I often hear this advice when I talk about having missed out on my youth and the social developmental milestones which didn't happen with me and that I'm soso young and that I still can turn my life around. But where is that "outside"?I go to the arthouse cinema every week but most of the people are there in groups and the single ones disappear the moment the credits stopped rolling. I've been doing this for 3 years now and I only embarassed myself three times. (nothing happened)I have no real friends that could invite me anywhere (parties)Nobody goes to clubs/bars/festivals/concerts alone and they're fucking expensive>join a sports clubI suck at every sport that isn't swimming, I might be genuinely handicapped.So /adv/, where should I go?
>Fly to Asia, Thailand/Philippines>open tinder>swipe yes on everyone>ask local girls to take you somewhere and do something because you are new in the area
Look for nerd hobbies that require talking. Warhammer and Magic the Gathering have become money sucking shit holes but you could still make some casual friends there. Both groups would be very helpful to you and tell them you are a newbie but super interested in learning. it's going to cost you a few hundred dollars but you might make lifelong friends. They are also losers so will be happy to meet new people (you). Just don't play mono red, only faggots play mono red.If you like swimming so much go take a SCUBA class, costs about 750-1000 all in including your fins, mask, and weight belt but it's literally an activity you do outdoors and with your cert card you can join local clubs that do group dives and SCUBA divers always need people to dive with for safety, built in buddies. Then go to Thailand on a SCUBA trip and plow yellow snatch all day.
>>34639333>Thailand>>34639256>Thailand/PhilippinesWhy do you want to send me to Thailand
>>34639225>Nobody goes to clubs/bars/festivals/concerts alonethats where you're wrong kiddo
>>34639225Gym, dance classes, music classes, shooting range, any community center.You can also try booking a trip to Thailand and the Philippines.
>>34639225In your case, I'd define "outside" as follows: any place where you have the opportunity to socially interact with a given group of people repeatedly over a certain period of time. And, while at said hypothetical place, you'd do your best to build social connections of varying degrees(acquaintances, colleagues, friends, close friends, lovers, etc.), and,if you're successful in doing so, it'd would further increase your chances of being invited to new places where you'd be capable of repeating the process explained above.
>>34639510>if you're successful in doing soI wouldn't be asking this question.
>>34639522It's a matter of how much time and energy you're willing to put into trying again(and inevitably failing) until you reach your desired outcome. But I agree that bitching on 4chan subtly asking for a one-size-fits-all solution is considerably easier though.
>>34639333Wrong on so many levels. NEVER join nerd hobbies, especially the money sink ones. All the pathetic subhumans you don't want to be stuck with will be there, not to mention- absolutely no average looking females. Do only normie hobbies.Agree with going to Thailand.
Go to a semi-safe country within South East Asia or South America- download dating apps and do NORMIE things.
>>34639333What’s wrong with playing mono red?
>>34639225Go for a walk in the park
>>34639225When people say "just go outside" they're giving lazy advice. What they really mean is "figure it out I don't know". They themselves have social lives. But when you ask how that social life was built, they give vague answers. The reason is because even though they have a social life, they don't actually know how it happened.The autist/NEET will say "Because they are Chad/confident/big dick energy/genetics/luck" and they would be wrong.The normie fag will say "Because they went outside and made efforts" and they're also wrong. Because autists who try and fail put in efforts but their efforts got them nowhere.So what the fuck is it?Socialization is what it is. It's a process, a slow one, one that starts as a baby aged 3+ months old all the way into infancy into teens into adulthood until death. A process that wasn't chosen by the normie, it was actually chosen for them. By their own parents and other caregivers.In other words, socializing is something you get conditioned into you through being raised a certain way. This is why normies struggle to describe in detail how it works, because when you ask a normie "how to socialize" it's like asking a fish "how to swim". The fish swims but the fish didn't have to put effort into learning it like a skill, the fish just swims, because it's a fish. Same with normies they socialize, because they socialize. It's something that was baked into them consistently growing up. They can tell you where to go, what people to talk to.. but they can't tell you why you should go to X over Y. Or how to talk a certain way at certain minute by minute social contexts and quick-time queues. Or how to correctly interpret hidden meaning behind someone else's words or behaviours.These are all things they learned passively without thought, they learned it as infants and have taken it for granted and that's why you get stuck on their advice. Because they can't actually see the problem through your eyes.
>>34639808Although your points are undeniably true, your wall of text is basically useless in the broader context of the board we're in, and you're probably justing venting about your own inability to be a well-adjusted normie. In that case both you and OP should commit suicide and try your luck with reincarnation (pray for better parents). So, since you're clearly a redditor as well use your blog-writing skills to provide actionable advice at least.
>>34639852Oh okay let me be more concise and board appropriate. Fuck yourself, I don't have the inability to socialize. I have the same socialization skills I described that was conditioned into me. I've never had a problem making friends and I can make them very easily as effortless as grabbing a drink out of the fridge. The reason I can do that is because I am unfortunately good at manipulation, I know what people want to hear and I can exploit that easily. I admit I am not a well-adjusted normie. I am over-adjusted, too much socialization, too much dealing with people's shit as a kid. OP is under-adjusted. Normies have the benefit of being in the cozy middle. That is why I reminded OP of the fact normies cannot see what he sees. Because I know exactly what he sees, I just have the words to outline it for him.Normies don't bother their ass to do that.Okay actionable advice for OP:>Greet the person (your target)>Wear a smile on your face, appear as though you enjoy the other person.>Ask them questions about themselves. The person is a fish. The '?' is a hook, reel them in with ? (Questions about themselves). >Whenever they speak about how something felt whether they express pride or joy or sorrow or frustration, mirror it back to them>Nod your head, repeat back their sentiment "yeah like you said, that's totally blah blah">They feel seen/heard/understood>Their egos become hooked, you are now someone they want to be around.>If you want specific info about their lives from them>Just give them some of yours, fake or real doesn't matter. You open up, social pressure forces them to open up in return>With the new information, use that to advantage, mold the convos to appeal to that >They want to be your friend now>If it's a woman, she wants to date you/fuck you.Not that hard.
>>34639891>Ask them questions about themselves. The person is a fish. The '?' is a hook, reel them in with ? (Questions about themselves).That's where it falls apart, for whatever reason.
>>34641108>That's where it falls apart, for whatever reason.It's all in tone of voice. Something autists or otherwise unsocialized people always forget. Did you know that, depending on which tone of voice or vocal inflection you use to speak words, can drastically change the social context to the point you deliver a secondary meaning? For example. "Fuck off".If someone says this in a monotone one-note voice, it means "Go away". If you were to raise your voice an octave higher and add a pause between 'fuck' and 'off' and prolong the pronunciation of 'off' so it sounds like"FfucK. o-ofF!"Then to a normie you just delivered a different message. You didn't say "Go away" you said "You're kidding me" in a playful tone. So if you ask questions in a dead-pan monotone voice, if your speech isn't 'animated', people will feel like it's a questionnaire or a game of 20 questions and will be bored or irritated. But if you ask the questions in a tone of speech that indicates feeling mused, or enthralled by interest, or enthusiasm, then people take the bait instantly. Humans want to see that you are emotionally moved by them. It tickles their ego. And you need to act as though they have moved you if you wish to get them on a leash. Look into speech nuances and vocal practices. It's a game changer and allows you to run circles around normies once mastered
>>34641108>>34641154Oh and of course, what I am teaching you is the first steps of manipulation, actual manipulation not the paperback book shit you buy from swindlers baiting desperate idiots with (though I respect their hustle). And I am telling you the steps on how to manipulate the social circumstances because that's the only way for autists or NEETs to catch-up. It will require learning and practicing manipulation, getting into people's heads, deliberately fishing for their blind spots and then using that to socially boost yourself. For me I cannot trust myself to practice it myself anymore. I am on the psychopathy spectrum and my antisocial tendency always ends up exploiting others which is bad for me long term. I firmly believe though if autists learned manipulation they wouldn't use it in 'bad' ways. But would simply use it to gain connections and enjoy fulfilling social lives. Give it some thought
>>34639225I have the exact same problem, what I did was to find people from my area on discord but even then it's hard to maintain a friendship
>>34641577How does this work?
>>34639891Suppose two people with this strategy meet and both want to ask the other a question rather than talk about themselves too much. How does this work out?
