I only have 2 hobbies, playing piano and bouldering. However, I am worried that this is actually hurting my chances of finding a girlfriend. I feel pressured that I need to do MORE. Like also read, write, paint, draw, learn a third or even fourth language, do gardening etc.I don't have the time for that though. Piano takes up so much, daily practice, weekly lessons, music theory, going to concerts, listening to recordings, singing. Same with bouldering, I also do running for cardio, gym for antagonist work, yoga for flexibility.I can't fit more hobbies but at the same time women demand you to have dozens. How are you supposed to do that?
>>34705209You dont need hobbies. Grow up.
More than half of this is shit women do (feminime traits in a guy aka a fag), or shit they WON'T do and expect you to do for them (cooking).
>>34705209>at the same time women demand you to have dozens.Women literally do not care about our hobbies. What they want is to have something to say/brag about when boyfriend/husband hobbies come up as a conversation topic among other women. If you can make her feel equal/superior in that conversation with just one hobby, that’s fine and even preferable for her. If you’re not actually good at anything, then she has to be able to say you fill your time or at least do interesting things despite you sucking at them.In other words, this really has nothing to do with you or your hobbies. If you’re actually decent at piano that’s already enough and bouldering is social so that’s a nice compliment to it.
>>34705209Women only want men with hobbies when it benefits them. That means they can brag about you to friends, or you can do chores that they can't. Otherwise, they view it as a distraction. Overlapping hobbies usually leads to competition, and they will either insult you if you're worse than them or secretly be resentful if you're better at a traditionally feminine hobby. I also don't trust this study as someone who frequents female spaces (I'm a gay dude). Women want guys who are attractive and then will work backwards to justify or enhance that attractiveness with hobbies. Reading is actially a major turnoff for lazy women because they will feel extremely guilty/inferior if they don't read themselves. Cooking can be embarassing for women if they aren't confident in the fact that they let you cook. Swimming is just their polite way of saying "have a beach body" without understanding that most models lift weights, not swim. The reality is that your time is limited and you should prioritize the things that make you happy because they make you happy, not for tertiary benefits. It's okay to pick up a skill with benefits in work or social life, but doing it to impress women is going to feel pathetic and make you hate the hobby too.
>>34705238>>34705296This is it. You are a status symbol and not exactly a person. How much you can increase her perceived status is what matters.
umm yoga ia filled with women though?
https://incels.wiki/w/Scientific_Blackpill
>>34705209I paint. Painting got me laid by a lot of alt girls, but lemme put it this way. Painting was just the cherry on top, they wouldn't have agreed to "be painted by me" if I wasn't somewhat attractive. When women say these hobbies are attractive, it's because they have an image in their head of the kind of men who would do these things. Which are intellectual 9/10s like in their hallmark movies. To further that, considering all of these activities are fucking onions, I'm inclined to believe this was a survey done on Reddit.
>>34705209>I only have 2 hobbies, playing piano and bouldering.at the same time?
>>34705209I read, paint, play guitar, go to the gym and cook and it works with women but my job is seasonal so I have 6 months off to do nothing but extra shit.
>>34705218You have to cook anyway because you need to eat retard. you might as well cook for women since they love it. Its basically free pussy if you can make something theyve never had before. If you don't cook youre probably fat which is why they dont like you.
Women if you manage to attract one with your looks will lie and say they like your hobby then later end up jealous of your hobby because you aren't spending time/money with her.
>>34705765Who said I didn't cook, mouthbreather? I'm saying a lot of them are lazy and want you to do it for them. KYS now.
>>34705592Not too different from men, when some idiot says he wants a "mommy dommy goth gf" he's not imagining some ugly goth girl in some long black dress with full white and black face paint, they're imagining Stacy with black dyed hair, platform shoes, and a mini dress with fishnet stockings.
It feels like nothing is ever good enough. I need to be some kind of polymath in order to stand a chance with people. Otherwise I'll just be judged, shamed, and rejected
>>34708335Or you could just become wise and stop looking for meaning and fulfillment in other people's opinions.
>>34708354How are you supposed to make friends or date if you're not interesting in some way? Assuming you're not naturally attractive and people look past your faults because of your looks
>>34708360Being calm, self-reliant and independent will make you interesting by default. By that same law, being needy, desperate for positive attention and obsessed with what other people think about you automatically makes you a boring and unpleasant person to be around. You're going into this with a desperate mindset about what you can receive from others, which is completely wrong. Your sole focus should be what you can offer others. Be whole and fulfilled first, and then offer that security and wisdom to others.
>>34708376>Your sole focus should be what you can offer othersThat was my point from the beginning
>>34705209There's so many false premises and weird autistic assumptions in this post I wouldn't even know where to begin deconstructing it.I'll just say this, I can guarantee your lack of a gf has nothing to do with how many hobbies you have. By all means, have as many or as few hobbies as you'd like, but do them because you actually enjoy them and not because you think a woman will want to magically become your gf because you have them. Because I can promise you, she won't.
>>34708403>Otherwise I'll just be judged, shamed, and rejectedIf this is from your post, then your point from the beginning was the opposite of what I'm saying. Your point was that you should be chasing hobbies in a desperate bid for acceptance from others. My point is that you should do away with concerns about acceptance from others and become self-reliant. Self-reliant people don't worry about being judged or rejected, they simply do what's correct and allow others to come and go as they please. They already have everything they need for happiness, so their only concern is sharing that happiness with others who happen to desire it. Your concern, assuming you wrote the above quote, is deriving happiness and fulfillment from others which is why you're concerned with being accepted and avoiding rejection to the point where you would be willing to pick up a hobby just to seem cooler to people. That's the wrong way to go about friendships and about life in general.
>>34708443It's not about chasing hobbies, it's more about feeling inferior or not good enough. When I see other people they have so much going on and do so many things and then I look at my life and I'm the opposite. Or if they share the same hobby as me they're so much better at it than me and I have no hope of ever being as good. Why would someone want to bother with me? I'm just too dumb, boring, or incompetent to be attractive enough to people
>>34708517That's why I suggested pursuing wisdom and developing a sense of self worth. Your fears are self fulfilling and self defeating, because when you look to others for affirmation and depend on them and their opinions for security you put yourself in a position where you have to perpetually lean on them. That makes you undesirable and drives others away. If you can do the opposite, which is to become a pillar which others can lean upon, then you'll attract others without even trying, wanting or needing to.
Hobbies are something to make small talk about, it's nothing that actually matters like looks or job or physique or what car you drive.
>>34708540How can you become a pillar when you're subhuman garbage though?
>>34708586Strength of character comes from virtues like honesty, integrity, generosity, selflessness and compassion. There's nothing on this earth that can prevent you from possessing those qualities, because the only requirement before having them is that you want them and choose them over their foils. Moral worth by definition can only come from what's freely chosen, since no one can be rightly judged on the basis of what's outside of their control. Meaning there's never anything that can prevent you from having moral worth, which is the same as saying that there's nothing that can prevent you from being valuable and worthy. It just takes a bit of practice and effort.
>>34708661Having those qualities wouldn't make me feel any less subhuman. I already possess some of those and it doesn't change how dumb or incompetent I am. Why do so many horrible people have lots of friends and partners? Is being a "good" guy really going to get anyone anywhere?
>>34708778Having a few of them in passing isn't enough to give you confidence on its own. You also have to love and esteem them. Which is to say, you have to be of the mind that you wouldn't trade them away for anything else in the world because you gauge them to be valuable for their own sake. Becoming good is the purpose of life, so cultivating virtue and the love of virtue is the only thing that will get anyone anywhere. To that end, I think it'd be helpful to spend some time meditating on impermanence. Wealth, fame, pleasure, relationships, excitement and things of that nature all fade away in time. They never really belong to you, so you can't hang on to them. Only your own character and conduct are permanently yours, which is why that's the only place a person can find security, happiness and wellness. Every moment of pleasure you derive from something temporary must necessarily turn into an equal moment of torment once that thing is taken from you, so it's essential that your greatest joys come only from what can never be taken away. If you don't currently love goodness enough, life will gradually teach you. Coming across dishonest, rude, selfish and cruel people will show you the value of virtue one day at a time. If you ever want to speed up the process, you could also take up studying philosophy. You're the only one who determines what's valuable to you, in the same way that you're the only one who determines whether your conduct is good or bad. So if you can line those two up, so that what's valuable to you is also what you get to control, you'll have peace and self worth. It's just a matter of developing the right mindset.
>>34705209Hobby 1>good genesHobby 2>looksmaxxing
