/r9k/ is an imageboard where there are no exact reposts.1. If you attempt to post something unoriginal, it is not posted, and you are muted temporarily.2. The time with which you are muted for doubles with each transgression.3. Each mute time is 2^n in seconds where n is the number of times you have transgressed. So, your mute time doubles each time you fuck up.4. Backlinks, eg >>1, are not viewed by the robot. So "lolwut" and ">>2 lolwut" are the same post, in the eyes of the robot.5. Gibberish at the end of a post to force originality may result in mod intervention (no BLOX posts please).6. Images are NOT included in the filter, only text. 7. Your mute count slowly decreases over time.8. You cannot post a picture without text.9. Unicode is blocked. Sorry, too many exploits (Cyrillic letters, etc).10. Posts require a certain minimum amount of original content in order to be posted.11. Post sane, real content, well thought out replies, and mutes are unlikely.12. The original algorithm was designed by XKCD:http://blag.xkcd.com/2008/01/14/robot9000-and-xkcd-signal-attacking-noise-in-chat/
/r9k/ has no topic, but unlike /b/ Global Rule #3 is in effect. In addition, advice threads and camwhoring/hookup/"rate me" threads should go on /adv/ - Advice and /soc/ - Cams & Meetups respectively.
Cant we all just be comfy & get along edition
>>27482075>en-suite>visit parentsI think you need to go
>>27482089Don't worry mate. I'm at uni, it's just one room and the en-suite but have officially been kicked out. I'm 'visiting' as far as my parents know. I'm actually going home for good to tell them I got kicked out.Don't know what to do now. Look for a job? Bennies?
>>27472192My mate goes there. Plays pool for them.
>>27480764>thinks spar have a delivery of fresh sandwiches dailyThey were probablly made 5 days ago by a Slovenian in a factory.
>>27480005Only handguns and assault rifles. You could get a shotgun, basically a 99.999999% chance it will kill you instantly.I don't say 100% because there's always that one useless cunt who ends up bottling it halfway through and blows his face off
Post your favorite books / PDF links.My favorite collection is here.https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=%77%68%65%72%65%20%63%61%6e%20%49%20%64%6f%77%6e%6c%6f%61%64%20%63%68%69%6c%64%20%70%6f%72%6e%20%61%6e%64%20%68%6f%77%20%63%61%6e%20%49%20%6b%69%6c%6c%20%74%68%65%20%70%72%65%73%69%64%65%6e%74
i like the one where it says australia is a constitutional monarchy
You got me. I wonder if anything will happen, I'll assume not.
This isn't /b/ you underage edgy cunt.
>>27482979How many times are you going to try this tonight?
actually really good list, susprised for r9k.
Why are Asian women so disloyal towards their own race?
>>27483456You've obviously never dealt with anyone who learned English as a second language. Theres plenty of people who can crush the test that have absolutely shit ability at actually communicating in the language
>>27483465but i've been talking to her on the phone for hours every night since september familia
>>27475698we should purge all race traitors whether they be black, asian, white or middle eastern
>>27483488>>Things white peopIe say when they are fucking no one
>>27483402This is cute. I had a long distance virgin Asian gf for 6 years once. We bonded over how her father was a mob boss in Indonesia, while mine was an unlicensed doctor who illegally performed abortions in the USSR. We ended up seeing each other every few months at one point.Eventually she left me which resulted in crippling abandonment issues because I had absolutely zero other warm bonds with anyone and getting cheated on twice since then hasn't helped
>that feel when you're crying because she isn't real again
>>27482996i cant believe you could actually give me this shit with a straight face. you know nothing, take your "advice" to facebook please.
>tfw my VN waifu isn't real eitherI just want someone loyal who'll never judge me ;_;
>>27483060Why, it worked for me
>>27482996You are aware that the userbase here is the people who tried this and never had success, right?
>>27483156You just gotta show confidence man, girls love confident guys
Who /secretly gay/ here?
I kinda dislike gays, if it weren't for them, aids wouldn't have been created and they wouldn't have infected other people. So yeah.. : /
>>27483493>So yeah.. : /faggot
>>27481920>Publically humiliates mewhy do people do this
>tfw girlfriend but want to crossdress and suck cock I would if I didn't feel bad about cheating
>>27483493No niggers did by having sex like animals
Post your feels and how your life is going
Be 10/10 asian, smash white pussy all day everyday
Bump, currently trying to find an office job. Last week I went to an interview and the instead of offering me a job in an office, which is why I was there, they offered me a job doing landscaping. I was really embarrassed, pham.
>>27483057yeaaaaa get em tiger!
I HATE when i'm watching washington journal on cspan in the morning and another black person calls in. I go on high alert and start hoping and wishing they put together a cogent sentence or two (seeing as they're voluntarily planning to speak on cspan.) Oftentimes they do not and im left with only the wishful thought that it may have been a prank or joke just poking fun of a black people stereotype. I don't want to live like this.
>>27482462life is not going good, I have entry test for unis coming in june/july after being a NEET for 5 years. My parents hate me now and they have told me that if I fail to get into any uni this year they will force me to go to any oil rig and do hard labour while in reality I'm 5'9" and 52 kgs
Why haven't you taken the MGTOW pill?No more >tfw no gf, no more anxiety around women, no more worrying about living up to expectations that were never even your own to begin withIt's the path of enlightenment for fellow robots
I want romantic companionship with a woman again, but it feels hard to find now that I'm 30, and I'm afraid of being hurt again.I still believe romantic love is out there though, and the only way you don't find it for certain is if you give up.Good luck to you other anons looking for love.
>>27479257yugi is more fun cause it does not have a passage of time concept. It allows wierder plays.>taking the bait
>>27479902Good luck to you as well bloxbloz
>>27478980rationalizing most women is harder, though
>>27479879When the black community starts dressing up in trashbags like>>27479312maybe you can call them MGTOWs, but until then, no one needs to take "the MGTOW pill" in order to be happy as a bachelor.
What's her/his name, robot? I feel pathetic for having a Oneitis, I don't want to go on, but I've convinced myself being with her was the only way to live and now she's gone, because I told her to go, I'm fuckign stupid,Post oneitis name and story.
Anja.Now she is internet dating some British fuckhead. He comments creeper-status shit on every post she makes.No, Anja, you didn't love me, and fuck you for lying.
Kristiane>be me >at my fave bar, had a lot to drink already>she walks up to me>'hey there, how are you'>talk a bit, getting flirty, tell her i have huge dick>she's looking towards my crotch all the time>she's wasted as fuck>i tell her if she gives me a bj on the toilet i pay her tab>'fuck yeah let's go'>go to women toilet>sit down, unwrap it>'holy fuck anon, you didn't lie, it's really huge'>tries to swallow it wholeComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>27482331why do they do this. baka senpai.
>>27483252here's another oneTina>go out with my friends in the city (about 40 minutes from home)>decide i don't want to drive home, look for a sleepover place and a hole to fill>targetacquired.jpg>'hey there, how's it going'>'oh hi, i noticed you already, you're not from here, right?'>keep talking for a few hours, buy her some drinks to get her in the mood. >get a bit touchy around her waist, squeeze her ass>'mhh i like where this is going, wanna go over to my place?'>'sure, why not'>tell my friends to pick me up tomorrowComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>27483398last one for now??? + ???>be me, 18 yo>at a huge festival, just watching Hatebreed at the mainstage>fuck yeah shit's crazy>having a couple of beers with my dudes>2 chicks are eyeing me from across the bar>i wanna put my dick in there>go over to them, chat em up>'wow anon that's some nice ink, where are you from?'>proceed to talk with them and have a few more beers>getting hammered alreadyComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
How exactly do women have life on easy mode when getting a bf and having sex will only make their lives worse?
>>27483420>woman baiting for attention>gets a foot up her arseNothing wrong with that pic. Sorry you don't get it.
>>27483432>9gag >REEEEEEEEE FUCK OFF NORMIE
>>27483460This, OP is one dumb fucking fat bitch. It's true when they say women have the mentality of a child.
>>27483412Not our fault that women are horrible at judging character. ultimately you get used because you want to be.
>>27483452Except it isnt http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2394562/Extended female sexuality can be observed in many primate species. Its literally the only reason why females would not advertise fertility and ovulation is hidden.Cant cuck providers when they can tell the fertile from the infertile phase.
to day food helb hebler camefood:5 pottattoes2 tomatoses1 onanionmiklketscupand broilerit wwas guod
i comme home ffrom sbase and here arre peoble cheerring and hurraaign
WH3R3 7HH3 FUCHK 15 H3LB H3LB3RH3LP H33LLBB H333LLBE33RRHH
>>274834707H3Y 4R3 H4PPY B3C4U5E 1 D0N7H N33D T0 B3 4P0N3 0N MY R1D3H 4G41N
>>27483476>>27483288>>27483262>>27483235>>27483140hahahaha ha weeeeew lad
I really hate these gray dinosaur people
tfw no big black cock bf )':
>tfw no cute aus femboy to grind against my cock and beg for it
>>27482395Same reason girls come here all the time.Because attention.
>>27480212>tfw have a girlfriend but want to dress like a trap and go out and have gay sex Damn shame I love her too much to cheat but goddam am I tempted to
>>27480285>>27480740>no contact infoIt's like people want to be alone
>>27483410Maybe they really do want to be alone or not with a robot ;_;
Is it realistic to be looking for a girl who does not use social media in this day and age?
Bump because I hate niggers
>>27481596How did you meet her? Original comment.
I WISH FOR THIS EVERYDAYA girl who doesn't need that petty shit. Fucked a girl back when who didn't have any SM. She was mental but her pussy was hellfire.
>>27481125Yes, but you will have to get out of mom's basement to find one. There's shitloads of people out there who still refuse to choke on Zuckercock. My gf and I don't even have smartphones.
Probably not.I worked with a girl in Uni who was practically stallman-tier. She was into weird shit as well.She would've been easily a 7-8.I got an XMPP and a landline number from her before she dropped out, but I'd never have the balls to call her though.She was the only girl which made me spaghetti in her presence.
what does /r9k/ think of Steve Harvey's advice on picking up women?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iizqu9FpRkM
>>27483433let me guess, you're 6'8 and making 400k a year too?
>>27483458No I just wasn't a complete loser in high school that was afraid to talk to girls. I also really enjoy chasing after girls
>>27483275>t. autist underage who thinks whores are the normkys
>>27482937>git dat>git dat gurl>git dat monehtypical
>>27483504>underage autist that thinks anyone having sex besides them is bad
who /vigilante/ here
>>27483444>boots are supposed to be cleanwow look at the prima donna
>>27483463the one on the left wrecks a bidet
>>27483379Who do you go after OP?
>>27483496nail biters
>>27483463your mama does