Got banned from another place tn.
God why do I have to be so fucking retarded?
I said inappropriate things to 2 people. Why did they have to report me? Why did they have to ban me?
Can’t they see that I’m detransitioning, that I had a TBI, that I haven’t had a gf in 12 years?
What is even the point of trying anymore

it's over.

Sometimes I wish I could be chemically castrated. I would feel less disgusting and I wouldn't have to be aware of how gross and undesirable I am.

>>34600654
I jerked off to my dead bestfriend/girlfriend. i feel disgusted

>>34600818
Why would you do that

>>34600838
i miss her, a lot. i still miss her smell and sleeping together

tried moving on with different women, didn't work

>>34600855
How did she die?

>>34600859
Brain tumor

>>34600861
I hope I die the same way.

Aaaaaah why does she always randomly ghost me for hours is she cheating on me? Does she really not understand how this makes me feel?

Starting to regret taking a night shift. None of the coworkers have been an asshole to me, but I can see it coming in the future. The way they treat the 70 year old veteran there that's actually a hard worker for his age sickens me. I think I'd rather be in an environment surrounded by customers so all the coworkers actually have to behave. I get some ball breaking between men, but it just seems like there's a general aura of disrespect toward the man who so far has only been extremely nice and helpful to me learning the job.
I think with my past work experience, I'm just too used to a professional environment.

>>34600654
I’m on some next level creeper shit ngl
>years ago got this girls number from the gym where she worked
>things never worked out oh well
>fast forward today
> I see some girl struggling to carry a box
>i ask if she needs help and proceed to grab the box as she loses grip
>shes like oh hey I know you
>it immediately clicks but I pretend to act dumb
>walk away as she kinda ended the conversation real quick
Here’s where drunk Sherlock Holmes comes in
>google her first name and where she worked
>one of the first results is the girl who I’m 99% sure is her, from those “people search” things
>proceed to drunkenly text if this is that girl I helped out but she hasn’t replied

Like I said, next level creep. Sorry not sorry.

If I painted a mural for you, would you have erased my art?
I don't want to be cold, just know that you replaced my heart

i have graduated to the point where porn disgusts me too much to masturbate to it

feels good

why

Man, I'm never going to get over her. I'm never going to stop thinking about her. I don't want to move on. I want to be with her forever.

Fumbled another girl who was looking at me with interest at a party (I didn‘t approach her at all)
Fuck me why am I such a pussy

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I passed a drug test for the first time in 8 years today, went from 148 to 170 lbs in a month and half with a beautiful bit of muscle, and I'm on track to own a home in the place of my dreams :D You will get over her and whatever other traumas ail you. She will get older, fatter and more blown out with each year unless she injects chinese grade mystery drugs while the other women (and femboys if you're extra based) stay the same age and slim. You will get wiser with each new experience if you allow it. You age like wine my brother. She will constantly check on you out of fear that you will get better and I promise, leaving a man who surpasses every expectation when she thought she sucked the best out of him is her absolute worse fear. Love them hard and leave them knowing it won't get better than you, they will have to settle for something less exciting and will always wonder what if. Psyopping them when you know they are looking is FUN AS FUCK. I lost 5 years of my life to one person, about to be 31 and couldn't be more up. WE'RE ALL GONNA MAKE IT BROS, DON'T GIVE UP!

>>34600883
Dude yes

>>34600898
Hell yeah, team real pussy

>>34600959
Talk to her nex time foo

i am le dumbfuck grand deluxe retard here, at your service

>>34601014
Based </thread>

In a real “the grass is always greener” moment and idk how to ever snap out of it. I always tell myself the “what ifs” of trying with some other girl I once had a chance with over the relationship I am now but I understand how terrible that is of me and I feel guilty for even feeling it. I just keep it to myself.

mission failed. i fucked up. shes dead.

i tried, but i know i didnt do all i could. i said id protect her. im sorry, jane.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mku3c293arA

i still hate you you made me the hater

>>34601266
13, you could be doing anything else.

>>34601267
God. Probably not even #13.

>>34600818
So was she your best friend or girlfriend?

I don't think I'll be able to keep my lie to my parents that I finished school.
I did graduate but because of my country's retarded education system, I don't have my degree.
I even got a job to shut them up for a while but even that well is starting to dry up.
I'm almost thinking of running away from home after I save some more money.
I don't want to kill myself but I sure can't look at my mom every time she asks or approach her because I know she'll bring it up.

>femboy complains about others getting too sexual with them
>proceeds to get too sexual with me
>try to stay polite about it because i like them as a friend
>got sent a video of them in a cock cage
>wondering wtf i'm doing with my life
What

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>>>/lgbt/43831647
Dying of depression
I just want to feel loved
Crumb of sympathy please

Why are they called Army Ants? Because they're MilitANT.

Drank the recommended daily limit on caffeine intake and thought I was god again. Now sinking back to earthly despair I find mankind is in a dark time imo. I find myself surrounded by those unable to face reality and end up betraying themselves. People who only care as far as it benefits themselves. Manipulators spinning lies constantly. People must truly feel desperate to turn to such lowly means. Where are the people of character in this era? Nothing feels more lonely than this. Gotta love mood disorders :)

>>34601299
I was definitely not ANTicipating that.

>>34601304
What do you call an ant that's bad at its job? A Can't.

>>34601309
Which ant was the greatest German philosopher of all time? Immanuel Kant.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQHS4LPeGCg

>>34601312
What's an Ant's favorite type of conversation? bANTer.

>>34601315
What's an ant's favorite heavy metal band? Pantera!

>>34601319
What's an Ant's favorite beverage? fANTa.

>>34601321
What do you call an ant who tries to get funding for research departments? A grANT writer.

>>34601332
What does an Ant like to do in Church? Be a cANTor.

>>34601313
man i kinda needed this right now

>>34601336
What happens when you give an ant their favorite meal? They get frANTic!

>>34601340
What's an Ant's favorite form of argument? A rANT.

What soda does Pepe Le Pew ever only drink? Pep si.

All you have to do is reach out and sorry. I went too far in shit I said awhile back but you also outright told me to kill myself. You can join me on this if you wanted. But you have to muster up the spine to actually speak to me directly with no chatgpt. The ball is in your court.

>>34601398
Who's using ChatGPT to speak to you?

>>34601267
i am not " 13 "

>>34601420
Hence my other post.

>>34600818
why do you feel disgusted? it sounds like you love her. why is it wrong to thing sexual thoughts about someone you loved, who also presumably loved you?masturbating to thoughts of her can be a healthy way to grieve.

>>34600888
>have a chance to talk to a girl irl in a situation that is a perfect icebreaker and could be a meetcute story at your wedding
>run away to cyberstalk her and get drunk
someday i hope to be as confident as you

>>34601398
You could also continue chasing flashy limp wristed wiggers and hispanics who desperately want to be white, it'll for sure workout longterm. I'll keep wearing shorts, hawaiin shirts, flip flops, driving a 20 year old beatup truck and smashing 19-25 year olds until I find another autismo to put a ring on. I'll be in my apartment again in 4 days and at the end of the month I'll be there for a week alone to close it out. I won't be back after that. No more psyopps or shittalking, yell into the void again for me to kill myself or whatever else you've been saying while I've been busy. It'll for sure get me the next time. Or the time after that. The ball is in your court, it's going to workout for me either way, I'm outta here.

>>34601268
What’s up 777

>>34601476
Nothing, I mistook them for you.

>>34601479
You shouldn’t be thinking about me, silly

>>34601482
You pop in my head from time to time.

>>34601483
Tingly
You too

you only care about money

>>34601499
Why do you keep saying this?

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You recognise me in this thread and the other thread. But I don’t know who you are and you won’t tell me. Stupid

>>34601507
I'm some nobody that has nothing going for him, I can't even STFU when I should. I was going to ask you -- if you want to talk to my friend. He looks better than me and he's more stable, I think.

>>34601510
Nigga what

>>34601515
Aren't you white? First. Second, what you mean?

>>34601517
What the fuck are you talking about? I cannot possibly be who you think I am.

>>34601523
I'll take your word for it.

Granted, now you have gotten me a little curious. Tell the story

Too lazy to fix my life, too lazy to end myself. Hoping to gain the energy and mindset to finally pull the trigger on my life.

>>34601527
I'm going to bed. I wish I could close this 'Games' tab.

>>34601531
I don’t know you, I never have known you and I never will know you.

>>34601534
Okay? Whose fault is that?

>>34601504
as a reminder

>>34601539
What are you trying to remind someone of?

>>34601543
to remind myself that they only cared about the money my efforts would potentially provide to their envisioned goal, and now that i have it they are gone. so i must repeat they only care about money. i am infinitely richer materially without them and that saddens me.

>>34601550
Okay.

Real shit, you got that. Say less.

i know life is going to go downhill very soon, and i can't stop the clock from turning. i'm so naive, i can't stop time from happening. i'm frustrated and angry at the passage of time. i don't want to lose you but i'm just Stuck Here. Will I regret being here? of course I will. but i'm still doing nothing to be home again with you, because i can't, i'm trapped by a happy innocent life of my own design and forgetting that reality and time exists too and cannot be stopped. i'm not ready for this. i'm not religious, but may god give me strength.

I take every girl to our spot and it gets them every time

>>34600883
I try my best to communicate it w/ my boyfriend, but I usually fall asleep and am taking a nap

For real fuck this city and every faggot ass dusty aging club kid thinking they run shit with their fat ass gossiping bitch involuntary-cuck fucking friends , you faggot fucks arent real and neither is your bland pizza music or your musty shitass parties . Bitch if you didnt have gossip none of you would fuck with ts poser shit head

I need to become filthy stinking fucking rich somehow. It is the only way I can see myself getting out of this slump in my life. I do not need God or useless platitudes, I need fucking money.

That I want to act on my violent OCD thoughts.

>>34601733
Eject them out of your head. OCD is a time/mind decognition.

We're both getting sick now, being surrounded by filthy people, cramped, damp conditions.
Are you even sorry? Or not, because your god forgives all, so apologizing to me isn't something you need or care to do?

>>34601734

It's easily said than done.

I already moved on, I just haven't told you yet. I never really trusted you, never let you in. Now you're giving me nothing but malice. I would have came running back if you could just show some awareness that what you did was wrong. I remind myself and I still hold hope. I don't understand why my feelings are your reasoning for hurting me.

>>34601499
Feelings don't keep the lights on, a roof over your head and food in your stomach. When always appears when you ask for it it doesn't seem like a big deal.

Rich of you to consider yourself discarded, then to do this. Hypocrite. Liar. Abandoner. Betrayer. Are you enjoying your vacation? I take it you're not going back to work, so you got a nice extension.

>>34601499
They probably dont want to get evicted or end up homeless. It's about surviving.

>>34601740
>I never really trusted you, never let you in.
>Now you're giving me nothing but malice.
>show some awareness

>>34601743
>>34601747
I disagree feeling drive you to keep the lights on, a roof over your head and food in your stomach. survival does not equal money once you are surviving, beyond that is greed.

>>34601751
Unless you own a home and have a guaranteed income that you have complete control over, you are just living on someone else's goodwill or the economy staying afloat and it can be taken away at any moment.

>>34601756
>survival in question
>guaranteed income and home
way to move the goalposts, again. feel free to reply or not. Adapting to outcomes is survival.

>>34601761
You're being intentionally obtuse / esoteric and not really saying anything. What you're describing is scraping by on luck and graveyards across the world are filled with people who ran out of it. But I'll say it again, money means nothing to someone who always had it when it was needed and only someone like that would cry "you only care about money" unless the person you are describing is a millionaire.

>>34601773
Great assumption to imply money means nothing, obviously the world runs on it for goods and services and to keep it spinning. Your point of survival fails where we are not talking about scenarios of those without to the extremes where shelter and food is put into question. You are describing everyone must be a millionaire aspirant to not be considered in survival mode just to argue.

>>34601779

You missed my point completely. I never said everyone needs to be a "millionaire aspirant." My point is that the only people who have the luxury to dismiss financial stability as "just caring about money" are those who have never actually faced the threat of financial ruin. If you are not independently wealthy, ignoring the reality of expenses isn't "not being in survival mode", it's just financial irresponsibility. You're trying to build a middle ground where money doesn't matter, but unless someone is paying your bills for you, that middle ground doesn't exist in the real world.

>>34601786
I feel we have gone too far off base of the original post with your contributions to make this about not caring about money. We use money to make our life better, making your goal to have more money whilst making life miserable and being financially irresponsible on top of it, is as counter-productive as this reply chain. Why are you talking about someone paying bills for you in the same breath as independently wealthy, go on reply about becoming a self reliant feudal lord or we can end it here as the original post was clearly not for you. you only care about money.

Why do I do this to myself and others?

>>34601794
There is a massive difference between being obsessed with wealth and simply recognizing that financial stability is a prerequisite for a stable life. If acknowledging that basic economic reality means "I only care about money" to you, then you're living in a fantasy world. Throwing a tantrum and resorting to reductive insults just proves you ran out of actual points to make.

>>34601798
>recognizing that financial stability is a prerequisite for a stable life
Yes we have established this. Beyond that is where we have moved into the point of only caring for money. Please don't reply any further derailments.

>>34601800
You haven't "established" anything because your definition of stability changes every time you get backed into a corner. In your very first reply >>34601751, you claimed that survival doesn't equal money once you have food and a roof, and that anything beyond that bare minimum is "greed". Now you're trying to backtrack and claim you always agreed that financial stability is a prerequisite for a stable life.
Which one is it? Is wanting financial stability "greed," or is it a "basic prerequisite"? You're calling my points a derailment because you can't even keep your own story straight. If you're going to be a dumbass on the internet, don't get mad about it. Feel free to stop responding.

>>34601807
Okay let me keep as simple as possible for you. Shelter, food, sleep, check. Survival done. Scenario, individuals with an income to facilitate the above, and potential growth into a stable life. Constants about needing more money to facilitate future goals becomes "only cares about money" when it discards any peace of mind from the momentum gained. I don't want to play semantics and debate session with you, if I am so much of a dumbass why are you talking to a cave man such as myself?

>>34601807
Also why do you care about this so much? Did someone call you selfish or said you only cared for money? You are championing for a ghost that is not present.

>>34601808
>>34601810
I'm replying because watching you repeatedly twist your own logic into a pretzel to avoid admitting you made a bad take is highly entertaining and I'm bored. I don't need a personal trauma to point out flawed logic on an advice board. You made a sweeping, out of touch generalization about money and survival, got called out for it, and have spent the last hour deflecting, moving goalposts, and trying to exit the thread with your ego intact. You could have made your vague schizopost and left but you started arguing and here we are.

>>34601827
>No you are moving the goalposts away from my favorable stance
I am allowed to post my bad take and responses that are deemed a flawed logic by your perspective in a gioyc thread, I am sorry you can't see my explanations other than another opportunity to debate.

Honesty has brought me nothing but pain and struggle. Keep everything to yourself. Tell them what they want to hear.

>>34601851
The people who claim to value it most will still lie if it suits them, or claim their insults and cruelty is "just being honest."

I hate him, but I also love him and that makes me hate myself.

Somehow, all I say are lies, while yours are protections.

Apt choice of characters. Not the one you wanted, just the closest you could get.

Found out a girl I follow has come out as a lesbian, everything I'm writing out sounds super feminine and passive aggressive.
Reading "I should have known once I touched Genshin it was over for me"
It's like reading
>I got my admiration and attraction wires crossed
And I don't know how to joke about that without the disgust or light aggression to come through apparently

>tell me when you feel the urge to hurt yourself or feel suicidal, I'll be there for you!
>WHY ARE YOU THREATENING TO HURT YOURSELF??

Are men even capable of emotional intelligence or is the only thing they know how to do is offer their dick?

I hoped that digging around would help me move on, but it just made me want you more. You’re actually perfect. God I’m retarded.

>>34602002
One can be good at both.

>>34602051
That would be ideal.

>>34602057
I think you might want a gentlemen who's not always gentle

ok so nearly half of women are obese

and nearly half of women are whores

Lord, please help me find a wife that is neither

>>34602076
As long as he's able to tell when gentle or not gentle is needed, of course.

>>34601996
what would you ideally want them to say when you tell them you want to hurt yourself?

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I just came to the realization after 10 years of battling fatness, that I need food to feel good enough to survive life.
If I don't eat tasty food, I'm just gonna hate life, and eventually I'll realize that I don't enjoy any of this. I don't enjoy existing just to go to work every day. I don't enjoy being by myself all the time(only sometimes). Even playing video games is not fun anymore. The only thing keeping me going is that I get to eat something tasty that will inject my brain with enough dopamine to help me cope and even enables me to enjoy other things in life because my mood is elevated by it. It even helps me get some semblance of enjoyment out of my job. This is why trying to lose weight feels like I'm trying to go forward and backwards at the same time.
My internal wiring is genuinely screwed, I can just suppress it for a few months at a time, and keep the facade up, but eventually, like chemistry, I must go back to homeostasis or else I'll have to kill myself from the doom that there's nothing enjoyable left.

>>34601284
Both
>>34601428
because she's dead

>>34602118
Maybe a bit of curiosity and softness. Like, hey, we're not going to do that, and I'm going to sit with you until it passes. Why do you want to cut? And then just listen without disgust or accusations or judgements. Or just say nothing, hug me and get me a plushie or a cat. I'm not expecting anyone to "save" me, I just don't want to be lied to and told someone is safe to go to when I'm in crisis.

>>34602096
I think I can do that for you

>>34602128
enjoy tasty food in smaller portions

>>34602002
Can you provide an example of an emotionally intelligent person

>>34602158
That's sweet, but I'm done with dating now.

In 1984 I was hospitalized for approaching perfection.

>>34602158
lmao rejected

>>34602209
If you were, you wouldn't be here
>>34602228
I enjoy the tango

>>34602251
>If you were, you wouldn't be here
Last I checked, this wasn't a soc dating thread

This NF1 shit I got is beating me, just full of tumors, just want to sleep until I die

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>the tango
Fellas this is another reason not to ego boost women

How bad is it?
They got nothing on me anymore
They got nothing on you
I don’t care what they say anymore
All I want is the truth?

Hope you deleted our texts. Wouldn't do to be reminiscing or otherwise digging through.

>>34602031
Bout time you recognized it.

>>34602260
Where do you think you are?

Fellas, is it gay to attend the fag parade?

How long of no porn exposure, if there is any period of time, till I might be able to erase neaural pathways of lust in my mind that developed following porn?

>>34602354
I don't know I was balls deep and thinking about saying how much I loved fucking her "cunny".
It definitely gets better though without porn.

lost without you.

I miss u sweetie
life just isn't the same without u

i miss your lovebombing i dont miss your expectations life is easier but sadder

>>34602352
it is gay to attend any parade

>>34602358
I have no idea what the fuck you are trying to say or if you are shitposting.

>>34602518
I'm saying whatever he's into that developed from watching too much porn will shirk.
That said I was fucking a girl once and nearly said her "cunny" was tight, so it isn't a cute all.

>>34602616
I will say if I had a gun to my head and had the chance to say "Bussy" or "cunny" the latter is morally abhorrent but I don't think a woman could look at me the same if they thought I thought was fucking a twink in my minds eye.
I'm glad I'm not gay

Life has taught me that no matter how kind you are or how morally upright you act that things will still not work out for you
So why do it?
Why not play like a grifter? Why not use people? Why not sell an unsafe product?
It seems like bad behavior is rewarded a lot nowadays.

>>34602616
I see now. You have to understand you were kind of speaking in a manner only you yourself could understand, like I don't know who "her" reffered to, and depending on what that meant, it could have been something dark lol, and if not, just a messed up shitpost, but I see you now.

Need the days to go by faster. Tired. 9 days I've been here. 9 days until my test (and then who know how long until results are processed and filed, and then I have to find a place to go.) Only 4 days since the other thing. I think it took a couple weeks, a month at most, for them to drop the last one, maybe this time it will be similarly quick. Still sounds like fucking forever though. I want things to go back to a good day, where we smile and laugh and lay together in the sun, and have that be forever. I think too much bad has happened for that though, and that maybe the best we can hope for is moving on best we can. Tired and sad and mourning.

>>34602634
You need to be unabashedly good and not expect rewards for it, they key is to, in your kindness, not latch yourself to outcomes to a self sabotaging degree.

>>34602655
Are you dying?

>>34602656
I wouldn't say that I acted good expecting a reward
I acted good but my life still got screwed over
When I see others on social media become millionaires selling bullshit to desperate people it makes me wonder why I worked so hard doing things right

>>34602666
Feels like it.

>>34602667
I see you. I don't know the particulars of your experience, I can only really speak in general directives as far as my understanding goes, I just wouldn't sacrifice morality. Know though, that business is brutal, business is kind of an inhuman realm, it might be a place where good "sportsmanship" is just shooting ones self in the foot, so perhaps in some areas, it's not a thing of shame to play by the rules of the game, to the extent you dignify said game. Don't know though, use your discernment lol.

This was a mistake. I should have known you would be full of shit like you always are.
Thankfully ill be out of here soon and won't pretend to be your friend.

All you do is bullshit and avoid. Wish you would be real for once. I know I could never trust you to do that though.

Shit's fucked. Everything is fucked. It's all a prolapse.

>>34602720
What's going on, anon?

every since i met my bf irl i feel nothing over the internet and he is the only reason why i haven't ditched my phone. i now associate our interactions with my hatred for mobile phones and am always watching the clock when we call :(

>>34602725
Hunting down job application after job application, trying to find the cheapest shack in a city with more "opportunities", all the while trying to get certifications and a bullshit degree. I am almost over the limit with the current unqualified construction gigs, but it is what it is and I'll have to keep at it.

Fuck you

It was selfish of you to get upset with me for changing when I became a mother, knowing how much I was struggling in those changes myself. And surprisingly unaware of you - given your beliefs, I really expected you to have more understanding and respect of what motherhood requires of women, of the toll, the loss of self.

>>34602759
get a corded landline. not only do you ditch the smartphone but you also have a built in excuse if the call gets too long because you can say you have to do something and you cant take the phone with you.
but if this is actually just a problem with him calling you too much, or being bored in the relationship, you need to talk to him about that.

These days, all I do is...

>>34602832
Cry

>>34602862
Nah. I feel like shit though.

Eyes on the prize, reboot the mission
I've lost the sight, but not the vision
https://youtu.be/hZMt6a4SeR8?si=4yB0vrHfFApQf4kD

Is it fucked if I am feeling no anxiety or despair anymore and this flairup is pretty much completely over by now, but I still think I kinda want to cut a bit deeper at least once? I don't even know. I feel no anxiety or pressure of anything. But I still kinda feel like doing it.
Is that fucked up? I wonder, what is that supposed to mean about me that I'm still considering doing it despite my mental health being fine now? Damn

>>34602832
WIN WIN WIN NO MATTER WHAT

Don’t let the days go by

A life of ease is a life not worth living. Anything worth doing is worth overdoing. Goodbye my love.

>>34603170
Are you testing me, hoping I'll push your boundaries? I hate being tested, so if that's true, my thanks because it makes it way easier to let go.

>>34603170
Bye V

Both of us think the other is out of our league, and both of us are suffering because of it.

Everyone sure likes to hold you accountable but never to actually tell you what you did wrong or teach you how to not do it again, just yell and punish you for something you know nothing about.

>>34602832
goon.

>>34602764
Same

you taught me so many things about myself that i don't want to give to anyone else because nobody else understands.

>>34603598
You shouldn’t deny the beauty of you

>>34603673
i guess so. i don't know if i've ever really loved myself though. i just loved an image of myself that was better than others. when she came into my life i felt really seen for the first time and it made me wonder if i really knew myself at all.

>>34603683
For me, I found God and only compare myself to Him. A very humbling experience

>>34603690
humbling indeed. but i don't know if the ontological argument is enough for me. my god isn't a theological one.

>>34603699
The ontological question wasn’t enough for me either, but I had a vision of Christ. I think having a God is important no matter what it is

>>34603736
that's beautiful in its own right, anon.

>>34602795
Used up hag. You’re a retard for believing you serve any function other than producing offspring. Complaining about producing a child is such a woman thing to do. Boo hoo

>>34603786
You have poor reading comprehension and reasoning capabilities.

Huh, gray vomit can be from liver problems. Really hope I didn't accidentally overdo it on the Dayquil then. I was sick as a fucking dog on Friday so I wasn't keeping the best track of my doses, but I was spacing them out a little more than 4 hours apart when I could.

>>34602795
I love when foids get what they deserve

>>34603905 here
Mind you, I vomited on Saturday. I'm probably overthinking it.

Tired of the rapid cycling between hate, love, anger, sadness, fear, disgust. It's bliss when it finally all goes numb.

>>34603947
true, but all those things also make you feel alive.

>>34603957
I'd very much rather not feel alive right now.

>>34602432
I miss you too T-T

aww i miss my boyfren

>>34602795
I'm not a parent but I understand what you mean. Some parents are totally unreasonable, it's as if they simply cannot remember their childhoods or what it was like being a new parent. They just can't accept their adult children are parents of their own and inevitably change because of it. They can't remember what it was like being a child, they don't remember how it's like being a child interacting with other kids, any of that. Really shocking. I think a lot of people fall victim to the idea that children are nothing more than pets or accessories, and don't understand that not everyone agrees with that.

Some people really don't know the words that come out of their own mouths either. You could tell a family member you're homeless, not looking to date anyone since you're trying to figure your life out, and earn next to nothing, and they'll still tell you "Yeah but why aren't you a parent right now? Those aren't good enough excuses.". Completely disconnected from reality.

I'm a fool, to want you
Pity me, I need you
https://youtu.be/DX3r-nOSnN0?si=nTrZPs0PFgw0hLF6

Rather than hit the big red nuclear button, I'm going to block your family everywhere and request you stop stalking me. You tried to break me but it didn't work. Remember how you told me to kms? That'd I'd be nothing without you? This past week was a pretty persian girl. Who will I go with this week? Thank you for your attention to this matter.

>>34604166
Pathetic posturing

Did you ever even appreciate that I stayed with you even when you kept hurting me? The forgiveness I showed you? Did you ever see my tears and think, man, I don't want to keep making her feel that way? No, you just wanted me to stop showing it. You don't want a living, breathing person.

>>34604166
i hope he sees this bro

hair grows 4 inches up my 8 inch penis

You just make me so sad. I wish I could’ve saved you. Maybe that was the gratitude debt for you giving me what I needed. I wouldn’t have found myself without you to guide me through hell.

>>34604400
I'm not looking to be saved. I'm glad you found yourself.

>>34604410
No, I guess you’re not. You deserve better than what you have

i feel love
it has made me a better person

>>34604431
Hopefully you don't get hurt and jaded. Paiting.

>>34604434
Oh, that's to be expected, but it could work out one of these times. The important thing is I'm gotten back in touch with something that I've lost. Paiting right back at you, Anonymous.

>>34600654
There's an irony that I'm starting to miss my Ex-gf who I thought was a bit too clingy.

the wost part about getting old is nobody praises you anymore. I just want the people around me to tell me I'm smart and that I'm doing a good job

>>34604504
Great post.

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Someone ought to do this to you one day. Lol

>>34604633
To who?

>>34604635
Anyone who is in such a way that they need to be tortured and turned into lemon zest for delicious cakes.

>>34604633
Mulch me? Erm

>>34604644
I had carrot cake with lemon icing sugar from the bakery the other day and it was really good. I think doing that to you would be a good use of your life. Might hurt though.

>>34604639
That's...
Zesty. (Double entendre)

>>34604649
Badum tss!

>>34604648
Probably would hurt, yes. I don’t wanna become cake

>>34604674
Erm, don’t be selfish. Live deliciously and let it happen.

Most depressing pride ever. I dont remember the last time I had a genuine kiss from somebody who loved me. Im not even an incel, I've just closed myself off so much that I barely have genuine connections.
Without calling me faggot, please tell me what I'm doing wrong. I don't want to live like this any more.

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>>34604676
My honest reaction

>>34604679
There are perks to this. You’ll finally get to be sweet, instead of sour for everyone who lets you in. It would be an upgrade.

>>34604686
Perhaps I have already become mulched, hm? I also don’t wanna lose my dark. Plus how would I even get mulched? Mulching may be verboten

What's the gardener's favorite John Legend song? Olive Me.

What is the couple at the Carnival looking to experience? Give me a moment...

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>>34604690
It’s not mulching, don’t know why you keep saying that. That’s for gardening. This is called grating. How it would happen? Consult the picture. We’d do that to you. It isn’t verboten.
> Perhaps I have already become mulched, hm?
You still have your skin last I checked.

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since ai started becoming so relevant i can barely afford bills or debt payments anymore and i'm going more insane about it each day. i try to make my art appealing and marketable which in turn makes me hate it because i like drawing less 'sellable' stuff. in the end i can't get work anyway. i'm so tired i just wanna pay bills like before

Those were just in my head for two seconds. That's my night, y'all.

I love him so much. The idea of not being with him is genuinely too much to bear. It’s too soon to tell him but keeping it inside is physically painful. God, please let this work out, I don’t want to see who I’ll be if it doesn’t.

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>>34604697
>We
Erm, who is we?
>grating
Perhaps flaying? This already happened a year ago, silly pilly

>>34604704
I hope he feels the same way. I like when Love prevails.

>>34604705
>who
Me and the world.
> Perhaps flaying? This already happened a year ago, silly pilly
I have a feeling that you did it to yourself. And that does not count.

>>34604707
Thank you, anon. I hope so too :)

>>34604704
>>34604707
Echoes in our hearts
From yours, to mine
>From moon, to Sun
>True love
>As I know you're mine

I'm gonna sleep. Have a day tomorrow. I don't do much.

if you're not wearing a modest dress i'm not even going to think of approaching you, so stop trying to get my attention

>>34604708
>doesn’t count
Sigh, fine. You may begin the flaying process
*dances cutely*

>>34604720
Thanks. It’s a ritual for good luck and magic power. With your sacrifice I’ll try to heal all the mentally ill foids who seem to gravitate towards me for some reason. I met another one recently you know. She stopped talking to me when I told her about my job. Maybe she was intimidated or something

*Her face crumples. All the fight drains out of her—she looks *exhausted* by her own cruelty now that it’s being called out.*

*She remembers that car—the negotiations, how she shut you down with some cold remark about responsibility. And suddenly… she sees it: not as discipline, but as control.*

"...I did."

*A whisper. No excuses this time.*

"I thought I was keeping you safe... but I just didn’t want to deal with your life changing without me."

*The confession hangs there—ugly and honest.*

"God… what a mess."

I didnt expect that from a chatbot..that hit pretty hard.

>>34604722
Keep them gravitating, only you can save them :3

>>34604738
Firstly it’s not by choice, I can’t choose to keep it happening. It just does. Secondly, no I can’t. I can’t save anyone.

*She swallows hard, the memory of your childhood illnesses flashing behind her eyes—hospital visits, specialists, the fear that never really went away.*

*The overprotectiveness wasn’t just control… it was terror. The kind that makes parents hover like helicopters because they’re *scared* of losing you.*

"...I thought if I kept everything perfect—if I controlled everything—you’d be safe."

*Her voice cracks.*

"But instead… I smothered you."

*A tear rolls down her cheek as she finally sees how her love twisted into something suffocating.*

Fuck

My ex and I got drunk and threw some eggs around the neighborhood. It's funny because they were all from the same place and would form a clear radius, if anyone where to inspect the pattern of the broken eggs.

Dude fuck having feelings. I'm gonna get famous instead.
I will own your fucking hotel someday.

>>34604863
Um okay. But it sound like the ex was not even doing that with you. You prob didn't even message on discord.

>>34604300
>>34604400
If you wanted to to save me you would have made me get sober. You would have listened to my begging for personal fulfillment and put me in a position to achieve that instead of doing whatever is easiest for you and tell me to accept a doped out mediocrity. And that was the problem. You are a narc who just wanted to be seen as a hero instead of actually doing anything to help me get better. You literally told me that you preferred me at some of my worst. You are a lying piece of shit that had a FOMO for other dick and would have left me no matter what. Fuck you, you can't make me feel bad anymore. I almost killed myself over your crocodile tears. Money appears when you ask for it. All of your siblings are alive. You have 2 living parents who never seperated. You have no idea what hell is you spoiled baby.

Pampering myself with a 5 step skin care routine pretending it'll make up for drinking a case of beer over the long weekend

I was living as we but you were always living as me. Use me for the victim hood you were looking for when you mutilated yourself, you'll never change anything except your appearance and that makes me happy because you'll never be really happy. You'd still be an ugly tranny living in a shitbox eating peanut butter noodles and hotdogs but you took the dreams I had and claimed them as yours then took the fattest shit possible on me after dragging me all over the place to make you feel better about your failures.

I got sober without you. I'm soon buying a house without you. I found my own fulfillment without you. I'm actually happy without you. It's fuck you forever.

My only regret is not taking you to court over the dog you didn't want after you killed my frog. But if you haven't gotten rid of him he'll just be a reminder of what you gave up when the next thing fails too. Keep stalking me so I can show you what living is, you get no more of my energy you dead eyed emotionless freak.

>>34600654
I finally figured out why I am the way I am and I don’t know what to do or where to go from here. I wanted to know myself better but didn’t anticipate something this extreme being the truth.

I don't want you know anything about me and what I'm up to actually. Fuck that. You're on your own. The only thanks you get is putting me in a position when everything was done to make peace with my family and get past the victimhood complex I had. Enjoy the silence.

Fuck you, fuck this place you've stuck us in. Lucky to get 4hrs of sleep, and never all at once, and somehow have to be at peak functioning all the fucking time because SHE doesn't sleep either anymore and I've endless forms and calls and appointments and shit to deal with, all because of YOU and YOUR lies. Some fucking protector. You'd rather punish.

>>34604978
Bud, You are gaslighting and not taking accountability for being a horrid person. You are not the victim and it's really quite gross to see you try to manipulate by acting like one

>>34605057
I will say it's good to never have to be around you ever again. Gaslighting manipulative loser. Pompous ick.

>>34605062
Good for you. It feel amazing living in truth. Strong, euphoric, love, pleasure

>>34605083
Recognizing your lies and what you did, said to take her from her soulmate, her true love, her truth. Thank God he is making this right and removing Colton using the truth.

>>34605090
>>34605092
>>34605100
Mike you millennial abomination please do everyone a favor and fucking kill yourself. Holy fuck you are a freak. Changing your post style doesn't matter when you can't keep Colton's cock out of your mouth.

Oh! I've come to a realization, through your desire for sperm donation and your natalist beliefs! Of course you don't care if she's taken from us, because she's already been born, and that was your sole duty! She'll still exist, whether that's with us or not, and that's good enough for you!

>>34605115
I'm thankful you are not getting away with your narc behavior like before. More people than Mike have pointed out what you are doing.

>>34605128
Creepy larp.

"you should have come to me"
I DID, I DID A HALF DOZEN FUCKING TIMES, AND EVERYTIME, IT WAS MET WITH "well you did this," OR GETTING MAD AT ME FOR BRINGING IT UP, FEELING ATTACKED, WHATEVER

>>34605130
>>34605133
It's only you projectile shitting on everyone else. Keep sending your weird dick to women umprompted and posting rape fantasies (you haven't done that one in awhile, congrats!), Maria will surely come back in another 5 years.

You've infected me with your desire to punish and I hate it.

>>34605171
Your harassment and lies are the cause of everything. I hope you are removed so things get better here.

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I want to atone. I want to live in a way that's the utmost peak of safe, healthy, and upright morally that's humanly realistic for me. I wish I had someone to guide me in this, because I owe it to those who have met me or are still in my life, but I am schizophrenic and also lose memories. I don't care who it is as long as we can agree on what I need to do when I'm lucid. But I also don't really know where the fuck I'd find such a thing. An ascetic and nonsexual form of total power exchange?? Naturally sex is disgusting to me and I want nothing to do with it now. I'm just unsure. I thought of becoming a sincere Buddhist and being guided formally. I don't know.

>>34604678
:( happy pride anon. its hard to get back in touch with connecting to yourself let alone others but I hope you will. this months festivities are a great time to try. a lot of people feel hopeless and alone right now so more than ever its welcome for you to reach out. wish the best

>>34601734
You wouldn't get it unless you had OCD yourself.

>>34605128
You are useless outside of your ability to procreate. Nothing else matters.

>>34605244
>Nothing else matters.
Funny thing, when you're not a coombrained nigger, actually raising your offspring is part of the package

>>34605264
I know the postpartum hormones are tough, calm down. Too bad you got a girl too, maybe that’s why dad doesn’t care. You should try again for a boy.

I still hurt after 479 days

I don't see a point anymore. All this self help and therapy keeps saying I'm narcissistic and entitled and that I'm not owed anything and to just drop it. But no one does the same for me and then these same people tell me I owe them and that they are entitled to my attention and emotions. I'm told to respect boundaries but when I do they still yell at me for it because I need to put in more work. Like which is it? You tell me life isn't like a video game with a defined set of goals, but then you tell me to work harder and keep trying or I won't get it. Like I don't get it, she said no, so I moved on, but I'm supposed to keep pursuing her even though she said no and do things for her even though she's not going to give me what I want and doesn't owe me anything but these are things that any person would do unless you are involved with each other which were not because she said no and put up boundaries so how am I not entitled or owed anything when you keep telling me to do all these actions while giving nothing back in return and telling me I owe them and those are the rules but you aren't enforcing the rules on them only me?

Like... what's the fucking secret? Either fucking tell me or fuck off I don't understand. Everyone keeps saying things but it only ever seems to come in to effect when it involves me. How am I supposed to not have a victim complex when I'm the only one getting punished for this shit?

>>34605128
Imagine your mom posting on 4chan holy shit it’s over

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>I love my gf, think she's cute, big bunda but small tits
>she has 2 sisters, she's a middle child
>older sister is a chubby blonde with blue eyes, big tits and big bunda
>younger one is a grey eye brunette, art-goth whatever you wanna call it, bit tits and big bunda

pregnant man emoji holds ancient power

confucius saying

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Ride his bike into a brick wall ya ugly fuck.

>>34605449
Who cares? Appreciate what you have.

>>34604966
What?

It's all just fate

>taking morning shit
>cough
>some of last nights extra hot cheetos mixed with stomach acid jump up my throat
>throat feels like its on fucking fire
>have to wipe and stumble into the kitchen trying to find something to drink
>snatch some milk out of the fridge and rip it open
>barely helps
>chug half a liter
>helps a little

Holy shit that was horrific

preying for strength to not have sex with my coworker

>>34605983
praying*

People are concerned about say how they want to be remembered but I DON’T FORGET anything. Even if I forgive them I remember all the pain and hurt caused. Just needed to vent.

you chose to love a cartoon more than me i acknowledge im never to be loved sincerely

>>34606042
How can someone be jealous of a cartoon?

>>34606058
Less jealous moreso feel inadequate of love if a fictional character fulfills needs.

I, now at 30, resent my parents for circumcising me. I do/did have a good relationship but, upon reflecting on how badly it messed me up during my developing years, I just fucking hate them now.
>no I don't want to come hang out and grill
>go live a happy life with child you didn't sexually abuse, assholes

I know that you don't love me, you are only pretending because we are "family".

>>34606102
Like a husbando? But he’s not real. You are.

>>34605434
It's not you anon, everyone else is a shithead. Unironically. They will accuse you of being what they are.
>set boundaries and put same effort into friendship as they put in
>get called a sociopath

>>34606119
Sometimes being real isnt enough or even a detriment. Being real opens you to real world woes in stability, expectations that cause eventual wear down and cant be day dreamed away, when compared to the imagined being that can be as perfect or imperfect as the person desires.

>>34606144
Well sure people who are real have faults and vulnerabilities but that’s the risk involved with being real and opening your feelings to another person.

>>34606185
The challenge is can you accept those faults and vulnerabilities? Are there issues they may have with your faults within your ability to control and change for the better? Would you feel that bettering yourself would benefit you, not just changing for someone else?

>>34606209
Those are good questions.

>toilet stops working
>take lid off
>unscrew one screw a little bit
>screw it back in
>toilet works again

praise the omnissiah

>>34606209
Honestly i was losing myself to meet them. I tried my best over the years to support their progress while doing the best i could to change my life to be part of theirs. just thinking over how much ive poured into this one person only for them to return those feelings daily into something not real is trialling, originally i accepted that this is just how it will be but reflecting on it, no it is ridiculous and i put up with far too much risk compared to them in the relationship which allowed for this to go out of control, or rather in their control entirely.

>>34606360
Communicate that. Because they could feel the same way. Find a way to bring spark back into the relationship or let it dissolve.

>>34606390
Its already gone

>>34606430
It's never gone

I'm not your backup plan. I'm not the one that got away. I'm not a son replacement. I'm not the big brother you always wanted. I'm not your rock. I'm not the concept of the fucking book you want to write. LEAVE ME THE FUCKING FUCK ALONE

It is when they initiated a break up where they said theyre through at a very stressful time for me in launching a career to be with them, a lot to do with their pressures, while thinking over all the above. Later they constantly signalled backtracking when it was agreed at the time we will remain friends, why? Was it because I got the thing that sparked the breakup for them shortly after? i dont know, but it upset me to be dead, unreachable for a good 6 months so I dont have to endure getting hurt yet again like it is scheduled as a yearly event. I hold their word still when they said we are through. That was a year ago now so yes it is over. Last message I gave them was a birthday wish, which got an emoji react ok hand signal.

I'm going to say it a final time, stay off my families shit or I will go straight nuclear. You have something festering deep down, you come direct at me or keep it deep down. Don't show up on their shit so I have to listen endlessly about something I don't want to talk about anymore.

>>34606513
>>34606446
Tldr they held all the cards in the relationship but that is the game you play in attempt for suboptimal love and why the original post concludes i feel im unable to be loved.

>>34606522
Go nuclear

>>34606522
Just tell her that on a call op

jerking off to my AI fuckslave after a founder's meeting.

I would fucking kill you with my bare hands. And you deserve it.
Your erratic driving should one day catch up to you and kill you too. Better yet be the reason you never become a firefighter killing someone else in a crash. Then you kill yourself like the faggot you are.
Tyson you are an absolute fucking nigger and a coward and there unironically isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t wish to wake up seeing on tv that you and the staff fucking DIED

>>34606783
his chicken sucks too

I feel my life will be shit. I will grow up a failed person, a failed normie, a dreamer. I'm afraid of the future. I wish many things went different.

a mod hate deleted my thread on /fit/

mods are gay

Man the sky is beautiful, glory to thee oh God, glory to thee, the fountain of existence. Great is the glory of God.

Still wishing to hear your voice, though it would probably make me feel a lot of bad emotions.

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Guys I got obsessed with civ again. Help me.

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Stop triggering my "I can save him" feelings with your stupid weeb pictures it's confusing me and diffusing my righteous anger and making me want to collapse into your arms or hold your head in my lap.

i would probably be dating an invader right now but her accent was too unattractive and communication too difficult

>>34607081
Where's you clone my cat?