What am i even supposed to do in this world? My entire life, I have felt wrong and like i'm missing a part of my brain that makes me human. I'm so retarded in social situations that i don't think i've had a meaningful connection with someone ever. I feel like a complete waste of a woman, i am so bleak and offputting that no matter how allegedly 'attractive' my features are or how much effort i put into my appearance nobody will ever even pretend to like me enough to have a kind of enjoyable relationship. I know that i will never have any type of happy life that my mind desperately craves. I hate this awful world that is run by awful people, and i don't want to be a cog in this evil machine. I feel like my life is completely over even though i'm only 18. I can't imagine living an entire lifetime feeling like this. I really feel like i should just kill myself so my family doesn't have to watch me suffer but i'm too scared of permanently crippling myself and making my life 100x worse to follow through. also no cute cartoon gals in the nonexistent heaven
The more you act like the 12 year old who got pissed off because his little sister had the ride the carousel ride and he missed out on the world famous rollercoaster that was gonna get shut down, the more miserable you'll be. It isn't that you are dumb, it is that you are kind of a bit too smart for your own good. There are these social situations that can actually be kind of valuable if you become brave enough to face them, and it won't be easy, and I don't blame you, people like me and others are scary, but you should know better. Because if your english teacher can read what I say and get it right you can too, so this bizarre interpretation of things is what has to go. You are not a psychiatrist or a therapist or even trained in the field, so guessing people's illnesses, character, or anything is a form of bullying not making intellectual reasons.
>>34586255Can you elaborate on whats causing you so much distress?>I know that i will never have any type of happy life that my mind desperately craves.Why not? Just because you're socially retarded?>I hate this awful world that is run by awful people, and i don't want to be a cog in this evil machine. What about it in particular causes you so much misery?
>>34586255>I feel like a complete waste of a woman, i am so bleak and offputting that no matter how allegedly 'attractive' my features are or how much effort i put into my appearance nobody will ever even pretend to like me enough to have a kind of enjoyable relationship.I'm a 27-year-old mentally ill incel loser, and I would fall in love with you the moment you showed me a hint of basic politeness. But you probably only want 10/10 Chads, so fuck you. Bitch.
>Are some people just born fundamentally broken?Yes. Like 40% of the human population are straight up genetic trash.
>>34586284I've always tried to stop comparing my life to others but it's so hard not to when i feel so far gone that the idea of just having someone be nice to me without hyperfocusing on the social cues that i can see very vividly from others but never use to my own advantage feels like an abstract unobtainable fantasy. This is what i need to hear but i have no idea how to implement it in a way that helps me.>>34586312>Just because you're socially retarded?Yes. Human connection is so important and i can see how it is for other people but i can't have it for myself >What about it in particular causes you so much misery?Politics and economy are shit, but these conditions are just because i'm american. I want to move away to somewhere better but i would kill myself immediately if i couldn't see my grandma. Plus, even if i lived elsewhere violence is inescapable, hearing about war or violent crimes committed by others makes me have no faith in the world
>>34586318Nobody has ever been in love with or tried to have sex with me, unattractive person or attractive person.
>>34586339Can you really not connect with *anyone?* Even if you have literally zero intuitive social ability, can't you fake it by saying whatever seems logically best at a given moment?How many times have you tried to make friends? Are you sure you're not overreacting to one or two failed friendships?
>>34586386Also, I don't know what you're like, so I can't say this with any certainty, but most people I've known with "no social ability at all" actually have no confidence at all, and can't socialize because starting a conversation triggers their fight/flight response (which prevents them from tapping into their intuitive social instincts). Are you sure you really, really, don't have any social ability? Or is it just being suppressed by an anxiety disorder?
>>34586352>Nobody has ever been in love with or tried to have sex with me, unattractive person or attractive person.to all men reading this please disregard what she just saidwhat she means by no man is no man above 6/10 in looksbecause anything under doesn’t quantify as human in her brain
>>34586386I can carry a very surface level conversations if the other person is basically talking at me. I mirror everyone i talk to to the point that i have no personality and am just an agreeable doormat, which is not appealing and makes people uncomfortableI don't actively pursue people anymore as it nearly always ends badly>>34586391I'm not sure, i think my social anxiety and self-isolation has resulted in me losing any social skills i had. I have always been awkward and offputting but i used to be able to hold surface level friendships when i was younger. I have developed extreme anxiety among other mental issues over the past two years that makes everything hard to do
>>34586426i don't quantify as human in my own brainI think you don't realize how absolutely serious i am when i say nobody. I have been approached once in my life, when i was 16 and at school. The guy ghosted me a few weeks later. I have never been approached since.
>>34586470No offense intended, but, this is key to your situation : YOU ARE ONLY 18. I know how it seems like that's a long time, since you've only been alive that long, and i know you see things around you on social media, whatever, and it seems like you are so radically different situation, and no one has ever had it quite this bad, but, with 100% certainty, you are pretty average. i was NEVER approached in MY life, there was ONE time... i still remember... lol... i was working in the mall, think i was 22, chick walked past my booth about 4 times, i thought it was weird, till she finally introduced herself and asked me out. never happened since, lol. even so, i've managed to do quite a great many things. another thing, just as a watched pot doesn't boil, the same about a love life if you're obsessed with it, it will see to never come. it will. eventually, probably you will to.fordf
>>34586453>I have developed extreme anxiety among other mental issues over the past two years that makes everything hard to doThis is good news, because it suggests you are not fundamentally unfixable, just going through a rough patch. This is a pretty trite advice to get, but I would suggest you just keep trying - social anxiety does go away with enough successful socialization. As for how to successfully socialize:>I can carry a very surface level conversations if the other person is basically talking at me. I mirror everyone i talk to to the point that i have no personalityThis is really common in people who have spent a lot of time socially isolated. Usually, its caused by not having anything to talk about. My advice is, when talking to someone you don't know, go in with the goal of getting as much information out of them as possible. Ask questions whenever you can, and ask questions that open opportunities for more questions. For example:>Do anything interesting this summer?"Yeah, I went to Brazil">Oh, cool! Why there?"Oh, my mother is Brazilian, so we go to visit our relatives every summer">Oh! Wait, can you speak Portuguese?"Yes, but really poorly. It's actually really awkward trying to communicate with them. I usually stay in my room and read".>Oh, did you read anything interesting?"Yeah, I read this book about the such-and-such heist in 19XX">Why was it interesting?"Oh, so there was this diamond, and they stole it by...."This is a good conversation. You learned about this persons background, built rapport, and got them talking about something they like. The same conversation could just as easily end twelve seconds in, though:>Do anything interesting this summer?"Yeah, I went to Brazil">Was it fun?"Yeah I guess."Many socially inept people talk like this, run into awkward silence, and think they're fundamentally incapable of socialization - when really, their approach just sucks.Anyways, hope all this helped. Good luck, anon.
>>34586319And they drag down the rest
>>34586255Unless you are literally severely mentally retarded or some shit, you can get pretty far with just learning how to deal with situations and you can reprogram yourself to change bad behavioral patterns, although it takes effort. Social skills are a thing you can train just like any other skill. If you realise you fucked up, try to identify exactly how and why it was a mistake and what you should have done instead.>18If you were 40 than maybe you had a real problem here but you are basically still a baby.
>>34586470I don't think people getting randomly approached is that common anymore in 2026, especially if you come across as kind of guarded and uncomfortable cause I can imagine you do not give off an "approach me" vibe. I don't think it means anything.
>>34586352Have you given anyone a chance yo fall in love or have sex with you? You don't sound like you go out much and interact with people
>>34586255Even though I have a few years on you I totally relate.Honestly I am seeking an answer myself, I also feel fundamentally broken in some aspects, like my whole being is not designed to interact with people accordingly and end up unscathed, not because life was horrible or anything, it's just that I react to things poorly, like getting anxious easily or stressing to much over things, like some sort of anxious rabbit or something. I'm assuming you worry over romantic prospects. And I'd say that should be the least of your worries. Even I got a relationship, when I turned 20, despite everything I mentioned above (but desu that relationship contributed and boosted everything I mentioned, if anything). Even if you're not into men and have a smaller dating pool you're bound to find someone who'll at least consider fucking you, that's just statistics.Maybe life hasn't started for you yet. You're 18. I know it hasn't for me as I use a lot of my time traveling to and attending my classes (around 12 hours total of a day without counting studying). Same could apply to you, I think. I don't know if things will improve per se, but in my case I at least know I will be much more free once I have my own money and spend only 8 hours working instead of 15 studying and taking busses. Same could happen to you.
>>34586255>Are some people just born fundamentally broken?yes.life is unfair, accept, move on and do the best you can with the cards you've been dealt
>>34586470If you have autism then it's game over>ur a grillYou still have a 'continue' some guy will want to fill. [spoiler]Not me though cuz it's never me.[/spoiler]
>>34586255Yes, born fundamentally broken sometimes. But more often it's the aristotelian idea of someone being not socialized and raised properly so there's nothing you can do to fix them anymore now that they're an adult. That's a realistic view of people.
>>34586562>Brazil
>>34586470>I have never been approached since.How much do you weight? Are you ethnic? Are you a native of your country or did your parent migrate? Do you go out a lot?
>>34586255>My entire life, I have felt wrong and like i'm missing a part of my brain that makes me humanIn the same boat here. At some point you just have to admit to yourself that you are not "normal". The fancy hip word is "neurodivergent". At best you can make up some fake personas you can act out to hold a job and deal with annoying people. It's really exhausting though.It can help to find other people who are in the same boat. At the least so you can complain to people who get it.
Thank you anons for your words, I've been thinking more critically about how to get myself out of this way of thinking. All of my problems are seemingly caused by my own inaction and i can recognize my learned helplessness, so i'm trying to think of ways to change what i am doing now. This isn't enjoyable at all and i've been puking from anxiety all day but i know that change is not something easy when i've been stuck in my ways. I threw together a resume today and i'm going to force myself to at the very least apply to part time jobs in my area, applied to one today. Maybe being forced to interact with others in a wagie setting will lead to something better through training my social skills because i don't know any other settings i would talk to people naturally>>34588049I am white and look like a child. I'm 5ft with round features. I don't think i am particularly 'ugly' but i don't look sexually appealing. I also know from what other people tell me is that i look unhappy at all times even when i am happy/smiling as naturally as i can. No idea how much i weigh, i have a disconnect with my own body because i used to be anorexic and severely underweight. I'm at if i had to guess a normal weight on a small bone structure. I hardly leave my house other than to go to stores.>>34586836I'm trying to decenter romantic relationships from my way of thinking, but constantly seeing people talk of their own experiences makes me feel so behind. But i'm also envious of regular friendships too in the same way
>>34588492>5ftDamn, you're petite. I would feel like a giant around you, and I'm like 5'11.>I am white and look like a child.Don't you think this is the reason why men don't approach you? Nowadays, men are ostracized even when they approach an 18 year old and they're like in their 20s... I think that many guys might find you cute but be afraid of approaching you in the case you're a literal child... I had a cousin that had this same problem as you, even when she drove around town law enforcement would stop her thinking she was a 12 year old driving her parent's car, lol>I hardly leave my house other than to go to stores.That also might be the second reason, guys may not even have the opportunity to approach you if you don't go outside.
>>34588549>Don't you think this is the reason why men don't approach you?Yes, i don't like it but i don't go out of my way to look more stereotypically 'adult'. I wish people would ask for age instead of their preconceived notions though i understand why others would think that's an awkward interaction..I would like to leave the house more but i never know what to do. I live in a very rural area so i don't have things to easily go to, made even more difficult because i don't have my license. I'm working on that though>even when she drove around town law enforcement would stop her thinking she was a 12 year old driving her parent's car, loli hope this doesn't happen to me i will panik and do some retard shit then get my car searched because i act so suspiciously anxious i must be hiding a corpse
>>34588654>i hope this doesn't happen to me i will panik and do some retard shit then get my car searched because i act so suspiciously anxious i must be hiding a corpseI hope that doesn't happens to you, specially if you're in America, I've seen so many videos of police brutality, it's kinda of crazy.>i don't like it but i don't go out of my way to look more stereotypically 'adult'You don't need to though, unless you really want to, I think that once the person you're talking to gets to know your real age, it won't matter as much.>I would like to leave the house more but i never know what to do.>I live in a very rural area so i don't have things to easily go toDon't rural areas usually have rodeos and things like that? Sorry, I grew up in a big city, so most of what I know about rural areas comes from TV and the vacations I took as a teenager. But I think there must be plenty of things to do. You can go horseback riding, fishing, hiking, hunting, camping, attend local fairs and festivals, work on outdoor projects, keep animals, garden, or just spend time enjoying nature. I actually plan on living in a rural area once I've saved enough money. For me, nothing beats the tranquility and slower pace of life.
