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/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.

1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.
2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.
3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.
4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.
5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).
6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text.
7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.
8. You cannot post a picture without text.
9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).
10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.
11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.
12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:
http://blag.xkcd.com/2008/01/14/robot9000-and-xkcd-signal-attacking-noise-in-chat/
>>
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.

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Is becoming a girl the only way to escape the robot life?

Redpill me on women please
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>>
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>>28905259
i don't follow r/redpill/

i just look around and see how bad and shallow relationships have become, the state thrives on divorces.

I don't blame women for having the power of choice and wanting the best genes for their offspring , i blame myself for being alive.

All of this life is such a fucking waste of time
>>
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>>28905367
>i blame myself for being alive
I'm sure you recognize that's an illogical statement.

You speak of pitty.

Of course, we can trace back the social climate to the development of capitalism after the industrial revolution. It's shitty, but it could even be worse (people starving like in 1820 Europe) and there is more to life than your biological goal.
>>
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>>28905480
>there is more to life than your biological goal.
Not really, that's my only purpose, to carry my genetic material forward, a man that is incapable of that is an evolutionary failure.

Your sole purpose on this rock is make sure the human race remains alive by making more of it.

All i want is a new Motorcycle and to crash it at 300+ kmh, die in a blaze of glory

I have no reason to be alive, i didn't have a choice, my parents have been idiotic enough to copulate at the age of 20 and get married.

My only choice is when to leave this shit
>>
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>>28905544
>Not really, that's my only purpose, to carry my genetic material forward, a man that is incapable of that is an evolutionary failure.
You're completely spooked but okay. You seem like you want to believe it, so you don't have to act upon the world.
>>
>>28905544
evolution and genes are only part of the explanation.

Until we know more (if ever) why think it's the only point of life?

Yeah it's the most comprehensive explanation so far, but that doesnt make it correct.

Once ppl believed much stupider things and one day we will transcend the knowledge we have now.
To base my entire meaning on the collective theories developed so far is something I wont do.

For me, life is about creating your own meaning.

Feels thread memes
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>>
an anon posted this and it made me feel.
>>
>>28901996
Look at all of the people. They each had their own life full of experiences, worry, fear, doubt. No one ever really truly believes in their own death. They think they're special, they're above it all.

And they're all dead now.
>>
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Pic related always gets to me.
>>
>>28900948
Why the fuck does she sit like that? Does she not realize she is fucking up her posture?
>>
>>28901928
Fuck off, SuperTroopers is a masterpiece. Fuckin' roasties yo.

>tfw your into weeb shit and white boys and all the other black girls make fun of you and call you a whitey just bc of your interests and your well spoken.
>tfw you have crushes on racist nerdy white boys who will never love you back.
:( i might kill myself tbhq. i just wanna be loved!
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>>
>>28905787
oh kek
same here!
>>
L O N D O N ?
O
N
D
O
N
?

origami
>>
>>28905733
Maybe, but in my experience if you're one of those things, eventually it comes out that you're all of those things, and you, 'lady' sound entitled af... so unless you want to step down off your high horse, I'm sticking with the belief you are exactly like all the other cunts who just bitch and moan about life not being fair
>>
ohyhhhhmy willyfeelssogood;))))endlessWILLYPLEASURE.
u wanna some willy wanking tips I give you some my willywanking grasshopper
>step 1: grab your willy
>step 2: waggle it up and down!!!!!!
>step 3: even tho it hurts waggle it to FULLJOY!!!!mmHHHHmmmmmwaggleurwilly;))
>step 4: CUM WILLY JUICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!myWIIIIIIIIIILLLLYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

,,,,,,\|,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,|
,,,,,,,\:,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,F
,,,,,,,,L:,,,,,,,,,,,,,-,-,,,,,,,,,,,,,,/
,,,,,,,,,':,,,,,,,,,,,,/,),,\,_,,,,,,,,,|
,,,,,,,,,,,',,,,',,,,-(-"")',,),,,,,,,,,,,L
,,,,,,,,,,,,',__,-',,|,,',,'|,',,,,,,,,,,,\
,,,,',,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,'!_',,,|-,,,,,,,,,,,,\
,'-,_,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,"',,,)::",,,,,,,,,,L

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>>
>>28905768
No I just can't fathom a stinky person being clean. We hate disgusting smells for a good reason.

but seriously you've fucked 17? Are you from New York by chance? That sounds new yorkish

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>suicide is selfish
>but demanding a person remain alive in excruciating agony just so you personally don't your feelings hurt isn't
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>>
>>28905399
This is a good point. Young people are self-centered and don't realize that it was not their choice to have been born, and that having been rich or poor makes no difference to anyone in the end. There is no such thing as a failed life by objective standards, at least not today when nobody's malnourished anymore. Just keep existing, damn you, there's no difference if you suffer or don't suffer, but staying alive until you're killed off by an external agency will likely cause your people less grief.
>>
>women aborts child
>not selfish at all
>"HURR DURR IT'S MY BODY I DO WHAT I WANT WITH IT"
>>
>>28905613
why should it be selfish? It isn't even a human.

>>28905561
Why should it be sellfish?
>>
>>28905655
>Why should it be sellfish?
Because you're doing it for selfish reasons like getting your precious genes passed on and getting the approval of your parents and society.
>>
>>28905725
It's weird how robots are so mindful of keeping the auld bloodline alive, when prosperous people have been known to adopt children since time immemorial. I don't know what to make of that.

>>28905531
>Calling suicide selfish is pretty dumb in a society that believes it's ok to let sick people die in the streets if they can't afford medicine

My theory is that a potential suicide epidemic can also claim the lives of promising young people who are just then undergoing a typical pubescent crisis of identity, which is what scares those in charge. They know that 85% of humanity is worthless, always has been, always will be. But the tragic death of one single gifted kid who is among the 15% of the genetically determined elite, well that is an actual loss to society.

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>Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suit on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourselves. Choose your future. Choose life
>>
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oy m8 ya think ya fuken special for postin that yaself ay?

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You decide! Whichever side has the most votes wins. This fucker has been pissing me off for years and my mother won't get rid of it. So I've decided to take justice into my own hands.
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>>
you're not gonna shoot the cat, you love that faggot
in the end you won't be able to bring yourself to
>>
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>>28905514
>>28905540
>>28905563
>>28905570
>>28905602
>>28905663
>>28905750
Wtf is wrong with you people? I mean look at the lil bitch. She's fuckinh asking for it. Anyone who says differant is a beta cuckold trying to get some pussy. Peta fags
>>
>>28905757
I remember when I was 14 and cared about such petty things.
>>
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>>28905828
Anal pained, cat owning redditor detected
>>
do it

oregano

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You have the chance to blackmail a qt and demand ONE thing, whatever it may be. What would you do? I'll start:
> Eat an entire jar of mayonnaise
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>>
Probably something boring like wear the most obvious slut getup for a day.
>>
>>28905517
tell her to post nudes on r9k, explicitly explaining that she is posting because of blackmail
>>
>>28905517
give me her socks
>>
>>28905517
Give her a lethal dose of morphine
and watch
>>
>>28905588
> Cucking oneself on purpose
Why though. I get it if someone gets off on a girl not enjoying it, but why not just do it oneself?

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Is this the right board to ask about flashlights? Thinking of getting one but don't know if I'd want a butt or a vag one. The butt one looks kind of uninteresting and the vag one looks rip your dick off extreme rough. Any one with experience who can help?
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>>
>>28905574
[SCHOOL SHOOTING INTENSIFIES

Totally original
>>
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>>28905624
Oh no normie i don't want to shoot up a school
I WANT NORMIE FUCKING GENOCIDE
STARTING WITH YOU AND I FUCKING HOPE
ILL BE THE ONE THAT FIRES THE SHOT THAT FUCKING ENDS YOU REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>28905711
Shut up, fucking autist. My friends and I are laughing at your edgy kid posts right now.
>>
>>28905056
got any more pics of this hottie ?
>>
>>28905776
>browsing 4chan with your friends
I can't imagine the group of losers u are

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Who here struggling looking for a job? It's been 6 months since I've been fired. Everyday I'm searching offers, I've made lots of interviews, and still nothing. Who else in a similar situation?

inb4
>only 6 months being unemployed. Try 10 years fucking normie
>unironically looking for a job. Kill yourself wagecuck
>>
I graduated high school last year and was rejected from every fast food and retail job I've applied for.

Unemployed for almost a year

>muh you're not trying hard enough
>>
>>28904224
>but people get jobs in a day
I hate being told this, and I want to know where this happens so I can go there.
>>
I'm almost 26 and the job I ever had I ended up having a panic attack and leaving. They called me to come back the next day but I was too embarrassed to go back to work.
>>
>>28903840
>tfw im going to quit a job i just got 6 months ago
feel like a scumbag, but its not like the company actually cares/appreciates me.
>>
I got a meme degree in liberal arts, and EVERY stereotype is true... except for the fact that employers won't hire you for min wage jobs because you're "overqualified." So now I'm too overqualified to be a wageslave and too underqualified for an entry level job

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Alright robots, this is something that I'll never forget. This just happened to me.

>be me, collegefag
>get woken up at 5am to my elderly neighbor, Ned, (not real name) yelling "some one help me!"
>go outside, Ned says that his partner needs help
>go inside his house, his boyfriend is clearly dead
>his blue eyes were open and his mouth was open
>that was an image that will remain burned in my memory forever
>checking for his non-existent heartbeat was one of the worst things that I've ever had to make myself do
>call 911 and paramedics show up
>sit with Ned as he cries
>Ned had a stroke six months ago, and the now-dead partner had been taking care of him
>Ned can barely stand up at times, but he has to walk for two hours a day in order to get over the effects of the stroke
>neither of them had any family or friends
>as social services are trying to get a funeral home out here to remove the body, Ned becomes constantly more and more disoriented

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>>
Growing old fucking sucks.
I'm actually terrifyed of not being able to wipe my own ass in some point in the future.
I should go full zyzz lifestyle and live as fast as I can and die without awarning.
The thing, my life isn't nearly as interesting to live fast.
>>
>>28905396
It was quite a shock to me. A living, breathing human being quickly turned into a white, cold hunk of flesh. Touching it was the weirdest thing I've ever done. His eyes were blue, yet misty because he was dead. The reminded me of a recent character that was hanged in Game of Thrones.
>>
>>28904356
Moral of the story: Don't be a fag
>>
I just turned 42. All I can say you are practically guaranteed to witness something like this when you get older. People get helpless and later they die.
>>
>>28904356
They where normies WHO GIVES A SHIT
HIS DEATH SHOULD BE CELEBRATED
im going to get a cake right now

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/ENOUGH/ GENERAL

TELL ME WHAT PISSES YOU OFF
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>>
>>28905475
That sub human normie scum still get to draw breath they all need to be extinguished
>>
Anti-feminists
>>
That my parents' neighbours all hate me and ignore me, as well as everyone else I've ever know, almost. I do deserve it all, but my neighbour is a security guard and has a gun at home, so I don't want these tensions to escalate into tragedy on some hot, drunken night.
>>
I have two retarded failed normie roommates, I'm forced to hear their meaningless, stupid conversations all day long
>>
>see guys who treat their girlfriends terribly
>know this guy who literally gets drunk and shouts at his girlfriend every time I've hung out with him
>she still sticks with him
>know plenty of guys who are just emotional abusive cunts who women refuse to leave for some reason
>there are countless women who refuse to leave a spouse that continually beats and rapes them
>it seems like every guy who mistreats women has an endless stream of vaginas to fuck
>meanwhile guys who just want a loving relationship cant get the time of fucking day


you deserve to get raped and beaten whores.

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I came on here asking for suicide advice. A lot of people said "think about what it'll do to your parents" and it made me feel a little guilty. So I thought I'd test the waters and make a playful suicide joke to my parents to see if they'd be open to the idea of me killing myself.

but now they're both really angry at me.
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>>
>>28905340
i slept in until noon yesterday, because i had nothing to do. and i was tired of sitting around all day doing nothing, so i went to bed at 9:00.

when i walked past my dad he said "so you were only awake for 9 hours today?" and i said "that's 9 too many haha"

He muted the TV and said "what does that mean?"

I said "I mean I was awake for too many hours."

He got really serious and angry and asked "What does that mean?"

"It might be better if I didn't wake up at all haha"

Then he called my mom in and told her what I said and they both yelled at me, then my mom started to cry. They cancelled the cruise they were going to go on because they think i'll kill myself if I'm left alone.
>>
>>28905600

Wow, they seem like shitty parents.
>>
>>28905600
LOL my dad would just laugh if I said that to him. He's kind of a cyborg though so he gets it.
>>
>>28905600
That was a terrible joke. Not even witty. It was more you hinting at suicide with a few laughs thrown in than a joke.
>>
>>28905782
thats the fucking point your normie cunt.

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Roll for your Disney waifu.
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>>
PLEASE NO NIGGERS
FUCK YOU BLACK PEOPLE YOU FAGGOTS
>>
>>28887841
I actually like all of them so I don't care what I roll
>>
>>28889210
triggered niggered detected the only woman worse than blacks are indians talk about POO IN THE LOO they are equally bad
>>
>>28887841
Elsa is god tier
>>
>>28905822
>wanted beautiful arian snow princess

>get the absolute WORST alternative


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