I resonated quite deeply with the idiot of the show which made me really go "oh shit" - I'm in the self disrespecting friendship he's in with homelander with a friend of my own, stupidly stubborn, I blamed X people for ruining my life when realistically I made my own choices - yes they effed me up but I didn't have to continue down that path - I did it out my own ego. I'm thirty almost and staring down the barrel of a ruined twenties, like homelander in the finale I feel like god is keeping me around cause its a bigger torture to keep me going then to just kill me. wtf does a self aware idiot do?
When I hit 30 I realized I had be a retard in my 20's. I talked to my grand dad about it and he said he had done the same thing for every decade of his life. But roughly 30 years old is a really good age to turn your life around. It's possible to turn your life around when you're 40 but it's much harder. It's almost impossible when you're 50+. I'm not trying to stress you out, but you don't have infinite time. Use the time you have well because you won't get it back.
>>34552388mission received , but how do I get some direction? I built my entire identity around being "smart" and I'm not cut out for manual labor and realistically shoulda been a theatrefag when I was a kid but it was never an option where I grew up. Whatever I hung my hat on in my twenties never came to fruition, the only dream I really had left was my goal of becoming a content creator and reviewing books and writing and I never did it out of fear of failure and impracticality of even "making it"
>>34552393You have to decide what YOU want to do and live with that decision. I regret not getting an engineering degree because it can pay well and you don't have to touch anything physical if you don't want to. It's not even math heavy a lot of the time it's paperwork and phone calls and meetings. But it pays way better than being a teacher or other comparable 4 year degrees. That's what I regret not doing. Me. My story. You need to decide what you actually want to do. If you're a people person you might like teaching. You might like doing a trade like making cabinets or maybe there's some local employer you like. You basically have most doors in life still open to you.
>>34552411I'm almost finished my comp sci degree after nearly failing it the first time at a top 5 school which really shook me and , I'm just finishing it now at a B bordering on C tier school locally and I can't get a job with it cause the market is screwed so I'm lowkey prepping for homelessness I wish I did something with people but I worked people jobs and lowkey it never ended well anywhere at all
>>34552449Academically im only hovering around a 3.0 GPA at the B tier school so I'm not even academically inclined so I don't think I want to do more school , I wanted to finish comp sci only cause it was the shit that beat me the first time - purely out of doing something hard