I feel hopeless writing this, but needed somewhere to vent. For the record i am diagnosed with autism and ocd. For a while i have been getting fucked up thoughts to look illegal things on the internet. My obsessive compulsive searching did get better of me, I had sites closed down and told myself i would never go back and do that again. I was getting no enjoyment, but can’t explain what i did. Still get fucked up thoughts. I put a blocker on my devices to try help.I know the difference between right and wrong, i hate myself as it is.. I have met a psychiatrist recently and now been referred for cbt. I wish the thoughts would stop. I try keep busy and all that. I wish i had a normal brain like everyone else. I'm living a nightmare.
>>34552419Try to get a prescription for welbutrin and low dose naltrexone, they are good medicines for treating neurological disorders linked to organisation problems like depression, ADHD or addiction. Also get some kind of life coach
>>34552419u don't sound like a bad person, it seems like you know the difference between right and wrong, u are just a victim of your own mind.try meditation, or listening to music loud enough to melt away any thought in ur head, or whatever else you can find to drown ur mind in.good luck anon, dont beat yourself up too bad, you sound like you're doing your best in a difficult situation!
