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/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.

1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.
2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.
3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.
4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.
5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).
6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text.
7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.
8. You cannot post a picture without text.
9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).
10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.
11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.
12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.

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>tfw your oneitis gets a bf
>tfw you realize they're no longer a virgin
>tfw you realize they've already experienced their first time
>tfw you realize they've already been pounded by another man
>tfw you realize there's no point anymore
>tfw oneitis know that she's your oneitis
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>tfw hot cousin is in a relationship with a guy and has probably lost her virginity by now
I was supposed to be her first...
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Just get over it lmao. Be yourself.

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So, what do you guys collect? Why do you collect it, how big is your collection?

I collected Wojak (Obsessively) and currently have 368 wojaks.
I also collect flags, which is a much smaller collection. I have a Union Jack, German flag and a Dutch flag. I currently have a 2nd Reich flag being shipped to me.
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1.25 GB worth of various things from 4chan.
Only 1.25? Meh senpai i got more on my phone
used to have 3000 images on my phone before it got fucked.
Guys, he's been in office for a couple months and has actually said not to enforce Obamacare penalties, it's alright to question some things, but it's really about pragmatism in politics. He's like Nixon desu. Although he should be hurrying up with making anime real and giving us sex bots with functioning uterus. I'm a little disappointed that we are 4 months in and there are still unmurdered roasties.
I have a box I collect beer bottlecaps in, not sure what to do with them or why I even keep them

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>tfw going to sleep

Isn't it just the best part of the day? Drifting off into night night land? Perhaps i'll have a lucid dream, perhaps i'll dream that I have a GF, perhaps i'll dream that i'm a social butterfly and not a complete disappointment to my family. The possibilities are endless lads. I never feel as excited for what I don't know is to come as I do when i'm going to sleep.

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Sleeping is the best part of any day, but of course i'm lucky so i only have dreams every once in a while and i can't control my dreams too much
>tfw dreamless and sad
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fuck yea dude after a hard day of work, I get home, shower watch some anime, hit the sack with some asmr or white noise to get that nice bedtime rest. Sleeping in on Saturdays is the best fucking feeling.
You guys ever had any weird cool dreams? Fuck I cant remember my dreams after like a day but when I wake up, god damn were they cool.
Makes me wish I could dream forever.
I also constantly dream of my younger high school self. What does that mean?
> create a universe in a dream with an amazing world and have lifelong friends
>can't remember any of it enough to revisit
>only happens once every couple months

If only I could live there forever.
I like sleeping, but don't like going to sleep. It's time wasted.
I've also had these, eyes nearly shut while I'm trying to run away from something and I keep stumbling over until the fear wakes me up.
not many. I did have a weird one where a 40-something psychopath with Ozzy hair tried shooting up the school with a machine gun, but I stopped him with kung-fu moves. Strange dream.

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Let's start a That Kid Thread R9K

>That one fat Autistic kid that dreamed of singing their favorite song in front of the whole school and making his crush like him and becoming the most popular kid in the whole school
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>that one Autistic kid that growls and barks like a dog to people and has girls try to act nice to him
>that one Autistic kid that feels the need to do things in even increments usually in increments four
>That kid that tries to figure out which way things might fall or the perfect points to hit someone on and come up with a plan to take anyone around you out and what moves to use based on nothing but surroundings and probability
>that kid who sang beetles songs at the top of his lungs in the bathroom on the other side of the wall from our homeroom during a moment of silence 4 days in a row to see how mad he could make the failed stacey teacher
>that one kid with OCD who gets pissed and starts screeching Autistically when someone does something unusual or moves something slightly

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Fucking shat my pants at the barbers today.
Tell me embarressing stories about yourself to get over this humiliation.
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Holy fuck post the entire story please.
Did you get new pants at least?
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Woke up late in the day and I was 10 minutes late for my appointment, I didnt even make coffee I just rushed out the house without taking a piss, shit or anything.
I thought it was just going to be a quick cut, but the cute girl there ended up washing my hair.
Her fingers were so soft running through my scalp, I decided to let out a subtle comfort fart and I ended up shitting my pants.

It was at that moment I stood up, admitted to losing control of my bowels and I just left.
I can't go back.
When I was 5 I wet the bed while staying at my grandma's house and was too embarrassed to say anything. I went to school the next day with soaked pants and even though no one said anything, I'm pretty sure people could tell.
i remember being 6 years old and shitting my pants at the beginning of the day and having to just deal with it for the entire day sloshing around in my britches, too afraid to say anything because my mother used to beat my ass for doing it and it ended up happening when i got home anyway

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I need guidance

>moms best friend has daughter same age as me
>grow up together, inseparable as kids
>she puberties into 9.9999/10 qt3.141
>I turn into kind of person who posts here
>her group of friends bully me for a while
>got into a blow out with one of them, they mostly leave me alone now
>her dad gets riddled with cancer, her family lose house, mom invites them to move in with us "for a while"
>my room is biggest, has changing room/bathroom
>they divide my room in half with a big bookcase, and we're supposed to share a room "for a while"
>my uncle asks if its safe to have two teenagers share a room and my mom literally laughs feelsbad.cpp
>the week they move in her dad dies in hospital, she spirals into depression, barely talks, rarely goes to school, stays in bed all day
>desk built into wall, can't be moved, half on her side of the room, can't even browse my mongolian basket weaving enthusiast forum on pc when shes on her bed without her seeing it
>masturbating in peace is very difficult

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What state and town are you in Op?
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Okay thanks. What title are you going to add so we can filter it? When are you uploading it, in the afternoon, night or morning?

Also, if you're going to send an insta make sure you cover the name of the profile, there's a lot of anons who may try to troll you.
Blaming your inactivity on the shirt is a psychological trap; a coping mechanism so you can just think "haha if it wasn't for that minor thing my life wouldn't be fucked". If not for the shirt you'd blame something else.
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I'll be there tomorrow OP, I feel you and want this to end well
tfw mods are too busy posting blacked/asianmasculinity threads to underage b&

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>and I just won!

where did it all go so very wrong
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Probably not because of the nature of modern social media and because the overwhelming majority of the current userbase are normalfags that use it. Politics are too trendy, commercialized and sports-ified now and I doubt it will change.
Imagine this scene from the contest being the last scene in a Chris-chan epic biographical movie. Would be very fitting.

watching this and having many keks
>she only had to fuck him, so much could have been avoided
this little boy does a really good girl voice, i can understand why chris would fall for it but the other guy does a shit job at a elder voice

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What is MBTI:

In-depth look at theory and types:



Big Five (Openness, Conscientiousness, Extroversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism)

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I'm the person you replied to, and uh, what misogyny?
Also I do take care of myself physically. I just have a mental block about social interaction.
Well there are a lot of gay guys on 4chan. I'm not going to assume le gender.

If you're a female trying to flirt with a male, it's kind of easy. If you're not in a situation where you two have to talk to each other--like you being a cashier and him being a patron--then it'll be harder than otherwise.

So in cases like being forced to talk to one another, just start with this line: "So what are you up to [today/tonight/this evening]?" Then he'll tell you something, and you have to find something he just said to ask a further question about--just nod your head before you do to show you understood what he said. From there, the convo should come naturally.

If you have to initiate discussion... wew, I don't know. Women don't initiate conversations. You're on your own there.
You should seriously consider that you might have ADD. Depression is possible too, but that usually expresses itself in intuitives as an inability to get excited about ANYTHING.
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>You should seriously consider that you might have ADD. Depression is possible too, but that usually expresses itself in intuitives as an inability to get excited about ANYTHING.
I'm not hyperactive at all, and definitely have trouble getting excited about things.

>Mom drank all the milk

>tells me to "just eat the dry cereal" The """"""""DRY"""""""" cereal
>just use water teee heee!

So this is what true rage is......
>family hates skim milk
>I hate 2%

we don't have an issue

plus I can drink straight from the gallon
i never eat cereals with milk

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when was last time you puked, anon?
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About a year or so ago when I was really sick. Guess that was more like two years ago, actually
4 years ago because I got some illness or something.
A couple years ago when I got food poisoning from Denny's
I have masturbated to this video btw its good
I really don't remember, but definitely around 5-6 years ago from food poisoning.
I got blind stinking drunk last Christmas Eve after my gf cheated on me so I puked a lot that day. Last time it happened too.

My hard drive is nothing but a collection of genetic freaks. It's full of women with enormous natural breasts nearly the size of or bigger than their own heads with narrow waists and huge buttocks. These women are very uncommon in the general population yet I have amassed a collection of tens of thousands of images of them.

As time goes by I have begun to worry about the effects of this on society. Over the long span of time, let's say the next 30 years or so there is going to a critical mass of photos posted on the internet of women who represent such incredible physiology that a normal man can hardly ever encounter in his life that it will draw every man to mindlessly masturbate all day long to these powerful images, and he will be disappointed when he sets foot out his door and realizes normal women do not look like the anomalies he has become used to. No normal women will measure up to 50 years of internet history and the best of the best porn stars and amateurs that have amassed in that time.
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I wonder if Hitomi ever thinks about how rare this experience is and if she considers herself lucky to have had it.
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Fag. Drink your damn milk.
>doesn't even know who Daktari is

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I used to be the LordOfLactation but I stepped down. So yeah, I don't know everything.
For her it was probably just a paycheck.
I don't get turned on by 3DPD anymore. That video actually made me throw up a little in my mouth.

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I need to tell this before i go to sleep.
I got invited to a party and there was this cute robot looking guy sitting alone. So we talked a lot (usually i cant talk with people) and eventually we left the party and just walked around, it was night. He said i was cute and blah blah. Then he went with me to my house and my sisters and brother were looking at us from the window. And he said "are they expecting something?" and i said "they probably want us to kiss" and he said "alright, im gonna give you a tongue deep kiss now". Then he leaned towards me and i opened my mouth but he just kissed my cheek. He said "were you just trying to kiss me for real?" and i quickly said "N-no" but he laughed and said i was stupid and left. I know im retarded.
nice larp op
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If you're not a gay boi tits or gtfo
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>"alright, im gonna give you a tongue deep kiss now"
>he just kissed my cheek
It's okay. I just tried walking down to the row of 'poppin' bars near campus to see if I could muster the courage to go in and order a drink, and maybe even talk to someone, but that of course never happened, I pussied out and walked past the bars and around the block 3 times trying to muster the courage to just walk inside before giving up and walking home, hating myself and my cowardice more each time.

Not that it's a competition.

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>cancer kills millions of normies a year
>still no cure

why. billions go into research. why can't they cure it?
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everyone has at least a few tumors but they are not growing out of control for now
Instead of trying to treat it we should turn it into an advantage. I believe we are going about the cancer meme the wrong way.
>Cancer could be cured in a week if they wanted to
You don't know what cancer is, do you? What you're saying is much more complicated than you think.
The answer to that question is somewhere in here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hY0PaHhYKPI
Cancer is fundamentally incurable. Diets have changed so much that we trigger the development of cancer cells more often now. The best way to avoid cancer would be stop eating shit, live healthy etc

>babby's first atheist shitpost

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>mfw some /pol/ neckbeard tells you to go back to Africa even though white people are the ones that brought your ancestors here in the first place
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w-wew lad. We were talking about America, weren't we? That's the context I'm used to hearing when I hear "GO BACK TO AFRICA".

no, there was initially a market for cheap labor to work cotton fields. It's just bad luck that slave labor, specifically the closest being Africa, was the best way to do it. It's the fault of the producers who captured the slaves in the first place.
Other blacks?

Read a fucking history book, the slave trade already existed. The worst you can argue is that the Europeans caused it to snow ball by introducing an increased demand and supply of superior weapons. Your kings were the ones who sold your ancestors out, full stop.

Before Europeans ever purchased slaves there was already an existing slave trade mostly flowing across the Saharan desert to North Africa and Muslim lands.
All I see is a yapping nigger when you could be loading up onto that boat, boy.
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>The transatlantic slave trade began during the 15th century when Portugal, and subsequently other European kingdoms, were finally able to expand overseas and reach Africa. The Portuguese first began to kidnap people from the west coast of Africa and to take those they enslaved back to Europe.

white people really are the devils spawn
African slaves in Africa were akin to the European serf. You're second point is correct and that is what I'm arguing. White people took them out of their country and put them in a place where they weren't just considered "lesser people" they weren't considered people, and we still aren't by /pol/ types

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