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/r9k/ - ROBOT9001

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11/28/15New trial text board added: /news/ - Current News
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/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.

1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.
2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.
3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.
4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.
5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).
6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text.
7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.
8. You cannot post a picture without text.
9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).
10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.
11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.
12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.

katya getting fat is one of the funniest things i've seen in a while
bravo katya
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Well, like Bilbo once said :

The answer is time !
I don't see it

how is she fatter
she looks significantly cuter tbqh
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You are right.

Retards in there can't into camera's angle.
How many dicks do you think she has sucked?

You are given immortality and a gold coin then sent back to 1490. What do?
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I was thinking of doing it this way >>24675138
First acquire money, then work yourself up in the hierarchy. I'm sure that Europeans knew how to make steel around the 1600's
It's like that fucker in Greek mythology who had to have his liver chewed out by an eagle every day for eternity.
Aztecs had a lot of gold and I presume other metals, I wouldn't need a lot to impress them and tell them I'm a god. "I made running gold animal, I create life I god"
I don't know why everyone is underestimating these cultures. This is people in 1490, not cavemen.
>Unite the natives in preparation for the coming of yurup
>slaughter columbus
>rule the americas with the power of a god

What kind of music do you guys like to listen to? Im pretty curious to see if theres a variety of different tastes on here or if everyone simply gravitates to the same kind of shit.
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i really like hardcore punk. this boston band called Defeater is probably my favorite.

also (some of them probably arent acutal hardcore sorry not a genre nazi)
>pianos become the teeth
>boys night out
>have heart
>norma jean
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normie who listens to edm detected

get out
Edm ain't all bad
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prove it then plz
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I haven't listened to ratatat, I'm not the anon you were talking with, I just randomly decided to rec you something.

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>You're at school, learning about the twin towers.

>Chad's fucking her pussy for hours.
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>who is she?

Your oneitis
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>you post your torment on /r9k/
>a mere text from him can brighten her day
>you're cleaning the cum towel
>hes plunging her bowels
>what is history class

Honestly it's hard to grasp the idea that the twin towers are so deep in history kids are learning about them as things they never saw or knew about.
>you make pasta for her
>chad fucks her while calling her a racial slur

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>tfw no racist gf
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Isn't that that parody twitter where she has sex with her brother and wants incest to be legalized or something?
based black guy, would hang out with
How is it possible for someone to become that fat? Like wouldn't she want to do shit to stop the weight gain after becoming a little fat?
this is how a natural woman looks, maybe if you'd stop looking at airbrushed porn stars and went outside you'd realize that

honestly shit like this makes me think that it's MEN who can't be robots. how can you possibly consider yourselves lonely while at the same time being such judgmental pigs?
you aren't very good at this

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Women hate thread
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>video of an angry face, the screen progressively turns redder as the face is zoomed in on, a loud breathing sound is heard
>girl btw xDXDXDXDXD

I hope you die screaming.
elliot? Rodgers? The virgin killer?
we live in a world where being a complete fucking whore is "empowering" and Jar Jar Binx has the powers of Yoda.

someone is fucking with the timeline.
Elliot Rodger rampage was last year fucking newfag.

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I'll start.
Daniel, Avery, Dylan, Zane, Lawrence, Greg

You're a literal faggot if you disagree tbqhwyfam
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That is just hilarious, sorry. Reminds me of this other robot that said his name is Just. He said it's not short for Justin or anything, but his name is just, well, JUST.

Josh, Mitch, Dolan.
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>DAE 90s kids?!?!

>"what's your name?"

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I genuinely am.
Kameron here. My parents wanted it to be unique. Most common mistake I get is Kevin. Sadly my middle name is Milford, so no help there.
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Go to the local courthouse and change your name to something you like, you dingus. It's not that hard if you have a little bit of money.

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Create your own waifu and rate others.
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There are no options to give your waifu dark circles under her eyes.
Whatever this will do.
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I don't ask much
>xbox controller
>parallel sticks
u wot m8 it's obviously just a generic controller
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As close to my oneitis as I can get.
The colored buttons are xbox exclusive.

Guess she's using some pleb tier madcatz playstation controller.

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Who's /aspergers/ here?
Not diagnosed but have some signs:
> stay alone in my room 95% of the time
> hardly leave house
> don't like small talk
> no desire of socializing
> have trouble with normal functioning
> sometimes slightly sperg out
> lazy

counter signs:
> good social intuition
> recognize faces
> no strong interests (drop things out/get bored quickly)
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>tfw posted the wrong gif and the one I wanted to post is too big by 50 kb
i could probably pass but i dont care so i dress strangely, opting for the traditional autism boot rather than trainers.

i know some of the thing i do are strange based on the behaviors being pointed out but i dont see why
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how do you guys dress?

The older I get, the more I'm convinced that I'm somewhere on the spectrum

>24 years old
>never had any friends
>KV (of course)
>spend almost all of my time alone
>crowds and loud noises make me dizzy and disoriented
>sometimes my head starts spinning even when I'm in a supermarket

I wish I had some sort of diagnosis, but then again, that'd probably spell the end for any sort of career I could ever hope to have.
wtf is going on in this picture I can't tell where the girl begins and where she ends

The censoring doesn't help any, either

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So; how DO you cope?
Option 2 to improve myself

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>"anon, it's been such a perfect day! Im glad I spent it with you, I've been so depressed lately, but you just keep me hanging on!"
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transitioning will do that to you.
Who knew Lil Ugly was a robot.
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>thinking that's hot

hello homo
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>le realy women have curves meme
upbooat! XD

I want reddit to leave
i hate reddit, but i also hate titlets and hiplets even more

they just dont turn me on at all whatsoever. i need wide hips, luscious thighs and big tits to get hard

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tell me your fetishes /r9k/
bonus points for non faggot stuff
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Alright alright, I'm doing it right now
wish i was a giant.
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Wish I was being crushed to death by one
Yea same, but I have a hard time getting off to 2d giantess tbqh. Unlike normal size
its weird, theres really nothing sexual about it all. but the thought of being a giant and crushing and eating people makes me rock hard

its really a shame the community is shit tier

Daily reminder if you watch anime you are beyond saving, you insufferable faggot.

I'm a complete autistic cunt with no friends and I would never stoop so low as to make cartoons a hobby into adulthood, what's the fucking point?
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I have no other source of happiness anywhere, it feels pathetic so you're right. But I don't feel bad about it
No, no, anon, I told you that it's all okay now. You don't have to try so hard to fit in.
yes, because despite being a loser by choice I could easily be alpha if I didn't like the neet lifestyle. Good luck keeping a good looking girlfriend when she finds out you like car2ns.
least you admit it's pathetic I guess, still pretty sad that you don't just play vidya or some shit instead.
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Good thing I only read manga then.

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>trainer at gym calls me the energizer button because I just keep going and going
>she has no idea that I have a crippling dependency on stimulants

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