How are you holding up today, anon? I went to my community meetings and met with friends, but afterwards I went through a brief wave of depression. It made me realize I might be neurodivergent since I always seem to stand out among normies. But that shouldn't stop me or anyone from taking part in society. In fact, I believe that those of us who have experienced deep suffering often have the greatest capacity to help others who are struggling too. Please feel free to talk about your state of mind in this thread. If you woke up and decided to live another day it means you're strong and you should keep going. Please don't hate yourself, you are valuable. Remember that your suffering is also temporary, good times will come if you keep living on. You just need to keep trying, okay? I love you anon, you are loved.
>>82584215>In fact, I believe that those of us who have experienced deep suffering often have the greatest capacity to help others who are struggling too.No, I suffered so they should too. Only people who have also suffered the same as me will ever get any help or sympathy from me.
>>82584229Everyone is suffering every day of their lives
I have lots of resentment towards myself thanks to how badly I treated people in my past, thanks to how I self sabotaged myself in lots of different ways - and still do, and thanks to the fact I am an avoidant lazy bastard that knows how he can fix his some of his problems but would rather procrastinate or waste his time rather than fixing his shit.
>>82584215>How are you holding up today, anon?i was doing good when i woke up but now i really really want to cry and i can't. thanks for the nice thread though.
>>82584296It's okay anon, now that you're aware of your errors you can avoid them. You don't have to rush things, take your time and work your way out one step at a time. As long as you don't give up you'll be fine.>>82584307>now i really really want to cry and i can'tIf it makes you feel better go ahead and cry, don't keep it bottled up anon
>>82584352>It's okay anon, now that you're aware of your errors you can avoid themI've been aware of my errors for a long time. Either I didn't accept it until recently, or I did and I'm an even bigger idiot than I realize.Do you want to know something? Somebody I know IRL "stole" a potential girlfriend from me and that happened EXCLUSIVELY because I mentioned her to him after she left the place we were working at. Had I kept my mouth shut I would very likely be with her right now. This is just an example of my extreme idiocy. I can tell you more examples if you want me to.
>>82584215>How are you holding up today, anon? horny....*very* horny...
>>82584352im trying, but nothing comes out. i dont know why. i feel like shit but i guess not bad enough for me to be able to cry.
>>82584407>I've been aware of my errors for a long time. Either I didn't accept it until recently, or I did and I'm an even bigger idiot than I realize.It takes time to find the way out, but eventually you'll make it. Just don't stop trying.>Somebody I know IRL "stole" a potential girlfriend from meTough luck, she's missing out on you. Don't let this bring you down, emotional independence is a very attractive trait to girls. You shouldn't include women in the formula of your happiness, if you learn to be happy alone you will become invincible.>>82584426Listen to nice music <4>>82584442Then don't worry about it, I'm going to chant the daimoku to loosen my mind a bit
>>82584472>Just don't stop trying.Always.>Tough luck, she's missing out on you. Don't let this bring you down, emotional independence is a very attractive trait to girls. You shouldn't include women in the formula of your happiness, if you learn to be happy alone you will become invincible.Whoever she is with is better than me at every possible metric that I am aware of. She does miss me, that I am sure of since I talk with her once in a while. And that wasn't the whole story: I talked shit behind her back before she got with him. That's another horrible part of my character I have to work on.As for happiness, I can be happy even when completely alone, it's just that the sentiment is fleeting and doesn't last for longer than a couple of days at most.Thank you for your time.
>>82584578I talked shit about my ex gf too after our break up, but I have to thank her for bringing me on the right path. I met new people because I was craving human contact, I turned that anger into love and compassion. This is how we should all live. Now it's your turn to decide how to channel that energy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vznl-mUrNIs&list=RDvznl-mUrNIs&start_radio=1&pp=ygUQYWZ0ZXJtYXRoIHRyaWNreaAHAQ%3D%3D
>>82584591In my case I talked shit behind her back before I even went on the first date with her. We've been in two in total, and in both of them it was her that asked me out, whenever I asked her out myself she'd bail on me.And me talking shit behind people's backs happens often. It's one of my personality traits I despise the most. I even talked behind the back of an amazing girl I know from here, months after I basically abandoned her.I'll channel the anger in motivation for loving myself and losing the aspects of my personality that I absolutely hate. I'm going to sleep. See you again, hopefully.
>>82584635I'll be here tomorrow, have a good one anon <4
>>82584215the only reason i wake up and am still living is cause i havent gotten my affairs in order yet. i want to write a will and save up some money and do some other stuff first. need to find the most painless way to go as well. write a note. whateverim not strong, or valuable, or whatever. i contribute nothing to society. im a disabled neet who cant do anything useful. the only thing i look forward to in life is being able to die. i used to wanna be a wife, but i dont give a fuck about that anymore
>>82584767>im a disabled neet who cant do anything usefulIf you let your disability define your whole identity you won't make it. As I told the other anon, you have to find the golden nugget in your shortcomings to succeed in life. Plenty of disabled men have stable relationships and a sex life, if you're fun and (possibly) in shape your disability won't be a setback. This might sound brutal but it's true, as a disabled man you are more likely to find a woman than vice-versa because our patriarchal society doesn't teach men to be nurturing.
>>82584803im a disabled woman...so that means it is over
>>82584830No it's not, even though men are statistically less likely to be caretakers for disabled partners that doesn't mean all men are. I've been in a toxic relationship with a girl once and I would take a kind disabled gf over her.
>>82584307I'm sorry to hear you're not doing well, Anon. But remember, you've had a few days in a row where you felt okay, so what you're experiencing now isn't your only reality, and you'll get to feel better again at some point! Just gotta suffer through it for now. I'll be cheering you on in my thoughts!
>>82584215i am dying to finally move out of my parents' house but i probably have a bad credit score and i don't make a whole lot of money. it hurts so bad to feel so stuck yet also aware of the fact that there are indeed solutions, i just can't find them or for whatever reason i can't act on them when i do. it makes me want to rip my face off to think of the life and independence im constantly squandering
>>82584944I am in a similar situation right now and I'm dying to start teaching and move out. Unfortunately it seems like karma's stacked against me so I will have to wait until either a school moves on with the bureaucracy or I find something better. I'm searching every day, sending applications to hundreds of schools and praying that I'll get to work by the end of october.
>>82584767>i used to wanna be a wife, but i dont give a fuck about that anymoreThis is because you've stopped seeing your value. This Anon is right >>82584803 if you let your suffering take over your personality it just makes you a bitter and hateful person. In that state it becomes impossible to see your own value, ever find any happiness, amplifies the pain and disability, and causes you to be cruel towards and drive away anyone who'd love you as you are.
Alright anons see you tomorrow, I'm leaving my socials if you want to chitchat <4X: https://x.com/Jofukyo?t=814mnwwYyZ1JIHvYP5v78A&s=09Discord:neverdisparagingThank you everybody, I love you <4
>>82584707I was only going for a nap
