my gf and i havent seen each other for months, now we are together irl again. our sex is awful. we will be getting into it and then she will make an excuse to check her phone, or suddenly shell say 'i dont wanna have sex' and get out of it, or do some fake porn noises or fake porn face or whatever and then get me hard and laugh and say she doesnt want sex.if we do start having sex, she often says she doesnt wanna have sex a few minutes into it, or she will masturbate herself and 'cum' (fake or not idk) and say we should stop and it is selfish i wanna cum too because we shouldnt have sex when she doesnt want to. last year she said i am not her master, so i cant dominate her in bed. ive only cum with her hands free once. she wont even let me touch her face and when i do she screams 'my makeup!'. she does these fake porn noises and faces during sex which are really annoying. one time she asked me to grab her boobs really hard and when i did she started sobbing. once i was fucking her and close to cumming and she said she wanted to stop but i kept going cus i wanted to cum and then she had some sort of mental breakdown, that was the last time we had sex, in january. sex cant feel good or intimate with her, it feels like a pain in the ass and i dread it, it is stressful and there is no harmony between us and our bodies and i cant relax, like i can with the other girls i have been with. cont, 1/2
>>34580510cont, 2/2before you say 'its your fault, you are the one bad at sex', im not, ive had 6 other sex partners and with all of them, the girls could submit and enjoy it, and most kept returning for more, i enjoyed it too. with my gf, she cannot submit. she cannot relax. her muscles are always tense and she thrashes her limbs about, sometimes hitting or biting me at random moments.she also begs to shove a butt plug or dildo up my ass and i hate it. sometimes when she blows me she tries shoving fingers up my ass and i hate it and yell at her to stop and sometimes she cries due to it and i feel like the bad guy. feels like im playing that operation game where if you touch the sides the game buzzes and you loose. she is so skinny too that her body isnt attractive for me. it also makes her more delicate.well we are together irl now and she is coming over to my flat often so it is a matter of time until we have sex or at least start to have sex. i havent initiated anything, despite her saying she was horny a few times, and me being horny a few times, because amongst other reasons of how much i dread sex with her. i always feel worse after it. i have cheated on her with 2 women, not just because i wanted some good sex, but other reasons such as our emotional bond going cus of long distance and me finding something special and somethings that felt more important elsewhere.how can i get her to not be so fucking dogshit at sex. i haven't told her i dislike sex with her.i need sex and i will either have to make sex with her improve, i guess through just being more dominant and forcing myself on her, or via cheating, or via breaking up with her, but id rather not do that (over this) when this feels like a problem that could be solved. thanks.
Just have utilitarian sex where it's only for reproduction, not emotions. Love is fleeting and not completely reliable.
>>34580510>one time she asked me to grab her boobs really hard and when i did she started sobbing
>>34580510>i guess through just being more dominant and forcing myself on her>gf acts like a rape victim>"I know, I should rape her!"Actual mouthbreathing subhuman, kys.
>>34580597keekekekthisjust leave her anon, she problaby has issues and traumas with her sexuallity so if you're not ready or prepared to deal with that leave her
>>34580510Break up with her anon, I don't think you're solving this problem
>>34580511>ive had 6 other sex partners and with all of them, the girls could submit and enjoy it,I don't doubt that they submitted, and I don't doubt that they *appeared* to be enjoying it. I dare say they also "came back for more" because they knew that if they didn't you would probably break up with them. But did they actually enjoy it? Based on the way you come across in these posts, I feel safe in saying "no". You sound insufferable.Admittedly, while we're only getting your side of the story here, your girlfriend sounds equally insufferable. I've no idea how the two of you have lasted this long. You're well past the point now where the two of you should have faced the fact that you're not sexually compatible and given up. >>34580510>once i was fucking her and close to cumming and she said she wanted to stop but i kept going cus i wanted to cumJust so you know: in many countries this meets the legal definition of rape. Assuming you don't want to go to prison, don't do this.
>>34580705Ok, thanks Reddit. I know you are usually the one watching couples have sex, but you weren't watching me and my ex partners have sex. I am not claiming to be incredible or even much better than average in bed, but I know for a fact that it was better than this, and most of the times they enjoyed it. Sure, them begging me to fuck them and getting pissed off at me the times I wouldn't is them 'appearing' to enjoy it, faggot.
The best way to get something out of your partner is to have a discussion and negotiate.Start off by asking "what can i do to make it easier for you to have sex?"The conversation starts ariund the premise of what you can do to get your goal.You can then negotiate.A lot of times, either attraction faded, the honeymoon period ended or tyour partner resents you and sees this as punishment.If the attraction faded they will tell you to workout or lose weight.If the honeymoon phase is over, that's kinda it. Deal with it or breakup.If it is resentment, this method helps resolve it.If during the negotiation she doesn't want to open up or do anything else, assume it was the former and she doesn't want to fulfill your needs. In that case, breakup and find a partner that will.If you don't you will both resent each other and will end up in a breakup anyways.
>>34580510i can't really help you but my gf displays some of the same behaviors. she doesn't do the fake porn noise and this stuff, but she also can never relax and weirdly enough she also playfully tried to put a finger into my asshole a few times (though never seriously).at least in the case of my gf the majority of the problems seem to come from the fact that she fears pregnancy. when we were freshly together we had a broken condom one time and that stuck with her mentally. another thing is that since she started working full time she could never relax like before, that's another big one. maybe your gf generally has a lot of stress through work or other stuff.a big problem in general is that once an issue with sex starts, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy for women. like, if it hurt badly once there can always be the fear of it happening again and then the next time they can't relax and stay tense, which hurts them and makes the fears worse.
>>34581361>Sure, them begging me to fuck them and getting pissed off at me the times I wouldn't is them 'appearing' to enjoy it,Now you're getting it. That's precisely what it was.
>>34582736and you know because?
>>34580510I'll give you solid advice: Next her, and self reflect on how you can be more genuine so that you attract a more genuine girlfriend.Or, if you have the heart for it: understand that women have real value placed upon them by men therefore they have infinite access to sex, love, care, intimacy. You are disposable. You are currently giving her love and she doesn't want to go through this again, and you're filling a comfy hole in her life and heart, but clearly she doesn't desire you. She would next you so hard for a cock to ride on and lock down next, and she'd give that next guy all the porn faces while getting fucked and creaming and cumming and enjoying it, until she has him locked down. Then she'll withdraw sex from him as well.So, knowing this - I would keep her around for emotional support, while looking for another girl.
>>34583550Thanks for the advice. I did find another girl, we slept together, things were amazing. The sex was good, but the time spent with her was good too, I really felt like I felt comfortable in my life with her, I made her happy and she made me happy. We called daily for hours and hours for about a month, as well as meeting irl for 4 days, walking around, eating drinking and cuddling. And I was sure I would brake up with my gf, and I still want to. But now that my gf and I have met irl, it is harder for me because I don't love her anymore but I don't want to hurt her by breaking up, idk how to do it. The new girl who found me, who I had a great time with and still love, she wanted to break up with my gf asap, and I refused to do this, and then she accused me of 'making a decision to stay with my gf because I loved her' and blocked me. She didn't give me a chance to reply or to say goodbye.C, if you are reading this, I told you that the last time we met when we called that I told my gf she should prepare for a future without me. And then when we did meet yesterday, I got mad at her over something, she cried a lot, and I wanted to be away from her, and was happy when she went home. But sure, I 'love' her. You'll believe what you want to believe. We didn't even find all the fucking gubbies. Anyway. Now that the new girl has gone, I don't know what to do. I wanted to have a life in my home country and I pictured one with this new girl, but she has gone, what is the point of me living there anymore. And if I break up with my gf, I'll have no one to be with and I don't wanna be alone. So yeah. Thank you for the advice. My gf and I are not meant to be together. There are times when we both look at happy couples and we are probably thinking the same thing. We both irritate the hell out of each other and disagree and don't click on basically everything. Hopefully I will find someone else who I click with just as much as I did with the new girl but I doubt it.
