Hey friends i really need help over here.I have a long relationship, around 7 years now. About three years ago i started working out and now i am in a really good shape, my face is also attractive and i improved my fashion game so overall i made a pretty good change.The thing is, i have never been the kind of guy who naturally attracted femenine attention, but now im in this position and im liking it more than i should. In the last months i have been approached by two coworkers, about three girls on parties and i have got a few explicit messages on language exchanging apps (im italian learning japanese)I know i need to stop this, but i dont know how, its so exciting getting the girls attention, a lot more if you come from not getting any since never. What can i do?
>>34583696Just say your gay :)
>>34583696I am in a similar situation, 6 years relationship, even gf tells me that her girl friends comment on how good looking I am and they've complimented my physique twice now. Look, there's no right way to do this, only the wrong one which is feeding this type of attention by allowing people to disrespect your relationship. Don't think of it as compliment, think of it as "this person sees me happy in a relationship but they do not care, they want to feed their lust/ego" which is true in most cases. Even if a girl genuinely wants to make you happy by being a better gf for you, it's all rooted on competition and ego. If someone gets explicit with you, the answer is "i have a gf and do not want to give the wrong ideas" because if you do allow this to keep going it will blow up on your face, and dancing around it like it's no big deal will give these women expectation and keep them coming. I liked being courted, I liked that they were into me and telling me these things using sweet words, but you gotta keep it at bay and learn to not need the high you get from attention to live.
>>34583864???>>34583883Thanks friend. The thing is, since i didnt have this feelings until now, i dont know how to make my brain dislike this kind of attention. I know they don do itbecause they love me or wanting to have me as a bf (thats impossible, i wouldnt change my gf for anything or anyone, i love her to death). Its just lust and ego, but i really like the sensation, and i want to erase that need from myself.Especially on the asian ones that is the hardest for me
If a guy more handsome than you, richer than you, and better than you went up to your gf, would she monkeybranch?
>>34583696>hey /adv/. im really hot and i have TONS of chicks throwing themselves at me. like, so many chicks its causing issues. im worried that im going to ruin my relationship because i just have TOO MANY hot women trying to fuck me. there are just so many hot women trying to have sex with me! how can I stop this?
>>34583948None of them are better than she in any sense. Its just my monkey brain enjoying being called the hot guy>>34583955I know it can sound like that, but i can assure you is fucking me up. I also knew this reply was coming, i know where im posting but im asking for honest advice here my friend. What would you do?
>>34583938>and i want to erase that need from myself.I get what you're saying but that's not the way. You won't erase the enjoyment you get from being chased and courted, you'll have to learn to live with it. Being human is knowing which urges to feed into action, and which to let scream alone in your consciousness. Just know that it's ok to like the attention from them at it's lowest intensity but you can't let it evolve into disrespect for you and your gf, and this is something that you'll have to regulate for each woman you speak with.
>>34584141Thanks for the advice friend, it is a good one. Do you have any tips on how to control that lust?
>>34584163Honestly, I'd say distance yourself from those people, but sometimes that's just not possible and maybe they're friends, so it may seem a little too harsh but you may need to set a clear boundary with some people. Even then, if you do say something like "hey, I am in a relationship and don't appreciate flirting/nothing is gonna happen between us" or anything that confronts the intentions of a girl, they may still keep going at it, and it's at this point that only distancing can work. Now, if you do feel attraction to some of them I can only recommend you get as far away from them as you can. I started enjoying too much attention from my gf's friend and started developing some feelings, immediately stopped talking to her, gaming, going out, all of it as soon as I noticed. Another way to gently undermine approaches by girls is to interject by mentioning your relationship.>Hey anon I can tell you work out>"Gee thanks my gf also really likes it"Type of shit women do ya know, if they talk about your clothes tell them you gf helped you choose and that she has good taste, stuff like that.
>>34583696The winner takes it allThe loser standing small
>>34584350Thanks friend. A lot of them already know that i am on a relationship, and they take it as a shield because they know nothing is going to happen between us (i would never cheat on her) to keep flirting. But i am also guilty, i dont necesarily encourage it but sometimes i let it slide or play algong just to fulfill my ego and feel the rush. I need to remove the craving of female attention from me in order to distance myself from this kind oh behaviour
>>34584364What do you mean by this anon?
