>put knitting needle up my urethra>get to near the base of my cock>hear audible popping sounds>breathing gets laboured and vision gets blurryHow the fuck do I explain this to the ambulance?
as always, terrible day to have eyes>I dont know what I was thinking and I'm very sorry
>>34635515You just explain it to them like you just typed it nigga? What do you mean how?
>>34635515Tell them you were fishing for a kidney stone
>>34635515Have sex with the nurse
>>34635515Show them your post.
>>34635515Why would you put anything up your dickhole?
>>34635515Youre a perverted freak, I hope the doc ridicules you in any thinkable way, you disgusting freak.
>>34635515tell them you tripped
>>34635515Act a bit schizo. Don't be even remotely aggressive, and be personable, but try to seem "off" in your responses to stimuli (a single offhand remark about how lights "feel", for example). When they ask you how you hurt yourself, nonchalantly say that you got itchy, and when you were trying to scratch, you slipped. Don't show shame or embarassment. They'll mentally write you off as nuts and giggle about it, but they probably won't think you're the degenerate freak you are.
