Helphelperlad editionPreviously: >>85647604
cheeky Marlboro Red, methings
Bumming adhd lass while Welper watches
cheeky rollie methinks x
vvvv this vvvv hits at the heart of the matter>>85652366if i were you? picrel.
I can feel a bumsesh comin on.
>>85654417>>85654423Vaping is cheaper and doesn't make you smell like shit x
Update from our Donald x
>>85654440>doesn't make you smell like shitsorry vapist, but it does
>>85654446Maybe if you use shit-flavoured vape liquid, sure.
>>85654443R Don? He clearly knows more than our own intelligent service.
I'm pissing snot out of my nose so much, it won't stop dripping snot and my hanky is wet af
footmong going mentalyou hate to see it
>intelligent servicemongboy jpg
what are these vans you see worker guys driving around england called why do you see them so often
I'm dripping cum out me arse so much, my gaped batty won't stop dripping creamy muck muck and me undies are wet af.
>>85654489why are man assholes oblong but women's assholes are circular ?
>>85654500Your arse goes like a coin slot after it's taken a few shaftings. Look up Nikocados arsehole de lad.
>>85654515Rather not de lad
>>85654515Not really. The image is mixing a real anatomical observation with a misleading explanation.The anus is not inherently "circular in men" and "a coin slot in women." At rest, the anal opening can look oval or slit-like in either sex because the sphincter muscles are constricted.There are genuine anatomical differences between males and females in the pelvic floor and anal sphincter. For example, studies find that parts of the external anal sphincter are generally longer in men than women.But those differences don't amount to a reliable "male = circle, female = slit" distinction. Individual anatomy varies substantially.And the claim that a person's anus becomes a "coin slot" after they've had anal sex several times is not a sound anatomical rule. The sphincters are muscular and normally contract back down after relaxation.So the reply in the screenshot is basically shitposting built around a small kernel of truth: anal openings can look different depending on anatomy, muscle contraction, position, etc., but you can't reliably determine someone's sex from whether their anus looks circular or slit-like.
Did a shit the other day and it was super soft, basically molded by the shape of my arsehole, you know like those playdough moulds you can get?well anyway looked in the bowel and it was like a ribbon
this is it my friends my last hit my last bump nay my SWAN SONG of ketamineit has been a privilege and an honour to serve you gentlemen with the feeliest of feels, but like ships passing in the night we must journey onwards! toward other things. like Tuesday. when i will have more ket in.
Bought a newer GERMAN edition of Desperate Housewives box set to replace my current UK box set. The discs are sort of okay but some have paint specks from the stupid cardboard packaging, don't they? Well they do. So better safe than sorry! It's a silly show to be fair but still... trying to do the same with my Scrubs in the cardboard and got a replacement for The Munsters (with cases instead of sleeves) as some of those are scraped really fucking badly.
worrying inkling that the anus expert is actually Chika imbs.
>>85654527silly grok, got the anuses the wrong way around
>>85654548I mean I might be, but that post wasn't me. I assumed it was AI. Generally when somebody posts a quick response factual wall of text, I imagine this to be the case. Either way, incredibly corrr postington ITT.
Me arse is definitely looser since engaging in the bumsesh lifestyle though.
>>85654532this shit i did was insane, basically did the whole bristol stool chart in one sitting and filled the bowl like 3 times
>>85654565certainly has that whiff of AI about it.you can't be too careful with these robots running around x
The Apus on Feel Street get more depraved year after year.
am i, therefore, saying 'Chika sounds like a robot'?i dunno. robots would probably be clever enough to blend in. so sounding like a robot would just be sounding.
>>85654599some chinky bloke would put a skewer through them and roast them alive and eat them whole
there is a strong argument to be made:it is better that there is no more ketamine.however, my opposing argument follows:i would like some more ketamine.
>*she* will never wear this for you
>>85654592Customer service chatbots have gotten better with AI I think though, it useful.>>85654574That sounds like a you problem. Skill issuerino.
hullo my name is zekbar how may i be of assisstanence?
Incel lives don't matter, not even to incels themselves
>>85654544Tried to watch Scrubs on one of the streaming platforms years ago and they replaced the music. Turned it off immediately. Just cannot be arsed
>>85654744Aye it's a ballache. My DVDs have the OG music but it's terrible cardboard packaging. That's why I just bought a German set that has individual cases. Kind of OTT but the UK discs in the sleeves haven't aged well.
Tortured by the knowledge that I'm only intelligent enough to understand how unintelligent i am
>ywn worm your way into a cute roses life
Might make a tiger bread baguettenshiteingtonberg tomorrow as cat lad would put it
Love being asleep me
why worm your way into a rose when you could worm your way into a sweet English Pie-ess.
Why the fuck has she butchered her eyebrows like it's 2005? Looks like a cheap skank now. Can't believe she's hitting the wall already and it won't be long before she's covered in tats.
tesco tiger loaf? best bread in the world?don't me HOWL!
Lovely, sweet scottish lass a few years ago. Looked so much better and her new look just sucks. Just not getting those vibes from her nowadays.
>>85654948She got that ssri look
>>85654975Best bread in England mate
You lot wonder why you can't get a crumb of pussy. Creepy!
Ring dingding ding dingRing dingding dingdingding
Not working myself to death and never having sex
>>85654945No rose or meat pie would ever care about us. We are just slugs to them.
>>85655021Im doing it for a laugh
>>85654986Probably the effects of being on them for years kicking in now. Kinda grim girls feel sad and depressed despite having everything going for them.I will never give in and take anti-depressants. Don't want my libido killed permanently.
Still in fucking tears at that image of Helper's gaped fucking batty. Why the hell did he do it?! When I close my eyes it's always there. Just why :(
>>85655051It was after he got cancelled as marmiteman4 he had to reinvent himself online and he decided to enter the UK gaping scene in the mid 2010s
>>85655000Is pretty creepy the behavior here lads obsessing over random girls. Imagine if that was your sister some incel on a vietnamese basket weaving forum was constantly posting about
Why did he do it lads? Just can't work it out x
Just garn get yourself a roly poly pie lass x
>>85655117This is how you don't give a fuck.
Got me One Day at a Time DVDs out. Corrrrr. Lush 70s MILF with a pervert building supervisor. It lush.
>>85655081Does your sister make lots of weird videos for validation?
If I knew as much about women as you lads I could get a gf easy
>>85654948Dead eyes and trash nailsImagine idolising THAT messTired gimmick hereTired gimmick thereAwful
>>85655151THREE nose ringsAwful
All these asmr bints ever do is talk about shopping, mental health, their Chads and "life updates". You watch one, you've seen them all.
>>85655151Would live to armpitfuck those hairy pits.
>UK to open new refugee resettlement routes for Afghan women and PalestiniansI can finally get a qt afghan gf
marmitemotorwayman more like
tfw getting a Palestinian gf
lads help i cant stop farting
>>85655184Puppy fat will turn into pudge soon. Fat hangers on the way lads.
>>85655184I miss 2011 asmr videos
>>85655204phwoar gud postmay take a trip too poopingham-under-naze meself imminentverily doth
Kittens with big soupy bellies are so damn cute!
>>85655151Post her porn plesse lad, I'm due a wank
>>85655183She is absolutely disgusting now. Used to be some hippy little rose with ambitions but then got into alcohol, clubbing and all that festival shit. Went to trash in just a few years...got lots of tats and piercings and was desperate enough to make porn on onlyfans. Grim.
>>85655170I don't idolise her now. Her videos are so fucking boring. Same shit over and over. She sold herself out.>>85655206Yeah she's getting a bit fat. Could do with a gym membership.>>85655208Long gone era lad. Now it's for girls to get some kind of validation and make money by putting their cleavage in the thumbnails.
>>85655243Corrrrrr! Maybe she could do a Sid from Ice Age cosplay and get her titties out for the cavelads!
>>85655243How are you doing in the looks department?
Wonder how Ruth's channel would be doing now if she wasn't stalked off the internet. I reckon she'd be into lifestyle vlogs by now. Vlogging all them CAMRA beer festivals.
>>85655243she looks homely and cute
>>85655204Think you might have IBS little lad
>>85655283He's a dead ringer for Tobey Maguire apparently
>>85655222sparkletaco7 I think was her OF.
>>85655243when you're in your 30s any girl mid/young 20s starts looking like a 10 desu
>>85655297>IBSyep i have all the symptoms
>>85655303You'd hope he'd be better looking to make up for his personality.
>>85655279She's was a poor man's anya taylor joy but Sid is more fitting for her now.>>85655283I can't control my genetics but at least I am not a degenerate slag that covers myself in tats.>>85655295She WAS but not any more.>>85655303Maybe in my teenage years. Probably not now.
>>85655328She has sex, lad.
Need an IBS GF to fart in my face after I make her curry.
Ugly bitter virgin unc omd,
>>85655287She could do all that but she simply never wanted to be "famous". If she can't handle a few internet mongs then that's her problem. She needs to grow up.
>>85655337Sex which I got to watch and never even bothered wanking to. That's how grim she is with all them tats. I tried. Boner killer.
Full blown mental break down earlier xIn a safe place nows x
Pity sex.
And waurel hit the wall at 26 but at least she never whored herself out like some of the asmr bints. Turkish women at least have some standards about themselves.
>>85655276Fat. Awful.
>>85655309Gross. Awful.
>>85655439As if a 20 year old would find you appealing.
>>85655431Five head. Awful.
>>85655452Delish
>>85655452OnlyFans stint. She will fail. Scarred for life.
Imagine idolising YouTube attention whores. Hilarious.
>>85654948Look at the blotches on her skin. She's trying hard to cover it with all that fake tan and makeup lately. She could be pregnant or got some herpes flare up going. Lots of skin to skin with deanos.
>>85655465She's not doing OF. She just posts photos like that in hopes a rich Chad simp will notice her and buy her lots of gifts. At least she doesn't have any tattoos.
>lol let me whisper at you all about that cheese sandwich I had and my bf Tom>like and subscribeHilarious.
>>85654744They did the same with my based Baywatch (except the main theme). Ruined it.
>>85655485She will relent and do OnlyFans. Then you'll have to find another attention whore to idolise. Tragic.
>>85655452Trash bracelet. Rings will follow. Awful.
>>85655452Tonights wank material sorted, cheers
>>85655494I have the German DVD sets that has ALL the original music and the original aspect ratio. Fucking lush. It's a stupid but very entertaining show.
State of that washing up. Lazy cow probably still relies on her mother to do all the house jobs. Us Brit losers have tiny kitchens probably the size of their walk in closet.>>85655495Hope not lad. She'll likely have tattoos if she gets into onlyfans. I will not like it at all.>>85655503Don't mind rings and piercings in moderation. Belly piercings definitely work with me.>>85655507She's fit and that's probably the sexiest of her.
>>85655551Yeah but I like watching it in HD for obvious reasons.
Foodington digestan rnInnitX
corrr and so the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina have come to an end.dunno what this Riverdale programme is but it's all magic and stuff too. mad seeing the difference from a glitzy Netflix show to a normal American network telly show.they were really pushing it saying this lassie was 16, now she looks about 30. but it's OK because there was an off-screen timeskip where her bf sacrificed himself to resurrect her, and then he goes into one of the Riverdale's characters' bodies for a bit so they didn't have to hire that original actor.i have learned so much about the patriarchy, racism, and transmisogyny. but on balance i like the original 90s sitcom a lot more.
>>85655472Nah lad just interesting to see how different some people live compared to men. They seem to have very easy going lives I notice.>>85655486And yet their lives are more interesting than yours.>what did I do in my boxroom today>I turned my computer on and opened up /britfeel/ to see it all again
>hey this is my sister and her friends party>let me go upstairs for a piss and get GTA for you to borrow lad...wait down here, I won't be long>*takes 20 minutes*>you just stand there awkwardly>the girls just ask you awkward questions and say "why doesn't he speak much" whilst giggling half drunkhated mates that would leave you in awkward situations.
>ok class we're doing this project for the next few lessons, find a partner>always the odd one outBrutal recurring school memory.>arrive to class too late>everybody is already sitting down>decide to skip class and walk around the woods>police pull me over and drop me off back at school in marked car in front of every one>tried to fine my parents 50 quid in 2006 for not attending schoolThey just thought I was doing it deliberate but I just found everything very awkward in secondary school. There wasn't any mental health or autism support then. Not that it would have done any difference to me anyway.
>>85655577I feel you. Baywatch is an interesting case. They had to go back to the original negatives and literally remake the episodes again. This results in some episodes having completely different shots than the original as well as footage straight up not there. It's less a remaster and more a HD approximation.
Really wish the streaming services would just put every episode of their old westerns online (Gunsmoke and Bonanza). It's like they don't want my fucking money!
time to wrap up in bed. nothingburger day ahead, but it'll be nice to give the ol' bladderberg a rest.good night all
Polished this off about three hours ago. 49p for 2 ltrs of sugarless electrolytes and caffeine is both a wonder of modern convenience and utter poison. Whats that Japanese word for spiteing your sleep routine for no good reason?
Fuck it, Im pissing in it
Got the thread to myself. Gonna post.. er.. Nothing really. Dynamism problem.
Nonce Guard
Getting cold now. The dark and cold autumn nights are rolling in thick and fast
>>85656352Landlord pays for the heating. Gonna be on full blast this season (The radiator dosent work. Will crank it to 6 and just pretend)
Update, didnt piss in it
>>85656196Forgot to scrub your EXIF anon. Hows the weather is Jersey this time of night?
Update, pissed on the carpet instead
Update, got pissed on
Update, licked it off my fingers
update: just woke up, work in 40, actually slept fine but still tired af, garn holiday on friday though so just need to power through, it monday
>>85654904If they cry when they whisper does that get them more attention?
>>85655619You're a broken record and somewhat defensive. If you follow these performative attention seekers, and you yourself draw attention to the fact you follow them, then that opens you up to criticism - especially given the trajectory that most of these women take (and the body of evidence is growing in that respect). You cannot simply avoid ridicule by commenting on them here when it's you that chooses to follow/platform/idolise these basic women - and you will never, ever be anything more than a money source to them.You're a simp. You're beyond any form of help. And as such if you keep posting here about your sad, deluded hobby you open yourself up for ridicule. Simple, really.
>>85656835>>85657159>>85657361Night shift in a piss nutshell.
I have awokenHave i notX
Clocking out of the night shift. Desperate for proper staff, some twat did a little piss on the floor and the DEI autistic hire who dosent know how a PDF works tried cleaning it up with his hands. What are they like ay? Alright, see you again tomorrow.
>>85654948Career in an office coven in her future. Administrator probably. Low level HR lackey.
>>85657699what does your future look like, pal?
Friend has an autistic spacker daughter with absolutely cracking big tits on her. Alt lifestyle, well spoken, she doesn't need to mask so much when I'm with her since I "get" her.Trouble is, she's 16. On paper I'm old enough to be her dad (just), and I am diamond-hard when she dresses up.
>>85657724Self employed plumber. Doing just fine desu.
>>85657694Cheers boss. Drive safe.
Imagine using weak ad hominem in defence of your creepy simp hobby. Keep it up, if your theorising about tired 4chan tropes makes you feel better about your ridiculous pastime, you crack on. Hilarious.>bu-but ur boxroom ur here all day waaaThere, there. That soothes your plastic little branez, doesn't it? You say that as much as you need to if it helps you. Heh.
>>85657777nice numbers>>85657737>plumbergrim
You lads have a good day. You'll never be shining examples so just stick to being terrible warnings. Here's what you become when failure manifests.
>>85657782I love the work. I live in a nice part of England and I am selective about the work I do - no literal shit jobs, most of my work is self build custom work so I get to meet people with a good budget who aren't cunts. Pay is good. Lots of cash work.
>>85657777qvads of trvth
>>85657782Training as a gas engineer too, thats another easy money income stream.
>no new asmr content from dead eyed, washed up attention seeking women>ooh! a new auditor video from dead eyed, antagonistic attention seeking little menWhat a timeline, eh? Hilarious.
>>85655711Remember in junior school I was upset and crying over something at the end of break time so the teacher told me to just sit in the corridor outside the class room. So I just stayed there alone for an hour until the class ended, when the teacher came out and had a go at me. Apparently I was supposed to just go back in on my own when I felt better. How the fuck was I supposed to know that?
>>85657731>Autistic "masking"what a joke. If you can pretend to be normal then maybe you really are just normal.
Very good morning de lids. It Monday. Today I shall be visiting Bude before my courier work commences in Launceston at 11am. Expecting around 40-50 packets overall, so should be a good day. No rain forecast and no wind, so some van tunes shall be the order of the day.
>>85657846Dripping with irony.
>>85657900How so big lad?
>>85657869What's in Bude that's so interesting?
