This is a rant post about myself since i saw a thread talking about people discussing their rape stories (fucking disgusting desu cuz their bragging about raping people).Either way i wanted to talk aabout hopw i got raped and how it has affected me to this point in my life.So when i was about 11 or 12 i was really close with one of my cousins (hispanic faily) he was a little older at the time he was about 15. We were chilling in his room at a family party when suddenly he started talking about how he got head from this girl a few weeks ago. Me being a dumb 12 year old looking for approval i said that i had gotten head as well (me lying my ass off) he was shocked but then asked me more questions about it and i just kept ying. Im pretty sure heknew that i was lying but that didnt matter, after about 15 mins of grilling me trying to get the full story he eventually said that it prob didnt feel as good as when he got head. Me again being dumb said that it "TOTALLY" felt better. And he was asking me how she did it and other stuff abt the specifics about it. Either way he eventually said "if she was so good show me how she did it" and pulled out a hairbrush from his dresser. and so like he said i started slow but my first time doing it i kinda sucked but i kept sucking it (i dont know why i did this but i felt like i had to at this point idk why but i just did whatever he said). either way as i was sucking it went too deep and i started coughing and for some reason he told me to go into his closet (it was a walk in). and he didnt even say anything just put me on my knees and pulled it out. And again at that point i felt as though i didnt know what to do and i just complied. I started slow but he made me go faster by pushing down my head down. it was only 5-10 mins but he ended up busting in my mouth and i spit it out ( he also bruised the back of my mouth). -Its so long that i have to make it multiply parts lmao
>82947511cute bondage pic
>>82947511I didnt really talk for the rest of the night. but it was a few months until i saw him next and then this is when it got really bad because he talked to me in private and basically blackmailed me. He said that if i didnt do what he said he would tell everyone else about it and i knew that would be bad, so everytime i saw him i would give hime head. then it got more extreme, he would finger me so roughly to the point i would bleed out. and the blackmail would just keep building up everytime we did something new, so i was stuck. But it all came to a climax when after about a year and a half since it started he wanted to have actual sex. I went over to his house after school one day and it was rough, he went at me for about 45 mins. i was in so much pain, my ass wasnt the same for a while after that. the pain and bleeding was so bad that it got infected because the wounds were so huge in there. I lied to my parents telling them that i did it to myself. But after that i saw him maybe once or twice before he moved far away. Havent spoken to him since.But that was just the tip of the iceburg, because people always assume that when you get raped you just go back to normal afterwards. But you dont. After that i became hypersexual, i would consider myself pretty attractive desu but i could never get emotinally connected to any girlfreinds that i had. I have also gotten myself an awful porn addiction at this point, especially for femboy and futa. I ended up dressing up as a femboy and becoming an actual femboy, althoug hi ralrly dressed fem outside. ( i still dress as a femboy i might be trans idk)Sorry another part lmao please be patient
>>82947511>>82947558didn't read but have you considered posting on /r/rapekink? they'll definitely read it there.
Show us how you dress little fagboi
>>82947558 For some reason i kept up with being gay even though everytime i would do anything like that i would cry afterwards. In my jr year of highschool i downloaded grindr for some reason. met up with different men, would basically hoe myself out to different men. And do whatever they wanted to me, i would follow orders and never complain. would do crazy shit like staying at a guys house for a week as a maid, would stay plugged 24/7 and he would just fuck me when he got home from work endlessly. I would cook and clean for him as well (did stuff like this alot just for attention). I would post nudes of myself online begging for attention or reddit, became a femboy and would jsut follow orders when proplr would give them to me. humilliate myself on the internet for nothing. Even on here i would tell people to send me pics of poses they would want me to do and i would jsut post it to the public for everyone to see. i have permenently scarred myself and i just know those pics of me are still on the internet out there, spreading myself wide open for the world to see (if you have used r9k activily over the past like year you have definently seen my nudes). But my crave for attention is just constant, its awful and i hate myself and i dont know why i do it/did it. I even eded up going to glory holes and just abusing my body for hours. I would go to dive bars so much that the ownders started recognizing me and knew what i was doing, they didnt kick me out or nothing but it was still emberessing. I have been getting better but im still not good, sometmes i go back to my old ways and just post nudes of myself online for no real reason other than the fact i like it when people fawn over me. Im dissapointed in myselfThank you for reading all this. i know and it does not have a point really but i still thank you for reading it all. I just wanted to shar my experince.
cute story. What's the most extreme thing you've done?
>>82947582Hi, thank you but i feel like they would glorify it more and use it to get off rather than actually listen to what im saying and how it has affected my life
>>82947599No thanks, i trying not to relapse into humilation posting. cuz usually when i start i cant stop.
>>82947602this genuinely fucking sucks, not even sure what to say, you deserved better anon, i'm sorry that you went through that, are you in therapy or have you considered something like it?
>>82947617Went on a 6 day sex bender at 16 (as you can assume my parnets dont give a fuck about me)talked with this guy on grindr about having a gangbang, him and 4 of his freinds were down. after school i took an uber to his house and told my parents i was staying at a freinds. I brought lube, sex toys, butt plugs, and tons of different fem outfits and sex clothes. smoked a huge blunt with 2 of the dudes than the other 3 arrived we did our thing and i was really high so it helped. I didnt really like it tho (obiviously who would like it getting fucked by 5 dudes) and after that i was gonna go home but then they said they had acid, I decide why not and took some but that would be a mistake. That started the next 5 days of just doing drugs and drinking. To be honest i dont remember much other than a few key details. I was constiantly being fucked and when i wasnt i was either plugged or sucking someones dick. I ended up going to a strip club with them ( i dont remember how i got in) and i ended up being basically raped in the bathroom by 2 dudes (not part of the group) then i remember i was basically my groups stripper that they would parade around in a g string, cage, a microskirt, plug, and tight latex. they would have me walk around with them as they grabbed my ass consitantly or sick their tounges down my throught. And i would just keep pumping my body full of drugs. It was just a cycle of going ot a club or bar, getting fucked/raped doing drugs and being barley concious. After the week i went home and my parnets never asked how i was.
>>82947602it's just 3 paragraphs there's no need to thank me
>>82947660My freind is a phyce major and is helping me on the side. Im too broke to do therepy especially cuz my parents kicked my out at 17
>>82947689Jesus anon what the fuck? how are you mentally?
>>82947602>i downloaded grindr>for some reason-_-
>>82947700Thank you anon, idk i just needed somewhere to vent.
>>82947701Dude i'm not even trying to be rude but your life sounds like a living hell, and damn i've been through some bad stuff so that's saying something, i genuinely want to help you but i'm also broke and likely not even from your country
This thread was the most disgusting thing I have read on this site.
>>82947711Some days better than others. I try my best to do good. deleted all dating app and stuff off my phone but sometimes i slip into my old habits and i post myself online or i sleep with someone i barley know. i hate myself fo it but im getting better. 2 steps forward 1 step back yk
>>82947725yea im from gainesvill florida USA. And broke too. And its fine, im doing wayy better than howi was from like 14-18. But still thanks for your support anon
>>82947734In like a good way or bad way. Like i should have never shared, or its disgusting what happened too me?
>>82947755I guess both, I'm still trying to process what the fuck did I just read.
average day in floriday
>>82947745do you need a friend or something? it's all i can offer but like, honestly dude, you're a warrior and you deserve a lot better
>>82947767Sorry, yea my life is kinda shitty im ngl. But i hope this could give some persepctive in someway shape or form. idk lmao
>>82947768youd be suprised how noemal it is. I have met tons of people who have similar stories to me. And also the people dont care. They know its happeneing and still do it. The world is fucked
>>82947774Im good, thanks for offerring. I know it sounds insane but im 20 rn, so i have had some time to process everything. It sounds extra bad cuz im just laying it all out there but my life hasent been all bad. i have truly met some great people in my life and im thankful for each and every person who has helped me through life. Even when it seems like no one is there for you, there is still good in the world and people aroun you to help, you just need to reach out and ask.
>>82947816I'm glad you're doing better, your parents seem awful if you don't mind me pointing it out
>>82947828No they are, abusive drug addicts yk. but its not the end of the world. Im happy they kicked me out actually. It was truly my first steps into getting better.
>>82947621you don't think the same thing is gonna happen here? seems like a strange assumption.
>>82947836Well idk, i use 4chan a bit so i hoped and it seems i was actually pretty right. everyone is being nice yk.
>>82947831if you don't mind me asking, are you into girls now or are men just your cup?
>>82947848Both, i ahve had sex with may more men then girls but i have also been raped by a few women as well. But i like both, I have had about 6 girlfreinds and like 4 boyfreinds and i would say i find women alot more attractive then men
>>82947873I'm sorry but i snorted a little on the raped by a few women thing, thought that didn't happen at all and was just some thing robots posted here as a fetish. i really hope you find a cute gf or bf soon that gets you anon, you deserve happiness okay? i belive in you, you got this
>>82947884Yea i thought the same thing. My first time i was raped by a women i was 15, doing my "normal" thing iwhere i was allowed into a bar by the bouncer or someone who knew the bouncer and i ended up going iside with a dude. after i blew him in the bathroom he left me so while i was alone i was just in a corner until a women in her late 30s to 40s approached me. gave off milf energy but not too attractive. she asked me if i wanted a drink i said sure so i took it and she had spiked it with something. because after only 1 drink i remember feeling REALLY drunk. she took me back to her place and what kinda snapped me out a daze was this awful pain i felt in my ass. before i had even realized it i was in doggy as she was fingering me. she kept going digging her nails into my insides and i kept my screams in but told her to stop. she never did. she then got on top of me and rode me, what people dont understand about rape (especially men) is that even tho it physically feels good your in mental torture during it. she kept riding me yelling about how good i felt as i had basically accepted my fate and had dissasociated. i went soft (obviously) and she got so mad she started punching and slapping me and pulling my hair. i fought back a little but i was so out of it she was still stronger than me. she ended up eating me out until i came then forced me to lick up my cum off the sheets as she wipped me.to most of you it sounds hot, and i would usually agree as i love dominant women, but the part that makes it awful instead of hot. is that when you dont concent to something you dont find it hot/attractive which i think alot of people misundersand when it comes to rape. if i had wanted to get whipped and beat (which i have before and it is REALLY HOT) i would have loved it. But since i didnt wanna be there it was more like a dad or beating their kid.
>>82947973>to most of you it sounds hotbro it sounds like fucking torture, i'm sorry that happened, i guess some people here would like that to happen to them? i know i fucking wouldn't, really can't understand what goes through the mind of a rapist, it's bizarre that some people can just do that and go with their life normally
>>82947990You would be suprised how many people i have met that havce said shit like "if i were you i would have really enjoyed it" or liek "You SOOOOOOOOO lucky" like bruh my ass has scars inside of it from how used i was
>>82948000That's actually crazy and somethind i'd expect to read into a doujin or something, didn't even know that was possible, most people that say that haven't been in shitty situations
>>82948023Exactly, but that wont stop people. they always assume some sex is great no matter how you get it.
>>82947511i feel so bad for you, i hope you're doing better. i was never raped but i was sexually assaulted a couple of times and emasculated alot in my life ig that's why im on hrt now
>>82948083Yea, i lowkey think i might be trans and i have thought abt it. But i think in reality im just genderfluid. Somedays i dress very fem and femboy. Other is dress very masc and y2k like. idk gender is werid
>>82948101you know even tho im on hrt i don't identify as a woman. i still am cisgender even if trannies call me trans. im a lot more happier now in life it really makes me feel in the moment and no more perpetual thinking or overthinking. i still dress like a guy in public and only were fem stuff in private
>>82948101i just remembered! i forgot to tell you, i was molested by my mother and coerced to touch/suck on my sister's nipples while she played with herself when we showed up together. i was a kid at the time and was confused as to why she wanted me to do that. The memory didn't hit me till i was older. im still in denial it happened because i was little. as for my mom, she would try to touch my penis and crotch; she would also slap my butt and grope it when she was behind me or if i walked past her when I was in high school for some reason, and it made me not want any physical affection from anyone other than someone i thought of romantically. like, i don't like hugs anymore or anyone touching me at all anymore
>>82947511Hello saarjeet. I did not read your larp fantasy saar but I congratulate you for the needfuls thread saarjeet.
>>82948189Lmao that's so real. Mostly in private I dress in fem. Idk it just makes me comfortable
>>82948566Jesus christ. I'm so sorry that happened to you, I have heard other stories along those lines. Your mom is fucked for that. But Jesus christ I hope your doing well anon
>>82949458Thank you??But did you just call my rape sorry a larp fantasy? Fuck you man
Currently at work and talking Abt all that shit last night is making me anxious or sum idk. I have this feeling in my chest. I don't like it, I feel like I might relapse. Idk. I think when I get home tonight I'm gonna dress fem
>>82950882im doing better now still upset with her for it, but legit after telling about my incest encounters. i had a dream; i was grinding against my niece in different positions and about to have sex with her if other people weren't there. wtf, im so fucked in the head now. i hate myself>>82950882anon, please don't relapse if it's harmful, idk exactly what happened to you, and i didn't go though what occur to you but things will get better with time. have you told anyone what happened to you? i haven't for myself to anyone
>>82951572Yea I don't really have anyone to talk to this Abt other than 2 close freinds and one is my "therapist" I also don't wanna relapse but I do really have this nagging urge to dress fem. It's bad, but hopefully I won't go down a spiral when I get home today. And I'll be clear headed enough to not post myself
>>82951960well anon, i wish you the best and hopefully you figure everything out as to move past your trauma
This story would be more believable if you included a part about the STDs and how they made having sex extremely painful or impossible every now and then, and talked about the inevitable anal incontinence. Unlike in hentai manga, the lifestyle you describe leads to health issues.
>>82952827I thought that was all, like apart of the package and people could understand that. Yea ofc sometimes it just wouldn't go in and the forced it. Of course it was extremely painful badically every time. And I have actually a really great routine for shaving and douching myself to make sure I am clean. I however did contract 2 stds. Syphilis and chlamydia. I'm really ashamed of myself and I don't really enjoy getting into the disgusting details about my own body and it's functions or my cleaning routine. I came more to share my experience But nice feet porn, I lowkey have a foot fetish
>>82947511if true it sounds very messed up and sad I hope life gets better for you sending a hug
>>82954515Thank you so much. Hug accepted
