I'm a 27-year-old incel, but I'd like to get into dating. The problem is I'm also a complete social outcast, which means I have no friends or social media to corroborate that I'm a real human being. I know it gives women the ick, so I'm wondering if it'd be wise to pretend that I actually do have a girlfriend. And if things go well, I can pretend to break up with my pretend girlfriend, and pretend that my pretend friends stopped talking to me because I cheated on her.What do you think? Is this a good idea? Can I even pull this off?
>>34595763You cannot pull this off
>>34595763I think this is a bad idea, but I don't see why it wouldn't work. Plenty of women want to cheat for some reason and worst-case scenario this woman just finds out that you aren't betraying your gf (because you don't have one). I don't think this story ends in a good or happy relationship, tho, because you can't trust homewreckers
>>34595763get a social life before datingyou're trying to cook a 5 course meal without knowing how to fry an eggthat's not how things workI know this will take longer but there are no shortcuts.
>>34595763Theyll know your bullshitting. You can’t fake it. It’s gotta be a pheromones thing or something.
>>34595775man if you're seeing someone for a month and you find out she doesn't have any friends, no male or female friends at all, wouldn't you think that's weird as fuckthey say not all of them but it's always one of themi would just run, there is a reason that person doesn't have friends, probably low self control, having friends also means learning to negotiate stuff, doing stuff other people want at times, knowing how to propose a plan without throwing a tantrum, and a long etc.
>>34595799Men don't give a shit if a woman has friends
>>34595815I do
>>34595799Your alternative plan is also bound to fail because it involves building a relationship with a homewrecker
>>34595831I don't think you know what my previous post was or are taking things out of context but I never said anything about dating people that already have a partner or having a partner yourself to then date someone elseI told him to get a social circle first and then start dating instead of lying about having friends
>>34595763girls started hitting on me when I got a gf and they stopped when we broke up. you're not crazy op, it works
>>34595763>pretend that I actually do have a girlfriendwomen have a kind of radar for this, no need to tell them. it's in the way you carry yourself. downside is bullshitting about it probably won't work. besides, in the age of social media, it's becoming really hard to fake this convincingly>me at work, keeping it strictly professional>have long term gf>slightly older coworker gets divorced, drops hints she'd like me to invite her over (never happening, I don't shit where I eat)>dump gf, start having casual sex thanks to apps>younger women at work suddenly interested in methey just know
>>34595860Oh, sorry, I though you were OP and I was criticizing his plan. You're right that OP needs to get some friends
>>34595763If you pretend to do this, whether you succeed or fail; it will be a funny story you can tell people, and make you seem like an interesting and charismatic person (which will help you make friends). >>34595768>>34595775>>34595780are women brained men or genuine women trying to gatekeep you. Just don't reveal too much to her when you're trying to keep up the larp, be mysterious about it, but leave clues (through the multiple public social media accounts). Ask chatgpt to design their personalities, give ideas for posts, etc. Go for it OP, if it works or fails, report back with a greentext.
>>34595763faking social proof is genius
>>34595799nta i just don't have friends bc i gave on that really young. i became very shy and withdrawn from a bad childhood even if as a younger kid i was apparently very social. and i noticed noone but men who want to fuck/date (not be friends) will talk to me first. and i am still currently too shy to talk to random people first. so, no friends.it's always sad to see how so many people have such negative expectations about ppl with no friends. my issue is more like being ""too nice"", like being too preoccupied with being polite so i end up showing no personality in social situations.
>>34598946Yeah, I act like a pussy socially too, it's a huge pain. I feel like my brain doesn't really work when I'm talking to others, too focused on trying to seem normal, like obscuring the fact I like anime to those peers in my art class who were into it for no reason. Fuck my gayass brain dude.
>>34598972Also when anyone reacts positively to me, or I make a good first impression, it becomes impossible to talk to them further (fear of something). Fuck man. I hate it.
>>34598976I want to do my life over
>>34598972yeah even understanding what causes it doesn't mean you can just stop it in an actual social situation where everything goes out the window and you're just in survival mode no matter what. i had a similar situation recently too, i was in a university club (that i stopped going to since ngl) where people were talking about aleister crowley for some reason, whom i have read a lot about, including his writings. but it sounded like they didn't know as much on the topic, and i was afraid i'd sound like i was seeking attention, or a know it all, i just stayed silent during the whole conversation and didn't say anything at all basically the whole time i was there. it's painful lol.
>>34598984Yeah man it sucks
>>34599057yep. i know you shouldn't blame your parents but damn i wish i was put into some sort of social hobby or sports hobby as a kid, like seemingly all other kids were. maybe it would've helped me become more normal and get social skills .
>>34599066For me, going from a shy kid with a few close friends to spending the last 2 years of hs as a mute was enough to end up like this. Previous experience didn't really help at all, I forgot how to talk to my old peers on the rare occasions I bumped into them, or they reached out. I got Flowers for Algernon'd. I know the solution is probably something like(Effort -> Confidence -> Make the first move socially -> ??? (situational chance) -> repeat enough times -> [whatever happens when you move from acquaintances to friends] -> friends)I've got no idea how to bridge the gap between making an acquaintance, and becoming someone's friend.
>>34599096lmao i had the exact same experience in hs in regards to being a mute. i just did not talk to anyone, always sat alone when i ate every single time etc. it was like i was a ghost the whole 3 years.>I've got no idea how to bridge the gap between making an acquaintance, and becoming someone's friend.from what i know this is definitely the hardest part. i'm still not as social as i want to be and haven't been able to put my theory to the test enough, but i think you just gotta be ruthless and stop initiating/trying when you sense the other person is not putting in the same effort. i think it's good to be able to recognize the 99% from the 1% (people who already have several friends and a rich social circle and don't want more friends unless vs. people who also actively want friends, like you).
>>34599108>unless you offer an amazing deal and can give them something they want*forgot to add that to last sentence
>>34599108I'll try this, mutual reaching out/ sharing personal stuff seems to be what separates those two categories
>>34595763>so I'm wondering if it'd be wise to pretend that I actually do have a girlfriend.>And if things go well, I can pretend to break up with my pretend girlfriend,>and pretend that my pretend friends stopped talking to me because I cheated on her.Have you tried just being normal, OP?
>>34595763>Is this a good idea? No. >Can I even pull this off?No.
>>34595768I have to agree with this anon, a loner that pretends to have a gf and a dude with a gf are diferent beings entirely, specially when in contact with other girls. Same way you can spot a cheater easily, although women who claim to be able to do so still tell stories about how they've been cheated.>>34598940>it will be a funny story you can tell people, and make you seem like an interesting and charismatic personAbsolutely not lmao it will seem like OP is a loser that can only get girls by manipulating women and reinforcing adultery>>34599148we are on 4chan this is the least retarded plan I've seen this week
>>34599714>manipulating women are you a woman yourself? this is every interaction men have with women, this would be a funny and courageous move by OP
>>34601203also he is a loser objectively, so are most guys here. pretending that you're a cool guy when you've never had a girlfriend and your social life is desolate is just incompatible with reality, which is offputting and reeks of either a lack of self-awareness, or desperation. Honesty, courage and a bit of cheekiness (like OP's plan), on the other hand, are attractive traits from men. As long as OP only hints at it/ leaves evidence, and doesn't outright lie.
>>34595763>What do you think?It could work, but keeping up the lies will become a burden if things ever get serious.>Is this a good idea?Not particularly, like, it might work sometimes but believe me that your dates will notice something is off if you lie.>Can I even pull this off?Maybe, though consider that you will not solve the root problems, and they might come back later and chew you in the butt.
