I feel distressed by the idea of hurting anyone other than myself, so why? Why did they do this to me?I can't kill an ant without feeling guilty; I put myself in its place, knowing it wasn't doing anything wrong besides surviving, and I torture myself over it for days.Imagine being able to take someone else's life besides my own? I believe that, unlike my life, life is a gift given to people, and no one has the right to take it away.I torture myself in my cocoon just thinking about taking away someone's opportunity to live. Why? Why did they do this to me?Why does the world have to be so unfair to me?I feel as though a burden of bad luck, disasters, and misfortunes has fallen upon me like it has never fallen upon any other human being.I've lost hope of being rewarded for my kindness; I've seen that the world only rewards people who deceive and lie to others.Society despises good people; society sees them as naïve and foolish because they still believe that kindness leads anywhere other than injustice and humiliation.My life is filled with embarrassments, misfortunes, and injustices. Injustices so great that they make me wonder: "Do I deserve this? I wouldn't wish this even on the worst person in the world. Am I worse than the worst person in the world?" Then I sit down and cry.World, why do you hurt me so much? Why did you choose me to be the representative of misfortune when I never applied for that position?God, do you look at me with disgust? Or rather, do you even see me? You see everyone else, except me.I say this as the most atheist man in the world.God, your lack of empathy affects my parents too, because by making my life a disaster, I'm forced to live with them and consequently infest them like the worm that I am.I crawl through my parents' house and leave putrid slime behind; they hate me and regret having invested so much in this disgusting insect.How can I be so miserable? I just want to die, God. I hate myself so much.
>>34631417I see you, son. Look at the cross. Everything shall pass. If you're sad, that shall pass. If you're happy, that also shall pass. Nothing is eternal besides God.
>>34631417Our complaints only reach the beast, God can't hear us that easily.If you are fortunate enough to be able to go outside just do that and walk every day until luck hits you
>>34631417Ew
