I feed him and this is how he thanks me. Why don't they pay taxes? Why doesn't he need an ID? Why can't he be represented at all? He can just go on my property anytime he wants? That's how this fucking works?
Sovereign citizen.
Ive never soon a squirrel piss
>>534270651Just let em chill bro
>>534270651He's a nutmaxxed pisscel and you will put respect on his name.
>>534270651you should kick his assmaybe shoot him with a BB
>>534270651My squirrelbro never pisses on my balcony. He just leaves a pile of peanut shells on the railing that I need to sweep away every few days. Im hoping this summer I'll have the time to condition him to take peanuts from my hand.
Who does he think he is? Noon on a weekday, just laying around.
>>534270882>nutmaxxed pisscelkek>>534270748>>534271106in truth, he/she pisses occasionally. but it is frequent enough to notice, there are piss blotches. it's actually more infrequent in reality. im sure he pisses responsibly on the trees>>534271237NO NUTS? NO WORK.NO WORK? NO TAXES.
>>534270651Have you considered bashing its head in with a shovel?
>>534271341the only heads I bash are nigger skulls
I also found one in my shoe one time and let him live in my house for a few monthsNow squirrels are everywhere because he fucked so many and brought his gfs around for food
>>534270651https://mdc.mo.gov/magazines/conservationist/1999-11/squirrel-cuisine
>>534270651You are his shabbos goy, and he is marking you as his territory.Shut up and give him cashews.
>>534271552cute lil fella, he grew up to be a lady's man
>>534271741so you're saying I'm supposed to pay HIM rent??
>>534271494https://mdc.mo.gov/discover-nature/recipes/squirrel/squirrel-country-sausage
>>534270651It's marking territory to keep rival squirrels from getting at his easy feeding. It's not a sign of disrespect, it's keeping other twiggers out of his turf.
>>534270651my squirrel friend eats out of my hand. she also pisses in my mouth
>>534271778>.govgrim>>534271802>twiggerskekked
>>534271642Saw 'conservationist' and thought this was going to be about making 'cuisine' for feeders, not how to bbq squirrels. I love the little tree rats but never will I eat one.
>>534270651Squirrels keep moving into my garage and making it smell like piss.
>>534271744he used to climb all over me and scratch the fuck out of my head and even other skittish ones were more comfortable with me he brought aroundKinda sad in October he was sluggish and he had hair falling off him in chunks so he wasnt long for this world and he just simply disappeared one day and now the greys hang aroundthat do be life though
>>534270651He's pissing on your porch to tell lesser rodents to stay the fuck away because he's Bigdog and the human feeds HIM not those faggy little chipmunks and mice/rats/moles.Be thankful and remember you would do the same.
>>534271834I call them tree niggers.
>>534271989>scratch the fuck out of my headbased>sluggish and he had hair falling off him in chunks so he wasnt long for this world>he just simply disappeared one day>that do be life thoughindeed, but he got to live; you had a part in that; you were basically his cross-species father and he was your adopted tree rat; it does not make you a cuck either.he's fucking infinite squirrel pussy in heaven I imagine, living in the ethereal world as he lived here.>>534272008yeah I piss like that too.
>>534270651I used to have a big male cat that decapitated squirrels, before he passed away.
>>534271883>not how to bbq squirrelsLMFAO
>>534270703oxymoron
>>534271494>the only heads I bash are nigger skullsIsn't that illegal?
>>534272816Not if you're a nigger.
>>534270651I'm mad...and that's a factI found out...animals don't helpAnimal think...they're pretty smartShit on the ground...see in the dark.They wander around like a crazy dogMake a mistake in the parking lotAlways bumping into thingsAlways let you down down down down.Animals think they understandTrust in them a big mistakeAnimals want to change my lifeI will ignore animals adviceThey're never there when you need themThey never come when you call themThey're never there when you need themThe never come when you call them down down down down.I know the animals...are laughing at usThey don't even know...what a joke isI won't follow...animal's adviceI don't care...if they're laughing at us.They're never there when you need themThey never come when you call themThey're never there when you need themThe never come when you call them down down down down.They say they don't need moneyThey're living on nuts and berriesThey say animals don't worryYou know animals are hairy?They think they know what's bestThey're making a fool of usThey ought to be more carefulThey're setting a bad exampleThey have untroubled livesThey think everything's niceThey like to laugh at peopleThey're setting a bad example(go ahead) laugh at me.
Trap him with sunflower seeds and peanut butter, then put the trap in a plastic bag and wrap it around your exhaust pipe.Fucking tree rats are niggers.
>>534270855>filenameIm paranoid too and its nice to see others like me
>>534270651He is pissing on your porch to make sure he is the only one going to receive your affection and food.
>>534273314Why is your kind so moronic?
>>534275252so it seems, so it seems.>>534275471we dont claim that nigger
How do we deal with the squirrel question, /pol/?
>>534270651i love squirrels they are cute :3
>>534273014same as it ever was
>>534270651Tenerite tipped pellet rifle ammoRip & Tear anon
>>534275588Squirrels are great. They act as alarms and also keep some order among other wildlife. If they get overpopulated, you can just plink them with a .22 or air rifle. I have 4-5 of them around my yard and they never cause trouble, besides planting acorns too close to the house that become oaks I have to pull up.
>>534270651The squirrel has been marking your home as part of his territory to keep other male squirrels away and lure in female squirrels. Pissocratic land delineation is inevitable, in the absence of humegroid kleptolegalism.
>>534275530Must be an immigrant. Usually the case when thats the behaviour I encounter
>>534270651Just fill a bucket half full of water and float the top with bird seed. Boom you have a bucket of dead squirrels and chipmunks you can dump in the lake. That's what I do
>>534277727>pet squirrel Lucky. I love squirrels but me jack russel chases them but me cat is alright with them. Tell u wot tho, I once fed a crow whilst walking the dog and it's got to the point now where about 8 crows follow me around.
>>534270651My clothes dryer broke 1 month ago so I line dry them outside now and a squirrel pisses on 1/3rd of the clothes every time requiring me to rewash because their piss smells very bad.
