23314536
They always use the language of anti-colonialism and anti-capitalism to make excuses for expressions of anti-White enmity, whenever it be in culture, hiring, politics, etc. Because deep down their followers share it. Books like White fragility are made today as a modern Kulak dynamic that attacks White demographics.

The Jewish authors and professors who speared headed this for decades are getting to a taste of their own medicine because for the explicit case of Gaza, and they’re pissed off. Why? because it wasn’t meant to be about “colonialism,” it was entirely to just attack White people.

Is it inherently shameful to be a virgin
Is it bad to wish for a future partner to also be a virgin?

I once sat there on a bench, then a big fat cat came and sat on my lap. I petted it for a good hour straight, then somebody came and told me that it's clearly very diseased. I took a close look and saw that it is indeed diseased. Then I petted it for another half hour and then went back home.
>>23314601
No and no.

>>23314574
Child replacement.

you can't just use the same OP picture as the last wwoym you little punk

>>23314592
I don't find that to be so bad.
She is aware of her immaturity and caring enough to avoid bringing kids into a situation that might not be suitable for them.

>>23314519
The Anglos elite during that time have starved whole populations off, they’re genuinely evil and it’s something that Hitler talked about and condemned before the war.

>>23314607
Yeah but why are you so immature!!! Its crsxy!!!! Just grow up!!!

>>23314596
I don't think you have a strong argument.
You had to resort to finding a quote from an extremist in a fucked up country.
Clearly this sort of speech is not widespread.
Also, I am white and don't feel any of this white persecution you are feeling, sorry.

>>23314601
1. No.
2. Only if you are not virgin.

>>23314611
Yep and then we emerged from the war believing in the moral superiority of the western world, purely based on us having defeated the definition of evil: the Nazis.
Funny, the lies we tell ourselves.

>>23314602
>>23314620
Am I a volcel if several girls have wanted to either date or fuck me and I said No but I'm still desperate to lose my virginity and I feel like a loser and I'm almost 30?

I feel so weird about this whole thing. I wish sex wasn't so weird with constant shame wrapped up in it. The constant shittalk gets to me.

>>23314204
Pascal showed me that Christ isn't just a larp. I couldn't believe that I did, and was in a panic for a month, but it's settling in now.

>>23314635
Why do you care about labels?
Do whatever feels right.

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>>23314615
It… has? in the past and still to this day.

>>23314632
there’s something deeply ironic that the liberals believe the might might right mindset. Guess every accusation is a confession.

>>23314652

>persecution is when the government stops me from oppressing others
You would fit right in with the modern Nazis in Israel.

>>23314646
I am what others think of me.

>>23314668
>Freedom of association is oppression.
Access to White people isn’t a human right, they were forced at gun point to accept different demographics into their neighborhoods, this destroyed whole cities and caused the massive crime spike after the 60s. Those neighborhoods never recovered, and things only gotten worse race wise since people are trying to make enough money to escape the oppressive Civil Rights act.

>>23314685

Racism went down significantly. People like you are scared to talk openly. Society improved a whole lot since back then.

>>23314635
Yeah. Assuming of course you are still capable of fucking, and you didn't lose your chances or something.
>>23314671
No matter what you do and how you are there will always be at least a few people out there who despise you. If what you said is true, then I suggest that you get a proper sense of self and stop caring so much about what others who you do not value think about you.

>>23314581
Not anymore, for exactly that reason. I'd chose my golden retriever over the lives of a hundred million black children.

>>23314689
There's nothing worse in 2024 than being a virgin. Being a racist rapist is better.

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what is truth? and what's the deal with Pilate?

>>23314710
What about a rapist virgin?

Fuck the romans. I feel zero connection to my own parents. Why do I have to pretend to be into rome

I stayed in my college town after I graduated to work at my alma mater. I’ve been doing that ever since and I really, really regret it. I feel almost like those people who never left their hometown.

>>23314364
Dropped out of university my freshman year, went to a community college, dropped out again when covid started, did construction work for a few years then went back to college. Had a a hard-core nazi phase, went through a Christian awakening, the became a depressed drunk, then became a fun drunk, then became a high functioning drunk, had another Christian awakening, stopped drinking, had a big family tragedy and became a Christian drunk. I'll be applying to law schools soon, and if for whatever reason that doesn't work out, I'll get a teaching credential and be a drunk high school english teacher.

>>23314464
Make new goals :)

>>23314555
My mom is literally a meth addict trailer park white trash woman while my dad is well educated, professional, upper middle class. So yeah I feel my white trash side come out sometimes and it bothers me

>>23314558
>Is that a white collar family in the suburbs with 2 kids and an SUV?
>EVIL DISGUSTING CAPITALIST PIGS, PUBLICALLY EXECUTE THEM AND RAPE THE CHILDREN

>>23314464
A purpose for your life

>the one and only dedicated fan of my substack is someone who goes by "incel retard"

>>23314399
No I just want to know so I can give some advice is all.

>>23314739
It annoys me how many posts I see saying exactly this shit. You people are all generic clones

I feel like I really fucked myself over by putzing around these last few years. I should have applied for the doctoral program years ago, but COVID made me wfh and I was enjoying that so I just put it off and put it off. It’s weird to apply now, but if I don’t, this will have all been pointless. It probably already is pointless.

>>23314760
what's your substack about?
that's hilarious btw

>>23314751
I wouldn't ever use the term "white trash". I am not ashamed of my working class background. I wish I could take turns being middle class on some days and working class on other days.

>>23314782
There's a difference between white trash and working class. Namely that most white trash doesn't even work

>>23314758
This seems like it will be a more vague journey for me

>>23314719
Gay

i can only drink for two days in a row before i start to have all manner of problems. i used to be able to go for months at a time. now it's 48 hours. maybe i fried all my organs. maybe it's in my head. but i'm on my third night and oh God do i feel horrible.

>>23314763
They’re probably all me because I’m obsessive.

>>23314798
It's called being thirty years of age or older.

>>23314809
i'm 26 i'm just an alcoholic

>>23314714
Jesus Christ

>>23314815
When I drink I get the wicked shits.

Had a sad realization. Lately I have been upset about my ex leaving me a few months ago. I begged in every way for her to stay. Sent countless text ramblings and have cried an undeterminable amount of times. I just realized though, that possibly her need to be friends after leaving had to do with her being in a manic episode and seeing it as the only way to stay connected for the time being. I obviously wasn't able to piece this together and insisted and pleaded as to why we couldn't be in a relationship. I had sent her a text a month ago and woke up extremely embarrassed and decided to block her as to save myself the embarrassment of whatever she potentially had to say. I'm now wondering if this caused more issues. Idk, I feel really bad about the situation now. What an awful thing. I hate this so much. I can't handle this and the end of the semester right now.

My afternoon/eve is chugging along smoothly, how about youselves?

>>23314852
Going fine. Played a good match of Counterstrike. Now I'm going to have a smoke and read text for my essay on Russell's acquaintance and description. Also got some eel and rice.

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>>23314864
Nice nice. I just had some frozen samosas and fish sticks for dinner. Right before that I was reading Dune Messiah (almost finished). Another 5 mins and I'll be done the book probably. For now tho I'm toking on a cannabis oil vape and shitposting while listening to the new High On Fire record. By the way the new T. Swift album is surprisingly mediocre with only like two really good songs on it. Oh, well. So it goes I guess.

>>23314864
>Counterstrike
Cool kind(1.5 1.6) or gay kind(the rest)?

Stuff I never talk about, either because no one asks or the subject is impossible to discuss in real life:
Work-related guilt due to fears that I made the wrong decisions at one point or another and ended up burdening people, causing trouble for my subordinates, or being the straw that broke the camel's back for people who ended up quitting, exacerbated by my fairly stressful and demanding career field and the expectations of my supervisors.
Very specific subjects within my career field, which I am fairly passionate about even though most people are only in it to make money.
Fears that the people I know and spend time with secretly resent having me around and that the way they act around me is some kind of elaborate in-joke which I cannot pick up on, exacerbated by my probable autism and lack of solid social skills.
A fairly childish fantasy involving getting swept up in some stirring Great Cause, which will lead me to embark on an adventure of some kind and during which I will lose my way and only find it by being true to some greater ideal.
How much I really love philosophy, even if I'm a complete dilettante when it comes to the field, and how I wish that I had someone to discuss it with in real life.
How I secretly want to write poetry.
Wanting to meet a nice girl and start a family in America in the year 2024.
Very elaborate fantasies about entering a monastery and living a life of simplicity and poverty despite never so much as being baptized.

>>23314839
Behold: a borderline personality disorder male

Taylor Swift is a beautiful Aryan goddess.

>>23314620
There are plenty of guys who aren't virgins who want a virgin partner. In most conservative cultures young men will have premarital sex but will still expect to marry a virgin

>>23314555
Both the rich and the working class are the same scum, neither of them really produce anything or care about anything besides their instant gratification. I prefer to be an artist, the only species that makes life worthwhile just imagine a world with music or literature or painting, it would hell

My ass is a swamp.

>>23314912
What makes you say so?

SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU JEWISH CRYBABY FUCKS I'm tired of you fucking cretins whining about the Holocaust because some 19 year old college student is sitting on your lawn

>>23315022
Silence, Yuro.

>>23314771
It doesn't have much of a coherent theme so far. I've just been posting things I wanted to write.

It was this post which won over Mr. Retard, which I suppose isn't so surprising: https://moonlitmeetings.substack.com/p/the-artist

>>23314995
>t. Angry loner

Dune 3.5/5
Dune Messiah: 5/5
Children of Dune: TBD

>>23314864
>vidya
>past the age of 17
lmao, lol

There’s no worse feeling than realizing you wasted years of your finite life. So this is how NEETs feel…

i actually prefer the term "cummer" to "coomer". cummer is purely descriptive and accurate, whereas coomer seeks to moralize about the act of frequently blowing loads. some people in the cummer community have advocated for the reclamation of "coomer", but i see it as inherently hurtful and dehumanizing.

>>23314891
You sound like someone I could get along with IRL.

Do you know anyone in the foreign service? I’m kicking myself for not trying to get a job in the foreign service.

there are no acceptable uses of violence or force of any kind.

>>23315129
What about when I hit my gf because her cooking sucks?

>>23315110
God Emp: 10/5

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>>23315164
>mfw I'm a God Emperor as well as a worm

>>23314204

Is someone considered a virgin if he's straight but has only had sex with twinks?

>>23315198
no he's called someone I have extreme envy for.

I'll splatter you like Jackson Pollock.

I need to find examples of people who learned to do something late in life and made a career and got good. I just feel so demoralized. I want to learn to draw. But I'm an old ass man. I'm ancient. Its too late for me to do what I want in life. I'm 26 after all.

you ever feel like life is continuously pushing you on toward some kind of breaking point where your whole approach to life changes, but this has happened 1000 times before and you tried the alternate lifestyles and none of them worked so you're just kinda autistically brainstorming ways to not be a loser because your brain keeps demanding you do this even though you know it's not really possible?

>>23315260
one of the biggest patreon artists never drew until age 27 or so. cutesexyrobutts i think?

>>23315260
>26
>late in life

I wish Carthage won the Punic Wars

>>23315272
To start from absolute zero? Yeah, 26 is extremely late.

>>23315260
There is zero market for this skill in the English speaking world. Only the japanese have a clear career path that doesnt require a degree

>>23315265
Ive decided to let go and just be a big shitkid pissbaby throwing tantrums all the time and being the mentally and emotionally unstable bastard i was born to be its kino I threw a big crying tantrum at the beach and walked into the water wearing my clothes being pushed over by the waves and looked up to see a kid just staring at me
There are plenty of healthy and normal people in the world. The majority are. So I get to be my own little ruined self

>>23315277
Its over...An anon told me on 4chan I will never be happy because I spent 26 years of my 80 year lifespan not knowing what I want to do...

Just finished Dune Part Two, I don't get what everyone is blowing their load over. It wasn't bad, I actually liked it, but it wasn't amazing.

>>23315325
To be fair, roughly eight or ten of those twenty six were the most active, vital and mobile years of your life.
It's never going to get better than that, biologically speaking.

>>23315334
Bah, nonsense.

>>23314912
They congregate here

>>23315332
visual story telling, show don't tell
it's movie critic stuff that people are splooging over

>>23314602
You did that cat a kindness. It will only know pain until it dies yet you comforted it before its final moments.

>>23315334
better? no, not better. but with proper lifestyle choices that fall off can be far less dramatic than you imply.

>>23315393
Knowing the type of person who uses this website those lifestyle choices are probably not being made.

>>23315375
noice

>>23315396
Thanks!

>>23315334
>just give up on what you want because your body is worse or something
Thats fucking stupid and a big hole in your argument is ever 30+ athlete who still beats out people in their 20s.
Also its an argument that ONLY works for the physical aspect of you. Quit this demoralizing black pill shit. Next you'll say
>crystallization
as a reason to give up on life in your late 20s.
Absolute insanity. The internet is pure mind poison.

>>23315398
i think i saw you also post your bird in the other thread before this. i enjoy seeing them :)

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>>23315400

>>23315375
Ummm sweetie this is write what's on your mind not draw what's on your mind

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>>23315414

I'm all cozy in bed with my cat by my side gn

>>23315430
Birds are cool. I share my last name with the name of a bird. I wonder if maybe my ancestor raised those birds or what.

>>23315444
Sleep well, anon.

Still thinking about how stupid most people are. I noticed this pattern where when there's a conversation between 2 people and there's a specific topic, one of them might ask a question that is completely stupid and irrelevant to the topic which is expected, but what happens from the other party is that they just go along with it, they won't say "what are you talking about", "that has nothing to do with what we're talking about". They will just kind of act like they know the answer when there's no answer because there's no question. And they somehow maintain the flow of the conversation like actual NPCs. Or sometimes the question is so stupid that there's a one word answer but they never answer it with a single word. They always try to complicate it. Basically, things are easier and simpler than they seem. People just like to complicate concepts for whatever reason. As a kid I used to be intimidated by these concepts but now I realize it's the people who make it difficult.

>>23315444
goodnight and give your kitty a kiss for me

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Just whipped this up for lunch, probably won't need to eat again for the rest of the day, so filling and delicious, my favourite part was the avocado and rice.

>>23315470
very, very nice.

>>23315456
It would just seem autistic to question what someone said and breaking it down when you're just talking about where you're going to eat at or something so you just go along to seem cordial. Unless you talk to someone you actually care about and want to converse with, why ask your NPC cowoker what they meant when they said that NPC thing? I just nod along even if I don't understand what the fuck they're talking about and imagine most people do to avoid problems or to not make things awkward.

I quite like a lot of threads on /lit/ but when a bad thread is made, my goodness is it impressively bad. Astoundingly so. The Buddhist thread up right now peaked my interest but the utter drivel by both buddhist defenders and critics is so asinine as to be a /pol/ thread in disguise.

>>23315470
Euro?

>Dreamt up complete and utter kino, fully fleshed out world, characters, and plot, an amazing twist, this was gonna be a best seller and franchise for sure
>next morning completely forget it all, only know that i dreamt kino

Always write down notes anons

>>23315484
Australian.

>>23315456
>>23315478
There's a cold open of The Office where two interns question why they mindlessly clap whenever something elicits any kind of emotion. They conclude: just keep clapping.
>>23315483
*piqued

>>23315478
For me, it's more of an effort to go along than to just say "that has nothing to do with this" and ignore their question. I'm not talking about random small talk, which I can maintain just fine but they sometimes take the conversation into more serious/technical topics without realizing that this doesn't qualify as small talk for me anymore so I'm going to be more detailed and precise with my responses and I expect them to do the same.

>>23314455
As subjects go, botany is among the most beautiful. In the suburban neighborhood I grew up in, in windy autumn weather, I could tell tell which of the nearby silver maples the leaves on the lawn came from, since the species has subtle variations in leaf shape. In a classroom assignment, at 10, we were tasked with growing something, and I started a maple tree from seed in a Sir Walter Raleigh can, and by 30 it was tall as our two-story house. My favorite kind of trees are blooming apples. The varieties of them are goddamn endless, and I count myself very lucky that my front door is near to two magnificent specimens of them, each about 60 years old, almost hallucinatory in their beauty when at peak bloom. I remember vaguely that there's a huge botanical preserve somewhere in Washington State or whatever where about 5000 varieties of apple trees are kept in orderly cultivation.

>>23314204
I can't stop memorizing poems and reciting them to myself while I walk my dog or go about my day. Am I autistic?

>>23315493
You can't, I mean really cannot, expect much from normals when it comes to conversation or casual debate, anon. Everyone just wants to play their roles and then just leave, same as before. There is no vying for intellectual superiority, there are no social stakes beyond staying in the same social strata or possibly appearing more clever than you initially let on. But it's all a ruse, a masquerade: these people don't want to participate in any intellectual or uplifting conversation; they want their initial beliefs to be confirmed and supported, their lazy repartee to be answered and checked like a tired vaudeville act. Don't ask or expect too much from these people, they want of spirit.

>>23314933
not true, I live in such a conservative culture and most men remain virgin, only the scum go around fucking prostitutes and what not and then expect a virgin wife

Dune Messiah was easily better than Dune.

>>23314995
>just imagine a world with music or literature or painting
it's been almost a decade since I read a book, I rarely listen to music on purpose and I never enjoyed looking at paintings

>>23315503
start writing poetry mother fucket ura poet

>>23315503
What poems have most recently memorized? I remember when I was 16-19, I memorized a lot of Keats, Shelley, Eliot, Pound, Sor Juana, Schiller, Dickinson, Baudelaire, Verlaine, Mallarmé. I used to recite the Love Song of J Alfred Prufrock on the lawn outside college classes,

>>23315493
Most people don't think twice about anything so it bothering you is more unusual than it not bothering them. At least that's how normies function. What you're talking about can be extrapolated to anything else and you'll see how nobody questions anything and prefers conformity and not addressing uncomfortable truths. >>23315498
I guess autism is like that anyway. What's unconscious for normies is conscious for you which is why they seem like an entire different species or that everything seems effortless for them but not you. Autists tend to overanalyze things while for others it's just a normal everyday thing they do without thinking about it.

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What are these stars in these heavens? What are these crickets speaking about? Why do these birds chirp? Why when my son opens the door do I run to it? Who hung these stars here? Who hung this little man here? Where did I come from? The dust? The dirt? What do I eat? The dust? The dirt? Where does love spring from? Why is it so present and so elusive? Have you gazed up and worried? Worried how the stars knew to stay in their constellations? Who named these constellations? What were they like? What did they believe? The built up these stories. What little time they had to give to putting something on a note for the future? Where do these thoughts come from? Where do they go? Have I drank the cup of madness? Or have I just seen more truth?

>>23315529
>23315498
>NTA, but "autism" is probably the case. I have autism and noticed this difference in my thinking of conscious overanalysis (see The Centipede's Dilemma) versus normies unconscious quickness, basically Kahneman's System 2 versus System 1 (looks like this theory has replication problems according to Wikipedia). It's probably actually rational for normies because they avoid issues like analysis paralysis, something I suffer from.
Dunno wye the poster deleted their post.
I find a lot of social intelligence and engineering has to do with an intuitive instinct that is lacking in the autistic spectrum; but, the abstract, spectral aspect of thought is more than overcompensating for this lacking trait.

>>23314351
I relate. I had a weird experience when I was 7. We were driving home from somewhere at night, I kept saying 'i wanted something'. For a bit my mom was trying to ask if I was hungry or tired or bored or what but I remember trying to figure out myself what I wanted. Running through lists of things to do or have and none of them seemed good and j started cryin. Kind of feel like that was a step upwards in developing the self or a rational part or something. It felt really deep and like nothing before.

>>23315522
Recently: Cities and Thrones and Powers, Brahma, the Tyger, Chapter Heading by Hemingway. I'm gonna check out some Pound tonight.

>>23315543
Yeah thanks for saving their post because I wasn't sure if I replied to the right anon. Autists tend to lack that intuitive aspect when it comes to the way they function in their everyday life and interaction with people and the world around them. This intuitive aspect is even more important when it comes to socializing with others which is why there's a gap between them and non autistic people. An ideal person would have the logical aspects of autists and the more instinctive aspects that normals tend to have but it seems like most people lack in one or the other.

not sure if I should still invite this girl for another date, we seem to be talking well and the time with her is fun but there just seems to be no physical intimacy or closeness at all.
Don't know what's gonna be the result of this

>>23314204
----Solaria ---
9077
Accidental Majesty

The trees of recent years have taken on a certain size

Banked like subtle mountains that ensconce
Dwellings of surreal security.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgL5sEBraNk

>>23315560
Ask yourself, are you looking for physical intimacy when you hang out with this girl? Or do you genuinely value their company and conversation? I've been on both fronts, and I can honestly answer that the most meaningful conversations have come from nights I've spent talking to girls who have piqued my interest and kept my dick hard. There is a trade off to meaningful social relations.
>>23315553
We can talk all about ideal people, idealized conversations, until the cows come home. We can dream an internal logic, fantasize a perfect conversation, but we can't change the fact that most people don't think like we do.
And, I'm not trying to romanticize our predicament or paint it in any romantic colors. Only, the social aspect of daily life always intrudes upon our forward thinking: we want to think better of people, but those same people only want to tear us down. It's not their fault, they can only operate within the strictures of a social bond. If we can truly see beyond ourselves, we can see these social bonds as being ultimately limiting to spiritual growth and awareness of the other as an extension of our empathetic instinct: we are not meant to mimic other species' patterns, but to reflect and refract their social intelligence. When you feel checked by your social ignorance, only think on how this new self-awareness is only possible because you are on the outside-looking-in, like a fishbowl, rather than inside-looking-out, like a cave.

>>23315581
>are you looking for physical intimacy when you hang out with this girl? Or do you genuinely value their company and conversation?
I want both of these things, especially because I find her physically attractive

>>23314204
Hello everyone, I have psychosexual problems. First I'll tackle the psycho, then I'll manage the sexual. No but seriously, my dad fucked me up.
Recently I finally got the chance to have sex, I'm 23. But I felt completely depersonalized, like my eyes were windows and my hands were robot arms. I also couldn't take any kind of dominant position, felt like id be doing something bad if I did.
So yeah I knew I was going to have problems with sex but it seems to be weirder than I thought.

>>23315590
Hate to break it to you, anon, but I can vouch for all fronts on this predicament:
>are you looking for physical intimacy when you hang out with this girl?
>do you genuinely value their company and conversation?
I have been on both of these ends, and on the rare occasion where both of these applied: the first always ends in an unsatisfying sense of simping; and the other is just a cope for a girl that is either too ugly to lust after, or a girl that is too hot to realistically chase.
The rare combination of both is a girl I still think about, every day, to this day.

>>23314204
----Solaria ---
9078
Chemistry

There's a kind of love at first sight
Between civilizers.

He was a little bewildered by some of my references
But easy to be near all the while.

>>23315611
The true definition of being a Chad is a guy who can get that girl that is both smart as fuck and hot as fuck.
The rest of us have to compromise or refuse to date dumb/ugly girls.

does anyone here actually believe that we live in a democracy?

>>23315663
Not everyone here is American, sar.

>>23315668
I'm European, though.

>>23315670
Do you think you live in a democracy?

>>23315675
No.

I actually can't go two days without fapping. I get so down and depressed.

Taylor Swift is having my baby

Does anybody else sign up for class action lawsuit settlements?

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Not to state the obvious but one of the most frustrating, difficult to handle parts of 9-5 life is the repetition. In general my mood and attitude in life is trending toward one of greater day to day optimism and confidence, but it gets hard to maintain that on a day to day basis when I'm faced with the same bedroom walls, the same colleagues, the same city streets, the same conversations with my housemate. I do well to stay positive 75% of the time, but those 25% are rough. I need a change, of course, but I can't think of one that wouldn't completely upend my life. A new hobby won't suffice, I've tried that.

Perhaps I do need a big change. Move countries, etc.

imagine being fucked mercilessly by an elephant seal

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>>23315260
It's not you being 26 that's the problem. Its the fact that you think you're gonna take forever to get better. Yeah, 26 is old. I'm 26 too. But do you know why its tougher to learn something new as you grow older? Its because you already have a habit, a way of life you live, that may or may not enable you to learn. So having to unlearn AND relearn takes a lot of effort. Its not impossible, but its a bigger hurdle. I suggest you start now, regardless. Else you wanna come back here when you're in late 30s and complain about how everyone's already ahead of you.

>>23315708
The crushing weight would probably be the worst part. Do they pack major dong?

>>23315715
Gosh I hope so.

I don't get why people hate the Jews so much. Just let them be. What's the big deal with them?

>>23315725
>They, like, control the banks and stuff, they could totally fuck us over if they wanted to.
You mean like any other group of people could if they ran the banks?
>Uh, uh, uh...

>>23315729
I never got that.
If you hate the banks, why not hate on bankers?

>why people hate the jews so much
probably because of the genocide they're doing and them not wanting to be next, that and them being liars and cheats
>just let them be
we tried that ever since ww2, they just got cocky over it
>what's the big deal with them
culturally sociopaths that see everyone on the outside as animals, incompatible people who have 0 empathy or sympathy for the goyim who will never stop pushing the line because they don't even consider you a human
>>23315729
at least most other groups aren't trying to fulfill some fucked up prophecy by imploding europe

most in the west are accustomed to a structure of hierarchy where a bunch of rich assholes just do whatever they want and live in luxury, the problem with the jews is that they're a nepotistic group who pretty much don't care if they sink the ship that they're in because they have 0 roots to any nation

>>23315734
>probably because of the genocide they're doing
That's Israel not Jews.
Jews worldwide don't automatically support Israel.
Nazi Germany also pretended to be working for the benefit of all Germans and other Aryans, but of course most non-Germans did not actually support it.

There are actually a ton of anti-Israeli Jews.

>>23315736
>Jews worldwide don't automatically support Israel
good one
>there are jews that would choose goyim over their own
good one

next tell me that everyone can make it if they just have enough can do attitude and wishful thinking

>>23315738
You're some weird sort of communist Nazi. Very sad. You're not going to get very far in life with that sort of thinking.

>>23315742
>you don't agree with and pity the jews? you must be a communist... and a nazi.. somehow
jesus you're scraping the bottom of the barrel aren't you

>>23315734
>probably because of the genocide they're doing
Lmao.

>>23315745
i don't have to like palestinians to realize that we already agreed that genocide = no no during ww2, jews just didn't get the memo and thought that they're above the rules

>>23315743
I never told you to pity the Jews.
There's just no reason to lump everyone with a cut dick in one group and label them as evil.
It's just stupid.

All the weird accusations you accuse Jews of, could actually apply much more readily to Americans.
Americans control the world in the most literal sense, Americans start wars and destroy whole countries, instigate coups, use corrupt deals to steal resources, spy on everyone.... etc
Should I start hating on every single American now?

>b-but we're not israel
it's literally your country, if you're against what they're doing use your jewish influence to stop them
>no such thing
oh yeah, and your country clubs are open for all ethnic groups and aren't jew exclusive

>>23315753
depends, you can hate the american oligarchs and the people who influence those decisions, just like people hate the jewish oligarchs and the people who influence those decisions

>>23315745
It's blatantly obvious to everyone who doesn't have a stick up their ass that Israel have been slowly eradicating the Palestinians.

But I don't automatically accuse all Jews of that crime.

jews are what they accuse what people of being, nepotistic in group with a "privilege" in business deals with the in group, just can't call them out on it so everyone blames whites confusing the fuck out of trailer park bill on when his white privilege is coming in

>>23315756
Why then lump all Jews together? Do you think every single Jew has a direct telephone line to Satanyahu?

Satanyahu and the IDF murdered a ton of the hostages during Oct 7 by shelling the whole place with their helicopters and tanks.
And have been shelling Gaza with complete disregard to how many Israeli hostages they will murder in the process.

In Germany and the US, Satanyahu orders the governments of these countries to arrest Jewish pro-Palestinian protestors.

>>23315754
OK let me give you an example to show how stupid your thinking is. Take the China, a country of some 1.4 billion people. They are similarly nepotistic. Their oligarch class controls the country. They do have their own private high society clubs all over the world too.
Does that mean that every random Chinese person is to be blamed for the decisions and actions of these Chinese elites?

>>23315769
>it's not us, it's our oligarchs
good to know, now lets see the average chinese citizen and compare it to the average jew

>>23315760
Every group is nepotistic. You won't get anywhere in life without knowing people. Europe is way more nepotistic than the US, even. If you live here you would see how stupid you sound. You think Jews in the US are nepotistic. You should experience living in Germany where even getting a middling managerial position is only possible when you part of the old boys clubs.
And the story is no different in the surrounding countries.

>>23315774
>average
We are talking about people not bananas.
People should be treated as individuals.
Everything else is unjust.

If you want to claim some kind of moral superiority over other people you have to behave justly, yourself.

For that matter I wouldn't find much in common or much to applaud in the average of any group. I don't like my own people let alone foreigners.

>>23315775
see the difference is that with europeans it's the rich boys club that gets nepotism, with jews it's ethnic
since we have already accepted that capitalism is just how we have to live we have accepted the old money clubs and the classism, you put ethnic / religious shit on top of that and you will gather resentment and distrust of that in group
same thing as nearly every 1% being blamed for the actions that benefit that group so too you will get blamed for decisions and actions that benefit your in group
kind of like whites are blamed for white privilege except that this time it's real, you goofed up on turning a already accepted formula into one where there isn't even a veil of bullshit that tries to convince you that you too can be part of that in group
>just snip your dick and become a jew too
no thanks

>>23315778
>lets just treat everyone on individual basis
if you're a walking stereotype expect to be treated as one

>>23315780
>see the difference is that with europeans it's the rich boys club that gets nepotism, with jews it's ethnic

That's nonsense. Privilege exists, but it's intersectional and hard to calculate like that.

>>23315783
Who are you talking about, exactly?

>>23315790
go to /pol/ if you want to look at graphs
>>23315794
if you behave like a walking negative stereotype no amount of individual case judging is going to make it any different for you

>>23315796
Sounds like you're desperate for reasons to hate on random people and blame them for your shitty life.
Your reasoning is devoid of any virtue. You care neither about justice nor morality. You seem motivated by anger and hate. You probably just get a thrill out of having a target group to hate upon.

>>23315840
took you half an hour to come up with that dismissal without substance?

I'm surprised by how retarded the universe is. It can't put one decent woman into my life. Not one. Who/whatever is responsible for this deserves all the loneliness I experience. Who forgot to put kindness and a fear of god into the laws of nature? I can't help but assume this is hell.

>>23315844
What is there to dismiss?
You have no coherent argument.

>>23315845
Funny how that works. Some of us have zero social opportunities and others have an abundance of them.
I believe the only way to fix that is through radical change. Whatever you are doing, stop and do something else.

>>23315848
>it's not easy to calculate that
>even /pol/ can do it, go there to read up about it

>people are individuals so they should be judged as such
>they are when they behave like walking negative stereotypes

i addressed the points, you projected that i'm a person devoid of virtue, that i do not care about justice nor morality, that my motivation is anger and hate and that i get a thrill out of hating a target group
but i am not surprised because you have been behaving like a walking negative stereotype this entire time, you project your own perceived flaws that you do not even consider as something desirable onto me (morality etc), you keep moving the goal post not giving a shit about any of the points i make and you're generally just being a weasel
i would say you would fit right in with them
>>23315845
have you considered that "decent women" don't want just any joe off the street?

>>23315845
>Who/whatever is responsible for this deserves all the loneliness I experience.
It's you, you're the one responsible for this, there is no one to blame but yourself.

>>23315858
now say that to the ugliest cripple on the world

>>23315857
wait, hold on, who do you think I am, lol

>>23315861
It would still hold true. You cannot change others. You can only change yourself.

So if you're a typical incel, you have to change yourself and figure out how to make it work.
And if you have a face that only a mother can love, then you have to learn to accept that and let go of your desires.

>>23315862
couldn't care less who you are, i addressed the people that replied to me, if you want to jump in and catch collateral and then act surprised that you got mistaken for some of the earlier replies that's on you
>>23315865
>if you're ugly just die alone
either that or become rich

>>23315861
There are ugly cripples who get snizz, this is in every sense, your fault.

>>23315866
You clearly implied I was Jewish, I'm sorry to disappoint you. Your jewdar is way off.

>>23315868
you should check their bank account, women care about wealth and status in men, men care about looks in women (in general)
>>23315873
could have fooled me, you'd fit right in with the walking negative stereotype

>>23315874
>you should check their bank accoun
You're coping instead of fixing yourself, it's never your fault, there's always something in your way, there's even a reason why even ugly cripples on welfare can get snizz but you can't, it's impossible for you to take on responsibility, you're pathetic, this is why you will never get the woman you wants, it's always excuses and cope with you.

>>23315879
>he assumes i have issues with puss puss
lol, lmao even

>>23315884
You're not fooling anyone.

>>23315886
anon it really isn't much of an achievement unless you're short or ugly as sin

Is it gay to masturbate? After all it's a man's hand touching a man's penis

yeah probably, you should stop doing it

>>23315884
Why are you looking for a decent woman if you can't even be a decent man? No woman wants a used-up man, it's gross.

>>23315896
>why are you looking for a
why would i look for one?

>>23315898
Cause god knows they're not gonna come to you, that's pretty evident from the way you bitched and moaned in your first reply.

also women don't give a single shit about how many pussies you've plowed through as long as you don't have std's, you will always have more market value than a virgin man anyway because they're all sluts
>>23315899
>you can't get a decent women
wouldn't know, i've only looked for the obvious sluts that you can pump and dump in a one night stand

>>23315905
>also women don't give a single shit about how many pussies you've plowed through as long as you don't have std's,
wrong
>you will always have more market value than a virgin man anyway
wrong
>because they're all sluts
wrong

>>23315852
No matter what I do, offline or online, I just don't seem to meet anyone, especially my age, who I'm attracted to and who also just happens to (fall in) love with me. Who fully reciprocates my love, dare I even fantasize: approach me or make any other real effort at all, compared to my own.

If 15 years of living with this painful desire while not being a complete shutin does not result in ANY love, then something is wrong. In retrospect, the only thing I'm thankful for is having ultimately avoided many shitty people. Golden rule violators; hypocrites, liars, assholes, selfish people. In the meanwhile, I have become jaded, bitter, distant and sensitively critical (critically sensitive?). I deserve so much more than this.

So I'm waiting for the universe to show me the wait was still worth it, because what could make it worth it is beyond my imagination, and because death seemed like a good option a few times already, and I'm out of energy soon again.

>>23315905
>wouldn't know
You clearly would since that what you bitched and moaned about.

>>23315905
Bruised banana cock is what you have.
Fucking sluts is nothing to be proud of.

>>23315858
Do I control the entirety of the universe? Do I actually have control over the free will or unconscious desires of others? That would be new to me. In that case, I accept full responsibility for my fate.

>>23315907
>nuh-uh
experienced is experience
>>23315909
>i'm now taking this personally and clinging to it
have fun with that
>>23315911
christmas cakes shouldn't talk, men are expected to know what they're doing, women can just lay on their back and the less sex they've had prior the better
>fucking sluts is nothing to be proud of
hey i didn't choose the market, if all that's on it is beans then boy you're eating beans

>>23315918
>hey i didn't choose the market
Admitting you can't actually land someone decent, so you go for the easy mcdonalds slop.
Very telling!

>>23315919
>there's actually loads of decent women out there, you just can't have em
decent women don't cheat on their husbands and decent women go fast, it is what it is not my fault 90% of them are just used up sluts, also
>slop
jewess no jewing, you're not decent women you're harpies

>>23315918
you sound very lower class

>>23315923
no shit, statistically very likely isn't it

>>23315908
the universe won't do shit, you need to do something different than your usual routine

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>>23315925
>i have a routine

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>>23314204

I tried reading while taking a dump. Wasn't that great.

Housing market is beyond fucked where I live. Not even that it's too expensive, there's just nothing on the market, nothing for sale.
Not my problem now however, I already had an offer accepted for the last home on the market.

I’m a citymade jazztime surfer
All the lights are neon forever
I know cars
I know concrete
Every love becomes liminal
Every crosswalk a river
This city of insomniacs
Dreams an endless night

>>23315265
Yes

>>23315334
with the right drugs, anything is possible

>>23315260
26 is relatively late in life to learn to draw, but it’s not too late. Van Gogh famously went to art school when he was 28. So if this is something you really want, my advice is to enroll in an academy ASAP but make sure it’s what you really want. At 26, you’re pretty much at the best age to just get started at pretty much anything. Whatever you want your legacy to be, you can choose to go pursue it now. But you have to choose now, because you want to ideally be walking that path by about 30. If you’re on the path by 28-32 you’ve made good progress.

If I could do things over I would do them differently.

>>23315260
Lurk /ic/ nigga

>>23315991
You wasted life why wouldn't you waste the afterlife?

>>23315845
Lulz. Let's just say that the universe has absurd proportions. (see also Lucretius, etc.) As for decent women, good luck.

>>23316009
I didn’t waste life. I just didn’t move at the pace I should have.

>>23315375
>increasing birbs
^_^

>>23315446
Richard Swallow?

I eschewed a pretty high paying job to become a public servant and now I’m realizing that my public servant career is a total dead end. I never thought I’d care much about it, but I do now that I’m older. When you’re at the age where you want to do things, marry, have children, these things start to bother you and life’s not just about some anti-materialist philosophy.

>>23316109
you mean you don't have enough clout to rise further than one of the grunts

>>23314204
Yesterday I watched a documentary about India, and wondered how it is that cholera doesn't take a massive death toll every year. What exactly is the science of such toilet cities?

Reddit is now hating on Ivy League students because how dare these privileged assholes protest a genocide. They should just behave like the evil caricatures that we envision them to be.

What a sad world we live in.

So whatever humiliates entertains us?

>>23316111
It doesn’t really work like that in public service. Everyone works for politicians and their appointees, so if you’re not a politician or appointee, which you won’t be as a career civil servant, then the highest you can rise is manager of your little department, middle manager basically.

>>23316121
Why are you on reddit?

>>23316121
Pretty much everyone hates Ivy League students now and that’s unironically a good thing for rescuing higher education. The Ivies are thoroughly liberal-progressive (and bourgeois) institutions and they need to go before anything can get better.

>>23316137
dude I know how public service works, you clearly are incapable of networking

>>23316138
What's there to check beyond Reddit and 4chan?
I don't do social media so Reddit is my only alternative website.

>>23316140
Hating people for belonging to a group is the epitome of identity politics.
You are indulging in the game you claim to hate so much.

>>23316141
I don’t think you do know how it works. I think you are full of shit.

>>23316143
Reddit and 4chan are social media.

>>23316143
I don’t hate people. I hate the institution, and where that institutions branded on people like cattle, as it is with Ivy League students, they should be chastised for that. This is the cold hard reality of institutions that have been politicized like this. We live in a world where even your race and sex is politicized. So you can either get with the program or be destroyed (politically).

> turn 31
> realize I didn’t do from 22-30 what I should have done and time is running out
> feel defeated

>>23316161
You're on a clock anon. No time to waste, get to work!!!!!

>>23316161
And what was it you should have done?

>>23316168
Bitches and gentlemen
It‘s show time
Hurry hurry
Step right up

>>23316151
>We live in a world where even your race and sex is politicized.
We do? That's news to me.

>>23315155
there's one acceptable use of violence.

>>23316169
Well for starters I should have tried harder in college and graduated on time with a better degree.

>>23316173
You should come out from under your rock sometime.

this place seems to be mostly failed normies or angsty dudes who can only vent here
am i the only one who's actually kinda nuts?

>>23316208
This is the most mentally stable and adult general on 4chan as far as I am aware.
There are like another hundred generals over this website. Some of there are really nutty.
I suggest the ones on >>>/r9k/ and >>>/pol/.

>>23316208
Try /x/.

>>23316208
idk how long did you spend institutionalised as a child?

>>23316239
That is not how this works because the most unhinged kids are the ones that fell trough the cracks of the system because of their crazy parents.

>>23316248
>No not the kind of crazy where it's an obvious medical event
so you weren't arrested either? how about school exclusion? any missing limbs?

>>23316169
I should have tried to publish earlier. Years ago, I got the advice here that I shouldn’t bother trying to publish until I was in my 30s at least. At the time, it was a sound argument so it seemed good advice. In retrospect, I think it was well-reasoned mostly but flawed. I’ve spent the last year trying to get published realized that it would be a lot easier if I had some minor publishing victories from years back. Even just publishing in your college magazine can be huge for getting a look later on.


>>23316208
To be clear, you’re surprised that some space isn’t filled mostly with literally insane people, who are in the minority basically everywhere? Yep, you’re nuts alright. But no really, this thread is mostly people venting and chatting. That’s what anonymous discussion turns into, especially for men. You divulge the thing a you would never say out loud to someone.

>>23316256
>>23316259
He just wants to believe he's a special kind of crazy. It's like the kids who want to believe they're a special fan of something so everyone else having a larger and more dedicated collection are just faking rather than putting in more time or effort.

>>23316256
I am not that anon. I was never arrested, excluded or amputated. But my mom is a childrens psychiatrist in a mental hospital, so i hear some stories.

>>23316239
Something snapped inside and now I can only feel emotions when I look at myself in the mirror. So I wake up and stare at my face, I put a mirror next to my desk and constantly look into it. Sometimes I look good, sometimes I look bad, but either way this is how I get energy to do creative things. It feels similar to what Mishima had.

>>23316270
>It feels similar to what Mishima had.
it is called killing your own soul trough years of being a coomer.

>>23316283
Nah. I also find sex gross. Any kind of penetration is disgusting

>>23316284
Based

>>23314204
I keep feeling like we're all innately parasites because of my interactions with someone. No matter what I said to them, their actions or what they said wouldn't change. You could be suffering and it wouldn't change anything. They just put themselves first in each and every single case. If you type too much, you're labelled "emotional" or "mentally ill". "That's crazy". I fucking hate that I have some emotional attachment to someone who just ignores you out of name of their "freedom" and that could be days or weeks. Someone who messages you last minute when you're conveniently asleep. You can't win. EVER. Someone who just calls themselves an "independent person" just to have no guilt about doing whatever they want at any given moment. We end of doing whatever we want and then reasoning it afterwards. Someone who asks you "are you ok?" so you feel accepted followed by "that's ok, to act without thinking." Or to want to be listened to just to have "evidence shows otherwise" thrown at you. This person had issues with putting others down, sadistic faggot. They are a literal website developer. Maybe that's where this dweeb's power issues come from. "Is it terminal?" "Lmao that's humiliating, I'll just act like you are no one to me" This faggot didn't believe in apologizing because "it makes him feel bad just so others can feel good". Someone who doesn't try to understand you ever, or just puts on the appearance that they are, just shuts you down whenever you try to speak then says afterwards "now you are not listening to me". Answers your questions with questions or just flat out ignores them. Attachments are fucked, I still have one to that person and it won't go away. The worst thing is going back to them and trying to convince yourself you are wrong about what you say about them, or just feeling like they are acting like that because of something you did. And your brains remembers the good feelings from them so you want to go back. The thing is, they are not always bad. AHHH please mind shut up not again. It's really annoying. YOU CANT EVER WIN. RANT OVER.

does anyone know of a book similar to sandberg's german for reading, for russian? ie a textbook focused on what's needed to read the language, grammar and common constructions mostly. preferably not for total beginners as i have some prior knowledge.

>>23316222
>This is the most mentally stable and adult general on 4chan as far as I am aware.
You really think so? I think this is one of the least mentally stable generals on 4chan. Even the /bar/ threads on /fit/ were more stable, which is really saying something.

>>23316148
He doesn't, and you're right. I was a social worker for 4 years, and it's true that working in public policy/politics is dead end. Only hope is leveraging your public service experience into a private sector career.

>>23314204
New:
>>23316351

>>23316351

>>23316351

>>23316347
Actually, what’s sad is that the skills and experience is very transferable to academic administration in universities and the like, but that too is a dead end without a doctorate and faculty experience. Let’s not even go into that the most obvious thing to do as a civil servant is become a politician, but that is literally illegal. It’s okay to insider trading and sit on the board of PE firms supplying arms to the Ukrainian army before you get appointed as Secretary of State but if tou’re an accountant for the state and you want to become the treasurer because you know the ins and outs of what’s good for your state’s finances, you’re fucked. And it’s not exactly like industry employees are really excited to take on “lazy” public servants. So you’re screwed no matter what you do. Huge mistake entering this career.

>>23316208
Where's the transgression in that?