i really need to talk to you guys. i'm not doing well because of my own behavior. i made a thread here yesterday too about this tendency i seem to have to hurt my boyfriend.it came back. i wouldn't stop insulting him, putting him down, telling him i didn't love him i was full of hatred toward him for reasons i can't even explain. now i think he's disgusted with me and that he's going to pull away emotionally for good.i'm completely lost.
>insulting him, putting him down, telling him i didn't love him i was full of hatred toward himYea, people with a grain of self respect will not tolerate this absolutely disgusting behavior. Emotionally unstable and mean women are the worst. Time to find your next onions boy you can lash your impending doom of self hatred on.
>>34580869Well, I don't really see the ambiguity in you thinking you lost it, this seems quite definitive. I'd assume most anons will just lash out at you, but my advice is give yourself some space. I don't think this can be mended easily, so tell him you need some space (if you can still contact him) and once you are truly to yourself and give some time can you parse why you do these things.Just, ensure you put yourself in a spot that you don't have to act rashly anymore. This isn't just about this relationship, but if you lash out to somebody you love to this degree then you have a load more shit to parse through.
bpdemon
>>34580869If it makes you feel better my ex blocked me after I spammed them begging to come back. I could have done better but I feel like we could have worked things out. Stuff like that just makes you replay it over and over in your head and think about what you could have done.
>>34580869I would definitely tell him to leave your bitch ass not gonna lie
>>34580869If this is a recurring thing, it might be BPD, in which case I strongly recommend you seek medical and psychological attention.In any case, what I believe you should do is apologize honestly, say that it isn't his fault, and then seek help. I recommend not engaging in further relationships until you get things under control within yourself.
>>34580869Have you been assessed for ADHD?
>>34580869>i wouldn't stop insulting him, putting him down, telling him i didn't love him i was full of hatred toward him for reasons i can't even explain.You couldn't control your behaviour, and don't even know why you were engaging in that behaviour?Are you undergoing any form of therapy? Clearly you need some help.
>>34580869hello! I have experienced something similar in my life that I'm trying to process myself. If you want we can chat over discord