>>34633770
It was over the second you caught the feelings bro. You’re probably best severing the link if you can’t stop your emotions.
It’s going to hurt like a motherfucker seeing her with someone else

>>34633789
>It’s going to hurt like a motherfucker seeing her with someone else
Imagine the phrase 'if you love someone, let them go' .. this totally applies. Be happy for her and emotionally supportive.

>>34633770
What do you want advice about, exactly?

You may be about to go through a lot OP
Because it's going to be very easy to compare yourself to people she actually pursues and is interested in. And if she ever complains about these people, you are going to realize that she still values these people more than you no matter what she says, that she will try as hard as possible to make these relationships work while you're treated as an unconditional source of love and acceptance, an afterthought that she doesn't need to invest time in.

It's really hard to just drop a significant amount of emotional investment and meaning in someone. There is no resolution, no sense of acknowledgement, you are where you are because it's where she wants you to be. And if you feel that constant sense of comparison and insecurity, it may be best just to cut contact. I'm going through something similar to you, and it's at the point where everything she's ever said to me feels like platitudes, where I begin to question if we were even friends or if I was serving a purpose for her more than she was for me. And her actions (as well as inaction) right now speak much louder than anything she's said. I tried to gently cut contact in the kindest way possible, got ignored for 8 days because she was too busy with her weekend date, and then got a ChatGPT response. And when I responded sarcastically to the ChatGPT, that almost ended the friendship right there because it pissed her off. I finally ended up giving the truth, she approved and refused to end the friendship, conversations became bland and shallow, she ghosted me for days to prioritize him, I left her last shallow message on read, and it's now been over 3 weeks of silence when we used to talk nearly every day for years.

Conduct matters more than words. How she thinks in the moment doesn't matter to how she acts in the future.

>>34633770
keep trying to ask her to smash a few more times in case she's one of those needs to be chased bitches and then drop her, there's no self respect in the friend zone

>>34633770
So basically you wasted an entire year becoming "best friends" with some bitch because you wanted her romantically, only for the entire year to have been for naught. Congrats. Maybe don't waste an entire year on things that could be resolved in one day.

Get another girl, and make her notice you are going out with that girl, then treat her like nothing happened. This will communicate her, that she is not a priority in her life. And girls hate not being the center of attention of a man that said he wanted her. Even if she gets a man it will be to get you jealous, so invest time in yourself dude. And don't overthink it too much. Women are simple in reality

>>34638271
In your life* I'm stoopid

>>34633770
That's getting friendzoned. It's normal.
You can try to keep some friendship with her, but whatever you do DON'T feed yourself false hopes, thinking she'll eventually fall for you.
Best you can do IMO is to reduce your contact with her and try your best to find someone else and move on.
Keep in mind that if you do move on you'll likely gradually lose contact with her. That's normal and desirable in this case.
I know it hurts, but it's better this way for both.

Give yourself some time to process it all, and again, don't cling to it in hopes things will change. Godspeed, OP.

>>34633770
in the real world with well adjusted people, this happens all the time. look at it this way: she sees some future incompatibility that you don't. she knows that dating you wouldn't end well for this reason.

for the sake of argument, let's say, she's just not attracted to you. say you wear her down and she gives the relationship a chance anyway.

now you're stuck in a dead bedroom and it's worse than being single because not only are you not getting sex but there's feelings involved and when you break up you will lose this friend forever.

you shouldn't get mad over rejection. understand that you are incompatible with this person and knowing the reason why might hurt your feelings, so just move on.

>finds woman attractive
>doesn't tell her for a year
anons, don't do this

>>34638367
why not? there are plenty of attractive people in the world. not every single one of them is available to me. not every single one is even compatible with me in any way other than that i think they are hot. it's fine to get to know someone, or just be friends with someone, without spilling your guts immediately. it's normal actually.

>>34638404
>it's normal actually.

No, its not. Hiding your intentions and larping as a friend is cowardly , dishonest behaviour. It has nothing to do with genuine friendship, where you are just friends.

Also you don't meet women by "spilling your guts" unless you're like 12 years old. Learn how to flirt, learn hot to initate a kiss and get over your fear of rejection instead of this garbage "its normal" coping.

>>34638419
Not him, but in my case, we were both seeing people when she tried to make friends with me, and she pushed the friendship really hard in the beginning because I'm she wanted perspective and an emotional outlet since her relationships tended to be volatile. It was never a secret that I thought she was gorgeous, but the timing just didn't work. The first time we were both single (and she started gravitating towards me a lot more especially when she needed help breaking up with her boyfriend and moved out of a group chat with me and a mutual and start speaking exclusively to me), I decided to ask her out. Got turned down.

im in a similar case where i met some girl online and we spend a lot of time together just me and her but i found out she lives with her bf and her bfs mom (lol) and he doesnt even work but she does. its pretty clear that she likes me and knows i like her off of how much flirting and attention she gives me. its painful to go through some of the shit tests but she is much older and more mature so it feels easier to pass but at the same time its painful knowing she still has a bf even if he ignores him for me (lol). my current plan is to save up money and work on myself so i can make an attempt to steal her from him and depending on how that goes i guess i will have to cut her out of my life. it's gonna be a long and painful rest of the year for me until i get to that point. even if i dont get her at least i will have improved myself some. Why am I simping hard for some girl online? idk our connection just feels special and she is very much my type.

Honestly bros hypergamy just means you will always have a chance to get her later on as much as he will always have a chance of losing her to you.

>>34638419
>larping as a friend is cowardly
It's not really larping, some people want to first know and befriend the person rather than jumping straight into a relationship with someone they don't know well.
But it's true that the more you wait, the more likely the other person will find someone, and the more likely you are to feed yourself false hope.