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/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.

1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.
2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.
3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.
4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.
5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).
6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text.
7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.
8. You cannot post a picture without text.
9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).
10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.
11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.
12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:
http://blag.xkcd.com/2008/01/14/robot9000-and-xkcd-signal-attacking-noise-in-chat/
>>
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.

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Where can I meet ugly women as an ugly guy? Why is it so hard?
>>
Even an ugly woman gets Chad these days

Who would end in your Death Note?
>assume there is only one
>>
one?

wait, a minute, can't you do crazy mind control things for a while?
i'd probably just write myself like
"and then anon went on to be the big success, golden child of the world, loved by all and dies comfortably of old age at 100 years but not before ushering in a new utopic age of prosperity and love"

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Time for the lads crazy manifesto edition
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>>
>go to buy fags at corner show
>how old are you mate
>18
>got any id?
>looks at id
>says here your 17
>no you fuck 1998 is 18
>you sure?

Im fucking sure mate.
>>
>>34189071

>Go to the casino with friends
>Security checks all of their IDs
>They just nod me through

I think they might be onto me about my gambling habit
>>
>>34189066
/shipfeel/ pilgrimage to Nottingham when?
>>
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>>34189071
>tfw i'd think the person would be 12 years old if they showed me a 1998 DOB ID
>>
>>34189123

I'm still saving for my pilgrimage to Isla Vista atm.

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ey habibi!

post your desktop

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>girls with tattoos

Why do girls intentionally ruin their bodies like this? I hate tattoos so much. If a girl has a tattoo anywhere on her body, I instadrop her.
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>>
i agree with you OP but i think if you loved a girl who had one for her personality then you would be willing to look past it

alot of people do impulsive shit that they end up regretting, so like dont judge them entirely off the fact they have some ugly ink on their body
>>
>>34189083
I suppose it's possible to change so completely over the years that you could go from the kind of girl who'd get a tattoo to the kind who wouldn't, but it doesn't seem likely. She'd have to be a REALLY fucking nice person.
>>
Idiot. Tattoos mean she puts out on the first date.
>>
>>34189083
If a decent amount of her body was covered I sure as fuck wouldn't. I might be able to look past a very small tattoo in a less visible area but tattoos are still degenerate.
>>
>>34189128
But they also mean she's incapable of love.

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Canada thread.
Upload your maple leafs. Complain about the weather. Post your city/area code (dial 613, ladies). Bore us with your life story.
>>
416 checking in
Came back here for school a week ago and already bored out of my mind
>>
416 checking in. Toronto. At university.

Put a gun in my mouth. I just increased dose on Anti-dep meds so the side-effects were hitting me pretty hard. Missed class all of last week cause I spent the entire week lying in bed, watching buffy the vampire slayer and playing Pokemon. Today is the first time all week I left my room and ate something besides cup noodles. And let me tell you, it sucks 18 dicks in a row. The sunlight is burning my eyes, social immersion is crippling, and I'm knee-deep in work.

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ask a friendless black girl hanging out alone at a maid cafe anything
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>>
>>34187222
Most right that looks like he wants to die.
Cool shirt though
>>
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>>34185683
im a black grill weeb, do you wanna be friends op?
>>
>>34185683
>>34188190
FUCKING ROASTIEEEEEEEEEEES GET OFF MY BOAAAAAAARD REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE CAN NOT BE ROBOTS
WOMEN CAN NOT BE ROBOTS
BLACK ((((PEOPLE)))) CAN NOT BE ROBOTS

go to reddit or soc and stop shitting up this board
>>
Does your first name start with O?
>>
>>34187295
>>34187317
>>34187363
>>34188124

No, but you guys are right about him wanting to die

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>girl got off with my 4.5 incher
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>>
>>34188784
brushing people off as a "normie" is distasteful.
and no, I'm not here to give advice
>>
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>>34188935
like this, and sometimes planking on top too
>>
>>34188950
not all girls can get laid, dummy, also, if you can't get laid, then learn more about sexual economics and try to fit in the rung that allows you to get tail
>>
>>34188784
>implying this isn't an echo chamber
t. my opinions are totally mine and I arrived at them by self
>>
>>34189022
Interesting. Did you go slow and deep, or fast and shallow? Or a mix of both?
How long til she came?

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When did you realize you were abnormal or set out from the pack? This is a photo of me taken by my mother, I am 20 years old. I don't belong.
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>>
Wait, is OP beastman?
>>
>>34186498
Post your feet and your dick.
>>
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>Have company over after date
>She think its weird my apartment is empty and cold
>Exercise mat and stuff in living room
>"Well I spend most of my time on the computer, so I only heat one room, my room"
>sees kitchen, ask why I don't have a microwave
>tell her it leads to bad eating habits
>Sees my room is just an exercise ball as a chair in front of desk, with computer and a bed
>She nopes the fuck out of there and I never hear from her again

I knew I was odd but not "serial killer weirdo" odd. I was saddened by this as well, I went on 5 dates with her and she was really wanting to come over. I seriously considered buying a couch, tv and netflix just to appear "normal". I erroneously thought that would be weird and I should "be myself"
>>
>>34189061
I don't really see why one would need a TV. I've got a 23" monitor at home and its good enough for all my movie watching needs.
>>
>>34189061
Nigga buy a chair

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>walking in the woods with my dog
>people up ahead of me on trail, about 25m
>the trail goes way down and then back up to a small clearing
>they reached the clearing ahead of me and I was down in the valley, headed up the hill, so I couldn't see them
>reach top of hill and I'm confronted with a side view of a guy fucking the woman (both early 20s) from behind as she's bent over with shirt still on
>immediately turned around and walked back where I came from
>they laughed and kept fucking, I assumed. Definitely planned for me to see since they knew I was behind them.
She was hot, like maybe 8.5-9/10 brunette
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>>
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>>34186924
Should have asked her to let you sit in the corner and let you and masturbate like a fucking cuck!
>>
Does hearing them have sex count? This was last saturday
>10 am
>sleeping
>wake up to loud sex noises of my neighbours
>mostly just a female voice repeatedly screaming "Yes!", "Oh baby!" and "Fuck yeah"
>towards the end hear what I presume was the guy slapping her ass
I normally don't mind hearing them fuck since they only do it like once a week and its usually when I'm wearing my headphones so I don't even notice it, but its sorta annoying when you're trying to sleep.
>>
>>34186924
>>34186890
I don't see why you're surprised about the incesty vibes your cousin is giving off. You live in a rural area in the US of A
>>
>>34185074
>this is voyeurism not cuckoldry

I know how you feel man. So many people just don't know what real cucking is these days, just like to throw the word around.

So what if I like to watch multiple men have sex with my gf? So what if they happen to have big dicks? So what if some of them occasionally happen to be black? That doesn't make it cuckolding.
>>
>>34183765
Should have grabbed a large rock and beaten Chad over the head with it before raping that slut.

Then the joke would be on them.

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>tfw you look in the mirror after a heavy and hot erp session
>tfw you realize you're not really a woman, but just a gay man

How do I make this feel go away? It is wrong, right?
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>>
DETLETE THIS @_@
>>
>>34188856
You sound mentally ill faggot
>>
>>34189077
I am, I won't deny this.
>>
>>34189037
I know the feels but if you actually wanted to be a women its the best that can be done at this point in time. No problem anon good luck with whatever you decide to do.
>>
>>34188747
where do you go for erping?

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Pol thinks we all should have kids for the white race

Why is /pol/ so cucked ?
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>>
>>34188881
>deadbeat fathers, welfare use, divorce, child support/alimony, broken households and mental illness among whites.

Better than extinction.
Where's your brain? You wouldn'wouldn't be here today if you had cucked, complacent ancestors that decided "It's better to make ultra-efficient spears, hunt enough for ourselves, and relax all the time, caveman bros."
>>
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>>34188996
>It's better to make ultra-efficient spears

kek'd
>>
There are nearly eight billion people living on this planet and it can't support a population that big. Why are people so worried about birth rates going up when they should be dialing it back a bit? If anything, there should be 2-3 billion people max.
>>
>>34189068
S P A C E M I N I N G
>>
>>34189100

Humanity will never live in space. We'll never colonize the moon or Mars, much less the rest of the galaxy. It's scientifically impossible.

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I am sick of life, i have decided to let my fate be decided by kek almighty

I have some stabbing weapons, a knife and a loaded flintlock pistol (don't even ask, my family are a bunch lf weird rednecks)

What should i do? Dubs decide
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>>
>>34189088
jesus fuck
good luck OP
>>
>>34189088
Well fair is fair
I will use the knife, not going to stab my dick tho
I will slit my wrists instead
>>
>>34189088
>says he's sick of life
>won't do it
>>
>>34189088
>>34189099
Kek REALLY wills it
>>
>>34189118
dead thread already. abandon ship m80s

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how the fuck do i get my hair cut

do i just go into a great clips or somewhere and say "yeah cut it short but not that short"? also where/when do i tip since i'm an amerifag?
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>>
>>34189016
>hair paste

???

Specific product please
>>
Is it alright if I say I want my hair cut finger length?
>>
>>34188672
true robots cut their own hair
>>
>>34189092
probably better to measure 'finger length' and ask for that instead
>>
>>34189067
I use "got2b phenomenal something", it literally changed my life.


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