Don't have sex before marriage.

have sex before marriage and put a baby in her so she has to marry you

>>34573203
don't get them pregnant and don't have any actual deep feelings for them.

>>34573250
gay

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make sure to slap her around, hold her shoulders, shake her and stop her from moving and even span kher (not in a sexy way)
they need that for their brain to function properly, otherwise they will engage in self-destructive behavior
don't feel bad about it

>>34573203
>Advice for dating BPD and mentally ill woman?
Don't.

Borderline personality disorder can be healed through unconditional loving relationship over many years. Usually they never get that, and just have short term relationships that exacerbate and further cement the issue. That's why it is important to have a relationship without sex. You can see each other's character more clearly and love each other more sincerely without the fog of lust. She's not going to be able to manipulate you with sex, and if you have to exit it's more ethical.

>>34573203
Please tell me she has a penis.

>>34573239
>Marry a BPD woman
Why would you tell him to do that? Lol

>>34573203
I do understand the temptation, since it both scratches the 'I can fix her' itch and they usually will shower you with quite a lot of love and affection for a in cycles, but I advise against it. It's just not worth it man.
After a while they can unexplainably get angry with you, break your stuff, call you names, get depressed, cry, threaten divorce, nothing you say or do will have any effect, and then after a while and on their own they shift back to being lovable, saying they're sorry, that they love you, and then later they shift again, so on and so forth. It takes a heavy toll on one's mind.

It's not that they are bad and evil or anything like that, it's just that it is usually a tough condition if left untreated and uncontrolled, for both her, you, and your kids if you end up having them together. Like I said, I do feel sorry, but it's very tough.

>>34573506
this anon
>>34573280
is correct, the problem with BPD women is not them but the men they date

you just have to get physical with them... when their minds are going out of control and they are overwhelmed with emotion, you just gotta smack them across the face once to reset their brains, or choke them during sex or whatever

Marry her and impregnate her as soon as possible. Being pregnant stabilizes their moods. Times will be good. Once all the children are born, treat her poorly - gradually worse and especially do to them what they do to you, just a little bit worse. Hopefully she snaps and does something crazy. Divorce her, get the kids.

This is where you then find a new wife, a younger model. That's the one you keep for life. Unless you're a maniac and try for a 3rd. Just be thankful for what you have.

>>34573739
Why not go for the model in the first olace instead of making her your stepwive?

>>34573838
this

>>34573203
Date a western Vtuber

Did once.
Bad.....

She tried to kill me multiples times for months.
She lied to me about everything constantly.
Think of every negative thing about a person and apply it to this woman.
That was her.

What I did was always just say things like I was sorry and mnetally give me in defendeing myself mentally and physically from her. BAD SHIT MAN....

Okay so really.....don't....even....bother....

>>34573941
How was the sex

I remember dating one before. She was 33, goth chick because of course, and was super beautiful and I genuinely haven't felt that level of love for me for quite a while and I felt the same for her. She was a difficult woman though when it came out, never violent but definitely flip flopped a lot. The only reason I ended things was she tried to baby trap me about 5 months in. Miss her terribly, she'd call me her good boy and get me to call her mommy during sex. Should I text her anons?

Honestly, just don't. If it's untreated, it'll only wear you down.

And do not listen to those idiots, who are telling you to put a baby in her. That is the WORST thing you can do not only for yourself (all of a sudden, you have to pay alimony, if she divorces on a whim) but for the children, too, which are going to grow up without a father and with an unpredictable mother. It'll fuck them up and they'll curse you.

>>34573203
You think you want them because they embody the kind of unbridled, submissive, free-use sexuality that nearly all straight men fetishize, and better-adjusted women scorn.
They know exactly what men want. and when. When they are working you, they will make you feel like the most powerful man on Earth.
You might overlook the fact that she cries whenever she has to decide where to eat, that she openly hates the woman who raised you, and that she just keeps smoking all your stash while you're away earning the money that paid for it.
It's not until you're forbidden from speaking to any of your friends, stepping out the house to attend a hobby, having a passcode on your phone that the first signs of doubt creep in.
However, the true knell comes when the BPD girl realises that you no longer have a viable escape route. Watch as that carnal sex, the sex that made you overlook all the other stuff dries up like the dammed Nile, and you're left with a solipsistic mental patient who wholly expects you to provide for them, clean up after them, listen to all of their schizoaffective nonsense and be their buffer between the outside world and them.
Don't dare express any annoyance over this or try to draw boundaries, because remember all that consensual sex you thought you had?
It was all rape, mate. And they'll believe her. And she'll believe her.

>>34573203
Don’t. Fucking retard, they’re obviously always bad news. Maybe the anons saying that slapping them around a bit could keep them level are right but I think that’s a massive risk if you live in the west given the way our society treats men vs women nowadays, you can definitely only get away with that reliably during sex which is not where you’ll be experiencing the worst of their issues. The people telling you to impregnate a bpdemon are either retards or bpdemons themselves trying to trap you, pregnancy does not fix personalities and it makes a lot of women worse. You need to find a woman who’s nice and compatible with you in your regular life, not one who fulfils your gooner fantasies

>>34573971
Why didn't you want any kids with her?

It's always amusing to read the BPD threads. So weird that so many anons have so much experience with them. Lmao

Don't. Like other anons, I've had one such experience and it was a bad one. She will become abusive, scream and shout at you, and blame you for everything bad that's happened in your life. And she will lie a lot. And once her meltdown is gone she will be suddenly normal again as if she hadn't just spent the last 30 minutes screaming at you.

>>34574038
Most men who go outside have either dated one or have friends that dated one, they aren’t rare.

>>34574038
They seem to prey on us awkward lonely types. Easy targets. They have an unquenchable thirst for the validation we're longing to give. Genuinely the most dangerous type of woman. Damn near 100% chance they'll cheat too.

>>34573203
Dating mentally ill women is fine but there is one exception and that is cluster B personality disorders. Do not even attempt. There is nothing redeeming about them, they're just psychos. Meds won't help. They will drain you of your life energy, leaving you a hollow, soulless, shell of who you used to be.

>>34574038
I was friends with one throughout my teenage years with whom I shared a large house with a bunch of other mutual friends.
I did not become involved with her, but I watched with interest as she ruined the lives of a half dozen men, and did so seemingly with great pleasure.
Weird thing was, she was actually fun to hang out with and not overbearing at all in a platonic setting, it was just as soon as she'd had a dicking she seemed to display this pathological need to psychologically ruin the man in question.
I remember one time she was pondering aloud whether she had been raped the night before, and I had to tell her
>I was sitting on the couch gaming, and you physically dragged this man home from the bar, sat on his lap on the couch grinding on him for an hour and a half all the while attempting to bargain with me for the half gram of coke you know I still have from last weekend, which when I refused to give you you stomped off to your room and took your frustration out on this cunt. If anything, you fucking raped him.
to which the response was basically
>Tee-hee, maybe you're right.
I swear, this woman was on the verge of hysterical tears two minutes before banging on about being taken advantage of. I've never seen anything like it tbqh

I’m a man and my psychiatrist suspects I have bpd. I read these stories here and can’t really relate. Maybe I’m the quiet, self-aware type. I’m anxious and depressed more than anything, and incredibly lonely. I have very low self-esteem.

>>34573971
Can I have her number?

>>34574140
I know one man diagnosed with BPD, and he has the worst victim complex I have ever witnessed.
A neotenic waif of a man. He asked me for some help preparing a wall in his living room for paint, so I lent him my orbital sander and a sleeve of paper.
He was legitimately offended that I merely provided equipment and wasn't going to do it for him.
>Can you at least show me how to do it.
>Sure, you squeeze the trigger and press it into the wall, like this. When it's smooth to the touch, it's ready for paint. If the paper splits, cut off a square from the reel and clamp it to the sander.
>I can't do that
>Why?
>I don't have a Dad to teach me this stuff
>Seriously, man, I've just told you everything you need to know. All you're doing is sanding this plaster back far enough to clean off the wallpaper paste remnants. Just press the thing into the wall and move it around until the whole room is equally smooth. That's all there is to it. You can't damage anything or make anything worse.
>I can't do that at all, and I can't afford someone to pay a decorator to come and do it.
>I know that you want me to do it for you, but I have work in half an hour and afterwards I have to go and attend to my family. I don't have time to do this.
>Oh, just take your tools and stuff, then. I won't need them.
That is my experience with male BPD.

>>34574154
Well, I used to be an auto mechanic so I can’t relate to that guy either.

>>34574125
>They seem to prey on us awkward lonely types.
The only time I "dated" a BPDemon (1 date) was when I cold approached her and I don't think she wanted to meet me because I was lonely and awkward, in fact the lonely part turned her off so I learned to lie to girls about having no friends.

>>34574140
It varies man. I may have it too, I feel similar to you, and that's one of the things that worry me, the relationships.
I'm almost always sad and anxious and have low self-steem, but my mood swings too frequently.
At some times I am hyped and excited, but sometimes at the slightest event (or sometimes for nothing at all) I just get down in the dumps, or get annoyed and stressed easily, etc.

I think all of that makes it hard for men to have a relationship as well, specially since most women expect the men to be more stoic/staunch. BPD women are usually more tolerated because it is more acceptable for women to be emotional than men.

I'm talking to an 18 year old that I'm pretty sure its a bpd demon. She's lovebombing me and wants to get married and have kids ASAP. She's a virgin and Christian raised so I can't tell if she's just inexperienced and wants to be a nice stay at home mom or is a psycho. We vibe really well mentally but I've seen some red flags.

>>34574422
>I've seen some red flags.
Like what?

>>34574385
Yeah, it sucks as a man. Women want to feel secure. Hard to do that when you feel like chaos inside. I’m starting DBT group therapy soon.

>>34573506
>they can unexplainably get angry with you
lmao autists out here thinking all women have bpd because they can't read social cues

>>34574686
>as a man
>doomed
do you have suicidal thoughts btw?

>>34573203
I don't care if she's mentally ill. As long as she's loyal, not a cheater, and doesn't text other guys on the internet in my face all day she's good. Mentally ill girls got that fye.

>>34574731
You clearly don't have experience with BPD. They blow things out of proportion. And it's not like it gets resolved quickly, either.
It can be due to something small, yet they might cry, blame you, call you names, threaten, and then days later they'll apologize and say of their own volition it was their fault, that they're messed up, that they love you, etc. etc.

Like I said, I'm not saying that they are bad people, but it is clearly a condition that isn't that easy to handle. Relationships are supposed to make you feel good, not miserable.

>>34574731
Found the kissless virgin neet.

>>34574941
>something small
it's still something retard. and a lot of the time it's not even small, it's just something the autist moid perceives as small because they can't conceptualize anything outside of their own subjective experience. or it's a small thing that's built up over time into a big thing because the autist can't catch annoyance cues

>>34574966
>namecalling for no reason
Its still something small and that does not warrant a fight, crying, silent treatment, threats, aggression, etc.
An IRL example:
>day is going great, both are having fun, smiling, joking around, hugs, kisses, etc.
>decide to go out together
>try to park the car, but the place is completely full
>drop her at the front of the place, say that you'll look for a spot to park farther on
>takes a few minutes to find
>go back (on foot) to her, she is pissed that you made her wait
>you try to talk to her, apologize, say that it was hard to find a spot, that you had to walk all the way
>goes silent, doesn't want to talk
>rest of the day ruined
>couple of days later apologizes crying saying that it was her fault etc. etc.

What are you supposed to do? I get that waiting is annoying, but in no way was it done to harm her, it was just so that she didn't have to walk all the way to the front of the place since the car was parked in a bit of a distant, potentially dangerous spot.

>>34574958
>>34574960

lol

>>34574140
I’m a woman who got diagnosed with BPD several years ago and was fed meds till I refused them. I was in a horrible situation with an abusive avoidant. I never threatened anyone’s life, I never self harmed, I’ve always been working on my career regardless of the many bumps and obstacles, I keep a stable job, I’ve never attempted, I’ve never done drugs, I drink socially, I smoked/vaped for 2 years and have been clean since 2023. I have a decent reliable friend group and a couple personal goals I’ve reached. I’m social, extroverted, have hobbies, keep myself very healthy and do exercise regularly. Regardless of all this, I was still diagnosed BPD. At this point I think they give it out for free to almost anyone who isn’t willing to take shit from others instead of playing victim. Yea people have been violent to me first and I responded with anger/violence. Never really started it myself. The last year my psychologist who’s been seeing me for the last 2-3 years says she doesn’t believe I have that diagnosis at all. And I believe her because I’m not harmful and I don’t think those who I love will randomly abandon me. Even if they do, I know for certain it will be okay. So at this point if you are like me and have a personality disorder that doesn’t seem right I’d ask for a reevaluation.

>>34575306
I'm going to be honest, you sound like a big pussy.

>>34573203
Don't.

>>34575322
That’s your opinion, and I think it’s better than being described as a BPD crazy woman yea

>>34573203
Stay patient and kind to her, people with BPD often may take things wrong quickly, and stay composed when she breaks down or gets awfully aggressive.

just be patient with her. and actually love her, dont lead her on if you think thats going to do anything. or simply just dont date women youre not ready for. as long as youre empathetic, thats all that matters

>>34575407
W for not getting emotional, but that's what i mean you are just a shut in coward.

>>34575306
Yeah, doesn’t sound like you have bpd. Otherwise you’d be chronically anxious, depressed, empty, and obsessive. I’ve never attempted either, but I do self-harm via smoking and drinking.

>>34575420
I think this is key. If you yourself are defensive, despondent, avoidant then there's no compatibility

>>34573203
Self diagnosed BPD women are just immature and want to think they're special for no reason.
Actual diagnosed BPD women are a hellish roller coaster. Don't get attached. The hot/cold swings are not something human beings are meant to deal with in a partner. You will fuck yourself up and waste years of your life.

>>34573203
Don’t fall for their shit tests, they are innumerable

>>34575026
>What are you supposed to do?
Dump the bitch and get with a girl that doesn't suffer from a personality disorder? Sounds like a waste of time and like a huge load to carry, you're basically being her boyfriend/therapist so you can have access to a hole in between her legs. If I have to walk around eggshells because I might set the bitch off, she's not worth the time or the effort.

>>34576791
>The hot/cold swings are not something human beings are meant to deal with in a partner. You will fuck yourself up and waste years of your life.
This sums what I said before.
The hot part is pleasant and awesome, you feel quite loved, but the cold is terrible, even more so because the shifts often have no predictable rhyme or reason to it.
Either way, it wears your mind down. You think you're doing good, and the next thing you know everything is exploding.

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>>34573203
I don't really have any advice to give you but I do have a fun story to tell of a bpd girl I used to work with.

When I met her I ignored her attempts at talking to me, then after she started ignoring me, I flirted with her a little bit, then after she started flirting back a week later I started ignoring her again. Of course she ended up hating me hard, we played mind games on one another for a good year or two while we worked together, and I don't have the space to tell you the full details but we fucked with each other a lot, it involved a lot of the hot and cold bullshit and also physical violence on her part, and I know I was affecting her big time since the day one of my coworkers at the time told me that she flipped out when he was complaining about me to her so hard that it took him and another coworker aback by the sheer emotional intensity she displayed.

Eventually she moved to another location but strangely enough a couple of months later her best friend just happens to start working at the same location I work at, and that same BPD girl picks her up every now and then, and her bestie seems to track my movements since one day I exit the restroom and she immediately peeks over the wall to look at me walking back to work. Maybe I'm wrong and it's all a coincidence, but she's good at being ambiguous.

And before you ask me why I put up with it, I'll tell you right now; because it's fun. At least I think so, I love the high intensity drama and all that crazy mind games, but I have ADHD and get bored very easily so that could also explain it.

>>34576929
>And before you ask me why I put up with it, I'll tell you right now; because it's fun.
Understandable. For better or worse it certainly is quite emotionally intensive, but it just isn't worth it for long term relationships, which makes it a problem for some, because they don't like to go into relationships expecting it to be temporary.
Sucks to invest emotionally in something just for it to be frustrated later on, specially because it usually starts so passionately.

>>34574422
>wants to be a nice stay at home mom or is a psycho
Maybe she just wants to escape her parents and that seems like the only way

>>34575473
I don't get it, do you want her to lash out at everybody?

>>34576929
I don't get it, did you fuck her or not? Did she physically hurt you? Is this all juat a brag?

>>34577165
No I didn't fuck her, even though she flirted with me every now and then, but I knew it'd be a bad idea to pursue a serious or even a sexual relationship with her. She didn't hurt me per say but she did physically hit me, once when I was standing behind her she grabbed a bag and purposefully hit me near the groin as she was trying to open the bag, she looked back and said in a very sarcastic and cynical way that she was sorry, another time she dropped some plastic containers on my head when she was reaching up above me.
>Is this all just a brag?
Yes and no. I had fun doing it, but naturally, it's a waste of time. Not that I wasn't hitting on other girls there, but maybe I could have focused that energy onto something more productive.

>>34575306
This is why psychiatrists fail to diagnose BPD, because their patients are liars that never really believe that they did something wrong and that everyone else always started it, just like you.

Just take your meds

>>34573998
What this guy said, word for word. Wish I'd known this going in. I wouldn't have not done it, I learn things the hard way. But it would've made navigating it feel less like blindly running around in a dark room bumping into every sharp thing in it

>>34573320
Sorry but you are a fool. BPD women will always seek intimacy by fucking every man that will fuck her. No amount of unconditional love from one sad sap will stop her quest. It may be ok for awhile and she knows her pattern but all it takes is for a man to tell her she is pretty and her panties drop.

>>34573320
> Usually they never get that, and just have short term relationships that exacerbate and further cement the issue.
This is their own fault. The ones that get long term unconditional love put in the work to recover from their condition to allow that to happen
> without sex
You’re a cuck

>>34574422
>She's a virgin
no she isn't. Some family member or friend done cracked that

>>34577175
Yeah sounds wasteful
Thanks for sharing though

>>34577411
You mean normal women won't drop their panties when I tell thrm they're pretty?

>>34577429
Most single normal women take more effort. My experience. Married women are just as easy to fuck as BPD women especially if she has kids.

>>34577436
>Married women are just as easy to fuck as BPD women especially if she has kids.
Lol this but with a divorced mother. I didn't fuck her of course because she was my coworker but still

>>34573203
Realise that some things extremely triggers / hurts her that you think are harmless, try to avoid that and if you do it make everything in you power to make up for it.

>>34574113
And good luck breaking up peacefully if she’s the cyberstalking type