Should I try opening up my relationship with my gf? What are the thoughts on people who have attempted that and how did it went?I'm in a monogamous relationship but I want to go with other women, so it's either breaking up completely or soft break by proposing to open up for both of us (even though, I know her preference is to be monogamous).
If you want to fuck random women why get into a relationship in the first place, retard
>>34596197Alright, so that's a point for breaking up.
>>34596192Just cheat and don't tell her. She's probably already doing the same.
>>34596201I don't think she is, but definitely I do higher odds of cheating.
>>34596199I second this. Should have never started dating or been serious/exclusive
>>34596192she'll be on her 10th guy creampying her and you'll be on the first "maybe, to be confirmed"
>>34596303Yeah I know, she was the one that pressured for the relationship and I went for it.>>34596306I can get girls nigga, could care less if she fucks some other dude (that's why I want to fuck other foids).In fact just now out of the blue my previous gf of the past 2 years, i think? Just texted me lmao. I'm so fucked with my own desires. But yeah would feel bad getting back with my ex gf still, since i broke her heart, same as I might to current gf
>>34596315If you can get girls, why are you still with her? You would just be accepting the status quo except 10 other guys have fucked her instead. If you want to be with her, why would you want this, if you want to be with others, why would you stay with her? Seems like a lose lose to me
>>34596326Cannot accept her past and baggage, so staying right now is mostly about comfort, I know I can do better which is mind racing to drop her. But then again I have heavy commitment issues which loops back to:>I cannot accept her, you can do better, dump her.
>>34596340You are broken
>>34596340I’m confused, you can’t accept her past so you are giving her a situation where she’s disloyal and get an higher body count which you couldn’t accept in the first place?This is twisted logic, just dump her
>>34596346Probably.>>34596364Yes, at least it will give me the freedom to fuck around. But i guess breaking up with her would be better
>>34596369End it, bro.
>>34596192>Should I try opening up my relationship with my gf?No.Now, understand that I am someone who is a strong advocate of ethical non-monogamy. I've never been in a relationship that wasn't open, and many of them have gone extremely well. I've known loads of other people who were very happy in non-exclusive relationships as well. A number of my past involvements have ended, but not usually for that reason; my current relationships are open, and wonderful, and I expect them to last.However, I have never known anyone successfully transition from being exclusive to being open. When it works, it works because you're open right from the start, and this is fully negotiated before you get together. If you begin with an expectation of monogamy, one person or the other ultimately will always want to get back to that. Things that are likely to go wrong: 1) Your girlfriend may initially think she can handle you fucking other women and then realise that actually she can't. 2) You may not be nearly as comfortable with her fucking other men as you think you are.3) Somebody starts keeping secrets about what they're up to, which leads to resentment and suspicion. (A "don't ask, don't tell" policy NEVER works).4) Either you or she neglects to tell someone else you're involved with that you have a primary partner, and the other person gets hurt.5) One of you makes the fatal mistake of imagining that the rules for them don't need to be the same as they for the other person (e.g. you get it into your head that it's okay for you to fuck other women but it's not okay for her to fuck other men). This ABSOLUTELY ALWAYS ends in disaster.6) Somebody gets an STD.7) Someone your girlfriend is seeing asks her to leave you and be exclusive with him, and she agrees.
>>34596340>Cannot accept her past and baggageThen A: you're an asshole, but also B: there's no point in staying with her at all if you already know the relationship won't last. I feel like the only reason you're considering an open relationship is because you're too much of a coward to actually break up with her. It's not the case that you want to be with her and with other people, it's that you *don't* want to be with her. That's a stupid reason for trying to go open. Just break up.
>>34596315it's not about getting girls but the huge difference between a girl and guyunless you're a very attractive guy and the girl is below averageall things being equal she'll receive x10 the attention, and you know it.
>>34596431Thanks for the reply, I agree this is not gonna end good at all.>>34596455Checked, I've told her many times I'm not fully committed and I cannot give her what she wants, somehow we just kept ignoring it, thinking it will get better. But the reality is that my own commitment issues + her past are something I cannot handle. So deep down I know it's not gonna last.>>34596474Oh definitely agree, she can get 10x the amount I could get. No questions on that, still I resent that's she's not taking care of her own body and I do take care of myself. I've being patient but she's turning 30 this year and if you don't have exercise habits people don't really change (and yes I've already told her she should take care of her own body).
Open relationships are complex and demanding enough when both partners are really passionate about wanting one. It's not a good solution for struggling with monogamy.
Any other insights?
>>34596474This. You could be chadlite and still having to approach people, seem chharming, fight for scraps, pay for shit and so on while any ltb can just flash her tits to almost anyone in a bar and get railed. Im not an incel or particularly believe bp shit but that's just the hard truth and why a lot of open relations dont seem very equal
>>34597213I literally could start a small harem, so I don't really care. And as far as scraps Im well aware of it. Most women are trash nowadays, so there's nothing out there that's special still.Even if unbalanced I wouldn't mind, in fact would prefer for her to find someone that's fully into her so she can detach. I am currently her one support.But I want to do better, is it too much for me to ask for an equal and not someone I consider inferior? (Past and literally broke economically speaking, she's running her own business now and Im supportive but I don't think that business has any future desu).
>>34597253>is it too much for me to ask for an equal and not someone I consider inferior?Given that you are apparently allowed to have a past and she isn't, yes, that's too much to ask. Also, you need to fix your commitment issues before you can deserve to be with someone decent.
>>34597493My past is nothing like hers tho.And I'm well aware I need to fix my own commitment issues, else Ill just repeat the cycle of breaking other girls which I had done multiple times already.I think people like me are not easy to fix at all, think I'll end up lonely in the end since that's what I want. I like the chase, seduction and once it's real I push them back, I see their flaws, and I don't want to commit to someone I see as imperfect and inferior.
>>34596315then just break up.
