>>34651227
Forgot title, unlucky

>>34651227
>I'm never going to be able to afford it
Do yourself a solid, and forget that social shitpost. "I can't afford kids! Kids are expensive!" It's a total fabrication, a lie that's spoken by childless youths who want to justify their hedonic lifestyles to themselves to excuse themselves out of family life without feeling shame.

There is no shame in choosing not to have a family. But there is great shame in inventing weird copes to excuse yourself (kids are too expensive!)

Breast milk is free and comes on top from the mother. A very small % of women cannot produce milk, very small percentage that's not worth factoring.

Baby clothes you can get the entire first year's worth for around $100 if you thrift or sometimes even for free if you visit community run baby clothes banks, items donated by other parents to give other new parents the help.

Diapers are were things get annoying. High brand sets you back a few hundred every several months. But if you go for cheaper brand it gets easier. You also have the option of re washable diapers.
You can get the baby crib for cheap, $100 sometimes less. You can get the moses basket for half that price.

The most expensive item is the baby stroller and car seat. You always have to buy those brand new because of the risk of second hand damage to those = danger for baby. So depending on brand your looking at $500 - 2000

And that's it. All in all the total cost for baby first year is about the same as when a NEET drops a couple of thousand for a gaming PC. $2000 guarantees a solid first year. And it gets cheaper as time goes on, because baby stops drinking breast milk as much, moves onto semi solid foods, that means less pissing the diapers, less diapers used, less money spent. You can also then resell any baby furniture the baby grows out of to gain some money back.

Parents in remote jungles and subsaharan shit holes who still live in huts have babies and nurture them without money. But we can't?

>>34651227
>>34651247
Also don't call it a "hormonal problem". I presume you're a woman. I'm a man and even I know that shit isn't a problem. That is a feature, because you are a woman and your instinct wants to express its nurturing aspects, you want to become a mother and that is normal. Don't gaslight yourself into the modern individualistic egotistical nonsense if pretending to be above your own natural rhythm. We are still humans, and have been modern humans for 300,000 years. Just because the past century has been less family orientated does not erase this from us. Go and find a good man and have a bountiful family. That is your birthright

>>34651255
>>34651247
>>34651227
Also
Yes Kids scream and cause chaos and are hard to manage and they can be a headache and a bundle of pure agonizing stress. But they provide also the most meaningful and heartfelt and fulfilling and loving moments you will ever know in this life. That same kid who throws a plate of food and screams in a tantrum is the same kid that uses it's tiny legs to run to the front door, smile on its face "Mommy! Mommy! Daddy-daddy~!" Excited to see you come home, like their superhero showed up. Spending their own time scribbling cute doodles of holding your hand. All that good stuff.

And as shit and hard as it can sometimes be with raising kids, at least the problems have solutions, the day to day chaos can be solved and managed. It comes back again but you just solve and manage it again. Each time your brain receives the message: "Finally problems that can be solved. Problems that have meaning."

The alternative, of being alone, the mind can't find problems to solve. So it will devour itself and attack itself. Depression sinks in or pervasive social anxiety, self isolation, ceaseless cycle of mental problems that have no meaning and thus no satisfying solutions each day.

That's why those who choose not to have families, the smart ones make sure to at least get involved with parenting something else. Like a business or a project or something that takes up their time. Those who do neither mentally rot. I see it all the time. Woman next street, mid 40s, no husband no kids. She just sits outside staring into space. For hours. And recently she's been losing her mind, she probably will go to the mental hospital sooner or later.

>>34651247
I'd factor in birth costs and pregnancy maintenance and multitude of checkups to make sure the baby is safe but you do make a good point. Even those have some avoidable aspects or programs you can get into. Truthfully, I am mostly parroting that from others as I figure given that I'm (relatively) outside of the expense bubble at the moment that they'd know better but internet dramatization is definitely a well known case. I think part of it is obviously if pregnancy occurs without intention that all of that is going forward without question and I've always figured in some senses that I can figure it out. It just maybe feels hard knowing that there's this non-existent being and I choose to bring them into existence and then may struggle in certain aspects or not provide them a comparative standard of care (which as you note with tribal women how it's not as if this is substantially bad and I'd certainly do more than them)... There's also always emergencies and I don't want to be unprepared but hopefully I could manage it. It is somewhat as you say though. It's not unavoidable. Other problems do exist but this may not be that great. I hope so.

>>34651255
I don't think it's wrong to want to procreate or really abnormal but I guess I can't see the same for myself. It just feels so out of place. I don't feel like I'm the type to be a mother. That is to say if there wasn't the biological imperative and instead this was all being judged by a rational individual that I would've never been given these feelings. I can obviously grow and change as a person, I just wonder how much. It would be awful of me to do as much and be some janky mother.

It is natural though and makes sense biologically, it's true. I think my primary issue is probably shame which is something I need to work through. I appreciate your reply. Internal conflict is something I struggle with.

>>34651297
It doesn't matter that you don't feel like you're the type to be a mother. Because you already demonstrate that you would make a fantastic mother. You know why? Because you spent your time dwelling on worrying about being a shit mom. That is proof you have what it takes. Bad parents don't give a shit and they don't care, period. But you care enough to not want to fuck it up. That's proof you actually care, and you care before the baby is even born too. That's mother material through-and-through.

>>34651303
I hope so. I'll just need to get over internalized negativity towards the idea that I'm allowed to want that and it's not some embarrassing inferiority. Regardless of the outcome, it seems unwise to let myself be so mean to myself for wanting something which despite what societal circles that I've seemingly been ingrained in say isn't something weird. Posting things online can be helpful in this sense of realizing what is the more detrimental underlying concept even if I'm not cognizant of it. Thanks again for your input.

>>34651313
That's the spirit. And no problem, have a good one

>>34651227
The cause of your problem is not realizing that there are two ENTIRELY different species out there:

1. children
2. your children